I don't matter.

- - -

[izlefty]

Hi, Tumblr. Thanks for listening.

Sorry for lashing out earlier. I just... couldn't take it anymore. I want to kill myself. But I think it's not the best time for now.

I don't know how much I cried and drank, but there are hints of it on my pillow. It was soaking wet. I still feel like trash, like, I'm not worth anything anymore. I used my RP characters to release some anger, sadness. But it wasn't enough. I wanted more. Help me. What can I do? What do I do?

[izlefty]

Hi, world. I am depressed. I want to kill myself.

Hey, world. I just wanted to tell you something I should've said when I was younger. I want to kill myself.

Through out these years you've been unfair to me. For years, I've cried myself to sleep, tried different mediums, talked to people, to experts. None of these ever helped me. You are really a shady son of a bitch. Are you toying with me? Should I kill myself and not you? I could go do that right now. It's won't be hard.

People will disregard me; they'll forget me. I won't matter. I'm just 1 out of 7 billion. I am expandible, throwable, replacable. My bullies were right, I was a mistake. My mind was right, I am nothing. My insticts were right, I don't belong to this world. Thank you for taking your time to read this. Now throw this away or maybe delete it. I don't care.

Goodbye.

- Lefty

[izlefty]

So my friend made this for me (She insisted She'd make a pixel art of me as a late birthday gift, she's awesome follow her on twitter it's @b3eans) She asked about why I wanted flux (The purple things) on me, so I said I'll tell later. So I thought of telling her here because I feel unsafe at our chat (even if it's just the 10 of us there, compared to here) So the reason behind it is because I have depression, and it's been about 2 years since I have it. It's on my eye because I am at the point where I cry in my sleep and such. It's spreading everywhere like... Well... Right now I am looking for ways to cure my "flux" and I need it fast.

[izlefty]

Personal Rant

So... My birthday was yesterday (April 18, I live in the Phils) and Most of my “friends” didn’t greet me, I was tired of forcing people saying “Happy Birthday  to me.” Just to force them to say happy birthday to me, I was so surprised that I thought they were my friends... I hated it... That’s all... I also feel proud of my friends, even tho they forgot that it’s my birthday, they promised to give me gifts and random crap...

[izlefty]

Fighting Depression is like making a cake.

You just need to find the Right ingredients, Right procedure and a lot of time. Ingredients: Eggs - Those people who are willing to spend their time with you, no matter what the problem is, even if they “Crack” they’ll still be a good ingredient to mix in. Sugar - The people who are sweet to you, Jokes aside, they are the kind ones. Always there to support you. Flour - The ones who make you and the ones who are helping you stable. hey mold you to turn into the best possible person. Butter - They’re the ones who doesn’t make you stick on the “Hot Plate.” Milk - The Pure ones are always the best, they make your problems lighter. Vanilla, Chocolates, and any other flavorings - They’re the ones who add Flavor and color to your life, they spice it up and let you see the world can accept you, depending on the people who like you. Icing and decor - They’re the ones who add beauty about your life and make you see the open world, they’re tho ones who make you realize that you are beautiful, even though they’re just for the outside, they still make you realize that if you can be beautiful outside, you can be inside too. After doing the simple procedures, a cake is made. YOU are the CAKE that was made by those ingredients, sure, you may come out as what you expected, you still made one, even if those problems eat you and you go back to square one, you still have those ingredients, no matter how hard your problems are, they are still there to make you and mold you into that beautiful cake you’re always dreaming. Do not give up! There is still much more things to do! The world is young!

[bambwie]

Send me numbers..

Wait, these are actually hella cute questions.”

