Two roads diverge in a wood...
Fucking pick one Nerd
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@glitch-man
Two roads diverge in a wood...
Fucking pick one Nerd
Everyday of my life I think about the Metal Gear Solid 2 AI conversation because everyday I see some bullshit on the internet. It's fucking insane to me that in 2001 they made a game that accurately predicted the way people use the internet. How we'd be awash in information most of which is bullshit and how we'd recede into insular communities only leave it to argue with other people about how right you are and how wrong they are.
Shit sucks.
Something weird I noticed about subreddits that are anti-porn a lot they kinda self select into either being very male dominated or very female dominated. And then you notice trends among those two groups, the male-dominated ones tend to be more about trying to beat porn addiction while the female-dominated ones tend to talk about it more in a cultural sense. And, since it's Reddit, these spaces have a tendency to turn toxic or be toxic from the start, but they're toxic in very different ways.
The male-dominated being toxic tend to be more a generic flavor of toxic self help. Like those kinds of videos about how you should take a cold shower, or go on keto, or do something out of Atomic Habits, shit like that. The kind of content that's made to prey on men's insecurities about their lives. Usually trying to weaponize said insecurity or a deep feeling of failure or brokenness to sell them something, usually supplements. Even stuff that might be helpful for someone, such as beating a behavioral addiction such as porn addiction, tends to have very unhelpful framing that traps people in negative cycles of relapse. Not great stuff, but nothing too spicy.
The female-dominated spaces tend to be incredibly TERFy. On the one end, they talks about how bad the porn industry is because the porn industry is very predatory. But then you look at it a little too long and you notice they tend to be very anti-kink, getting really mad that any woman could be into anything like that. Then you look a little longer and you notice that it's not just anti-kink, but also pretty anti-sex. That there is this disbelief and offense that a woman could enjoy getting tied up in a sexual setting, and instead of dealing with that discomfort in healthy way they tend to just police other women's actions in a misogynistic way. And they hate men too, but that kinda goes without saying. The idea of something appealing to men's desires gets treated as ontologically evil in these sorts of spaces. And when you combine these weird perspectives on both men and women that almost always births intense transphobia, and these communities end up being rife with that shit.
bizarre stuff.
fondon't
Sometimes, when I engage with a thing aimed at younger audiences for one reason or another I always end up digging up the same rats nest of emotions afterwards. Like am I just getting older and am less able to enjoy things that I would have once been able to? Is that because of my age or is it because I've been exposed to more stories as I've gotten older? Do I crave more complicated stories? Am I simply less able to engage with something simple? Or am I simply afraid of being perceived as childish and cringe? Am I trying to keep up appearances? Or is this about self perception? Why did I get up in the middle of the movie to make a pot of Mac & Cheese? Was that the fatal error? Or is it just okay and there's nothing deeper than that? Are all of these a factor? And to top it all off, this might just be me anxiety spiraling about a kids movie and my inability to trust my own opinions.
Needless to say, I have some complicated feeling towards Zootopia 2
I'll be 100% fair here, one of the most annoying things is when somebody is a smug asshole, and they pontificating like the egotistical fop they are and they get you riled up because they get at your insecurities. And it's so frustrating because, yes, there are things I want to be more of. I want to be better read, I want to watch more old/obscure/non-english language films, I want to play more cool video games, I want to explore stuff I have never even heard of, I want to express myself creatively, I want gain more skills, and I want to have more meaningful relationships with people.
The thing is though, not being those things, or not having done those things yet doesn't make me a lesser person. I am not lesser because I haven't read as much as I would like, and even if I read more I might just compare myself to those who read EVEN MORE than me, in a weird dysphoric perspective on my reading habits. The thing is, the reason condescending dicks get under our skin is because we, in some regard, agree that we aren't enough and get mad at them for pointing that out. But the thing is we, and by "we", I mean me specifically, need to value ourselves and our perspectives without the need for external validation in order to defeat insecurity. I don't need to watch 100 French films in two months to value my own opinions on film, because then I'd be asking myself to watch 200 in one month. If I'm going to do that stuff it's because I want to, and I do actually want to.
