hi! so idk if yall know as i've only really seen it on twitter but there was an agatha harkness book published recently where rumor had it, agatha was straight.
it's called agatha harkness: the fall of the coven by sara shepard and i decided i needed to get to the bottom of it and find out if she was straight or not as the author apparently talked with a fan and said agatha wouldn't be straight.
so i read it and yeahh... the rumors are true, she's straight but it ended up being worse than i could've possibly imagined. i'll repost my (insanely long sorry) full review with the entire plot and my thoughts below if you're interested in finding out what was wrong with it (a lot) but essentially the worst part for me was that agatha is NOT a teen like the description says and crushes on and kisses a boy who is a minor 😬
the plot:
Agatha is living in Salem in 1691. She has the appearance of a woman in her twenties because of a "powerful aging spell" (11) but lived through Greek and Roman times (55) so is actually thousands of years old (aka close to comic canon age). She is part of a coven but doesn't lead it as she appears as younger to the other witches. Agatha originally came to Salem (under a fake first name) through a portal to find a relic (later revealed to be the Darkhold) but has been hindered in her search by another coven member, Martha, who absolutely hates her because didn't want to be friends (12).
The coven is discussing the disappearance of Prudence Jones, a 13 year old orphan girl taken in by the coven (14). Prudence is accused of stealing money and hiding out in the village with her friend Betty Parris though the family denies seeing her (16). Agatha suspects they are lying as she doesn't believe Prudence would steal money. The coven (which barely has real magic) doesn't believe her and Martha specifically calls Agatha out for having a secret (18). Agatha doesn't know how Martha knows but she found the Darkhold (in the form of a bat, like the animal) in the basement of the Parris' house (18). Agatha runs away but Martha follows and has the bat so she and Agatha fight but Martha opens and portal and disappears through it (24). Agatha follows as people are coming after her and she wants the Darkhold and to save Prudence.
In the portal, Agatha sees a vision of herself as a VERY old woman before being ejected and finding herself dorm room that appears (based on the view out the window) to be Salem (27). When Agatha looks in the mirror she realizes she's not old but actually younger than she was when she woke up that morning: "My skin is creamier and smoother than I remember my skin looking in Salem. When I touch my hair, it feels longer, flowing down to the middle of my back. It’s silky to the touch, too, and bouncier, like a child’s." (28). She specifically describes herself as looking like a teenager.
After looking around and seeing a calendar that says it's 2025, Agatha commands a crow to explain to her what's going on (29). It tells her she's at a school called Conant Academy (30). She pokes around the room some more and is pleased by the advancements in clothing and bathrooms since 1691. After a minute, Agatha is interrupted by a girl coming into the room who upon seeing Agatha, says Agatha must be her new roommate (32).
The girl introduces herself as Ursula Greenwood and Agatha gives her name as Alice Harvey (34). Agatha is very awkward trying to explain where she came from and doesn't understand any modern references. Ursula mentions her previous roommate Sylvie disappeared a few months earlier. Ursula sees Agatha's cloak and reveals she's in a coven with her friends (Wanda gets a mention here and Agatha doesn't know who she is, 37).
Agatha goes into the bathroom and transports herself into another dimension to look for Prudence only to find her powers are a bit diminished (41). She's able to see Prudence but Prudence can't speak to her. The crow is there too and it tells Agatha Martha is in a form she won't expect (42).
There's a little interlude here where Agatha mentions a coven she was apart of in Transia and how one of her coven members named Corina was taken (55/56). This is a direct comic reference to the 2022/2023 Midnight Suns comic.
Eventually Ursula takes Agatha (Agatha is mildly horrified by the Halloween decorations) to the Headmistress who is very confused why Agatha is there but after the pressing of Dr. Novis, a new teacher replacing one who disappeared with Sylvie, Agatha is allowed to take the entrance exam (57). Just before, there is a freak tornado that the Headmistress and Dr. Novis don't seem bothered by as apparently it's been happening for a few weeks. Agatha passes the entrance exam by spelling the pen to write the answers on its own (62).
Agatha tries to adjust to life at the school but is very very bad at it. She wants to look for a crystal ball but she's unable to leave the dorm as she sets the alarm off and has to use magic to get out of it (64). She sees a weird ghost like figure outside but can't figure out what it is (66). She also performs a spell to let her understand most modern references (67).
Agatha has another vision of her old self, this time talking to someone named Firestar who begs her to help but old Agatha refuses (74).
