kens @fandomxo - Tumblr Blog

Jun 3

Please, Please, Please - 18+ - Todd Stevens

moodboard - moodboard 2 + characters

characters: Todd Stevens x plus size!fem!reader, other characters, I picture Hunter Schafer as Angel and Jordan Weaver as Jordan but without the other plot, there’s also Robert Dewitt, Gettys O’Brien, Tom Backster, Annabelle Bascom, Mitch Miller ewww warnings: 18+ enemies to lovers, plus size reader, body insecurities but also finding confidence, she has social anxiety too, very minor mentions of addiction, familial mental health issues, mentions of trauma-nothing super specific, mentions of past sa to side character at a frat, along with mentions of homophobia, weed usage, lmao gossiping? they both get a lil sick so some throw up but nothing too dramatic, smut: oral (F+M! receiving), fingering, handjob, masturbation, body worship, protected p in v, word count: 25.3K NOTE: is a hot wet naked guy ever new with me? and specifically lewis pullman characters…. and there are still some topics of mental health but i really just tried to keep it light hearted so there's nothing too specific in here! i hope you love jor and angel as much as I do…i kinda love oc’s…i also didn’t watch this movie again bc i don’t like it but i like the characters so def not canon but whateves.

Todd’s on the verge of failing his composition class, he was able to skate by in his other English classes before but it was no longer that easy for him. It’s his senior year and all the classes he avoided in the last three years were catching up to him. That’s how he wound up in the library, with some girl who was trying to help him write an essay. Todd kept spacing off, told her to pick anything for the topic, he let her decide everything, again-skating by. Then that little bubble he was floating in pops when she finally snaps.

She paused her handwriting to glower, “Do you even want my help?” she questions, her voice tinged with irritation but she was still holding on to her kindness.

He mutters, half-heartly “Yeah, of course.”

This guy practically had his feet kicked up. He was so at ease, she scoffs, “No, no you want me to do the work for you, be honest.”

“I’m a busy guy, frat president and the captain of the hockey team.” Todd counters, as she rolls her eyes.

“Yeah well you sound and act like a child.” she said, packing up her things roughly, before getting up from her spot, “Good luck dick head.”

Todd stares at her in disbelief, astonished at the quiet mink girl’s behavior, turned on a dime and then called him crazy, or well, a dick head. She doesn’t meet his gaze before walking away from him, he doesn’t say anything to counter because in reality, he feels bad, he was being a dick.

She should’ve known this had been a waste of time, that he expected to just sit back and watch her bend backwards for him. Guys like him thought they could walk all over women, his titles boosts his ego, that his titles made him some god around campus when he really was pathetic. He would peak his senior year and then fall into irrelevance.

Todd Stevens, number ninety three, her favorite college hockey player, and they say don’t meet your heroes.

As she walks away, Todd really doesn’t realize how fucked he is. No one wants to work with him, it's his last year, he had no idea how to get through this class, and tutors were booked. He had some many English writing classes and he knew he was absolutely screwed. Y/n only tutors a few people that she wanted to help, and still she had a busy schedule. He had proceeded to screw that up now he could possibly not graduate and lose everything.

Having a meeting with his coach, who laid into him and made his reality more clear, “What do you mean she’s not tutoring you anymore?” Coach Tim presses with a glare into his eyes as he points at him, one hand firm on the arm rest of his chair.

“I-I um kinda pissed her off, thought she would do the work or I mean help me-.”

“Why are you being so lazy? I thought you were a leader, that you took care of the ones around you. I thought more of you, Stevens. I can’t believe I asked her to help you.” he sighs, shaking his head, “She really didn’t have to, I practically begged her not to let you flunk. I don’t know what else to do.”

He had no other option than to face his stupid decisions . No part of him minded seeing Y/n again, but he really did just expect her to do the work. Like she wasn't actually a human being, just some cog in the machine to help him pass. Todd felt bad, really bad.

So the next day, Todd went to the library to hopefully find Y/n, moving through the room before seeing her at the table in the corner, by herself.

Ever since that last meeting he couldn't get out of his mind. At first, he thought it was because he was angry at her for being a bitch but she wasn't. He was the asshole and he realized just how hot she was when she was mad. It might've not been the most wholesome scenario running through his mind but she was beautiful.

In a not so quiet way unless he’s being an idiot, even before, he noticed how her bangs got into her eyes sometimes. How she crinkled her nose when she grew more irritated, even as he wasn't replying to her she was trying to explain things thoroughly. She cared, in this wholesome way that just pulled at something in him. The furrow in her brow when she finally let the anger out, the strictness being something beyond sexy.

His intentions were skewered, because he needed to pass, sleeping with his tutor and fucking it up. It couldn't happen but he didn't want that with her. There was inkingly that once he spent more time with her it would slip into something else entirely. She just seems like that type of girl.

Now she’s In her own world, honed in on her assignment, color-coding with head phones on her head. Her lips forming around the words, soundlessly singing along to the music, completely focused.

He approaches her, sitting down kitty corner from her, and gently shutting her laptop, not all the way but enough. She grimaces at the actions before shooting daggers into Todd, “How did you find me?”

“I mean it’s not really hard to, you’re in the same place we studied.”

She sighs, “What do you want, Stalker?”

Todd pauses for the moment at the comment, before beginning to plead, “I need you, I’m sorry I was an ass. I’ll work, I promise.” he tries, as he easily chips at her exterior, she hopes she doesn’t show it, “I’m sorry for wasting your time, really.”

She doesn't reply for a second, his jaw tenses with anxiety, “How can I believe you?”

“Free hockey tickets? And concessions? Front row seats?” Todd offers, leaning his elbows on the table with a playful fire in his eyes.

“How do you even know I like hockey?”

“You don’t?” he frowns, that crevice between his brow wrinkling.

“No I'm testing you, I already have a season pass,” she reveals, “how about you try your best not to trip on your own feet.”

“That happened once, or like twice…” Todd protests, raising the pitch of his voice with embarrassment, blue eyes wide.

She brings her finger to mouth, “Shush.”

He ducks his chin, but doesn’t take his eyes off of her, searching for something, “You watch me then? On the ice?”

“You're the captain aren’t you?” she shrugs it off, not meeting his eyes, “Meet here tomorrow around seven.”

Todd counters, slightly begrudged, “That’s late.”

“Well other people who didn’t expect me to do their work for them, need my help before,” she counters with a half-hearted grin before going deadly, “Now let me write or it’ll be eight.”

“Aren’t you gonna tell me what you’re writing about?”

“Why would I do that? I barely know you.” she answers, opening her laptop back up.

He wants to know more though, or maybe he wants to piss her off a little, “I mean, if you’re gonna be a big writer some day, I want the inside scoop.”

“715, keep talking Todd.” she threatens, she glares over at him for a fleeting moment.

Todd relents, tapping his hands on the table, even if he doesn’t want to leave, he looks forward to seeing her again. He wanted to push her buttons just as much as he wanted to know what she wrote about. He wants to know how long she’s been watching him-though maybe that was self indulgent. Another rejection to the heart if she corrected to say she really didn’t, but he just met this girl, it wasn’t that big of a deal. Even if she wasn’t like any other girl he’s met before. Which meant not fawning at his feet, rather she had been trying to ignore his existence.

A lot of people like hockey, during practice that night as his blades glide against the ice. He wonders how much Y/n likes the sport, especially since she had the season pass. How many times she might've been in the stands while he was playing. If he had maybe even made eye contact with her once or twice if she was close enough. Todd never really sought out someone like that, now he was gonna be going back for more than triple take on Sunday.

The next day he busies himself with president duties, trying to work on his assignment, even if nothing on the screen made sense-he remembered a bit of what she spoke about. Todd wound up coming up with a topic for his paper, hopefully it’ll show that he did care. He did, and his lack of taking it seriously, came out of ignorance. He did struggle a bit with writing and did a lot of reading as a kid even if he struggled with comprehension. There was insecurity there but it didn't make his actions okay.

He shows up with two mocha’s, simple, a classic-and a peace offering as he sets it down in front of her, he sits down, grabbing out his laptop and notebook.

“What is it? Poison?" Y/n asked, tapping her fingers on the lid.

“A mocha, I didn’t know what you liked and not everyone likes their coffee black.” he addresses, slipping in across from her, “I mean pick either one, they aren’t poisoned."

“Never know since you like stalking me.”

“I didn’t even stalk you.” Todd scoffs, “You’re always in the library.”

“How would you know that?” she teases, bringing the drink up to her mouth and taking a sip, “Thanks.”

Todd starts grabbing things out of his bag, “And I picked a topic.”

“That’s a start, ready to research?” she hums, with a note of accepting his actions, even as baseline as they are.

Y/n helps him research, finds the articles that are reliable to use, and good sources to read from. How to take notes, he knew the jist of paraphrasing but really pin pointing what he wants to convey in his message rather than a bunch of useless information. A reminder on how to structure his paragraphs, that's where he struggles, not piecing together what he needed, but putting it all together. So she took extra time, gently as he struggled because she could tell it was genuine.

She helped a little with citation, she went over a brief tutorial but added, “If you need help just let me know.” she smiles, not a real one but a sweet one that makes him do a double take.

Todd didn’t know that just caring about something so simple would change her opinion, and maybe that opinion wasn’t completely swayed. At least some of the tension was elevated, to make her hate him a little less. She answers his questions, pushes him but never too far. The hard demeanor almost completely melted away.

At the end, when it was almost eleven, drinks drank dry, hands cramped from typing. When he was busy typing or reading, she wrote, he realized just a few hours with her was better than any frat party he’s been to. He still didn’t know how exactly he was keeping this situation so calm, but he liked this version of her-less pressure.

“I can see you next week.”

“You aren’t going to help me finish? This is due on Tuesday.” Todd panics, scanning her face for any sign of reprieve.

“You can send it to me to edit, we can meet Saturday if you really need it.” she offers, taking her time in packing up her things, clearly tired with the bags under her eyes.

“We have practice on Saturday.”

“Well you have a game Sunday, pick which morning works,” she said, “Do you have my number?”

His heart stops for multiple reasons, because she would be at the game. And now she wanted his number?

“No.” Todd said, as she reaches her hand out for his phone, she creates a contact for herself. While he tries to focus on packing up his own things, not on the fact that he was scoring her number, even as the circumstances sunk in.

“You have my email so send it to me there, but text me so I don’t forget about it.” she gestures, as he nods slowly, agreeing with her words.

“Are you in the dorms?”

She hesitates, “Uh yeah, the ones on forth street.”

“Let me walk you, it’s late.”

“Usually you're the type I’m worried about when walking home so…” she jabs without a single touch, zipping up her backpack.

Todd winces, then defends himself, “I get it, I’m an asshole but I wouldn’t assault you, Jesus."

“Yeah they all say that.” she murmurs, not meeting his eyes as memories of how much pain that can put a person through. Todd truly didn't seem like the type though. “But I guess you can.”

He follows after her as she exits the building, making her way down one of the large sidewalks on campus. “You really think I would do something?”

“I don’t know, frat culture, my friend who's been assaulted by a frat dude, I don’t know if it was one of yours but still.”

Todd freezes in his spot, hand coming out with seriousness, “Was it at our frat?”

“No.” she notices, pausing to turn back to him, glancing away to notice the cherry tree they were under that was slowly leaving the soft pink petals.

“Then I hope it wasn’t any of my guys, we don’t usually branch out to other parties, or most of them don’t.” he trails, shaking his head with a furrow in his brow, “I’m sorry, I won’t do that to you.” As she continues to walk, he follows after her. “Uh what’s your major?”

“English, and double majoring in psychology.” she answered. “Gives me more direction.”

“Are you a senior?”

“No, I'm a junior but I might graduate in the late summer.”

“I knew you were a smart one.” he hums, stuffing his hands into his pockets, the fall leaves wooshing down to gently cascade onto the ground, the pollen salting the air, making her nose itchy.

She rubs her nose cutely before giving him a small annoyed smile, “Stop sucking up to me.”

“I’m not, I’m just trying to be friendly.”

“I don’t wanna mess around with you, Todd.” she states, crossing her arms over chest, she shivers, giving him a sharp glare, “I’m too sensitive, just get through your class and leave me alone.”

If she only knew he would deal with his graveling and annoyance until the end of the year. He hoped he really didn't piss her off as much as it seemed.

“Why? What if I like you? What if I want to be your friend?” Todd questions, his hand briefly coming over his heart. She huffs out air through her nose, “Guess you’ll just have to put up with me then.”

“I have a taser.” she warns, “Don’t pull anything, stalker.”

“I’ll keep my hands to myself,” he vows, though there was a playfulness in the air, he means the words with every fiber of his being.

Todd worked hard on his paper the next couple of days, he felt bad for taking up so much of her time. He gets frustrated sometimes, though he doesn't ask for another meeting, he asks her about a million and one questions. She even called him when he panicked and spammed her without meaning to. His thoughts just kept going sometimes and he knew she wouldn't judge him for needing help. She didn’t seem annoyed though, the opposite actually, she was above helpful and resourceful.

Then he saw her Sunday, at the game, right before Thanksgiving break, he never really saw her at games before, Todd usually focused on the energy the crowd exhumes-not anyone specific. A thrum of his friends in the crowd, the few times his parents came to watch him, but now. He sees her front row seat, she looks cute in a uni sweater, tight leggings, a beanie on her head. She sits by herself, not quite seeing him yet when another guy comes over. She stands with an excited smile, before exchanging side hugs, then sitting together, leaning in close. Her friend is the one who notices Todd.

He shrugs it off when he catches her eyes, the almost shy smile on her face, she waves to him, to receive a reply from Todd with a tiny wave. That’s when he realizes he had been staring intently, playing into the stalker role she gave him.

“Oh shit.” Jordan giggles, he wears a baggy sweatshirt and sweats, one of her best friend’s, nudges her with his elbow as he hides a smile behind his hand, blue eyes flaring with humor, “He totally thinks we’re together.”

“Okay? Good, maybe he’ll leave me alone.” she sighs, as Angel comes over with some popcorn. They wore a skirt with red stockings underneath, going up to their mid waist, they wore a cute baggy crop top, a lettermen’s jacket over the top. Angel never walked out of the house without looking hot, that was their motto.

“Are you talking about the same guy you always said was, ‘So fucking hot,’” Angel teases shoving her shoulder, as Y/n rolls her eyes at them in response.

“He was a total dick to me, Ange.”

Jordan adds with a pout to his lips, “Then he apologized and begged for your help.”

“Or what? He flunks out because no one else will help him? I would be on my knees too.”

