How to: Be Awesome @itsfabulouspizza - Tumblr Blog

My contribution to the internet’s go-for-broke project of converting all philosophy into Trolley Problem Memes.

(BTW, the official Facebook page is in the process of posting some of these: here’s Ship of Theseus, Buridan’s Ass, Sorites, China Brain, plus more to come…)

(Extra info on what I was going for in the Newcomb, Simone Weil (click “Didn’t Get the Joke?”), “Innocent Murder”, and Smullyan problems. The rest can be easily Googled.)

toastbutteregg

youre insecure

dont know what for

amultitudeofsins

movemequotes

Once a little boy went to school. One morning The teacher said: “Today we are going to make a picture.” “Good!” thought the little boy. He liked to make all kinds; Lions and tigers, Chickens and cows, Trains and boats; And he took out his box of crayons And began to draw.

But the teacher said, “Wait!” “It is not time to begin!” And she waited until everyone looked ready. “Now,” said the teacher, “We are going to make flowers.” “Good!” thought the little boy, He liked to make beautiful ones With his pink and orange and blue crayons. But the teacher said “Wait!” “And I will show you how.” And it was red, with a green stem. “There,” said the teacher, “Now you may begin.”

The little boy looked at his teacher’s flower Then he looked at his own flower. He liked his flower better than the teacher’s But he did not say this. He just turned his paper over, And made a flower like the teacher’s. It was red, with a green stem.

On another day The teacher said: “Today we are going to make something with clay.” “Good!” thought the little boy; He liked clay. He could make all kinds of things with clay: Snakes and snowmen, Elephants and mice, Cars and trucks And he began to pull and pinch His ball of clay.

But the teacher said, “Wait!” “It is not time to begin!” And she waited until everyone looked ready. “Now,” said the teacher, “We are going to make a dish.” “Good!” thought the little boy, He liked to make dishes. And he began to make some That were all shapes and sizes.

But the teacher said “Wait!” “And I will show you how.” And she showed everyone how to make One deep dish. “There,” said the teacher, “Now you may begin.”

The little boy looked at the teacher’s dish; Then he looked at his own. He liked his better than the teacher’s But he did not say this. He just rolled his clay into a big ball again And made a dish like the teacher’s. It was a deep dish.

And pretty soon The little boy learned to wait, And to watch And to make things just like the teacher. And pretty soon He didn’t make things of his own anymore.

Then it happened That the little boy and his family Moved to another house, In another city, And the little boy Had to go to another school.

The teacher said: “Today we are going to make a picture.” “Good!” thought the little boy. And he waited for the teacher To tell what to do. But the teacher didn’t say anything. She just walked around the room.

When she came to the little boy She asked, “Don’t you want to make a picture?” “Yes,” said the little boy. “What are we going to make?” “I don’t know until you make it,” said the teacher. “How shall I make it?” asked the little boy. “Why, anyway you like,” said the teacher. “And any color?” asked the little boy. “Any color,” said the teacher. And he began to make a red flower with a green stem.

~Helen Buckley, The Little Boy

lynati

…

bogleech

I hate that I hesitated to reblog this just because I expect people to think it’s pretentious or melodramatic when it’s seriously real as fuck and I’ve witnessed it

misterhayden

john-maghirang-deactivated20130

Dear Future Girlfriend,

I’m going to make you a sandwich.

This seems retarded, right?

See, to most guys, it’s usually the other way around.

But no. I’m not like that.

I want to prove to you that I’m not like the sexist guys out there in this world.

You don’t belong in a kitchen, because you belong in my heart.

Sincerely,

Me.

fruitpunchg-deactivated20150226

mightyriot-deactivated20200122

I must decline, for secret reasons.

kylos

Emilia Clarke’s last day of shooting Game of Thrones

littl3-lion3ss

Nooooo… don’t break this ball of positivity…😭

tiktokarchive

Fortune Teller: I see flames, and five- no- seven skeletons carrying your body away, as a murder of crows flies over your head.

Customer: Is that good?

Fortune Teller: No idea. But it looks- [mouth clicks twice] like, super badass.

notlindsay

alright so who wants to fall in love with me

notlindsay

this is unbelievable I have to do everything myself

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ratsouped

Every time you mock the appearance of a bad person, there's a good person out there with a similar appearance that hears you and feels awful. If you want to criticize a person, criticize what's actually bad about them, not their superficial looks.