*I don’t even use tumblr anymore, but I’ve been needing to get this off of my chest for such a long time, and I’m not quite comfortable posting this to facebook*
I fell in love with your best friend. That is why I let you do what you did. He was my first love, and the only person I’d ever slept with. He was the man I wanted to marry.
The first time you choked me was in front of two men. They did nothing, because they were more concerned with your well being.
You are a sociopath. But I didn’t know that until we went fishing.
You went fishing, really; me and Lana just watched. You caught five or so small fish in a town creek. They were too small to keep, but instead of putting them back in the water, you had other plans. You picked up the largest rock you could find and smashed the fish until they were dead. I was too shocked to do anything, and later was convinced by Lana that this was no big deal. Animals die all the time, those fish would’ve died sooner than later anyway.
The second time you choked me, you wrapped a wire cord around my neck, and three men, including my boyfriend, watched- and they did nothing.
The third time you choked me, three friends walked ahead of us. I told a Lana what happened as soon as you left my side, and she told me to keep it a secret in order to avoid upsetting my boyfriend, who going to be leaving to study abroad that week.
I finally gained the courage to tell the police what happened two months later, after Lana let me know about your alleged fetish for raping women. Lana told my abuser that I told the police. As a result, I was pressured to video chat with the him so he could tell me how I was going to ruin his life, ruin my boyfriend's life, and ruin my relationship. Everyone I considered myself close to was mad at me for "causing drama". For that reason, I did not pursue it.
It's been over six years and I still regret not doing something sooner. Not for my own behalf, but for those who are now at risk. My heart is so unbelievably heavy knowing that you could be hurting others and feel no shame, sadness, or any sense of wrongdoing.
theartofmadeline
kianamaiart
blakekathryn
germansingergirl
romaincrisis
stormborns
annaxmalina