“You would be anyway,” Angel cackles, she glares holes in both of her best friends, before trying to focus as the game starts up, Todd actually skating out on the ice, looking especially broad in his gear and jersey.

She sees her dad, who stands on the sidelines near the team, giving her a brief nod as he usually did when he saw her in the crowd.

Then her gaze goes back to the infamous Todd Stevens, she hated how true all of it was. How he was always her favorite, he wasn’t the biggest guy on the team, but he was the best. He was fast, smooth as he always got himself out of sticky situations on the ice before they happened, he led with strength. Hot and effortless on the ice, sadly off too, especially when he was prodding her with questions about herself.

She didn't understand that, if he was messing around or just tutoring why would he ask so many personal questions? Maybe he just wanted to know her, maybe she was jumping to conclusions. But the way Todd looks at her with so much heat and somehow vulnerability, a certain tenderness that only blue eyes hold.

Though the smoothness transferred on to his everyday life apparently. She hates thinking about the short time they’ve spent together. How during the first session she spent an hour and a half talking to a practical brick wall. He mumbled answers, asked her to do everything cause he was quote on quote not good at it. She hated how even as he was being a terrible person, he looked cute and like he really thought he knew how it would all play out, nice and simple.

She had let everyone in her life before high school walk all over her-after she moved away from home that changed. She met Jordan and Angel, who were her best friends, who had her back through and everything, who always solidified her confidence. They helped her find a voice, to feel how beautiful she was, she wasn’t going to let him treat her poorly. It was a red flag, the whole situation, Todd was a walking red flag.

Yet Todd did amazing that night on the ice, played better than usual and no broken bones. They stuck around to let the crowd clear as they usually did, and said something brief to her dad who gave her some money for dinner. They walk out of the stadium, just as Todd walks out to fill up his water bottle-and catches Y/n walking past the tunnel with her friends.

Todd’s shirtless, showing his shiny six pack, broad shoulders, arms that were bulky, and veins, freckles. Once he sees her, he dashes out, “Y/n!”

She pauses with surprised eyes, turning to look at him. Oh god, those were things he was supposed to keep under the jersey, he only wore the bottoms with insulated knee pads and slippers.

“How’d you like the game?” He grins as he notices the way she tries hard not to oogle him, though she keeps making eye contact with the length of his collarbones, his broad shoulders that she kinda wanted to bite. He looked so strong.

“It was good, really good,” she stumbles over her words, “you-your team worked really hard.”

“Because that’s what you were focusing on.” Angel provokes, “I’m Angel, this is Jordan.”

“I can introduce myself,” Jordan scoffs, sticking his hand as Todd nods with a smile, shaking his hand, “We’re Y/n’s best friends, or only friends she always drags us to these games to see y-.”

“Shut up, Jor. See you later, bye!” she shoves her friends off into the other direction with heat at her cheeks. An embarrassed twinkle to her eyes, as she crosses her arms over chest.

Angel turns back with a wave, high boots clanking, “Bye Todd!” along with a charming grin and wink, lacing their arm into Jordan’s.

“I’m sorry about those two…”

“I don’t mind,” Todd shrugs, watching her with a careful gaze, amused by the whole interaction, how different she was around her friends, comfortable in a way she wasn’t quite around him yet. But he was gonna get there, “I got that paper done, really thank you for all your help.”

“No problem, I hope you get a good grade and you did really good out there, Todd,” she relents, their eyes connecting for a moment too long, like time slowly pulls away from the moment all together-to only leave them. The empty hall wasn't making it any better.

Then she notices how many freckles this man had all over his body, how she wanted to trace them, make constellations out of-no,no. She needed to leave right now.

“Goodnight, Todd.”

“Wait uh, will you keep tutoring me? Please? I know we kinda talked about this next week but I fucked up and didn't take any reading or writing classes in the last three years, so now I’m just loaded with papers and reading. I know what I did, trying to push that on you wasn't right. I'm truly sorry. But you actually help me, you listen to me and you don't make me feel stupid. I just…I need you.” Todd relents, letting it fall out quickly with concern in his tone, worry in his eyes.

“Yeah, I can keep helping you.” she mutters, softly, as she begins to step away. “I um, gotta go, before Angel or Jordan comes back to wreak havoc.”

“Night, Y/n/n.” he smirks, she couldn’t find it in her to glare, so she tries to suppress a smile before turning to catch up with her friends. He watches her walk away, he can’t help it, he already misses her, still wants to know more, to talk to her, to just be around her more. God what was this girl doing to him?

They meet next Thursday, early in the day, she had a look of exhaustion on her pretty face, it makes him pause. “Hey, how are you?”

“I’m fine…” she murmurs, swallowing deeply with a raspy tickle.

“Okay, I got you a mocha,” Todd informs as she sits across from him, clammy, pale, she tried to act normal, but her eyes were swollen too.

“Thanks,” she sniffles, and he raises a brow, “Angel’s sick, okay?”

“I think you're sick too.” he nods his chin towards her, not moving to grab out his things.

“It’s fine, you need help on your essay.” Y/n relents, as Todd hesitates with a concerned grimace. “It's one of the big ones, right?”

“Yeah but if you don’t shape up, I’m taking you back to the dorm.” he threatens as she ignores him, slowly taking her things out of her bag-but not managing half of her stuff because she didn’t plan to write. Maybe she would be able to nod off while he was working, drink some of her mocha, and help where she could.

“What’s your assignment?”

She lasts about twenty minutes until her latte comes back up, she runs towards the nearest trash can. Todd follows after her, she feels so embarrassed, even more flushed, his hand comes to her back soothe with no judgement. The other came to push her hair away from her face so it wouldn’t get into the vomit. He helps her to the bathroom where she can stay in the safe zone of the toilet, while he goes back to pack everything up, hefting two bags over his shoulders. He comes back for her, she hobbles out of the stall, while he wets a napkin.

“Hold on, can I?” he holds the wet cloth up, she slowly nods, as he reaches out to grip her jaw, he wipes her mouth with the napkin to get rid of the remains of puke.

“Thank you,” she tries to smile but it's lazy.

Todd hums, before nodding towards the door, “Can you walk back?”

“Yeah, I think so,” Y/n swallows, for a while she walks on her own, slowing down for some water. She walks a little further, then slows down immensely.

“Can I help?” he asked, she hums somberly, walking into his outstretched arm.

“You don't have to, you barely know me.” His palm splays against her back to gently guide her.

“Still I want to.”

“Don’t speak of this…” she grumbles, more so referencing the vomit rather than him helping her, or the intimacy. She would secretly eat that up.

“I won’t,” they walk for a while in silence, she pauses once or twice for a breath, cringing at her stamina. One time they stop at the cherry tree, she runs to a garbage can to vomit into it, as he once again helps her with concern etched in his brows, a soft glimmer in his eyes.

“We’re almost there.” Todd encourages, her eyes flutter as she presses into his side, once more, growing weak

Eventually the building comes into focus, he pushes them to go the rest of the way. When they get closer to the door, she fumbles to swipe her ID, so he aids her, helping her up into the dorm apartment she shared with Angel.

Todd prays it's not the one room situation, where they would be cramped, immensely uncomfortable, he could already smell clouds of vomit, he cringes but squeezes her waist. She leads him to the dorm room, trudging up the stairs, then they approach her room. She unlocks the door for them, entering into a modest kitchen area, a living room attached, one door on either side of the room, a closet on further wall, he wondered where the bathroom was.

He helps her to her room, on to the bed, “I’m gonna go find something for you to puke in.”

“Just want the toilet, it’s cold.” she said, walking like a zombie into her bedroom as he follows her inside.

“Oh okay, um…” he sets down the bags on his shoulders, he gently helps her to stand as he gathers some of the blankets off of the bed. “Just sit there for a second.”

Confused, she sits back on the bed, leaning back as he makes a bed on the floor for her. She could enjoy the cold by the tub and toilet, but he wasn’t letting her lay down on the hard floor. “I’ll find some water for you, um maybe so motrin, are you running a fever? I mean probably…I don’t know shit.” he rambles, as she hobbles over before falling into a lump, pressing her head against the tub to her back, kicking off her pants, making him divert his attention, swallowing deeply, knowing she was just overheated. Not hot. Or well, that too, but he kept his eyes above her shoulders.

She doesn’t say much as she goes unconscious, falling asleep, as he decides to clean the apartment. He comes back to check on her when the sounds of wrenching float through the place. While he cleaned it was clear that two of them had been sick, he was used to caring for drunk sick people-so this wasn’t much different. Angel even came out, they looked better then Y/n but slowly getting color back into their face, “I can make you soup, do you have soup?”

“I think maybe yeah, you’d do that?”

“Sure,” Todd shrugs, “Y/n’s sick…and she was taking care of you so…”

“Hmm, knock on the door when you’re done,” They smile before turning back into their room and shutting the door behind them.

He notes they only have one soup left, so he decides he’ll go out to get some more, maybe some gatorade, more motrin? He had no idea. But he reschedules the frat meeting that night, needing a break from the guys for one, rather he goes to the store.

She answered the door when he came back, “Todd?” in a daze, only in an oversized shirt, “What-.”

“Let me in, I got more soup,” he nods. “And bread.”

She lets him into the apartment, he sets the groceries down, getting some gatorade, ginger ale, crackers, bread and soup-medication that hopefully helped with the cough and tummy issues. She tries to sit at the counter as he makes her dinner, Angel decides to order food for themselves, staying in their room for some reason.

“You came back…” she trails, leaning forward on the counter, failing to sit upright.

“Because you're sick.” Todd said, “Thought I might lay on the couch tonight, to check in on you? If that’s weird, then totally not, I just…”

He hopes he’s not overstepping, but he was worried about her, the way she violently threw up. Then crying about not wanting to throw up anymore and sobbing in pain, she didn’t really deal with illness well. How she clung on to him, trembling, he was sure it wasn’t that bad because Angel was fine. But it was clear that she wasn’t lying about being sensitive, not that he minded, he just worried about her in times like these.

“What if you get sick?”

He shrugs, “Then I’ll go home and crawl into bed, figure it out,” he answers, finding a pot for the soup.

“That isn’t fair.”

“Life isn’t fair.” Todd relays.

“I’ll take care of you.”

“You’re sick, you don’t gotta commit to anything,” he reassures, as she hums, before moving over to lay back on the couch.

She gives a, “Wake me up when the soup is done, please.” before curling up and resting her head on a cushion.

Todd turns on the stove, putting the chicken noodle soup into the pot, giving her a moment to rest. He had eaten some food on the way here, so he would be fine, though he got snacks for later.

He knew he was bound to get sick but it was the least of his worries, until it wasn’t.

Two days later she was feeling better, Todd had to go to some classes, so he left with the confidence she would be okay. The way he lingered was actually really sweet, the things she remembered, he was really respectful when she clang or got upset. When she could barely remember what was going on, he always kept his space, making her fear of being alone with a man fade.

So she doesn’t know if the ‘I’m sick’ text is just a ploy to get her to the house party, she got to the frat that had people spilling out onto the front lawn. There was music booming, she wandered through the party crowd, hoping she could find his room from the vague directions he gave her.

“Oh shit, you’re Y/n,” Robert Dewitt greeted with his slow drawn out voice, he laughs, “Todd talks about you all the time.”

“Yeah? Do you know where he is?”

“His room, he’s like real fuckin sick.” he addresses, taking a sip of his cup before taking a drag from his vape.

“I bet, where is that? I’m supposed to take care of him,” she explains, showing the panera bag, and the grocery bags full of necessities for when one is sick-her mother is a nurse.

“Damn, already got his girl, he’s this way,” he hums, gesturing down the hall before sauntering down further, she follows after him warily.

“I’m not his girl, this is one off, taking care of him I mean. It’s only because he took care of me, it’s why he’s sick now so it's really the least I could, you know?” she rambles, nervously, growing flustered at the idea of having something more with Todd.

“Still he likes you,” Rob said before showing her the door, “The code is 0127. Good luck in there.”

“Thanks,” she opens the door to his room. The place was dark, she could see the shape of a large bed with Todd strewn across the covers, sweat pricking his skin. He only wore boxers, hair a ratty, oily mess on his head, he groaned from the light in the hallway.

“Todd? It’s Y/n, I got your SOS text.” she murmurs, which makes him shoot his head up before rolling it to the side.

Todd's voice raw from throwing up he rasps, “You actually came?”

“Yeah, do you have a fridge? I brought food but you don’t look ready for anything,” she comes over to the side of the bed to flick on a light as he coughs harshly, “I got some vicks for your coughing and drops, some ginger ale for your belly, do you have dayquil? Because I got that too.”

“I didn’t get you all that.” He doesn't move, his limbs are too heavy and brain is too groggy.

“I don’t think you knew what to get, that’s okay,” she said, offering him a polite smile, “Plus you got the ginger ale.”

“My chest aches, like the muscles…I hate this.” he groans, as she roots through the bag for the vick’s, “Would you help me with that?”

“Yeah, just relax.”

Todd sits up on the bed, tired eyes half-moon while she sits next to him with a small tub of lavender vapor gel. She takes two fingerfuls, swipes them along the top of his sternum, along his skin below his collarbones. He groans at the coolness of the vaseline rub as she soothes into his tight chest muscles. It was from all the coughing, throwing up, his body fatigued, ridged, and frankly sore.

She felt bad that he had gone through so much trouble to take care of her. Though not an inch of her regrets being here with him-to take care of him in turn. But also to remember how soft he was with her when she wasn’t feeling well, how soft he was being now. His eyebrows scrunched together when she found a particular knot, to see him so defenseless, it made him seem less intense, not the big hockey star or frat president, or just a jerk, she was just with the sweet mouthy guy she tutored.

Maybe a distant fleeting crush because of the hockey but the sport made women hot, it just did.

“Ugh, I never get sick.” he sniffles.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, I’d do it again,” Todd reassures with a lopsided grin.

“I’m gonna wash my hands,” she nods towards the bathroom, he watches her walk away but then his eyes flutter shut.

Once she settles everything, she decides to stay when he runs to the bathroom to vomit, she follows to push back his hair. To get him water, make sure he got to the bed, ate some crackers, and sips of ginger ale. In her free time, she worked on catching up on her work for the end of the semester. Once she locks in, she speeds through most of it, while editing papers from other people she was tutoring. When he’s feeling better, she stays to help him catch up in all of his classes. It wounds up in the two falling asleep on the floor, with their shit laying everywhere, her laptop dead for class the next day. But she didn’t regret it.

The next time they have a tutoring session, Todd takes them to Waffle House, guiding him through his homework. While he subtly tries to get her to a party where she doesn’t hide out in his room, taking care of him. Y/n doesn’t say yes for the first couple times they meet up, getting closer to the end of the semester.

