French Kiss The TC

Hello, Teacher Crush Community! I’m Fleurette, 38 years old. My TC is Bob, age 60 when he died. This is a blog for my grief.

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A MINIATURE TIMELINE

March 2003: I turned 17

August 2003: My senior year begins

August 2003: Bob and I meet; my life changed

March 2004: I turned 18

May 2004: I graduate high school

June 2011: Bob died

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Hi:) Can you maybe tell us what your relationship was like after you graduated and until he passed?

Thanks for asking!

Between 2004 and 2007, we didn’t see each other much. When we did, it was a very casual and friendly relationship.

After 2007 we saw each other more, and it was something more than casual, but not quite romantic. There was a lot of sexual tension (on my end) that never went anywhere. There were times when we were talking without actually saying anything. Then there were times where we’d hardly say anything and yet everything was being said. I felt close to him in those times, yet at the same time, disconnected.

It was like once I walked out of those doors as a student for the last time, our little bubble that we’d built had burst. Our safety net of our consistent schedules was shattered post graduation. I believe that we wanted to make time for each other outside the walls of our school, but fear kept us inactive. I know that our age difference weighed heavily on him. It meant nothing to me, but I never could change his mind.

He was always kind and polite when he saw me. He was always willing to make time for me when we did see each other. Then one day I moved to Chicago, and I never saw him again.

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DAY ONE

“As I entered his classroom, I smiled at him. It was like finally coming home after being lost at sea for months on end. He looked wonderful.” -Fleurette, Journal Entry November 2009.

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“You left and I cried tears of blood. My sorrow grows. It's not just that You left. But when You left my eyes went with You. Now, how will I cry?”. -Rumi

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Friday 8 November 2024

Today is Bob’s birthday. If he were still alive, he’d be 74.

Happy birthday, honey; I love you.

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If I could dance one dance with Bob, it would be this one!

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Sunday 5 May 2024

Last night, I had the strangest dream about Bob.

I’m walking into my old high school. I’m on FaceTime with someone. As I’m walking, I keep telling my friend that I have to end the call soon because I’m going to be late to class. As I reach my locker, we end the call. I’m frantically digging in my locker for all the things I need. In my rush, my glasses get damaged. They are snapped in two at the nose bridge. At this point, the bell has already rang, and I’m late to first period. I’m very upset that my glasses are broken. I walk down to Bobs classroom and peek inside the door to get his attention. He steps out into the hallway to talk to me. I ask him if he has a hot glue gun or any superglue. He starts yelling at me that it’s rude to interrupt his class. He tells me that yes he does have that stuff, but I can’t have it because it could make him lose his job if we’re seen.

Now that I’m awake……WTF?

1. Bob would never talk to me like that in real life.

2. How would letting someone borrow glue cost you your job?

3. In the dream Bob was wearing sweatpants and a hoodie. Bob would never show up to school in something so casual. 😂

So, yeah. How is your day?

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I’m completely heartbroken at the number of states that are currently pushing to have all teachers armed with g*ns in the classroom. I’m devastated. I can’t imagine being in school right now. Are you guys ok?

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Dear Bob,

Why didn’t you ever try to teach me how to live without you?

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Notre rencontre a été un coup de foudre.

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Thanks, @flowers-in-hair-you-in-mind This was a lot of fun. I made a little version of Bob. Ain’t he cute?

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Friday 5 January 2024

Last night, I had a dream about my darling Bob. It starts out with us sitting in his office at the school. He has his back to me while he’s on the phone. When he’s done with the phone call, he turns around in his chair so he can talk to me. I’m telling him that I love him. I tell him that I’m desperate for more photos of him and details about his life. I’m crying at this point. I kiss his hand. Then we walk over to a tv monitor and he pulls up the “security footage” but it’s really just a reel of his life. Then I start crying harder and tell him that this was the time in his life when he and I should have had babies.

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Monday 4 December 2023

BLOGMAS Day 4

SONG

I think that if I tried hard enough, I could actually make every song on the planet connect to Bob in some way or another. He’s always in my heart, and I can see him anywhere.

The Christmas song I’m thinking about the most right now is All I Want for Christmas is You.

I truly wish that Bob was here and that I could spend this Christmas with him! It’d make my heart feel so much better. It’d actually feel like I was healed.

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Sunday 3 December 2023

BLOGMAS Day 3

SOCKS

Every year I go to the store Five Below and get a few sock advent calendars. I love socks! I love gifting myself with a new pair each day in December. This years calendar has a pair with flamingos wearing a Santa hat! I’m delighted. I can’t wait until I get to them. Bobs favorite bird was the flamingo. Wearing those socks will make me think of him.

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Saturday 2 December 2023

BLOGMAS Day 2

OUR WANDS

Last night, I was mucking about and doing research for a Harry Potter fanfiction that I’m currently writing. It got me thinking about wands and wand woods. That train of thought took me down the rabbit hole of wondering what kind of wands Bob and I would have if we existed within the Harry Potter universe.

I wholeheartedly believe that my Bob would have a wand made out of Elm.

ELM: Prefers dignified owners and is known for producing refined charms and spells with few accidents or errors.

There has never been a more dignified man than my darling Bob. The man was refinement and sophistication itself.

I on the other hand definitely see myself with a Walnut wand wood.

Walnut: Commonly pairs well with owners of superior intelligence; makes for a dangerous weapon if the owner lacks morals.

Is there a Ravenclaw more arrogant about her intellectual prowess than this girl?

There are many areas in which I lack confidence, but damn do I ever know that I’m brilliant!

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Friday 1 December 2023

BLOGMAS Day 1

PRECIOUS TIME

I was sitting here thinking about the amount of time that Bob and I spent together. We were together before school, between classes, and after school. When I first started realizing that I needed to see him so often, I feared, in the beginning, that he’d get sick of me. I never doubted that he was a grown man and that he could use his words to tell me to go away. I just feared that he might be too polite to tell me that I was bugging him. Those fears were alleviated one day at the beginning of the school year. One day my Mom told me that she had scheduled a doctors appointment for me, so I’d miss a small portion of the school day. I was telling Bob that he wouldn’t see me in the morning of the next day because I had to go to the doctor. He said, “Fine. Stand me up; see if I care!” That moment confirmed to me that I wasn’t a nuisance, and that he actually wanted to talk to me. In that moment, I fell in love with him all over again.

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I desperately need the TC community to explain something to me.

For the love of all that is holy, WHY do you guys keep saying that your tc is not conventionally attractive?

I need you to understand how disrespectful that is!

If I have to read one more post about how “this teacher isn’t conventionally hot, but gosh golly they’re good enough for me,” I just might vomit on my phone.

If you truly feel like that, do them a favor and walk away.

It’s you, hi; you’re the problem, it’s you!