In My Head

|| Jae || 21 || Visual Artist || "I can't figure you out with the things I see."

[fuckyeahjapanandkorea]

[jaebn]

[ ↺ ]

jae shrugs, “who knows, maybe i’ll take off for the rest of the week. depending on my sleep schedule.” it’s not like he was obsessed with working because that wasn’t the case at all, he just needed the money so he usually picked up a few extra hours. “you should take off too. i see you here most of the time, you deserve a break like me.” the male suggested with a friendly grin. in his case, everyone worked hard at the cafe and that always made him proud to be apart of the family.

“lonely? eh, sometimes i needed the space when it came to those two. three teenagers walking around that house was hell at one point.” privacy just wasn’t a thing in their household. yes, it was nice having them around to depend on but things can get a little too much for him. jae always knew what it felt like to be alone, since he was in a foster home for awhile. “well - i was sort of like you until my parents adopted me. i learned to be grateful at the age of three, it was pretty overwhelming.” he never once thought about his real parents, to be honest. it just wasn’t something he cared for because he was blessed with a good family.

jae’s shoulders relaxed and he sighed in satisfaction. he nodded his head once, turning around again and started washing his own cup.  “be honest, jae. no sugarcoating. no lying. how are you?” that made him stop moving his hands, thinking about his answer. he didn’t know at all - maybe it was something he hasn't thought of. “I’m not too sure, actually. stressed out about things, i guess.”

[jaebn]

{  bnbitna }:

ah, fuck. she fucked up on her eyeliner again. “god damn it,” bitna hisses underneath her breath, gritting her teeth and scrubbing furiously at the wobbly black wing. she sucks in a deep gulp of air, finds her zen, and, without even the slightest exhale, tries again. success, god bless. a bold magenta swipe on her lips –the final touch to complete her look– and she is finally ready. and she looks fucking fine, if she’s being completely honest with herself.

“baaaaaaby, how do i look?!” bitna screeches as she runs from the bathroom and into the living room of her ‘baby’’s place; most people would find her running around in a home that wasn’t hers rude, but she was over at su jae’s place so much it was practically her home, too– she even had her very own key, for god’s sake. striking an exaggerated model’s pose and puckering her lips together in a would-be alluring manner, she poses to her best friend and also biggest annoyance a very important question. “hoe-y or classy? be honest, man. i’m going for lee hyori’s look in ‘bad girls’ – did i succeed.” bitna waits impatiently for jae’s answer– his opinion kinda matters, but also not really, because she disagrees with him ninety-nine percent of the time anyway, because that’s just how being a best friend goes. “decide already, damn it, this pose is cramping me up and we’re gonna be late for my fave dj, you asshole!”

of course jae was the first one to be ready, it only took an hour to get ready. now all he had to do was sit here and wait, for his best friend. “i wish she would hurry up.” the male mumbled. his patience level was always low when it came to his best friend, bitna. sometimes he feels like she does this on purpose. maybe giving her his spare key was a mistake - all his food ended up being gone once he got home from work. Hell, he even found her asleep in his bed one time; he was so tempted to flip her off the bed that night.

“baaaaaaby, how do i look?!” jae looked up from his phone at those words. a laugh fell from his lips at her pose, she was an interesting girl for sure. “what the hell are you doing? i can’t take you seriously with that pose.” he said with a goofy smile, standing up to view her better. “you’re no where close to classy and I don’t think you look hoe-y either.” i think asking a guy for fashion advice was the biggest mistake she could make right now. jae couldn’t help but laugh again, “you definitly succeed but maybe, tone it down with the jewelry?” that answer could be taken very wrong if she thinks too much on it, something bitna did whenever she ask him something. their friendship worked differently than others - some might even from upon them because of how open they are in the morning.

[byulrooyah]

wait, what?

[jaebn]

[ ↺ ]

lying about something like this was super useless. she couldn’t think of any reasons why she’s sitting in front of her door with her groceries sitting next to her. “don’t worry about me, i can’t handle them. i just bought canned foods i can throw it at whoever attacks me.” she replied looking up at him, her hands signalling to not worry. she was shy enough to tell him why it’s taking her long to get inside, but she did told him in the end. “actually, yes i’m locked out…again.” the last word coming out as a whisper then looked down.

