Gerard’s interview from this weeks issue of Kerrang! Continued from last weeks issue. As always, apologies for any typos or misspellings. I do this all by myself and I hope it’s at least readable enough for everyone. Here is a link to an easy to read google docs copy.
Kerrang! has had the lion’s share of Gerard Way’s 11-track debut solo album for a month now. It’s a total headfuck. First, there’s Bureau, it’s doomy stabs of organ recalling the minimalistic psychedelica of Spaceman 3 or even The Velvet Underground. Of course, Action Cat - Gerard’s brilliant lead-off debut single - you’ll have already heard, sounding like The Jesus And Mary Chain falling into something soft. Then there’s No Shows - a Pixies tune that’s much better than anything on the most recent Pixies album - and the excellent beat-pop of Millions, which has been doing the rounds as a bootleg ever since Gerard aired the tune at his appearance with comic book hero Grant Morrison last October. Next up, Zero Zero does wonderful things with backing vocals. yet perhaps best of all is Juaraz, which is the most deranged bit of rock’n’roll our man has ever put into the world. It’s a record blatantly not concerned with whether you like it or not, but, at the same time, a collection of songs desperate to be heard.
So, when did these new songs come about?
"They happened over the course of a long time," explains Gerard, sinking into the sofa in a plush side-room of London’s Soho Hotel. "I was depressed. I couldn’t get out of bed. I moved into a new house - a big house way out in Tarzana [in Los Angeles, California] because that was just what I thought I was supposed to be doing. Expanding. Like, ‘Alright! My Chemi are gonna do another album, you know. It’s a guaranteed X amount of dollars. It’s just for doing this, it doesn’t matter if it sells, it doesn’t matter if anybody likes it, it’ll just keep going…’ I got this big house. It was super-depressing and I wouldn’t get out of bed. Doug McKean, the producer of the new songs, who was gonna be the producer of the last My Chem record, too, would call me up and he’d say, ‘What are you doing?’ and I’d say, ‘Nothing.’ And he’d say, ‘Come to the studio, let’s just put something on tape.’ And this went on for some time…"
"And then I started to get really excited about this stuff, and then My Chem was breaking up, and the band broke up, and we looked back at what I had, and we were like, ‘Oh, we’ve got something here, this is an album,’ so we just kept going…"
You don’t think writing your own song exacerbated your decision to call time on My Chemical Romance?
"No," says Gerard, straight off the bat. "The two were so unrelated. There was definitely not a moment where I was like, ‘Oh my god, what I’m doing is so good, I have to break up the band.’ I think the breakup of the band was such a long time coming…"
It must have made you feel good though, if you were writing and recording things that you thought were cool - but, at the same time, you were unhappy…
"In a therapy way, it felt good. It felt good to actually be physically doing something; it gave me something potentially to look forward to. But then there was the time when I had to process the break-up. I had to actually do the break-up, so that took a lot of time away from actually making things…"
How long was it between ending My Chem and going back to the solo stuff?
"I think there was a bout a couple of months. They were just demos at that stage, though. It wasn’t until that summer that we went to Texas and did the principal tracking."
So, here’s a question - earlier (readers, you’ll have about this in part one of this interview last week], you said that Danger Days was essentially all about rebelling against the idea of the end of youth…
"It was like a pre-midlife midlife crisis…"
Yeah. But what’s weird though, is you’re not coming back with some gnarly acoustic record and saying, “I’m making music for adults now…” That’s the done thing.
You’re still like making comic books. You’re still making scuzzy rock that’ll upset people…
So, you’re still being the perennial teenager?
"Yeah, I am, and I guess the difference between me now and me then is I don’t have to prove it; I’m not trying to prove anything."
Gerard smiles. “I think the guy that made Danger Days was trying to prove something, was trying to make sure that people knew - but now I don’t care to prove it. I mean, to me, a lot of this record is about figuring out how I fit into the musical landscape. Not in an outsider way at all; I realized I don’t fit in, and that’s how I fit. S, by not fitting, I fit. That’s my place; my place is to be different. And my favourite musicians throughout the years were all the exact same way, like Iggy [Pop], or [David] Bowie, or Brian Eno, Nick Cave, Morrissey… They’re all in this area where they’re not contemporary, they’re not punk, they’re just them. But yeah, this is definitely a record of not trying to prove anything.”
