J, 28 y/o autistic transfem lesbian, full intro in pinned. List your age clearly on your blog before following or interacting. Asks and inbox are always open (though being autistic I am kinda shit at conversation)!
OK, new pinned post because this blog is more varied than when I first made it.
My name here is J (if you'd like something more distinctly name-shaped Jay is good too); I am nonbinary transfem, I accept any pronouns but do not default primarily to masc; I am 28 years old, I live in London
I am a lesbian, single and a sub-leaning switch top-leaning verse
Asks & DMs are open, sexually and otherwise, though if we've not talked before and you wanna flirt/sext you could at least say hi first (unless you're a hot transfem and I'm in a mood) (also I am autistic so be aware my conversational skills may seem sub-par)
Have your age visible before interacting, this is an adult space and you must be 18+ to be here. Additionally, flirting with me is for over-21s and under-40s.
No bootlickers. I am a Communist; if you support or excuse the evils of capitalism and its structural expressions such as imperialism and the existence of police or military forces, or if you harbour any form of prejudice (which I would like to explicitly state includes dismissal or downplaying of transmisogyny), you are not welcome here.
Relatedly, if you define your kink limits as "anything illegal", interrogate that conception and shift your framework of acceptable behaviour away from how governments define it. It's illegal for me to have sex at all in my country unless I fully explain my gender beforehand - is that really the kind of system you want to define your limits?
If there's anything you're unsure of or want to know after reading this, feel free to ask!
My main is @/li*******a***l, in case any mutuals from one or the other see me show up and wonder (and if we've talked you can ask for it!)
Emoji sign-offs currently used by anons (not a requirement for sending, but welcome if you want to use one!): 💜, 🍋, 🗝 , 🖌,🪻
Gonna put further details, such as my tags & things I like, under a cut:
Things I like/may post about (non-exhaustive):
Tickling, the kink I initially started this blog for
General submissiveness
Bondage
Light impact/pain play (spanking, biting, scratching etc.)
A varyingly limited level of CNC
A degree of embarrassment
Mild somno
Vampires
Robots
Things I dislike/will not be posting about (non-exhaustive):
Bodily fluid play, including spit and sweat
Defined power dynamics & titles, including petplay & familial titles (including fauxcest)
Gags
Extreme CNC
Degradation
Severe sadism/masochism
Hypnosis
Preferred terms when referring to me/my body:
Girl is the standard term especially if you want to praise me, slut if you want to tease me, prettyboy is also fun (transfems only on that one though)
Chest or breast(s) for the obviously implied region
Transphobia is about to be signed into law in the UK. We can fight this.
I am begging the UK trans community and its allies to attend the Mass Lobby at Parliament on June 25th, 11am-4pm, organised by Trans Solidarity Alliance.
Last year we broke the record for an LGBT+ mass lobby of Parliament. Will you help us break it again? Join us on 25th June 2026 to demand be
The new EHRC Code of Practice pushes trans people out of toilets, hospital wards, and community spaces. It normalises gender policing based on appearance and stereotypes. It becomes statutory guidance in the UK by the end of June.
Trans people are now legally their assigned gender at birth and must join gendered spaces accordingly, but if they are perceived as their lived gender, they can also be ejected from those spaces. The guidance says: either break the law, or don’t pass too well.
A mass lobby is where you invite your MP to discuss your concerns with you in-person. Ask your MP to:
Demand full parliamentary scrutiny, debate, and use their free vote on the EHRC Code of Practice.
Support any motions rejecting the EHRC guidance. As of June 4th, Labour MP Nadia Whittome has submitted a prayer motion - Early Day Motion 240.
Write to Bridget Phillipson, the Minister for Women and Equalities about our concerns
Your MP does not have to be an ally, they do not have to respond to your email for you to show up and greencard them (details below the cut.) What matters is that as many people as possible show up.
I cannot stress this enough: Showing up in person matters. It is much more effective than petitions, emails, and letters.
It is a horrible, stressful time, and I am so sorry if you're trans and live in the UK. But I was at last year's mass lobby and the line for greencarding alone stretched around the back gates. It was a record breaking mass lobby and made us impossible to ignore. Let's do even better this time. Details under the cut:
Worried about what to say?
Bring your personal worries about transphobia being signed into law, and trans friends being excluded from public spaces. You are a living person who deserves dignity. Remind your MP of that. You will also get guidance and brochures from Trans Solidarity Alliance that outlines our demands. This is mine from last year.
Money issues?
Trans Solidarity Alliance provides a travel bursary that you can sign up for via the link.
Got a refusal or no response from your MP?
