An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
Summary:
When an unkempt, handsome stranger stumbled into Viktor's office he knew he had to do one thing: Figure out what was going on. Failing that, he had to do another: Climb him like a tree.
~
"I … I-I can't", he stuttered, breathy voice muffled by his own hands, "I can't, I … can't do this … not to…"
"What…", Viktor began, unsure what to make of this. Then he saw broad shoulders twitch upwards, heaving rhythmically as the stranger's body was wracked with deep, desperate sobs.
"Ehh…" He was frozen, watching the man cry on his office floor. Large hands rubbed at misty eyes, pressed against grimy skin, dragged through tangled hair as fat tears rolled down his face and a blotchy flush spread across his cheeks. It was a heart-achingly pathetic sight that went on and on and Viktor, despite his confusion, could not help but be moved by it.
Your jayvik fic (once more, with feeling) is fucking INCREDIBLE. Dear God. I'm reading it currently instead of visiting with family for Christmas LMAO
This is such sweet message, thank you so much for hopping over here and sending it! I am having an amazing time working on that fic and I am so happy you're enjoying it so much! Jayvik fic is a very valid way to spend Christmas lmao I mean I wrote half of that chapter on Christmas eve, had dinner with the family, then edited and posted it afterwards, we are holding hands here! Enjoy this special gift, from me, to you
Fuck... I recently read your newest fanfic Jayvik (Once more, with Feeling) and I'm soooo fascinated, you write so fucking well!! I can't wait to read more of them!!! AAAAAAAAAAA <333
Ahh thank you so much for reaching out, this really means a lot! I'm having way too much fun with this concept and fic, more will be coming soon! Can't wait to have Jayce destroy his sweet younger Viktor 😌
The words, brimming with promises of danger and helpless struggle, sent another hot shudder down Chilchuck's spine.
"Yes", he breathed, mind flipping excitedly through ideas. "Want to be all alone with you, try to run and struggle and scream ... out in the woods, maybe. You could chase me a bit, hunt me down and then ravage me..."
Laios' eyes flashed at that, fingertips digging deeper into Chilchuck's skin, breath deepening.
"You want that?", he asked, voice low and deep as he shifted minutely. "Get away, maybe think you've made it just in time ... only for me to find you again and take what I want after all?"
"Mhh, you could even punish me ... for trying to get away from you...", Chilchuck added, coming up with all new ideas, now that they were spinning this tale together. Laios' eyes widened and he licked his lips.
"P-punish you how?"
Oh, so he liked that idea, judging by the breathless wonder in his voice. Chilchuck grinned, leaning in to ghost his lips against Laios' ear.
"Spank me, maybe. Or choke me. Or maybe ... maybe make me come."
"What?" The word was low and incredulous, Laios' cock twitching against his own as Chilchuck rolled his hips again.
"Ah, can't you imagine? I'm struggling and screaming so much, trying to get away from you ... so you hold me down and make me come just to prove how much a hypocrite I am, how badly I want it..."
"Gods, Chil..."
"Would leave me so sensitive as well, for anything else you want to do to me. I'd be a helpless, whimpering mess before you know it..."
A large hand came up to cup the back of Chilchuck's head, pulling him close as Laios shivered violently.
"Oh Chil, you want me to do that to you, yes?", he whispered, heated and needy, as his hips rolled up against Chilchuck's with more force. "Make you come so hard you're screaming and taunt you for it? Call you a greedy, little thing and tell you I'll give you what you need?"
Then there was a long, deep breath and a shuddering exhale as Laios stilled underneath him, then allowed Chilchuck more room to move again.
"Alright", he mumbled, "I think I can do that but, uhm ... I need to know some more things."
"Oh yeah?", Chilchuck asked, amused, as he leaned back to look at Laios. "Like what?"
"Like ... uhm, what's the story, I suppose? Am I myself? Do we know each other? What's ... going on?"
Chilchuck took a moment to ponder, playing with the different options until something felt right.
"You're definitely not yourself. You wouldn't do something like that to me, not even in a fantasy. And I ... don't think I want to know you. I think it'd be more intense if you were a stranger. But maybe ... you know me a little? Maybe you watched me? Waiting for your chance..."
Laios nodded quickly, breaths consciously slow and deep.
"Yes, that works ... I've been watching you ... and now I find you all alone in the woods ... or maybe I stalked you, followed you there..."
"Hmm, guess I'll never know", Chilchuck grinned, running the fingers of one hand through the buzzed, blond hair at the back of Laios' head. "Anything else you need to know?"
Another pause as Laios breathed slow and deep, eyes never leaving Chilchuck's.
"Yes", he finally said, somewhat more steady. "If we really want to do this ... and we don't have to but ... but I'd really like to ... uhm, I need to know how to keep you safe." He paused when Chilchuck just frowned up at him at that, then hurried to add: "I mean ... I don't want to accidentally do something you don't like so we need to talk about what you don't want to happen. And you need a way to stop me. A signal or something. If ... if it becomes too much."
