It was peace and love

In 1974, Eddie Munson stumbles into the adventure of a lifetime. The Wylde Hearts are about to start their very first ever tour across the US and be thrown into a life of Sex, Drugs and good old Rock n' Roll. Eddie never planned on being a part of this but one thing leads to another and before he knows it, he's huddled on a tiny bus with a bunch of wannabe rockstars and a girl that makes his heart do crazy things. Will this trip be the begining of something great or end up in heartbreak ?

[itwassomethingwild]

Series Masterlist

Eddie joins the California rock band The Wylde Hearts on their first ever US tour as a roadie. Life happens. Love happens. Hearts breaks and are put back together.

A 1970s AU inspired by the movie Almost Famous and the book Daisy Jones and the Six.

Chapters:

Hawkins or  “That is who I am and who I want to be.”

[itwassomethingwild]

It was something wild // One

One: Hawkins or  “That is who I am and who I want to be.”

Synopsis: this is a 1970s AU inspired by the movie Almost Famous and the book Daisy Jones and the Six. 

Eddie joins the California rock band The Wylde Hearts on their first ever US tour as a roadie. Life happens. Love happens. Hearts breaks and are put back together. 

[additional note: I am German. Sometimes I get the tense wrong or make mistakes. I am useless when it comes to punctuation. Go easy on me, please. This used to be a Billy Hargrove story but I decided Eddie works so much better.] 

One voice tryin' to be heard Round peg livin' in a square world We were strangers in a strange land We were reaching for the upper hand We were hard to understand

It was juvenile, It was something wild, Part of every child, Yeah, you had to be there

It was rough and tough, It was peace and love, All of the above, Yeah, you had to be there 

The sun is softly setting behind the horizon, painting the Indiana sky in hues of orange and gold. Leftover heat from the humid summer day still lingers in the air like unspoken words between former lovers. 

There’s a crowd of people hanging around in front of the Loud Room, a little music venue nestled somewhere in the middle of nowhere between Hawkins and Indianapolis. Most of them holding onto a bottle of beer, pretty much all of them smoking a cigarette or a blunt.

Eddie knows this is an objectively bad idea. He knew it the moment he realized the concert was sold out. Knew it when his mind conjured up the idea of going anyway. He knew it every second of every minute that it took him to drive here. And yet here he is, pushing through the mass of people in search of the back entrance.

“ The back entrance? “ Dustin’s voice rings out from behind him. He throws the young boy a fleeting look across his shoulder. God, the smell of pot is gonna linger on his clothes forever. If they survive this night, Eddie thinks, Steve is gonna have his head on a spike. There’s no way they’ll get away with this without him finding out. Not that he’s particularly worried about what Steve thinks of him usually. It’s only when it comes to Dustin, the kid that involuntarily wormed his way into both of their hearts and turned them into honorary older brothers, that he gives a shit about Steve’s opinion. He’s gonna lose metaphorical custody for the kid, he just knows it.

“ Yes, the back entrance. “ 

“ Not to be uh — ungrateful or anything. But why can’t we use the front? You know, like normal people?”

“ Because you’re 15, you’re not even supposed to be here, “ Eddie replies then stops in his tracks for a second, facing the younger boy. His curls messily frame his face but there’s a certain structure to it tonight. A regulated chaos. He put in effort today. And Dustin never makes an effort if it doesn’t mean something to him. 

So it does mean something to him, being here tonight, and that alone is reason enough for Eddie to go through all this effort. 

“ And no offense, but there’s no way the bouncer is gonna take a look at you and not send your ass back home immediately.” 

What he doesn’t tell him is that, technically, he isn’t supposed to be here either. Not because of his age or anything like that. It’s just that they have no tickets and today’s gig has been sold out for months.

But when all his borderline adopted brother wants for his 15th birthday is to go to a local concert of some up and coming rock band, who is he to say no? Especially when the band fucking kills it.  Steve would’ve taken him, there’s no doubt in Eddies mind. But Steve, bless his heart, doesn’t know shit about music. Your first gig, that’s something you’ll remember for the rest of your life. That’s something special, something you should experience with someone else who understands. And if there’s one thing Eddie Munson understands, it’s the magic that comes to life at a concert. When you’re part of a crowd, surrounded by strangers, but for a little while you’re all sharing the same feelings. It makes the earth seem just a little less big and scary. If a song can bring us together, how bad can the word really be, huh? 

Obviously he doesn’t tell Dustin all of that, he still has an image to maintain. And anyway, he’ll figure all that out himself soon enough, who is he to take that epiphany away from him.

“ Could’ve just gotten a fake ID, but alright. Suit yourself “

“ Will you shut up, Henderson? I can turn around right now and go back home, leave you here by yourself. You want that? “ 

He raises his hands in mock defeat, in that stubborn teenage way that’s supposed to look so nonchalant and overdramatic at the same time. As if it doesn’t matter to him and it’s all just one big game. He cares though, it matters. Kid has been talking about this night for weeks. 

