Incorrect ACOTAR

Most jokes are not mine! All for fun:)

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Nesta: today marks ten years of me falling off of a swing at the park and this bitch ass kid said “what season is it? Fall??”

Nesta: I pray that he is dead every single day

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Cop: are you high?

Cassian: hello, am I what?

Cop: high

Cassian: hello

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Feyre: Toddlers are sooo unserious

Feyre: like why do you have a beer belly

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Cassian: damn girl there is something very wrong with you! I am captivated and intrigued by your distressing persona and ominous charm

Nesta:

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Cassian: don’t be surprised if you see me on your trail cam footage tonight

Rhysand: ??

Cassian: I’m just out being a little freak

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Nesta: my New Year’s resolution is to become even more cryptic, blood sucking, monstrous, and unholy

Feyre: wow

Nesta: and maybe tidy my room

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Cassian: ran into Azriel in the kitchen at 1 a.m. and when I asked him what he was doing he shrugged and said “these are my roaming hours”

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Cassian: *flirting* I had a nightmare about you

Nesta:

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Rhysand: Nesta, don’t let anyone treat you like an option

Nesta: wow that’s actually really nice of you to say

Rhysand: you’re inevitable - a horror beyond comprehension, an omen, a threat

Nesta:

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Cassian: don’t bite the hand that fingers you

Nesta: that is not how that saying goes

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Rhysand: Cassian just said I work at the “Dicksucking Factory” and when I pointed out that that’s not even a real thing he said “yes it is you work there” and refused to provide a source no matter how many times I asked

Feyre:

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Nesta: he’s a 1 but there’s just something about him

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Mor: I need a boyfriend who’s a girl

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Cassian: ruined Thanksgiving dinner by asking Nesta her body count

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Azriel: is the male g-spot actually in the asshole?

Cassian: 2 to 4 inches in, curl your fingers down and apply pressure for a short period of time … feels so good

Cassian: I mean that’s what I’ve heard

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Cassian: Nesta can ignore me all she wants

Cassian: but the voices in my head are telling me she wants me

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Rhysand: I miss your pussy

Feyre: it’s 6 in the morning

Rhysand: well what time does your pussy open?