Agatha gets close enough with Ursula that they sort of become friends. Agatha is introduced to a lot of people including Campbell Sweeney who is very much a mean girl and also a new student at the school (77).
This is where we meet the love interest. Agatha first says "Agatha and boys don't mix" (78) and then this happens: But just as I’m saying this, a figure steps out from behind one of the huge oak trees. He’s tall and lanky, with a rounded jaw, green eyes, and longish golden hair that falls almost to his shoulders. He reminds me of someone I knew long ago... The boy looks up and sees me staring. His eyebrows shoot up. A hint of a smile crosses his features. Mortified, I look away. My heart is beating so quickly. My hands feel clammy. My head is woozy. Am I dying? Have I contracted smallpox? I’m feeling so strange. Whatever this is, I don’t like it. I don’t like it at all." (78/79). Yeah.
Anyway, Agatha is invited to meet the coven in a cave Agatha used to hide from her coven in when she lived in 1691 (81). The coven has four members besides Ursula, Jamira, Francie, Evan (only boy who is also gay), and Ivy, the leader who hates Agatha on site (84). Ivy is suspicious of Agatha and tells her to go into the boy's dorm and get an envelope out of this boy's top drawer before she can be in the coven (89). Ursula goes with Agatha as a look out and it all goes smoothly until Agatha pulls the envelope out of the drawer and standing in the doorway is the boy from before who happens to be this boy's roommate named West (95). Agatha makes it back in time and turns out this envelope is evidence the boy is cheating on tests so they plan to get him in trouble (99). Ivy reluctantly lets Agatha in the coven as there's another tornado that whispers (and screeches) as it (Martha) asks where Agatha is (100).
After a weird interaction with Dr. Noris during Field Hockey practice (your guess is as good as mine as why Agatha is playing that), Ursula brings Agatha to the Historical Society where Agatha has a panic attack and throws up when she finds out about the Salem Witch Trials (116). When she's finished, West is there. Agatha ends up telling him exactly why she's there but he thinks she's joking (121). It's very obvious they both like each other (🙄) and West says seeing each other in Agricultural class will be a date (126).
Agatha asks Ursula about Sylvie and a note she found that says: "darkness is among us" and Ursula basically faints (132). They talk about West and how he clearly likes Agatha. Agatha isn't so sure she wants to go back to 1691.
The coven decides to play an Ouija board and they obviously don't summon anything so Agatha summons Marilyn Monroe. They ask her a few questions until the candles blow out and they realize the ground has frozen and the ghost is back outside except there's two of them, one girl and one man (144). Everyone pretends they didn't see them.
In Agricultural class, Ursula comments to Agatha that she thinks Campbell was in their room the other day but doesn't know for sure (147). Campbell steals a key for the door to the pen and blames it on Ursula. Agatha is assigned a goat named Janice who is very hungry (I swear this will come back later, 148) and Campbell teases Agatha and tries to hurt the goat only to be stopped by West (150).
Agatha and West flirt and West says that Janice the goat told him her name and Agatha's heart swoops (152). They keep flirting and out over the hill Agatha sees Dr. Novis acting weird (154).
West and Agatha go walking and she tells him essentially the truth about who she is and where she's lived but he still thinks she's joking (157). In a shop, a fake witch tries to do a love spell over them and Agatha runs away (164).
Martha's voice comes to Agatha in a dream saying she's right where she wants Agatha to be but she doesn't want to fight her yet (165).
Ursula and the coven force Agatha to get a makeover and ask West to the Halloween dance and he rejects her because he was already asked by Campbell after Agatha ran away (176).
The coven calls an emergency meeting because they want to teach Campbell a lesson (181). Agatha realizes she likes this coven a lot.
Agatha starts to think Campbell is Martha, especially after the cave is infiltrated by Dr. Novis and others who work at the school (186). The coven only escapes because Agatha remembered a secret tunnel from 1691 (187). Then it starts hailing and Agatha thinks it's because Martha is angry. Ursula knows something's up and wants Agatha to tell her but Agatha decides to preserve the friendship instead and not tell her (194).
There's an emergency school meeting the next day and the Headmistress connects the weird weather to missing students the day before and says there's dark witches in the school (199). The entire school is suspicious of everyone.
It's here where the throwaway line about Agatha not being straight appears: "Some of the hottest women I’ve ever met have been members of my various covens" (207). Like okay 🙄
The Halloween dance still coming and the coven drags Agatha to the costume shop where she gets a costume of queen. While there, Agatha finds a crystal ball and steals it (211).