Without another word, they push further through the crowd, walk past the entrance and around the corner until eventually, they end up at the back door. It’s the one where the tour buses arrive and leave through. If there’s any chance for the both of them to get into this place tonight, this is their best guess.

“ Okay, cool there’s the back door. Now what? “

Unfortunately, finding the back entrance is as far as Eddie has planned ahead. 

“ Guess we just — knock? “ 

“ You guess? Jesus Christ, I thought you had a plan. “

“ This was my plan.” 

“ Walking around the building? Genius. “ 

“ Look,” Eddie says and sighs in exasperation, “ we’ll just knock and see who answers. Alright? I’m a pretty good talker, people think I’m charming. “ 

“ A good talker? Eddie no offense but just because you talk a lot and don’t know when to shut up, doesn’t make you a good talker. “ 

“ You wanna get in or not, Henderson?” 

Dustin nods swiftly, making his curls dance around his head. “ I do, I really do.” 

There’s commotion coming from inside, Eddie can hear it even through the heavy metal door. The band’s supposed to go on at 9 but honestly who knows with these rockstars. Eddie admires them, really. To do as you please without having to confine to what anyone else thinks of you. To live life on your own terms. To be free. To be — fucking invincible. To create music, create art, that brings people together even if it’s just for one fleeting moment. The idea of that sounds pretty fucking sweet.

His fist meets the door once, twice, three times. No reaction, no answer.

Dustin is getting antsy, he can tell. He’s shuffling from one foot to the other, crossing and uncrossing his arms nervously. For being so sassy most of the time, there’s a real softness to him in moments like this. The kid has a big mouth and an even bigger ego, but instead of making him unlikable, it makes him endearing. He’s a smartass and sometimes he sounds way older than he is. It’s moments like the one right now that remind Eddie that he is just a kid after all. A kid as Eddie used to be once. Innocent and passionate about his interests and eager to see everything the world has to offer. He just hoped the world decides to be a little more kind to Dustin. He hopes Hawkins doesn’t rip out his heart and make him watch it wither away — not like it did to Eddie.

Just as he’s about to knock again, the door swings open, almost hitting him straight in the face. Before him, looking just as startled as he must look, stands a girl with curly brown hair, the most obnoxiously orange blouse he’s ever seen and a big camera hanging around her neck.

“ Holy shit, almost had a heart attack there. “ she says and places a hand against her chest. “ Whatcha doin’ here, man. This is the artist’s entrance. “ 

To say it is the artist’s entrance is a bit far fetched, Eddie thinks. Sure, this is where the buses and the bands go in and out but whenever there are no shows being played this is also where the employees hang out and smoke during their breaks, he knows this for — reasons.

“ You planning on sneaking in or something? “ the girl inquires as she steps out into the night, letting the heavy door fall closed behind her.

“ I uh — no.”

“ Cause if you were, I’d just like to let you know that I’ll go back inside in just a minute which means that if you’re quick enough you can probably slip inside behind me. Just — ya know, something to consider. “ 

“ Are you sure that’s okay? “ A nervous Dustin speaks up, a mix between excitement and anxiety flooding his voice. 

“ Oh yeah! Geoff, the guy who owns the venue, is a real asshole. Hardly gives the band a cut of the ticket sales. So fuck him, if you wanna hear the band play just follow me back inside in a minute. “ 

“ You’re not part of the band ?” Eddie asks. It’s not like he hasn’t heard of The Wylde Hearts before, but they are up and coming, hardly big enough to be featured in any music magazine yet. And anyway, he doesn’t care about affairs and fights between bandmates and bullshit gossip that’s not even half true most of the time. Eddie is in it for the music and the way it makes him feel, that’s it. 

“ Oh no, honey. I’m their personal photographer. My name is Lucy, “ she says and holds out a hand to him. Her fingernails are painted a vibrant yellow and there’s gold hoop bangles covering pretty much her entire lower arm. She looks like some kind of goddess, Eddie thinks. The gold against the dark of her skin makes her look — glowing almost. She’s cute and if it wasn’t for Dustin being right there, he would totally try to win this girl over and maybe get into her, very short, denim skirt.

“ Eddie, “ he replies, then pointing to the younger boy who’s still trailing a bit behind, visibly uncertain about this whole situation. “ That’s Dustin. “

“ It's my first ever concert tonight”.

“ Really ? That’s special! It’s nice to — “ Lucy’s eyes suddenly grow in size, a sudden twinkle overtaking them completely.

 “ Holy shit! “  Pushing past both him and Dustin, she lets out a squeal so high, it sounds like something not meant for the human ear. It’s a fucking dog-whistle of a squeal. It reminds him of the cheerleader’s table back in high school. All short skirts and giggles. 