— 1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

4. Are you easy to get along with?

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

15. What good thing happened this summer?

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

19. Do you like bubble baths?

20. Do you like your neighbors?

21. What are you bad habits?

22. Where would you like to travel?

23. Do you have trust issues?

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

26. What do you do when you wake up?

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

30. Do you ever want to get married?

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

33. Spell your name with your chin.

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

40. What do you want to do after high school?

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

43. Do you smile at strangers?

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

46. What are you paranoid about?

47. Have you ever been high?

48. Have you ever been drunk?

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

53. Favourite makeup brand?

54. Favourite store?

55. Favourite blog?

56. Favourite colour?

57. Favourite food?

58. Last thing you ate?

59. First thing you ate this morning?

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

62. Been arrested? For what?

63. Ever been in love?

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

65. Are you hungry right now?

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

67. Facebook or Twitter?

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

69. Are you watching tv right now?

70. Names of your bestfriends?

71. Craving something? What?

72. What colour are your towels?

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

75. Favourite animal?

76. What colour is your underwear?

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

80. What colour pants?

81. Favourite tv show?

82. Favourite movie?

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

87. First person you talked to today?

88. Last person you talked to today?

89. Name a person you hate?

90. Name a person you love?

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

92. In a fight with someone?

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

95. Last movie you watched?

96. Favourite actress?

97. Favourite actor?

98. Do you tan a lot?

99. Have any pets?

100. How are you feeling?

101. Do you type fast?

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

103. Can you spell well?

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

108. What should you be doing?

109. Is something irritating you right now?

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

111. Do you have trust issues?

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

113. What was your childhood nickname?

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

115. Do you play the Wii?

116. Are you listening to music right now?

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

118. Do you like Chinese food?

119. Favourite book?

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

121. Are you mean?

122. Is cheating ever okay?

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

125. Do you believe in true love?

126. Are you currently bored?

127. What makes you happy?

128. Would you change your name?

129. What your zodiac sign?

130. Do you like subway?

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

134. Can you count to one million?

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

137. How tall are you?

138. Curly or Straight hair?

139. Brunette or Blonde?

140. Summer or Winter?

141. Night or Day?

142. Favourite month?

143. Are you a vegetarian?

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

145. Tea or Coffee?

146. Was today a good day?

147. Mars or Snickers?

148. What’s your favourite quote?

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

[justsara007]

Please do this, need something to keep me busy.

[morganbronner2-deactivated20151]

PLEASE

[pon3boi-mod]

Ask me these things for tmi Tuesday :)

[alasoumod]

/o/

[rarityismywaifu]

Sounds like fun, leave me some numbers!

[just-shower-thoughts]

The song “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus” has a very different meaning for children who still believe in Santa

[izlefty]

Or adults...

[markiplier]

Ok I’m getting out of bed now. All sass was a personal gift from between my sheets.

[izlefty]

My God, Mark...

[izlefty]

'Ey @markiplier, do you want to make a public conversation?

[izlefty]

Happy Birthday Kim!

Have a Happy Birthday! You deserve it! ;)

[tinycartridge]

Bayonetta joins the Smash Bros. roster too! ⊟ 

It’s witch time! Apparently she was the victor of the Smash Ballot we’ve all been waiting on the results for? She received the most votes in Europe and was one of the most popular characters in the U.S. too. I guess this means no Goku?

BUY Bayonetta 2

[dou-hong]

Kirby with that Bayonetta weave tho

[izlefty]

MOTHER WILL BE JOINING SUPER SMASH BROS! FUCK YES! THIS IS FINALLY THE TIME!

I still want to play as Phoenix Wright tho... ._.

[pedrropascal]

[insert relatable caption here]

[izlefty]

When you masturbate too furiously... (Sorry, Mark)

[izlefty]

Everytime

My Friend: Look at this guy, he's hawt

Me: He's probably not ho- *Looks at a hottie, drooling*

Me: Dayum.

[izlefty]

Time to open up and show everyone what I always think. I have a war in my head and I cannot solve it, I need someone to listen, it's the only thing I need, someone to share everything to, my happiness, sadness, anger. In short, I feel isolated even though my friends and family are there. I have problems everywhere, my friends, teachers, myself, family. The reason I always feel isolated and lonely is neither of my friends or my family is in no state to open up to and I always think they will not care nor they will help me. My family doesn't know a lot about me. My friends are being douches and to be honest, I am the nice one on our group. I have a complete list of things that my Family and Most of my friends do not know.

[rondus18]

I made a friend in Splatoon today.

[awawawawawawawawawafuck]

owo

[izlefty]

This is the cutest game of Leap Squid ever...

[dei-days-deactivated20170822]

Sam...? (have you met a guy named Sam? Pretty sure you did... So the First Sam you've met.)

Oh, SAM. there was this guy back in highschool, we call him Sam or Samu… and all I could remember about him is that he two timed my friend hs friend. But get this, I met him again in college, and he ended up dating another friend and also two timed her. He’s an ASS.

[izlefty]

You forgot "Hole"... Right?

[girlforce-deactivated20160106]

send me names anonymously and I’ll share my personal experience with the person with that name