Trials and Tribulations of a Hydrated Person
Nothing like all traffic lights turning yellow as a torrential downpour splatters against the window while doing your best to hold a seriously full bladder. Managed to hit every pothole and bump in some cruel twist of fate.
I wasn’t stretched levels of full for most of the drive, which meant I felt everything. Liquid gently swaying back and forth, waves sloshing against slowly stretching walls. A fluid tickle from the inside, oh god. I’d rather be bursting over that.
Then the heavy rain–was it my ‘punishment’ for some queued posts? My username?
Water noises don’t usually get to me too badly, but the force of the droplets’ spatter and visuals plus the pressure and wave-like tickle feeling… Two thoughts repeated like a mantra: “I need to pee, I need to pee, I need to pee right now,” and “don’t you dare piss yourself.” I’m quivering, my bladder’s rippling, my heart’s jackhammering like it does close to wetting. Rain comes down harder and all I see are fat splatters and solid streams.
The urge to pee was intense and growing stronger as tea and water filled me further. All I could see and hear was water and ohhhh fuck me, that’s all I felt. Struggled to not rock in my seat. Thighs snapped shut, subtle squirming, toes pressing up and down for a distracting sensation.
Another curve heavy stretch of road bounced the sea of piss demanding out.
A contraction slammed into my wavering control. Closed like a vice. I feared I’d squirt a long stream if it didn’t ease. I couldn’t take it, couldn’t stop it… I started leaking drops. Half a gallon desperate to pour out with the rain. Alone in this battle, at least. My poker face is legendary and I’m wearing baggy clothes, so no one would’ve noticed how swollen I was.
(Am, because I’m typing a blurb out with a bursting bladder.)
We hit every single light. I cannot describe the frustration and desperation as they turned from green–“almost time to gush a piss!”–to yellow. “Can’t do another couple minutes, here’s some more for your wet spot.” The anticipation of relief dashed four times to six times.
About ten minutes from home, there’s a big hill and dip. Bladder rollercoaster, here we go. Pee surged up, down, and swirled. Please give me rock solid bursting over this overstimulation. Rain still falling, slowing the drive and torturing me.
The swirling got me and I spurted through clenches. Simultaneous embarrassment and teased relief. Sitting there trying not to show anything but normalcy as tiny spurts kept leaking out. Brief warm streams no part of me was able to halt.
Droplets and spurts are two very, very different things for me. Little drops are difficult to feel, but mini jets leaving my underwear hot and damp only encourage more.
The new goal became don’t leak enough to cause a wet patch on pants. There’s a grace period of small leaks for me before my bladder… splashes… and it’s over.
Get home without any other delays, take note of empty bottle and tea tumbler partially responsible, and get faced with the new guy doing the counters. Please no. Talk to someone else, my brain isn’t functioning at the moment, thanks.
Finally get to my room and start what was supposed to be a short ‘share and/or enjoy my desperation misadventure.’ About to sound idiotic. I didn’t want to inspect the damage once I checked pants were good. Piss brain isn’t an intelligent one.
I… had to get up upon describing spurting. No splash, but close enough. There’s no point denying I’m a leaker, is there.
Now to complete my daily intake. Just over a gallon. I stick to the ‘pee when you need to,’ not before leaving anywhere if I don’t have to. The pros and cons of being a water guzzler.