When Eddie turns around to see what brought on the sudden outburst, Lucy has her arms wrapped tightly around another person, swaying side to side in pure excitement. At least Eddie thinks it’s another person, all he can really make out is a big fluffy red fur coat. 

Lucy’s bangles and the other person’s heels create a harmony of beautiful chaos against the quiet of the night. Their bright outfits throw colors onto a black canvas. It’s messy and anarchic. Even though he can’t see one of them and has only spent about 5 minutes with the other, there’s something about these two and the energy they exude. 

The girls stop swaying, a silence settles upon them and Lucy pulls away, giving Eddie an unobscured view of the other person. The girl that stands before him now, Eddie is convinced, can not be real. There’s no way, she is real. Nothing about her makes sense and yet it all seems so perfectly put together. She’s chaos and harmony. The bright red fur coat seems to swallow her whole, she’s wearing sunglasses even though it’s dark out and her platform heels are covered in glitter. Nothing matches but somehow it seems to work on her. 

“ Will you stop staring, you creep ?” 

She pulls down the big chunky sunglasses so they rest on the bridge of her nose, and glances at him over the top of the lenses. Her eyes look right back into his, determined and honest. Something about the way she looks at him draws him in. It makes him want to never look away in fear of missing something.

Whoever she is, everything about her demands to be seen. To be noticed. To be appreciated. 

“ I asked you a question? “ 

“ Huh ?” 

“ Oh please, leave the poor boy alone “ Lucy speaks up before linking arms with the other girl, almost getting swallowed by her coat as well. “ He’s and his brother are our special guests today. We’ll sneak them in “.

“ We will ?” 

“ Yes, Geoff has lowered our cut on the ticket sales again so — “ 

“ What a fucking asshole. Alright, let’s go. I need a drink.” 

She doesn’t walk, she struts. She marches towards the door as if this parking lot, this world, it’s her stage and hers alone. Her knocks, they don’t fall of deaf ears. They don’t go unanswered like Eddie’s did. 

The door opens immediately as if the people inside have only been waiting for her. Maybe they did, Eddie thinks. Judging by Lucy’s reaction to her arriving, it’s not too far-fetched. 

As they step inside, she catches his eyes, doesn’t say a word, just looks at him. And then, almost unnoticeable, she nods her head in a motion to signal him to come along. 

Who the fuck is Eddie Munson to say no to that? She’s radiant. She’s magnetic. So he grabs Dustin’s wrist and pulls him along, into the building and down the long winding hallways. Dustin is in awe, looking around himself as if he can’t believe what the fuck is happening right now. There’s nothing spectacular, not yet. Just a bunch of more or less drunk people, some wearing chunky headphones, some carrying cables, one tuning a guitar. This is it, Eddie thinks, it’s not the band itself that makes a show. It’s the atmosphere, the passion that everyone puts into every moment of this night. 

They walk further down the halls, gray walls on gray walls, men pushing road cases, pushing crates of beer. He could get used to this, he decides.

The hallway opens up in front of them, to a wide open area. There’s a bustling of people. Some are sitting on couches on one side of the room, some leaning against a table filled with food and drinks. All these voices are mashing together creating a song of their own.

But it all stops. The chaos and commotion, it stops as the girl in the fur coat steps into the room and everyone’s eyes fall on her. Time stops for a moment, it lingers on her and only her. On the smile that spreads on her lips and the way she throws her arms open in theatrics. 

When the moment passes, the room erupts into cheers and laughter and applause. There’s hollers and hoots coming from every corner, and they’re all for her. It’s as if all these people have waited their entire lives for this girl to arrive. There’s the band sitting right there and yet they all seem to be infatuated with her instead. She’s the main attraction and by the smirk on her face, she knows this very well.

“ Who is she? “ Dustin murmurs beside him, eyes fixed on the girl as well.

“ I have no fucking clue.” He will find out though, he knows that much. He has to. It isn’t a want. It was a need. 

The girl makes her round to exchange hugs and kisses with the people, they all look at her with a kindness in their eyes, wonder, admiration. All of them. Even the band members. 

She doesn’t even ask for a drink and yet there’s a beer in her hands immediately. If he didn’t know any better, which he does, Eddie would say that this girl has everyone under a spell. She is the center of attention, part of every conversation. She’s simultaneously a whisper and a yell. 

“ Come on you guys, let me introduce you to the band, “ Lucy approaches and throws her arm around Dustin’s shoulders before steering him towards the couches where a bunch of long-haired guys are lounging, beers and cigarettes in hand. Eddie is sure the young boy is having a mild heart attack at that moment. Having a beautiful girl introduce you to a band you love? That can do a number on any guy. 