There were Hockey games where they would visit a little after, even go out to eat with the group once or twice.

Then they pulled an all nighter for his final.

“I uh…like to have a quiet place to go, when I get overstimulated.” she addresses, feeling awkward down to her bones, but knowing she needed to advocate for herself. “I just…I don’t do my best at parties…”

Todd hums, “Well you’ll hang with me, and I can make a quiet place happen. That's why there's a code to my door. Only my close friends know it, Rob, Tom, and Gettys.”

“They seem alright,” she agrees, as he gives a big smile.”

“So you’ll come? This Sunday?”

“Sure,” she sighs, she was worried about the whole thing.

It was getting colder, heading towards winter break so she didn’t go with a dress. but rather some jeans and a tight top that hugged her figure, the curve of her breasts. A curvy woman who worked hard on her confidence, even if she had problems that ran deep, she knew she was beautiful and deserved to be seen.

Todd was waiting around for her all night, not drinking, staying back with friends, greeting others, keeping an eye out for Y/n. When she comes in everything stops for a second, all he sees is her, throat growing tight, heart beating rapidly. She spots him pretty quickly, her hips swaying, giving him a smile before approaching, she looks up at him.

“You made it!” he cheers, nodding towards the kitchen, hand hovering near her back, “Let's get you something to drink.”

“I don't like alcohol." she said, too softly, he frowns not hearing her, he leans in closer to her. Which fills her senses with his cozy warm cashmere cologne and whatever product he puts in his hair, “I don't like alcohol.”

“Oh, that's alright, we've got a secret fridge.” Todd wiggles his eyebrows before going down the hallway to the garage, “Can you hold the door open, it locks when it shuts.” she follows with a tight nod as he makes his way into the garage, she follows pressing her back against the door.

He opens the door to the fridge, “We have fruit punch, lemonade, bottled water, grape juice…” he trails, as she ponders for a moment

“Ill just take some water.”

“Sounds good,” he grabs out two waters, “Do you wanna start out here or in the hide out?”

“We can hang out-.” she gets shoved roughly into Todd, gasping as a bigger blonde guy shoulder checks her, Todd’s hand comes to brace at her waist as his form sways with the force.

Todd glares over at him, jaw constricting, he lets go of her, before following after the unassuming frat member. “Miller!” he booms, his voice almost like a whip as the bigger man stops in his tracks with wide eyes. “Watch where your fucking going.” he seethes, marching up to him and lowering his voice, Mitch glances over at her for a second before looking back at Todd. He nods solemnly at whatever the frat president said before sauntering over to her.

“Hey, sorry about that.” he mutters before walking off as Todd breathes out shakily, coming up to her.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m fine, Mr. Frat President.” she smiles, gently nudging him, trying to lighten the tension, he doesn’t completely believe her, “I’m seriously okay.” her hand coming back to his bicep and squeezing while giving him a smile.

“Hmm, how about we go to the sunroom?” he muses, leading her to the back of the house, where they find Annabelle, Tom and Angel.

Angel doesn’t usually go out to parties, but they are pretty close friends with Annabelle. Everyone was surprised when Annabelle ended up with a frat boy, but it was how it all came together, and they were happy.

She learns that Tom is roommates with Mitch, that he drives half of the frat crazy, that he was able to create some distance-staying with Annabelle in her studio apartment. She was friendly, the four of them chatting for a while before Y/n decided she’d like to take some time to herself. Todd leads her up to the room, saying he’ll be by in a little bit, that he’ll make his rounds and then they can hang out.

Y/n doesn’t know if she believes he'll come back around but another part felt a static connection between the two. Like all of this wasn’t just in her head, that her feelings weren’t appearing out of thin air. That he liked being around just as much as she did, how he helped her when she was sick, how protective he was just now. Maybe Mitch drove him crazy, but there was also something else to the actions.

About ten minutes later, there’s a sound on the other end of the door, buzzing as it unlocks. She looks up from her place at his desk, playing with her fingers as Todd walks into the room. The main lights are on, he moves over to his bookshelf, opening the bottom cupboard, to take out a couple games. “What do you want to play?” he asked, rearranging, he put his bed side table between them, along with his foot stool at the end of the bed for him to sit on.

The two played games for a while, starting off with Guess Who but she got bored so they switched to Sequence, she liked the quiet and he saw how comfortable she could be in it. “You look really pretty tonight.” Todd comments, rearranging a piece as she glowers at him, rolling her eyes. “You do.”

“Thanks Todd,” she said, shaking her head, flushing hot as his blue eyes sear into her before nodding to her.

“Your turn.”

That's when she realizes she had been staring too, and she looks down at the board to think of her next move. She sets a chip down, looking back over at him, "Alright truth or dare.”

“Is this a distraction technique?” she questions, raising a brow as he sets his elbows on the table.

“No, I just want…want to know more about you.” Todd confesses, his gaze sets on to the free cards on the board, trying to think, “You go first, ask me.”

“Truth or dare,” she sighs, he studies the board for a second, or thinking of a reply.

“Truth.”

“Easy one.”

“Depends on the question you ask,” he retorts, hovering his chip above the board.

“Why did you invite me here tonight?”

“I wanted to spend time with you.” Todd answers, easily, as he covers another space. “Truth or dare, Y/n?”

“Truth…” She stares at the board, as his eyes linger on her with a softness, for some reason she grows exceptionally nervous.

Y/n’s usually able to keep her cool around him, not let her crush or interest come to light. Because she thought about him all the time, about how it wouldn’t work out.

“Why did you come tonight? To study?”

She lets out an airy laugh, “To spend time with you, couldn’t we just ask each other these questions?”

“Would you answer?” Todd retorts, cocking his head to the side. “Let me give you a better one, you can too. Something less mundane.”

“Alright…” she agrees, “You first.”

He thinks for a second, the game completely forgotten as his gaze devours her whole, roving over collarbones in her spaghetti strap shirt and the pretty glow of her eyes in the weird crappy frathouse lighting. “Were you a fan of me before you tutored me?”

Her jaw drops a little as she’s taken aback but the bluntness, taking in a breath of surprise, she looks down at the board, setting down a random chip. “Yeah…”

“Really?”

“A big fan, you were my favorite.”

“Were?” he pouts, as she glares daggers at him.

“Well I recently learned how annoying you are,” she kicks him under the small table as he winces playfully because there was no force behind the action.

“What’s yours?” Todd presses, jutting his chin forward as he leans over across the space. That’s when she realizes just how close she was, how close his lips were.

Then there was a pounding on the door, ripping his attention away from her, “Todd? You in there? We have a situation? A fire…?”

“What?” he pulls away, eyes widening as he gets up, Y/n follows after him as he runs downstairs, seeing the fire started in the garage. He grabs the nearby fire extinguisher to put out the fire, huffing and waving away the extinguisher dust. That’s when he sees Gettys O’Brien laying on the ground, blood pouring out of his face, “What the fuck happened? Who did this?”

The other frat guys stood around, acting clueless as Tom spoke up, “Mitch…”

“He’s fucking done.” Todd snaps, before turning around, he pauses when he faces her, squeezes her bicep, “I’ll be back, you go upstairs, I gotta call the cops.”

“I understand, are you okay?” she whispers, scanning his face, as he takes a sharp breath out, forcing a smile.

“I will be,” he sighs, kissing her forehead before going after Mitch and getting out his phone.She tries not to act stunned at the action, to not let her heart go absolutely crazy.

She goes up to his bedroom to hide out, staring down at the chips on the board as she recalls the last hour or two. Todd doesn’t come up for about an hour, then leading her down to give a brief statement to the police about what she saw. Which wasn’t a lot but she was a witness to the crime, and the way Todd shut it down.

Now she saw what he said about this being stressful, especially if any other of the frat guys were like Mitch. His parents are rich, so there’s no doubt he’ll be just fine, but Todd definitely seemed stressed. Once the house settles, she offers just to walk back, “No, no, I’ll drive you.”

The drive is quiet, “I’m sorry for the shitshow, I was having a really good night.”

“Me too, it’s alright.” she shrugs, “I figured out my truth.”

Todd smiles brightly, there’s a hint of tiredness in his eyes, he hums, “Shoot off.”

She had been thinking about this for the past hour, she wanted to find a question but mind was blank. She was lying through her teeth, she still had mute but it was the first thing to come out of her mouth, “Who was your first love?”

“Hmm, that's a good one but I guess I don't really have one, I had a few girlfriends in high school but nothing serious. I'm usually not the type to want anything serious.” He wanted to say more, that he had been falling for her for a while. But he knew she didn't want anything with him, so he tries to ignore the way he wants to scratch over his aching heart.

“Oh, that's interesting…I never had one either, I just never dated. I had a few crushes but they were never really reciprocal…” she sighs, “If I have sex with someone, it has to…mean something, otherwise it feels like a nail to the heart.”

He parks in front of the dorm building as he nods slowly, hands on the wheel, “What if…what if I took you out on a date? I know I’m just a shitty hockey frat president but I really like you and you make me want things…I’ve never wanted before, something real.”

“Stop, Todd.” she breathes out, not meeting in his eyes with a far off look in hers, “I’m not your type, this wouldn’t work out.”

“What does that mean?” Todd retorts, a furrow in his brow as he turns towards her, as she sighs, but she doesn’t reach for the door to leave.

There’s a twinkle in his doe eyes, waiting, pleading for the truth, he wants to move out to touch her, to assure her. Then her words catch him off guard, “It means, I’m bigger, and you-you probably want someone who is thinner and even if you don’t…You’ll see me naked and change your mind so just…stick to writing your papers.”

“I see you, all of you, I’ve seen you barfing in a toilet, and I still liked you. And you are beautiful, I really do like you.” Todd promises, hand coming to his chest, “I’m not going to change my mind.”

“I don’t want to ruin something good, I don’t want to lose you because I’m not enough. I’ve thought about us alot, I want more with you but it’s not worth the risk.”

“Risk what?”

“Delayed rejection,” she whispers, finding his gaze this time, before looking down, his hand reaching out for hers, thumb swiping along the skin. “It hurts too much, to not be enough.”

“You’re everything, Y/n, you’re kind, creative, smart and you’re so beautiful, the most beautiful person I’ve ever met. I’m not just talking, I’m…baring my soul here, I guess.” His nerves making his voice shake, he’s never been this nervous before, he handles himself well, keeps himself together. But not now, not with her, not with the stakes. “Fuck whoever told you otherwise, because once I knew you, I couldn’t stop imaging myself with you…in not a surface level way.”

“What does that mean?” she tries to hide the quiver in her voice, failing at being nonchalant with him.

“It means I always thought about you after our first meeting, even though I had no other options for studying, before I realized that…you were always on my mind. You basically told me to fuck off because I was being a dick and it was hot. But it wasn’t just that, it’s how you still care about me even when you're upset or trying to rile me up.” Todd rambles with desperation, as tears fall down her cheeks.

“I can’t.” she sobs, breaking down, but pulling away, getting her bag and darting out of the car.

Todd wouldn't do anything now but it wasn't over, his feelings wouldn't just turn off. Especially knowing she wanted it too, he didn't know the depth, but he hoped he was properly picking up signs. He didn’t want to come off creepy, or make her uncomfortable, but he wanted her to know she didn’t have to second guess about him.

Todd hadn’t stopped thinking about Y/n, he tried to text her but she never responded. Then she sent some email about their tutoring, so that since his class was over he wouldn’t need her. But if he ever needed help she was here. She was tutoring through the school, which came with pay, so there were formalities. He again tried to text her because he didn’t want this to end, he didn’t want this to be just about the tutoring sessions.

During the last frat party of the semester, he does his speech, but it was choppy, he was always trailing off, not confident in his words. The party afterwards he just sits in the corner with his beer as he pouts, overthinking. He was trying to get her off his mind, but also letting himself fail easily, because he wanted to figure this out.

He wanted to see the little sparkle in her eyes when she first spots him, always trying to hide how deep her affection runs. But always happy to see him, she couldn’t deny that. She wasn’t here though.

So he sat between Gettys and Rob, slumping back into the couch bringing up his beer to his mouth. “You bummed about all that Miller stuff?” Rob asked, as Todd’s eyebrows raised with surprise then relaxed as he shook his head. Gettys turns his head at the mention of his old frat brother who had broken his nose.

“No, no it’s not, he was annoying the fuck outta me and everyone else, anyway.” he shrugs.

“Damn Stevens, where’s your little girlfriend?” Rob mutters.

“I don’t wanna talk about it.” he replies, bringing his beer back up for a long gulp, “She isn’t my girlfriend either.”

Gettys could tell by the look on his face that he needed his brother in this moment, not a friend, so he slowly nodded. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

“She just uh…rejected me, and I just…I need to talk to her about it, get her to trust me.” Todd trails, not wanting to reveal too much about what was going on with her. It was clearly something she was really struggling with and he didn’t need to make that public. Though the humiliation of being completely obsessed with a girl to her completely crushing him was much preferred. Because in reality, that’s what happened, she didn’t trust him to love her, to be a good partner.

“Did you tell her how in love with her you are?” Tom asked, plopping on the chair to the side of Rob.

“You were listening, man?” Todd crows.

“Yeah,” Tom shrugs with a smile, “Here if you need some advice,” he meets the eyes of Annabelle, who stood with a couple of her friends just across the room, he tips his beer to her. That’s when he notices Angel, Y/n’s friend, standing across from her and his eyes center on them as he tries to think.

“I mean he’s not wrong above the love thing,” Gettys hums, “Did you tell her?”

“No…I didn’t want to say too much, scare her off, but I did anyway.” Todd relays, “I tried to say that I’ve wanted her since we met, but she didn’t really get it.”

“Well try again, when did you tell her?” Tom questions.

“The night of the last party.”

“Man see that’s where you went wrong, you need a grant gesture.” Rob comments, keeping to his usual once off piece of advice rather than driving the conversation, “Something special for her.”

“Ahh, he’s right.” Gettys agrees, as Todd stares down the flute of his beer and chews on his bottom lip.

“Should I do it now?”

“I mean why not?” Gettys retorts, shrugging his shoulders as Tom hesitates.

“I mean it’s like eleven at night and you’re drunk.” he reasons, as Todd nods his head.

“Wise man, this is why you’re gonna be the next president.” Todd affirms, “I think I’m gonna talk to Angel, they are Y/n’s best friend. They might know what’s going on.”

He gets up, a little wobbly, noticing that he definitely did drink quite a bit but he was fine. Todd felt like there was something more open about his life as he walked towards Y/n’s friends. Annabelle felt more comfortable at parties now, which made Tom have a better time, Angel was a really good friend to not only Y/n but clearly Annabelle too. Angel’s nonbinary, before in the frat it was something no one would notice until some people like Mitch would make jokes, harass them and be outright homophobic.