It infuriates me to no end that whenever there's a video game that's a breakout hit, it's fun and super well made and sells a ton of units you always dumbasses that come out of the woodwork to say shit like "You see, just make good games and people will buy them." And it's just irritates me because there are great games that languish in obscurity because of one reason or another, weird artstyle, alienating premise, or simply having little to no marketing and getting buried underneath the forward march of online storefronts. And those games just don't get any press, especially since those breakout games, while really good, tend to either have developers who have a very strong and established community, or had a decent amount of money dedicated to marketing. And that the thing, you make an amazing game, but getting it in front of people is so much harder than you could imagine.
Men's issues videos
The hands down most frustrating thing about watching videos about Men's issues is it's coin flip on whether or not it's mildly misogynistic or dismissive and minimizes the problem. Finding an actually good video is the coin landing on its side.
At what point do you cross over from meaningfully engaging with art to consuming it mindlessly? At what point does it go from an attempt to engage with someone else's world, a way to communicate with other people to a way to kill boredom? I use Letterboxd too much I'll admit, it's because I have an issue with other social media and it ends up being the lesser of two evils frankly. I go on there and sometimes I see people who have massive watch counts, like 10 to 20K movies, like a hundred movies a month, and I brush them off most of the time because I perceive them as having crossed the threshold of engaging with art to consumption. I did a horror movie challenge, the specifics aren't important, and I kind of hated it. I felt like I had to watch too much and felt pushed into watching stuff at a pace I didn't like. I didn't really get to sit with and engage with the films in the way I wanted to.
I've been watching more movies recently though, but I've mostly been watching mediocre comedy films while exercising. In a way it's more consumptive than what I was doing with the horror film challenge, but I feel a lot better about it. In a way it's simply entertainment, but it feels like I'm meeting the films at their level. Does it make it better that I understand what I'm doing and choosing the films intentionally to be this sort of easy entertainment? I don't, but it all annoys me so much. I really need to have bigger problems to worry about, ones I can effect at least, ones that keep me off social media, it's frying my brain.
You ever read a review so titanically bad that you gave to make a rant post on a social media account you don't even use because of how angry it makes you so get it out of your system?
Joel Haver's review of Sinners is complete dogshit. I will be upfront here, I'm not the most ardent defender of the film. It was good, but I'm not in love with it. But this review is so bad that I months later am going to rant about how utterly dogshhit it is.
This is the opening paragraph to his review, and it is a stinker. It's almost a little hard to record how bad it is. I'm genuinely surprised that he thought this was good, that he read this and hit post.
I first ask, what is he trying to accomplish here? From what I read, it feels like he's trying is convey his perspective on modern film. It honestly torpedoes any credibility he has. It's like he's trying to position himself as this authority, a neutral observer with an untainted by modernity. It ends up doing the opposite, makes him seem blind to his own biases, that he isn't separate from modernity, just the other side of the coin.
It reads more like hype and lofty expectations end up ruining the film viewing experience for him. It is absolutely baffling that he pulls the move that every person that thinks they're more clever than they actually are pulls. Acknowledging that something is bad, then doing anyway isn't clever! It actually makes it worse. It shows that you understand what you're doing, and that instead of making an uninformed choice, you're making an informed choice.
It's the difference between accidentally eating someone else's food versus knowing that what you ate was someone else's. This especially bad whenwhat's being said is dismissing other people's opinions, essentially claiming their standards have eroded so low that they'll accept just about anything more than the bare minimum. It completely lacks perspective.
This is especially bad because he doesn't acknowledge a very common reason people like the film, cultural. Sinners is a film directed by a black man, staring black people, about black culture and the black experience in America. That doesn't mean everyone has to like it, but to imply that people are wrong to like something that is important to them because of cultural or personal reasons, especially if you are not a part of that culture, like he is here, that's really shitty.
I will reiterate, I think Sinners is good, but Idon't really love it that much. I also understand that as a white man I'm not really the core audience for the film. Everything isn't for everyone. It's more important the film resonates with the people it is for, my opinion isn't invalid, but it is also good to acknowledge that a big part of my inability to connect with the film is because it's about things I don't relate to and issues I don't face. I am not the arbiter of taste and opinion, some things aren't for me, and that's okay. All I can do is not be a dick about it and all I can ask for is people to not be a dick in return.
There is more to the review, but I've already spent too much time on this rant. Just because hype ruins movies for you doesn't mean people have low standards. Bad review, i don't trust anything he says anymore, and i didn't really trust him before.
You ever need to take a shit so bad your balls hurt? Or is that just me?
