Just trying to survive

31/she, female/Finland/ eternal lover of MCU, total dork for stucky and starker and all the things between/ do not make me choose favourite from MCU, they all are. (Okay, it's Bucky, but do not tell the others)

[samsbarnes]

my beautiful, beautiful makkari… did you miss me?

[thiisby]

My beautiful, beautiful Makkari… did you miss me?

[haysend]

Love Druig and Makkari ❤

[haysend]

Went to see Eternals, and well..

That is all I have to say

[haysend]

SHANG-CHI SPOILERS!!!!

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME

WHAT

THE

ACTUAL

FUCK

Did I fucking miss something?

And YES, I only just now saw the Shang-Chi and The Legend of the Ten Rings, because it was released on Disney+, fuck the world.

[cairistiona7]

I have so many emotions about the latest ep of TFATWS but man, they went and gave us that Wakanda moment when Bucky finds out he's free. I'm gonna live off that for a long time.

[moonykat]

"There has never been another Steve Rogers, has there?"

Well, Zemo. You're wrong.

There is another superhuman who hasn't been corrupted by the serum. In fact, you are looking at him right now. Bucky.

When Zemo said this line I realized this narrative felt off somehow. Because going by what he said before about all superhumans being supremacists and inevitably ending up down that path, it would mean Bucky is like Karli, or like all the other "corrupted enhanced individuals". And there's nothing farther away from the truth. This may get a bit long so bear with me.

After Bucky was first captured and tested on back in Azzano, he already had a version of what would become the super-soldier serum. It was the one thing that allowed him to survive the fall. If we take Zemo's words as true, it means Bucky had to have been already different (personality-wise) ever since then. So, did he become a machine of hatred and jealousy? did he start killing people left and right? No. You know what he did? He followed his best friend and kept fighting alongside him against the nazis. He may have had to kill back then, but it was war so what are we expecting. Until the moment he fell off the train, there was no indication of something "evil" lurking inside him.

I have an issue with the way certain storylines regarding the Winter Soldier have been dealt with. Starting with the "make amends" notebook. You make amends when you've wronged someone. But Bucky's situation is different. Even if it was him physically doing this stuff, it was beyond his control. HYDRA is the one and only responsible for those horrible things, and yet no one so far (not even his therapist) has actually told him that, or at least reminded him of it. The only person who has ever said this to Bucky was Steve, back in Civil War. He even owns the insult "my people" as if he had truly been part of HYDRA willingly, even if he acknowledges he was captured, he still sees himself as a villain. Those killings were forced upon him. And still, we see him making amends for something he had no say on.

The single moment Bucky regained a small piece of his will, he saved someone. He saved Steve. The first moment he was able to be himself again, even if everything was confusing and scary, he still jumped after this man and pulled him from the river. Flashforward two years, in Bucharest. Is Bucky doing something heartless and evil like going on a murder spree? has he joined any fascist group? No. he's buying plums, living in a small apartment room, and writing his memories on tons of notebooks, trying to cling on to the only thing that reminds him he was, he is good.

And now, with Zemo's comments implying Bucky too is corrupted by the serum... it doesn't sit well with me. I don't know if this is Zemo being Zemo, or if this is the actual approach taken by the writers. Although I'm inclined to believe the latter, given that no one has said anything against it nor corrected Bucky or Zemo about it.

Which I find troubling. Because Bucky isn't bad. He wasn't corrupted by the serum. He's still this loyal, nerdy man troubled by his past. He has never done anything evil by his own decision. Hell, the first thing he did after running away from the countries trying to kill him was to ask to be put on cryo again. "I can't trust my own mind. So until they find a way to get this stuff out of my head I think going back under is the best thing. For everybody." And even in this episode, when he asks Ayo if she's sure about this. She replies with "I won't let you hurt anyone." Because that's what he feared the most. Hurting those around him.

So, I honestly hope this was just Zemo messing with his head again. And I hope the writers manage to acknowledge this before the finale. Because no, Steve wasn't the only superhuman who remained true to himself after the serum. Bucky is too.

[haysend]

FUCKING AMEN!

[riricitaa]

🔥🔥🔥

[haysend]

BUCKY/SEBASTIAN

TAKE ME FUCKING NOW!

[buckybarnesj]

meanwhile: John Walker getting his ass kicked by the Dora Milaje

[haysend]

Best ever!

[smilecapsules-deactivated202106]

“He’s not my partner.” Sure, Jan.