“i was actually sure i got my keys with me but i guess not.” sunhi shrugged, just accepting the situation she’s in. “so you’re locked out too? is this a coincidence or we’re both just unlucky tonight?” she asked him smiling, patting down the space next to her. “i would ask the landlord but i didn’t wanna bother. it’s pretty late.” her head resting at the door behind her, looking at jae’s way. her mind processing little questions to ask the younger one. “how did you end up being locked out? and once again, what are you doing out late?”

jae chuckled at her words,  “but once all your canned foods are gone, what will you do next?” he questioned her with a small smirk. it was still dangerous for a woman to be out in the halls like this so, the male decided to stay with her. he sat down in the spot she patted, sitting Indian style before leaning his head against the wall once more. “again? come on, sunhi.” he laughed. “i see you didn’t learn your lesson yet.” this was actually jae’s first time, maybe it was the lack of sleep finally getting to him.

the male shrugged, biting the inside of his cheek before speaking. “i think we’re both out of luck tonight. i’m definitely getting a spare key tomorrow morning.” he smiled. thankfully he didn’t have work tomorrow because obliviously, they’ll both be staying up tonight. “i was going to call my sister but i wouldn’t hear the end of things.” sighing deeply, closing his eyes to prevent himself from rolling them in annoyance towards his sibling. “i was rushing this morning to work and i guess my keys weren’t in the bag.” jae said. “it was my night shift too so, i had to stay after to lock up.”

[jaebn]

[ ↺ ]

jae has never seen someone so determined like minhyuk, he really did appreciate it though because it showed how much he cared. “ah, you don’t have to do that.” he laughed. procrastinating on that project wasn’t a good idea either, this could make or break his grade. “i’ll call the boss tomorrow after I wake up. i think 3 days is good enough, right?” the male questioned, tilting his head a little.

“drinking water also helps! i just let her do it since that’s our bonding time.” taking care of his skin was less of his worries, his sister sometimes got upset whenever he starts breaking out from allergies. jae then thought about the other male question, “it’s fun at times, i have an older brother and younger sister. i have a closer relationship with them both, i had their back all the time, too.” he smiled.  just thinking about them brings the memories they shared together. “it was pretty devastating when i had to move out, my sister missed me so much that she moved into the apartment complex across from mind.” jae chuckled, shaking his head as the scene played back in his mind.

“i’ll get my revenge on you one day, watch your back.” he grinned. sliding the coffee in front of minhyuk and stepping back to observe his facial expression. making coffee for others always brought joy to him, even though it made him nervous while watching them drink it. “trust me, i understand.”  jae sighed before nodding his head in agreement.

[jaebn]

[ ↺ ]

Jae was always able to handle different task at the same time. He actually found it pretty fun, never worrying about how it could effect him or the people around him. He couldn’t help but laugh at what the male said, “I’ll do it since I know your serious. Just remind me later on in the week.” the male said. Knowing Jae, he’d probably forget about the whole ‘take a break’ thing. He might do it last minute before it’s too late.

Of course he knew the other male was joking, he just liked teasing people whenever things got a little serious. He raised his hand behind his head, rubbing his neck while thinking of an answer. “My sister puts this weird cream on my face every week.” I guess that was their way of bonding. Besides, Jae had surprisingly good skin already. “I just let her do whatever since it makes her happy.” he shrugged with a smile.

While making the coffee, Jae let out a dramatic gasp. “How dare you, my heart is very fragile! I can’t believe you. After all we’ve been through.” he said, smiling from ear to ear. Joking around like this took away the feeling of being tired, it was a nice change. “I got you, nothing to strong  though. And no, insist.”

[silverjonghyun]

[hagias]

[jaebn]

@bnjihye​

Sitting at the park during his lunch break was normal for Jae, you could say that he was well known by the old people who walks around everyday as well. He had about 30 more minutes before he had to head back for work so, the male decided to fiddle around with his camera to pass the time. Yes he was very bored but it was too nice of a day to stay inside that stuffy building. Bringing his camera up to his face, he zoomed on nothing in particular until he witnessed a girl taking photos too.

 She was very pretty, no doubt about it. It was very odd for him to see certain people behind the camera instead of modeling. You could say that it throws him off a bit but hey, that was none of his business but; something about that girl being the photographer bothered him. Before he even realized it, he was walking towards her. Jae didn’t even know what to say and it’s too late to turn around because their eyes met.

“Uh..- hi, I’m Jae.” He gave her one of his nervous smiles, tugging at the hem of his shirt. “I was just wondering if you were a professional photographer?”

[jaebn]

[ ↺ ]

“I could say the same thing for you, you work harder than me.” Jae usually observed all of his co-workers. It was a habit of his that was hard to be broken, he just worried about everyone else. He smiled softly at his words, “I took tomorrow off actually, I’m too exhausted now a days.” Juggling work and school was a very hard task in his opinion. Getting sleep wasn’t really important to him on some days, especially since he has a big assignment due next month. “I’ll try to work in the afternoon’s next week due to school - might even take off for a few days.” Jae didn’t have a plan just yet but he’ll figure it out soon.

