⚠️...Rant ahead...⚠️
WOW. I can’t even express how angry I am right now over something I can’t control.
I am just so unbelievably angry at the fact that I have a fantastic guy in my life that adores me, thinks I hung the moon, and treats me like a princess and I have no physical attraction to him whatsoever.
Like what kind of cruel joke is that, universe? You bring this fantastic guy into my life that literally biked to my house at ten o’clock at night in the rain just to drop a beautiful flower off at my door to make me smile??? And then you decide I’m not going to be attracted to him physically instead of to his soul? WHY. I pride myself on being anything but shallow, and I can’t get past him looks?
What aggravates me the most, though, is that he knows exactly how I feel, and still tries. He knows that if we got together it would be catastrophic, and I’d fuck him over emotionally just like I did to J. (Granted, J and I ended for totally different reasons but I wish more than anything I’d never have dated him.)
I can’t fall in love with someone who I’m not attracted to, it’s just not doable. I just wish it was. I’d be treated the best I’ve ever been treated, and the boy would literally walk on water for me. I guess I just wish I could return the energy he puts into our friendship (hoping it will turn into more).
Anyways I have stuff to do later today, so I’m gonna go ahead and go to bed.
Closing thoughts: I’m an actual toddler and life is totally unfair.
-Gemini 🦋












