who can you trust if not even yourself?

lee seonwoong. tablo. 31. memory manipulation. old man always running from the past.

[odchunhwa]

✘ lose your way ▬ ;

[...]

no looking back.

"this is fucking bullshit.

but we have choice but to go along with it—” she stated, glancing at the metal encasings caging the two— except the ones behind her. the wall that had blocked her pathway had vanished into thin air now, revealing what appeared to be an endless hallway with numerous entrances to others eating in from the sides.

"a maze … ?"

with that, sooyeon clenched her jaw as the reality of what she was actually up against finally hit her — this wasn’t just some ordinary mutant they were dealing with anymore.

"i don’t have a way out of here, yet, so we might as well just play along with this little game.

for now.”

sparing one final glance at tablo beside her, she nodded her head once again taking a step into the labyrinth— entering the maze of what had yet to be sheer hell.

[fcxtablo]

tablo's hand reached out to touch the cold surface of the wall. the feeling gave him a greater sense of the reality that enveloped them without warning and left them trapped with no definite direction to go off of. a shiver ran down his spine and he pulled his fingertips away. this definitely wasn't a dream; it was a nightmare.

he nodded at sooyeon, following next to her closely. it only took a few steps to get to the split pathways up ahead. there were six choices, all identical with no indication of what waited beyond each them. "i guess any way works, right?" taking a deep breath to calm his nerves, tablo took the initiative and stepped into the one closest to him. "stay close, we don't want to get split up."

at first, the path seemed endless as they continued to walk, the tall walls blocking out any daylight from before, and the results of finding anything worthwhile seemed desolate after only five or ten minutes.

but eventually more entrances began to appear with every twist and turn. rounding another corner brought them to a more spacious area that they haven't seen before. his footsteps almost stop instinctively at the sight. something was ... off. the walls surrounding them began to shake, the intensity gradually increasing with each passing moment. even the floor began to reverberate before --

large pieces of metal debris detached themselves from the walls and all flew at both of them at once. "s--" tablo was barely able to say sooyeon's name before wrapping an arm around her shoulders and shoving both of them flat onto the floor.

a voice resonated down the hall. "rule number two: this round, fight with your eyes closed." tablo looked up from the ground, recognizing the voice of the mutant from before. but this time, he spotted a different man standing in front of them. tiny shards of metal floated above his open hand, a sly smile on his lips.

[fcxtablo]

{` how unfortunate was it that the other girl managed to escape before he had everything set up — though it's too late for the remaining two now, the minute they had rounded the corner they had already entered his labyrinth } — {` a smile graces his lips as the debris slowly form a wall, a fake, seeing as they were already trapped, but it'll be a lot more fun if they got separated } rule number one, no looking back—or you'll be blinded. {` even better if they decide to test it out }

the second tablo opened his eyes after the fall, the small girl sobbing into his chest, a familiar and welcomed face came into view. jung sooyeon. it had been too long since they’ve caught up. not that this was any time to be doing something like that, but her sudden appearance gave him enough energy to keep going and sit up. “sooyeon, do you have soojung? jinri—?” his words were cut off as he looked around at the new event that was unfolding before his eyes. new mutants were starting to come out from the woodwork. they seemed unscathed by the destruction and the look in all of their eyes — it left tablo speechless for a moment. he gave the girl in his arms a comforting squeeze, holding her slightly closer to his chest and whispering a quick reassurance to her, “don’t worry, you’ll be out of here in no time.”

it took a few moments longer than normal but tablo was able to stand again. every bone and muscle in his body already seemed to ache. he noticed a classmate running his way, away from the incoming mutants, and called his name. the other was surprised and slowed down momentarily; tablo had never talked to him before, and he was sure the other wouldn’t recognize him. but without hesitation, he passed off the little girl into his arms. “take her. make sure she gets somewhere safe.” the boy was still confused but the unusual tone of authority in tablo’s voice made him nod regardless as he went off running again. when he glanced back over at sooyeon, he pursed his lips into a thin line, making more blood flow from the cut from earlier.

—

they had decided to try looking for the younger ones first before running, but turning the next corner had only trapped them.

rule number one, no looking back—or you’ll be blinded.

something about the way he said that… it seemed like he was being completely serious. tablo’s eyes flickered from the mutant in front of them to sooyeon beside him. he had no idea who these mutants were but it was probably best not to test them. it was obvious that there was no going back even if they wanted to escape. the newly formed wall behind them was indication enough.