Before he didn’t really care as much, he would’ve laughed along too, but now he understood how much it could hurt someone. That it was their identity, that being an asshole just felt…not right anymore. Todd always tried to be a decent leader, but there was immaturity there that changed with Y/n, maybe it’s his senior year being halfway over, or both. He really hoped that Angel was enjoying the party, knowing that Jordan didn’t feel comfortable at parties anymore, Todd hopes he eventually joins too. If he heard of anything happening at his frat there would be hell to pay. It was a frat, there was an engrained excuse of boys will be boys, that helped him before, it still could now. But when he thought of the real trauma that could cause, in hindsight, he thought about how it would feel if something happened to Y/n.

Todd wonders over to the group, “Hey…how are you guys enjoying the party?”

“It’s good,” Angel said, nodding their head, eyeing him with suspicion, hand around a solo cup.

“What’s up Todd?” Annabelle asked, with a slight cock of her head and questioning look.

Todd turns to Angel as their eyebrows raise, “I um, how’s Y/n?” an amused smile lining their lips.

“Why don’t you ask her?” They reply with an unserious furrow to their brow, an objecting stare, free hand coming to their waist.

“She isn’t replying to my texts, I tried to call her but she hasn't been replying. She sent me this formal email but nothing else.”

“Just give her til after break,” Angel said, with a wave of their hand, “Then talk to her, sometimes she needs to cool off, reflect.”

“What does that mean though? Like does she want me to talk to her?” Todd presses.

“Clearly not,” They laugh as Annabelle chuckles, knowing bare minimum of the situation but enough to find the fact that Todd Stevens was in a bit of fit over one of their friends, “That doesn’t matter though, if you really like her, you’ll figure it out-and then you’ll be enough for her, I know she doesn’t see it that way, that she’s actually really liked you for a long time, but she’s amazing Todd, so if you fuck this up…” Angel points a deadly manicured finger at him, his hands come up in mock defense.

“I won’t, I won’t. I’m trying to do everything I can to fix this.” he sighs, swallowing deeply, as he feels a sense of nausea rolling over him, suddenly feeling very solemn

“There isn’t anything to fix,” Angel repeats with a nod, “Sometimes she just needs time. And this isn't a terrible party, might even bring Jordan around.”

“Yeah, sure, he's welcome.” Todd hums with a nod, he wasn't sure which frat felt unsafe but he hoped they both could unwind at his parties rather than be afraid.

---

He waits until after break, and it kills him. He still tries to text her, less frequently but he wants her to know he wasn't giving up, but she never replies or even reads them. Todd doesn’t wait long when they get back from break, in the morning the day before classes start back up Todd decides to surprise her. He grabs her favorite coffee, pastries, flowers, along a fidget he found her. He was incredibly nervous to do this, he really hoped it didn’t end like the last time, he would do anything for her to give him a chance. If she really did want him, he would do anything to gain her trust and make her feel wanted, safe.

Todd has a bag full of everything, coffee in hand, as he makes his way up to her dorm building.

He’s met with all sorts of people, had meetings while being president of the frat and hockey captain but nothing felt as important as this. That coming from a guy whose frat meant the world to him, he’d do just about anything for his brothers, for his team.

A deep part of him knew that he might throw that all away for a girl who from the moment they met he thought he had an upper-hand, but it shouldn't surprise him that she always had it.

He hoped he wasn’t overthinking the whole thing, that he wouldn’t push her into something she didn’t want. In his mind it went above that, she told him what she was worried about, yet he knew for himself-it wouldn’t be a problem. Todd thought about it in every way, how he greatly enjoys her presence, always staring because it was hard for him to take his eyes off of her. It didn’t mean her insecurities still wouldn’t haunt her, he didn’t know how to make those things not matter.

Todd just prayed that as he approached her apartment door, that she would be behind it, that he was showing enough initiative that she knew he took this seriously, her seriously. He knocks a few times, gnawing on his bottom lip, heart pumping fast as he stares at her door in anticipation. He feels like a minute goes past, he can’t really track the time as he waits, but he lifts his fist to knock again.

Then the door slowly opens to reveal Y/n on the other side, she looks comfy, yet so domestically beautiful and she always smelled so good, even from a distance not strong, just her. “Todd? What are you doing here?” she questions, a furrow in her brow.

“Well, I’m here for you, to talk to you.” Todd explains, reaching out the coffee towards her, “Please, lets just talk.”

“I-.” she looks over at him, meets his pleading blue eyes and gives him a chance, “Come in, stalker.” She steps back and he walks through the threshold with a hopeful grin on his face as he scans her with hope.

Being in her dorm never felt this monumental before, she was sick the last time, he had his sights set on one thing, helping her. Now…she leads him to the couch. He takes in just how cozy the space is, the low lighting, all of the posters on the walls, and throw blankets and pillows.

“I got you breakfast too, hopefully you’re up for that.” Todd suggests, handing the coffee to her, before setting the bag down on the coffee table, and grabbing out the roses for her.

She sits down on the couch as he turns to sit beside her, she sets the coffee down for the flowers he gifts her. “This is really sweet, Todd.” she claims, bringing the roses up to her nose and giving a gentle whiff.

“The coffee is for you, there’s a chocolate croissant, some other goodies in there too.” he nods down to the bag, as she leans in for the pastry box and sets them down on the table in front of her.

Todd watches her for a second, a part of him scared he’s never gonna see her after this, so mine as well memorize her. He might be able to convince her to keep studying with him but now she just also knew how he felt. He’s never been this desperate over a girl before, but he usually didn’t spend months pining with other usual hookups or short term relationships.

“Thank you, Todd, but um what are you doing here?” she asked, bringing the iced coffee to her lips to taste the mocha latte he got for her.

“I’m here to…to try and fix this. To ask you to give me a chance, and I promise I won’t do you wrong or take things too quick. I just want you and whatever comes with you.” Todd confesses, sincerity making his voice shake, “I’ve never felt like this for another person before, I-I didn’t say it because I was scared, because I didn’t want to scare you away or love bomb you.” he pauses to take a breath, while she stares at him with awaiting eyes.

She blurts, “Didn’t say what?” needing an answer sooner rather than later, bringing the coffee up to her lips with a sense of anxiety.

“That I’m in love with you, that I have been for awhile.” he relinquishes, dipping his chin and staring at her through his lashes, as a blush spreads across his cheeks.

She sets the coffee down on the table in front of them before reaching for Todd’s hand, hesitant, gentle. He felt a tremble in his limbs, making him feel even more embarrassed, but she just held his hand, encasing hers in his own like it was meant to fit there.

“How do I know this isn’t some prank? Some…jokes.”

“How can I convince you this isn’t? Bring you home to my parents? Done. Bring you around the frat, give you my jersey? Done.” he shrugs with nonchalance and a fake pout, “I’ll take you out to any restaurant or place you want, I won’t ever push you to do anything you aren’t ready for. That’s bare minimum, but I’ll be patient, I’ll listen to you because god knows I love hearing your voice, you can meet my damn childhood best friend, whatever you want. I’m gonna fuck up but that’s inevitable and I would do anything to protect you including-.”

“Shut up,” she mumbles, before stretching across the distance, clasping on to his cheek with a hand, before effectively shutting him up with her lips.

Todd freezes to process the kiss but then his jaw’s relaxing as he slowly moves his mouth with hers, a methodical push and pull. His hands hovering in the air like he wasn’t allowed to touch her, from his knowledge he wasn’t. She pulls back slowly, his nose crashing into hers when he goes to kiss her again. A giggle falls from her lip as she leans back on the couch, fingers coming up to crawl along his face and back into his hair.

“You kissed me,” he sighs, big blue eyes staring into the depths of her soul with a soft admission-a look that told her just how down bad he was. A simple kiss made him breathless, almost dizzy. A goosebumps runs down his spine at her final rake of her fingers through his hair.

“I did.” she nods, slowly, searching his eyes, before gently moving back. “I uh, would like to take it slow, and I might not be the easiest but if you really like me that much, or well love me, then you need to be okay with that.”

“I am whatever you want. Even if you don’t want a relationship we can do that, though I’ll make it clear, you know how I feel about that, I want you in every way.” Todd rambles, adorably, he had a way of just coming undone, letting the little things he thought about around her slip out. For so long the only thing he held back were his feelings for her, and he wasn’t sure he’d done a good job there either.

Their friendship had gotten to this point, the playful back and forth, or when they wanted to reveal their deepest darkest secrets, “I do too…you’re nervous, Todd.” She teases as he scoffs, rolling his eyes.

“No just…I didn’t expect you to kiss me.” He defends as she nods slowly, she leans back in. Todd takes in a shaky breath, before reaching a hand out for her hair, slipping through the strands and pulling her forward the mere inches they were apart.

One of her hands lands on his shoulder as she hangs up on every click of his lips against hers, it’s nothing intense. Nonetheless he slips a little tongue, peaking in, but focuses on the intimate caress, before she takes the plunge, she stops.

“We shouldn’t.” she decides, pushing back, stumbling over her words, a tiny bit breathless, “Taking it slow…just dating.”

“Y-yeah.” Todd hums, clearing his throat as his thumb pressing into her cheek before falling away. “Yeah.”

Todd begins to pick her up from her dorm early before class to take her to the coffee shop, letting her pick the music, have a small amount of time together in the morning. He usually gets them to class on time, sometimes they kiss a few too many times. They signed up for a class together last semester, so they meet up for that, then study together-because any time Y/n had free, Todd asked to fill in, if she wasn’t busy with anything else. She usually wasn’t. Though it wasn't always studying, it was an excuse to take her to the Waffle house down the street. Then at nights, sometimes she would want time alone, or have plans with friends, but other nights they were out on the town, maybe even a movie night in which he insists on making her food, ending the night making out on her bed before cuddling the night away.

They finally get Jordan to come out to a party, after his last experience he was wary about it, but Angel promised not to leave his side. Y/n also did too, but no one believed she wouldn’t disappear to go makeout with Todd. They weren’t official but they spent all their free time together, and spent time with each other’s friends. Y/n, Angel, and Jordan all show up together, not seeking out Todd, they get drinks, she settles for a water that Rob gets her from the fridge. Though now their small group had the code to the garage door. They held the same drinks in the kitchen, but they were usually gone fast to mix up cocktails and such.

Even if she didn't immediately find him, she thought about him. About what he might be wearing, knowing he had gotten a trim for his hair she wondered how it would feel between her fingers. How it would be to have his hand lay against her back, leaning into him throughout the night because he made her feel safe. She didn't seek him out but she was nonchalantly looking around the room, which wasn't sly to anyone.

“God, why don't you just text him?” Jordan teases. “You know he's looking for you two.”

“Be nice Jor, Y/n isn't always a lovesick puppy dog about some guy.” Angel hums, “Though Todd had always driven you crazy, can't believe you two finally got together”

“Well um no not yet, we're taking it slow.”

Jordan scoffs playfully, “Whose decision was that?”

“Mine actually, I mean he told me-” she pauses, deciding she said too much but Angel eyes go wide and they grab her forearm

“What? He told you what?”

“He loves me, and he wants anything I want.” she confesses, growing extraordinarily hot in the face.

“Oh he is totally your boyfriend!!!” Jordan enthuses, “Where has this information been???”

“I've been busy…you know. But I need to make more time for the three of us.” Y/n confirms.

Annabelle eventually comes over to talk to Angel, which brought over Tom and Todd, who stood across from Y/n. Her eyes are always going to Todd, to see his blue ones lingering on her already, taking a small sip from his beer. He throws in a comment here and there, just like she did, but their minds were somewhere else.

That’s when Annabelle and Angel trick the group into seven minutes in heaven, stating, “This is a friendship game! You don’t have to kiss unless both parties consent!"

She hopes that Todd doesn’t kiss anyone he goes off with, then to her surprise she’s the first one to be called back, along with Rob. There are ‘oohs and ahhs’ while she connects her gaze with Todd’s to see his eyes blazing with heat. She follows in after Robert, knowing that nothing was going to happen, he knew that Todd would kill him if he touched Y/n.

He leans back on to one side of the closet, she the other, “How are you?” she asked, trying not to be awkward.

Rob shrugs with nonchalance, “I’m good, kinda terrified of what Todd will think we’re messing around, he might murder me.” She laughs softly.

“I’ll tell him nothing happened,” she said, “It’s not that big of a deal.”

“Bro, that guy is crazy about you.” he confesses with a smirk on his face, “Seriously he would fuckin gut me if he heard if I even thought about touching you.”

“He’s that serious? C’mon…”

“No, he’s that serious, doesn’t shut up about you, he’s changed since he’s met you. I didn’t think he would’ve ever thrown Mitch out, even with that shit he pulled with Gettys but he runs into you once and he’s out on his ass…”

“That’s not true, Mitch was on thin ice, you know.” she retorts, crossing her arms over chest, “Don’t blame me for that.”

“No, no, I’m not, Todd just wants people to feel safe here, I’m just trying to say he’s shaping up, being a better leader with you around, I’m not on the hockey team but they’ve been winning games back to back. You’re good for him and he loves you.”

“You know he loves me?” she squeaks, growing flustered, “He tells you everything?”

“Kinda…he talks about how he feels sometimes that he’s super protective over you.” Rob admits as he laughs, “Seven minutes of revealing Todd’s secrets.”

“I like that,” she giggles softly, “Do we really have to sit in here for seven minutes?"

Robert complains, “Give em’ thirty more seconds, I’m getting claustrophobic as fuck. I uh, Angel, your friend, are they single?”

Y/n gives him a questioning look, “Why?”

“I don’t know, they seem pretty cool. Hot…”

“Angel is single…” she smiles, as he nods, before smiling awkwardly before opening the door to the closet.

“We’re done.”

She nods her head as she follows him out before sitting across from Todd, the bottle spins a few times. All while sitting under the heat of his stare as he tries to fill in blanks that weren’t too dramatic of answers.

Todd gets called back with another girl, he looks right at Y/n when he says, “Skip.” She can't help the bashful smile that grows.

She was growing more giddy, it was endearing to know that he spoke about her, that he really does care so much about her. No one else skipped with him and she had the feeling he would do it again. A part of her was terrified of being a secret, that she would watch from the outside, not be in his life. That other girls would be better to him than who she was. But she was written all over everything apparently, and she liked it that way, realized he was written all over hers too.

“Alright last one!” Jordan calls, before handing the bottle over to Todd, he spins the bottle, staring over at her. She didn’t feel too worried, there was a silent trust growing over all this time and she was beginning to believe in it.

