hi hun ! i saw the ask where you said that mr.jeong would love his wife more than his daughter. would you ever write a small thing about that ?
[3:03pm]
genre: fluff
warnings: none
you were washing dishes while johnnys wife made some spicy kimchi soup for the adults— and some seaweed soup for the kids.
“alright,” johnny speaks making jaehyun hum.
“hannie! be careful, baby! don’t climb up the slide.” jaehyun scolds the little girl who plays with johnnys son and daughter. “okay, daddy! i’m sorry!” hannie apologizes to the soft hearted man.
“it’s okay, baby.” he turns back to johnny. “anyways, continue.” johnny pulls the bottle from his lips and smacks them together.
“if hannie and y/n were hanging off a cliff and you had a choice to pick between one of them to save— who?” without hesitation, jaehyun answers.
“y/n.”
johnnys eyes bulge at the answer. “really?” jaehyun nods, his foot shaking. “i actually though that you would pick hannie, but clearly i was.. wrong.”
“i mean—?” as jaehyun tries to explain, a voice interruptes him.
“jeong jaehyun, didn’t i tell you before to stop saying that!” johnny sputters into laughter and so does his wife.
her butt bumps into yours as her laughter calms. “you and him have talked about that before?” you nod with a tsk. “the only time we talked about it was when he was drunk and we were in bed cuddling. i told him that i loved him and he goes, i love you too— more than hannie.” you mock jaehyuns voice making johnnys wife laugh.
“johnny said that he’d pick the kids.” johnnys wife confesses and your jaw nearly drops.
Finding solace in bad decisions probably isn’t the best way to get over your cheating ex-boyfriend, but as you watch the strings of fate intertwine themselves with the four members of SAMURAI, you’re starting to think the universe is sending you a sign to do just that. A drummer with a sex addiction, an alcoholic with trust issues, a stoner who’s always high and the responsible leader who brings them all together – your mother taught you to never be greedy, but you can’t stop yourself from wanting all four. Question is, how bad do you they want you?
PAIRING: NCT Dream ‘00 line x Reader
GENRE: smut, fluff, angst, rocker!AU, band!AU, bassist!Renjun, drummer!Jeno, guitarist!Haechan, guitarist!Jaemin, strangers to lovers, enemies to lovers, friends with benefits.
WARNINGS: sexual content (fingering, blowjobs, oral sex, vaginal sex, multiple orgasms, voyeurism, public sex, shower sex, threesomes, orgasm denial, creampie, choking, restraints, sex toys, praise kink, daddy kink, rough sex, dom/sub dynamics, degradation), alcohol, smoking, marijuana use, mentions of cheating, toxic relationships, fuckboy behaviours, swearing.
WORD COUNT: 42.7k
AUTHOR’S NOTE: First of all, how the fuck did we get here? I swear this was never meant to be more than just a simple rocker!AU, but the word count still amazes me months after I’ve finished the whole thing. I’d like to dedicate it to my amazing beta editor and writing buddy, @hoeforau, who is the other half of the brains behind this beast (happy belated birthday, bestie). I’d also like to thank Jewel / @domjaehyun for her writing tips - if it weren’t for them, I think I would’ve struggled a lot to make a story like this work. “Chippin’ In” is one of my babies, so please treat her well and show her love!
ABOUT THE STORY: This is based on the music of a fictional band named SAMURAI from Cyberpunk 2077 and other artists from the game/real life. I highly recommend listening to the songs as you move through the chapters! You can still enjoy the story without them, but you’ll be missing out on some good tunes and might not catch the lyrical references. The names in brackets are the real names of the artists/bands in case you want to find more of their songs.
Masterlist / Be added to my general taglist!
NOW PLAYING ▷ Archangel by SAMURAI (Refused)
QUEUED ▷▷ A Like Supreme by SAMURAI (Refused)
“Ki, pass me those cigs to your left, will you?”
The woman sitting across from you reaches for the black box that lays abandoned on the windowsill, handing it over to her friend as she says a quick “thanks” and pulls out a stick. Her lighter is already between her fingers as she puts it up to her lips, the familiar click filling the quiet of the diner as she lights the end and takes a deep drag before exhaling the smoke in the air.
“Quit fucking staring at me,” she mutters. “It’s not the first time you’ve seen me smoke.”
“You said you were done with all that,” your other friend, Kiyo, reminds her as she waves the cloud away from her face.
“I said I was going to cut down a bit, not quit entirely.”
“If cutting down means still smoking a pack a day, then you’re an idiot.”
“Tough talk coming from someone who can’t even go a minute without hitting her vape.”
Finding solace in bad decisions probably isn’t the best way to get over your cheating ex-boyfriend, but as you watch the strings of fate intertwine themselves with the four members of SAMURAI, you’re starting to think the universe is sending you a sign to do just that. A drummer with a sex addiction, an alcoholic with trust issues, a stoner who’s always high and the responsible leader who brings them all together – your mother taught you to never be greedy, but you can’t stop yourself from wanting all four. Question is, how bad do you they want you?
PAIRING: NCT Dream ‘00 line x Reader
GENRE: smut, fluff, angst, rocker!AU, band!AU, bassist!Renjun, drummer!Jeno, guitarist!Haechan, guitarist!Jaemin, strangers to lovers, enemies to lovers, friends with benefits.
WARNINGS: sexual content (fingering, blowjobs, oral sex, vaginal sex, multiple orgasms, voyeurism, public sex, shower sex, threesomes, orgasm denial, creampie, choking, restraints, sex toys, praise kink, daddy kink, rough sex, dom/sub dynamics, degradation), alcohol, smoking, marijuana use, mentions of cheating, toxic relationships, fuckboy behaviours, swearing.
WORD COUNT: 42.7k
AUTHOR’S NOTE: First of all, how the fuck did we get here? I swear this was never meant to be more than just a simple rocker!AU, but the word count still amazes me months after I’ve finished the whole thing. I’d like to dedicate it to my amazing beta editor and writing buddy, @hoeforau, who is the other half of the brains behind this beast (happy belated birthday, bestie). I’d also like to thank Jewel / @domjaehyun for her writing tips - if it weren’t for them, I think I would’ve struggled a lot to make a story like this work. “Chippin’ In” is one of my babies, so please treat her well and show her love!
ABOUT THE STORY: This is based on the music of a fictional band named SAMURAI from Cyberpunk 2077 and other artists from the game/real life. I highly recommend listening to the songs as you move through the chapters! You can still enjoy the story without them, but you’ll be missing out on some good tunes and might not catch the lyrical references. The names in brackets are the real names of the artists/bands in case you want to find more of their songs.
Masterlist / Be added to my general taglist!
NOW PLAYING ▷ Archangel by SAMURAI (Refused)
QUEUED ▷▷ A Like Supreme by SAMURAI (Refused)
“Ki, pass me those cigs to your left, will you?”
The woman sitting across from you reaches for the black box that lays abandoned on the windowsill, handing it over to her friend as she says a quick “thanks” and pulls out a stick. Her lighter is already between her fingers as she puts it up to her lips, the familiar click filling the quiet of the diner as she lights the end and takes a deep drag before exhaling the smoke in the air.
“Quit fucking staring at me,” she mutters. “It’s not the first time you’ve seen me smoke.”
“You said you were done with all that,” your other friend, Kiyo, reminds her as she waves the cloud away from her face.
“I said I was going to cut down a bit, not quit entirely.”
“If cutting down means still smoking a pack a day, then you’re an idiot.”
“Tough talk coming from someone who can’t even go a minute without hitting her vape.”
warnings: 18+ content, read at your own discretion.
summary: you wake up with a desire for your boyfriend's cock even though he gave it to you so good the previous night. luckily for you, jeno doesn't mind satisfying your hunger.
you woke to the beautiful sound of gunfire coming from your boyfriend’s computer. what a perfect way to start your day.
once the fact that you were butt naked had settled in, you shifted around, looking for something to throw on so that you could be somewhat decent for the early (it was not) hour. jeno’s black t-shirt seemed to do the trick.
stretching your body, you let out an animalistic scream (thereby signaling your awakening) and sauntered over to jeno’s side. he paid you absolutely no mind, clicking away on his keyboard with his nose only a centimeter away from the monitor. you had come to the conclusion that the only two things that mattered to him were his games and your pussy, nothing more and nothing less.
the previous night served the perfect example to support your claim. after losing a round of valorant, he had gotten up from his chair, grabbed both your ankles, and forcefully yanked you down the bed, completely ignoring the fact that you were trying to do your homework. before you could protest, he tugged your pants off and pushed two slender fingers inside your walls. then of course, you -being a total sucker for his heavenly digits- succumbed to your desires and allowed him to make you cum (spoiler alert: he made you squirt). you thought things would conclude there, that you’d both be on your merry ways, but you were wrong. seeing you cum once didn’t satisfy him enough, and so, he pulled his dick out and fucked the living shit out of you until you were a screaming, crying mess. once he was done, he went back to his computer, starting a new round with his comrades as he if hadn’t just shoveled his way through your pussy.
essentially, that was why you had woken up naked, and as you stood by him now, you felt a familiar urge brew inside you. biting your lip, you trailed a finger up his neck, making him shudder. brushing your hand away, he continued ignoring you. just cause he’d shunted you didn’t mean you were going to give up. you ruffled his hair and plopped down on his lap. jeno said nothing, adjusting his position so that his arms went around you, trapping you between his chest and the computer. you threw an arm around his shoulder, crossing your legs, and leaned up against him.
you stared at his face, admiring every little detail. you sure had gotten lucky with this one. jeno wasn’t phased by your intense observing and you were starting to get antsy by the lack of acknowledgment. you needed him to pay attention to you so that you could get to the point. perhaps he needed some innocent distractions.
now your method of choice was far from innocent, but it served its purpose. your lips found his skin, a spot right under his jaw where you knew he couldn’t hide a reaction. you could feel him start to tense up underneath you. the clicking of his fingers on the keyboard slowed as you successfully stole his attention away.
“what are you doing?” he asked inanely, despite knowing exactly what you wanted. you didn’t answer him, instead intensifying your kisses. his jaw clenched and he let out a short breath. “you’re still horny? didn’t i fuck you hard enough last night?”
there it was. those were the exact words you’d been waiting to hear. when you pulled away jeno knew he had the answer to his question. scoffing in disbelief, he saved his game and hooked two arms under your knees, effortlessly lifting you up. "you're so needy," he said, tossing you on the bed.
scrambling up it excitedly, you welcomed jeno on top of you. he captured your lips in a strong kiss, squeezing your waist gently. he tasted like red bull and tortilla chips and you were starting to wonder if he’d even gone to sleep after he’d taken care of you last night.
before you could deepen the kiss, he pulled away and started trailing kisses down your neck, simultaneously slipping a hand between your legs. with a few quick rubs to your clit, he made you wet enough to easily slip two fingers inside your walls. jeno was clearly not wasting any time. he began pumping his fingers in and out of you, making your toes curl. the feeling of his warm lips on your skin made your breaths falter. “feels so good,” you murmured, holding onto his shoulders. he hummed against your skin and sat up, pulling you along with him. taking his fingers out of you, he placed them against your lips, prompting you to lick them clean. you sucked on them, maybe a second too long, but he was satisfied.
pushing his shorts down, he brought your mouth to his cock. you wrapped your fingers around his base and started bobbing your head up and down, feeling him harden up against your tongue. jeno hissed and groaned, letting you go on a little longer than he’d intent, really taking in the pleasure before pulling you away from him. he made you lay back down again and spread your legs, rubbing his tip along your slit. once he entered you, he raised your knees to your chest and began pounding into you without missing a beat. he was going harder than he had last night and suddenly you felt like he was trying to prove a point.
the sheer force of his thrusts was making the bed shake and squeak underneath you two. your upper thighs were starting to go numb too cause of the way his hips were practically slapping against your skin. you felt like you hadn’t mentally prepared yourself for this. after waking up mere minutes ago, getting railed by your boyfriend wasn’t very easily registered. your mind was a little foggy and the pleasure felt unreal. still, you couldn’t get enough of it.
his cock was moving so deep inside you, hitting all the spots at just the right time. you could feel his nails digging into your skin. the way he was grunting near your ear turned you on even more. not only did he fuck you real good, but he also looked amazing while he did it, and you couldn’t get enough of him.
soon enough you felt a knot beginning to form in your stomach. you’d been longing for it so bad and it was finally here. “i’m gonna cum,” you warned him, gripping onto his shoulders desperately. even though it seemed like he couldn’t, he started fucking you faster, earnestly chasing your orgasm. a few strong thrusts later he sent you into a thigh quivering orgasm. he continued pounding into you, fueled on by the arousal that gushed down your walls and he wasn’t done by the time the overstimulation began settling in.
a string of curses later, he buried his face in the crook of your neck and snapped his hips into you, letting his seed fill you up. he rode out his high with a few sloppy thrusts and pulled out of you, falling limp at your side. you had a giddy smile on your face, feeling warm and tingly all over. “what if i tell you i still want more?”
jeno looked over at you, completely unfazed. “i would not be surprised.”
in which painter!reader asks her boyfriend, jaehyun, to help her with her art.
and that’s when jaehyun decided to bring out the kit.
PAIRING/CHARACTERS ✎ jaehyun x fem!reader
GENRE/CATEGORY ✎ smut
CONTENT WARNINGS ✎ 18+, nipple/breast play, using paint during sex (does paint play exist ? lol), unprotected sex (wrap it before u tap it), riding, missionary, doggy style, hair pulling (m&f), spanking
WORD COUNT ✎ 2.3k
GELA SAYS ✎ …oh my god sorry for being absent for so long lmao my semester just ended and honestly i had a hard time writing so i had to take a break for awhile and now i’m back ! this feels rushed (because it is :/) but i hope ya’ll will like it <3 please excuse the typos and grammatical errors, i’ll edit it once i find the time :D enjoy ! also pls lmk if i missed anything on the warnings ~
𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: na jaemin x reader
𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐑𝐄: smut, angst, fluff
𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒: ever since eunbin came back into the picture, you start to truly realise where you stand and what you want from jaemin... but nothing ever really goes the way it's supposed to go
𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓: 30.9k
𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: slow burn, so much plot and too much dialogue, friends with benefits, friends to possible lovers, the majority of kpop 00' liners are in this, other nct members make appearances, crackhead humour throughout, a lot of sex innuendos, college!jaemin, black haired jaemin, jaemin is super mysterious and hot, a lot of angst in this one, heartbreaking moments maybe, bring tissues besties, explicit content, swearing, jaemin gets a handjob, jaemin kinda turns into a sub... kinda, the reader honestly controls the situation, reader rides jaemin in a chair yeehaw, lingering kisses as always, soft sex almost sickening, miwoo points out the obvious, the backstory of the ring is FINALLY here, also jeno tells his true feelings about eunbin, eunbin explains relationship from her side, jeno and reader besties, donghyuck yangyang and reader trio moments, also jeno yangyang donghyuck and reader moments, jeno and reader moments, yangyang comes to a realisation, reader also comes to a realisation, jeno meets eunbin, a lot of mentions of anxiety here and there, perhaps new haired jaemin maybe who knows, alcohol consumption, drunken mishaps... drunk words = sober thoughts?, the girls have a moment, reader meets red haired beauty, a lot of mentions of the trip, overuse of the word pretty
𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐎𝐍𝐄 ‣ 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐓𝐖𝐎 ‣ 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄 ‣ 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑
[the insta posts]
You’re silent the entire trip to the café, head hung low and your hands buried deep into your armpits to keep them warm but the cold air that nips at your face and bare legs distract you, unable to focus on any source of warmth.