“ The one over there is Pete, he’s our bassist. He’s a dumbass but we all love him. “ 

Pete looks up from his beer, tattooed arms flexing as he places the can on the table in front of him. “ Shut up, Lucy.” He doesn’t say it with malice though, there’s a smile on his face that makes him look way softer than one would assume with his tall build and his broad shoulders. He looks intimidating, Eddie can admit that much. Looks like a guy that would call him a freak, maybe even spit at him or give him a black eye. The smile he puts on for Lucy, clearly shows a different side though. And anyway, who is he for judging a book by its cover?

“ Those two are Sam and Chris. Do not mention art or human rights to them because they will pull you into a multiple hour conversation about those topics that you can not escape from. Love that about them. “ 

Sam, the girl, has hair just as red as that of Eddie’s neighbor and Dustin’s friend Max. She’s tall and slender and her skin is so pale it’s almost paperwhite. She reminds Eddie of the illustrations in one of the fairytale books his mom always used to read him as a kid. He remembers pictures of pixies or fairies or something, and they looked exactly like Sam. 

The guy that Lucy called Chris, is halfway laying on top of Sam, his head resting on her legs, his legs dangling over the end of the couch. His dark hair falls messily over his face, as he throws Eddie and Dustin a friendly wave. “ Don’t listen to her, it’s all lies and slander.” 

Eddie gives him a nod in understanding. Part of him yearns for this, the kind of friendship these people clearly seem to have. One that comes with friendly banter and insults never meant to harm, always just to bring a smile. It’s been a long time since he’s had a proper friend that he could trust. Sure he has the band and, as much as he hates to admit it, he has Steve and Robin and the kids now. But years of abandonment have left him wondering if all those friendships, all those connections are just circumstantial. Would they still be his friends if it weren’t for working together or the shared trauma they all experienced?

“ You not gonna introduce me to your new friends or what ? I am hurt. “ A guy slides up beside Lucy and ruffles her dark curls, making her scrunch her nose in annoyance. 

Looking at this guy feels a little strange to Eddie. He’s undeniably charming, he can tell that much already. He’s got that smirk perfected. This guy exudes confidence, mischief, some kind of unwillingness to conform to anyone’s ideals. The same way Eddie tries to. Only this guy still has the looks to go with it. The shiny golden hair, just messy enough to look effortless. The bright blue eyes. The smirk. A well planned, neatly curated image of organized chaos.

When he was a kid, Wayne used to take Eddie to the Hawkins fair every summer.  He wasn’t tall enough to go on most of the rides yet but they often went into the curiosity cabinet. There was one wall covered in these strange mirrors, the ones that are weirdly shaped. They make you look taller or shorter or twist your body in crazy shapes. You know it’s you in there, you but different. That’s what it feels like looking at that guy. He looks nothing like Eddie but there’s something so oddly familiar about him and the energy he exudes. Maybe this is the kind of guy Eddie could’ve been if life hadn’t dealt him such shitty cards.

“ Ah man, and here I thought I could get through the introductions without mentioning you. “ 

“ Can’t get rid of me baby. Never. “ 

“ Yeah that’s what I’m afraid of. “ 

After placing a kiss on Lucy’s cheek the guy turns towards Eddie and Dustin.

“ Name’s Lucky, I play guitar. ‘s nice to meet you.” he says and shakes Eddie’s hand 

“ Yeah, you too. I’m Eddie, this is Dustin. “ 

Lucky’s glance shifts towards the younger boy, a goofy smile playing on his lips.

“ Good to meet you, Dustin. You want a drink? We got beer over here but we got Whiskey in the back if you prefer that.“ 

“ He’s 15, dude. Back off.” 

“ Was trying to be friendly, no worries. “

But Eddie does worry. Always. Even if he doesn’t show it. He’s a worrier deep down. He’s well aware that his worry is at best misplaced and at worst extremely hypocritical. Was he drinking at 15? Absolutely. He was doing much worse. But isn’t that his job as an honorary older brother? To make sure Dustin makes better choices. To be the voice of reason he never had.

And anyway, if someone offers Dustin his first proper drink, it’ll be him. Maybe Harrington if he asks nicely. 

“ Lucky’s an idiot but sadly he’s also my best friend so —”  Lucy trails off and shrugs her shoulders for a lack of anything else to say.

“ Hey, where’s your brother. Still need to introduce him. “ 

The mischievous tint in Lucky's eyes vanishes as the words leave Lucy’s lips. “ Oh Jack, he uh — “ he starts then nods towards the corner of the room “ he’s phoning home. “ 

“ Oh.” 

“ Yeah.” 

There’s a shift in the air, like all the fun and excitement has suddenly been sucked away. It’s a heavy kind of silence that settles upon them. Something unspoken is happening, something heavy. Something neither Dustin nor Eddie are in on.

He lets his eyes wander towards the corner of the room where the man in question leans against the wall next to a payphone. The receiver of the phone is clutched in his hand so tightly, it looks painful. Eddie is sure that guy’s knuckles must be turning white as hard as he holds onto that receiver. As if it’s his fucking lifeline or something. 