It lands on her. Todd doesn’t hesitate to walk over to her, reaching down for her, she stands up with his gentle guidance before being led into the closet. Once the door is closed, her hands are coming up to cup his cheeks, “You know we didn’t do anything right?”

“Yeah,” Todd hums, darting forward to slowly connect their mouths, “I mean, I was really hoping not.”

She giggles, fingers ruffling the hair at the back of his neck, his hands coming around her waist, “You were jealous.”

“It drove me fucking crazy,” he groans, before taking her lips in his own, not parting for long as she savors the taste of him. “Hate the thought of you with anyone else.”

“It’s just you, Todd,” she promises, pulling him back in as he moves to back her up further against the wall. “Only you.”

---

Todd is always showing up to take care of her, he begins to sleep over almost every night after this, it’s simple, nothing going too far. Just sleeping next to each other, sometimes it got hot and heavy, sometimes limbs got tangled in their slumber. So when they woke up (she usually woke up with him wrapped around her), they stayed there, it didn’t need to go anywhere. Just a collision of lips, soft caresses of the skin, pressing in close.

Everyone knows that Todd has a girlfriend now, even if it wasn’t official, and coach Tim had been oddly quiet about the matter. He didn’t typically like when his players had long term partners, or messed around with the wrong girls. Todd especially expected something because of what he had said about Y/n before, but there was nothing. Maybe he should talk to him about that.

As she began hanging around, the boys got to know her better, even though he hated how they were too obnoxious around her, always saying things to embarrass him. She didn’t seem to mind it, having a friendship with Rob and getting along with Gettys and Tom. Not the most talkative person, she only stayed within the confines of a few people.

He had this cool guy leader persona, but he is soft and kind, a great boyfriend. Todd took care of the people around him, when he loved, he did it hard, with every inch of his being.

It just slipped off her tongue one day when she was on the phone with her mom, Nina, when she was in the store with Todd. She froze, staring over at him, he winked over at her with a salacious grin-she suppressed a giggle. He paused the cart he was pushing, before playfully bumping it into her.

She doesn’t meet his eyes, “Okay, goodbye mom.”

“I’m your boyfriend now?” Todd teases, but almost pleads, moving over to her, a hand snaking along her back.

“Yeah, you are, if you want.” She smiles, leaning in to softly peck his lips.

“I do. You know how I feel.” he utters, kissing the side of her head before moving back over to push the grocery cart.

She turns towards the end of the cart, hands clasping the sides to stop him, “How do you feel, Todd?”

“I feel very in love with a very beautiful woman.” he hums, leaning his elbows on the handle, gaze roving over her with a sparkle in his blue eyes. “Whose standing right in front of me.”

She giggles, gently pushing the cart into him as he grunts, “Oh okay,” playfully, before giving her a big lopsided grin, nose flaring with humor, strong hands gripping the metal.

Even though he had already been her boyfriend in almost every way, now it was official, now it was easier to explain they weren’t just dating. They were together, he basically lived at her apartment now. He was already there all the time, even before things were official, Todd called her apartment his ‘safe haven’.

Their intimate relationship was growing, she was wary about showing her body, even with how clingy Todd was-how clear it was that he liked her body. That it wasn’t just about her body, it was about who she is, wanting to be close to the woman he loves, it helped that she was hot, but their profound feelings, that made everything that he thought was black and white flash in their true colors.

She knew it was a rough day for Todd, she hesitates, but realizes that telling him she loves him, it wouldn’t make anything worse. So when she gets home, she does some self care, making sure she smells good, feels good, putting on some lingerie underneath one of his large t-shirts and a pair of her jersey sweatpants, cut off above the knee and rolled up to midthigh.

Todd had called during lunch, said that there was a problem at the frat, the new frat members causing waves. She knew how much they meant to him but they also stress him the fuck out, and he liked to have somewhere to escape. He had most of his stuff over at her place, not all of it, they just didn’t have room but he knew where he was going at the end of the day.

She started flirting across the phone, trying to turn his day around, “I got something lacey I thought you might like.”

“For me?”

“No, for me to feel…confident, for tonight, I've been thinking about this for a while.”

“Yeah, been plannin’ to get into my pants for a while now?” Todd teases, lowering his voice as she laughs softly, “But really baby, it's whatever you feel comfortable in, whatever you want to do. ”

She wanted to say those three little words right there because for a dumb frat president-he was thoughtful. A great boyfriend, easily one of the best men she knew, sometimes hard headed, mean but he had the best of intentions. He wasn’t who he seemed on the outside. Maybe it was a stupid reason to trigger a love confession, but she was growing so sensitive. The need to tell him coiling in her bones.

Todd comes through the door a little later, she’s making queso and ingredients for nachos, and he sets down his backpack. He makes his way into the kitchen, sighing as she looks up to flash a smile at him.

“Hi Todd,” she greets, sweetly, while he slithers around her body, hands come to clasp at her waist before sliding down her belly.

“Hey baby, I missed you.” he breathes into her ear, nuzzling into her neck and rocking back and forth. His lips gently skate along her skin, palms spanning down to her luscious hips, before sliding around her waist to pull her in closer again. “Can I just stay like this?”

“After supper…” she hums, “And I have an idea, if you're up for it.”

He pauses, turning to lean against the counter by the stove, she mixes in the taco seasoning, he reaches out for a piece of meat, in return she gently slaps his hand, “Ow!”

She rolls her eyes, “You deserved it.”

“Hmm, what’s your idea?” Todd questions, bracing himself against the counter with his hands, elbows arching back.

She stays quiet for a moment, finishing up the meat and setting it on the back burner, moving over to stand in front of him. Her hands come to his torso, feeling him underneath her as she skates them up his body and wraps them around his neck. Todd watches her with careful eyes, a slight grimace of anticipation on his lips.

She whispers, looking up into his eyes, “I’m ready for more, in bed…I don’t know what yet, or how far, but I want to…I’m ready.”

“Yeah?” he muses, his palm cupping her face, bringing her in closer, resting his forehead on hers. “We’ll make it natural, okay? It’s about whatever feels right.”

“Okay,” she smiles, before pecking his lips gently, slipping away to get some tortilla's out, “Now make me nachos.”

“Yes ma’am.” he teases, grabbing two plates and dishing out their tortilla chips, meat, cheese and all the other fixings.

They sit together on the couch, watching some sit com as they relax, catching up about the day. “This is really good,” he compliments, leaning in to vaguely peck her cheek.

Todd talks about his day, how Mitch was temporarily suspended for two weeks from the team, he would be benched but he was just glad he was out of the frat. Since he was the frat president, along with many lines being crossed over and over-he had a sway and almost unanimous vote to kick him out of the house.

Once they are done eating their food, they shove the plates to the side, he moves in closer as he usually does. He loves being close to her, taking her legs in his hand and throwing them over his lap, petting at her thighs.

He talks a little about his assignment that she would help him go over, though he pretty much had it done, she usually checked in on him, if he had some questions or if needed help when he got stuck, and then peer reviewed it. They had come a long way from the beginning, she tells him about her day. She’s tutoring some freshman, her other classes went pretty well, she was happy to be here with him, to think about being closer with him.

Once they were done he went to get up, taking her plate in his hand, “I'm going to go take a shower, just leave the dishes in the sink.”

“I can clean them, you'll make breakfast in the morning and do the dishes.” She decides, walking after him as he glances back at her, before stopping in front of the sink.

“Promise me you won't wake up early and slip away then.” Todd retorts, turning around and pressing his hip into the counter, crossing his arms.

“You're making this complicated,” she muses, reaching out to wrap her arm around his waist and tuck her face into his chest. “I won't,” she relents as he chuckles, kissing the top of her head.

“Kay, now be good.” he tuts, playfully patting her ass, she flushes wildly, he scans her face before he slips away from her.

She was quick to do the dishes, one thing on her mind and that was Todd. At first, she thought maybe she would just start slow, but she wanted him in every way possible. She wanted to confess her feelings, now a part of her was doubting the veracity of his love, what if he didn't want that anymore?

She goes into the bedroom, thinking of his words, “Whatever feels right.” because she knew there was no need for anxiety about Todd. She trusted him with all of herself, no external pressure on changing or looking a certain way.

She freshens up before sitting on the bed, waiting for Todd. The shower turns off, she tries to distract herself with a fidget, laying back on the bed, she decides to kick off the shorts. She shuffles side to side nervously, adjusting her boobs under the shirt as a creaking starts in the bathroom as he walks towards the door. A part of her wanted to warn him that she was in here, but she didn’t, she just waited.

Todd came into view with a yellow cotton towel around his lithe hips, his body soft but strong, the ridge of his abs defined and still slightly damp. She sucks in a breath at the view, gaze trailing up to his collarbones, to his freckled shoulders. The way his damp hair falls over the side of his face, she moves up on to her knees, moving over to him.

“You want privacy?” she asked, half-heartly, moving back on her haunches.

“Nah,” he grins, moving over to the dresser for his clothes, she watches him, especially when he reveals the curve of his ass as the towel slips away.

He pulls on a pair of boxers, then throws on a red cotton t-shirt that sits strictly around the biceps and chest, softer along the waist. Rocco turns around, shoveling a hand through his hair before walking over to her as she sits on the edge of the bed.

“Just sitting here, waiting, all pretty for me.” he comments, thumb petting at her chin, before raking a hand back into her strands.

“I want you Todd, so badly.” she admits, staring up into his blue eyes that could burn holes in her. They're so bright, earnest in the way they search her face like he didn't know what to settle on. “I just don't know where to start, what to do, it never seemed right before and now…Now it's you.”

“Now, we're gonna take our time, no expectations, Y/n/n, I just want to be close to you.” Todd said, ducking down to connect their lips in a slow, methodical kiss-to tell her he was taking it at whatever pace she set or slower.

Her hands come down to strip her shirt off, throwing it somewhere off to the side. Todd’s palms land on tops of her shoulders, gently against her collarbones, to her soft biceps.

She mutters with nerves shaking her voice, “But you want me? Like have sex with me?”

“Yes,” he hums, “I want to kiss you,” he gently pecks her lips before trailing his nose along her cheek, “Lick you, touch you, bite you,” he trails down her jaw before leaning back to search her eyes, “memorize, worship you whenever I can. Fuck you…make love to you. I never wanted anyone more, I've never wanted to love anyone like this.”

Her hands come to his face, pulling him in to ferociously collide their mouths together. Todd moans into her, wrapping his arms around her middle as she draws him closer. He presses her back into the bed, lips moving like they were meant to only move in tandem.

Y/n’s heart goes crazy, absolutely nuts as it races, Todd’s hands brace at her waist. His body fitting on top of hers, as he gazes down at the lingerie on her body. Now that she was laid out underneath him he could see her completely in the matching lace. Eyes going hazy with lust and devotion, a warmth beginning to simmer in his stomach.

He had been thinking about it all night, trying not to but knowing she had picked out something extra sexy? He would want her no matter what she wore but he wanted to show that he really did appreciate any effort she puts in.

“Want me to touch you? Feel this pretty lace, your soft skin?” Todd rambles, she's quiet as he waits, not ogling her body like he desperately wanted to, meeting her eyes-patient but eager, “Do you?”

She blinks out her anxious stooper, as she nods.

“Say it out loud.”

“Please touch me, Todd.” she whimpers, emotional from the connection, from feeling safe in his arms.

Because she didn't just want to be touched, or fill a lonely gap in her soul. She wants to be seen by Todd, to be held, kissed, every little thing he wanted to do, she wanted just as much. That feeling, of wanting someone with their whole selves, it was one of the most freeing. Especially when it came to that someone else, she wasn't alone in this.

His palms are gentle as they start at the swell of her widthy hips, brushing his thumb against where the lace sits against her skin. “You are so beautiful, Y/n/n.” he sighs, his lashes batting against his cheeks as he takes her in.

Todd traces the stretch marks littered across the expanse of her soft stomach, along the crevices and dipping down between her thighs for a second. The way the lace meets the tops of her thighs, tight and molding each curve perfectly.

He takes a shaky breath in as he trails his gaze up her torso, to her eyes. Todd’s hand reaches out to caress her cheek for reassurance, knowing how lost she could get in her thoughts without even trying. Leaning up, she meshes their mouths together with a hum vibrating through him to her.

She clings on to the back of his hair, he relaxes into her grip, slowly moving their lips together, slotting his tongue against hers. He grinds forward, letting her feel his erection, she loved to feel it. She knew he wouldn't take things too far that he could get off by just humping her and vice versa.

All of this was a progression to now, to unfold her insecurities with his gentle touch. Rocco’s lips trail along her face, the side of her throat, along the place where her shoulder meets her neck.

“Let me kiss you, all over.”

“Yes, just-I want to keep my bra on.”

“Of course, but I’ll love you okay? However you are, you're gorgeous.” he hums, “But I'll never cross your boundaries baby.” he kisses along her collarbones and the strap of her bra. “Can I kiss over your bra?”

“Hmm, yes.” he moves down to worship over the curve of her chest, finding her nipples, perking up through the lace. His lips wrap around it, teeth gently nipping, the nub hardening. While his other hand firmly but not harshly palms at her other tit. “That feels so good-”

“Yeah?” he croaked, switching sides and kneading her tit, the fabric that was soaked with saliva, lace dented, slightly torn from his teeth. “You're so soft, so fucking delicious.”

Todd’s hands come to her thighs to wrap them around his waist as he moves down further. He kisses over the stretch marks she tried not to stare at for too long. But he pauses at them, admiring the small ridges and dips of the marks, really pausing to peck tongue at her skin. Her fingers twine into his hair, then he moves down to her panties.

“Just over your panties?” Todd asked, as she hums, petting at his hair as he presses lingering kisses down the soft core, the further he goes, the warmer she is. He tongues at the fabric that was already wet from his hands and worships kisses.

She whines, “Fuck-.” arching her hips into her mouth, as his hands move to clutch at her hips, brushing his nose against her clit, and licking at the gusset of her panties, taking some of it between his teeth to suck on it before letting it go. “Todd,” her voice trembles, “More, take them off.”

“Yeah?” he grins, turning his head to the side to leave messy pecks along her thighs, fingers pressing along her sides trailing down to hook into her panties. “You sure? Once I see you…I don’t know if I’ll be able to stop.”

“Yes,” she breathes, core aching for him as he starts to pull down the fabric around her hips, letting them fall down her legs. Todd hands span against her calves before working up to her thighs to pull them apart, watching her eyes, she gives a nod. He looks down at her heat, making an almost dazed look come over his face, blue eyes glow with lust, and breathing grows uneven.