"rules. what do you mean by that?" tablo spoke first, slowly, with a tensing jaw.

the other replied casually, beginning to back up as he spoke, “just that. serious consequences will happen if you don’t follow the rules.” the mutant snickered, another wall beginning to form in front of him. “remember them well. and try to get out if you can —”

and then he was gone.

tablo frowned, glancing over at his former mentor. “what do you think about this, sooyeon?”

[fcxtablo]

{` in amidst of the shouts and confusion, you hear a cry as clear as day — upon looking on the ground you spot a small child in tears, without a single thought you head toward her and shove away another to scoop her up in your arms — despite the disarray you hear a low rumbling that gradually increases in volume; a low shout is the only warning before crashes can be heard and you turn just in time to see the building to the left crumbling and tilting forward toward the two of you }

( ` tablo tugs with all his strength, trying to get jinri to follow him but he can hear jinri mumbling something about soojung — ) fu— okay, don’t worry, jinri. we’ll find her. ( ` he’s busy trying to get a clear look at everyone in the crowd — the ones running past, the ones on the ground — and every face, every expression is imprinting itself in his mind. more nightmares will come tonight, that he’s sure of, but he can’t seem to pinpoint soojung in the racing crowd. his attention immediately turns towards the source of a high pitched scream that pierces through the collective madness around them )

jinri, stay here. don’t move unless you have to. i’m serious, you hear—?

( ` the last sentence was shouted as a command, tablo placing his hands on her shoulders so she could see his grim expression. without another wasted moment, he sprints off in the direction of the girl crying on the ground alone, picking her up easily — thankfully, it didn’t look like she had any major injury — but the real danger is just coming as his face turns to the left, heart pumping and on the verge of bursting ) — ( ` his body reacts in a few milliseconds, turning back around sharply to run towards jinri. perhaps if it was just him standing there, he might’ve let himself die off in a moment of hesitation, but he wasn’t going to allow another child’s death at his hands. stray debris from the building was falling all around him. something heavy hit his back as he tried to shield the child, causing him to stumble slightly. his face was strained with pain, but fortunately he was able to clear the building just in time. but the moment he’s out, he trips over something large, falling but immediately twisting his body to let his back take the impact ) shhhh— ( ` his eyes closed tightly in pain and the child in his arms only screamed and cried louder. he needed to get back to jinri and find soojung if he could; who knew what could happen next? )

[fcxtablo]

{` ringing silence was easily broken by a scream from the crowd — just like that complete and utter chaos breaks out, people running from all sorts of directions in order to get away from the stage — though none of that matters when everything on the stage promptly explodes, debris shooting in all sorts of directions and over the screams and rushed footsteps of everyone trying to get as far away as possible — a laugh is to be heard; a declaration of a war on all of busan has begun }

( ` tablo reflexively covered jinri's head the instant the stage exploded -- the ringing in his ears still loud as he raises his head to look around, the packed area was filled with smoke and horrified faces ) jinri-yah-- ( ` he could barely feel the warm liquid that was dripping down his face, a simple cut that slashed his cheek, angled all the way down to his upper lip. keeps a tight grip on jinri, one arm wrapped around her shoulders as the screaming crowd rushed against them ) we need to get out of here, come on.

[fcxxxyejin-deactivated20140201]

adv. prog. // search and rescue

[xxxxfcsongjieun-deactivated2014]

[...]

"g-good luck! come back in one piece!" she offers them a playful salute, her cheeks tinging red at the action. with her heart beating erratically from pressure and anxiety jieun can’t help the wave of pessimism that strolls over her thoughts, despite her attempt to keep happy. 

in and out, it was that simple right? 

[fcxtablo]

tablo nodded at the confirmation, bringing up both hands to lightly place two fingers on each temple of yejin's head. "it won't take long, don't worry." recent memories are always the easiest to pinpoint and it only took a few seconds for tablo to copy the images of the map. the instant he was done, his arms retracted back down to his sides.

his expression turned more serious than the calm demeanor he wore before; the complicated layout of the building was more than he was expecting, but then again, he noted that he really should stop underestimating the simulations.

at the cue of jieun's farewell, tablo tipped the brim of his hat in a sort of salute. he took off in the other direction at the pace of a slow jog, confident that eunji was in tow as well as he rounded the corner and headed towards the gate of the facilities. when they neared the entrance, he began to walk, keeping his hat and head low to shield his face as much as possible. "eunji, stay close behind my back."

luckily, the guard in the front seemed preoccupied with an angry phone call. he simply said "scan, please," before proceeding to yell back into the phone. tablo unhooked the ID card tethered to the pocket of the uniform and reached up to swipe it. his hand hesitated for a moment, not knowing which way to slide the card, but the guard had already taken it out of his hands and verified him with an impatient expression on his face.

when he stepped in through the opening gates, tablo only hoped that eunji's entrance would go as smoothly as well.