Chilchuck hummed and nodded, leaning back a bit more, hands coming to rest on Laios' shoulders.
"Yes, you're right. I need some time to think about it, if that's alright? I mean there's some obvious stuff but ... I don't want to forget anything."
"Of course, yeah."
"And as for the signal ... well, I can't just tell you to stop, that's true..." Chilchuck was still thinking about a good kind of code when Laios piped up with an idea.
"Back when ... I played guards and bandits ... I would just call for a timeout when I needed a break?"
Chilchuck noticed the small hiccup to the words and quietly grinned to himself. Laios really was trying his best here.
"That should work. And if for some reason I can't talk ... I can give you a signal holding my hand up like this?", he suggested, holding up one hand with the thumb and pinky tucked into the palm so only the three fingers in the middle were still stretched out. I was a simple enough gesture he would be able to make even if his coordination was not the best anymore.
"You just need to make sure I can always either speak or use my arm. What do you think?"
Laios nodded, slow and thoughtful.
"Yes ... yes, I think that works for me."
"Anything else you want to know?"
Another pause, this time longer as Laios seemed to ponder their conversation.
"Right now ... just one more thing", he finally hummed, voice dipping lower as he took up the smooth roll of his hips again. "Do you still want me to take off my breeches?"
They ended up late to the meet-up with the others but Chilchuck did not mind. Not when he could still hear Laios' heated whisper:
"I will make you beg for mercy, Chil, and never show you any."
...I was wondering if I could perhaps send in a request/idea for a chilaios fic, and if so is there any kinks that are hard off limits? Don't think it's too extreme but just checking. I'm really enjoying your cnc fic :^) I looooooove a service top 💕
Hello there, anon! Thank you so much for the sweet message, I'm happy you're enjoying the fic so far!
I love receiving requests, so feel free to send them in any time! I can't promise I'll get to them very soon cause I'll be working on my current fic for quite a while ... but some ideas what to write after that will definitely be appreciated!
As for kinks I'd say the more extreme ones like emeto, scat, necro, noncon outside the boundaries of consensual roleplay ... I'm sure there's more but you can just send in your idea and I'll let you know if it's anything I'm not comfortable or won't have fun writing. I'm really looking forward to your request!
(hi sorry to bother may i please ask that you consider tagging Not Safe For Work [sexual content, gore if any] fics with #nsfw)
(for filter reasons, for people who would rather not such as minors, trauma fellas, and so forth)
(maybe also #fic but that's probably the far less contentious part)
(thanku)
Hi anon, thank you for the message! It's not a bother at all and of course you're absolutely right!
I used to tag my content way more extensively with all the specifics ... it's just that doing that today basically purges them from every tag, which kind of defeats the purpose of posting at all, you know? On the other hand I think it is important that people who don't want to see certain content don't have to ... so I'll be returning to our collective roots and tag everything explicit #lemon from here on out. I hope that's a compromise that works for both sides. Also please always feel free to outright block me if you don't want to see my works pop up! Thanks again for your input, I appreciate it a lot.
"Tell me more, Chil. Tell me about all the ways you want me to use you." The low rumble of his voice left the hairs along Chilchuck's neck prickling in the best way.
"I want you ... to use my mouth", he admitted after a short breath, still not able to look up again. "Want you to stuff it full ... and fuck it ... and barely let me breathe. No matter how much I squirm and whine..."
Laios reached up with one hand then, brushing curious fingertips against Chilchuck's lips who opened up willingly. Two fingers pushed into his mouth, salty sweet, pressing down against his tongue and sliding all the way to the back of Chilchuck's throat.
"Like this?", Laios asked as he pushed deeper, slowing down as Chilchuck gagged around the intrusion. But not stopping. Allowing him to get used to the pressure, to relax the back of his throat. "Hmm, yes. You love it when I force your throat open with my cock. Do you want to be all nice and spread out for me? With your head hanging off the edge of the bed so I can use your mouth?"
Chilchuck let out a heated whimper that was cut short when Laios pushed his fingers deeper, sliding them right down Chilchuck's throat. He gagged again, the sound of it wet and desperate.
"Do you want to get all light headed when I decide I need relief more than you need air?"
Chilchuck felt himself throb hard and heavy and he could swear he was already getting light headed even though it had barely been a few seconds. With how close they were pressed together Laios must have felt him twitch and he rolled his hips up into Chilchuck's again, pressing their hard lengths together.
The fingers remained where they were for a moment longer, almost long enough to make Chilchuck's heart flutter with an edge of panic, before he pulled them back out, slow and careful. Thick spit was clinging to them, drawing strands between the fingertips and Chilchuck's lips as he coughed, eyes watery and hands shaking.