Jae chuckled, running a hand through his hair. “I feel terrible, it usually reflects my image.” Since he has a very weak immune system, it’s hard for him to even take care of his health like he wants. “Maybe I should start drinking tea, it might make my skin look flawless.” he joked, Jae couldn’t even make a decent cup of tea or cook a decent meal without burning something. 

The male couldn’t help the laugh that came out. He then put his hand over his heart to indicate how hurt he was by his words, faking it of course. “You just put a damper on my mood, I’m deeply hurt by your choice of words.” Jae nodded his head, pushing himself away from the counter before turning his back to Minhyuk. “It’s not a problem at all, what would you like? It’s on the house but don’t tell anyone.”

[jaebn]

[ ↺ ]

Jae shrugged his shoulder with a small grin. He’ll never admit that he’s actually easily frightened, though. As a younger child, Jae and his siblings always tried to make the other scared by telling ghost stories or anything they found on the internet. “I’m glad it’s just you, if it was anyone else..- I don’t know how I’d react to them.” Now, Jae’s not a violent person at all but when his personal space is invaded by a stranger; let’s just say he won’t be pleased. He did have a few fights in junior high just for situations like this, the male isn’t all that fond about it either.

“Anyone who eats my cooking is a complete fool.” he chuckled. “I’m not all that good so to be honest, I’m pretty excited to eat some delicious food.” Last time he was even in the kitchen was at his mom house, Jae burned the noodles and never tried to cook again. “You didn’t have to do all this for me, I appreciate it but, I could’ve brought something too. Like a bag of chips.” He smiled before bringing the camera up to his face.  “I prefer to take pictures of people though, I find them more beautiful. “

Jae sat down on the grass, twisting his wrist to zoom in on the sky. There was nothing exciting about nature for some reason, yeah the seasons were changing but it’s the same thing in his opinion. “I’ll let you have my Polaroid camera, it’s really easy to use. No skills needed.” That’s if he can find the camera in his apartment. “Are you sure you want your kitchen to burn down?”

[supemacky]

[jaebn]

[ ↺ ]

Returning from work at this time of night was nothing new in Jae’s opinion. It was just one of those nights where he decided to take a late night drive, just to clear is mind on any wandering thoughts. He didn’t think of anything else but his bed as he made his way to the door of his apartment. Although he was in a rush early this morning, the male could’ve sworn he grabbed everything he needed for the day. Clearly he was wrong once he searched his bag for the last time, completely emptying his bag onto the floor. “Wow.” that was all he could say in this situation. That was better than the whine that threatened to come out, out of all nights it had to be the day he was exhausted. 

Maybe he could call one of his friends, but he didn’t want to bother them this late at night. Jae checked in his bag one more time just in case he missed any spot or pockets. The male just couldn’t believe that he forgot his keys, the most important thing beside his wallet. Sleeping in the halls was a terrible idea and something he tried to avoid at all cost. He slid down on the floor, yawning before leaning his head against the wall.  “ah, jae-ah you just got home? it’s late, why are you still out?” Jae felt like he was going crazy for a few seconds, or maybe that was the lack of sleep.

He turned his head to the voice with his eyes half open, he smiled once he realized who it was and sat up a little. “I could be asking you the same thing. It’s dangerous out there at night.” yelling down the hall wasn’t one of his finest moments but at this point, he just didn’t care. By the looks of things, Sunhi seemed to be in the same situation as well. “Are you locked out as well?”  he asked.

[jaebn]

[ ↺ ]

Jae finally turned his body to face the other male, placing his coffee in front of him before leaning against the counter. “I can agree, but tonight is just one of those days where my lack of sleep is finally getting to me.” he simply stated with a shrug. He actually enjoyed staying after work just because of the late night conversations. Who would want to miss that when he desperately needed it? With a long sip of his coffee, Jae raised an eyebrow. “I’m off tomorrow so I can just sleep in. Besides, I need to talk to you about stuff that’s been bothering me a lot.”

Did he really look that bad? He couldn’t help but smile at his own thoughts. That’s the one thing that he hated about his features, he was an open book mainly to anyone who truly understood him. Jae usually got bags really easily so he could only imagine how he looked to others. “I’m sure with enough rest, I’ll be as good as new.” he gave him a small smile, reassuring the other that he’ll be ok. Staying up like this was really nothing and this isn’t the fist time he’s felt this tired, that’s where coffee played it’s role.

