i’m so deep in the gay ships/ fanfiction of abbott that after every new episode i watch i genuinely get jumpscared when i see heterosexuality being displayed… QUINTA PLEASE! LET THESE WOMEN KISS EACH OTHER !
currently watching: well at least trying to finish ninjago dragons rising season 3 part 2 lol
currently reading: abbott fanfic, what’s new? :(
last song: fight til i’m good enough by the living tombstone
last song sang aloud: bing bong by bbno$ ft vnlla (vanillamace)
currently craving: boba 🧋
coffee or tea: uhhh tea i suppose?
earbuds or headphones: hmm earbuds but my earbuds pmo cause they constantly fall outta my ears so i guess headphones even though mine are too big and clunky
last place i went: this lady from my church’s house to look after her daughter and her mother
favorite chip flavor: erm i guess like jalapeño cheddar?
currently watching: Scandal (YES I KNOW IM LATE TO THE PARTY) and Abbott as always
currently reading: Avanine and re-reading a Boo Boo Cookie fanfic on wattpad called The Debutante *chefs kiss.
last song: Blow by Beyoncé
last song sang out loud: Love in the dark by Adele ( yes I can be a horny slut and a emotional simp at once)
currently craving: Iced coffee 🥹
coffee or tea: I mean c’monnnn
earbuds or headphones: literally switch between my bluetooth beats and iphone wires. I’d say wires ONLY cause it has a microphone that I love screaming into.
last place I went: Sephora and spent 100 dollars on two items. Do I regret it ? The Ava in me says hell no while the Jacob in me is doing backflips
favorite chip flavor: Hear me out…spicy dill pickle
colors that look good on you: yellow, green, orange, and brown…I guess fall colors ?
currently working on: Everything. I have like five Avanine drafts and one kinktober short rotting away in my Notes
tags (no pressure): @tani-b-art @avaniine @fuckthegurlz
currently watching: Dexter (nobody told me shit about how good this show was) and Abbott elementary (or atleast attempting to)
currently reading: my assistant it’s a megyonce fic by Megstallion consumed by weekndlust and any avanine book I can find also outside of fics I’m reading this psychological thriller called the push by Ashley Audrain (yes I’m a book worm)
last song: murda she wrote by Chaka Demus and pliers
last song sang out loud: make it up by Doja cat while envisioning a avanine edit to it 😋
currently craving: a home made chicken salad 😫😫
earbuds or headphones: um both it really depends on my mood
last place I went: to work (unfortunately)
favorite chip flavor: I love those lime hot Cheetos but the key to my heart is those hot honey cheez doodles puff chips 🫦🫦🫦
colors that look good on you: black blue red white idk whatever I put on tbh
currently working on: nothing cus I have no inspo for anything 😭😭
tags (no pressure): @murcielagatito @tani-b-art @avaniine
summary: Janine knows what the right choice looks like—Gregory, with his neat lines and quiet smiles. But Ava isn’t safe. She’s heat and chaos and the version of herself Janine’s spent years trying to bury. One kiss is all it takes to light the match, and suddenly, Janine isn’t sure she wants to be the good girl anymore.
a/n: My first AvaNine fic. hopefully it isn’t too off🥹 inspired by the song by lady gaga
READ ON AO3
Ava knows the game. Janine plays it like she doesn’t.
Gregory’s the checklist. Stable job, polite smile, folded napkin kind of guy. He’s what anyone would’ve picked for her, a man who hardly swears, never shows up unannounced, and always parks perfectly between the lines. He’s the safe choice.
But safe doesn’t make Janine’s breath catch in her throat.
Ava’s chaos in lipstick and heels. She’s heat and noise and knowing smirks. She doesn’t wait to be invited in, she kicks the door down, flips her hair, and makes herself comfortable. She says the things Janine doesn’t dare think out loud. She sees Janine, the unsure, overthinking, people-pleasing version, and doesn’t flinch. She pulls her closer like it’s thrilling to watch someone unravel just a little.
“You’re thinking about him again,” Ava says one night, eyes narrowed, one hand curled around a drink she hasn’t touched in twenty minutes.
Janine flinches. She doesn’t lie, but she doesn’t speak either.
Ava steps closer, voice low and deliberate. “He doesn’t make you feel like this.”
Janine doesn’t ask what she means. She already knows.
“You like my hair. You like when I show up looking like I’m about to ruin your life in the best way. And you love that I don’t care what anyone thinks.” Ava’s grin is sly, just this side of dangerous. “Don’t bother denying it, Teach. I see you watching me like I’m a fire you don’t know how to put out.”
Ava’s fingers brush Janine’s wrist. Just a graze, but it sparks anyway. Janine’s breath catches.
“He makes sense. I make you feel alive. So what’s it gonna be, Miss Teagues? Sense or fire?”
Janine breathes in sharp, like she’s been hit. Her heart is pounding.
Ava smiles, slow and wicked, like she already knows the answer. “Even good girls bleed, babe. You ready to stop playing nice?”
Janine doesn’t answer. Not with words. But the way she leans in?
That’s not safe at all.