"Fuck, Laios", he croaked and then watched, wide eyed and frozen, as Laios sucked the fingers between his own lips to gleefully clean Chilchuck's spit away. The sight made his stomach lurch and his cock twitch again. Laios only hummed, smacking his lips as he was finished.
"What else do you want, Chil?", he asked, as if any of this was normal. "Do you want to struggle? Try to escape and find out you can't?"
Their hips had taken up a steady rocking movement by now, grinding together in slow, even motions. For a moment Chilchuck was caught in the teasing grind and the image Laios' words painted for him. Imagined himself squirming and kicking, imagined Laios holding him down with ease. Then his eyes focused again, confused.
"Wait ... why are you so good at this? How do you know that?"
As if having been caught a cheeky smile snuck onto Laios' lips and the feverish heat dusted across his face and down his neck darkened.
"Ah ... well you're not the only one wondering what it would be like ... to be held down by someone ... something ... much larger and stronger than yourself..."
For a moment those words just hovered between them as Chilchuck blinked up at Laios. Then everything fell into place. Of course. He almost laughed, giddy relief flooding his body, replacing the cowering remains of doubt and shame. If there was anyone uniquely equipped to understand just what Chilchuck wanted out of this it had to be Laios. At the same time a shudder ran down his spine, his cock throbbing heavy where it rubbed up against Laios' through the fabric.
Reaching down with one hand he began unbuttoning Laios' breeches.
"Take them off right now."
But instead of following the demand the way Laios usually did when they fell into bed together, large hands came down to cover his own, stopping the motions.
"I ... I'd love to", Laios stammered, breathless and still deeply flushed when Chilchuck looked up at him in confusion. "But I ... also really want to talk about this. And I don't want you to say anything you'll regret, like last night. So maybe ... maybe we shouldn't..."
Chilchuck fell entirely still at those words, staring at Laios incredulously. For some reason his cock gave another heavy throb at being denied. He had never considered Laios being this hot when he was being responsible, of all things. Then he deflated with a huff that made Laios stammer again.
"I-I'm sorry! But I ... need you to tell me about this because you want to ... not because you can't think anymore."
Even though one part of Chilchuck still wanted to climb the man, now even more so than before, another, stronger part of him could admit that Laios was on to something. If they really wanted to try anything like this they needed to discuss it at least somewhat level-headed. As hard as pulling back now was.
But they were still pressed closely together and Chilchuck was happy to wrap his arms around Laios' neck and slip even closer. At least this had to still be allowed.
"You're right", he admitted as Laios arms found their way around him, one circling his waist, the other hand cupping his ass to tip him forward. "Gods, you are distracting sometimes..."
"Sorry", the word was warm against his lips and tasted of mint when they kissed, slow and deep and hot. The feverish heat crawling across Chilchuck's skin cooled down to a gentle simmer, the air between them still buzzing but with less urgency. After they parted from their indulgent kiss Chilchuck had made his peace with holding back. For now.
"Alright", he hummed, tilting back just enough so he could look at Laios. The slow, even grind of his hips did not stop. "What else do you want to know?"
"Anything you want to tell me. Like ... where would you want it to happen? Right here? On this bed?"
The images were immediate and vivid, Laios pushing his face down into these very sheets Chilchuck had fisted helplessly last night, pushing into him without care or mercy. But something about the fantasy was off.
"No...", he mumbled, still trying to find his reasoning. Then it occurred to him. "Too many people. I want to be loud. I want to scream..."
"Oh, yes..." The sigh was dreamy, Laios' gaze softening as he looked at Chilchuck, as if he were already imagining his helpless struggle. His shouts and screams and whimpers. "Somewhere secluded, then. Somewhere nobody can come and help you..."
"Right. I mean ... wait a minute! I don't want you to do anything, alright? It was just a stupid thing I said and it doesn't matter. We can just keep on doing what we've been doing."
"Ah", Laios hummed and shifted underneath him, Chilchuck's bare legs rubbing against the rough fabric of his breeches. "But you got so tight Chil ... if there's anything making you that excited ... I'd love to give it to you."
Something flipped in Chilchuck's stomach. It was not a bad feeling.
"And there's nothing to be embarrassed about! We'd just ... play pretend, yes? Just like Falin and I did when we were kids ... I didn't actually want to shoot and kill her when we played guards and bandits."
"Laios, stop talking about your sister right now."
Before him Laios straightened just slightly, eyes widening as if snapping to attention. It was ... cute. In a way that made Chilchuck soften more than was probably wise right now.
"Yes, of course, sorry!", he stammered, then let out a quick breath before continuing. "What I mean is ... if there's something you want, this or ... or anything else, really, we can always just try. I like making you feel good, Chil ... and I'd love to make you feel good in all the ways you want."