Your teeth chatter and you’re so desperate to turn around and go back home but with the constant buzz of your phone in your pocket, you know turning back wasn’t an answer. They are waiting for you at the café, for you and Jaemin.
Anxiety seeps through your veins when you start to think about Jaemin and his long awaited conversation he’s about to have with Eunbin, it makes your stomach churn and your heart race but you try to keep yourself calm as you breathe steadily. There was no reason for you to feel the way that you are, you remind yourself as you near towards your destination. You don’t understand the exact feeling… but you shouldn’t be feeling it.
The bell rings above your head as you push open the door to the cafe, instantly spotting your group of friends sitting around a table near the back. You can’t help but smile when you see them laugh together, watching Donghyuck, who’s already offended at whatever's been said at the table, swat away Jeno’s hand as he tries to reach out and squeeze his cheeks.
A soft call of your name comes from your right and you turn to face the person belonging to the voice, seeing Kun standing behind the counter with Jisung and Chenle at his side. You almost fail to notice that girl standing behind Chenle, staring out into the customers with wide eyes and you nearly awe at the sight until the former snaps his fingers in your direction, ushering you forwards.
“Don’t snap your fingers at our customers” Kun seethes through his teeth, pinching the top of Chenle’s ear as a warning and Jisung smiles in amusement, nudging the new workers shoulder to capture her attention and even she starts to snicker at the sight in front of her.
Chenle rips away from Kun’s grasp, glaring at the trio as he cradles the sore area on his ear. He threatens to hit Jisung for smiling, raising his arm to get ready to strike but Jisung grabs the newest worker and holds her out in front of him, acting as a shield.
Kun looks at them, shaking his head in disappointment before he turns to face you, sending you an apologetic smile. “Sorry about that brat… Do you want your usual?”
“It’s okay, I’m fine” You shake your head, jabbing your thumb in the direction of your friends. “I’m gonna go…”
Kun nods in understanding, waving you away and you bid him a quick goodbye as you turn on your heel, making your way over to the group who fail to recognize your arrival until you stand behind Shotaro, capturing the attention of Renjun and Haru.
“Nice of you to finally show up” Renjun gives you a sarcastic smile and you flip him off with a smile of your own. Shotaro leans his head back, bumping into your stomach and the way he grins up at you makes your heart warm. You coo softly, raking your fingers through his hair and scratching at his scalp as if he was a cute little puppy.
Donghyuck reaches out to grab your wrist and tug you towards the empty seat between Yangyang and himself, forcing you to sit down and he gasps in shock as his knuckles accidentally brush against your cold legs.
“Why the fuck didn’t you wear anything warmer?!” Donghyuck scolds you angrily just as Yangyang slips off his coat and wraps it around your frame. You open your mouth to protest but you sigh in defeat as he fastens a few of the buttons while Donghyuck takes this opportunity to drape his own coat over your bare legs, rubbing for extra warmth and continues to scold you with interesting profanities.
You don't bother explaining to them why you had took so long to come nor did you explain to them why you showed up alone, allowing them to continue talking about whatever they were talking about before you arrived, watching as Miwoo dramatically throws her hands in the air as Renjun nonchalantly insults her way as he tries, and succeeds, in riling her up.
Jeno doesn’t say much, to your surprise, as he watches the two bicker, quietly drinking his iced coffee. He wears a tight fitted beanie on his head which makes his eyebrows and his eyes seem a lot more intimidating when he stares or is focussed on something, it makes your heart thump when he glances over to the table to meet your gaze.
He sends you a tight lipped smile which you give back, a small silent greeting between the two of you, before he turns his attention back to the phone in his hand, using his thumb to swipe across the screen.
“Why are you so quiet?” A voice lowly asks from beside you and you turn your head to meet Yangyang’s concerned expression. You shrug your shoulders, uncertain on how to give him an answer and the frown on his face deepens.
“Are you sick?” Donghyuck asks this time in a sincere tone which he rarely lets out, removing his hand from it’s position on your legs to press against your forehead. He hums. “Your temperature is fine”
“I’m just tired” You tell them.
Donghyuck mocks offense as he points at himself. “From me?” He then points at Yangyang. “From us?”
You roll your eyes, not being able to stop the smile that threatens to spread across your lips. “Shut up”
“We can take you home, if you want?” Yangyang offers and Donghyuck nods beside you. “We haven’t got anything planned for the rest of the day anyways, so we can leave”
“I’m good” You shake your head, reassuring them that you’re fine despite the hesitancy in your voice. Yangyang eyes you for a few seconds before believing your words, nodding his head while reaching for his drink. Donghyuck doesn’t budge, staring straight at you without even blinking and you take this opportunity to stare back, having an inner staring content which Donghyuck catches onto immediately as the corner of lips lift upwards into a smirk.
You shout in surprise when Donghyuck cheats by clapping his hands in your face and you ball your own hands into tight fists, jabbing them at his chest and arms that he tries to dodge, defending himself by karate chopping your own body with ‘whooshing’ sounds.
“If either of you knock over any coffee, I will start attacking” Chenle warns as he appears beside the table with a tray of breakfast specials in hand, eyeing the half full coffee cups that are scattered across the table. “I’m on cleanup duty today and if I see one drop of coffee on the floor, I swear to god I will—”
Miwoo scoffs. “Okay, we get it you little brat”
“Do you want to die?” Chenle mouths scarily just as Kun arrives over to the table, taking it upon himself to grab the plates from the tray Chenle holds, placing them down on the table. Your group gives Kun an odd look to why he was setting all types of pastries and cakes on the table. He tells you all that they’re his newest recipes and he’s handing them out for your group to test try, completely free of charges which makes them all grin widely but Yangyang points at Kun, seemingly not convinced.
“Are you trying to poison us?”
Kun gives him a blank look. “If I wanted to poison you, I would’ve done it with your drinks already”
Yangyang purses his lips together in deep thought. “Hm, touche”
Kun rolls his eyes and takes a hold of Chenle’s upper arm to tug him away from your table. Chenle withstands for a moment before giving in, allowing Kun to drag him away but he keeps his glare on Miwoo who throws her middle finger up in his direction, an evil smirk spreading across her face as Chenle seethes through his teeth before he’s pulled into the backroom.
“Kun treats us so well” Haru says as she picks up a chocolate coated croissant and bites into it, eyes widening and letting out a gasp as she chews. She holds out the treat towards Renjun who takes a bite without question, seemingly impressed as he nods his head, licking the chocolate off of the corner of his lips.
Your mouth salivates as Haru turns the croissant towards the rest of you to show what’s inside, chocolate and what looks like banana slices oozing from where it has been bitten open.
Donghyuck groans. “I think I just came in my pants''
“So…” Miwoo begins after a short moment of silence, the group too preoccupied with eating their breakfasts or drinking their coffees to even start another conversation. Everyone’s heads turn to Miwoo who dips one of her cinnamon breadsticks in a little bowl of syrup, chewing the treat slowly as her eyes roam across the room until they focus on you. “Is nobody going to question the obvious or are you all going to make me do it?”
“What are you talking about?” Donghyuck questions with a full mouth and Yangyang leans over your body to whack the back of his head for his lack of manners, making Donghyuck almost choke on his toast as he coughs uncontrollably. You pat Donghyuck’s back, hoping to help him in some way as you try and stifle your laugh, almost losing as Donghyuck turns to thank you with strained eyes.
“Oh, come on… you can’t be that dense” Miwoo chuckles, attention flickering to Donghyuck for a second before going back to you. “Where’s Jaemin?”
Your throat immediately dries up, mouth clamped shut and unable to answer her simple question. The way the group has their attention on you causes you to panic, legs beginning to nervously bounce under the table and fists curl tightly, nails digging into palm.
Haru’s the first to notice, calling your name softly as she reaches across the table to touch your hand, concern filling her eyes as she tries to slip her fingers between your clenched fists, hoping to discreetly pull your nails away from your skin.
She calls your name again, squeezing your hand gently to help coax you out of your panic state. You blink, trying to out blur your eyes and ignore the faint buzzing noise in your ears as you turn towards Haru, allowing her to slip her fingers between yours.
“You good?” Renjun speaks up first, concern evident in his tone. “We lost you there for a second”
“I’m fine” You lie through your teeth and you know they don’t believe you so you clear your throat, grabbing Yangyang’s coffee to take a sip. He doesn’t stop you, like he’d usually would, whining about how you should’ve bought your own. Instead, he just stares. He watches.
Jeno’s even looking at you now and with all their eyes on you, you feel like you’re going to throw up. You swallow thickly, opening your mouth to speak but Haru beats you to it, easily grabbing everyone’s attention off of you as she whips out her phone to announce new music from an artist that you all liked.
The gasps and the excitement was enough to allow the heavy weight to lift off of your chest and you smile gratefully at Haru who sends a wink your way. She’s always got your back, she’s always the one to help you out of a sticky situation and you couldn’t be more thankful than you already are.
You quietly excuse yourself from the table, pushing Donghyuck’s coat off of your legs and into his lap as you stand up, beginning to unbutton Yangyang’s coat but with the look he gives you, you decide against it, giving him your best smile before disappearing to the bathroom.
Once you’re alone, you make a straight beeline for the sink, twisting the tap and sticking your wrists under the cold running water. Your thumb massages the cold water into your skin and you slowly feel your body relax, the anxiety peeling away from your bones and leaving you at peace.
You raise your head to stare at your reflection in the mirror and tired eyes stare back. Your lips twist into a grimace, you look horrible, but you can’t seem to find the urge to care about your appearance, not when there’s so much shit going on inside your head.
Turning off the tap and drying your hands, you slip your hand under Yangyang’s coat to fish your phone out of your hoodie, unlocking the device and tapping the message icon to bring up yours and Jaemin’s last conversation, eyes scanning over the last text that he sent, how urgent he was for you. Your thumbs begin to move against the keyboard.
you: what are u talki . . . ERASED
you: is eunbin still . . . ERASED
you: are u . . . ERASED
What the fuck are you even supposed to say? You sigh in frustration, rubbing at your forehead as you stare down at the blank message. You don’t want to interrupt him from the conversation and you most definitely don’t want to seem like a stalker by constantly messaging him, but you’re worried… for him? For Eunbin? Or was it for you?
you: i hope ur okay
You click send, watching the delivered sign appear at the bottom before shoving the device away, not wanting to wait and see if he’s read the message. Taking a deep breath, you hold your head high as you walk out of the bathroom, heading back over to your table and sitting down just in time to hear Renjun and Miwoo bicker back and forth over something that has the others laughing.
Haru smiles at you the second you sit down and Donghyuck loosely throws his arm around your shoulders, his other leaning on the table as he takes pictures of the pair fighting, trying his best to get their worse angles and closeups that almost have you snorting.
Yangyang makes a small, harmless comment to add fuel to Renjun and Miwoo’s fire, he splutters in shock as the two turn on him, throwing creative insults and curse words his way and Donghyuck joins in to defend his friend, his arm dropping from your shoulders and putting his phone down on the table to alternate between pointing at them and throwing up his middle finger.
“You’re quieter than usual” Jeno says to you and you almost have trouble hearing him if it wasn’t for him leaning around Donghyuck’s chair to speak to you. He gives you a smile. “I know you said you’re fine earlier, but… you good?”
“It’s been a long morning” You tell him, wrapping your arms around your middle with a soft chuckle. “I’m just ready for this day to be over already”
“Yeah?” Jeno raises a brow, leaning his chin on the back of his chair as he stares at you. “What happened?”
You pause for a moment, teeth chewing at the side of your cheek as you contemplate on whether to tell Jeno the truth. He deserves to know the truth… that’s his best friend.
You suck in a breath. “It’s Eunbin… She’s back”
The silence is deafening and you flinch at the way everyone’s heads abruptly snap in your direction, eyes wide as your words slowly sink in. Renjun struggles to form a sentence, his mouth opening and closing repeatedly and Shotaro remains frozen with a fork hanging out of his mouth while Yangyang and Donghyuck share unreadable looks with each other.
Jeno’s reaction scares you the most and the way Miwoo worryingly glances over at him fails to settle your nerves. He’s silent, eyes staring straight into yours, dark and heavy. Miwoo softly calls out his name and despite them being on not good terms, she reaches to place her hand on top of his in hopes to calm him down.
“When did she get back?” Haru asks first, taking a brief glance at the boys. “Wasn’t she in New York?”
“She said she flew in early this morning”
“You’ve talked to her?” Donghyuck gapes, eyes almost bulging out of his head as he stares at you in shock. You slowly nod your head to confirm and Donghyuck abruptly turns in his seat to face Jeno who’s looking at Miwoo now. She’s speaking to him quietly, words just for him as she pats his hand, trying her best to calm him down which seems to be working as he listens intently, jaw still stiff but eyes gentle.
“How did you talk to her?” Shotaro asks this time with a frown. “How did that even happen?”
“I went to go see Jaemin this morning…” You trail off, nerves beginning to kick in as your teeth gnaw at your bottom lip. “Eunbin’s there”
Yangyang almost chokes on his own saliva. “She’s there?”
You nod your head. “Yeah… She wanted to see Jaemin as soon as she flew in”
“Did Jaemin let her in?” Jeno finally speaks, tone low and scary. You almost gulp at the way he’s now looking at you and you forget to speak, cowering back into your chair with goosebumps rising at the back of your neck. Jeno tongues his cheek, jaw tense and brows furrowing as he stares straight at you, already piecing together what you are going to say.
He knows the answer. He hates that he knows the answer. Jeno shakes his head, reaching for his coffee and taking a lengthy sip through his straw, fingers wrapping around the plastic cup so tightly you’re afraid it will spill.
Donghyuck, Yangyang, Shotaro and Renjun all share a look with each other that doesn’t go unnoticed by you or the girls. You want to say something, anything, but you can’t find the right words and the sentences and the questions that float around in your head refuse to make sense… you also didn't want to make the situation worse knowing that if you say something wrong, Jeno could blow.
“So that’s why you came here alone” Miwoo states, shaking her head with a laugh of disbelief. “He’s a fucking idiot”
“Miwoo” You warn her, shaking your head softly and giving her a pleading smile.
“What? I’m telling the truth” Miwoo shrugs innocently, leaning back into her seat. “He’s a fucking idiot for not being here with us right now. I know you’re all thinking it, I’m just brave enough to actually say it”
Miwoo shoves her spoon into her yoghurt and eats happily, oblivious to the way everyone is looking at her. You can see Jeno wants to retaliate to her words, his jaw tense and eyes rolling in annoyance.
