Freemartini

[freemartini]

I love you giant spider and her lame weak husband in Thailand

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I love you cicadas in new zealand

[freemartini]

I love you snails that live in Malta

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Help, why does tumblr have a tab that just says “luffy” then it’s pictures of luffy!?!?

[troosy-deactivated20180917]

[freemartini]

We are all the gym teacher and there is nobody to ask for help.

[freemartini]

This will never stop being funny. 

[freemartini]

I have virtually no clue who anyone I follow is or why I started following them!

[gaircyrch-deactivated20170606]

One of the worst ways to stop someone from telling sexist jokes is to tell him the joke isn’t funny. He’ll assume that you’re humorless and that he needs to save the good stuff for the right audience. If you really want someone to stop telling sexist jokes, you need to tell him, “I don’t get it” and then step back as he tries not to say, “It’s funny because women are stupid.”

If This Isn’t From a Book, It Should Be (via gaircyrch)

[freemartini]

synecdoche new york [movie]

I DON'T WANNA BE THAT GUY. :( PS. THIS MOVIE DOESN'T END UP BEING WHAT THE START OF THIS MOVIE MAKES YOU THINK IT WILL BE.

[freemartini]

Teen Titans: Trouble in Tokyo [movie]

I DON'T REALLY KNOW WHY I WATCHED THIS NOW INSTEAD OF YEARS AGO WHEN I STILL CARED ABOUT TEEN TITANS BUT ALSO IT WASN'T VERY GOOD AND JUST MADE ME WONDER WHY THERE WAS A TIME I'D SAY I 'CARED ABOUT' TEEN TITANS. PS. I LOVE ANY AMERICAN THING SET IN JAPAN BECAUSE I ALWAYS FEEL SUPER FLUENT IN JAPANESE BUT REALLY IT'S JUST THAT EVERY SINGLE AMERICAN WRITER THAT NEEDS TO WRITE JAPANESE IS USING THE SAME "I WATCHED A BUNCH OF ANIME THAT USED ROSETTA STONE FOR A WHILE" EDUCATION I DID SO HAS THE EXACT SAME VOCABULARY.

[freemartini]

Wristcutters: a love story [movie]

THIS IS A PRETTY GREAT MOVIE, THE PREMISE IS THAT PEOPLE THAT KILL THEMSELVES GO TO AN AFTERLIFE THAT IS JUST LIKE THIS WORLD BUT SLIGHTLY WORSE AND IT DID A GREAT JOB OF MAKING A GREAT CRAPSACK WORLD WITHOUT BEING ALL GRIM ABOUT IT. PS. GOB WAS IN IT BEING GOB, GOB IS ONLY GOB IN EVERYTHING HE IS IN AND THAT IS FINE WITH ME.

[freemartini]

I is an Other [book]

WELP, I READ A BOOK ABOUT METAPHORS AND IT HAS SENT ME INTO A CRISIS DUE TO THE FACT HUMANS ARE RIDICULOUS AND CLEARLY ONLY BARELY SENTIENT IF EVEN THAT AND ALSO MADE ME IMPOSSIBLE TO TALK TO BECAUSE ALL I WANT TO DO IS POINT OUT DEAD METAPHOR IN EVERYTHING EVERYONE SAYS. PS. ALSO IT TOTALLY MENTION THAT EPISODE OF STAR TREK NEXT GENERATION

[freemartini]

The Last Airbender [movie]

I GUESS THIS WASN'T THE ABOMINATION I HAD HEARD, I WATCHED IT ON A BUS AND IT WAS GOOD ENOUGH FOR THAT BUT I ALSO THINK IT WAS A WICKED DISAPPOINTING MOVIE THAT WOULD BE TOTALLY INCOMPREHENSIBLE TO ANYONE THAT DIDN'T KNOW THE STORY OF THE SHOW BY HEART. I DON'T THINK I COULD EVEN NAME A SINGLE CHARACTER IF I DIDN'T KNOW THEM ALREADY. PS. I MEAN FOR GOODNESS SAKE LIKE HALF OF THE PLOT HAPPENS OFF SCREEN WHY WOULD ANYONE DO THAT? WHY WAS THIS MOVIE 90 MINUTES LONG?

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Captain America [movie]

I MEAN THIS WASN'T A BAD MOVIE BUT THE WHOLE 'HAIL HYDRA' DOUBLE FIST BUMP THING WAS SUPER UNCOMFORTABLE TO WATCH, JEEZ. PS. HAS THERE EVER BEEN A MOVIE SERIES BEFORE THAT DID THIS SHARED UNIVERSE THING? THIS ACTUALLY SEEMS LIKE A UNIQUE IDEA THAT I'M SURPRISED TOOK THIS LONG TO COME UP WITH.

[freemartini]

Nonviolent Communication: A Language for Life [book]

I TRIED TO READ THIS BOOK AFTER A FIGHT BUT I COULDN'T PAY ATTENTION SO I GOT THE AUDIO BOOK VERSION AND LISTENED TO CHAPTERS WHILE PLAYING LEAUGE OF LEGENDS ON THE PREMISE EVERYONE ON LEAUGE OF LEGENDS ARE AWFUL AND SAY AWFUL THINGS AT ALL TIMES TO COMPARE WHAT IT SAYS TO. PS. EVERY STORY IN THIS BOOK SEEMS WICKED MADE UP.