“Oh fuck baby, you’re so pretty. Look at that cunt,” he sighs, moving down onto his stomach to be closer to her, “Do you want my mouth?”

Even if his restraint was slipping, he would still check. Todd wants her to want it, to beg and squirm-to feel how wet she is.

She pants, “Yes. Yes.”

Todd hums, looping his arms around her thighs to drag her sex closer before licking up her folds, arousal slicking his tongue. She gasps, tilting her head back as he looks up at her, eyes connected, before doing it again, lapping at her. There's a tingle running up her spine, as her toes curl and she moans when he takes her clit into his mouth.

His hips flex into the soft blue comforter underneath them, making a sound into her sensitive nerves as he flicks his tongue. Her wetness beads out of her, while her fingers curl into his strands, tugging.

Todd rasps, sexily, “Hmm that feels good,” grinding his cock for some friction, while he latches on to her clit, gliding his tongue along the pearl while her arousal coats his chin. His fingers come up to circle her entrance, before slipping in a finger as she moans. “Oh so tight, god-.” his tone deeper than usual as he reattaches his lips. He stretches her out with his middle finger before sliding in his pointer.

He pumps his digits in and out of her, the pressure growing in her gut, whimpers, dripping with desire. Her bones relax into the bed underneath, head writhing back and forth on the pillow, back arching when he hits a particular spot.

“Fuck-I, can I touch myself? God-it hurts.” Todd pleads, as she nods.

“Yes, do it.” she nods, dipping her chin to look down at him, as he moves on to his side, pushing down his boxers.

His hard cock springing forward, veins throbbing, his tip ruddy with precome, he spits into his hand before encompassing his length. He pumps himself, while his fingers continue to thrust up into her, his tongue working in tandem. She holds on to him with desperation, crying, as he moans into her. Todd can't help the noises that leave his mouth right into her sensitive nerves, but it throws her over the edge. The tension exploding through her, one of the most intense orgasms, as he rubs at her g-spot to intensify that feeling.

He was almost there but not quiet, he kept focusing on the tip, watching her with heavy eyes. His fingers slip out of her, gathering her slick and spreading along his length.

Todd’s surprised as she rises to her knees, crawling over to him, “Let me.” she whispers, reaching out for his cock. She’s still trembling from her orgasm, but she clasps between her fingers, spitting on his tip. “Haven’t really done this before.” spreading the natural lube along his length, as she begins to leave his kisses on the other side of him. A long vein throbbing underneath her lips, her tongue peaking out to taste the spot-she can faintly taste Todd’s saliva and her arousal.

“Just take your time, baby,” Todd urges on, his hand coming to pet her hair, she looks up at him as she wraps her lips around his tip. She uses her palm to rub at the rest of him, “I-I’m not gonna last, it feels so good. You look so good, baby.” he rambles, as she takes him a little further, lulling her tongue around the frenulum, gently bobbing her head but not taking him any further. “Y/n/n, I’m-.”

His hips stutter forward, but he gently pulls her head back so he doesn’t gag her, but his come spurts into her mouth. She moans around him, making him shutter, letting out a dark groan, as she still works at the rest of his cock. “Did I do good?”

“You did so good,” he breathes, hand coming down to cup her cheeks and connect their lips. “It was so-you’re so beautiful, I could stay between your legs for hours.”

The flush already along her body deepens, as he leans in to kiss her lips once more, as she leans up to wrap an arm around his neck. “I love you, Todd.”

“Yeah?” he asked, cocking his head to the side, his heart going crazy in his chest, Did she really just say that? “You love me?”

“I do,” she whispers, justly, before reconnecting their lips, “So much.”

---

The next weekend during a sleepover, Angel, who had forgone their usually well put together looks, opted for a crewneck and booty shorts, though the nails they wore always resembled their whimsy and pretty aesthetic. Their almost translucent blonde hair tied up in a haphazard bun, contacts gone, replaced with glasses. Jordan went with a pair of comfy leggings, an oversized sweatshirt, his chestnut brown hair swept back messily, his comfort chain necklace underneath. They usually don’t invite Annabelle, but since they’d all been spending time together, they thought it would be fun-she wore similar attire with a sweatpants and a comfy off the shoulder top, her rope twist black hair draping down her shoulders.

They order pizza, making a bed on the floor with Angel’s mattress and most of Y/n’s pillows because she had a plethora of them. They take THC edibles a little while into the night, over time they are slowly kicked in.

Angel pauses the show, moving off the couch, between their friends before sitting down to block off the TV, between Y/n and Annabelle, across from Jordan.

A very dramatic flare in their eyes, “Something happened…” Angel starts with a grin on their face, chewing on the inside of their cheek.

“What?” Y/n asked with big eyes, leaning in with her hands on her knees.

“Rob asked me out…” Angel said with a grin, leaning back and crossing their arms, “I said ‘Why not?’ He’s hot, funny, not a typical frat asshole.”

Jordan gasps, his mouth dropping open, “Oh my god, really?”

“Okay to be honest, I saw that coming, he doesn’t shut up about you.” Annabelle grins, leaning back on her palms.

“Yeah, we’re gonna go to Waffle House next Saturday, low-key. I wanna do what you and Todd did, slow burn.” Angel hums with a nod, crossing their fingers in front of them, “Or maybe not, I really wanna jump his bones.”

“I mean I wanted to jump his bones for a while before we did anything.” Y/n reveals as Angel’s eyes widen with enthusiasm.

“You’ve done stuff? I thought you were waiting!” Jordan balks, giving her a head tilt with a shit-eating grin, she’s silent for a moment, all of her friends staring. “Just tell us!”

“Oh my god, okay, he went down on me and…then he needed some help. He’s so fucking sexy, just like got off on me getting off and I just…you know…helped.” She said, subtly, trying to wave her hand to explain, her face growing hot, “He was really gentle too, I haven’t given a blow job before and like, it’s like seeing fall apart like that brought me so much pleasure, he’s so-.” she rolls her eyes with exasperation, taking a sharp breath out, “Are we done now?”

“Yes, give her a break.” Annabelle humors, giving her a sweet smile as she realized how uncomfortable she was growing.

Y/n hadn’t really spoken like this in the past friendships, they didn’t really talk about sex at home, both of her parents leant more towards conservative about those things. That it was something private, which it is, but she was allowed to talk about it with her friends, it still didn’t make it always easy, but she wanted to. It didn’t have to be something weird, she doesn’t know how many sexual exploits of Angel and Jordan she’s heard over the years. Usually when she was the very single one in the group and now she wasn’t-now she was in love.

“Girl, I’m so proud of you. Blowjobs are awesome.” Angel confirms, "Especially when they’re like really into it.”

“Yeah…” Jordan trails with a somber smile, looking down at his hands, Y/n reaches over to squeeze his wrist. “I just wanna go out there to meet someone again, but…I’m terrified.”

Angel and Y/n share a lingering look, because they knew just how much that assault at a frat party affected him. It was a year ago, he decided to go off with Angel but were separated, Y/n didn’t really go to parties back then. Jordan doesn’t even remember who it was, it was dark, scary, he felt like he had no control.

Afterwards, he had begun to spend more time with Y/n, quiet, watching movies, talking to her about how he was feeling if he could. It wasn’t mandatory, she was just trying to be here for him, and Angel also opted out on the parties. Angel felt bad that they lost Jordan at the party, it wasn’t anything new and normally everything was fine.

As much spunk as Jordan was, he hates being anything but perfect, he had a knack for freaking out a little when it came to small things. Neither one of them minded before, they didn’t mind it now, it wasn’t about that. But it made his recovery harder because he felt like he had to do it the right way, when there really is no specific way or time limit to heal.

Angel assures with a soft caring gaze, “Do it at your own pace, Jor, and we’re for you.”

His eyes darted to Y/n’s supportive hand before glancing up to look at his friends, “I’m just glad I have a place to go now, Todd’s frat is…it’s a frat, there’s assholes but it’s one of the better ones.”

Annabelle confirms, “I know what you mean, before Tom, you wouldn’t ever find me at one of those parties.”

Angel gives Y/n a lingering gaze, “I wonder why it’s gotten so much better…” Annabelle giggles.

“Todd’s so protective over you, he would move heaven and earth, Y/n/n.” Jordan said, as she rolled her eyes.

“The weed’s getting to you.” Y/n giggles, uncontrollably, her hand coming to her mouth. “Oh no, it’s getting to me too.”

Annabelle counters, “He’s not wrong…it definitely seems that way to me.”

“I’m just glad the frat can be somewhere you can feel somewhat safe in, after he kicked out Mitch it really changed.” Y/n explains, reaching over to mess with one of her fidgets.

“God, I hated that guy, he was such an asshole.” Angel groans, turning to Jordan and Annabelle dramatically to rant, “This walks up to me and says I remind him of Frankenfurter from the Rocky Horror show, which isn’t even original or true? I asked him if he liked watching that movie, then he called me a tranny before walking off all grumpy and sad. He was pathetic, he could be a dick to me but couldn’t take it back.”

“I’m sorry, Angel.” Jordan sighs, “That’s-.”

“A typical homophobic frat boy that got what he deserved? I’m happy, and I’m not the one who was either extremely repressed or just a fucking moron.” They all start laughing, falling into a fit of giggles that never seemed to end.

“Probably both,” Annabelle cackles, “He always talked shit to Tom about my arm pits, like grow the fuck up, I almost didn’t date him because of Mitch. But I guess he just felt bad for him, they were childhood friends. He had a choice, so he distanced himself from Mitch. I honestly think that’s what made him so crazy in the end. But I don’t have an ounce of care for that manchild.”

Y/n groans, “One time he crashed into me during a party, like really hard, Todd freaked out on him. When he’s mad his voice drops…” she shakes her head, shivering, remembering, she’s never heard it other times, maybe out on the ice, but it was so sexy.

Now it reminded her of when she had him in her mouth, how dark his voice was. She shouldn’t be thinking about this right now.

“Well didn’t he get kicked out because he punched Gettys?” Jordan questions.

“Gettys is kind of a douche, he’s also nice but like…I don’t know.” Annabelle hesitates. “He’s quiet.”

Y/n shrugs, “Well he’s one of Todd’s closest friends, he’s been nice to me.”

“True…maybe it’s like a maturity thing, do we know if he’s straight?” Jordan questions.

“No…honestly, I could see him being otherwise,” Angel begins with a nod.

Annabelle nods with certainty, “Yeah, he’s one of those guys who likes his frat bro’s a little too much.”

“I could investigate,” Y/n smiles, “Or I should say I’m going to.”

“God, I’m hungry, do we have ice cream?” Jordan groans, getting up from his spot and walking over into the kitchen, Annabelle following with her own case of the munchies.

He knew his way around the place, coming over to spend time with them, or just crash on their couch because he hated his dorm. Jordan was a year younger than both of them, hated the person he was stuck with, Sophomore’s getting a cramped space, bigger than most Freshman’s dorms but he still hated it. He always welcomed over at their dorm.

“I’m assuming you have nothing vegan?” Annabelle sighs.

“I guess not, I’m sorry.” Y/n replies, “We could ask the guys to bring stuff?”

“Oh my god, do you remember that one time we caught you and Todd making out in here?” Jordan giggles, opening the freezer and groaning at the lack of ice cream, Angel frowns in his disgust.

“It was so gross! Like we eat here.” Angel adds, as Annabelle looks at them with amusement.

“We were just kissing!” she refutes, putting her hands up in surrender, now she thinks about her boyfriend again.

They were studying in the living room, when Y/n mentions wanting a snack, so Todd got up to begin making a PB+J for her. She watches him, somehow growing a little hot at just the way he didn’t hesitate to take care of her. Her tummy barely growls, and he’s up to get her something. He didn’t think she should skip a meal, or that she would be fine to wait, he asked her what she wanted, what she needed. It’s refreshing to have someone accept her completely, and for him to confirm it was bare minimum.

She stands up from the couch, walking over to him, slipping behind him to wrap her arms around his waist. Pressing her face into the arch of his back, snuggling, holding him close as he relaxes in her grip, chuckling.

“Hey there,” he hums, one of his hands soothing along her wrist. He finishes spreading the jelly on the bread, turning around to look down with a smile. His hand comes up to cup her cheek, she leans into his grasp, gazing into those stark blue eyes. “I love you,” he sighed, leaning in to kiss her gently.

She hadn’t said those words yet, but it didn’t matter, he said them to her, and said there was no expectation of her saying it back. That if she didn’t like it he would stop, but she loved it, she loved him. She was terrified of saying anything, but that fact made the tension even thicker, made her heart yearn for his.

She grasps on to the back of his neck to kiss him harder, tongue slipping past his lips, while his hands move down the curve of body. Todd flips them around as she giggles, he swipes the sandwich out of the way. His hands grabbing two handfuls of her ass before lifting her on to the counter, she always gasps when he does things like that. He can’t hold her up for long, but he could man-handle her and it drove her crazy.

His palms trail to her thighs, pressing her center to him as she feels the rub of his erection, it wasn’t the first time she felt him. They haven’t done anything aside from grinding against each other, there were times where he couldn’t control himself. Where he tried to pry himself away just for her to lead his movements, enjoying the way he falls apart so easily, shuttering just from rubbing himself against her. Todd loved the control, he wanted more of her, he would take anything he could get. Even if it seemed embarrassing the first time, cheeks red as fire, she whispered, “That’s so fucking hot.”

One of the things she really liked that he was doing now was when he took two handfuls of her chest in his hands, his lips moving along her neck. To kiss those places she likes, even if he couldn’t properly touch her, he learned where he could. He could feel her nipples pebbling through the fabric of her t-shirt, it was the weekend so she forgone a bra. Todd moans into her as he presses forward to rub his hard cock against her.

“EW!” Angel groans, covering their eyes, “In the kitchen, really?” Jordan’s behind them, giggling behind his hand. They hadn’t even noticed the door opened…

“You were totally close to fucking!” Angel laughs, as they lean against the counter, getting on their phone. “I can doordash, just use my dad’s card.”

“Don’t do that, he always gets mad at you.” Jordan replied.

Angel confirms, “I know, that’s why I do it. He’s not gonna do anything about it, he feels bad for a deadbeat.”

“Todd could bring stuff over, or well I’m sure he could. He could also make us sundaes instead of doing it ourselves…” Y/n counters, wandering over with her arms crossed, only a short distance from the single room with a kitchen and living room.

“You just miss your boyfriend.” Angel teases,

Annabelle refutes, “It’s not a bad idea.”

“I mean it's cheaper.” Y/n tries with a shrug, though everyone knows her alternative means, "Nevermind."

“No, let's do it, I’m tired of standing.” Angel sighs before wandering over to lay back on the mattress, leaning their head back against the couch.