“I mean, I hate to admit it but she’s not wrong” Donghyuck admits, leaning his arms on the table comfortably. Miwoo clicks her tongue and points at Donghyuck, grinning at the fact he’s agreeing with her and Donghyuck flips her off before continuing. “He is an idiot for not being here… but I don’t exactly blame him, you know, the hold that Eunbin has on him is—“
“Dude” Yangyang cuts him off, shaking his head as if to tell him to shut up and Donghyuck does with a sigh, muttering under his breath how he was just trying to explain how unbelievable Eunbin is.
A part of you wanted to hear what Donghyuck had to say, wanting to know how Eunbin was to Jaemin and the type of hold Donghyuck had claimed she had on him but the other part of you is happy that you didn’t have to hear anything, knowing that the weird feeling in your chest will grow heavier, becoming uncomfortable and unbearable.
Yangyang knocks his shoulders against yours and you lift your head to meet his eyes. He smiles at you, a soft smile, a comforting one that you can’t help but let yourself smile back at. Yangyang leans his head down closer to yours, his voice low as he whispers to you, asking if you would like to go home and you nod without even thinking much about it. You didn’t want to be here anymore.
The two of you stand up from your seats together, Yangyang opening his mouth to let them know that you two are going to leave until the bell above the cafe door dings as it's pushed open, revealing Jaemin. He’s alone, sporting his favourite black hoodie with a white cat and some sweats with a cap on top of his head.
The way the group stops talking and turns their heads towards him makes your cheeks feel hot. It’s obvious you were all talking about him and you know that Jaemin knows just by how he’s looking at you all, brows furrowing and his jaw tense.
Once Jaemin’s eyes land on you, he gives you the kindest smile. He looks okay. He seems okay. Maybe the talk he had with Eunbin made everything better… But was that even a good thing or a bad thing?
Yangyang presses his hand on your lower back, a sign for you to move so you both can leave and it doesn’t go unnoticed by Jaemin who immediately looks at Yangyang with a deadpan expression. Yangyang doesn’t falter, staring right back at Jaemin, almost giving him the same look back.
“Nice of you to finally show up” Yangyang speaks up first and you sigh, closing your eyes in annoyance, not liking the tone Yangyang decides to use.
Jaemin doesn’t even bother to reply, instead he pulls his hand out of his pockets and holds it out for you to take. You stare at his hand, your own twitching at your side, desperate to intertwine your fingers with his own.
“Let’s go” He says to you with another one of his soft smiles.
“But you just got here…” Shotaro states, looking at Jaemin with a slight pout. He gestures towards the empty seat that everyone had left for him if he had decided to show up. “Come eat with us”
“I’m not hungry” Jaemin tells him apologetically, turning his attention back on you. His hand is still outstretched, waiting for you to take but for some reason, you’re hesitant. Why are you so hesitant? Your body earns for his touch yet the inner voice inside of your head prevents you from doing so, not only making you frustrated but annoyed.
“Are you avoiding us because you don’t want to talk about who showed up at your front door this morning?” Miwoo teases with a sly grin, resting her chin on her hand. Your tongue pokes at your cheek in annoyance as you glance over your shoulder at her, shaking your head as she gives you an innocent smile. “Come on, big boy… we wanna hear all about it”
Jaemin lets out a halfhearted chuckle, clearly unamused with Miwoo’s words as he clicks his tongue against his teeth. Haru nudges Miwoo’s foot with her own and gives her a look that immediately makes Miwoo shut down, a pout present on her face as she drinks her coffee while grumbling how she was genuinely curious.
“Can we go to your place?” Jaemin asks you quietly as your attention turns back on him, eyes almost pleading for you to take his hand and leave with him. “I want to talk to you”
You nod your head slowly, reaching out to touch his hand and his fingers clasp around yours just as you make contact, immediately tugging you into his side. He gives your hand a squeeze, letting out a shaky breath as he presses his lips to yours for a quick peck before he guides you out of the cafe, not even saying goodbye to the others who watch with mixed reactions.
Yangyang’s arm drops to his side in defeat, breathing out a huff as he sits back down into his seat and Donghyuck pats his back, giving him a tight lipped smile which Yangyang forced himself to give back, a twinge of sadness in his eyes.
“So, how did it go?” The question you’re dreading to ask slipped out before you could even process it, chewing on your bottom lip as you sit down on your bed, scooting backwards to rest against the wall and you go to bring your knees up to your chest until Jaemin pushes your legs down, crawling on the bed and plopping his head down in your lap.
You pull the cap off of his head so he wouldn’t have to lay at an awkward angle and place it down to your side, allowing him to be more comfortable and he sighs softly, relaxing into your touch the second he feels your fingers play with his hair.
He’s quiet for a few minutes, the silence deafening and it makes you uncomfortable, biting back the urge to question him again because you didn’t want to seem desperate… you didn’t want to seem too—
“It went really good”
Really good. His words repeat in your mind and your face turns sour without you even realising, tongue prodding at your cheek in annoyance as you stare at the wall opposite you. Jaemin grins up at you in amusement, raising his hand to flick your forehead and you hiss, rubbing your hand over the sore area as you glare down at Jaemin but all he does is chuckle.
“I told her how I felt about her leaving” He starts off and you listen intently, dropping your hand down to his stomach where his own hands lay, letting him fiddle with your cold fingers. “I was honest with my feelings, made her understand how even though I was happy she wanted to follow her dreams and actually got what she wanted, she hurt me in the process. Eunbin got upset and apologised a bunch of times… she admitted to being selfish, which was weird to hear, I didn’t expect her to say that and I didn’t really know how to react”
You frown softly. “Why?”
“I don’t know” He mumbles with a shrug of his shoulders. “I guess I never really expected the conversation to go so smoothly, you know? But I’m happy I did it… I got my closure, and I think we’re fine now”
And you’re left unsatisfied. You purse your lips together, not liking the weird feeling lingering in the back of your mind. Something was bugging you about his answer and you struggle to pinpoint what it was. He said so much… yet he said so fucking little. You itched to ask more questions, to demand more answers but it wasn’t your place. It will never be your place.
Jaemin’s quick to notice how quiet you’ve become, pushing himself up on his elbows to kiss your lips softly but he pulls back before you can enjoy it so you follow his lips for more. The sound of his deep chuckle makes you pause and you blink a few times before moving away, fighting back a shy smile.
Jaemin tilts his head to the side as he stares at you with a grin, pecking your mouth once more before his hands grip your body, quickly manoeuvring you both into a lying position. His arm slips under your head and wraps around your shoulder as he pulls you into his chest, his fingers smoothing your hair as your own come to rest at his hip, massaging the skin mindlessly.
“Jaem…” You call out his name softly and he hums, letting you know he heard you. “What’s going to happen between you and Eunbin now?” He makes a noise of confusion and you start to cringe at yourself for making this situation a little awkward. “Are you and Eunbin, like, friends now?”
“I don’t really care” Jaemin admits, shrugging his shoulders carelessly as he twirls your hair around his fingers.
You crane your head to look up at him, surprised. “You don’t?”
“No” He answers easily, looking up at your ceiling. “If Eunbin wants to start fresh and be friends, I guess I’d be okay with that… But I’m not going to be making the first move”
“Would you want to be friends with her?”
Jaemin looks at you now, his nose brushing against yours. The corner of his lips twitch upwards, fingers still twirling strands of your hair but he stops to cup your jaw, his thumb delicately rubbing small circles on your cheek. “What’s with all the questions?”
“I’m just trying to figure you out” You’re honest with him this time and Jaemin’s brows quirk in surprise. “You don’t say much in general but when you do, it’s hard to understand where you’re at mentally”
Jaemin doesn’t say anything to that. Instead, he just smiles and goes back to playing with your hair. You hiss in pain when it gets stuck around his rings and he utters small amounts of apologies while laughing as he untangles your hair from around his jewellery, cooing and patting your head to calm you down but you curse loudly, hitting your fist against his chest for payback even though it was a complete accident that your hair got caught.
The two of you relax in silence for a couple of minutes, Jaemin’s fingers resuming in playing with your hair which would’ve pushed away if it wasn’t for the fact it was making you tired, the warmth of his embrace adding to the effect but you force yourself to stay awake, staring at Jaemin who’s eyes flutter shut, his breathing steady.
“Jaemin” You call out his name softly, pushing his messy bangs out of his face and he hums. “Did you… Did you mean what you said earlier?”
His one eye opens to stare at you and he feels hot under your touch, focussing on the way your hand pushes back his hair while his own pauses in yours. He remembers what he had told you earlier before he was left alone with Eunbin, he remembers it well, loud and clear.
Both of his eyes peel open as Jaemin blinks at you and you immediately what the bed to swallow you whole at his lack of words, wanting to disappear and have him forget you asking such a stupid question and you nearly escape from his embrace until you see him slowly begin to nod.
“Yeah” He says, gaze unmoving from yours. “Yeah, I meant it”
Your face warms and you struggle to speak, unable to form a proper sentence. “Cool”
You immediately cringe at your response, almost slapping yourself for being and sounding so awkward but Jaemin seems to find your answer amusing as a smile slips across his lips. With the arm that’s wrapped around you, he tugs you closer to kiss you. He kisses you so softly, his hand stilling in your hair as the other comes up to cup your cheeks.
You melt into his touch, reciprocating the kiss with the same amount of softness he’s giving you. The sounds of smooching fills the room, tongues mingling together with light feathery touches. Your heart hammers rapidly against your chest and you can’t help but wonder if Jaemin could feel it but you’re left unanswered yet again as his hand travels down from your cheek to grip your hip, pulling you on top of him.
You break the kiss to catch your breath, pressing your palms against Jaemin’s chest to sit up on his lap. His hands disappear beneath the sweatshirt you’re wearing, fingers gripping the flesh of your waist and kneading the skin, pressing his thumbs to your stomach.
“I miss feeling me here” He mutters under his breath, capturing his bottom lip between his teeth as he looks up at you, looking so pretty above him. He softly calls out to you. “Baby…”
His hands roam around your body, tickling your back with the pad of his fingers and you arch slightly as you feel his nails scratch at the bare skin, a teasing smile spreading across his face as he realises you’re not wearing a bra beneath the sweatshirt.
Jaemin sits up to pull the material over your head, carelessly discarding it to the floor which you usually would’ve gotten annoyed at if you weren’t already distracted by the way he’s looking at you. He smothers your face in gentle kisses while his hands caress your body. You sigh softly, closing your eyes as you bask in the feeling of his lips, goosebumps rising to your skin in his path. He nips at your jaw, neck, shoulders, making his way down to your chest and you shiver the second you feel his tongue press against your hardened bud.
“Jaemin” You gasp out his name as he mouths at your breast, sucking and nipping at the skin. You rake your fingers through his hair, gripping the roots as you tug his head back and his mouth drops open in surprise, breathing heavily. You try to steady your erratic heart while you stare at him. “You make me feel like I’m losing my mind sometimes”
He quirks a brow. “Is that a good thing or a bad thing?”
You suck in a breath as you feel his hands run down your body, fingers tugging at the strings of your shorts. Your bottom lip gets sucked between your teeth when you feel his hand dip inside your shorts and you let go of his hair to grip his shoulders as his fingers press against the damp patch of your underwear.
You gasp as you feel him push your panties to the side, his fingers prodding at your slick entrance. “Fuck I don’t know”
You and Jaemin spent the entire day in your room, rotating between watching movies and messy makeout sessions that left you both flustered and unsatisfied. Sex was absolutely thrown out of the window the second the entire group walked through the front door, talking loudly and laughing about whatever joke someone had said, completely ruining the mood for you and Jaemin, despite the first few times Jaemin tried to coax you into riding his dick but with Donghyuck and Yangyang on the other side of the wall, you knew you would both get caught and would never hear the end of it.
You really did not want to get teased by the two.
Jaemin stayed over for the night but left early in the morning, waking you up with a soft shake to tell you that he had to leave and explaining that jeno had been blowing up his phone, demanding to talk to him before classes today. He had kissed your forehead, bidding you a silent goodbye before disappearing and allowing you to go back to sleep, but that only lasted for an hour until you were up on your feet, getting your belongings ready for your classes later.
“Good morning” You’re instantly greeted when you step into the bathroom, seeing Haru standing in front of the mirror in just her underwear and a towel wrapped around her hair, pumping her bottle of moisturiser in her hands.
You give her a sleepy smile, sluggishly making your way over to the glass shower door that was already steamed from previous use, reaching around to turn the valve for the water. You yawn as you turn back to face Haru, almost stumbling over your feet while scratching the back of your head.
Haru snickers at your sleepy state and you flip her off while stretching out your limbs, letting out a groan. She eyes the shirt you’re wearing, a celine tie-dyed shirt that clearly didn’t belong to you.
“Did Jaemin spend the entire night?” Haru asks and you hum in response, leaning against the glass shower door as you watch her apply the moisturiser to her face, rubbing it into her skin. She glances at you briefly before looking back at her reflection in the mirror. “Did he say anything to you about Eunbin?”
“Yeah” You nod your head, dipping your hand under the showerhead to test the pressure and the warmth. “Kind of”
“Kind of?” Haru repeats, unwrapping her hair from the towel and picking up a serum bottle, applying small drops to her hair. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“He talked about her but—yawn—it wasn’t much. He didn’t go into full detail like I expected him to…” You pause to frown, looking down at your toes. “I guess I shouldn’t have expected him to anyways, it’s not my place”
Haru watches as you strip, kicking your clothes into a pile on the side before you jump into the shower, standing beneath the hot stream of water. Her tongue pokes at her cheek in thought, raking her fingers through her hair and sectioning it neatly.
She pops the question. “What were you expecting him to say?”
“I don’t know, honestly” You say with a shrug, soaping up your body with one of your favourite body washes, the scent of vanilla filling your nose. “But he told me he got his closure that he’s been wanting… that’s all that matters, I guess”
“What’s all that matters?” Miwoo’s voice fills the bathroom as she enters, quickly rushing to the toilet to pee. Haru mutters a quiet good morning which Miwoo responds back with the same greeting, grabbing a wad of toilet paper as she relieves herself. She covers her mouth to yawn. “What are we talking about?”
“Jaemin”
Miwoo scoffs. “Traitor”
You sigh at her tone, applying shampoo to your hair in silence as you listen to Miwoo complain about Jaemin’s absence at breakfast yesterday. She walks over to Haru after she finishes peeing, grabbing her toothbrush and squirting a decent amount of toothpaste all while sharing a look while Haru shrugs her shoulders, braiding two small braids at the front of her hair.
“What was meeting Eunbin like?” Miwoo asks you with a mouthful of toothpaste, almost choking until Haru slaps her hand on her back repeatedly.
“It was fine” You’re honest, you hated it. “She’s actually pretty sweet… I thought it would be different, like, someone completely different”
Miwoo hums, leaning over the sink to spit out the toothpaste before shoving her toothbrush back inside her mouth. “I don’t trust it”
“You don’t?” Haru queries and Miwoo shakes her head quickly. Haru furrows her brows, tilting her head to the side. “Why?”
