[feraligatr]

jack of no trades. master of fuck all

[c3rvida3]

Every time my roommate open mouth coughs loud as hell and doesn't cover it, I fantasize about getting diagnosed with a terminal illness and, because I am so handsome, the Make-A-Wish program makes an exception and lets me have a wish even though I'm 29, and I use my wish to have a horse fucking kick her in the head, and then it turns out that there was a mix-up at the hospital with my paperwork and I actually don't even have a terminal illness. They made a mistake. What they meant to say was I have a beautiful singing voice and a fat ass and a heart of gold.

[c3rvida3]

I moved 750 miles away. She can't hurt me anymore.

[xanaxfarts]

4000cc breast implants :)

[mackie-ds]

[brblifuk]

[cosmic-aria]

[aariatov]

I don't know how to tell you this. But the wizard in the picture is canonically Saruman.

[metatextuality]

#saruman's big artificials vs. gandalf's big naturals

[orcposts]

going into work at the glue factory!

[orcposts]

STUCK

[orcposts]

STUCK

[orcposts]

STUCK

[lokaror]

Classic rookie mistake. Let me help you get out of the glue.

[lokaror]

Uh Oh.

[sistertaxon]

we need to bring back the word square like i don't think it's problematic that you listen to taylor swift i just kinda think it's lame as hell

[crossroadsbishounen]

[fliesinthescreen]

mom called me a fag yesterday by accident

[fliesinthescreen]

she was going to call me a bitch (playful) and i saw her gears turning like no but he's trans i need to call him the male equivalent. and then say fag and look so so surprised at the word that came out of her own mouth. it was like watching someone fail a disco elysium skill check irl

[fliesinthescreen]

AUTHORITY - One of your sons is being annoying to the other. Make it clear that you think this is unfair.

YOU - "Stop being a b--"

REACTION SPEED [Challenging: Success] - Wait a minute.

DRAMA - Sire, the word you're about to use is historically feminine! Applying it to your transgender child is tantamount to misgendering him.

1. [Suggestion - Legendary 14] Think of a masculine equivalent to "bitch."

[twoblogger-deactivated20260714]

[morxwar]

[x-deer-teeth-x]

do you think you’d actually notice if someone didn’t cast a shadow? or if their limbs were just slightly too long? or if they had just a little too many teeth? like how many times have you passed Something on the street and you just didn’t Notice It

[tornpyre-deactivated20191208]

stay woke monsterfuckers ur love is out there!!!!!

[x-deer-teeth-x]

yknow what? not my point at all in any way whatsoever, but I’m glad I could be an inspiration

[wormholeprophet]

I just realized that I could share this flash game ad I saved off of MySpace in like 2005 to tumblr.

It’s so important to me. It makes me feel like I’m losing my mind even after 20 years.

[aflo]

this is more y2k than 1000 gifsets

[sludgebitch]

you've heard of slender man now get ready for fat woman

[omnybus]

Slender Man and Wide Woman

[ringo-of-ringbash]

they are a dance gorp

[junkfoodcinemas]

Dune: Part Two (2024) dir. Denis Villeneuve

[rollerska8er]

He really said

[ringo-of-ringbash]

[fascinationstreetmp3]

i hate the “on average a user only sees 25 posts per session so they have to be good and varied” bullshit on that staff post. if i open tumblr and the 25 posts i see are nothing but a single mutual mass reblogging their favourite thing that i couldn’t care less about. well. that’s what i enjoy

[snazzy-hats-and-adhd]

If my beloved mutual needed to reblog a thing 25 times then by all things sacred I am going to read it once and then scroll past it 24 times as they intended me to!

[bruntalism]

[bruntalism]

[plum-soup]

I don't get the second picture. Why did you just post a picture of a bunch of normal English guys sitting in a pub?

[hiphopocliedes]

Love fruit

'ate snakes

Simple as