“Are you guys sure?” she questions, hesitant.

“Tell him to bring Rob.” Angel smiles, waggling their eyebrows as Jordan sits next to them, giving Annabelle a welcoming grin, “And Tom.”

Annabelle felt a bit out of place with them, they were good friends, but they hadn’t really spent a lot of time with the four of them. It was a different change of pace, the three were all so close, but it wasn’t tense. There was an easiness in the air, no expectations, the other three were chaos and didn’t pretend to hide it. They happily invited her into that.

“And he has a duty to get half of the candy aisle.” Jordan adds with a pointed finger as she smiles before calling him on the phone.

“Hi Todd.” she giggles, staying in the kitchen as the other three begin to chat again.

“Hi baby, what’s up? It’s like eleven.” Todd mutters, softly, “Is everything okay?”

“Yes, yes we’re okay. But…we are significantly stoned and dying for sundaes.” she answers, “Would you perhaps wanna bring Rob and Tom over and make some ice cream? We want a lot of candy, big bowls, the whole thing. Also Annabelle needs vegan everything.”

“Alright,” Todd laughs over on the other side of the phone, “Why Rob?”

“Per Angel’s request,” she winks over at her friend who glowers in return.

“Oh okay, well you wanna send me what candy you want? We’ll head here soon.” Todd hums.

“Okay, and I miss you and love you.”

He hums in amusement but also feels that soft ache in his chest at her sweetness, “I miss you and love you more, pretty girl.” she grows hot before hanging up from her phone.

“You really are such a lovesick puppy!” Annabelle teases as Y/n rolls her eyes, sauntering back over to her friends.

“You’re the same with Tom.” she retorts.

The four of them decide to play Uno flip, getting too competitive for how high they were getting. It was about an hour later when there was a knock on the door, Y/n got up quickly, wanting to see Todd. She opens it, to see him, she squeals, darting forward to wrap her arms around his neck and hide into him.

Todd jolts with the force of the hug, snorting, as his hand rubs at her back, he guides her back into the apartment. Which lets Tom and Robert follow them inside, as Annabelle comes over to greet her boyfriend with a smile and tired limbs as she wraps her arms around his waist.

“God, you two are so pussy whipped.” Jordan laughs, as the guys roll their eyes, Todd pulls away from Y/n to set down ingredients on the table, but she stays close, he’s never seen her things clingy before.

Angel sits on the couch, minkily, looking over at Rob with a little grin. Which was not like Angel at all, the ever confident person, even with sexual conquests, Angel knew what they wanted and how to get it. Robert made them feel all types of things that they couldn’t quite explain. He smiles over at them, coming over with non-chalant movements, before sitting next to Angel to begin chatting.

It kinda felt like a little family, and Y/n can’t help but want to cuddle into her boyfriend. Tom helps Annabelle scoop up her ice cream, eating some of hers cause he kinda likes vegan food. Todd makes the rest of the sundaes, along with getting the candy opened for Annabelle before dishing them all out, then they all sit together in the living room to watch a movie.

She winds up on the couch with Todd, halfway sitting in his lap as eats ice cream, giving him some spoonfuls. He had that glimmer of affection in his eyes, like he wasn’t just as content as she was, but happy. Little moments like these made them feel so affectionate and blissful.

As it gets late, Angel takes Rob back to their room, Todd gets Y/n up to go to her bedroom, while Jordan makes himself comfortable on the couch, Tom and Annabelle taking the bed. No one knew what Angel and Robert were up to but it had been about an hour when everyone decided to go to bed. The original plan of cramping into the living room changed as Todd led Y/n to her room.

Y/n was tired, leaning in to him as he helps her get into bed, he takes off his shirt and pants before crawling in next to her. “Thank you for coming over tonight.” she smiles, reaching her hand out for his waist, as one of his arms slithers underneath her, bringing her in close. “You really didn’t have to.”

“Hmm, I meant it when I said I missed you more, I wanted to see you.” Todd hums, kissing her forehead as his hand rubs against her back.

She moves her head to rest against his shoulder, she cups his face, leaning to kiss his lips softly. He sighs into her mouth, the two of them slowly kissing, not meaning to go anywhere. But his hands trail to feel her, she loves the way he touches her.

Then he accidentally rubs a finger against a sensitive place on her ribs, making her giggle and squirm a little. “Todd-.” then his fingers begin to wriggle more adamantly against her sides as she begins to laugh loudly, “S-stop! We’re-we’re gonna wake everyone up!” she chokes out the words, as he smiles wide at her.

“M’so so sorry,” he teases, he can’t help the small laugh that falls out of his mouth, soothing his palms against her before gently kissing once more.

Eventually they fall asleep, she nuzzles her face into his neck and clings her body around him.

---

For the next big game, Todd decides to give her his jersey, it was the end of the first season. She was excited to wear his ninety three jersey, the two growing closer every single day, in love, but now things were coming together. Not just for her but for Angel too, apparently that night they all slept over. The two stayed up all night, talking, Angel’s never sat down just to talk with a guy for so long-unless it was Jordan. But this was completely different, they weren’t technically together, but the two walked hand in hand.

Nina, her mother, decides to come to the game, sitting with Y/n and her friends, she waves over to Todd, as her mom asked, “Does your dad know about you two?”

“I don’t know, I assumed Todd told him, that’s not…stuff we talk about.”

“You don’t just bring it up?”

“Dad and I, we don’t talk about much.” she shrugs, before focusing in on the game.

Halfway through the game Mitch, who was on suspension and was called to play last second, just to roughly push Todd right into the wall. Todd seemed pissed but he didn’t react, just trying to gain his bearings. Both of them were put in the penalty box, though Todd was in there to be checked on because he hit his head really hard. She’s worried about him, trying to see if she could spot her dad in the crowd to get any answer. Tim just gives her a thumbs up in reassurance, when their eyes meet and sees the panic written all over her face.

But he’s back on the ice a few minutes later, while Mitch was permanently benched until the end of the game-who knew what would happen after that. He could only push his luck so far until he ran out of it.

Todd scores the last shot, winning the end season game, the crowd erupting in cheers, she rises from her spot with her best friends, hollering. He finds her in the seats with a big smile on his face, he skates over to her, opening one of the doors. He flips up his visor before leaning over to kiss her on the lips, as she smiles, cupping his cheeks, “You did so good out there.”

“Thanks, baby, had my lucky charm.” he hums, pecking her lips once more before skating off towards the post game cordial handshakes-which he noticed Mitch was not a part of, and coach Tim had disappeared.

He doesn’t take too long, quickly showering before he comes out of the tunnel to find her. He wraps his arms around her, holding her tightly, gently lifting her off the ground before setting her back down. She takes his face in her hands as she softly kisses him, “I’m so proud of you,” gazing up into his eyes like she had nowhere else to look.

Coach Tim shows up out of nowhere it seems, “You did good, Stevens.” he greets, as Y/n pulls away from Todd not all the way, still in his embrace. “You proud of your guy, hon?”

“Hmm, I am.” she smiles, as Todd pauses for a moment, then the realization crosses his features. “What?”

“Your coach’s daughter?”

“She is,” Tim humors, “I thought tomorrow you could come over for brunch, the four of us.”

Distracted by someone else before, Y/n’s mother approaches, “Yes, Todd, and you did so well out there!” she smiles over at him.

“That sounds good,” Todd nods slowly, swallowing deeply as he glances over at Y/n with alarm in his eyes.

“Okay, we’ll see you later, we got a party to get to.” Y/n said, waving them off, kissing her mom on the cheek before following after Todd.

“Why didn’t you tell me coach is your dad?” he whispers.

“I thought you knew! I thought it was common knowledge, especially for the team captain.” She mocks, lightly, leaning into his ear, keeping her voice low. He can’t help but smile as they weave through the crowd, his palm at her back, she leans into him. Then he leads her to the beginning of the tunnel to the locker room.

“Why did you tell your dad we’re going to a party?” Todd pauses, searching her face.

A devilish grin breaks out across her face, “I didn’t want him to know what we were actually going to do.” she teases, before her demeanor changes as she moves to step away, “I’ll meet you outside, at our spot. Talk to you about dad, and everything…”there was this look on her face, like something changed, so he just nods, kissing her forehead before walking backwards with a lingering grin on his face-looking at her like he couldn’t take his eyes off of her.

Todd’s worried about her, because there had to be something off, she wouldn’t just not bring it up, it was her dad? She spoke to him about everything, laying in bed together, walking hand in hand around campus, making her breakfast or taking her out for lunch or dinner.

But she didn’t like talking about family trauma, specifically, friends, brief past relationships, he’s learned about the whirlwinds and tribulations of them all. Family was a weak spot, he wasn’t going to poke at it, she would tell him when she’s ready.

Y/n waits out by the cherry tree with Angel, Rob, and Jordan who tagged along to the event with Annabelle and Tom. She didn’t bring up what happened, she was going out to dinner with the group, and she was eager to be close to him. Angel knew the full story, they’ve always been really supportive of her no matter what she did, "It's not my thing to control you, I just wanna be here.” So that's how they went about their friendship and it was one of the strongest Y/n had, aside from Jordan and now Todd-that relationship is the deepest of all.

Todd comes out in a spare jersey that matches her own, she comes over to him, “Ugh, I love you so much.” she said, wrapping her arms around his neck as his hands came around her waist. He grins down at her with a slight double chin, completely absorbed, she moves to close the space and kiss him gently.

“I know you’re my biggest fan.” he taunts, playfully, she rolls her eyes but doesn’t deny, “I love you too,” then she hides face into his neck to hug him close.

Rather than just going back to Y/n’s dorm, they make plans to go out to a local Applebees, Todd drives the two of them alone, they don’t speak at first, he likes to have some time to come down from the adrenaline of the game. It made him jittery, a bit unfocused, sometimes irritated, only for a few minutes, but once he could collect himself he felt like a whole new man. He holds her hand across the middle console, rubbing his thumb along her knuckle.

It’s good to spend time with friends, especially the seven of them, it just felt natural, Gettys shows up outside-so Todd invites him too. Jordan kinda lingers near him, not trying to be weird, but chatting, being friendly, Gettys didn’t seem to mind.

When they get to the restaurant, Y/n can’t explain how good it felt to cozy into Todd’s side, in a booth with her friends. There was light banter around the group, something that just naturally transpired. Todd would lean in to whisper little things in her ear, making her giggle, or reassuring her when her knee started to jump.

Looking around the table, a part of Todd was going to miss this next year, he would still help as alumni but he would be free. He would stay around for Y/n as long as she wanted him to, he would go wherever she did. Though he knew she was graduating in the late summer, they didn’t really talk much more about it. But he wanted to, he wanted to plan everything with her.

She’s been mulling over what to say, not quite there, on the drive home she begins to divulge, “I’m sorry I didn’t really talk about my dad.”

“You don’t have to be sorry, I was just surprised…kinda confused.” he shrugs, squeezing her hand as she chews on her lip, her free hand traces along the one clasped in her own.

“I don’t know…he always put hockey first, mom was always in and out of jobs, he needed to be the stable one, he needed the extra hours. That’s just never changed, she has mental health issues, struggles to stay sober and stable and I love her so much. But it’s hard sometimes, she’s one of my best friends but sometimes it felt like she relied on me and I know my dad works for her but when I was younger he was not a good husband. I don’t know if it’s the stress of all her issues or what, I think they are better but it's like he wants nothing to do with me. I’m at the same college as him and we don't even talk. Which might be normal but…I miss him and it’s like he’s always surprised to see me, like he forgot I even existed. I just…it’s not the first time, my mom used to take care of me, while my dad was out all day, every night til late. He always avoided us and just…that never changed.” she rambles, tears falling down her cheeks as she sighs, voice cracking, “It’s just hard to talk about…”

“Thank you for telling me,” he said, flicking on his turn signal to park in front of her dorm. “I didn’t know that, he’s always been a pretty good coach.”

“I think that the best thing he’s done, and making me tutor you so,” she smiles over at him, keeping his hand in hers, she looks down, “He always knew I had a crush on you and thought it might be a good idea. It’s the most he’s cared…”

“You’ve always had a crush on me?” he gaped, she can’t help the twitch at the side of her lips, meeting his vibrant blue eyes, he had the same grin on his face.

“You know I have.”

“I totally thought you hated me in the beginning.”

“Oh I did, you pissed me off, shattered my perfect image of you. I fought with my dad about tutoring you again, I wasn’t going to until you showed up…I knew it was because you had no other option but still.”

“I had a choice in helping you when you were sick, and when I said I liked you from the moment you told me off, I’m not lying. Even if you’re actually the stalker.” Todd admits, as she shakes her head, softly with humor.

“Are you coming up?”

“If you want me too.” he hums, as she gives him a look.

“What do you think?” she whispers, leaning across the space to fit her mouth to his in a slow lingering kiss. She doesn’t part from him, but her tongue peaks out to lick the seam of his lips, his hand coming to the back of her head.

“Hmm, I think I should’ve brought my knee pads.” one of his arms circling around her to press her chest to his, Todd wished there wasn’t a console between them. He just always wanted her on top of him or under.

“Oh my god,” she snorts, gently shoving him away as she laughs.

He comes up with her, once the front door closes, he turns around, grasping on to her hips before pressing her up against it,“You look so hot in my jersey.” he husks, placing soft kisses against her throat, as she tilts her head back for him, “Wanna see you in only my jersey.” She shivers underneath his touch, one hand pressing to his hair, while he sucks on a particular spot that makes her weak in the knees.

Her eyes flutter shut, “Okay, wait-wait out here, I’ll open the door,” she stutters, grinning, before slipping away from him and into the bedroom.

She strips off her clothing, along with the jersey, leaving herself in her lace panties because she wanted to show off. The way Todd worships her body drives her crazy, she wanted him to see her, she wanted the thrill he gave her when he kissed or touched her. Intimacy issues weren’t gone, but were able to be melted into hot evaporating wax from his softness, from the heat of his lips and words.

She remembers when he first saw her bare breasts, how he took his time, kissing, licking, biting. Trying to suck out all the insecurities, try to be enough to make her feel beautiful. Even if it wasn’t always permanent, she felt it in those moments when he worshiped her, and how he loves is what matters-not trying to solve anything. But making her feel sexy, loved, absolutely free knowing that he wanted her completely.

Y/n throws back on the jersey, taking her hair out of the ponytail and opening her door to peak her head out. “Come in…” she slowly opens the door to give him a peak, he’s never moved so fast in his life, making sure to twist the lock.