Laios' voice dipped at the end, sweet devotion in his words and longing in his eyes. Though there was something else as well, something hot and wanting. Chilchuck swallowed. So much gentle honesty was almost contagious. He let the words sit for a moment, contemplating the pleasantly relaxed offer. If Laios was so nonchalant about all this, if he really wanted to give Chilchuck everything, even this ... then maybe at least contemplating it further would not hurt.
"I don't even know why I like the idea so much...", he admitted after a long stretch of silence, carefully wading into these unfamiliar waters with Laios' warm hands heavy on his hips. Laios shrugged.
"Does it matter?"
"I..." Chilchuck frowned. He had always assumed there must be a reason for those quiet, secret thoughts he only allowed himself to indulge in every so often. But with Laios so uninterested in any possible explanation for his fucked up fantasies...
"I only care that you like it, not why. And ... I would also care about what you'd want to happen. If we ever tried it?" It was a careful suggestion, leaving Chilchuck enough room to back out if he needed to. But it was also direct enough to immediately summon a number of interesting images that made heat flood back into Chilchuck's cheeks.
Laios tearing his clothes off and pushing him down, fingering him rough and quick before slapping his ass and sinking inside, too fast, too soon. Laios cooing about Chilchuck's cries and whimpers but ignoring them otherwise. Laios using his body without much regard for his enjoyment or even comfort, pushing and pulling him into all kinds of positions, fucking into him for hours, leaving him marked up and bruised...
Chilchuck swallowed again and shifted in Laios' lap. His cock was already stirring inside the smallclothes he wore during the night. Laios' eyes followed his movements, subtle as they were, watching the bob of his throat, the slow roll and shift of his hips.
"Do you want to tell me?" Barely more than a whisper, no more pressing than the previous question. "Tell me what you want me to do to you...?" Chilchuck felt the breath catch in his throat at the sensual tone. Anything, he almost said, everything. Thankfully he was not that far gone. But with Laios eyes and hands on him ... Chilchuck did want to answer.
His lips were sticking together as he parted them, absent-minded tongue flicking out to wet them.
"I want...", he began but soon did not know how to continue. It was not like he had one nice, coherent fantasy he could simply tell Laios about. Those ideas were scattered, needy things he only ever allowed himself to indulge in alone and never for long. "I..."
"Come on", Laios encouraged, sweet without pushing too much. "I want to give you everything you want ... you just have to tell me." He pulled Chilchuck closer, slanting their hips together until the press of his half hard cock became very much apparent.
Laios was not just entertaining Chilchuck. He truly liked where this was going.
Chilchuck let out a heated breath and tried again.
"Sometimes I ... I think about you overpowering me. Holding me down and making me take it." His face was flushed hot by the time he had gotten the words out but the look in Laios eyes was worth every thudding heartbeat. There was a glimmer to them, one they sometimes held when they had been going for a while. As if nothing else mattered to him but wringing as much pleasure as possible out of Chilchuck's body. Intense and sparking.
"You like when I do that? When I use my strength on you and you can just let go? Ah, you're so beautiful when you let go, Chil..."
"Yes. Yes, but ... this time ... I'm asking you to stop or ... or to slow down." Chilchuck's gaze drifted lower at that, away from Laios' intense eyes and down to his chest. He reached up to splay the fingers of one hand against a bare collarbone, feeling the rhythmic thumping of a curious heartbeat. "But you don't. You just tell me I'll have to bear it for you ... 'cause you're not finished..."
Chilchuck's hips twitched at his own words, at the image he painted for both own them. Laios encouraged the movement, helping his hips rock forward and down, guiding them with his hands and pushing his own upward into the friction between them. Chilchuck shuddered as he felt the heat of Laios' growing erection even through the fabric of breeches and smallclothes.
"Mh, you like that thought? Me using you until I'm satisfied? Even if you're begging me to stop?"
"Fuck, Laios", Chilchuck bit out, his cock giving a heavy throb in his smallclothes. He had not expected his lover to be this on board with his dark little fantasies. It left him hopelessly enamoured and helplessly aroused.
Not sure if you like a lot of questions on here but have you finished dunmeshi yet? what made you gravitate to chilaios? you been providing some delicious food so I wonder if they happen to be your favorites too.
Oh don't worry anon, I love getting asks and questions here! Especially when they're this sweet and thoughtful!
I'm currently reading the manga but I haven't even caught up with the anime yet so for the moment I'm still blissfully ignorant of what is yet to come ... which is why my fics have been set at unspecified points in time until now, don't think too much into it lol
As for what got me into Chilaios, well you can thank curiumKingyo's fic Ripe Fruit to be honest ... I hadn't considered them before but kingyo truly opened my eyes and I've been unable to close them since then, now Chilaios are absolutely my favourites for various reasons ... I know there's still loads of amazing chilaios content out there but I'm trying to be good and finish the manga first ... though sometimes I just can't resist but take a peek at what everyone's been cooking ... and of course offer my own dishes for the buffet
For a moment Chilchuck was dumbfounded by the question. Last night had been incredible, Laios had spoiled him thoroughly for hours on end. He could not imagine where the tallman had gotten the idea there had been anything wrong about that ... until his waking mind remembered.