[haysend]

BUCKY AND SAM FRIENDSHIP FOREVER

[fredy-carter]

Желание. Ржавый. Семнадцать. Рассвет. Печь. Девять. Добросердечный. Возвращение на родину. Один. Грузовой вагон.

THE FALCON AND THE WINTER SOLDIER EP 4: THE WHOLE WORLD IS WATCHING

[haysend]

No words. I wish I could analyze this and write something, but I can't. My whole soul is howling, my whole being is aching.

[leobabbyyy]

Three times Bucky Barnes almost cried, and the one time he did

[haysend]

Sebastian Stan..

I have no words for the talent this man has.

My whole world turned on it's axis after THAT scene.

Sebastian Stan.

[haysend]

THIS.

This.

This.

I..

Bucky understanding that he is free.

I have no words.

[thebestpersonherelovesbucky]

Falcon and the Winter Soldier: Ep. 4 Takeaway

Uh. No. No, I was not in any way, shape, or form prepared for that heart-wrenching opening. That raw emotion. The gut-punching fear. The devastation. The soul massive relief from under all that fear and pain. No, I was not ready.

“She’s just a kid.” This is why Sam should be Captain America. Look, no one can replace Steve Rogers. There will never be another Steve Rogers. But that’s not the point. Sam isn’t meant to replace anyone. He’s meant to be his own Captain America. A man who has the heart and soul of a person who doesn’t go looking for a fight. A man who will fight when it needs to be done. A man who reaches out with compassion first and fists second. Sam is the Captain America this world needs in these modern times and tbh it doesn’t deserve him.

“Those are our friends you’re talking about.” “The Avengers, not the Nazis.” Thank you for your contribution, Bucky. 😂 No, but, I really liked the our friends. Not just my friends, but our friends and Bucky concurring with that by pointing out who Sam means. 

Sam sharing the story about his TT. His family means so much to him as does community and I think that’s why he can relate to Karli and what she wants to do but also cannot condone how she’s going about it. 

Yes, if anyone wondered, Baron Zemo would sell out his family to the White Witch for some Turkish Delight. 

I do like Zemo stepping back into the more villainous role. While I enjoyed the humor from last episode, it never really sat right with me that they gave Zemo a “tragic” backstory. He was Hydra in the comics and it feels weird to me to change it in such a way. He was a supremacist so his new anti-supremacist ideals is…off-putting to me.  

“It wasn’t just one community coming together. It was the entire world.” Hence why Sam can understand Karli’s goals.

Sam assuming the leadership role so much in the episode. So much foreshadowing to what’s (hopefully) to come. 

When Bucky loses it with Zemo and Sam is like “Don’t engage. He’s just gonna extort you and do that stupid head tilt thing.” Not only is this more leadership from Sam it’s also showing how much he pays attention. He knows all their social cues. He knew Zemo was gonna do that probably before Zemo even did. In other words, Sam Wilson is remarkable. 

Sam calling Sharon for help. I wasn’t expecting her again so soon. Yay!!

As soon as John Walker steps on screen I want to punch something. 

“He’s dealt with worth. And he’s not my partner.” Look at Bucky backing Sam up while trying to play it cool. We all know you love him, Buck.

Sam talking to Karli. Coming to her from a place of understanding and genuinely trying to earn her trust because he does understand her pain. He’s filled with so much compassion and so much empathy and he knows how to employ both of them to better a situation and the world at large instead of coming in guns blazing. He gets it. And he wants Karli to know that he gets it. His approach to getting her to see that she’s going about it in the wrong way. But while she’s okay with acceptable loss, she in fact expects it, Sam is not. “No, it’s not a better place if you’re killing people. It’s just different.” Again, this is what makes him a good Captain America. 

“He knows what he’s doing.” Bucky’s faith and trust in Sam when Walker is literally itching for a fight. That…cold, obsessed look in Walker’s eyes was chilling. (I’ve given kudos to Mackie and Seb for their acting but I should also acknowledge Wyatt Russel’s chilling performance)) 

Thank you, John Walker, for coming in and making things better oh wait, no. Just come in a fuck things up. Super of you. 

Sam’s immediate “no” when Zemo asked if he’d take the serum if he was offered it and asking about Bucky being included in the “super soldiers cannot be allowed to exist.” “Blood isn’t always the solution.” Sam is just. I’m running out of words.