Ava doesn’t move. She lets her stay suspended there, teetering in the space between want and fear, the air charged and unsteady. She’s not going to reach for her. Not yet. Not this time.
“You keep looking at me like I’m a mistake you already regret,” Ava says, softer now. Her voice is a low hum, less sharp, more intimate. “But I’ve seen how you look when you think nobody’s watching. You want this. You just don’t know how to want it out loud.”
Janine swallows hard, throat tight. Her eyes flick toward the door like she’s thinking of fleeing, but her feet don’t move.
“You think being with me means losing control,” Ava says, brushing a curl from Janine’s cheek. Her touch is featherlight. “But what if it’s just you finally telling the truth?”
Janine’s lips part, barely. Her chest feels like it’s full of glass, every inhale cutting against the years she’s spent being small and careful and predictable.
“I don’t know how to want you quietly,” she says, voice shaking, too honest to take back.
Ava’s breath hitches, just a little. Enough to prove she’s not immune either.
“Good,” Ava whispers. “Don’t.”
And then she kisses her.
Not gently. Not sweetly. Like she’s claiming her. Like she’s been waiting to do this since the moment they met and finally stopped pretending otherwise. It’s teeth and heat and hands, the dizzying scent of Ava’s perfume, vanilla and something sharper, like intention, and Janine forgets how to think.
She forgets Gregory’s clean lines and quiet dinners. She forgets the version of herself that fit in boxes other people built for her. All she knows is Ava’s lips, Ava’s body pressed close, and the terrifying, electric truth that she is absolutely going to fall.
And maybe, just maybe, she wants to.
Janine doesn’t know when the kiss ends, only that when it does, her lips are swollen and Ava’s breath is ragged against her cheek.
They don’t speak.
They just stand there, far too close, hearts thudding in their chests like they’re trying to be heard.
Then Janine steps back.
Barely an inch, but it feels like a canyon.
“I shouldn’t have…” she whispers, eyes dropping to the floor, voice already unraveling into apology.
Ava raises an eyebrow. “Oh, we’re doing that already? The whole Catholic guilt monologue?”
“I have a boyfriend,” Janine says, though it sounds less like a statement and more like a plea. Like maybe if she says it out loud, she can still crawl back into the safety of it. “Gregory is… he’s…”
“Safe,” Ava says, a flash of a smile on her face, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. “Yeah. You said.”
“I didn’t say—”
“You didn’t have to,” Ava cuts in.
Janine finally looks up, her face pulled taut with everything she’s feeling- want, regret, confusion, something dangerously close to longing.
Ava leans against the wall like none of this is bothering her, like she’s not still feeling the ghost of Janine’s lips on hers, like her whole body isn’t still buzzing.
“You kissed me back,” Ava says. Her voice is low, rough around the edges. “You could’ve pushed me away. You didn’t.”
Janine says nothing. Because she didn’t. Because she kissed her back like she meant it. Like she needed it.
And worse… she still wants to.
“I don’t know what I’m doing,” Janine admits, voice cracking, vulnerability pouring out like she can’t hold it in anymore. “This isn’t me. I don’t cheat. I don’t lie.”
Ava scoffs, a humorless sound. “You’re not lying to Gregory, Janine. You’re lying to yourself.”
That hits hard. Too hard.
Janine blinks, wounded. “That’s not fair.”
“No, it’s not,” Ava agrees, stepping forward again. Her hand finds Janine’s jaw, tilting it gently so their eyes lock. “It’s not fair that he gets the version of you that fits. While I get the one who burns.”
Janine shivers. Ava notices.
“You felt it,” Ava whispers. “Tell me you didn’t. Look me in the eye and say it meant nothing.”
Janine opens her mouth, but no words come out.
Because it did mean something. Too much.
And that’s the problem.
Ava’s hand drops. She steps back, slower this time, like she’s peeling herself away from something she doesn’t want to let go of.
“I’m not gonna beg you,” she says. “But I’m not gonna pretend this isn’t real either.”
The silence that falls between them is thick and pulsing. Janine’s still standing in the space Ava just vacated, her heart still racing.
She feels like she’s been cracked open.
A beat passes. Then another.
And then Ava turns to leave. Heels clicking against the floor, shoulders squared, mask firmly in place.
But just before she hits the door, Janine’s voice cuts through the quiet.
“Wait.”
Ava freezes.
“I can’t stop thinking about you,” Janine says, her voice unsteady but true. “Even when I’m with him. Especially when I’m with him.”
Slowly, Ava turns around. Her eyes catch the light, sharp and hungry.
Janine steps forward like gravity has finally won. “I’m trying to do the right thing,” she says. “But I don’t know if that’s what I want anymore.”
“You don’t have to be good with me,” Ava murmurs. “You just have to be honest.”
Janine hesitates, just for a second.
Then she crosses the distance between them, kissing Ava like she means it this time. Like it’s not a mistake. Like it’s the only thing that makes sense.
There’s no restraint now.
Ava’s hands are in her hair, gripping her like she’s afraid she’ll disappear. Janine’s mouth moves hungrily against hers, a confession in every gasp. Clothes shift, hands wander, the air thick with heat and need. It’s messy and loud and imperfect.