“It’s strange” Miwoo resumes talking while brushing her teeth, looking at you through the reflection of the mirror as you peek your head around the glass door. “No matter what happened at the end of a relationship, no girl is ‘sweet’ or ‘kind’ to their ex's current girlfriend”
You pull a face. “But I’m not his girlfriend”
“And that’s even worse” Miwoo states, finishing up brushing her teeth and turning on the balls of her feet to face you. “You’re someone he fucks, you’re someone that gives him pleasure… god, she’s probably shaking with anger inside, that’s so funny”
Your eyes narrow at her words, slamming the glass door shut with a mutter. “You have a interesting way of explaining things”
“I just say it how I see it” She shrugs her shoulders, a frown slowly etching its way onto her lips and she places her hand on his hip. “I sense that tone in your voice… Why do you sound irritated?”
You couldn’t answer her, mainly because you didn’t know the answer yourself. You’re not sure why you sound irritated… Does there have to be a reason? Your shoulders slump in defeat. Of course there has to be a reason, so why couldn’t you figure it out?
The lack of answer makes Miwoo impatient and she pads over to the shower, sliding open the door. You yell out profanities and threats from the sudden scare, throwing water in her direction angrily and she snickers, stripping out of her clothes to jump inside the shower with you, making up excuses about how you all need to save water and money when you try and force her out.
You chew on the nail of your thumb in deep thought, scanning over the words written on your document page and sigh, pressing your finger down repeatedly on the backspace button as you type again, changing over your words and moving around the paragraphs that were in the wrong place.
You struggle, deeply, to write a piece for Professor Moon who had previously told his students to write about their most recent or at least favourite place you visited, adding how it needs details and realness… problem was you haven’t been anywhere outside of your hometown in months.
You’re going to fail.
If this wasn’t Donghyuck’s laptop, you’re positive you would’ve slammed the lid down and thrown it out of the library’s window without a care in the world by now, but you know how much he loves this laptop… and how bad he would kill you.
You lean back into your seat with a sigh, leg bouncing beneath the table and you rub your palms on your jeans, glancing around the half empty library, spotting a few familiar faces but the rest were unknown. Your eyes instinctively go to your bag that rests on the chair beside you, teeth sucking your bottom lip in between your teeth as you reach for it, dipping your hand inside and reaching for what you need at the bottom of the bag.
Nakamoto Yuta, NaYuTravels, +82-1-***-***. Professor Moon’s writing stares you back in the face. You purse your lips in deep thought, glancing back and forth between your messy document and the slip.
Ideas start to form in your head and before you can even register what you’re doing, your finger glides across the touchpad on the laptop, opening up a browser and typing in the website name, clicking the link that first pops up.
Your eyes widen as you’re instantly met with the most beautifully aesthetic page you have ever seen. It was minimal, so clean, so simple and organised even with its pictures and writings. Your hand presses to your mouth in surprise, your heart seems to swell at every incredible piece of writing you read and the photos that were attached to them made you feel—
Bzzt. Your phone vibrates loudly on the table and you’re instantly snapped out of your thoughts, reaching for the device quickly and shutting it off. The librarian peeps her head around her computer, narrowing her eyes at you and you send her a sheepish smile back, bowing your head apologetically and she resumes back to what she was doing while you cringe in embarrassment, unlocking your phone to see who had called you. Donghyuck. Of. Fucking. Course.
donghyuck: why did u decline my call bitchass bitch
you: i’m in the library u idiot
donghyuck: lol sorry
donghyuck: anyway are u still using my laptop??? i need it back to take some notes for class
You glance up at the screen, biting down on your cheek as your eyes scan over the page, a tight pulling at your chest.
you: yeah u can have it back. meet u outside the music dept in two??
donghyuck: ty, ly
You exit out of the website and shut down the laptop with a sigh, closing the lid and gathering your belongings in your arm as you leave the library, not even sparing the librarian a glance out of pure embarrassment. The hallways aren’t as crowded as they usually are, some lingered around with earphones plugged into their ears and others stood in small groups, mingling with their friends.
A familiar face appears around the corner and you recognise it’s Jeno, wearing his royal blue engineering overalls alongside another student who you’ve seen here and there whenever Jeno’s busy in class, his name tag reading Kim J.
Jeno waves when he sees you and you wave back before he disappears with his classmate, leaving you alone once more until you hear your name being called. You glance over your shoulder, slowly coming to a stop as you realise it’s Professor Moon calling out your name from his class and he ushers you on over.
“Professor Moon” You greet him quickly with a bow as you walk over. “I still haven’t finished the task you asked us to do, but I—”
“It’s fine” He dismisses it with a shake of his hand, adjusting his circular glasses on the bridge of his nose. “I actually called you over for a different reason. Please, come in and have a seat, it’s important”
“Oh” You blink, pointing to the laptop. “I need to give this to my friend before… I…” You trail off, eyes widening in surprise as you finally notice the red haired man behind him, sitting down on top of a desk with an ipad in hand, flicking across the screen. You’re speechless by the beauty of his man: his red hair resting just above his shoulders, ears decorated in the prettiest jewellery and a small chain hanging from his neck.
He’s adorned in a black and white striped button up shirt that's tucked loosely into the belt of his jeans and some converse. It was such a simple outfit that even most students on campus wear but on him, it looked expensive.
It’s Nakamoto Yuta. The voice screams inside your head. You’re unable to tear your eyes away from him. It’s fucking Nakamoto Yuta.
You almost drop your belongings in your hand as you immediately greet him and he looks up from his ipad to chuckle, placing it down on the desk beside him as he greets you back. Professor Moon clasps his hands together, a bright smile on his face.
“This is Nakamoto Yuta, the close friend of mine that organises those trips we discussed and this is the student that I was telling you about, the one that wanted to become a travel writer” Professor Moon introduces you both. He turns to face you, looking proud. “I was just showing him your works”
The red head looks impressed. “You’re really talented”
“Thanks Mr N—”
“You can call me Yuta” He stops you, a look of disgust spreading across his face. “Calling me Mr Nakamoto makes me feel old”
“Thanks” Professor Moon mutters beneath his breath. Yuta grins at that, playfully nudging Professor Moon as he walks by to get to his desk. You can see how close they both are, sending boyish grins to each other and it almost makes you smile seeing Professor Moon so relaxed and chilled, knowing that your class, especially Miwoo, doesn’t give him a break.
Yuta clears his throat and turns to face you. “I heard you were thinking about applying to the writer's trip that's coming up… but I haven’t seen your name on the list yet?”
“I haven’t signed up for it yet… I only just looked at your website this morning” You tell him, holding your stuff close to your chest as you awkwardly look down at your doc martens, feeling slightly embarrassed to be talking about this. “I’ve been busy with things, so… I haven’t really had the time to think about it. I don’t even know if I want to sign up to this trip yet”
Professor Moon eyes you from the side. “I thought you said you wanted to become a travel writer to follow in your mothers footsteps?”
You nod eagerly. “I do! I just…” But that’s when your nodding comes to a stop. You’re stuck again, unsure of the feeling that settles in your chest, unsure of what’s holding you back from agreeing to sign up for this trip that, admittingly, you desperately want to go on.
Miwoo and Haru seemed to support you going after they found out, and the boys didn’t seem opposed to you going, but then again you weren't able to hear their opinions when the subject was changed so quickly. You still haven’t brought it up to Jaemin yet, struggling to find the right moment which never seems to come… maybe that is what's holding you back?
“The trip doesn’t start until next month, so you only have a few weeks to figure out what you want to do” Yuta tells you, crossing his arms over his chest. “Personally, from what I’ve read, I think you should go. Not only do you have talent, but you even said it yourself, it’s something that you want to do… it's as simple as that”
“It’s not that simple” You mutter under your breath with a frown and Yuta chuckles, clearly hearing what you said. Your lips press together in embarrassment, mentally kicking yourself but the way Yuta smiles, you calm yourself down knowing he’s not offended.
“Okay, sure. It’s not that simple” Yuta nods, copying your words. “But nothing should be stopping you from doing what you want to do, especially if this is your dream” You don’t know why, but his words struck something inside you, an unsettling feeling swirling around in the pit of your stomach. Yuta clears his throat, giving you one of his award winning smiles as he tucks his hair behind his ears. “Anyways, I’m sure Taeil gave you my number on that slip, so don’t be afraid to contact me if you need some advice or need to talk about the trip. You can find my email on the website too… I would love to hear from you and I hope I can change your mind”
“I will” You nod, taking this as a sign to leave which you shortly do, bidding the two a quiet goodbye before stepping out of the classroom. You let out a deep breath, holding your belongings in one hand as the other rubs at the back of your neck, closing your eyes in relief.
You’re happy to be out of the classroom, no longer being watched by the two, your skin crawling with nerves beneath their stares. Despite feeling a little awkward and uncomfortable, you would be lying to yourself if you said you weren't excited that you met Yuta. It definitely put you in somewhat of a good mood and you can’t help the smile that etches onto your lips.
“What the hell?! Do you know how long I’ve been waiting?!” Donghyuck exclaims as you finally meet him in front of the music department, his arms thrown up in the air in disbelief before he taps the non-existent watch on his wrist. “I’ve been waiting for five minutes!!”
“You don’t even have a watch” You fight back, handing over the laptop which Donghyuck snatches from your grasp with a scowl which makes you roll your eyes. “Why did you want it back anyway?”
Donghyuck looks at you incredulously. “You’re asking me why I want my laptop back?” You give him a blank look, not amused with his attitude but he grins, reaching forward to pat your head. “Mark wouldn’t let me borrow his to write down some notes and Yangyang’s being a little bitch, so I had to use mine”
Your brow raises. “Mark?”
“Canadian”
“Oh”
“Apparently Aisha lied about seeing him by the w—” Donghyuck cuts himself off with a huff when something, or someone, knocks into his shoulder, making him fly forwards. Your hands reach out, immediately steadying him when he almost trips over his shoes. His head snaps towards the suspect, opening his mouth to attack with countless profanities and threats… but he’s quiet, eyes wide and round as he stares.
The suspect, a girl around the same age as you both, looks at him alarmed and quickly bows her head, multiple apologies coming from her lips with a muffled explanation of not knowing her own strength. You side eye Donghyuck who remains quiet and frozen, mouth ajar and you take it upon yourself to place your finger beneath his chin and push upwards to close his mouth, sending the panicked girl a kind smile.
You reassure her that everything is okay and she nods, sparing a quick glance at Donghyuck before she slips through the door of the music department, letting it fall shut behind her. Donghyuck blinks as he slowly turns his head towards you and you bite back a chuckle at the expression on his face.
“I love Professor Moon but if we ever get separated to do an assignment again, I will commit arson” Miwoo threatens as the three of you manage to meet up for lunch, sitting outside on campus due to the sunny weather, picking a spot beneath a try to hide in the shade. Miwoo pulls a plastic container out of her bag as she eyes you both. “I’m being serious, by the way”
“We know” Haru nods, opening up a pack of BBQ chips, munching on one slowly as she looks at the container. “What is that?”
“It’s a quinoa salad!!” Miwoo grins, ripping off the lid and showcasing her food like she had just won a trophy. “Doesn’t it look pretty?”
You hum with a nod, clearly impressed with her presentation while you unwrap your poorly made sandwich. Miwoo cheers to herself, grabbing her fork from her bag and happily digging into her food. You go to bite into your sandwich until she leans forwards, holding her fork out to you with a decent amount of food at the end.
She urges you to try and you don’t need to be told twice, already leaning in to try a bite. You chew, you swallow, you pause. Holy shit. Miwoo proudly pats herself on the back at your reaction, scooping up some more on her fork and holding it out to Haru who happily tries it next.
“What else have you put in that?” Haru grills her immediately, trying to take the plastic container out of her hands but Miwoo fights back, holding it close to her chest. Haru points at her. “You’ve put something else in there!! I’ve tried you quinoa salad before, you little bitch…”
“It’s a secret ingredient” Miwoo jabs her fork into the salad as she mutters. “Probably my tears”
“What?” You instantly say, hearing her loud and clear.
Miwoo’s head snaps towards you and she laughs, dismissing you with a shake of her hand. “I was kidding! You know I don’t cry!” You and Haru don’t seem convinced and Miwoo notices that straight away, sighing as she puts down her salad. “Look, I didn’t cry. It was a joke… but I made this salad in the midst of me and Jeno breaking up so that’s probab—”
“You and Jeno broke up?” Haru cuts her off out of shock, her eyes wide and unbelieving. Miwoo nods her head as she plays with her food. You and Haru share a look of disbelief and you gesture for her to continue. Haru blinks and turns back to Miwoo. “How? When?”
“Last night. It was a mutual discussion” She tells you, tucking her long hair neatly behind her ears as her bottom lip gets caught between her teeth. “Well, I initiated the conversation… he just went along with it and then we broke up, both agreeing that we argue too much”
You send a disappointing look her way. “And you didn’t think to talk before just… breaking up?”
“We would end up just arguing even more anyways” Miwoo’s brows furrow with a deep frown. “Why are you both looking at me like that?”
“I’m shocked, to be honest” Haru states, munching on another BBQ chip, shaking her head in disbelief. “Why didn’t you guys try and talk before deciding to call it quits? Did you even want to end things?”
Miwoo is silent for a moment, taking in Haru’s words without making eye contact with anyone, staring down at her lunch with a blank expression that starts to make you worry. You’re not used to seeing Miwoo so quiet, unless she passed out from being too drunk or too tired, so hearing nothing but silence from her rang the alarm bells in your head.
You want to know what’s going on inside her mind, what thoughts she’s thinking, what she’s feeling but you know deep down that she doesn’t want to open up… she doesn’t like opening up. You respect her wishes, always, but it’s hard seeing someone you truly care about suffer alone in silence.
So, instead, you reach over and pat her arm. She looks up, giving you her full attention with sullen eyes and you smile, pointing at her salad that she’s been playing with for the past few minutes.
“Can I have some more? It was really good” Miwoo starts to smile at your words and nods her head excitedly. Haru watches you both with a soft grin, happy to see Miwoo lighten up from her previous sour mood and you help keep the smile on her face, keeping her preoccupied.
She takes out her phone when it buzzes to see a message from Renjun, cheeks becoming sore from the grin that remains on her face. Tapping the little camera icon in the left hand corner, she raises the phone up, making sure that the three of you are in frame when she calls out your names.
You both turn to face her, Miwoo throwing a middle finger to the camera with one hand while the other feeds you. Your eyes are wide, a fork hanging from your mouth but you give the camera a peace sign, ignoring the way Haru snickers as she takes the photo.
“Was that Renjun?” Miwoo asks, even though she knows the answer. Haru nods. “Are they meeting us out here?”
