i am victoria's secret

many have tried to kill me, but few have succeeded.

[fourlet]

what is a child but an undercooked man

[fourlet]

i walk into a graveyard at midnight on halloween wearing nothing but a see-through, fur-lined black robe and a necklace of men’s fingerbones. i “accidentally” drop my robe with a sexy flourish and try to cover my sexy body with my hands — sexily, of course.

“oh no!” i say, sexily. “i sure hope no sexy, sexy zombies rise from the dead and fall in love with me!”

an entire crowd of police officers taze me instantly and i convulse on the ground. there are no zombies. this isn’t halloween and i’m not in a graveyard.

[mitamajr]

Hey op, wtf?

[fourlet]

relatable content for the masses to reblog

[fourlet]

my love language is unrestrained screaming

[fourlet]

it is only a matter of time before i regain my strength and reabsorb god

[fourlet]

that trickster god you worship is nothing more than a foolish child. pay tribute to real gods for once in your miserable lives, you worms

[fourlet]

time? sexy. space? sexy. time-space continuum? pure human folly and our maker shall punish us for our sins

[fourlet]

you really think i would learn a forbidden language long thought destroyed by immortal monks and summon an ancient entity of chaos and entropy just for attention?

well, you're goddamn right

[fourlet]

op doesn't exist but go off i guess

[fourlet]

yes, hello, where might one find

the void

asking for a friend

[fourlet]

my preferred means of communication is the sound of footsteps behind you in an ancient wood when no one else is supposed to be around

[fourlet]

i walk into a graveyard at midnight on halloween wearing nothing but a see-through, fur-lined black robe and a necklace of men’s fingerbones. i “accidentally” drop my robe with a sexy flourish and try to cover my sexy body with my hands — sexily, of course.

“oh no!” i say, sexily. “i sure hope no sexy, sexy zombies rise from the dead and fall in love with me!”

an entire crowd of police officers taze me instantly and i convulse on the ground. there are no zombies. this isn't halloween and i'm not in a graveyard.

[fourlet]

there is no hope. only bones

[fourlet]

i'm haunted, but not by ghosts

[fourlet]

my ghost ghostwrites all my posts

[fourlet]

strangle me, father

[fourlet]

when the universe inevitably collapses in on itself, i will still be here. waiting. i don't know what for, but that's part of the fun

[fourlet]

i am the elder god your parents warned you about