I can’t imagine you ever growing a beard and making an alt.folk record, to be honest…
Gerard smiles. “No, I won’t. Well, I can’t say for definite that I won’t, but writing that sort of record isn’t me. I’m not going to make my grown-up record - even when I am grown up, it won’t be a grown-up record. I don’t think Brian Eno has ever made a grown-up record, I don’t think David Bowie has ever made a grown-up record. He was doing fucking [1997 album] Earthling when he was, what, 45 or something? Breakbeats and hanging out with Nine Inch Nails! So yeah, I don’t think I’ll ever do that. I avoided it in My Chem, and we did a pretty good job of it, too, because there definitely was that period where it was like, ‘Let’s all grow beards and wear flannel now.’ I don’t know. I guess it’s because I’m not a fan of that kind of stuff. I don’t listen to it, I didn’t like the resurgence of it, I didn’t like the old version of it. Like, give me Bob Dylan any day of the week, but I don’t need carbon copies of him…”
So, you can make a promise to those people who miss MCR that you’ll never be boring?
"I’ll never be boring, I don’t think. I can’t promise you won’t’ get bored of my shit. But I’ll never stay the same for long enough for you to get bored of it. I’ll just keep moving."
What’s interesting today, as Gerard sprawls on the sofa, clad in green parka, a faded old Smiths t-shirt, his hair a mustardly yellow, is this is perhaps the first time Gerard Way - that’s not the pale-faced goth schoolboy, the grey-haired Patient, the flame-headed Killjoy - has sat down for an interview with Kerrang! wearing, and indeed comfortable in, his own skin. It’s a look that reflects the new music; no arch concept, no overarching theme, just what it is. He has, literally, to paraphrase that other confused counterculture hero, come as he is.
"Which is really new for me," nods Gerard. "There’s some element of costume - maybe this is just my new costume, to not have one? but you’re right. I know what you mean by that. I’m an artist now, and this is what I look like today. Next week I’ll look like something different, maybe…"
One of the things I loved about My Chemical Romance was the sheer scope, the ambition of it. I can’t work out where that ambition is now…
"Yeah, I can see that…" says Gerard.
Like, you obviously seem very happy and have a beautiful family. You don’t have to beg people for money because you’ve got a big house and stuff, and your legacy is preserved because My Chem were so important. What is it you need by doing this?
Gerard shuffles in his seat. “What do I need? Part of the point is that I don’t need anything. I need to make art. I don’t need fame, I don’t need any of that stuff. I need to exist. I need to be giving, I need to be sharing. It’s my job to share and give. I need to share my art - that’s all I need. I don’t need anything else. People allow me to do that, and I’m really grateful for that; they allow me to share. I think they always will, so there’s no ceiling on it - but my ambition isn’t to galvanise a youth culture.”
I think that’s what I’m getting at. As a fan of My Chemical Romance, that makes me sad…
"Yeah, I get it," says Gerard. "But my goal was never that, in a weird way. I was never trying to get them to fight the government! I was just trying to get them to be good to each other. I definitely just feel like they don’t need direction from me. I’m not trying to give them a direction."
You talked a bit about the responsibility thrust upon you to ‘look after’ My Chemical Romance frans [readers, see last week’s issue…] and how you didn’t always feel qualified to help…
Gerard hangs his head. “All that stuff, dude… it has an effect on you over a long period of time; it wear you down a bit. It’s not me running from that responsibility is it? It’s my responsibility to be a good person and that’s it, really. Again, I’m not trying to prove anything. I’m trying to change some stuff - I’m trying to get fuzz pedals on the radio. I’m trying to do a lot of stuff - but what I’m not trying to do is force it. I’m trying to do my thing and, if people dig it, that’s cool. If they don’t, that’s also cool, but I’m going to keep doing it. I think all my favourite artists are the same. Like, ‘This is what I do - dig it or fuck off.’”
I never saw that as your mind-set in My Chemical Romance.
"I think it was, I think it absolutely was. I think we were like, ‘get in line or kiss my ass.’ So maybe it was a harsher version of what I was explaining now. I definitely am not saying kiss my ass."
Okay, help me understand the DNA of these songs - What music inspired them?
Gerard looks flushed with excitement. “okay, so what I did was tap deep into the state of what was having the most profound effect on me when I was going to art school as a teenager. that was My Bloody Valentine, The Jesus and Mary Chain, Sonic Youth, and then on the other flip side of it was Britpop, it was Supergrass, it was Blur, some [Smashing} Pumpkins. But it was really shoegaze and Britpop. That was the big thing - this drony fuzz. [defunct London shoegazers] Lush was a big influence on this record. So those were the bands, and I decided I was going to make a fuzz-rock album, only I was going to make it accessible, too, because I want to communicate with people. I don’t want people to not understand what I’m doing.”