[hotjiyongnim]

sibal

[...]

there’s a wafting smell that grounds him temporarily then, and his hands reflexively pat against the back of jeans in search for his wallet, to no avail however — “fuck, where is it?” he mutters in exasperation, thrusting his hands into pockets he’s never used before and finding nothing even after turning them inside out; not a single bill. a loud laugh then, dry and flustered, he ignores the passing looks he receives and stares in wistful longing at a student who steps up to make their purchase.

[fcxtablo]

it hadn't been long before tablo completely lost sight of jinri and soojung in the swirling sea of people that engulfed the streets of busan. but it wasn't like he was exactly keen on sticking with them for the rest of the festival. two dongsaengs of their energetic caliber plus the hundreds of other strangers that surrounded him were enough to keep his nerves on end. he couldn't remember the last time he's had so much human contact. every time he looked around, more and more unfamiliar faces were etching themselves into his memory and the feeling was similar to one of suffocation.

with the cue of his grumbling stomach, maybe he just needs some food to help him along. his feet begin to gravitate towards the strong smell of food down the street. as long as tablo breaks free from the stream of festival goers, he'll be able to catch his breath.

after a few moments, he stops in front of a row of street food stands, eyes lingering over each choice laid out before him. chewing on his bottom lip in deliberation, he steps up to the one stationed just to his right. tablo stands a few feet behind another man, unsure whether or not they're already on line. but after a few moments of watching him, it became obvious the other must've forgotten to bring any cash.

tablo takes a step to the side, with all intentions to go around him, but he catches the look on the other's face out of the corner of his eye when he passes him. he pauses momentarily before stepping up to the stand. he digs into his pocket and holds out a few thousand won. "two orders please." the food only takes a couple seconds to prepare but he hopes the man he saw earlier hadn't already left. turning around, he's rather grateful but hesitates nonetheless before approaching him.

"hey, i have two orders of this, but my friend seems to have run off. do you want the extra?"

[lyunchi]

[fcxtablo]

a brighter day

[fcxjinri-blog]

( *grinning at her phone when the second message arrives—that was exact reaction she had been hoping to garner ) 

( txt ) yessir (｡◝‿◜｡)

[fcxtablo]

[ sms to: jinri ] are you in your room? i'll come pick you up

( ` stands up from his seat in the library and stretches, his back arching gratefully and hands clasped high above his head. sunlight filters in from window next to him, and as he glances outside, he can tell there are several groups of students and couple that seem to be heading towards the same place. he would've almost missed jinri's text if he hadn't checked the time on his phone a couple minutes later. silence and reading is almost always the best remedy for tablo nowadays, but he figures it's better for him to get out every once in a while )

[fcxxxyejin-deactivated20140201]

adv. prog. // search and rescue

[xxxxfcsongjieun-deactivated2014]

[...]

"you guys are q-qualified enough in my opinion." she offers, dropping her gaze to the ground idly. "i think you’ll do just f-fine! we’ll be done in no time!" she smiles widely.

[fcxtablo]

tablo had focused too much on not getting blood on the uniforms -- he was the one tasked to strip them so he and eunji could disguise themselves inside -- that he had let the last guard slip from his grasp. he had managed to knock two of them unconscious, one in a tight, suffocating headlock while hitting the other with a swift sidekick to the head. it had been more strenuous on his body than simply using his knife to cut at vital points with agile motions, but it gotten the job done.

he trusted jieun to take care of the guard who ran past, and when he looked up after the fight was over, hands already working away at the buttons of the guard's shirt, he was reassured by a body that lied motionless a few meters from the girls. eunji had already regrouped with the other two, and tablo took this opportunity to change into the uniform he had tugged off one of the guards. luckily, one of them seemed to be pretty small compared to the rest. eunji would probably be able to pull it off, as long as she kept her own clothes on underneath.

tablo worked away at this uniform even more hurriedly than the first. when he finished, he ran back to the group to catch some last words from yejin about the map. it wasn't a problem if he missed the explanation, he just needed permission from yejin to copy her memories of the base map.

