SMOKE & MIRRORS

theodore cohen. twenty five years young. currently engaged to none other than devon carter. var sc_project=11722452; var sc_invisible=1; var sc_security="3385eedd";

[dailygrantgustin]

Grant Gustin by Ted Ely

[fvckarchivetheo]

devon

wed. I mean, been there done that, bought the t-shirt, now we’re bound together for an eternity.

bed. he rides dick like it’s the ultimate sport.

behold that man has my heart. 

@devcarter

[thedancervaldez]

@fvcktheodore continuing from HERE.

“Old man? I’m only thirty two, you fledgling. Damn, even after being married, you’re still smug. Don’t ever change, cariño. Do you want me to talk to you in Spanish?”

[fvckarchivetheo]

“Like I said, old, so very old, Papi. I’m surprised you haven’t actually broken a hip, or you know? taken a tumble on the dancefloor those fragile bones fo yours. What can i say? being a married man brings out the best in me. Go ahead, I dare you. “

[fvckarchivetheo]

xavier knox, steve buscemi, donald trump

Ageing old white men just don’t get my motor running, especially when one has a face that resembles an overused, overworked asshole, sorry @thexavierknox And the other two? don’t get me started on the pompous ass, recently discovered lost member of the umpa loompa family. You know what? I’m gonna make like Henry VIII and do away with them all. 

It’s a blessing if you ask me. 

[fvckarchivetheo]

[medicisource]

[fvckarchivetheo]

text message ✉  bravo.

THEO: Wtf u take like seven years to reply

THEO: Do you text someone

THEO: ANNNNND then throw ur phone

THEO: Across the fucking pacific ocean.

[fvckarchivetheo]

text message ✉  wallace.

THEO: I almost just drowned in the sink.

THEO: like dead-ass drowned. I saw my entire life flash before my eyes.

THEO: Can you imagine the headlines?? a local hero drowns in the comfort of his own sink.

[fvckarchivetheo]

text message ✉  heikki

THEO: You know Devon and me, we want like a shit ton of kids, right?

THEO: obviously not for like another few years, preferably when our sex drive is non-existent, so we can fill the void.

THEO: but what happens if we have a kid that's allergic to the dogs, do we just get rid of the kid?

THEO: like asking for your fatherly wisdom here, Heik

[fvckarchivetheo]

devon cohen carter

I married the unlucky sod, so I mean, I think that speaks volumes on how I feel about him, you know when I first met him, and he was grossly coupled up, I was purely interested in getting the dick, and before I know it, it wasn’t only his dick I wanted to ride, but also his heart. On a more serious note, Devon is the one person who sees me, truly sees me, He makes me a better person, I could write a whole paragraph about what I think about him, and how much I love him because I mean? don’t tell the guy, but he’s pretty much perfection and could’ve done 10x better and landed himself a hot stud - what am I saying, I am the hot stud. Devon landed himself a one in the million, but to wrap this up? he gives great head and has a tappable ass.

@devcarter

[timothy--turner]

Send my muse a name and he’ll tell you how he feels/what he thinks about them in a few words.

[fvckarchivetheo]

lowkey/high key in the mood to RP, even though it’s like 4am. SO IF ANYONE WANTS A TEXT MESSAGE POST or any of that shit, like this post, and whatnot? 

[thedancervaldez]

What's something about a person you find yourself disliking?

“If they think, or are deluded to the idea, that they’re better than everyone else, and proceed to go out of their way to prove it. There’s a few people in this town like that.”

[fvckarchivetheo]

thedancervaldez‌:

“Oh…I know what this is about, sylicone sext toy. Is it because…I’m Spanish?”

“Silicone sex toy? Now you’re just trying to hurt my feelings, old man. English me, obi wan, what is this about? I hate to break it to you but you speaking Spanish? gets me all kinds of hot under the collar.”

[thedancervaldez]

What's something about a person you find yourself disliking?

“If they think, or are deluded to the idea, that they’re better than everyone else, and proceed to go out of their way to prove it. There’s a few people in this town like that.”

[fvckarchivetheo]

thedancervaldez‌:

“You’re fake, cream puff. Please, don’t act like you’ve never thought about it.”

“Only fake thing here, is your sex appeal, dildo face.  I’m a married man now, and your second rate ass just ain’t gonna cut it anymore.”

[data-reel]

“For half my childhood I was locked in a freezer so being helpful is kind of a new thing for me.” - Isaac Lahey requested by @bens-hardy

[hayesfck-blog]

casey-blythe‌:

bladememes‌:

Send me  🔥 + a word and I will write a NSFW headcanon for my muse.

[themarkvaldez]

do you and Enzo have a sex tape?

“Don’t get your hopes up. Then, you’d be Theo.” @fvcktheodore

[fvckarchivetheo]

Mark Valdez? humorous? well, I’ll be damned. And for the record, my imagination works pretty damn well.