It definitely sounds like a record that doesn’t care all that much who likes it…
Which brings us back to the ambition thing.
"Well, you can have ambition and not give a shit what anybody thinks about you. You can have a lot of ambition. My ambition is to stay alive, my ambition is to be a cockroach, a survivor. Money and fame won’t stop me because that fucking kills people. When you boil it down to its essence, I was on a dark path back there. I was sitting in my car at 2 AM, pitch black, not knowing what the fuck was going to happen to me. The darkest it has ever gotten, staring down the road and saying that rock’n’roll has beat me down, and twisted me, and poisoned me. It’s done worse stuff, in fact, the only thing I had at the other side of it, the only thing I have to stand by is my wife, and my daughter is too young to know what’s going on. What I’m trying to impress upon people is that I’m going to survive. Like, an atomic war can happen and I’m still going to make art, because, in essence, it’s the greatest thing in our lives."
So, it’s almost like you did MCR for pop culture - however lofty that sounds - and you’re doing your solo stuff for…well, you?
"Well, it’s time to look after myself. It’s time to do something for myself, time to take care of my artist. Yeah, the other stuff falls in line, the mental health, the physical health - it’s all connected to what my purpose is, to be an artist and share my art with people. I’m taking care of that guy, you know? It is about survival, more so than anything My Chem did. My Chem wasn’t about survival - it was about keeping yourself alive and breaking through the bad stuff. But this is about getting through the worst thing and I’m still going to survive. I’m going to be here making music. I’m going to do it. I’m going to do it when I’m 50, I’m going to do it when I’m 60… I’m not stopping because it got too big. I’m not stopping because I wanted to end my life early, or crash a really expensive car when I’m wasted. I’m not going out like that. I’m not going to be a cliche. I’m not going to become a stranger to my daughter, I’m not going to slowly kill myself with alcohol. I’m not going to do it.
"It’s like I quit in the best way. Say ‘Fuck your job - I quit, I don’t want it!"
It’s fitting that a man who named his band after a book by Irvine Welsh, he who penned Trainspotting…well, chose life. Drowning in impotence, the car careering down the road, swerving blindly from oncoming traffic, Gerard Way pressed the ejector seat. For his family, for his ambitions, for himself. You might think that’s selfish. That Gerard Way broke up MCR to save himself. That Gerard’s making music now for himself, not for the moments. To be honest, the man who’s sitting before me, smiling, excited about his trip to Forbidden Planet once we’ve wrapped, buzzing off fans opinions on his new songs, doesn’t seem like he particularly cares. Gerard Way, see got, his life back. Mission accomplished.
I’m going to ask you a terrible question that I’ve been pluck up the courage to ask for our entire chat now. Do you think you’ll ever get onstage with My Chemical Romance again?
"That’s not a terrible question!"
It’s a really terrible question, because everyone you speak to while promoting your solo album will ask you that…
Gerard laughs. “That’s okay, too, because I’ve been ready for it since I knew I wasn’t going to do it anymore. A lot of these questions are flattering questions. They don’t make me sad and they don’t make me angry. I’m grateful people would ask that…”
Gerard sighs. “I don’t think it’s ever a possibility that that is ever going to happen again. I could tell you that if it was a possibility that it would definitely be because it was the right thing internally for me to do. But I don’t think it’s going to happen again. I don’t think My Chemical Romance is supposed to happen again. I think it’s supposed to stay beautiful forever; it’s a beautiful thing. It’s supposed to die young in the car wreck, is what it is.”
Gerard smiles. “I don’t think it’s going to happen again, getting onstage. If it does, it does. I can never say never. I just know that the way I feel about it is that it shouldn’t…”
My Chemical Romance are dead. Thank god they didn’t take Gerard with them.
WOULD GERARD CHANGE ANYTHING ABOUT THE SPLIT?
"No, not at all." Gerard says. "I’m super-happy. When you treat something with respect like that, and you preserve it, I don’t think there’s a greater gift. It’s like we don’t need to get inducted into the Rock And Roll Hall of Fame, we don’t need a Grammy. They can never take any of that from us - we have that. There are people with Grammys that are in shit bands, you know? They’ll go on forever and still keep getting grammys, but they’re in bands that don’t have what we had. My Chem wasn’t a thankless job, but it was definitely an unsung type of job. You didn’t get the awards, you didn’t win the Grammys… Kerrang! gave us a lot of awards, mind. But what we got was this kind of immortality that’ll endure. I can’t think of many bands who have what we have."
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