Posting this here ‘cause no one would get to read this.
I never thought of what a closure would feel like. Does it go like those chick flick movies that made us cry and at the same time make us look forward to a happy ending? Does it feel like really getting a thorn out of your chest? Or does it feel like breathing again underwater just when you thought you have already made it out alive? I never thought about it, ‘cause I never thought I’d experience one. Until you.
6 years ago I fell in love with you. I actually forgot the feeling, but then you reminded me of it, all the laughter and the tears. Now, I would really like to say that I’m running out of words about how I feel, but then my heart seems to speak a different kind of language that my hands can decipher and type now. For the longest time, this was what I wanted, for me to know how you saw me and your side of the story because my point of view looks crappy and one-sided. After hearing you out, my head got more questions that I cannot seem to ask anymore because opening one door leads us to another, and I’m scared that I may not find my way back. Everything you said should not matter anymore. Everything does not matter anymore, nothing can change the past. I have no regrets, but seeing your face full of regrets kinda breaks my heart. This whole story of us feels like shit because it’s like the universe is always giving us another chance at the wrong time. Always the wrong time, it’s just messing with our feelings and our lives. I want to say I don’t care about it, but it just got me thinking for quite some time now. Not that I’m considering having you in my heart again, but probably the what ifs you fed my head.
But then, I’ll always be thankful for you having the courage to say your sorry sincerely even though I keep on insisting that it’s fine. I am grateful that you are able to retell your side and hear out mine. No more regrets now please, I know that we will be happy with someone else. Rather, I am already happy with someone else, I hope you’ll find yours soon. I am blessed to have a friend like you who always have my back, and please remember that I am always here for you too.
♥Bee