My Hero Academia
I have a lot of problems with this Anime/Manga. I used to be a big fan of it back in like 2016-2017 when it was getting really popular and the anime was in its first two seasons. But now I have so many problems with it, and that's not to say that it's the worst anime/manga around or anything. I just have a lot of frustration with it that I need to vent I guess. There are going to a lot of Manga spoilers, so you might not want to read this if you aren't caught up or anime only.
A starting point is a little difficult to really come up with so I'm going to start with the main character Deku.
Deku is not the best protagonist. Personality wise I think he's fine at least, heck I'd even say I like him personality wise. It's just that he is not well utilized by the story. His arc in the manga just seems to be gaining confidence and getting better with his powers. That's not a terrible arc in it of itself, but I don't think MHA does a particularly great job of it. In the whole of it it feels like the only real reason he isn't confident at the start of the story is because he doesn't have a quirk. And once he gets One for All the main reason he isn't confident is because he can't use it properly. This again really isn't a bad thing in it of itself. Yet, when put together it makes him feel way flatter than he should be. It makes it feel like his only real flaw is that he can't use his power properly. He doesn't have any other problems in regards to his attitude or personality. The immediate impulse for a lot of people would to make him darker/edgier, but he doesn't really need to be morally grey to be interesting he needs a flaw that is meaningfully shown. For example he feels like he isn't enough and in spite of having one of the most powerful quirks and the mentorship of his idol he still feels insecure and not enough or a flaw that is sort of shown he has, but it isn't meaningfully expanded upon until the Dark Hero Arc (and even then the quality of it there is arguable) he's overly self sacrificing to the point of pushing people away and hurting himself and others due to it. These aren't amazing suggestions honestly, they are just some examples of ideas of flaws that could be used to give him a greater level of depth. But also it mildly implies that being quirkless is his main problem and that is not great honestly.
And quirklessness in the context of MHA is not handled well. There are 3 types of discrimination in the world of MHA. The first that is shown is being quirkless, the second is having a villainous quirk, and the last is having some amount of inhuman appearance. The way these are shown in the narrative all have their own problems, but let's start with quirklessness. This is set up extensively in the first chapter, it is the initial conflict of the series. And it factors into the plot so little. There are three characters in the manga that were born quirkless, and all of these characters in some way get a quirk. There are characters that lose their quirk, but most of those are characters in spinoff material or literally just lost their quirk like with the last 20 chapters. Ragdoll being the only character that lost their quirk and has had a genuine emotional reaction to it (Also Mirio, but he got his power back). She is obviously upset because she essentially has become disabled, being unable to do something she was previously able to do losing her job and passion in the process. Which is upsetting in context, but being quirkless is only really shown in the narrative as a bad thing that people want to avoid and is tragic when it happens. In the world of MHA it is around 10 to 20 percent of the global population, for reference 10 percent of the real world population is left handed.
Why is all of this a problem? The story spends so much of the first few chapters on Deku being quirkless, and it is in effect a large bit of wordbuilding that goes unused for most of the story and the affect on the story is minimal. There is no scene in the manga where quirkless characters are discriminated against other than Deku. Deku doesn't see someone discriminated against for being quirkless and get mad about it. There is also theme that hero society is corrupted and flawed and quirklessness is never highlighted in regards to its flaws. Either for how they get treated or how the destruction of hero society would effect quirkless people. This doesn't have to be the biggest deal because this is a superhero story that has superhero main characters, it wouldn't be great if was just ignored all together, but the fact that two other forms of discrimination are highlighted as a bad thing and a core reason as to why 'hero society' is flawed. Yet is so unimportant in the grand scheme of things. And you can look at it as a superhero version of a disability and it cares so little about that. And I am not trying to say that MHA is problematic because of it and the people that created it and enjoy it are bad people. I'm just pointing out a problem I noticed.