The whole coven comes to Agatha and Ursula's dorm to get ready and Agatha spells all of them to have good things happen to them at the dance (Evan's crush goes with him, Jamira wins the costume contest, Ivy gets some self acceptance, Francie gets relaxation, and Ursula gets nothing as Agatha thinks things will work out for her later, 221/222).
At the dance West is dressed as a king (matching Agatha) and Campbell keeps complaining that Jamira only won the contest because she cheated and that they're all witches (225).
Agatha leaves the ball to check the crystal ball. It tells her the Darkhold is right where it was 300 years before and says that Martha is someone she knows and feels strongly about and shows her looking into the mirror with her class schedule in the dorm room (234). It also shows her that Sylvie and the teacher that disappeared are the ghosts she saw at the cave (235). West sneaks up on her and says he wishes he would've come with her. They kiss and Agatha thinks it's magic (🙄, 241).
It suddenly starts snowing; the entire area is covered in snow and the building itself is covered in ice (243). It's worse inside and everyone is running for the exits but the doors are frozen shut. Everyone blames the coven even though Evan is trapped in a huge block of ice (246). Agatha can't get Evan out with revealing her powers so they call for heat lamps and emergency services. As everyone leaves, Agatha confronts Campbell and accuses her of being Martha but she claims she's not and freaks out (247). The coven hears and turns on Agatha, as Campbell calls her a witch in front of the whole crowd (249). Dr. Novis wants to talk to Agatha and sends everyone out as emergency services come in but they can't unfreeze him (250). The ceiling is going to come down so everyone leaves and Agatha is alone with Evan so she's able to unfreeze him once she is true to herself and says she'll tell the truth (252). All her magic comes back and she takes Evan outside (255).
Agatha heads to the woods as she knows everyone will blame her for what Martha's done (256). Then she literally just sits for a second and thinks about everything that happened here and kissing West (🙄). After, she runs into the ghosts again and talks to them but they can't really talk back (259). Agatha says she'll free them if they tell her who did this and they run and take her straight into Ursula (261). Agatha tells Ursula what she's learned and everything she's been hiding (263). Ursula's actually pretty chill about it and says that maybe Martha's a teacher since the crystal ball showed the schedule and Agatha immediately thinks it's Dr. Novis (266).
Ursula and Agatha go to Dr. Novis' house, dodging the search parties. At the house, Agatha sees someone casting a spell inside and heads in (271). While they're going in, Ursula asks about the family's name of the cellar where Agatha found the Darkhold (273). Agatha says Betty Parris and Ursula's eyes widen as Betty Parris is part of the museum they visited. But they don't get to think about that as the door opens and Dr. Novis is there casting a spell (274). Agatha's jaw drops as she thinks she's found Martha when she's pushed from behind and Dr. Novis is confused to see her. In that moment Agatha realizes that Ursula already knew about the ice Evan was frozen in and other inconsistencies and figures out she's Martha, not Dr. Novis and Ursula slams the door on them, locking them in as she now knows where the Darkhold is (276).
Agatha tries to get out while Dr. Novis says he's been trying to warn Agatha about Ursula as everyone's said she doesn't seem the same as she did before Sylvie went missing; like someone took over her body (277). He also tells her the Parris' cellar still exists, under the museum from before (282). Luckily Dr. Novis knows another way out so they hurry to the museum.
At the museum, Agatha can't unlock the door and the search party is coming but luckily the crow from the beginning comes back to save the day and unlocked it for them because Janice the goat vouched for her (286). Inside, Martha has the Darkhold and she and Agatha talk instead of fight. Martha reveals she wants to start a coven with the Darkhold and force Agatha to return to Salem to stop the trials, like that woman Firestar was begging her too in Agatha's visions (290). Agatha can't believe she'd ever turn her back on the other witches as apparently she's one of the accusers (291). Agatha decides she'll never do that and begins to fight Martha. Dr. Novis helps but he doesn't do much. The bat Darkhold gets out of Martha's grasp and Dr. Novis catches it as more weather disasters ensue (295).
Agatha uses all the strength to open a portal and tries to shove Martha through but she fails (297). Then the whole coven shows up and helps Agatha shove Martha more into the portal but Agatha realizes it will take Ursula's body too and does a spell to separate Ursula's body from Martha's spirit THEN pushes her into the portal as Martha curses her (298).
Ursula comes back to herself and Agatha finds out Campbell did some helpful things and it was Martha as Ursula who did all the bad things that were happening (304). The search party breaks in so Agatha does a memory spell and erases everyone's memory of all of it except the coven (and West) (305). She also cleans up the whole school from Martha's weather magic.