From one moment to the next the scent of cinnamon and vanilla left Chilchuck gagging.
"I didn't mean to and I'm sorry! I just ... I wanted to make you happy. But I didn't. Can you ... please explain what went wrong? So I can do better?"
Oh no. This was spiralling out of control. Chilchuck was the one who had lost his grip on his urges and ran his mouth without thinking but somehow Laios ended up blaming himself for it? And he was being so good about it, too. Getting him breakfast and apologizing and wanting to understand ... Chilchuck had to put a stop to this immediately.
"Hold on, hold on, no!", he blurted out and finally golden eyes snapped up to met his own. Alert and confused. "You have nothing to apologize for, alright? Everything's fine."
Blond eyebrows knitted together as Laios' tilted his head to the side. He was still sitting on his chair like a scolded schoolboy and the sight made Chilchuck want to scream.
"But ... the thing I asked about ... you didn't like it."
"That had nothing to do with you, I promise. You have done nothing wrong, Laios."
Laios' shoulders, so tight before, slumped at those words, tension bleeding out of his body and leaving him looking defeated.
"Then I don't get what's happening ... I was so sure you liked that thing when you said it. You got so tight, Chil." There was something soft to Laios' voice, something dreamy and longing, before it tipped back into lost confusion. "And so I thought that must be something you like, something I can give you. But when I asked about it I was so sure you got upset..."
Rumbling a noise of frustration Chilchuck dragged a hand down his face. Why, just why, could he not have kept his mouth shut and his depraved ideas to himself? As much as he had hoped to just brush this off and pretend it never happened ... that was not an option if it left Laios blaming himself for something he had not done.
"No, you're right. You're absolutely right. I did like it, when I said it ... and later I did get ... upset." The word did not sit right in his mouth but he might as well admit it if Laios had already picked up on it. "But that had nothing to do with you. I'll explain, alright? Just..."
He sighed again, wishing for a stiff drink despite the early hour. This conversation would be so much easier with alcohol. As it were he opted for the next best option.
"Just ... let me eat first? Oh, and uh ... thank you. For breakfast..."
Laios gave a wide eyed nod, then continued to sit there and watch as Chilchuck reached for the spoon and began eating. The porridge was fine, even though Chilchuck felt like something was missing. Maybe he had spent too much time in the dungeon around Senshi's cooking.
By the time he had stuffed a few spoonfuls into his mouth the nausea had ebbed away and Laios was still watching him. Waiting patiently for Chilchuck to explain. He looked much less tense and more curious now, eager to understand. Chilchuck sighed and waved at the idiot to join him.
"Come here already, I know you want to."
Before he had even finished the sentence Laios was halfway across the room and soon joined him on the bed, scooting close. It took some shifting but they found a comfortable position, Laios leaning back against the headboard with Chilchuck tucked against his side so he could continue eating.
"I really thought you were angry with me", Laios breathed, burying his face in Chilchuck's hair and pulling him close.
"I'm not. I was..." Chilchuck took a deep breath, letting the bowl sink into his lap. That was the thing about Laios. He needed honesty. Usually it was not this challenging to give it to him. "I was embarrassed. That's why I didn't want to talk about it."
"Oh ... why?"
Chilchuck had known this question would be coming. He stuffed another spoonful of porridge into his mouth so he did not have to answer right away. Of course Laios would be confused about this. He was obviously not in the habit of feeling ashamed about the things he enjoyed.
All the more reason to explain this as plainly as possible, even though it might not be pleasant.
"All my life I have been ... ignored, talked down to, exploited and abused. I have fought long and hard to not have that happen to me again. So I think I'm allowed to feel a bit conflicted about ... asking you to do the same thing to me in bed. Especially since I didn't mean to and it just ... slipped out."
Laios said nothing for a long moment and Chilchuck was quick to stuff his face again, tips of his ears burning. He had finished his bowl and placed it on the bedside table by the time Laios answered.
"Of course you're allowed. It wouldn't be, though. The same, I mean."
Turning back around Chilchuck frowned at Laios and a large hand found his to gently pull him closer again. He did not return to Laios' side, though. Instead those hands guided him to straddle Laios' thighs so they could look at each other. The position was intimate in a way that would have made Chilchuck's skin crawl just a few months ago. But he understood Laios wanted to see him for this, even if his face was flushed too dark a shade and he would much rather hide it.
"You don't actually want me to abuse you and do things you don't like, right?" Large hands settled on his hips, warm and grounding, a comforting weight. His face was relaxed, eyes awake as they watched Chilchuck settle into his lap.