Jack looks like a rockstar.  He’s got messy blond hair that goes down to his chin and looks like it hasn’t been properly combed in a while. He looks messy in general, but not dirty. More like he’s lived a lot of life in a short amount of time. There’s a certain edge to him, he looks tired, pissed off, exhausted. He looks sad. 

Though he seems to be involved in a heated phone conversation, Eddie can’t help but notice that Jack’s eyes are focused somewhere else entirely. They’re stuck on her. On the girl in the fur coat. The coat she is still wearing even though it’s hot inside. Everyone’s kinda sweaty and just the thought of wearing anything more than his flimsy old flannel makes Eddie start to perspire.

Jack’s eyes are literally glued to her every move and Eddie can’t fault him for that, she’s — enchanting.

“ Okay, whatever. Come on you guys, let me get you some drinks.” Lucy shakes him from his thoughts and pulls both Eddie and Dustin towards the table where a bunch of bottles are set up.

“ Again, he’s 15, he can’t have beer.“ Eddie remarks as Lucy holds out ice cold cans of beer to both him and the younger boy. Dustin only gives him an annoyed scowl. Honestly, he can’t blame him but the idea of bringing home an intoxicated Dustin from a concert he wasn’t even supposed to be at and facing the consequences of that choice, makes him overthink everything. He really can’t be arsed to get another lecture from Harrington.

“ Ah c’mon, He’s not a baby anymore. Let him life a little, it’s just one beer. It’s basically water. And I promise I’ll make sure no one else gives him another drink. Cross my heart.“ 

Eddie glances at the cans in Lucy’s hand then at Dustin who’s looking at him, lips pulled into a slight pout. No way in hell is he ever gonna admit this to anyone, but Dustin has him wrapped around his little finger. He sees so much of himself in the young boy. He remembers what it was like being the weird kid. The one that’s too loud, too passionate about stuff, too excitable, too — much. 

Eddie had to do it all alone. Push through the limbo of teenage angst while trying to figure out who he is and making a place for himself in this world.

He’s still not entirely sure but maybe this is a good start. Maybe he’s meant to be that person for Dustin. The one never had growing up. 

“ Alright okay, one beer! That’s it, one beer. Alright ?” 

The bright smile pulling at the corner of his lips tells him he made the right call here, it’s just one fucking beer, what harm can it possibly do?

“ Okay cool. Oh, I’m about to do Sam’s and Chris's hair, do you wanna come, hang out with us? I promise we’re so much cooler than the rest of the guys,” an excited Lucy blabbers a mile a minute while softly touching the curls on Dustin’s head. “ I love what you did to your hair, dude.” 

Dustin takes a sip from the can and scrunches his face up in disgust, though he’s quick to put up a front as she glances towards Eddie, his eyes almost asking for permission. Eddie only shrugs his shoulders in reply. This is a rock show, he’s done enough chaperoning already. He should be allowed to enjoy himself a little bit without him looking over his shoulders and watching her every move. And what kind of friend would Eddie be if he stopped Dustin from hanging out with two gorgeous older girls who are also rockstars. 

It’s not like there is any ulterior motive to it. It’s all fun and innocent and Lucy seems nice enough not to have Eddie worry too much about letting Dustin hang out with her.

Now by himself, Eddie leans against the beverage table and lets his mind wander. He remembers the first time he went to a show with an incredible fondness. He had just turned 13 and his dad was out of jail for a moment. And Frank Munson decided it was time to show the younger boy some good ass music. His words, not Eddie’s. So he took his son to a rock show at some sleazy dive bar in Lafayette. The band was absolute shit but that wasn’t all it was about. It was the liberation that came with it. It was that one fleeting moment that he and his estranged dad could connect without saying a word to each other. He felt alive that night in the company of so many who found themselves in the music. 

“ He your kid or your brother? “ a gruff voice speaks up. It’s rough and dark and smokey, like sandpaper and gravel. 

Jack, the singer, leans against the table next to Eddie. He takes one last drag from a cigarette, throws the butt into an empty beer can and then immediately lights the next one. 

“ He’s uh — he’s a friend but I think I might have adopted him unofficially. “ 

“ Ah —  yeah, thought you looked a bit young to be a dad. “ 

“ Thanks, I guess.”

“ How old are you anyway, like 21 or something ? “

“ Sure. “ 

If this guy believes he’s 21 then Eddie sure as hell is not gonna tell him otherwise. And really he’s not that far off. 

“ Heard Lucy snuck you in, huh ? “ 

Jack doesn’t look at Eddie, his voice gives nothing away. No judgment, no anger no nothing. 