“He said he’s going to be a few minutes late” Haru says, thumbs quickly tapping against the keyboard on the screen before she swipes to the side, pulling up the groupchat. Her brows furrow as she reads the recent messages. “Yangyang and Donghyuck are on their way, Shotaro is staying behind and there’s nothing from Jeno or Jaemin”
“I saw Jeno earlier” You pipe up, biting into your sandwich as you side glance at Miwoo who hardly pays attention, staring down at her blood red coloured nails. “He was with that guy that hangs out in his class… Kim J?”
“Kim Jungwoo” Miwoo grabs her water from her bag, unscrewing the cap as she looks up at the two of you. “Whitish hair, tall, body like a greek god. He’s dating that girl that's studying economics: Nabi”
“Nabi?” You repeat. “Like the butterfly?”
“Yep” Miwoo nods, shoving a forkful of salad into her mouth and chewing quickly. She swallows but still covers her mouth to speak. “She’s super pretty but I don’t really like her attitude that much. She seems full of herself, thinks she’s better than everyone… which is weird because her little sister is the exact opposite, she’s cool”
“Who’s her sister?”
“Her name is—” Miwoo pauses, staring over your head with a look of disbelief before she starts laughing, shaking her head with her tongue poking at her cheek. “You’ve got to be kidding me”
Confusion is written all over your face but when you turn to look over your shoulder, you understand why she had that reaction. You see Eunbin walking across campus with Mia and Yeeun at her side, laughing at what Mia was saying. Your nail nervously scratches at your thumb as you watch her, heart thumping erratically in your chest at the way she carries herself. So confident. So pretty.
It’s like a bright light shines around her form, sparkles twinkling whenever she smiles, her laugh sounding like musical notes. Her beauty continues to make you speechless, struggling to comprehend how someone can be so perfect.
Your eyes widen comically as you notice she’s making her way over to your little group, waving happily when she sees you and you awkwardly wave back, a tight smile stuck on your face.
“She’s friends with Mia and Yeeun?” Haru questions, raising her brow at the trio.
“Told you… she’s strange” Miwoo says as they get closer, giving them one of her most famous fake smiles, tilting her head to the side as they stand in front of you both. Eunbin’s the only one to greet you three, the others remaining quiet and staring with a look in their eye that you fail to pinpoint but you ignore them, paying attention to Eunbin who calls out your name softly
“It’s great seeing you again” Eunbin says with a genuine tone that makes your stomach churn. “I’m sorry if I made you awkward or uncomfortable yesterday… I didn’t realise how tense the situation was until you left yesterday”
“It’s fine” You lie, shaking your head. “It was probably weird for the both of us”
“Very” Eunbin chuckles before she speaks again, but you struggle to focus on her words when you see Mia staring at you from behind her shoulder, smirking. She’s finding this whole situation hilarious and it makes your blood bubble.
Jaemin and Eunbin never ended on bad terms, he’ll throw you away when she comes back. Mia’s voice repeats in your head again but you know the beginning part is wrong, he told you the truth… He’ll throw you away when she comes back. You tear your eyes away from Mia to stare at nothing in particular, biting down on the skin of your cheek. Would the last part be true?
Wait. Does it even matter if Jaemin goes back to Eunbin? You brows furrow in deep thought. There’s no reason for you to be upset or even mad if Jaemin decides to go back to Eunbin… So why are you so against it? Why does the thought of it make your head hurt?
“So, yeah, I hope that we can be friends” Eunbin’s voice yanks you out of your thoughts and you blink rapidly, feeling hot underneath everyone’s stare as you realise you weren’t exactly listening to what she was saying, but you nod anyway which earns a grin. “Good! I’m glad! I should get going, I’m not supposed to be h—”
“Hold on, why are you here?” Miwoo interrogates this time, crossing her arms over her chest as she remains in harsh contact with Eunbin, her brow raised in suspicion. Miwoo’s challenging her, making her feel uncomfortable and uneasy, something she likes to do whenever she doesn’t like someone. Haru bites back an amused smile while you stay still. You can hear Yeeun scoff behind Eunbin.
“I came to get my old stuff from my class. I used to go here before I left” Eunbin explains with that sweet smile, not faltering under Miwoo’s eyes. She adjusts the bag strap on her shoulder as she turns to face Haru. “Actually, I did message Renjun on insta to see if he could pick it up for me… but I don’t think he saw it”
Unsurprisingly, Haru doesn’t react, remaining calm and collected as ever as she opens her packet of twizzlers, chewing on the red licorice nonchalantly while Miwoo’s eyebrows furrow at that, cocking her head to the side with her tongue poking at her cheek. Fuck, she’s getting angry. You stretch your legs and nudge her foot with yours discreetly, giving her a look that she doesn’t even take notice of as she keeps her gaze locked on Eunbin.
She speaks slowly. “You messaged Renjun?”
“Well, yeah, we were in the same art class” Eunbin explains further, holding up her hands in defence. “I just want my stuff, that’s all”
“Then go get it” The tone Miwoo uses surprises you all and Eunbin nods slowly, giving you and Haru a short smile for a goodbye before she walks away, Yeeun and Mia following close behind but not before sneering at Miwoo who flips them off, uninteresting in the pair as she turns to face Haru who watches the chaos quietly, still chewing on her twizzler. “Dude, she messaged your fucking boyfriend, how are you not livid right now?”
“I’m not worried” Haru shrugs her shoulders. “Renjun hates her as much as the others do. Besides, he showed me the message earlier on his phone, he deleted it”
“I don’t like her, at all” Miwoo turns her head in the direction they left in, face scrunching in disgust. “And the fact that she’s friends with Mia and Yeeun… It just screams ‘red flag’”
“What does?” The three of you turn your head at the sound of Donghyuck’s voice, seeing him and Yangyang standing above you with curious expressions on their faces.
“Nice of you to finally show up” Miwoo huffs angrily, despite making space for the pair to sit down in the circle. “Eunbin just made an appearance”
“Really?” Yangyang pulls a face, sitting down beside you and knocking against your shoulder in the process. You wince at the harsh contact, rubbing the sore area as you kick him in return and he yelps, pushing you in retaliation. You’re about to fight back harder, raising your hand to wallop the back of his head until you notice Jeno and Jaemin walking out of the building, heading straight to your little group.
Miwoo explains in depth to Yangyang and Donghyuck about Eunbin, cursing multiple profanities and over exaggerating parts of the story that has Donghyuck gasping in shock. Your eyes remain on Jaemin whose eyes are already on you even though he speaks to Jeno, a grin spreading across his lips and you mirror his expression, raising your hand in a shy wave.
Yangyang follows your stare in wonder only for his shoulders to slump once he sees Jaemin, taking this opportunity to shuffle to the side, using his arms to move himself over to Donghyuck and Miwoo, creating a distance between you and him, a space he knows that Jaemin will sit.
Yangyang looks away when Jaemin does settle down beside you with a hand resting on your knee, his heart squeezing painfully in his chest.
You sprawl across your couch, legs stretching over Jaemin’s lap as your laptop rests on your stomach, engrossed in the work that should’ve been completed in the library earlier, but you’re thankful that Professor Moon is laid back and chill when it comes to your class, allowing you to have extra time if needed.
Your eyes flit over to Jaemin, watching as he stares at his editing tablet on the armrest while his hand rubs your thigh in soothing motions, gripping the skin between his fingers every now and then before mindlessly tracing little patterns, making goosebumps rise in his path.
Jaemin sighs softly, putting down his stylus pen to adjust the glasses that rest on his nose and rubs his forehead, resuming back in his editing and englaring the photograph he previously took of Shotaro to smooth out the edges and you peer over your laptop to see the stressed out look plastered across his face.
Your lips purse together in thought, removing the laptop from your lap and placing it down on the ground. You capture his attention just as you move around on the sofa, watching as you shift onto your knees, resting your bottom on the heels of your feet. His lips twitch upwards into a smile, finding you all too cute looking at him the way you are. He shuts off his tablet, carefully placing it down on the coffee table in front of him, giving you his full attention.
You both look at each other for a while in complete quiet. It was so natural to do so. No awkwardness, no uncomfortableness, it was just peace. This would be a good idea to tell him about the trip. That little voice in your head speaks and you struggle to swallow, eyes faltering from him. Tell him.
“Let’s take a break, hm?” You suggest and Jaemin nods slowly, agreeing. You clear your throat. “Also, I want to tell you something”
His brow quirks up. “Okay?”
“Okay” You repeat, sucking in a deep breath, palms becoming sweaty. Tell him. “There’s this trip that my, uh, my professor told me about not so long ago. It’s for aspiring writers, especially travel writers, which has been a huge dream of mine. It’s a pretty big trip, you know, and you get to travel around the world for a few months, writing about the places that you visit… And I got offered to go on that trip”
Jaemin’s silent. He’s staring at you. He’s staring through you. There’s no expression on his face, his smile gone. Your heart rate spikes up, you find it hard to breathe. Your vision is fuzzy and your fingers pinch the skin of your thigh to try and calm yourself down from the anxiety attack you’re about to have, from the thoughts that circle around in your head.
But, he smiles. He genuinely smiles.
You’re too frozen in shock to comprehend him leaning towards you, his hand fondly rubbing the back of your head before trailing down your back, pressing you against him. You fall into his side, unable to tear your eyes away from him as he tilts his head.
“I’m so proud of you” Jaemin says and your chest immediately bursts, feeling like little sparkes are prickling your skin and a weight is lifted off of your shoulders. You immediately relax, letting out a deep exhale of relief as you feel his fingers gently tug at your earrings affectionately. “I’m really proud of you”
“You are?” You ask and Jaemin nods, chuckling at the expression on your face. You let out a groan, slapping the palm of your hand against your forehead. “That was—oh my god—I’m such a—that was so—”
“You’re rambling” He cuts you off, amused.
“That was so anti-climatic” You tell him, shaking your head as your hand falls to his lap. “I was expecting some big negative reaction but… wow, that was so easy? Why was it that easy?” You eye him suspiciously. “Do you have something to tell me?”
“What? No” Jaemin laughs, letting his arm rest around your shoulders. “I’m genuinely proud of you… did you think I wouldn’t be proud of you?”
“It’s not that” You shake your head. “I just… I thought that you’d be upset or angry that I’d be leaving for a few months if I go on the trip. I thought it might, you know, bring back bad memories…”
“Oh…” Jaemin hums, pressing his lips together in deep thought. “This isn’t like that, though” You blink at that, unsure of what he means. “Eunbin didn’t tell me about her trip. She left without saying anything so I was clueless. You told me about the trip, you’re letting me know things… I mean, I’d be pretty angry and upset if you did what she did and kept it from me”
You laugh awkwardly. “I’m glad I didn’t decide to go with that then”
He gives you a deadpan expression. “You were going to keep it from me”
“Not exactly!!” You shake your head, quick to defend yourself even though that was the case. “I was scared about telling you. I didn’t know how to tell you—I didn't know how you would react!! I thought the others would—”
“The others know?” He cuts you off, his mouth dropping open in mock offence and you roll your eyes as you realise he’s been joking around with you this entire time and that he’s not actually upset. You go to speak but he beats you to it. “Oh, you’re evil”
Now it’s your turn to be offended. “I’m not”
“You are” He nods rapidly. “You’re evil. You told everyone but me”
“Actually, they found out. I didn’t tell anyone” You mutter under your breath through gritted teeth and Jaemin laughs, leaning forwards to press his lips against your temple in a short peck. You raise your head at that which makes him come forwards again, capturing your lips with his.
You hand cups his jaw, bringing him to you as close as possible, stomach swirling with excitement as you feel him smile against your lips. His tongue mindlessly plays with yours and you’re desperate, you’re so fucking desperate to climb onto his lap and makeout with him all even until you feel him pull away.
You whine, chasing his lips but he tuts with a shake of his head.
“You were mean to me” Jaemin whispers, his nose brushing against yours and you notice the way his mouth quirks up in a sly grin. This isn’t going to be good. “You could make it up to me?” You give him a blank look, crossing your arms over your chest as you nod for him to continue. “Give me a blowjob?”
You snort. “Pig”
Jaemin frowns. “Handjob then?”
“You want me to give you a handjob? Right here? In my living room?” You giggle, gesturing towards the door with a quick nod of your head. “Where anyone can walk in and see us?”
Jaemin hums with a slow nod, tongue darting out to lick his lips as he stares at you with a smirk. Your thighs clench together at his expression, excitement pooling in the pit of your stomach. He leans his head closer to yours. “Doesn’t the thought of getting caught sound fun?”
You tut even though a smile spreads across your lips, crawling your fingers up his leg and stroking his thigh over his sweatpants. The smirk falters from his face, bottom lip caught between his teeth as he watches your hand cup his boner, instinctively pushing his hips up into your palm. Undoing the strings on his sweatpants, you slip your hand beneath the waistband, eyebrows raising in surprise as you realise he’s wearing no boxers.
He gives you a sly wink to which you roll your eyes at, drawing his length out of his sweatpants and wrapping your fingers around him, thumb rubbing along the underside, watching as he grows bigger. Jaemin shifts beside you, sighing at the way you touch him, head lolling to the side.
Once you start jerking him off at a slow pace, his head drops to your shoulder, watching your hand work him. He’s in awe at how perfect your hand wraps around him. Made just for me. He hums as your fingertip spreads the precum that leaks from his slit and he jolts when you smear it around his sensitive tip, a breathy moan falling from his lips.
You pump his cock with long, languid strokes and Jaemin parts his lips to groan, pupils dilated and filled with lust, brows contorting in pleasure. He can’t control himself, lightly rolling his hips upwards to meet your pace but he shudders as your thumb presses down on his leaking slit in warning to not move or change the pace.
You tut. “You’re so nee—”
“Don’t” He breathes out heavily, broken moans ripping through his throat as you stroke his cock faster, leaning over to drool over his tip. The wet sounds of your hand twisting over his cock sends an ache to your core, desperate to be touched. You squeeze your thighs together for some friction, your own breathing labouring.
A guttural groan leaves him, head flinging back against the sofa, mouth open wide as he pants. He’s losing it. He feels like he’s going crazy. The way you’re looking at him, the way your hand moves against him, the dirty wet sounds. Fuck, he’s going to cum soon. Jaemin’s grunts, trying to control himself and not focus too much on your hand rubbing his sensitive head. He doesn’t want this to end. Please. Please Plea—
“Fuuuuck” A grunt rips from the back of his throat, biting down harshly on his bottom lip as he screws his eyes shut, body stilling just before cums. It shoots out in long strings, coating your hand and his t-shirt, and your eyes widen in shock to see how much he’s giving you, your hand refusing to stop its ministrions on his spent cock.
You laugh at his weak attempts at pushing your hand away, grinning at the way he whines at the overstimulation and you finally let go, watching as he flops back against the sofa, chest heaving as he sucks in deep breaths.
“Am I forgiven?” You ask, voice quiet and soft. His head turns to look at you, eyes filled with adoration and affection. Your brows furrow at the hazy look he’s giving you, wondering what’s going on inside of his head and your cheeks warm at the attention, wanting to break eye contact out of shyness but you can’t seem to do so. You feel stuck, you feel hot… you feel—
You’re snatched out of your thoughts when Jaemin lurches forward to kiss you, knocking the air out of your lungs. Your fingers curl at the front of his shirt, drawing your bodies as close together as you can with the help of his hands on your waist that help you onto his lap, throwing your leg over his hips.