Please note that this fic will heavily feature consensual non-consent. It will be negotiated and both Laios and Chilchuck will express enthusiastic consent about trying that kind of roleplay together. The first chapter will be entirely that with both of them enjoying their fantasy about it. The second chapter will feature the actual scene with all that entails. I will give another warning once we get there.
~~~
Chilchuck had no idea how much time had passed. He only knew that the night outside was dark, the air in the room hot and humid and his own skin slick with sweat where Laios' grabbed him to flip him over. One large, calloused hand supported his hip, pulling him up and back to where that cock sank into him again. Slick and deep. Chilchuck groaned, fisting the sheets between his fingers and biting into the fabric.
They must have been at it for hours. Chilchuck's entire body was aching, muscles straining, nearly unable to keep himself up anymore. Not that he had to. Somewhere along the way he had allowed Laios to take over, trusting his lover to handle him with the same care and efficiency he always used when they fucked. Pushing and pulling him into position as soon as Chilchuck's body gave out. Fucking into him over and over again until Chilchuck was floating.
He had always known tallmen had more stamina than half-foots. It was one of the things he had been excited about when this started between them, curious just for how long his younger lover could keep him entertained. Soon he had found out ... and not looked back since.
"You like that?", Laios panted above him, curling in on himself to bury his face in Chilchuck's sweaty hair. "Like when I push you down and take you, yeah? Like when I hold you still and fuck you good?"
Chilchuck whined, straining to push his hips up and back with all the strength still left in his body. Damp fabric slipped from between his teeth as he babbled out his mindless answer.
"Fuck Laios, yes ... yes, make me beg ... beg for mercy ... and don't show me any..."
Above him Laios faltered, the steady snap of his hips slowing for just a few seconds. Then he picked up his pace with renewed vigour, making Chilchuck's eyes cross and his mind sputter out for whatever came next.
~
"So...", Laios hummed as they laid there after, Chilchuck sprawled out half on top of him where he had collapsed after getting wiped down. For some reason Laios sounded brazenly lucid while Chilchuck was close to nodding off.
"Make you beg for mercy and not show you any ... is that something you're interested in?"
Within seconds Chilchuck was wide awake again, breath catching in his throat and heart skipping a beat. Or five.
Because that stirred a memory. A hazy memory from when he had been near mindless with pleasure. A memory of him running his stupid mouth saying stupid things he really should not have said.
"Uhm", he mumbled intelligently as he tried to scrape his scrambled brain together enough to answer. "It was just ... that was ... just dirty talk. Don't worry about it."
Laios shifted underneath him, arms pulling tighter where they wrapped around Chilchuck's back.
"Are you sure? Because if it's something you want..."
"I said don't worry about it. Go to sleep, Laios." He forced out the words so fast his tongue was stumbling over itself. Before Laios could react any further Chilchuck wiggled out of his grasp to reach down for the blanket and pull it up around his shoulders. Turning onto his side he felt Laios slowly settle down to curl around his back, a careful arm coming to circle his waist and pull him closer.
Chilchuck's heart was still beating a nervous rhythm against his ribs by the time Laios' breaths had grown deep and even.
~
Morning came slow.
They had booked the room for their few days of rest between expeditions into the dungeon so sleeping in was a luxury Chilchuck allowed himself when he got the chance. By the time he groaned and stretched and blinked his eyes open sunlight was already streaming through the window and the sounds of a busy street were drifting up to them from outside. Taking a few deep breaths Chilchuck watched specks of dust dance in the sunbeams as he slowly found his way to wakefulness.
He had been apprehensive about taking a room at the local inn, way too aware of how rumours tended to spread. In the end Laios had worn him down with puppy eyes and surprisingly sound arguments. The time the two of them could spend together was limited. Too limited to waste sneaking around or travelling to meet up at remote locations. They had done that for months but by now Chilchuck, too, would much rather spend their time like they had last night.
Rumours had already started to spread, of course, most of them outrageous. For some reason though Chilchuck found himself not caring too much about those when he woke up this relaxed after a night well spent.
He stretched again with a yawn, feeling something in his back pop as his sore muscles protested.
"Ugh, I'll be feeling that for days", he grumbled, voice annoyed but body wholly satisfied as he turned around. Then blinked in confusion.
The other side of the bed was empty. Laios never woke up before him.
Sitting upright with a low noise - and oh, his backside had definitely not recovered yet, either - he found the tallman seated at the desk, scribbling something into his notebook. He looked up as he noticed Chilchuck moving, a smile replacing the focused frown on his face.
"Ah, good morning! Hope I didn't wake you up?"
"No, I ... what are you doing?", Chilchuck asked, rubbing the last remnants of sleep from his eyes. Even if Laios occasionally woke up before him, he usually stayed in bed to get in as much skin on skin contact as possible. Now though he only shrugged, as if it were the most normal thing for him to be doing paperwork instead of clinging to Chilchuck under the covers.
