Jan 21, 2017
Staying Pure: Mike Pence Is Crushing His Testicles With The Lincoln Bible After Being Aroused By The Feminine Contours Of The Capitol Building
It’s no secret that our vice president-elect is a deeply Christian man, but today, at Donald Trump’s presidential inauguration, he proved that the scripture is much more than just a talking point. After noticing the U.S. Capitol Building’s alluring feminine contours and becoming intensely aroused, Mike Pence atoned in front of all of Washington by seizing the Lincoln Bible and using it to absolutely crush his testicles.
Wow. You’d be hard-pressed to find anyone more committed to their faith than Mike Pence!
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