not everything i post here is about you
remember that
i have my own life now
i write about that situation
because i'm healed now
i couldn't do it when i was younger
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@ifyoudontlikeitleavex
not everything i post here is about you
remember that
i have my own life now
i write about that situation
because i'm healed now
i couldn't do it when i was younger
you drink to forget about me
i drink to forget i dated such a loser
we're not the same
we were kids, but the love was real
someone who's afraid of losing you >>>>
you know i'd risk my life for you right?
how stupid does that make me though?
i would've given you the world but eh
i expect so much from people i mean so little to
so what do you do when you're the only one left fighting? where do you go? where do you find the strength to move on? how can you do it?
is it one of those nights for you too?
People always get their karma
But I pray to God you don't
You did me dirty
But I love you too much
To think you are in pain
I know what I said in the past
That karma will come and haunt you
I don't want that
AT fucking all
Never wanted it
I just never quite understood why you did
Everything you did to me
And the worst part was that you were okay
Maybe without even realizing it
It broke my heart
It traumatized me
It fucked me up
And I was left with no best friend and no lover
You were my everything
That's why I said all those things
I was a kid when I fell in love with you
I didn't even knew what love was
I just knew I'd give it all for you
I even had sex and I wasn't quite ready
I was young and in love so it made sense
Never wanted any other boy touching my body
Except you
In my head there was only one person who could occupy my thought
That was you
You were the centre of my universe
The stars lighting up my sky
The sun waking me up in the morning
And the moon glowing through my window at night
You weren't just a boy or my boyfriend
You were so much more than that
You get it right?
You are a writer too
You understand this
You feel me , you feel this
I'm not going to pretend like you love me or miss me
But i guess one day you did
I hope
I don't even know
You moved on so quickly and did it with no regrets
Shocked me, but I had to learn to be okay on my own
I've been good ever since
I can't really love somebody new
Because the amount of love I carried round for you
Was so heavy
It demolished me
And I was left puzzling everything back together
As though it was that easy
It wasn't
we're done , i get that
i just wanted you to text me
when u saw i was losing weight
u know when i'm sad
yet you never reached out
it was about one text
never expected to call me or asked me to hang out
but i was there for you when you needed someone
i came at your house to make sure you were okay
i even bought you a chocolate you bought me
on one of our dates :)
the oreo chocolate
i didn't give it to you
cause i felt so ashamed that you had someone
at your place
and i felt so weak and small
but that was stupid
i am so powerful for stepping over stupid pride
and my heart's full of gold
i don't regret anything i ever did for you
this has been (not even dramatizing) the most stressful, depressing, horrible, crazy year i've ever experienced.
i do not want to go through something like this EVER AGAIN.
please God just let me be at least okay, for once??? thanks
if i survive 2020 , i'm fucking dope man
reality hurts but you have to deal with it
i swear to GOD nobody understands my feelings for this boy, not even him and God himself
honestly, i never seen a future with anybody expect you.