Something's Come to Mind

semi-dependant Loki/Aesir sideblog from Bayonetta 2.

[cyberneticlagomorph]

me: my bed is not big enough for all 20 something of you im sorry

my children: bibi is evil?? bibi is unyielding??? bibi hates us????

my eldest child: get a bigger bed dummy

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

with one of those fancy fans that keeps the sheets cool!

[duostrilonde]

@flyxngsquxrrelshadxws

we should match icons

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

we absolutely the fuck should. what'd you have in mind?

[cyberneticlagomorph]

Transistor took an eyes open nap and woke up covered in stickers and glitter

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

Dart and Ali were dared (double dog dared in fact) that they couldn't do it without using Witch Time/Light Speed and would get eaten.

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

looks like i'm taking the metal detector out for a walk

[cyberneticlagomorph]

My oldest kids were straight up grilling this morning, I'm talking at 6 am

When asked wtf they're doing, they replied "breakfast is a social construct” and handed me a cheeseburger

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

Duo woke me up like "you want a burger or a glizzy" and i said both before i even knew whether i existed.

[cyberneticlagomorph]

Idk what they put in that burger but I'm still thinking about it

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

i saw they had that picture of a cow with all the cuts of meat mapped out on their phone and spices i didn't recognize next to the big bowl of meat

i don't know if there is a god of the cookout but duo is definitely their messenger today.

[cyberneticlagomorph]

My oldest kids were straight up grilling this morning, I'm talking at 6 am

When asked wtf they're doing, they replied "breakfast is a social construct” and handed me a cheeseburger

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

Duo woke me up like "you want a burger or a glizzy" and i said both before i even knew whether i existed.

[cyberneticlagomorph]

yes im gonna spend my entire sick day ranting about a horror movie series my 4 year old loves because that ending was shit and she deserves better

"yeah they incinerated bunnicorn AND the grimoire at the same time and that ended the curse/experiment for good"

BROT HTEY DID THAT IN THE FIRST MOVIE AND WE STILL HAD 4 MORE MOVIES AFTER THAT IT DIDNT WORK THEN WHY WOULD IT WORK NOW

chewing holes in the upholstery

"um actually the scientists used a solar incinerator--"

im shaking you like a dog toy

just because they concentrated the power of the sun doesn't mean

actually imma go touch grass im getting too worked up

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

she does deserve better, though.

[cyberneticlagomorph]

"PLEASE I'LL SCYTHE *AND* BALE, I'LL HERD AND MILK THE SHEEP, I'LL MUCK THE PENS, I'LL SADDLE THE CHICKENS, DON'T MAKE ME GO--"

Sir (my 6 year old)... Sir are you ok? Do I need to make an Appearance??

Blink twice if you need help

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

do they need me to come play cool older brother

[cyberneticlagomorph]

I have no clue, but this is the 2nd time Dart has called me crying from school

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

i'll pick 'em up from school and have him point out who is bothering him.

a parent is one thing, that's an adult who has to abide by adult rules. once they see he has an older brother, that's a potential foot in the arse.

[cyberneticlagomorph]

Thank you

I mean it

I hope it's just jitters and not something serious

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

no worries, happy to help Bayonetta's kid anyway.

[cyberneticlagomorph]

"PLEASE I'LL SCYTHE *AND* BALE, I'LL HERD AND MILK THE SHEEP, I'LL MUCK THE PENS, I'LL SADDLE THE CHICKENS, DON'T MAKE ME GO--"

Sir (my 6 year old)... Sir are you ok? Do I need to make an Appearance??

Blink twice if you need help

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

do they need me to come play cool older brother

[cyberneticlagomorph]

I have no clue, but this is the 2nd time Dart has called me crying from school

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

i'll pick 'em up from school and have him point out who is bothering him.

a parent is one thing, that's an adult who has to abide by adult rules. once they see he has an older brother, that's a potential foot in the arse.

[cyberneticlagomorph]

"PLEASE I'LL SCYTHE *AND* BALE, I'LL HERD AND MILK THE SHEEP, I'LL MUCK THE PENS, I'LL SADDLE THE CHICKENS, DON'T MAKE ME GO--"

Sir (my 6 year old)... Sir are you ok? Do I need to make an Appearance??

Blink twice if you need help

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

do they need me to come play cool older brother

[cyberneticlagomorph]

my kids have started bringing home strays

i've had

AT LEAST

TWO fresh weirdos (that I know of) show up on my property this week, also found out that Hunbun and Lily's parents have been spreading rumors about some sort of 'child snatching monster' in the area

there's like

really shitty wanted posters of what i assume is supposed to be me nailed to every telephone pole and bulletin board in that neighborhood

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

yeah we were gonna go deface em

[cyberneticlagomorph]

It's snowing again

But in a normal direction this time

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

i'm building a fort.

[cyberneticlagomorph]

Sweater Beast brought her Brother Twin over today so I did the only logical thing and took them and the rest of my child horde to the local Fazbear’s for lunch

Watching Brother Twin go ape shit doing white girl dance music on the karaoke machine has healed something within me I think

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

man's got pipes

[cyberneticlagomorph]

I go to take my medically prescribed after breakfast nap only to hear a crash followed by screaming and nerf gun fire and realize the kids are playing blind man's bluff again

I can and will sleep through this

Mercy's phone number is on the fridge if anybody starts bleeding

Keep Benji out of my snack cabinets

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

got it boss

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

i'm really not bleeding. Dart saw red tinted boogers and started crying.

[cyberneticlagomorph]

heard a crash in the 3rd living room and someone screaming followed by more screaming and some crying so i guess the kids are playing blind man's bluff again

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

NO ONE'S BLEEDING I SWEAR

[cyberneticlagomorph]

what a suspicious ass thing to say

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

i was having dry nostrils before this and got the red tinted snot knocked out of me i am NOT bleeding.

[cyberneticlagomorph]

cool cool, first aid kit is in the cabinet next to the cigars we keep for company

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

i got tissues i'm good

[cyberneticlagomorph]

heard a crash in the 3rd living room and someone screaming followed by more screaming and some crying so i guess the kids are playing blind man's bluff again

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

NO ONE'S BLEEDING I SWEAR

[cyberneticlagomorph]

what a suspicious ass thing to say

[flyxngsquxrrelshadxws]

i was having dry nostrils before this and got the red tinted snot knocked out of me i am NOT bleeding.