Everyone is very sad Agatha is going back to 1691 and they have tearful goodbyes (309). Agatha says goodbye to West and again wishes she could stay as she kisses him (311). She also says this bullshit: "Will I ever feel this way about someone again? Will I want to?"
In the dorm room Agatha finds Sylvie who is fine, just a bit confused about who Agatha is, and Agatha says Sylvie saved them all as she grabs her cloak (313).
Agatha sits outside the museum for some time and Dr. Novis comes up to her and Agatha is confused he remembers. Dr. Novis reveals memory spells don't work on him and he's actually called Dr. Strange (315). She thinks she's heard that name but isn't sure. Agatha is even more surprised he doesn't want the Darkhold and then he leaves her alone. Then Agatha turns the Darkhold back into a book, vowing to stop the trials (319). But... the Darkhold is a fake, so it was all for nothing. Agatha thinks it's ridiculous so she makes the portal but then Janice the goat shows up and asks to go with her (I'm so serious, 322). And then they both step through the portal. The end.
the good:
I liked the 2025 coven! All the characters felt important in some way and they were a nice positive balance to Agatha. I also liked the overall outline of the story. Teenage Agatha plucked from 1690s Salem and put into 2025? Hell yeah. I also didn't mind Dr. Strange making an appearance though I figured he would've known who Agatha was. I also didn't mind that idea that Agatha could get a love interest (it was just the love interest who was the problem). Agatha losing her magic was fine too, I just wish it went a bit farther and had her lose it completely for most of the book. I also really enjoyed the inclusion of at least the backstory part of the Midnight Suns comic as it's one of my faves!
the bad:
Where to start... why was Agatha comic canon age?? The description of the book just said teenager but she's a full adult!! I saw some posts on here about how because someone else changed her it wasn't Agatha's fault she appeared to be a teenager and true but she was still an adult going after a minor. Honestly this was the part of the book that upset me the most because there was absolutely no reason for it.
Agatha's sexuality. I know everyone is up in arms about her being straight in this book and I am too but I another reason I read this is that I wanted to make sure that she wasn't bi since the author had said Agatha would be queer in some way. And she's definitely not in this book. The throwaway line about hot women in her coven is such bullshit. Again, no reason for it.
The ending. Why wasn't there a scene back in Salem? Agatha sent Martha's spirit back but what happened when she returned? I don't like that it set us up for all of that potential and then just ended when she stepped in the portal.
The animals. Why were the crow and Janice randomly such big characters?? I wish we would've spent more time on the actual 2025 coven (or West understanding Janice???) and not the random animals.
The fake Darkhold. Like are you serious?? That makes the entire plot not worth it.
Agatha's personality. I didn't include many quotes (for good reason) in my plot section but Agatha did NOT sound like the character we know from the MCU or the comics. For most of it, she sounded too young and whiny (despite her being thousands of years old) and she developed way more outward care towards the people around her than I've ever seen her do in any iteration. Honestly, she could've been switched out for another character and it wouldn't have made much difference.
what I would change:
Actual teenager Agatha. The annoying thing is that in MCU canon Agatha is 18 in 1693 (per WandaVision ep 8 script). So she would've been 16 in 1691 which was how old I think everyone else was. So why didn't the author do that??
Dr. Strange should've had more to do. Half the time he's just being weird and the other half he's literally just standing there. He's such a dynamic character and he was just wasted here.
Let's talk about West. He was so boring!!! I personally believe in lesbian Agatha (MCU AND comics tbh) but I wouldn't mind if she made Agatha bi as long as she actually was! That throwaway line was just bullshit. I literally have straight friends who call women hot.
Separately, I thought for a moment after the crystal ball revealed more about Martha that she was West as he had done some witchy stuff. That would've been weird but better than this mess!
So exactly, this could've been so much better if Martha or the person Martha inhabited would've been Agatha's crush as then she'd have to deal with it when they fight and that could've been more dynamic.
I would also have an actual ending?? And take away all the random side plots (I didn't even mention Agatha's love of French Fries or her delight over soap and indoor plumbing and dry cleaning). We don't know if Prudence is found or if Agatha had to fight Martha when she got back to 1691. Also how the hell did Agatha get old in less than a year?? She's meant to look young, or in her twenties.
final thoughts:
I am SO glad this isn't canon anywhere yall. Save yourself the trouble and don't read this absolute mess of a book if you're an Agatha fan. it's not worth it and you're way better off reading the comics or reading fan fic 😐