You’ve been sex deprived for so long that you already feel the pool of slick between your thighs, underwear uncomfortably sticking to your folds and you pull away from Jaemin’s lips to get rid of your leggings, laughing at Jaemin’s failed attempts to help you, eager to get you out of your clothes.
He flings your leggings somewhere behind you, the two of you not caring where they land as he reconnects your lips in a messy kiss, a clash of teeth and tongue. He nips down your jaw and finds interest in your neck as his fingers hook in the waistband of your panties, ready to rip them off of your body and have at you but the sound of his phone buzzing captures your attention, craning your neck to see the culprit.
You freeze on top of him, seeing Eunbin’s name flash across his screen. Why is she calling him? His phone stops buzzing for a few moments and you allow yourself to get lost in his kisses again but his phone lights back up, her name appearing on the screen.
“What’s wrong?” Jaemin mumbles against the skin of your neck, pulling away with a pop as he realises you’re not speaking. He moves away from the marks created on your neck to look up at you, moving fallen hair out of your face before following your line of sight, his hands slowly dropping from your face as he sees the caller ID.
“Ignore it” You say, almost pleading. You turn back to Jaemin to see his attention on the device. You grab at his face, angling him towards you to brush your lips against his. “Ignore it”
He kisses you again, tongue sliding against yours. Your fingers rake through his hair, gasping into the kiss as he tugs at your underwear again, hearing the seam rip a little at the force. You’re ready for him to tear the flimsy material off of your body and take you on the sofa, but it never comes, not when the phone buzzes again.
Jaemin’s the one to pull back this time, reaching for his phone on the arm rest. Eunbin’s name flashes across the screen and you sigh, your hands leaving his hair and falling into your lap. He stares at the screen for a few moments, tongue poking at his cheek in deep thought before he slides his finger across the bottom and raises the phone to his ear.
You blink, shocked that he answered the phone while you are both in a pretty serious position and instantly, you yearn for him withers away into nothing.
His brows furrow as he listens to Eunbin speak on the other side, something about wanting to talk, something about Jeno. Jaemin meets your eyes as he tells her he’s busy but you can faintly hear her pleas and you can feel yourself slowly get frustrated. Is it sexually? Are you just angry? You slide off of his lap the second you sense his demeanour change, adjusting your panties as you sit beside him in silence, chewing at your thumb nail.
Jaemin mutters a quiet goodbye and hangs up the phone, looking over at you with the most apologetic frown and your blood bubbles.
“Are you—are you serious right now?” You look at him in disbelief, sitting up straight as you turn your body towards him. “You’re leaving, aren’t you? Are you kidding?”
“Y/N…” Jaemin calls your name softly, tucking himself back into his sweats and you laugh, shaking your head in bewilderment. He puts the phone to the side and grabs your hand, trying to interlock your fingers with his own but you pull away, not allowing him to have what he wants. He sighs. “Don’t be like this. Please”
“How can I not?” You mutter, refusing to look at him, feeling embarrassed at your next words. “Jae, we haven’t had sex in days… it feels like everytime we try, we’re always interrupted and then when we finally get a chance to be alone…”
“Hey” Jaemin reaches towards you, cupping your face with his hands and forces you to look at him. “Whatever you’re thinking inside your head right now, stop it. You know that I’d choose to spend time with you over anyone in a heartbeat… I’m only leaving because I know Jeno will snap if she shows up at the house and I can’t be bothered to deal with the arguments. She just wants to talk again and I promise you, I’ll be right back”
You take in his words, nodding slowly. “What does she even want to talk about anyway?”
Jaemin shrugs his shoulders, his fingers delicately caressing your face. “I don’t know. I think she’s just trying to be friends again, you know, like we talked about before”
When you don’t respond, Jaemin shifts beside you, pulling you towards him to give you a kiss. It’s soft, slow, gentle. It makes your head spin and you feel giddy, a smile threatening to make its way onto your lips. The way he makes you shy and putty in his grip will always be a mystery to you, you never understood how easily he makes you weak.
He tilts his head to deepen the kiss, fingers moving from your cheeks to grab the back of your neck, his hold desperate and the second your hands go to grip his shoulders, you’re reminded of the kiss you shared at his front door yesterday morning when Eunbin was in the kitchen, you’re reminded of the talk they had yesterday and you’re reminded of the previous phone call.
The thought of Eunbin makes you move back from the kiss and Jaemin chases your lips, kissing you one last time before he stands from the sofa. You remain seated, watching him as he adjusts himself in his sweats and glances down at his cum stained shirt that he knows he’s going to have to hide and change as soon as he gets home.
He runs his hands through his messy hair as he leans down, planting a kiss on the top of your head and you give him a tight smile, watching as he walks towards the front door.
You haven’t seen Jaemin fully in three days, his life being completely taken over by classes and hanging out with Eunbin who seemed to not want to leave his side, according to the majority of your group. He makes the effort to see you, even if it's passing through the corridors on campus, at lunch or even if it's a quick facetime call to see how you’re doing, sometimes he even has a few minutes to help you get off over the phone. But still, it’s not the real thing.
You miss him, but you were unsure if you miss the sex or if you miss his company. It could be both, you think. Let it be both.
Your days have been spent mostly with the group, Jeno, Donghyuck Yangyang never failing to leave your side, even coming over uninvited (not that they needed an invitation to come over anyways). You begin to notice that Jeno comes around when Eunbin’s at their house, refusing to be anywhere near her whenever she appears which, truth be told, you find amusing, secretly wanting to know the lengths Jeno would go to not be around her.
Even with Miwoo here at the apartment, they hardly acknowledge each other much. Just a simple look before one of them turns away. You feel bad for the both of them… but you also wants to smack them across their heads for being so idiotic and not talking to each other.
“Honey, we’re home!” Donghyuck’s voice sings as soon as the apartment door unlocks, kicking off his shoes at the door and rushing inside while Jeno and Yangyang linger behind, taking off their shoes and coats.
Originally, you were going to spend the day alone due to Haru being at work with Renjun tagging along and Miwoo taking Shotaro shopping, and knowing that those two shopaholics wouldn’t be back for a good few hours, you decided to have a you day; your favourite food, your favourite alcoholic drink and your favourite movie while possibly feeling sorry for yourself.
But the entire idea is flushed down the drain as soon as the trio enter your apartment, yet you’re grateful. You really didn’t want to be alone.
“Hi” You greet them happily as they walk into the kitchen. Donghyuck immediately darts for the refrigerator, pushing the hood down on top of head and drums his fingers across the open door, staring at the goods inside with a pout. Jeno sits down at the island, adorned in a pair of black gym shorts and a white hoodie, bangs messily splayed across his forehead. His fingers play with the little tuft of hair at the back of his neck, the mullet growing in nicely.
Yangyang, on the other hand, is wearing something less comfy and casual. Your brows pull together as you eye the black balenciaga sweatshirt he’s wearing with his baggy denim jeans and black converses.
He senses your staring and presses his palms against the marble counter to lean on them, popping out his ass. “What? Do I look sexy?”
“You wish” You scoff, sitting down opposite Jeno who’s chuckling. Yangyang flips you off as he sits down beside him and Donghyuck soon joins you with a yoghurt cup in hand. You point to it. “That’s mine”
“Oh” Donghyuck sounds defeated even though he rips off the plaster lid and dips a spoon inside. He blinks at you before he smiles. “Mine now”
You huff. “All you losers do is come to my apartment and eat my food!”
“Correction, we come to your apartment and eat your food with you so you’re not alone” Yangyang grins, resting his chin on his hand as he looks at you. “Who’s the loser really?”
“Still you” You grumble, leaning back into your seat with your arms wrapped around your middle. “Way to put me down, by the way. Mentioning that I’m alone here.. Thanks for that”
Yangyang sends an air kiss your way and a wink. “You’re welcome, sweetheart”
“Has he not talked to you today?” Jeno asks you as he fishes his phone out of his pocket and you nod your head, informing him on your brief interaction you had with Jaemin this morning on campus. Jeno doesn’t seem too impressed with your answer. “Really? That’s it?”
“He’s been busy” You shrug your shoulders, unable to look them in their eyes as they all stare at you. They know you’re making excuses. You know you’re making excuses. “Is Eunbin there?”
“No, thank god” Donghyuck answers this time, shoving a spoonful of yoghurt in his mouth. “I can’t take another second of her trying to talk to us and act like everything is okay. I’m tired of hearing her voice”
“Aren’t you, I don’t know, annoyed?” Yangyang queries, looking at you with concerned filled eyes. “I mean… his ex-girlfriend is trying to spend time with him while you’re here, alone at home”
“I don’t have a reason to be annoyed” You shrug your shoulders again, not knowing what else to do. “What Jaemin does is none of my concern… and neither is Eunbin for that matter. They can do whatever they want”
“But you guys are official” Donghyuck points out, putting the empty yoghurt cup to the side and licking the spoon clean. “You’re allowed to be annoyed, right?”
“I think I can only be annoyed if he ends up sleeping with her” You mumble under your breath. Suddenly, you’re filling with dread. Would he sleep with Eunbin again even after everything they’ve been through? Would he ever sleep with her? The thought makes you feel sick and you rub at your forehead, trying to get rid of the images of the pair inside of your head.
Jeno knocks his foot against yours beneath the table. “Jaemin wouldn’t sleep with Eunbin” His eyes darts to Donghyuck as he speaks, giving him a hardened glare which has Donghyuck shrinking in his seat with a sulk. “Jaemin wouldn’t do that, not after the shit she put him through…”
You frown. “That bad, huh?”
“He was depressed for a long time. All he would do was cry, drink, take drugs, feel shittier and repeat” Jeno sighs as he recalls the moments of his best friend in pain, chewing at his cheek. “It was a constant cycle that he couldn’t get out of. There was a short period where he wanted to sleep around with people, to forget the pain, to feel something different… but he couldn’t do it. He kept seeing her in his mind, it made him feel worse”
The way Jeno explains Jaemin’s post breakup, it reminded you of yourself. You were reminded about how shitty you felt, how disgusting and lonely you were, how alcohol was your coping mechanism and how badly you wanted to feel something different… just like how Jaemin did. You frown at that, heart dropping into your stomach at the thought of him so upset.
“Which is why we were kinda surprised when we found out he was sleeping with you” Yangyang tells you, awkwardly fiddling with the ring on his thumb as he refuses to meet your eyes. “We didn’t expect him to get into this type of situation with someone… It’s the same for you too, we didn’t expect you to do it”
“So, little lady, are you going to tell me what’s actually going on in that little head of yours?” You hiss as Jeno knocks his knuckle against your head, rubbing the sore area as he drops down beside you on the sofa.
Your eyes flitter over to Yangyang and Donghyuck, the pair dead asleep on the loveseat, limbs sprawled across each other with their mouths hanging open, light snoring sounds coming from them both. Empty beer bottles and takeout bags are scattered on the floor around them, it makes you snicker at the sight and you pull out your phone to take a picture, completely forgetting Jeno’s previous question.
Jeno seems to have forgotten his own question too as he peers over your shoulder at the photo, watching as you draw around their bodies in the snapchat app with funky coloured lines and Jeno reaches his arm around to draw devil horns on top of Donghyuck’s head while you add black love hearts around Yangyang.
You post the picture on your private snap before saving the photo and posting it in the groupchat, already receiving quick messages and reactions from the others who find the picture funny just as much as you two do.
“I’m fine” You finally answer him, putting your phone down and bringing your knees up to your chest comfortably. Jeno gives you a look, clearly not believing a word you say and you put your hands up. “I’m serious! I’m fine”
He purses his lips in deep thought. “Would it make you talk if I told you that I wasn’t fine?”
Your hands instantly drop to your sides. “What’s wrong?”
“Nuh-uh, you first”
“You’re unbelievable” You sigh, shaking your head. “Fine, okay, I’ll tell you” Jeno grins happily, shifting around in his spot to get comfortable. “Since Eunbin has come back into the picture, I’ve been feeling very… I don’t know, replaceable, maybe? Is that even the right word?” The grin slowly drops from Jeno’s face as he listens to you speak, expression becoming stone cold at the mention of Eunbin’s name. “Even though Jaemin has been reassuring me, in his own little way, I’m still on the edge with a lot of things… I feel like something bad is going to happen, it’s making me uneasy”
“You make Jaemin happy” Your heart thumps at that. “You make him really happy. He’s so comfortable around you, you know, I haven’t seen him like this in a long time. Eunbin is doing her Eunbin thing… I see her as a leech, she latches onto things and she doesn’t let go. Jaemin has always been her target since they first met, she was obsessed with him and Jaemin became obsessed with her”
“Are you saying this stuff because it’s true or because you don’t like her?”
Jeno chuckles, leaning his head back against the sofa cushions as he looks at you. “Both”
You roll your eyes, shaking your head with a small smile. “Have you ever liked her?”
Jeno’s silent for a moment, deep in thought. Has there been a time where he liked Eunbin? He remembered when he first met her, when Jaemin first pointed her out in the art store she worked at. She was quiet but confident, which Jeno found interesting, and he liked how artistic she was, it reminded him of Renjun. Eunbin fought hard for what she wanted, which Jeno respected a lot… but she was selfish.
He wasn’t fully sure if she even meant to do it, but she wanted Jaemin for herself. She took up most of his time, pulling Jaemin away from him and the rest of the boys. He felt like she invaded Jaemin’s personal space, his too.
She was everywhere Jaemin would be and Jeno hated it. Was he jealous? Of course, he hardly got to spend time with his best friend who lived with him. Was he angry? Of course, Jaemin became too fixated on his relationship to even think about anything else… But Jeno always respected Jaemin, so he pushed all his emotions and feelings about Eunbin to the side when he saw how truly happy Jaemin was.
His mood turns sour when he's reminded of the breakup, remembering seeing Jaemin’s face, so broken and red raw from the tears that streamed down his cheeks. He let Jaemin cry into his arms, holding him tight and consoling him as Jaemin made excuses for Eunbin’s departure. I wasn’t good enough for her. I didn’t do enough. Am I a bad person? What did I do to deserve this? Jaemin’s fragile voice repeats through his head and Jeno sighs, tucking his bottom lip between his teeth.
you: do u want to come over???
you: i was thinking maybe we could watch a movie or something???
you: i’ll cook dinner later :)
jaemin: i can’t rn baby i’m busy
you: oh
jaemin: can u come over later?
[read 1:01pm]
You shut off your phone, shaking your head as you carelessly throw it to the side, not caring about the noise it makes as it lands on the kitchen island. Your fingers grip the roots of your hair, lips pressing together in a straight line as you exhale deeply through your nose.
It’s now been a week since you last hung out with Jaemin in person, the two of you having to cancel plans due to your assignments and schedules getting too hectic or, in Jaemin’s case, always being too busy to do something.