“ I uh — yeah. That a problem ?“ 

“ Hey man, “ Jack says and gives Eddie a slap on the back “ I don’t give a shit, honestly. It’s not like we get a lot of cash from playing this dump. The owner is a shithead. “ 

“ So I’ve heard. He sounds like a real asshole. “ 

“ Ain’t that the truth. Look, I don’t mind you guys sneaking in. You guys care about my band, you wanna hear us play. That’s enough for me, to be honest. You’re here for the music and that’s all I can ask for. “ 

“ Dustin got me into your music, left one of his tapes in my van. One of your songs was on it. The one about the storm. “ 

“ Thunder on my mind. “ 

“ Yeah that one. It’s good. “ 

“ Thanks. “

“ Don’t let Dustin know she got me into your music though, I got a reputation to uphold. He thinks I’m the music guy in our friend group.“ 

“ Oh sure, my lips are sealed. “ Jack nods and holds out his beer for Eddie to clink their cans together in some sort of mutual understanding. 

The sound of laughter coming from the other side of the room makes them both turn their heads. She’s over in the corner, with her fur coat still on, sunglasses now perched on the top of her head. The tall guy, Pete?, he’s with her animatedly talking about one thing or another. She’s smiling, laughing. She’s — god, she’s hot. 

“ Who’s that ? “ he inquires nodding his head towards the girl.

Jack scoffs, takes a drink from his beer and for a moment he’s quiet. Like he’s contemplating some deep answer to one of humanity's most complicated questions. His eyes are glued to her again, like they’ve been most of the night. Eddie wonders if there’s history there. If maybe he should forget about every single thought he’s wasted on this girl. Maybe this is playing with fire. Is it really worth getting burned ?

“ That’s Miss Peony June. “ 

“ Fuck off, that’s not her name.” Eddie scoffs. Now, to be honest, he was expecting this girl to have a unique name. Having an ordinary name would not fit her at all. But Peony ? No one’s called Peony. 

“ Oh it’s her name alright. Is it the one her parents gave her ? Doubt it, but it’s the one she chose. It’s her name now. “ 

 “ So what’s her deal ? “ 

“ Let me give you some advice, kid. When it comes to Peony, don’t even bother asking any questions. You won’t end up getting any answers anyway. “ Jack replies then sighs “ trust me on that one.” 

He wants to ask questions though. So many of them. The answers though, Eddie wants to get them from her, not Jack, not Lucy. Those answers should come from her because he doubts anyone else can answer them truthfully.

“ Is she a groupie or something like that ? “ 

“ Oh boy, she’s not a groupie, don’t let her hear you say that. She’s — man Peony is …. “ Jack trails off, eyes still focusing intensely on her as if she’s the only person in this room. As if the surroundings, the people, the noise, all of it melts away. There’s just her. 

In that moment, Eddie is sure there’s history there. 

“ Ayo, Jack. Come help us set up. “ the blonde guy, Lucky, calls out while pushing a shiny black road case towards the stage. 

“ Hey man, we’re one man short, our roadie Danny is uh — he got caught doing shit the government doesn’t want us to do so he’s a bit preoccupied right now. You mind lending us a hand getting set up ? “ 

Eddie never considered himself particularly good at anything. Quite the contrary actually, everything he touches he seems to fuck up royally. Working at a fucking pizza parlour after just about making it through high school on his 3rd try, that’s only a clear proof of his inability to — well to amount to anything really. 

But the one thing he knows he’s good at, is music and anything to do with it. His heart is an amp, his blood is made of chaotic guitar riffs. He loves being surrounded by musicians, by equipment, by instruments. 

Pushing around road cases and helping the band set up for their show tonight, he’s fairly sure he can manage that at least.

“ Sure, just tell me what to do. I have a band of my own so I think I got this.“ 

And suddenly, without even noticing it, Eddie is slowly becoming part of something special. 

Even if it’s just a one time thing

Even if it’s just for tonight.

A sizzling fills the air as the band gets ready to go on stage. They huddle up together, yell and chant words of encouragement. They’re all included in the huddle, the band, Lucy, their Manager who Eddie has found out is named Reid, even Peony June. Everyone except some girls that are apparently not part of this friend group, and him and Dustin. Though Dustin is so fascinated and enchanted by all of it he doesn’t even have it in her to feel left out. 

Eddie does though. It’s not that he wants them to include him in this per se, he just wishes he had something like this in his life. A place where he feels like he belongs. People to trust. A place, a family. Something bigger than himself. Something true.

“ So are we going into the crowd ? “ Dustin asks no one in particular.

“ No kid, not tonight. Tonight we’re staying side-stage. “ Peony answers  as she breaks away from the circle and grabs Dustin’s hand to pull him to the side of the stage where they can look out into the crowd but be shielded from the eyes looking back at them. Lucy taps Eddie’s arm then beckons him to follow. And he does. 