Todd wraps his arms around her waist, attacking her mouth with his hands sliding down to take her ass in his palms. She moans into his mouth, looping her arms around his neck, one hand sliding into his freshly washed hair, an extra fluffy quality about it. He rubs his hips into hers, she pulls back to whisper against him, “Let’s have sex.”

“What?” he breathes, shakily, one of his hands coming to cradle the back of her head.

“I want to, can we?” she asked, searching his eyes, as he hesitates, searching her face with that concerned frown.

“Are you sure?”

She hums, “Yeah.” gently kissing his lips, he leads her back onto the bed, hovering over the top of her. Her hands come to tug off his shirt to reveal his freckled torso, her palms clutching at his waist before moving to memorize the line of his muscles. Every part of him is so perfect.

Todd’s hand comes down between them to press against the gusset of her panties. He slowly strips his jersey off her skin, to reveal her bare tits that make his cock ache. He takes them into his hand, pressing his face against them before kissing over to each nipple. Taking one into his mouth with a satisfying pop, before switching to the other and kneading the opposite.

Her hips jerk up into the air, knees closing in as he sits between them. Todd grins before slipping one of his hands back down to her panties. “Gotta get you ready first.”

“Can't believe I get to have you.” he groans, tugging her panties down her hips. He lets his lips linger along her skin as he goes down further to take them off of her.

Her wet core is revealed in the light, completely splayed out for him, so perfect. Todd can't help but dive in, he wasn't planning on using his mouth but she looks so good, so wet for him. He felt greedy as he brought his fingers up to stretch out her tight cunt, knowing it would feel better to properly prepare her for his length.

The idea of him filling her makes her clutch around the finger he pushes inside of her. Long, thick as it curls against her walls to hit that spot inside of her that made heat burn.

“Todd,” she moans, head dropping back against the pillow as his tongue lulls at her clit before sucking it into his mouth.

“You're so good for me.” he rasps, before humming into her sensitive pearl that makes her buck into him in desperation. His free hand pressing her back down onto the bed before skating up for a palmful of her tit.

She melts into the bed underneath him as he adds another digit, his middle, thrusting them in and out. It felt so intense whenever she opened her hazey eyes she was met with Todd devouring her. Hair a tangled mess from her hand, the strong expanse of his freckled broad shoulders. Her heels gently pressing into his scapula’s as she arches her back, crying out, as he removes his mouth to shush her.

“Be quiet, every one can hear you.” he teases, before latching his lips on to her to become even more ruthless with his tongue.

He carefully riles up her, moving with heat, slowing down before going harder deeper, just teasing her with long strokes of his slender fingers. Todd kitten licks her clit before sucking her into his mouth and tracing circles that make the knot in her stomach tighter. He can tell by the way she tenses up that she’s close, he continues the ministrations that hit just right, the pleasure deliberate before she falls apart. Shuttering underneath him, pussy trembling around his fingers, wetness soaking his hand.

Todd licks her up before rising between them, stripping off his boxers, moving over to the bed side table where he knew she had stocked up on condoms. He slips the latex on to his hard shaft before lining himself up with her, mouth clicking together slowly. “Are you ready?”

“Yes, please.” she whines, grasping on to him tight, as he sighs before sinking inside of her.

“Oh fuck-.” Todd curses, one of his hands grabbing at the comforter beside her head. “You feel so good, Y/n/n, Jesus Christ.” Her hands move along his back muscles to feel them tremble in her grasp as he takes his time before bottoming out, he groans.

He pauses to let her adjust to him, his hand moves to pet her hair, gazing down into her eyes with heavy blue ones. His pubic bone rubs into hers to allow for some friction but not to hurt her, which pulls a whimper out of her. Todd’s hair falls in front of his forehead, he continues to just grind, as she pulls down his face to kiss his lips.

“I love you, Todd.” Y/n moans, while he slowly circles his hips, adding more pressure, “More,” she begs, hand grabbing at his ass to guide him as he pulls out half way to push forward.

Todd couldn’t believe she said it when she had, even now, his love running profoundly deep, she was his everything. He doesn’t know what he would do if he ever lost her, if he ever did something to fuck this up. There’s a part of him that is terrified, that part ruts into her harder, jaw grinding with exertion.

His strong shoulders making her feel so small underneath him, her head throws back as his hips begin to clap against hers. “Y/n-.” her hands move along his back, tugging him in with each thrust.

Then he drops his chin down, looking at her with awe on his face, her head in the clouds, eyes raking down her beautiful luscious body. He’s never wanted anything more, the feeling of her sweet cunt wrapped around him was heaven. Todd couldn’t compare this to anything, no one was her, no one would be her.

“It feels so good, Todd.” she whines.

---

Todd went back over to his place to get ready in the morning, he didn't have what he wanted to wear and he needed a proper shower. Later around ten, he picks Y/n up at the dorm in his car, he doesn’t say much, his knee jumping on the way to her childhood home.

“Baby, it's gonna be okay.” she hums, taking his hand in hers, lacing their fingers together. “My mom is gonna love you and Dad does too. It's why he pushed me so much to help you. He’s just testing you and whether you pass or fail, I love you and I chose you.”

“You chose me?” he smiles, bringing the back of her hand to his mouth. “I like that.”

“Why?” she giggles, the giddy expression on his face making her feel light.

“Makes me feel special, like I’m worth something.” he confesses, focusing on the road with his eyes, where his heart was somewhere else.

“You're worth so much to me, Todd, it's gonna be great.” she assures, as he pulls up the curb, he parks before turning to her.

“I love you and I chose you too.” he said, leaning to kiss her lips softly, she smiles over at him before she moves to get out of the car.

Not knowing the full extent of what that meant for her too. She never felt that way in her life, like enough, she always tried. But with him, she didn't have to try, she could just be herself and he expected her in any way she came. She just remembers being the kid who was lagging behind everyone else, who just wanted someone to like her.

Todd meets her as she gets out, taking her hand as she leads him to the front door.

She enters the house with him trailing in behind her, her parents in the kitchen that was left of the doorway. It wasn’t a big house, enough room for the three of them, an upstairs with two bedrooms, one of them a master. Their bathroom was down stairs through the hall to the right of the living room. Her mother stands behind the kitchen island, slicing tomatoes as dad stands at the stove.

“Just in time! We’re almost done.” Nina said with a smile, as Tim moved to grab some plates out of the cabinets. “Hey there Todd!”

Y/n walks over to help while Todd stands awkwardly on the other side of the kitchen island, he drums his hands against the marble. “Uh, thanks for having us.” Todd smiles, as both of her parents turn to him with a nod.

“It’s good to have you over,” Tim hums, dipping his chin, Todd was terrified there would be scrutiny, a watchful eye, especially after what he put Y/n through.

“Yes, Y/n used to go on and on about you, now I get to meet you in the flesh.” Nina muses, as Y/n gives her wide eyes, shaking her head behind Todd, as he turns to look at her with amusement.

“Really? She gave me a hard time in the beginning.” he states.

“Yeah because you were flunking and expecting her to pass you.” Tim retorts, “Seems like you’re the one who was giving her a hard time.”

Todd ducks his chin down as Y/n rounds the counter to set the table, handing him silverware, “Help me.” she nods, leading him into the dining room, “You okay?” she teases, nudging him with her elbow as he rolls his eyes.

“Yeah,” he sighs, leaning in to kiss her cheek, lowering his voice, “Just nervous.”

She smiles at him, searching his face, setting down the last plate before her hand comes to his shoulder. “You’re doing great, it’s kinda cute actually.” dropping down her palm to rub at his back.

Once they are sitting at the table the tension is a little higher, only for Todd it was his coach, he was dating his coach's daughter. If it hadn’t officially set in, it certainly did now. But of course it didn’t go as he expected.

Tim begins, “Aren’t you proud of your guy, Y/n?”

“I am,” she smiles, growing a bit nervous because her parents had a knack for embarrassing her. Her hand comes to his thigh, squeezing, moving to linger on his knee, his palm comes over hers.

“Todd, we haven’t even begun to tell you how much Y/n adored you! She begged her father for a season pass so she could see you.”

“I like hockey, mom.”

“You would specifically say it’s because you wanted a front row seat to Todd, you got your own personal fan girl.” Tim jokes, as Y/n hand comes up to hide her face as she sets her fork down, cheeks getting hot.

Todd affirms, “Oh really now? Angel and Jordan have said a few things here and there.” fingers splaying against her thigh for support, he just grins while looking over at her. “I didn’t know it was that serious.”

“Can we please change the topic?”

“Sometimes I wonder if that’s why Tim picked you as captain, favoritism.” Nina adds, reaching over to affectionately squeeze her husband’s hand, giving him an affectionate look that made Y/n question everything she knew about them.

Something she hasn't witnessed in a long time, her parents openly being happy. It was like it was gone for a while, and they must've found it.

Tim laughs, Y/n looks at her parents and realizes that maybe things have changed since she left home. Her mom seemed brighter, happier, closer to her father, though they knew how to put a good facade. Even if they were teasing her, it was out of love and she could tell they really did like Todd.

It drifts off into how they were both doing in school, that Y/n was on track to graduate in the early Fall. A part of her felt surprised when her mom said she was so proud of her. Todd kept looking at her with stars in his eyes, proud of how smart she is, how she was all his.

She was the reason he was going to graduate, she had woken him up to show him that he was more than what he thought he was. She taught him how to actually pause and appreciate the people around him, not just the ones he had to interact with. Not that he didn’t mean to be an asshole before, because he simply just didn’t care how he acted. There was a baseline, he is still a decent guy, he still cares about other people.

Y/n just made him care a whole lot more, made him fall in love in a short amount of time, now he knew what that word actually meant.

The dinner went well, it was easy dynamic for the four of them, Todd fits right into their family, and she wonders if he always meant to be there.

Everything had been so unexpected with Todd, she didn’t think she would fall in love with him, to how he never stopped trying but never pushed her too far. Especially not bringing him home to her family, she never thought Todd would want to go to do that. The doubt that he wasn’t fully into this was fading away to nothing.

It wasn’t that she thought she could never be loved or find it, she just didn’t want to focus on that. There was so much more to life than love, but once she began to truly feel, it became all consuming. It didn’t change the trauma she had with her parents, how she would always be hesitant even when she felt safe. Her parents were happy now, but there was a time they weren’t and a part of her now thought she was the reason.

Todd could tell she was growing more close off towards the end of dinner, as she got up to help clean. He moves forward, a hand against her back, “I’ll clean up, just go take some time, yeah?”

“Yeah…” she nods with a grateful smile, eyes darting over to her parents who went into the kitchen.

She goes up to her room while Todd brings some of the plates, heading into the kitchen.

“Where’d Y/n go?” Nina asked.

“Just went to go take a breather.” he shrugs, “Let me help out with the dishes.”

Tim hands over the sponge to the younger man as he approaches the sink, before pressing, “Is she alright?”

“I’m sure she is.” Todd hums, “You know sometimes she just needs a second.”

Nina replies, “Hmm.” as she organized the leftovers into tubs. “Do you think you’ll want leftovers?”

“Sure,” he nods.

Y/n goes upstairs towards her room, wondering the halls that had pictures along them, she remembers times where her mother tore them down. She didn’t expect to feel such intense emotions when she came home. But she supposed there was a reason she didn’t come home often, with her parents only living fifteen minutes away. They seemed happier without her. She tried to shake the thought off as she entered her childhood bedroom.

It hadn’t changed much since she left, when she first started school she would come back home because she would be homesick. Now the idea of staying overnight made her feel uneven, she thought about her birthday in the early Spring. How much it sucked to not have Todd with her during the holidays. How she wanted Todd to be there, it didn’t seem lighter to her now, but she wasn’t alone.

She sat down on her bed, chewing on her cheek as she took some deep breaths, thankful that Todd could read her before she had to say anything. Sometimes when she’s like this it takes away to get that oompf back, like a part of her was rooting into the safe and didn’t want the potential of leaving that.

Then there was a knock at the door, she raises her head to see her dad, she swallows deeply. “Hey…”

“Hey kid…” he said, leaning against the door frame with his arms crossing his chest. “You and Todd…he seems like he treats you really well.”

“He does,” she smiles, looking down at her hands, “I can’t believe you…you did all that.”

Tim jokes, “I just wanted you to tutor the guy, not fall in love with him.” she scoffs, rolling her eyes as she lifts them to her dad.

“He’s a lot different than I thought he was, he’s so…it’s like he tries because he thinks I’m really worth it.”

“You are, sweetheart, he should have to work for it.” she stares at him as her brows lift with her disbelief, she shakes her head. “What?”

“I just…haven’t heard that from you or mom. Like…I don’t know. Like I really matter. Earlier when Mom said she was proud of me…she doesn't say that, when we talk we talk about her which is great but….”

“I-I’m sorry, Y/n, I just…thought you knew, you’re our baby, you mean everything to us, to me.” Tim said, as she looked at him with tears in her eyes. “She talks to you because she misses you, she is proud of you. She's worked really hard, we have…we're going to therapy and I know I haven't been the best dad. But I’m trying, I want to be a good dad, a good husband.”

“Oh…” she trails, “Well that’s nice to know.”

Tim doesn’t say anything else, he just stares for a moment, feeling terrible, before giving her space, “I love you, Y/n/n.”

“I love you too dad.”

He sighs before turning around and walking down the hallway, she wipes away a stray tear as Todd pokes into the room. He can instantly see the sadness on her face, moving in to sit next to her on the edge of the bed. “What happened?”

“I don’t know, nothing, I just…” she puts her head in her hands, “I’m overreacting.”

“I’m sure you aren’t.” Todd reassures, reaching over for her hands, gently lifting her head to look up at him. He tangles their fingers together, his other palm spans against her cheek, “Baby.”

“He just…he told me I’m worth something..that I’m worthy for you to, have to try because I…I’m something and I just always felt like dust in the wind, I didn’t matter, I had my job, my career, because I can write but that’s…that’s all I have. You don’t have to be anything to write, you just are…” she rants, more tears streaming down her face, as his eyes rove over her face with gentle care.

“You are so worth it, not…every second has been worth it before you could trust me, and I cherish every moment after. I’ve become a better man because you make it easy. I want to be good enough for you, I knew you were way out of my league, I’m just a dumb frat guy and you’re smart, strong, the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.” Todd said with conviction, as she struggled to look into his eyes, “I love you.”

“I love you, Todd, so much.” she sighs, leaning in to connect their lips, her hand coming to the back of his neck. “Will you stay the night with me? I hate being away from you.”

“There's no other place I’d rather be.” he murmurs, “Let's get a place together this summer. I have money saved up, I’m serious about us.”

Her eyes widened, “You want that?”

“I do, I hate being away from you too. Even if you're kinda a stalker…”