"here." he handed the extra uniform to eunji. "since they're slightly bigger, you can just pull them over your own clothes." he shifted his view slightly to look at yejin now. "do you mind if i look?" he tapped a finger to his temple. usually he would hesitate to be so forward with others, especially using his powers on them, but the adrenaline was starting to flow through him and there was obviously no time to waste. "it'll be faster than you recounting the whole thing to me anyway."

[fcxtablo]

( txt ) ...... no because your well of knowledge is a different flavour!! ⊙▽⊙ ( txt ) there's a winter festival (❁´‿`❁)*✲ﾟ**✲ﾟ* <-- snow hehe

( ` smiles to himself when he reads the first text -- saengs too sugary sweet for him stg )

[ sms to: jinri ] oh?

( ` considers feigning ignorance, but he's in the mood to put in some effort if the whole thing makes jinri happy )

[ sms to: jinri ] and are you texting me because you want to go?

[fcxtablo]

( txt ) oppa! you know what's happening today? (✌ﾟ∀ﾟ)☞ ( txt ) HERE'S A HINT (❁´‿`❁)*✲ﾟ*

[ sms to: jinri ] would it be terrible if i said i had no idea?

[followyourseoul-deactivated2025]

[fcxtablo]

smoke and wounds

[fxkris-blog]

[...]

"go for it." he eventually consents with an exhale of smoke, scooting over to make more room. it’s an unexpected decision, even to himself but hey, he blames it on the insanity of sleepless nights. surely, the other could concur. "want a light?" he asks out of courtesy, holding out the box to the elder.

[fcxtablo]

tablo doesn't expect the other to comply, but he masks his surprise well as he moves to take the open seat next to him. he keeps his hands tucked away in his pockets to keep them warm. on the other hand, his face is starting to numb with the cold. contrary to any normal reaction, he appreciates the sensation -- it gives him something else to focus on rather than his previous nightmares.

he shakes his head at the box -- "i ... don't smoke, but thanks." -- and almost immediately, he regrets it. "wait --" a hand escapes its cozy home in his jacket and reaches for the box almost automatically. suddenly the sting of the extreme cold no longer satisfies him, and he's craving another remedy that'll take his mind off of things for a while. plucking a cigarette -- somewhat clumsily -- with fingers that are already starting to lose feeling, tablo stares at it for a moment before holding it up, gently pressing it between two chapped lips.

it's been ages since he's smoked. he never exactly found it appealing, but now that he had nothing left to lose, it didn't seem like such a terrible idea. tablo looks back at kris, the lighter? question apparent in his eyes despite the dulled sense of vision.

he feels almost sorry for disturbing the other, especially since almost everyone would prefer to be alone during these times. and judging by his roommate's expression, he most certainly had demons of his own to deal with tonight.

taking the cigarette out of his mouth for a second, tablo remarks briefly, more to himself than to kris. "sometimes i forget others have nightmares, too."

[fcxxing-deactivated20140402]

i'm in danger

[fcxxing-deactivated20140402]

[...]

i have a serious proposal to give you. (* nods his head as seriously as possible, again, even though it’s evident that serious isn’t really his forte ) i decided on something really important — like, i saw you smile once and i thought wow, hyung has such a cool smile, as expected but i realized i don’t actually hear you laugh a lot and —

shhhhh!!! (* flinches, head darting around to see where that shushing came from but oh, maybe he is being a little loud, so he ducks his head a little and tries to lower his voice )

… anyways, i don’t — … where was i. smiling, laught — oh! i realize i don’t hear you laugh a lot so i started this project by myself called ‘operation: bottle tablo hyung’s laughter!!!!!’ (* pulls out the joke book from where he’s set it aside for now ) i’m going to get you to laugh fifty times by the time spring comes. (* shows him the joke book from a distance and nods, confidently ) so be prepared for the funniest jokes of your life.

[fcxtablo]

( ` already he can tell that this isn't much of an emergency. he doesn't know why, but he expects more ... fanfare and confetti, in a sense, if yixing were ever in a real emergency. but he reminds himself that he shouldn't be too surprised -- it was a shot in the dark anyway. as always, tablo goes with the flow and sits down in the chair opposite. despite his free time being interrupted, tablo always found his interactions with the other to be -- how do you say it? -- uplifting, almost )

a serious proposal, huh? ( ` tilts his head slightly, eyes narrowing a bit as he tries to get a better read on the situation from his expression. he remarks silently to himself that 'serious' really doesn't suit yixing's character before just letting the other talk away ) ... ( ` this had to do with his laughter--? he doesn't have much time to linger on the subject; his thoughts get cut off along with yixing's words )

yixing-ah ... ( ` leans forward a bit, arms crossed on the table and pressed when he puts all his weight on them. he avoids eye contact as he collects his thoughts, almost starting to feel uncomfortable with the idea. bottling his laughter? where did that idea even come from?