Deep down, you knew that his big photography projects were nearing their deadlines and he had to get them done… but there was always that little voice in the back of your mind that told you he was deliberately ignoring you, that he actually wasn’t busy and that he didn’t want to spend time with you anymore… that he’s back with Eunbin.
Your head falls into your hands as you sigh. Eunbin’s name makes you feel sad. The thought of Eunbin alone makes you feel like your throat is tight and you’re about to lose breath, but the thought of Jaemin being with Eunbin makes you feel like you’re going to lose your mind. It makes your chest feel painful and your eyes burn, almost like you’re holding back the tears but why would you need to cry? You have no reason… or maybe you do.
No you don’t, you tell yourself. You push back any thoughts and feelings about the situation, taking a sip of your water at your side before deciding to work on your assignments to keep yourself busy, not wanting to think about anything regarding the pair.
It doesn’t take long for Haru to join you, strolling into the kitchen with her arms full of notebooks and papers. You pull out the chair beside you for her to sit down and she huffs, dropping her stuff down on the island as she flops down in her chair.
“I’m so ready for these assignments to be over” Haru tells you, ripping the scrunchie off of her wrist and gathering her hair on top of her head to keep it out of her eyes, ignoring the little strands of hair that frame around her face.
“Me too” You mutter, eyeing the striped yellow and brown long sleeved shirt that’s covering her body, noticing the little specks of paint on the sleeves. “Is Renjun here?”
“He was” Haru nods, quickly pushing herself up from her seat to walk over to the miniature espresso machine to make herself a mug of coffee. “He left a little while ago. He asked Shotaro if he can paint him while he dances”
“That’s sweet” You say, leaning your elbows on the island. “Miwoo’s still sleeping”
“Speaking off Miwoo…” Haru begins, sitting back down beside you and taking a sip of her coffee. She pulls out her phone out of her shorts, fingers tapping quickly against the screen. You watch curiously, seeing her pull up Miwoo’s instagram and tap the first photo that she posted a week ago in her new gorgeous black dress that you’re obsessed with, she looked so pretty.
Haru faces the phone towards you, telling you to read the comments after your own. You do as she says, reading through the comments with a smile, loving the appreciation and the compliments she’s getting until you focus on the most recent one. Your eyes go wide, taking the phone out of Haru’s hands to get a better look, making sure you wasn’t reading anything wrong.
sunwo.o pretty
You gape, glancing back up at Haru in shock before looking back at the phone. Haru nods, silently confirming that it is actually Sunwoo’s account, that he did comment the compliment under her photo.
“Are they friends?” You ask as you tap on Sunwoo’s account and go through his photos and comments to see if Miwoo was active in them. You spot a few likes on his recents but no comments. You hand the phone back to Haru. “Do you think they’re talking?”
“I have no idea” Haru shrugs her shoulders. “Maybe he knows about the breakup between her and Jeno? Could be trying to get into her pants or something?”
“Sunwoo likes sleeping around but he’s pretty picky about who he sleeps with” You inform her. During your relationship with Eric, you got super close with Sunwoo too. He told you everything, he found a safe place in you and didn’t hold back from telling you things that sometimes you didn’t really want to know or found concerning. He liked sleeping with people who didn’t know him and vice versa. All he gave them was his age and his consent, nothing more, nothing less. “Plus, he used to be friends with Jeno too and he respected him so I doubt he would sleep with Miwoo…”
“Sunwoo now might be different from Sunwoo then” Haru points out and you hum, knowing that it could possibly be true. “How are you and Jaemin?”
You freeze at the name, staring down at your notes. You’re unsure how to answer that. Did you even want to answer it? Your lips press together and you give her a short nod, indicating that you’re both good as you decide now’s the time to get back to your assignments, not sparing her a glance.
Haru doesn’t believe you, not one bit. She senses something is off and her brows furrow, concerned and worried. She contemplates on asking you again, on demanding a full answer out of you but she knows how stubborn you can get sometimes, especially when you don’t want to talk about something.
She’s aware Jaemin hasn’t been around as much and she secretly hopes it's for a good reason, but she has a feeling it’s not. Haru see’s how different you and Jaemin both have been acting since Eunbin came back from New York and despite not fully knowing Eunbin, she feels a little bit of hatred towards her, knowing that she’s upsetting you.
You both remain quiet as you work, only sharing a few mutters back and forth when you’re stuck on a certain word or in need of some advice. You write, you ask for some help, you refill your drinks and repeat.
Haru finishes way before you but still decides to keep you company, remaining silent at your side and drinking her coffee as she scrolls through her phone. You ask for help again but when she doesn’t answer, you lift your head to look at her, noticing how engrossed she is with something on her phone and you don’t really think much of it as you go back to your writing, filling in what you think is right.
She quietly calls out your name just as you finish your paragraph and you hum, glancing up from your papers to give her your attention. Your lips curl into a frown as you notice the confusion and hesitancy on her face and it’s you that calls out Haru’s name this time, scrunching your brows together as she looks between you and her phone repeatedly.
“Have you…” Haru pauses, tilting her head to the side as she blinks. “Have you seen Eunbin’s post on instagram?”
“No” You shake your head, leaning back into your seat. “I don’t follow her”
Haru finally rests her eyes on you. “I think you should look at it”
Your hands move faster than you can blink, reaching across the island to retrieve your phone and hurrying to the instagram app in record speed to type in Eunbin’s username that Haru reads out loud to you. You bring up her page, teeth gnawing into your bottom lip nervously as you wait for it to load in, not realising your hands are starting to shake.
The page loads and your mouth instantly dries as a familiar person appears on her recent post.
You tap the photo, unable to form a proper sentence as you take in all it’s details. It's Jaemin, you know it’s Jaemin. You know Jaemin like that back of your hand. He’s holding his camera, those are his hands and his rings… that’s him. His hair is no longer it’s perfect black that you liked, it’s blonde. The caption: “still my favourite person” throws you off more than the time it was posted, which was an hour ago. He was spending time with her… that’s why he was busy.
You’re not sure what kind of mixed emotions washes through you but you hate it, it makes you feel uncomfortable and you fear you’re about to throw up, immediately shutting off your phone and placing it down on the side as you go back to your papers without another look or word.
Haru stares at you, the frown on her face deepening at your odd behaviour but she knows how much you’re affected by what you just saw despite being quiet. She hurts for you to the point she decides to get up from her seat and stand beside you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and you furrow your brows at her touch, giving her a confused look which she responds with a soft and gentle smile.
“What are you doing?”
“Hugging you” She answers simply as she pulls you closer to her chest, her hand delicately caressing the back of your head, her touch so comforting and warm. “Is that a problem?”
“No” You speak softly, fighting back a smile as you melt into her embrace. “Can I ask why you’re hugging me though?”
“It just looks like you need it” Haru shrugs, moving her hand from your hair to rub your back as she glances down at your phone, chewing the inside of her cheek in thought. “You know you can tell me anything, right? I’m here for you and if something, anything, is on your mind I’m happy to help with whatever is”
“I know” Your voice cracks. You’re doomed. Your eyes start to sting. “I don’t even know what’s on my mind right now, Haru… It’s just a mixture of things and I’m struggling to find the real one, you know?”
“I hope you don’t mind me saying this but, it’s obviously jealousy and hurt towards Jaemin and Eunbin for starters” Haru tells you and you go to disagree until she shakes her head, motioning for you to stop. “Come on, Y/N… it’s completely normal to feel like this, especially in this situat—”
“I’m not supposed to feel jealous” You cut her off, ripping yourself away from the hug to face her completely. Your eyes water. “What we have is just sex, okay? We got into this friends with benefits type of relationship because we missed sex. We told each other that we wouldn’t fall for each other or claim ourselves as boyfriend and girlfriend—We made rules!! I can’t, Haru… I can’t feel jealous”
“It’s hard to control your own feelings and your own emotions” Haru tells you with a soft tone. “It’s okay”
“It’s not okay—”
“Why?”
The tear slips from your eye and down your cheek, dripping onto your papers. “Because I think I like Jaemin”
The walls that you’ve built up, the real feelings that you locked away in the back of your mind, the emotions that you’ve held in for so long, it all crumbles. The weight on your chest withers away and you can finally breathe again after struggling, gasping for air. Your hand slaps against your mouth, the sobs that rip from the back of your throat are loud, the tears stream uncontrollably down your cheeks and you’re unable to control your erratic breathing. You feel free.
Haru looks at you in pure shock as you break down and she flings her arms around you, allowing you to sob into her chest. Your fingers grip her shirt, surely staining the material with your salty tears but she doesn’t seem to care. She kisses the crown of your head, cooing and whispering sweet words: you’re going to be okay, it’s okay, let it out.
You like Jaemin, you like him a lot. You started liking him the day of Eric’s party when he showed up at the apartment all ready to go but dropped everything to stay with you, when he told you that if you’re feeling low or if you feel like you’re going to lose yourself to your bad thoughts, you got him. You’ll always have him.
Parting from Haru’s embrace, you sniffle as you wipe under your eyes. Haru is sweet enough to help you, pushing your hair out of your face and using the sleeve of her shirt to wipe at your cheeks. You let out a shaky breath, looking up at Haru and giving her your best smile which she coos at, affectionately pinching your cheeks.
“I’m proud of you, you know” She tells you, moving to sit back down beside you. “It takes a lot of guts to admit something like that, it must’ve been hard”
You shrug your shoulders and adjust yourself in your seat, bringing your knees up to your chest. Your cheeks feel warm at her praise but you don’t say anything, opting to rest your chin on the tops of your knees as you look at nothing in particular, mind filling with thoughts about Jaemin.
You’re shocked at yourself for revealing your true feelings and you’re unsure on where to go from here. You broke one of the biggest rules that you and Jaemin listed. Rule number three: no feelings, no falling in love, no getting jealous. You mentally crossed the rule out in your mind, teeth gnawing at your cheek as you realise you did all of them.
You want to knock some sense into yourself, to scream at yourself how wrong you are for breaking the rules. You’re embarrassed, you feel stupid. It’s one-sided, you think, and that’s the most pathetic.
“I think you should talk with Jaemin”
Your eyes flick towards Haru. “You’re kidding… I can’t do that”
“Why not?” She furrows her brows. “It’s better than to keep this all to yourself. You need to tell him how you feel before you get stuck down a rabbit hole”
You laugh at that. “I think I’m already stuck. There’s no way I can just outright tell him that I like him… do you realise how embarrassing that is? I’ll get laughed at, I’ll look like a fool—”
“You’ve known Jaemin for, what, almost three months? Do you really think he’d be the type to laugh at you?” Haru questions you instantly, shaking her head. “You know Jaemin better than anyone… he’s not the type of person to laugh at you, especially when you’re being honest and talking about your feelings”
“It’s been three months already?” Your eyes are wide, mouth agape. You couldn’t wrap your head around it, there’s no way you’ve been friends with benefits for that long. It makes you feel dizzy.
“Well, it’s coming up to three months” Haru corrects herself. “Still, you should talk to him. Text him right now and ask if you can meet up”
You blink. “So suddenly?” You gulp at the thought. “Isn’t he with Eunbin right now?”
“Fuck Eunbin” Haru curses and your eyes bulge in surprise, not expecting those words or the tone she uses. “This isn’t about her. This is about you and Jaemin. Don’t ever let her get in between that… no matter what”
After your conversation with Haru, she left to go spend the rest of her day with Renjun while you sucked up the courage to go talk to Jaemin, to tell him how you truly felt. You sent him a quick text previously to let him know that you would be over soon but you still stand in the middle of your room, staring at the heaps of clothes on your bed as you nervously nibble the skin around your fingers.
You’re unsure why you even care about what you wear, knowing that Jaemin doesn’t really care about your appearance, not when you’ve been around him in an old ratted shirt and sweatpants. Why did you feel the need to impress him all of a sudden? You shake your head, rummaging through the pile of clothes, flinging some over your shoulder with a noise of dissatisfaction at the ones you thought weren’t suitable.
“What are you doing?” You hear a voice question behind you. You spin around, seeing Miwoo standing in your bedroom doorway, rubbing at her eyes. You frown as you drink in her appearance. There are bags under her eyes and her face is paler than usual, hair messily tied on top of her head.
“Just looking for clothes” You answer quietly, dropping the items in your hand as you straighten up, looking at her in concern. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine” Miwoo gives you her best smile, stepping further into your room. “Why are you looking for clothes? Are you going somewhere?”
“Jaemin’s” You eye her warily. “Have you been asleep this entire time?”
“Not really” Her answer is short, which isn’t like her, at all. You watch as she sits down on your bed, making herself comfy and staring down at the pile of clothes, touching the fabrics softly. Her lips jut out in a pout. “Will you be leaving soon?”
“I don’t know—What’s going on?” Your brows furrow together, your arms crossing over your chest as you kick the pile of clothes to the side and sit down beside her. She doesn’t answer your question, instead she stares ahead, eyes scanning around your room. The frown deepens on your face as you call out her name again. “Miwoo?”
“It’s nothing” Miwoo shakes her head but oddly, she continues. “It’s just you’ll be leaving soon, right? And Haru’s already gone… so, I’ll be here…” She scratches herself, feeling awkward as she mutters the last words. “...by myself”
You’re surprised at her honestly, and you really didn’t expect her to speak in such a way. You decided to press on. “And you don’t want to be here by yourself?”
“Not really” She repeats her answer from earlier, a lot quieter this time.
Miwoo keeps her attention on your carpet, fiddling with the jewellery on her fingers. She feels uncomfortable, being this honest with you. She doesn’t like the feeling it gives her, she feels too vulnerable, too exposed… but she can’t seem to stop admitting what she’s thinking or feeling, there’s something pushing against her, egging her to continue on but she remains silent again, waiting for you to say something which she hopes you will soon, the silence becoming a little too much.
You make a noise of understanding, nodding your head as you relax beside her. Your arms drop, hands placing in your lap as you pat a rhythm on your thighs. You can sense Miwoo feels awkward, which you hate, but you want her to keep talking about what’s going on inside her head.
“Have you spoken to Jeno?” Great work.
“Nope” Miwoo shakes her head. “He tried talking to me yesterday but I couldn’t do it. I didn’t want to argue, I wasn’t in the mood for it”
You hum. “Maybe an argument wasn't going to happen? It could’ve been a normal conversation”
Miwoo shrugs her shoulders. “I didn’t want to risk it”
“Miwoo…” A sigh leaves your lips and she looks at you, eyes big and round. She looks like a hurt innocent child that’s getting scolded and it aches your heart. The expression she wears on her face almost makes you want to tear up but you remain calm, reaching over to tuck the stray strands of hairs behind her ears. “Not every conversation is going to end in an argument, not if you and him promise to talk things out…”
“I guess” She mutters, letting out a soft sigh. “It’s whatever, it’s done”
“Do you want it to be done?”
The question makes Miwoo freeze. She’s unable to answer. She doesn’t know how to answer. Of course she doesn’t want to lose Jeno. Jeno has always been her number one, he’s been her person, he’s been the one that makes her shitty days calm… but he’s also the one that she has the most arguments with, that makes her feel like she’s going crazy.
