~ That's What She Said ~

[incorrect-lazytown-quotes]

Milford: Bessie!

Bessie: Yes, Milford?

Milford: Have you seen what the children are doing!?

Bessie: Yes.

Milford: They’re flying!

Bessie: It’s okay. I told them to be careful.

Milford: …

[sexycraisinthanos]

Robbie: And this is Sportacus.

Robbie: He's aggressively positive and uninvitingly friendly.

[sexycraisinthanos]

Sportacus: You ready?

Robbie: Let's do it!

Robbie: *Runs on a treadmill for 2 seconds before faceplanting*

Sportacus: Come on, get up.

Robbie: Can't, I'm dead.

Sportacus: No you're not.

[sexycraisinthanos]

Robbie: I just can't believe you would do this to me.

Stephanie: I'm sorry, I had no idea.

Robbie: It's called a betrayal of trust does that mean anything to you?

Stephanie: Of course it does. I didn't mean to hurt you.

Robbie: You don't just get me a gift out of nowhere and I have nothing prepared for you; now I look like a big old jerk.

Robbie: *storms off*

Robbie: It's beautiful by the way, love you!

Stephanie: Love you too.

[sexycraisinthanos]

Robbie, answering his phone: Hello?

Sportacus, on the other line: I miss you.

Robbie: I see you every day.

Sportacus: I know, but still.

Robbie: You literally called a minute ago.

Sportacus: I know, but still.

Robbie: We're in the same room.

Sportacus: I know, but still.

[sexycraisinthanos]

Robbie: Can I date a guy with a kid?

Glanni: No! For so many reasons!

Robbie: He's like super hot.

Robbie: *shows him a picture of Sportacus*

Glanni: Oh fuck yeah! You need me to babysit?

[sexycraisinthanos]

Sportacus: That is it, I am done with them.

Airship: Yeah, they take hours to reply to you...

Sportacus: Yeah.

Airship: You do more for them than they ever do for you...

Sportacus: I do.

Airship: They're not worth it.

Sportacus: No. They're not.

Airship: You're climbing down the ladder to play with them, aren't you?

Sportacus: I just wanna hear their voices.

Airship: Girl...

[sexycraisinthanos]

Stephanie: Want to play Twister?

Sportacus: Sure I've never played!

Robbie: Left foot red.

Sportacus: *Kicks him between the legs*

Sportacus: Did I win?

[sexycraisinthanos]

Airship: You know, you never listen to me.

Sportacus: Y...yes I do?

Airship: No you don't.

Sportacus: Yes I do.

Airship: No you don't.

Sportacus: Yes I do. Good night.

---------

Airship: Time to get up!

Sportacus: No.

Airship: SEE THIS IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!

[sexycraisinthanos]

Sportacus: [Can’t find Robbie in a crowd]

Sportacus: [uses hands as microphone] SPORTACUS IS A TERRIBLE INFLUENCE ON THE CHILDREN AND LAZYTOWN WOULD BE BETTER OFF WITHOUT HIM!

Robbie: [climbs on top of strangers' shoulders] SPORTACUS IS THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO THIS TOWN!

Sportacus: Found him.

[sexycraisinthanos]

Robbie: Why is your back all scratched up?

Sportacus: [Flashback to him chasing a raccoon after Robbie told him to leave it alone.]

Sportacus: I'm having an affair.

[sexycraisinthanos]

Sportacus: Look kids, I'm telling you...if you just work together and really start trusting one another you can accomplish anything.

Trixie: Boo! Give us actual advice!

[sexycraisinthanos]

Stephanie: Oh no Sportacus! Why is your arm in a sling?

Ziggy: Are you okay?

Sportacus: No worries kids, just took my training a little too far is all-

Robbie: He threw his arm out playing Wii Bowling.

[sexycraisinthanos]

Sportacus: Gosh darnit. We are going to do things my way.

Sportacus: With aggressive pacifism.

[sexycraisinthanos]

Sportacus: Being a freak is the best. I'm a freak.

Stingy: Is that why you don't have any friends?

[sexycraisinthanos]

Sportacus: I am incredibly proud of you, Robbie.

Robbie: Pft...what...ever...

[sexycraisinthanos]

Robbie: I’m the smartest, most skilled villain.

Stephanie: Are you stuck in the vending machine?

Robbie: I paid for candy, I’m getting my candy