incorrect musketeers quotes

these were all definitely said by the musketeers at some point. probably. (submissions welcome!)

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Announcement

Some of you might have noticed that this blog hasn’t posted in a couple months, and I feel like I owe some explanation. This blog began as a fun side project for me while waiting for the show to come off hiatus, and now that it’s finished I don’t really feel the need to continue with the blog. If there’s anybody who would like to take over and keep the blog alive, feel free to message me here or at my main blog. If not, then this is me signing off. Thank you for all the support, I truly had a great time running this and I hope it made you smile. <3

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What’s wrong with you? I mean, besides the obvious surface flaws.

D’Artagnan [to Athos]

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Athos: You think you're funny.

Aramis: Oh, I know I'm funny. Underappreciated, but funny.

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Porthos: You want me to flex and make all the buttons pop off my shirt?

D'Artagnan: Yes! You can do that?

Porthos: The challenge is keeping the buttons on.

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Athos: This guarding the King business is completely screwy now. You know they've reintroduced the death penalty for Musketeers?

D'Artagnan: Really? No, I didn't. For what offense?

Athos: What do you mean, offense?

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Athos: This, right here, is the reason why you have a reputation as a pain in the ass.

Aramis: I've cultivated that reputation.

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Aramis: Have I ever let you down?

Athos: Do you want me to answer that, or shall I just glare?

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Anne: It’s kind of cold.

Aramis: Here, take my jacket.

Constance: I’m cold too.

D'Artagnan: Well damn, Constance, I can’t control the weather!

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D'Artagnan: Athos, do you have to look at everything in such a negative light?

Athos: Could you possibly be referring to the harsh light of reality?

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D'Artagnan: So you're gay?

Aramis: Bi, D'Artagnan.

D'Artagnan: No, don't go, it's none of my business.

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Athos: Do you want to know how I actually hurt my wrists?

D'Artagnan: Yes.

Athos: I was hula-hooping. I attend a class for both fitness and for fun.

D'Artagnan: Oh my god.

Athos: I mastered all the moves. The pizza toss, the tornado, the scorpion… the oopsie doodle.

D'Artagnan: Why are you telling me this?

Athos: Because no one will ever believe you.

D'Artagnan: You sick son of a bitch.

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Athos: How do you sleep at night?

Milady de Winter: On silk sheets, rolling naked in money.

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D'Artagnan: I'm crazy about you. I think we should be together. What do you say?

Constance: Yes. No. Maybe.

D'Artagnan: Those are the three options.

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Porthos: Can we throw them at people?

Treville: No.

Aramis: What if they're rude?

Treville: No.

Athos: What if it's a member of the Red Guard?

Treville: Okay.

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Aramis: Let me explain something to you, D'Artagnan. When you're in a situation, you don't have time to think. So I thought to myself, "Don't think, Aramis. Act."

D'Artagnan: So, you weren't thinking?

Aramis: Not at all. I cannot emphasize enough how little I was thinking.

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Athos: Hey, what did Porthos tell you earlier? It looked really intense.

Aramis: He just told me to be careful.

Athos: He really seems to worry about you a lot.

Aramis: We're friends, and friends look after each other.

Athos: Right. I mean, it's for sure more than that. But hey, E for Effort.

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It was taught to me by my dad, my dad that’s dead. My father is dead. I have a dead father.

D’Artagnan [about his sword fighting talent]