But more about 'Hero Society' and the main antagonist Shigaraki. I don't really like Shigaraki all that much. He has some good things about him, like his power is interesting and his backstory is really good, but as a character in the narrative he doesn't really feel like he does anything. Shigaraki has very little agency in the narrative IMO. He mostly gets directed to go do things by other people or he does stuff that doesn't really feel motivated by anything in specific. This problem comes to a comedic crescendo when (spoiler) All for One implants a part of his consciousness into Shigaraki and effectively takes over his mind and body literally taking all of Shigaraki's agency away. Part of the reason Shigaraki's actions don't really feel motivated is because his stated motive is "the end of hero society" and like that is such a vague goal. The reason it is so vague is because MHA does a terrible job of showing all the corruption and problems inherent to it. He is being presented as being correct about the flaws, but misguided in his methods. But outside of backstory the only time before the final saga, which starts around 300 chapters in, the only meaningful time we are shown any of the problems that affect people are Deku being discriminated against for being quirkless (which as I said before doesn't really matter) and Shinso being disliked for his Villainous quirk. All of the other times are backstory (Which FYI is mostly just Shigaraki's backstory) and lip service that we are told instead of being shown. The only morally corrupt we get shown is Endeavor, who gets a lot of his absolute worst traits retconned a once he starts getting developed and also he gets a redemption arc. And then we are shown it so much more once we get into the final arc and at that point it feels hollow. This overall makes me not really like Shigaraki, he feels directionless and like he just kinda does things for the sake of it. Also he just feels overpowered at this point in the manga to a negative degree. And the whole "All for One takes over Shigaraki's mind" thing is terrible, confusing, and I hate it. All for One is a weaker antagonist, he has more agency but his motive is far more boring.
On the topic of Shigaraki getting his mind taken over let's talk about Star and Stripe real quick. She feels like such a utilitarian character to me. She exists to weaken Shigaraki and explain why the other countries of the world aren't helping Japan. I like her design, her power, her personality, but regardless she feels like she exists for a very utilitarian purpose.
Next up let's talk about Ida and Uraraka. They feel way underutilized as characters. Both get a decent amount of focus early on, and then drop off in terms of importance after the Hero Killer Stain arc. Ida only really gets focus in all of the various exam/training/mock battle arcs which IMO are too plentiful in the story and make the pace drag more than it should and take focus away from other parts of the story. Uraraka is similar, but she also got to fight Toga in the current arc. Both just get set up as really important characters before all of their focus and importance going to other characters, like Todoroki, Bakugo, Endeavor, and Hawks. Obviously both still get focus and are highlighted in arcs, but most of he big moments and narrative tension go to other characters. Honestly I like both of them, but it is a little annoying that they feel like they have been pushed to the background. Uraraka gets it worse because she just gets demoted to Deku's love interest for most of the story before her weirdly, I guess romantic is the word I'd use, fight with Toga. They get underdeveloped and underdelivered.
Toga is a character that is also underdeveloped and then she has all of her backstory dropped on you in a strange sympathy play. I don't hate the idea of her backstory as a way, but again it's just kind of dropped on you at a bad time. Plus her morality of being a literal murderer makes it kind of less sympathetic. The intensity of it all compared to the relative mundane nature of it makes it just not hit properly. It feels like her backstory of people not liking her because of her quirk and such is fine, but it is dropped at a bad point in the story and isn't properly presented.
This is similar to Spinner's backstory just getting dropped on us along with the discrimination of people with non-human appearances being poorly shown. We are told this is a problem, we are not shown it. The one exception being the one time the character 'Ordinary Woman' is discriminated against. She doesn't even have a full name.
Todoroki is overall one of the better executed characters in the story, but I am not the biggest fan of how the story centralizes on his family drama to the disservice of other aspects of the story.
Yuga is in theory a character I really like. But the execution on him is kind of bad. He is mostly a joke character with some moments of depth and bravery. But he is suddenly revealed to be a traitor with like one scene of build up like 100 chapters earlier. The traitor subplot being ignored and barely acknowledged for hundreds of chapters and then it is suddenly brought back up and ends almost as quickly. He needed more development before the reveal and more focus on the traitor subplot.
And then we have Bakugo. I don't really like him either. Not because he bullied Midroiya, but he just doesn't do anything all that interesting in the narrative. He does have some good hidden depths, him being uncorruptible and inspired by All-Might like Deku, he's far smarter than he seems, and he seems to respect Uraraka due to her performance in the tournament arc (at least as much as he can). And I will admit I am probably forgetting a lot of things about him to. But, I do think that overall he just doesn't do enough in the narrative to make me really like him as a character. He's like Shigaraki, there is a lot to him that is good, but the sum of those aspects doesn't feel greater than the whole.
There are obviously other things, the female cast is not the best written, Mineta, the fan service-y design of some of the characters, The terrible, terrible pacing of the last 100 chapters of the manga. At the least the pacing in the Final War arc. There are so many little problems that don't feel like they are that bad on their own and show up early on, but then they get worse and more problems show up later and suddenly all of these problems mix together and it just is frustrating.