things we don't talk about

[februarythoughts]

why did i think you would be different this time

[februarythoughts]

i don’t want to cause a problem but i genuinely don’t think you would do anything for me if i didn’t tell you to. 

[februarythoughts]

college

in college a lot of people feel like the only thing to do to make memories is to go out. to get drunk. to forget the night before. it took me a long time, and i’m honestly still working on it, to get to a point where it doesn’t bother me that i don’t enjoy that kind of thing. that i won’t have a “typical” college experience. i often feel less than, or that i am missing out on something, even though, if i did go out i wouldn’t enjoy it. it’s a tough place to be in. but i’m slowly becoming comfortable with myself and owning who i am as a person. other people’s definition of fun does not have to be mine. and my college experience is unique to me. it doesn’t matter what other people do or even what they think i should or shouldn’t do. ultimately, i’m the one who has to live with the consequences and really, no one cares as much as i think they do.