It is a moment of suspension; of disbelief. B O T H ,
perhaps — though they are so interwoven, Victoria
almost does not realize she feels either. She does
not move; she only stares, ( breathlessly ) , at the
chrome blade the younger woman clutches so
strangely to. Emily’s fingers are l o o s e n i n g ,
her eyes full of … tears? … slowly, Victoria
inches forward.
She reaches for the knife, but her hand slithers
across Emily’s own, instead, fingers overlapping,
curling around the girl’s. She holds it, tightly …
Emily’s hand clutching the blade, Victoria’s clutching
Emily’s … and the older woman moves in, after a
long moment. She takes Emily in her arms fully now
… sliding her free arm around to cup the back of
the girl’s neck.
She breathes against her hateful lover’s skin, closes
her eyes … wanting to stay there for as long as she can
… their bodies pushed upon one another, though the
difference this time is painfully s t r i k i n g … and as
Victoria holds her, she feels so triumphant she may float
away … she is God; a woman won. Though despite her
euphoria, she knows it is naive in its essence … the
notion that this is an illusion does not escape her brilliant
mind … she expects to feel the sting of a blade plunging
into her abdomen at any moment … to feel Emily kill her,
c h o k e, maim and kill her … but, either way, Victoria
has gotten what she wanted.
She holds her still, and, slowly, at long last, she snakes
her hand away, tugging at the blade in Emily’s smaller
one … taking it for herself. The move is gentle and
almost could be kind, though it is never kind; tender in
its toxicity. The nails upon Emily’s neck curl further, the
tips gently pushed against her flesh, and in her ear,
Victoria whispers, calmly; her commands soothing, like
a lullaby.
❛ Get up, and walk over to the bed. ❜
She pushes the blade gently against Emily’s neck, but
does not pierce her skin. She knows it is what she wants.
Perhaps, though, if she tempts her, she will be more
willing to do as she is told … perhaps if Victoria creates
the illusion that she will grant her wish, in the end …
She whispers this, and then places a tender kiss against
Emily’s neck, closing her eyes. Again, once more, she
repeats herself, the blade still promising against the others
jugular.
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