The crowd gets louder and louder with every second ticking away. It’s not a huge crowd but it’s a dedicated one. Maybe you don’t need to play a show for 80 000 people for it to be memorable, maybe all that matter is that the people who are there give a fuck. 

Sam goes on stage first to sit behind her shiny red drum set, then Pete, Chris, Lucky. And then a hush falls over the crowd, like they’re all holding their breath in anticipation. Jack takes a big breath then opens his eyes and steps into the light. And the crowd is his from that moment on. 

Eddie turns to look at Dustin and when he catches sight of the smile on his face he knows he made the right decision coming here tonight. There’s the magic of a good concert written all over his face. Everyone is feeling it, Dustin, the band, the crowd — most of all Eddie. 

Next to him, Peony twirls and jumps and dances, her lips moving along with every word, her hips shaking in rhythm with every note. This is where she belongs, Eddie thinks. He’s not had a single proper conversation with her but of that, he is sure. This is her stage even if she doesn’t know it.

“ You guys always watch them play from side stage ? “ Eddie asks and leans closer to Lucy to make himself heard over the loud music.

 “ No, “ she says and glances towards Peony “ only on good days. Only when her and Jack are — well things are complicated. When she’s mad at him we go into the crowd. Think she likes watching him search the crowd for her. “ 

It sends a tiny pang straight to his heart, which he knows is fucking silly. He doesn’t know this girl at all and it was pretty obvious there’s something going on between her and Jack, whatever that may be. It’s dumb to feel some kind of borderline jealousy about it. And yet … 

“ Are they a thing ? “ 

Lucy sighs and contemplates for a moment before answering.

“ Look, it’s not my place to air their dirty laundry or anything. And anyway, I don’t even know much. Things are complicated. They’re both — they’re both broken people. Think that’s why they gravitate towards each other so much. “ 

Eddie wants to know more. He wants to know so much more but Lucy pats his back and tells him she’s gonna go get another drink. He can’t very well follow her; that would just be a bit intrusive, slightly creepy. So he doesn’t. He lets himself get sucked back into the magic of Rock n’ Roll. Of good songs. Loud crowds. The unity that comes with sharing the same love for the music. 

And he watches her, Peony, twirling and dancing and smiling as if no pain has ever reached her heart, ever. 

Everyone is sweaty after the show. Sweaty, exhausted and absolutely high on adrenaline. Dustin is tired and Eddie knows he should be well on his way home right now but he just doesn’t wanna let go yet. So when the band asks him if he’d be able to help them pack up, he agrees. Maybe he can hold onto this night for just a little longer.

“ So, Eddie. Since our roadie Danny can’t come on tour, you fancy joining us ? We could use some help, ‘specially since it’s our first proper tour and you’ve got experiebnce. “ The big guy, Pete, asks as they load a road case into a van.

He is dumbfounded. This is not something he’s expected. He says it so nonchalantly as if it’s not a life changing choice. Probably because to Pete, it isn’t. To Eddie though, that would change everything. At least for the time being. Once the tour is over life would shift back into normality. But for a few months he could be — well more than he is now.

But can he really let himself get lost in this fantasy of a life on the road with a legit rock band ? 

“ I don’t know, man. I appreciate the offer but …” 

“ No worries. I totally get it. You got a life to live, people waiting. It’s all good. “ 

And what a life that is. Delivering pizza to people who don’t tip. Coming home to a trailer that’s empty because his uncle loves him so much he works himself to death so he can give Eddie a good life.

One day, when Wayne is gone and Dustin is old enough to leave Hawkins, he’ll be all alone. And that’s not something he wants to think about. 

“ Yeah. yeah. Right. “ 

Looking for Dustin, Eddie spots him sitting on the sofa next to Peony, who’s still wearing her red coat like a badge of honor. Like her very own personal uniform. A smirk finds its way onto Eddie’s lips. Leave it to the kid to charm all the ladies in here.

“ Oh fuck those people. You know what, Dustin? That’s good! You need to have dreams. Passion and drive and ambition. “ 

He can hear the passion in  Peony’s words as she monologues to the kid. He doesn’t wanna interrupt or intrude on their conversation but he feels this invisible pull and it’s too hard to fight back against it. So he walks closer and closer before slumping down on the opposite couch.

“ You need goals and something that keeps you going. Dreams are — they are so important. Please never let go of them. Never stop chasing them. “ 

Dustin is glued to her every word as if this girl is opening doors and kicking down fences he didn’t even know existed. 

“ What are your dreams ? “ he asks and Peony just regards him with a soft smile. One that seems completely genuine but one that holds an edge of weariness, of pain that a smile so young shouldn’t know. 

“ I just want to be seen. “ 

When Peony says those words, she pulls her eyes away from the girl and lets them connect with Eddie’s for a split second before her gaze falls on something behind him. Someone behind him. 

Eddie doesn't have to turn around to figure out what she’s regarding so intensely. It’s written on her face, her eyes, her lips, the little scrunch of her nose. The longing. 

