Fragmented おと

SLIVERS OF PRE-APOCALYPTIC MUSINGS.

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if there was a plane that I could make out and have sex with, it'd definitely be the F14 Tomcat.

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unemployed. feeling the heat. but not today. today I'm feeling awesome.

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closure is a myth; coping is reality.

i still see her in people, i still find her face amongst faces.

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lunch epiphany

pain doesn't go away to be honest. all it does is get dissipated and shifted from one to another. that's about it, really.

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Job.

job hunting in the early hours of the day are probably the most productive.

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last one in the car. radio's off. windows down. clear mind, clear thoughts.

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"That's how depression hits. You wake up one morning afraid that you're going to live." - Prozac Nation

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it's good to be alone. no one can hurt you, and neither can you hurt anyone.

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there actually isn't any meaning to life. at all.

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4 pills.

4 pills last night were absolutely necessary, if only to enable sleep that gives you no recollection during the process. I call it Death Sleep. it's the closest thing to being nothing at all, for without our minds and consciousness, we are nothing.

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track for the night. easily one of my favourites from The Fauns.

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back to 'em pills tonight again. yep.

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hate my job. loathe myself.

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got the keys to my new apartment today, and this walkway is my favorite party: no more annoying instances of meeting a neighbor and having that awkward moment. definitely appealing to the anti-social side in me.

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weekends are meant to be spent at home alone and not be fucking disturbed by anyone. especially when a world conquest is going on.

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Friday. feeling good about today. feeling good in general. hopefully it's not just a fleeting moment.

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having a really nice taxi uncle just makes my day. doesn't intrude, understands your plight, "have a good rest, it's very late, you must be tired.". like a surrogate father for the moment. I mean, the only living creature who knows it is The Cat. sees the tired face, feels the lethargic care, yet still makes an effort to make a welcome home. will be devastated when she passes. cos I mean, where else is the warmth gonna come from in the house?