"Just writing up a shopping list for our meet-up later. Oh, I also brought you some breakfast from downstairs!" He pointed at a wooden bowl and a spoon resting on the bedside table next to Chilchuck. "Mala made porridge and I snagged some extra berries for you."
So he had. When Chilchuck, unsure what to reply, reached for the bowl, he found the porridge still hot and steaming. A handful of blueberries and raspberries as well as some sunflower seeds were scattered across the top. It smelled of cinnamon and vanilla and other spices. But Chilchuck was not quite ready to dig in.
"Alright, what is going on?"
The smile on Laios' face faltered, he looked down, then at the bowl in Chilchuck's hands.
"Maybe you should eat first, the food's getting cold..."
"Laios, you're freaking me out."
The words were terse but not very loud or sharp and still Laios flinched in his chair, shoulders pulling up as he kneaded his hands. After a moment of tense contemplation he decided to turn around to fully face Chilchuck.
A quick, shallow breath.
"I did something wrong, didn't I?", he asked, eyes still focused on the wooden bowl in Chilchuck's hands. "Last night. I upset you."
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Without thinking about it Chilchuck reached out to cup a pale cheek with his hand, feeling the rough scratch of stubble against his palm and fingertips. Laios leaned into the touch as if he were starving, lashes fluttering as his eyes slipped closed. Despite his wide shoulders and impressive build he looked fragile. A frail, breakable, helpless little thing in Chilchuck's hands.
"Alright, we will do this once, stick to the plan, and then never speak of it again. Do you understand?"
Chilchuck felt his stomach turn, a sour taste on his tongue.
Laios would have agreed to anything at that moment and Chilchuck had been happy to accept his blind agreement. After all he thought it the quickest way to get rid of these distracting thoughts and scratch an annoying itch. As for Laios, well ... he had a little crush. It was innocent, fleeting. Puppy love. Nothing to write home about. Nothing that would stay.
Except that it was and it did. It would.
The proof had been in every second they spent together tonight. In the way Laios had looked at him, touched him, held him, kissed him. It was in the way he knelt for him and curled into him right now, savouring every little touch he could get. Knowing this was almost over and he had to take in what he could.
Chilchuck had never wanted to but there was no denying he held Laios' beating heart between his palms.
And even though the thought terrified him to no end and left him sick to his stomach ... there was no part of him that did not want to treat that heart gently. Even if it would leave him shaking every step of the way.
"Hey there", he mumbled, voice thick as he reached out with the other hand to cradle Laios' other cheek, pulling him just a bit closer as golden eyes fluttered open. "Don't look like that, stranger. This was ... fun. I wouldn't mind doing it again."
A flurry of emotions danced across Laios' features. Confusion, disbelief, hope, longing, doubt...
"But ... but you said..."
"I know what I said. But I think ... I changed my mind."
Even more emotions, more confusion, more disbelief, more giddy excitement.
Chilchuck's stomach was twisting but he owed Laios gentle hands and honesty. Also bluntness.
"I can't promise you anything", he said firmly, freezing Laios' expression in careful attentiveness. "But maybe we can start by ... forgetting about the whole never speak of it again thing?"
"Yes", Laios agreed immediately, eyes wide as he nodded. "Yes I ... I would love to speak of it again! I would, uh ... love doing it again! I ... I really like..."
"I know", Chilchuck interrupted him quickly. He could not hear it yet. Knowing was already enough to almost make him throw up. "I know and that's ... alright. I just need time, yes? We have to take it slow."
Considering his words Laios gave a slow, thoughtful nod.
"Yes, of course." Then an almost imperceptible smile snuck onto his lips, a glint in his eye. Sly and mischievous. "Half-foot steps."
"Do you want to die?", Chilchuck roared but his brief puff of anger disappeared with the first sounds of Laios' laughter ringing clear and carefree between them, cheeks scrunching up below his palms.
"Sorry, sorry", Laios said, raising his hands to cup Chilchuck's much smaller ones. "Slow sounds good. Anything you need."
"We need to figure out how to navigate this. Especially when it comes to the party. I won't let this impact our work."
A hum, a nod of agreement.
"You will figure something out", Laios said, complete trust in his words. "We do whatever you need us to do. But..."
"But?" The question was somewhat distracted as Chilchuck's brain began ticking away, already trying to wrap around this strange, new situation and how to best work with it.
"But can that be a question for tomorrow? I want ... I don't know. Can we just be ... close? For a bit longer?"
Watching Laios fumble through his needs was way too endearing. Chilchuck could not help but open his arms for the bumbling idiot.
"Come here."
As Laios shot up to wrap strong arms around him and bury a gleeful grin against his neck the only feeling left in Chilchuck's stomach was warm, bubbling contentment.