He hopes Jack knows that she looks at him this way. He hopes he reciprocates that same look. Because she deserves to be seen. 

“ That why you’re wearing the coat ? “ his mouth is faster than his brain and the words leave his lips without his conscience really signing off on that decision. 

“ No, “ she smirks, “ that’s because I look good in it.” 

For some reason Eddie doubts that there’s anything she doesn’t look good in.

“ What’s your name again? “ 

“ Eddie. “ 

“ I’m Peony. Peony June. “ 

Eddie smirks at her “ that’s not your real name. “

“ Yes it is. “ 

“ Your parents named you Peony ? “ 

“ No. I did. I find it insanely presumptuous of my parents to assume they can choose what kind of person I am going to be by forcing a name on me at birth. I should get to decide my own life, my own fate. My dreams, ambitions, passions. So my first step into complete liberation was choosing my own name. I am Peony June, that is who I am and who I want to be. Is that alright with you ? “ 

Though there’s an edge to her words, she smiles a genuine smile. He wants to see her smile more often. 

“ Fair enough. “ 

“ Good. “ 

“ Henderson, “ Eddie addresses the boy “ we should go. It’s getting late. “ 

They get up, Dustin makes the rounds saying goodbye to the people he’s spent one magical night around, as Eddie looks back at the wonderful mess that is Miss Peony June.

“ You’re not coming on tour with us ?” she asks.

“ Huh ? “ 

“ Pete and Jack said they were gonna ask you to come along as a roadie. Reid, their manager, said it’s fine with him. “ 

“ Oh they asked but — life. You know ? “ 

She smiles again and shakes her head slightly, almost unnoticeable.

“ I don’t, actually. But I wish you all the best. “ 

“ Yeah, thanks. You too. “ 

He really wishes her the best, but something tells him that the world has not much kindness to give to someone like her. Who deserves so much. It’s always the people who deserve a lot that end up with very little in the end. 

The trailer is quiet as Eddie arrives back home. Wayne’s fold-out bed is stored in the corner of the living space. Sad and old and not meant for a man to sleep on who already has a bad back. 

Sometimes Eddie wonders how Wayne manages to not resent him, at least a little bit. He could’ve had a life. A family. Hell, he could’ve had a room with a proper bed, if it wasn’t for Eddie. If it wasn’t for his mom dying and his dad taking off. Wayne could’ve had a life if it wasn’t for other people’s burdens.

He’s about to settle into his room, when his eyes fall back onto the floor and that stain that they’ve been unable to fully get out of the carpet no matter how much they scrubbed.

The blood. Chrissy’s blood. 

He’s doing a good job, pushing all that stuff to the back of his mind but sometimes, when it’s really quiet and he’s alone and closes his eyes, he sees her face. Pain-stricken, scared, dead. It’s a sight he will never be able to forget.

That was the moment his life changed forever. Sure he has been acquitted and people know it wasn’t him. Doesn’t mean they all necessarily believe it. The truth doesn’t mean much in a town like Hawkins. He’s the kid who was accused of murder and he always will be.

Sometimes he wishes he could just leave, just for a moment. Go somewhere people don’t know him. Not him, not Wayne, not Chrissy. No one.

Not forever just for a moment. To finally breathe. Because it feels like he hasn’t done that since the moment the Cheerleader stepped foot into his trailer.

That’s enough. It’s been enough for a long time but today the string finally rips in two. He can’t stay here any longer. He needs to get out. He needs to get out. He —

Sometimes, and those times are really rare, life gives you a chance. A way out. And it’s on you to reach out and grab it. 

This is Eddie’s time to reach out. And reach out he does.

And grab it.

And hold on so tightly as if his life depends on it.

The van is still parked at the back entrance of the Loud Room, a group of people mingling around it, the ambers at the ends of their cigarettes the only things illuminating the night.

Eddie’s boots create a crunching sound as he steps across the gravel and towards the group. 

He hopes this isn’t a colossal mistake but as Peony has said, sometimes it’s on you to decide where your life is supposed to go and what kind of person you want to be.

All Eddie knows is that he doesn’t want to be the person he is right now anymore. 

 “ Hey. “ he says and lifts his hand in greeting as he steps closer towards the crowd. 

“ Eddie. “ Jack says and takes a drag from his cigarette “ forget something ? “ 

“ I uh — no. I was wondering if the offer still stands ?” 

Jack hesitates for a moment, takes a slow drag from the cigarette then focuses an intense stare on the boy. That’s until he cracks and his lips are pulled into a wide smile. “ Absolutely. Get your stuff on the bus, boy. America is waiting for you. “ 

Eddie looks at them all, takes in their welcoming smiles, their nods of encouragement. All he wants to see though, is her. 

And when he does, his heart does a little flutter. Maybe playing with fire will be worth it after all.