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Today was one of the craziest days of my life. One of those days that marks a new chapter. You know those days that stand out? The ones you remember forever? Haha, welp… Today was one of those days.

I started off the morning waking up from a nightmare. I decided today would be a good day. I got...

bushybrowboy-deactivated2015041

My goal is to be that rich single aunt that flies everywhere and wears designer clothing and brings expensive gifts to her less successful family members

ulibeanzz

ya hes cute…….but is he conscientious of the social inequalities and corruption in hierarchies of power that plague this world

betterthankanyebitch

She sounds just like Bey…lmao

If u want to follow my new, positive, slightly fitness related but not entirely/fashion and other things I like- blog…message me!💜

Life is grand p>

This is the only photo I took of this night. I wanted to capture how I felt at the gym in that moment.

A diary entry to myself, Sally.

Today was one of the craziest days of my life. One of those days that marks a new chapter. You know those days that stand out? The ones you remember forever? Haha, welp… Today was one of those days.

I started off the morning waking up from a nightmare. I decided today would be a good day. I got a hair cut that was shorter than I had expected but turns out is liberating and amazing. Go to work. Kill it. Make more tips than any one else who’s worked there thus far (we’ve only been open less than a week aha but hey! It counts for something) ended work on a great note at 11pm. Head to the gym. Quite a long drive but I enjoy it because it gives me time to listen to music. I keep noticing my hair. Haven’t had it like this since I was a kid. I am strong. I don’t need to hold on to my locks to be beautiful. It frames my face nicely. I like this. Smoke a bowl outside the gym. Head in. Start my workout immediately. Looking in the mirror telling myself don’t stop. Don’t ever stop. When you think you’re tired keep going. I don’t stop. I won’t stop. Are you gonna make this your life sal? I was born to make this my life. To make a career out of this because it is so damn good for me and without this, without this outlet I would be lost. This is you Sally this is you making yourself better, I tell myself. Don’t stop until you meet your goal and always go a few seconds or minutes or however fucking long you can overboard. Go until you can’t anymore. I stop for a sec because I found out something devastating. I let myself shed one tear about it. I got back up and trained harder. I made that the best damn work out of my life. I ran for the first time since my breast reduction surgery and I killed it. I just went in. Haven’t stepped foot on the treadmill in almost 2 months. And I just ran. I ran and I didn’t stop. Not for a second. And I was so stoned and the music in my head was playing to my muscles moving and to the beat of my heart so strongly, I became the music and I became the sound itself and i couldn’t stop. My heart would hurt and damn I was mad. More mad at myself than anything. But I realized that this is one of those things that shapes you and dammit this is great because the last time I went through this I became this amazing person. I grew from it. I changed a lot about myself after. And I just am actually so grateful this is happening now. It gives me more motivation because here’s the truth I realized about life. About my life. About what a life is; not making it happen, not making your life everything you want it to be…. Is not an option. It’s not ever something you can ponder in your mind. You have to just decide. We’ll is it gonna happen? Or not. It is up to you to make it happen.

I was in the gym for so long and you know what? Usually I wear spandex and a shirt but this time I wore zip up hoodie and Baggie shorts, with my short haircut….. And I never felt so beautiful. Really. I am making my life. I am becoming a person. And I will not settle for anything less than the person I want to become. And dammit I am mad. I spent a portion of my time there tonight punching the wall as hard as I could. This is making me strong. And failure is not an option. My steps for this life I choose is to work my ass off in school.

The drive home from the gym was beautiful. Put my music on full blast dance in the car scream laugh acknowledge the situation for what it is. And just fuckin go with it. Because that’s all you can do. And love it for what it is. And this is life. And I am a human experiencing life. It will be okay. And this is part of the journey.

Walk in the door. Strip. Shower. Wash my face. Tug at my hair. Shake it out. Brush my teeth. I feel like I’m going to throw up. I feel so much right now I think I may actually throw up. Dry heaving over the toilet naked. Throw up. I can’t believe it. Life is so intense right now I actually just threw up. And I laughed. I just fucking laughed. Because it’s okay Sally. Just keep going and make your life. Feel blessed for these days. Feel thankful because these are the days that matter. These are the days that will mold you into becoming the woman you are meant to be.