I wish u were here next to me.

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@iftheseascatchfire
I wish u were here next to me.
this is what it means to be human
Everything, Mary Oliver
The Breathing, Denise Levertov
A Prayer by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
The Laughing Heart by Charles Bukowski
Like a Small Café, That’s Love by Mahmoud Darwish (translated by Mohammad Shaheen)
Having a Coke with You by Frank O’Hara
Eating Together by Li-Young Lee
The Orange by Wendy Cope
The Quiet Machine, Ada Limón
To Go Mad, Paruyr Sevak
Our Beautiful Life When It’s Filled with Shrieks by Christopher Citro
Hammond B3 Organ Cistern, Gabrielle Calvocoressi
Peace XVIII, Khalil Gibran
Your Unripe Love, Paruyr Sevak (from “Anthology of Armenian poetry")
Here and Now by Peter Balakian
Ich finde dich (I find you) by Rainer Maria Rilke
The Thing Is by Ellen Bass
One Art by Elizabeth Bishop
Miss you. Would like to take a walk with you. by Gabrielle Calvocoressi
I Want to Write Something So Simply by Mary Oliver
What's Not to Love by Brendan Constantine
Where does such tenderness come from? by Marina Tsvetaeva
You Are Tired (I Think) by E. E. Cummings
Living With the News by W.S.Merwin
What the Living Do by Marie Howe
“I learned that being understanding for too long feels a lot like abandonment of yourself.”
— isa b. "blushed instead of bruised"
ᵉˣᶜᵉʳᵖᵗˢ ᶠʳᵒᵐ ᵃⁿ ᵘⁿʷʳⁱᵗᵗᵉⁿ ᵇᵒᵒᵏ 𐙚
— ʀ.ᴛ.
A person raised in love and another raised in survival, will never see the world the same way.
—M00wd
filling out a silhouette,
i fit myself into someone else’s skin.
although it never feels quite right.
anything to cover me.
anyone who has promise.
anyone but me.
i need to shield myself from this world.
nor the past or the future,
any “me”
has or will ever know peace.
i must become another.
i must.
i have to.
a fresh start.
a new identity.
i feel better as someone else.
haunting
I’ve loved those
who opened their arms
as long as I knew not to spill.
The quiet ones
who slept in my silence
like it was theirs to rest in,
never noticing
how much I bled
to keep the room still.
The loud ones
who needed to feel like gods,
so I made altars of my softness
and called it worship
because I didn’t know
the name of what I was losing.
I’ve loved
the flicker of something vast
not because it stayed,
but because it showed me
what it was to be lit
without setting myself on fire.
I’ve folded myself into smaller rooms
just to be let inside.
Trimmed my edges
to slip through doors
that were never meant to hold me.
I bent
spine and voice,
breath and wanting
until I disappeared into something palatable.
And they said I was easy to love.
I waited
to be seen
by eyes that only wanted warmth,
never wonder.
And I called that love.
Control wore kindness like perfume.
Safety was a room with no air.
And fire
fire always vanished
before I could ask if it would stay
when the flames died down.
They mistook me
for a turning point.
A fever dream.
The strange girl in the story
right before the hero finds his name.
No one asked
what it cost
to be the haunting they remembered
but never chose.
I’ve been
the bed they collapsed into.
The hush before their decisions.
The echo beneath their healing.
I loved in pieces
because that’s all they reached for.
But maybe there’s more to me
than what they could carry.
More than the parts
they found beautiful
when I was quiet enough
to forget myself.
Maybe I’m still remembering
what I was
before I learned to fold.
Or maybe I was always
just on the edge
never fully here,
never fully gone.
And maybe, just maybe
that’s where I belong.
TYLER POSEY ALONE (2020)
in my past life i was a pearl in an oyster
i'm kind of like if a girl was an empty train at night