--

better not to question the thought processes in that boy's mind anyway. sighs a bit reluctantly, nearly giving up on resisting and sitting back in his chair instead ) it's a nice gesture, but you really don't have to do this. ( ` glances up at the joke book, a tiny amused smile tugs at one corner of his mouth ) tell you what .. if you can make me laugh at least once today, i'll let you do this. call?

[yuuki5523375-deactivated2015080]

[fcxtablo]

memories of spring

[fcxjinri-blog]

[...]

“breathe jinri,” she murmured to herself, marching straight over to the man and taking in another, quick inhalation before spurting, “hi!  i’m… i’m jinri and i think i know you and i wouldn’t be surprised if you forgot me or what i looked like if i’m right because that happens you know and it’s been ten years—a whole decade!—so i suppose that would the normal course of action!”

the smile on her face froze with sheer horror—what was the verbal diarrhea that had just spewed right out of her mouth?—before taking in a breath because dear goodness, the redhead had long ran out of it.  not knowing what else to say, she gave him her best smile.

“do i need to say that again, or did you catch me?”  

[fcxtablo]

"i think i know you --"

her words halted tablo's own thoughts. her memory was almost too impressive. what were the chances that an eight year old girl would remember a plain guy she met once upon a time? on top of that, calculate the chances that their paths would cross again at a place like this, which also happens to be in a different country than the one they first encountered each other.

the universe was funny. very funny.

"no need." his almost dazed expression fades, a warm smile replacing the slight frown that perpetually sat on his face. the action felt natural, unstrained for the first time in a long time. he could feel seonwoong nudging at the back of his mind; he wanted to talk to jinri. he wanted to laugh with her like old times. she still perfectly resembled the cute, precocious girl he knew back then, and he wondered how her studies have come along since then.

"i actually have a great memory. uh --" tablo slides down the bench a bit, making room for one more person. he motions to the spot next to him, raising a questioning brow. he didn't know if she had other plans yet he hoped she could at least sit for a few minutes.

"i remember you very well, jinri. believe it or not." he smiles a bit wider, nostalgia beginning to seep into his heart. "i'm surprised you remember me. but then again, you were always pretty smart."

since when did he start grinning?

[fcxxxyejin-deactivated20140201]

adv. prog. // search and rescue

[xxxxfcsongjieun-deactivated2014]

[...]

As time ticks down, sweat perspires on her brow, and her throat begins to close up. She’s nervous — she can’t fail this; she can’t let her team down. She shuts her eyes for a moment, and with one more deep inhale — she purses her lips and stares forward, firm and rigid. 

Two minutes left; let the countdown begin.

[fcxtablo]

Squinted eyes looking up at the round, bare sun, Tablo stands idly near the group, yet farthest from his comrades. 

"Thirty second until the guards."

At this cue, Tablo releases his gaze from the sky and blinks as he looks around at the others. Beginnings are always the hardest. Even if you've cultivated your powers to an extent before coming the Institute, the first few missions in the simulation room are always hell on the nerves. At this point, Tablo has been able to train his body to remain calm until his adrenaline rush is actually needed. There have been countless failed and successful tasks experienced in the past two years; Tablo takes each one as a chance to grow, rather than worry about the result. Yet he still feels an inkling of responsibility in the back of his mind to help his intermediate counterparts pass this test at any cost.

Eyes locking onto the one who seems the most nervous -- Song Jieun, was it? -- he takes a step closer and begins to raise his arm. His hand hesitates, hovering over her shoulder for a brief moment, before resting on it gently. "Don't get too anxious before we've even begun. Let's make this a good run, alright?"

He keeps his gaze on the point where the guard will come from. He lets his hand fall from Jieun's shoulder. "Stay by Yejin." Tablo glances over his shoulder, signaling to Eunji to come meet the guard with him. His fingers reach into his pocket and wrap around the cool metal of his switchblade. "Let's not spend too much time on this, Eunji."

As they jog towards the corner that would reveal the oncoming guard, Tablo has faith that they won't have any problems with teamwork. He's only worked with her one or twice before in the training rooms, but Eunji was more than decent at matching his next moves.