I’m now walking a thin line of patience with Bucky criticizing Sam over not taking the Shield. Like, yes, he’s right in that Steve’s wishes were not honored, but Sam is living the consequences wanting to do the right thing by giving the Shield to a museum. He did not and would not have ever handed it over to anyone to use, especially not a man like John Walker. Sam didn’t give it to him. The government did. The same way they’d’ve given the serum to a man like Gilmore Hodge. The same way they forced it upon Isiah Bradley and then experimented on him and locked him away. The same way they “agreed” that Sam was doing the right thing by turning the Shield over and then handing it to John Walker. This is not Sam’s fault.  

I could take hours of Ayo and the Dora Milaje kicking John Walker’s ass.

Ayo and the Dora Milaje. 

Did I mention Ayo and the Dora Milaje? 

I really want to know what Ayo said to Bucky there. After everything the Wakandans did for him, I can understand why she did what she did. She helped give his freedom and his mind back to him. I know Bucky only intercepted in that particular fight because Sam asked him to and he didn’t (not totally) want them to hurt Walker but. They gave him this place of freedom and his actions (breaking Zemo out, getting involved in their fight) did disrespect them. 

The Dora stepping on and catching the Shield. SWOON.

“They weren’t even super soldiers.” Oh, boo freaking hoo. You don’t need the serum to be a superhero, dude. And the fact that you’re basing so much of this on that plus your obesssion to gt it just proves you’re not worthy of it. 

“Power just makes a person more of themselves, right?” Vs. “Because a strong man, who has known power all his life, will lose respect for that power. But a weak man knows the value of strength, and knows compassion.“

Seriously, the expressions John Walker makes sends chills down my spine.

Karli calling Sarah. I actually thought she’d show up in person. Sarah’s comments about “Captain America” and her assurances that Sam is not working for Walker. 

Sam’s immediate protectiveness when Sarah calls him and Bucky’s worry on his behalf. Sam’s anger with Karli when they meet again and the fact that he didn’t argue with Bucky for him wanting to come rather than Sam going in alone. 

Sam and Bucky working together (anyone notice a lot less bickering??) is so amazing. I love them as a team. 

Sam’s face when he realizes that Walker took the serum. 

Quite honestly, if Bucky Barnes wanted to stab me with knives all night long, I’d let him. 

Not happy with them killing Lemar for white man pain. I’m sure there were other ways they could have had Walker rage out. 

That amazing parallel between Steve slamming the Shield down in Civil War to defend himself and Bucky and Walker killing a person who was just with Karli. 

Speaking of parallels, there was SO many in this episode. The serum vials being shattered. The bursting through the doors Shield first. The jumping out of the window with the Shield. Just wow. 

“The Whole World is Watching”. A quote from Black Panther when T’Challa did not kill Klaue, an actual terrorist. The title of this episode when John Walker kills a man who didn’t even incite his rage. 

And, of course, that final image. I’m still shaking over it. If there’s a better image for what America represents to the rest of the world, idk what is. I just want to cry after seeing what this man is doing with it. This is why he’s U.S. Agent who represents the “power” and “strength” and “might” of the United States. Not Captain America who represents the ideals and hopes of what any country can be. 

The acting in this is utterly incredible. The story has me reeling. My mind has been blown by each and every episode and I can’t believe there are only two left. 

[haysend]

NEEDED TO REBLOG THIS

This is perfect summary.

[haysend]

THE OPENING OF THIS EPISODE

HOLY FUCKING SHIT.

AND WHAT HAPPENED AT THE END.

I can't.

This series will kill me, but what a way to go.

[ourlovestorycouldneverend]

🚬

[agirlonline]

He has no right to still be sexy in that horrible, unnatural fabric, '70s gear. What even is he?

[haysend]

This man could be wearing a fucking trashbag as a dress and a cat as a hat and he'd still be the sexiest man to ever breath.

Welcome to my Ted Talk.

[hereand-whereyou-are]

Every time John called Bucky Bucky I did not like it. He needs to be a little more respectful.

[tony-has-anxietyattacks-so-do-i]

It’s Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes to you you disrespectful spoiled brat

[haysend]

WORD!

[mattmaesonnatural]

Alright James, why does Sam aggravate you? — TFATWS, Episode 2

[haysend]

THIS.

I fucking can't

Bucky is so afraid that he is going to let Steve down, that he is only a weapon, someone who is beyond salvation. And that kills me.