“Seriously, I’m ok! Stop worrying so much,” he chuckled. “You’re making me feel like I look terrible. On a lighter note though, would you like something to drink?” He asked while slightly tilting his head. Anything that could take Minhyuk mind off of his health - Jae would use any excuse in the book right now.

[jaebn]

[ ↺ ]

Although Jae enjoyed horror films and the thrill that came with it; he didn’t like the idea of people popping out like that. Especially if that person is close to him. His whole body tensed up and fear was very clear in his eyes, checking to see who it is before he started swinging on that person. “Ya!” he started with a small grin, indicating that he wasn’t upset. “You can’t just creep up on someone like that.” The male breathed out before looking at Hwan. How could someone stay mad at this guy? Besides, his reason for being late was very acceptable. Jae thought they could just go out to eat after this but of course, someone was one step ahead of him.

His new friendship with this male was only a few weeks ago, around the time Jae started working at c&c as well. He couldn’t remember his first interaction with Hwan but it must have been a good one since they’re sort of close already. “You know, I never had your cooking before. So you can say that I’m pretty curious on how it taste.” Jae was just the barista at the cafe so of course he couldn’t really have a lunch break there. He has heard rumors on how delicious the pastry dishes are very delicious - admitting that he was very excited to finally trying it was a big no-no. 

As much as he wanted to push this project back, he had to get started since it’s due soon. Jae sighed as he stood up, focusing his camera. “Ding, ding! You are correct.” chuckling at mainly himself. “We have to capture the beauty of nature.” He muttered before clicking the button. There was something about the sound it made that got the male a little excited, this feeling was nothing new though. His love for taking pictures in general was very strong.

“I would let you take a few photos after I’m finished but, I don’t think you’re ready.” He smirked, he was challenging the older male. That was his way of basically saying ‘I’ll let you play around with my camera.’ He enjoyed watching other people take an interest in the same thing as him, even though not many people took photography seriously. 

[jaebn]

{  bnminhyuk }:

between late night shifts during the weekend and thinking endlessly on about nothing at his apartment, minhyuk knows that it’s better for him if he just lets out his thoughts to people instead of the peach wall. and before he ends up speaking to a table at c&c, eyes furrowed and lips parting to begin a twenty minute long rant, he manages to catch himself. just barely. ( god forbid the embarrassment that would have taken hold of him if the customers thought their waiter was a lunatic.) eyes skimming over the clock, he exhales deeply and goes back to polishing the silverware.

until the clock hits five past ten pm. he hasn’t gotten enough sleep for the past two days, not to mention the fact that he’ll have to stay around for probably another hour and a half due to the closing time and cleaning up quite literally almost brings him to tears on the spot. aigoo, what a pity. he voices all of his thoughts inside so, offering bright smiles at the remaining two people in the cafe as though he is not about to drop dead on the spot.

and when he returns from the storage room at half past ten, his gaze is greeted with an empty cafe. save for the one person that’s currently in front of the coffee maker, his back to minhyuk. minhyuk allows a small grin. perhaps closing up wouldn’t be so boring after all.

“oh – jae? you’re still here?”

Business was always busy during the mid-afternoon. That usually kept Jae distracted from any disturbing thoughts that liked to keep him up from sleep. See, he easily thinks about the littlest things that aren’t even relevant to some people. It can mess up with his head at times but he can push them back during work, getting distracted there would be troublesome. But, keeping things to himself for a long period of time without going on a rambling fit can put a damper on his mood. That’s just how he was, although faking a smile was the easy way out in this situation.

It was close to the end of the day and Jae couldn’t even keep his eyes open for another minute. He stayed up late working on his project last night, it’s now coming down on him pretty hard. Sneaking his daily coffee was a breeze though since people thought it was for a customer but really, he’s trying his best to stay awake. Closing up the shop on his own was just cruel punishment in his opinion because out of all days - today was by far the worst. Jae turned his body away from eye sight to yawn into his arm a few times, sneaking a glance at the ticking clock that seemed to be going a little slow. 

By the time closing came around, the male brewed up some coffee so he could hurry and close. Going home and jumping straight to bed sounded like pure bliss in his minds.  “oh – jae? you’re still here?” Jae flinched a little, looking over his shoulder at the voice. He let his body relax and a long sigh came out before he smiled.

“ Minhyuk, you scared me half to death,” he stated with a chuckle before turning his attention back to making his coffee. “I though I’d be the only one here tonight. ”