Come anyway! You can request a same-day appointment with your MP through a process called greencarding. They will come and see you if they’re already in Parliament. Even if they don’t, they’re made acutely aware of your cause because you showed up in person. This is my greencard from last year.
Here is the EHRC Code of Practice in full. It's a tough read, but some highlights are:
Organisations can’t provide trans-inclusive, single-sex services, or they risk being sued for discrimination.
e.g. domestic violence support for women including trans women, men’s rugby group including trans men (12.68).
Trans people will have nowhere safe to pee.
If you’re a trans man, businesses can't allow you to pee in the men's, and you can also be ejected from women’s bathrooms if you’re perceived as a man. Vice versa for trans women. EHRC suggests a ‘third space’ bathroom, which is discriminatory and unworkable for most businesses. (13.130-133)
Sports organisations must exclude trans people from single-sex competitions (13.73).
A women’s only sports competition must exclude trans women because of their biological advantage or face potential lawsuits (13.74), but a trans man who has undergone testosterone treatment can also be excluded based on fairness rules (13.81).
Trans women are stripped of the legal definition of ‘lesbian’, and therefore no longer have legal protections if they’re discriminated against on the basis of sexual orientation. (2.50, 2.92).
Here is the Good Law Project's better explanation of the EHRC Code.
I have also made a PDF printout of QR codes for the government petition, email your MP tool, and mass lobby link to pass around your communities. DM me and I'll send it to you.
How beautiful that modern technology has let me not only encounter my crush in the first place but impress her with my guitar-playing like I'm some sleazy indie dude or 70s rockstar despite being 5000 miles away (she had a watch party for mutuals and I worked out the show's main theme by ear in the 60 seconds or so it was playing, put the root notes in the chat and she was like "fhdgshsf if I could directly react to messages here it would just be :O")
Anyway time to jerk off (unrelated) fast and intense enough to hopefully knock me out to get like four and a half hours' sleep before five hours of hard dual-weapon martial arts (yes I stayed up to virtually hang out with her despite knowing full well how fucked I'll be in the morning because of course I did)
Once again worrying with not that much material basis that I said something too gushingly affectionate and made my crush uncomfortable
I pre-emptively apologised in the same message 'cause I was concerned it might come out that way but y'know that still doesn't make it any easier (especially for her anxious conflict-avoidant self) to actually say "yeah you're right it was excessive, cool it" if I'm right
OK well her reply ignored that aspect of the message entirely so like maybe I was right which I know is still speculative but like not even a little "thanks sweetie <3" which is fairly normal for us does I think lend a little credence to the speculation
Ugghhhh did you know it fucking sucks being socially inept and insecure while hopelessly in love with your friend you don't have any material chance with
Once again worrying with not that much material basis that I said something too gushingly affectionate and made my crush uncomfortable
I pre-emptively apologised in the same message 'cause I was concerned it might come out that way but y'know that still doesn't make it any easier (especially for her anxious conflict-avoidant self) to actually say "yeah you're right it was excessive, cool it" if I'm right
Crush made a sad post about being single for Pride month again and aaah girl you know there is someone painfully far away who desperately wants to be with you!!!! If the world were just a little bit kinder you wouldn't have to feel this way!!!!!
Once again I actually kinda want to jerk off tonight but I am not going to because my alarm goes off in five hours, a rare sensible decision from me
I don't fucking want to get up in five hours, I wish I could never go to the fucking job centre again and they'd just leave me the fuck alone forever, but alas
Six days later and I never did, only briefly saw the enthusiasm return in short periods, granted the week being uncomfortably warm didn't help but still
Maybe that would actually help me sleep, should probably try, though yeah I am once again lacking in enthusiasm
Yet another disinterested 8AM wank in which I can barely even keep myself fully hard because I just don't really want to be doing it that much 👍 I'm such a functional human being
Once again I actually kinda want to jerk off tonight but I am not going to because my alarm goes off in five hours, a rare sensible decision from me
I don't fucking want to get up in five hours, I wish I could never go to the fucking job centre again and they'd just leave me the fuck alone forever, but alas
Six days later and I never did, only briefly saw the enthusiasm return in short periods, granted the week being uncomfortably warm didn't help but still
Maybe that would actually help me sleep, should probably try, though yeah I am once again lacking in enthusiasm
Crush made a post asking if she should try and start dating again and like sweetie of course I want you to find love and happiness and fulfilment and an end to this terrible loneliness and I will be nothing but supportive and happy for you but also y'know it would kind of kill me and tear me apart because I want that more than anything in the world and I know that's not possible so you finding someone else is the only feasible avenue of such happiness but that does not make the prospect hurt any less