Laios did but not before slowly, gently, easing Chilchuck off his lap and throwing one last, wistful look down at his dripping hole. Then he headed over to a corner of the room where Chilchuck had prepared a few soft pieces of cloth as well as a bowl of water, grabbing both before coming back over towards the bed.
He hovered near the edge for a moment, gaze wandering between Chilchuck, still sprawled out boneless across the sheets, and the fabric and bowl in his hands. Then he hummed to himself, curious, as he dipped a piece of cloth into the water.
"Can I?"
It was a bold assumption Chilchuck would even consider allowing his help with this. A sharp, cynical part of Chilchuck wanted to snort and grab the items, clean himself quickly before he soaked the sheets even further. But something in the way Laios looked at him gave that part pause. There was a softness, an eagerness and devotion in the request that felt utterly disarming and that struck a chord within Chilchuck he usually kept well guarded. Of course Laios would be the one able to lay it bare and aim for it with gentle precision without even meaning to or noticing. This was exactly what Chilchuck had been worried about from the start and yet...
The cynical part hissed in defiance. Then fell quiet.
With his heart thumping in his chest and all the way up in his throat Chilchuck considered the request. Truly considered it without jumping to rash, defensive answers.
Laios seemed eager enough to help him, surely an extension of wanting to take care of Chilchuck as long as he was allowed. Yet something about the thought of simply lying back and letting Laios clean him made his skin prickle with heat. The notion alone felt even more intimate than literally allowing the tallman inside him and yet ... Chilchuck did not recoil from it. Not with that cynical part quiet and his body still loose and comfortable. Yes, there was something akin to fear stirring in his chest, in his abdomen, but the twisting coil of it was fluttery and curious.
All the while as Chilchuck considered, Laios stood there, waiting patiently, barely squirming in place. It was easy to tell just how much he wanted to do this for him. It was apparent in the way he held himself, shoulders tight as he clutched the items in his hands. As if he was only waiting for permission to jump back onto the bed and get to work. Yearning to please but not without permission. Never without permission.
It was that trust he had in the tallman that made Chilchuck nod in the end.
"You can." Barely more than a whisper, his own heartbeat choking the words on their way out.
Chilchuck would have expected all hells to break loose as soon as he agreed. Had expected Laios to jump into action, maybe spill most of the water in his excitement to get to work. Instead the tallman fell very, very still. For an endless moment neither of them moved, not a tremble shaking sticky fingers, not even a breath sucked into aching lungs.
Finally Laios moved. But not in the way Chilchuck had expected him to. Instead of climbing back onto the bed the tallman sank to his knees where he was standing. His movements were thoughtful and controlled as he set down both the bowl and the towels beside himself, then reached out with careful hands.
It was only when Chilchuck did not protest that those large hands wrapped around his bruised hips once more and pulled him towards the edge of the bed.
"Don't worry", Laios said, quiet and serious in a way that made Chilchuck swallow. "I won't do anything weird. It just ... feels right. This way."
"O-oh ... alright...", Chilchuck mumbled as he pushed himself up onto his elbows to watch.
What else was he even supposed to say to that? Especially when Laios stared at him with an intensity that made him feel less like he was about to be devoured and more like Laios was about to pledge his life, his undying loyalty and many more, unspeakable things to him.
There were no words left for Chilchuck to utter, no will to protest, when Laios moved to arrange his body as he pleased, using the same calm, controlled movements as before. He braced one of Chilchuck's feet against his shoulder, then pushed the other leg up and back to open him up. Surely giving him an obscene view of Chilchuck's still dripping, loosened hole.
He kept to his word, though, and did not do anything weird. Instead he reached down to pick up the damp cloth and run it between Chilchuck's cheeks. The first touch was surprisingly cold and uncomfortable and he hummed a low, soothing noise as Chilchuck jumped. Then pressed a gentle kiss against his bent knee before continuing.
"There's so much", he breathed, devotion and fascination and adoration so heavy in his tone that Chilchuck felt his skin prickle and run hot again. His entire body humming with Laios' rapt attention. "Can't believe you took it all. You're incredible, Chil ... just look at you."
Chilchuck still did not know what to reply so he kept quiet. Willing his thighs to stop trembling as Laios set out to clean him with quiet focus. He worked with diligence and persistence, rinsing the cloth several times between careful, slow swipes of his hand. Then replaced it with a clean, dry one to finish his work off.
He was still quiet when he set everything aside and lowered Chilchuck's leg, allowing it to hang freely off the edge of the bed. Lowering the one that had been braced against his shoulder right after.
He just knelt there afterwards, still and silent, radiating a deep, honest satisfaction. As well as something else. Something darker. Heavier.
Chilchuck swallowed, pushed himself upright. He was looking down at Laios like this, with the tallman sitting back on his haunches, and the way golden eyes blinked up at him tugged on something in his chest. Those eyes were still soft, were still loyal. But they were also hurting.