She knows that she herself isn’t an angel. She knows that she definitely makes Jeno angry and says the wrong things, on purpose and on accident. We’re not good for each other, she thinks. It’s done.
Miwoo shrugs her shoulders again, not answering the question which makes you sigh again. You retract your hand from her face, letting it fall to your side. The side eye doesn’t go unnoticed but you don’t comment on it, allowing her to remain silent, waiting for her to be comfortable enough to speak up again.
“I…” She starts but immediately stops, her brows scrunching together in confusion.
“What?” You press. “What do you want to say?”
“I don’t.. I don’t really know” Miwoo mumbles as she leans back against your wall, bringing her knees up to her chest, chewing her bottom lip anxiously. “I guess…” She pulls a face, struggling to find the correct words to say while refusing to make any eye contact with you, keeping her attention focused on her nude coloured nails. “I guess I just… I feel alone, I think”
“Alone?”
“Yeah” Miwoo clears her throat. She holds her head up high this time and turns to you with one of the fakest smiles you’ve ever seen her wear. “But that’s why I’m here, that’s why I came to you… because you don’t make me feel that way”
You immediately reach over to wrap your arms around her and she yelps in surprise at your sudden movement but is quick to hug you back, hands gripping the back of your shirt. You squeeze her tight, tears burning your eyes at her confession. You’re proud of her, to say the least. You are aware of how that must’ve been to confess. It makes you happy knowing that she can be honest with you.
You rock back and forth awkwardly, and the giggles she lets out makes you smile. She rubs your back before being the first to pull away, eyes slightly red as she holds back her own tears.
She rubs at her nose aggressively and sniffs. Miwoo gasps. “Shouldn’t you go see Jaemin?”
You think about it, hard. You could go and see Jaemin, to tell him about your feelings, to tell him you’ve broken one of the biggest rules you could’ve broken. You could finally be honest with him and see if the feelings are reciprocated or if everything has always been one sided… but you won’t, not tonight.
You shake your head and Miwoo grins, repositioning herself on your bed and laying her head in your lap, looking up at you with the happiest of expressions. You smile back, running your fingers through the top of her hair and massaging her scalp, letting her relax into your embrace as she plans a girls night between the two of you, swinging her feet excitingly off the edge of your bed and you laugh, nodding your head as you agree along with her, even adding your own ideas and plans.
You never notice your phone lighting up on your desk with Jaemin’s name flickering across the screen.
yangyang: rumour has it eunbin is planning her own welcome home party
donghyuck: shes planning her own???
donghyuck: thats lame lol
jeno: who changed the fucking gc name again
yangyang: who do u think ;)
jeno: ive seen it its not that impressive dude
yangyang: fuck u saggy balls bitch
[donghyuck laughed at this message]
yangyang: anyway
yangyang: eunbins planning her own welcome home party and apparently we’re invited
haru: who said that
yangyang: overheard eunbin say it to jaemin
miwoo: lol no
[renjun liked this message]
miwoo: thanks ren
[renjun disliked this message]
jaemin: yeeun and mia are planning it with her. she invited us all to go
jeno: or did she just invite u
jaemin: its all of us jeno. its this saturday
jaemin: told her im not giving the answer until all of us are going
shotaro: i dont really want to go :( its awkward
renjun: if shotaros not going, i'm not going
miwoo: why the fuck does she want all of us to go
miwoo: her friends hate us
yangyang: correction
yangyang: her friend hates u
miwoo: fuck off yangyang
[donghyuck and yangyang thumbed down this message]
jeno: im not going fuck that
jeno: i dont want to be anywhere near her
jeno: u of all ppl should know that jaemin
jaemin: thats why i said im not giving the answer until all of us are going
donghyuck: i mean
donghyuck: i dont like her at all
donghyuck: but guys
donghyuck: when have we EVER turned down a free party with free drink???
yangyang: he has a point
[donghyuck loved this message]
yangyang: eric and sunwoo are going too so yk sunwoo's got the good shit
miwoo: lol pretty miss perfect is letting sunwoo and eric go???
miwoo: does she know sunwoo sells
donghyuck: probably told him not to bring anything
you: like he'll listen
jaemin: are u gonna go baby
you: oh
you: idk
yangyang: wait im not going if ur not going
jeno: me neither
miwoo: and me!!!
jaemin: ok then we're not going
donghyuck: BUT GUUUUUYYYYSSSS
donghyuck: FREE BOOOOZE?!?!!
yangyang: :/ making me conflicted
shotaro: free drink does sound nice...
shotaro: yeji just texted me to go with her too
[everyone liked this message]
shotaro: i would like to see her
haru: if we go
haru: we go for shotaro?
donghyuck: and free booze
haru: for shotaro and free booze?
renjun: idm that
miwoo: sure
jeno: yn what do u think
yangyang: ?
you: yeah sure ok
donghyuck: fuck yeah
donghyuck: ily guys
donghyuck: gonna make out with u all brb
miwoo: dont come anywhere near me with ur disgusting stinky ass breath
“You look unbelievable” You gush, mouth gaping wide as your fingers rake through his newly dyed blonde locks. Jaemin sits beneath you motionlessly, head resting against the headboard of your bed as he looks up at you with the most goofiest smile as he relishes in the way you touch him, his own hands resting on your hips, sliding his fingers beneath the material of your skirt to grip your skin.
He came over a few hours prior to Eunbin’s party, much to your surprise, adored in a hoodie and beanie, a backpack resting on his back with clothes he would be needing tonight. He swept you off your feet before you could even react at his arrival, carrying you to the privacy of your room as the pair of you shared a laugh, ignoring the looks Haru and Miwoo gave you as you disappeared.
So that’s how you ended up here, sitting on top of his lap, giving him the best of your attention with your eyes locked on his blonde hair, beanie and hoodie thrown to the side without care.
He looks so handsome. You smile, twirling the strands between your fingers. Jaemin doesn’t say a word while you mutter a hundred compliments, watching you with affectionate eyes and that goofy smile you love so much, sliding his hands around your hips to push against your back, bringing you as close to his chest as possible.
He cuts off your babbling soon enough, crushing his mouth against yours in a long awaited kiss. You melt into his embrace, fingers gripping the roots of his hair, afraid he’d slip away or leave again. You haven’t felt his touch nor his lips in so long you almost forgot what it was like. Your heads fuzzy, your skin hot. You missed this.
Jaemin lets out a groan as your tongue slides against his and your grip on his hair becomes harsher. You’re tugging, you’re pulling and his scalp is burning but he doesn’t care, he doesn’t even try to stop you, instead he tugs you closer, teeth snagging down on your bottom lip which you wince at.
“Sorry” He mutters apologies against your mouth and you shake your head, pulling at his bottom lip instead and sucking it. He quietly moans this time, shifting beneath you and heat pools between your legs as you feel the bulge brush against your ass. You pull away from the kiss to toy with the strings on his sweatpants but his hands are quick to latch on your wrist, stopping you.
You look at him in surprise. “What’s wrong?”
Jaemin breathes heavily as he looks at you, lips swollen and red. “I would do anything to fuck you right now, but we can’t”
“Why?” You ask, almost whining. You twist your wrists in his grasp, interlocking your fingers together instead. “We can be quick”
Jaemin hums, squeezing your hands with his, his thumb soothing over the back of your hand while a sly grin. “We could… but I wouldn’t want to be quick, I’d want to fuck you all night, make up for lost time”
“Don’t” You warn him, glaring jokingly. “You can’t say shit like that if we can’t have sex right now, it’s not fair”
“Sorry, baby” He chuckles, leaning forwards to capture your lips with his. You kiss for a few more moments but you part before you allow yourself to get too far into it, going to move off of his lap but he whines, ripping his hands from yours to grip your waist, keeping you on top of him.
Rolling your eyes, you remain still, staring at his face. He’s so pretty. The corner of your lips twitch, cheeks feeling hot as you duck your head, becoming too shy to look at him. Would now be a good time to tell him? Your heart hammers in your chest at the thought and you wonder if he can feel it. You’re alone, there’s no interruptions.
“I really missed you” He confesses quietly. Okay, maybe one interruption. One hand pushes the hair out of your face, cupping your cheeks as he smiles. “Like really missed you”
“I missed you too” You tell him, leaning into his touch.
“I’m sorry that we haven’t seen each other too” Jaemin frowns this time, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips. “I didn’t realise how long we didn’t see each other until—”
“It’s okay” You interrupt, shaking your head. “You don’t have to explain yourself to me, it’s okay”
Jaemin nods, kissing your lips once more before securing his arms around your waist, drumming his fingers against your back. He’s thankful to you, he always has been. He loves how comfortable you make him and how understanding you constantly are. It makes his cheeks flush at the thought of how lucky he is.
“What are you looking at?” You ask him after a moment of silence, brows pulling together curiously. Jaemin blinks as he’s ripped from his thoughts, still staring at you. It takes a few seconds to register in his mind what you had asked and a smile slowly spreads across his lips, soft and genuine, one that makes your heart flutter in your chest.
“You, baby… always you”
You snort at that, jabbing at his shoulder. “What’s gotten into you? Huh? Cheesy fucker”
“What?” Jaemin laughs, rubbing at the spot you jabbed. “I’m not cheesy”
“Oh yeah?” You quirk a brow, crossing your arms over your chest. “You’re telling me that what you just said wasn’t cheesy?”
“What did I say?”
“‘You, baby… always you’” You repeat, deepening your voice to match his. His lips quirk in an amused smile as he shakes his head, claiming how that wasn’t the cheesiest thing he’s ever said. You fake retch, pulling yourself out of his grasp despite his attempts to keep you in his arms, laughing as you walk over to your closet away from him.
He lays down on the bed, tucking his arm under your pillow as he watches you on the other side of the room, flicking through the clothes with a sigh. His eyes wide in surprise as you pull out a black mini skirt from a clothing hanger, holding it on your arm while searching for something to wear it with.
You piece it together with a white bustier top and grin happily, making a mental note in your head to wear your best jewellery and a jacket as you walk back over to Jaemin to set it down on your bed beside his feet neatly. The way you stare so proudly at such a simple outfit makes Jaemin smile, loving how easily pleased you can become with such the smallest of things. Cute.
You both decide to take a shower together, helping each other wash and even sharing a few lingering kisses and touches, the two of you trying your hardest not to do anything inappropriate for the time being despite the urge to.
Later, he promises you and you hold him to that promise, locking your pinkies together before you slip out of the shower while Jaemin stays behind, allowing you to have the time to do your makeup without him standing behind you and questioning everything that you’re doing.
Miwoo, being the expert that she is, comes back and forth between your room and hers to help you with your makeup, cursing at you for moving too much when she uses the eyeliner and forcefully holding your chin in her hand, daring you to talk as she applies your lipstick.
“Haru told me what happened” Miwoo informs before instructing you to rub your lips together which you do. She twists the cap back on the lipstick as she admires her work on your face. “Have you told him yet?”
Your eyes flitter over to your bedroom door in alarm, scared that Jaemin might somehow overhear the conversation over the running water. You shake your head, turning to look at your reflection in the mirror to slightly push up your lashes.
“And why not?” Miwoo crosses her arms over her chest tightly. “Dude, just tell him!!! The feelings could be mutual and—”
“Will you keep your voice down?!” You hiss, waving your hands erratically to shut her up the second you hear the water turn off. You lower your voice. “I’ll tell him… I just need to find the right moment”
“There will never be a right moment” Miwoo says, dropping her arms to her side as she leans down to smooch your cheek. She brushes her lips against your ear to whisper just as Jaemin walks into the room with a towel wrapped around his waist. “Just rip the band-aid off and suck his cock”
You whack her arm repeatedly, cursing her out as she giggles and runs out of your room, not forgetting to slap Jaemin’s bare chest on the way out. Jaemin grunts at the impact, rubbing the sore spot on his chest, glaring at Miwoo’s figure as she rushes out of the room in a laughing fit.
“What was that about?” Jaemin asks as he stands beside you, reaching for his phone off of your desk. He looks at you as he does so, taking in your appearance. He reaches out to gently caress your face, careful not to smudge the lipstick as he presses a chaste kiss to your lips. “You look pretty”
You think about his question for a moment and Miwoo’s words. There will never be a right moment. You chew on the inside of your cheek, nerves tingle through your body and your anxiety spikes, fingertips feeling numb. Rip the band-aid off. It’s so easily done, all you have to do is say those three words.
But you can’t. There’s something forcing you back from saying what you truly want to tell him for reasons unknown, you can’t voice the words that are literally sitting at the tip of your tongue.
So, you dismiss it, muttering under your breath how it’s nothing important and Jaemin stares at you with an odd look in his eyes before dropping the conversation, turning his attention to his phone as he scrolls through his spotify, choosing a playlist for the two of you to listen to while you sit still, annoyed and confused at yourself.
You eye your reflection in the mirror, patting down the creases in your skirt with a sigh and adjusting your top. Jaemin stands behind you with your necklace in hand, helping you clasp the jewellery around your neck securely. He presses a chaste kiss to your shoulder blade when he’s done, reassuring you as feels your anxiety about your appearance and you calm down, sucking in a deep breath.
The commotion you hear in the living room tells you that the others have arrived and Jaemin hands you his leather jacket to which you’re confused about but you don’t question it as you slip your arms through the sleeves. He leads you out of your bedroom, his hand placing your lower back as he guides you down the hallway, the voices of your friends getting louder as you get near.
“Look at you…” Yangyang low whistles as he watches you and Jaemin approach them, reaching out to take your hand in his own to slowly spin you around, biting his lip as he scans your outfit. You roll your eyes as you twirl, fighting back a smile as Donghyuck cups his hand over his mouth and hollers behind him. Yangyang wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. “Sexy”
“Shut up” You laugh, ripping your hand from his grasp to push at his shoulder and all he does is grin widely and reach for you again but stops when an arm slithers around your waist, a hand resting low on your abdomen as you’re pulled into Jaemin’s side.
Jaemin’s eyes bore right into Yangyang’s and the latter doesn’t falter, holding his gaze with a smirk that Jaemin desperately wants to slap off. Thoughts overcrowd Jaemin’s mind, thoughts that make no sense… thoughts that make a lot of sense. His eyes narrow at Yangyang who now takes no notice, his attention brought to Miwoo who’s eager to take a group picture to post on her instagram, earning a huff from Renjun.
Jaemin takes a mental step back, blinking a few times to compose himself as the group huddles together, giving Yangyang one last look as he stands on your left before smiling at Miwoo’s phone who takes the picture, and other, and other, and anoth—
You’re stunned at the sight of Eunbin’s home, unable to shut your mouth as Jaemin leads you through the house as if it's second nature to him. The walls are white, decorated with paintings you are positive Eunbin had made previously, a little but noticeable signature of ‘K.E’ scribbled at the edge of the frame. Fancy light bulbs suspend from the ceiling, laminate flooring clean with no scratch or chip insight. A few people linger around in the living room and the kitchen, giving you the impression that it was going to be a small little welcome party until Jaemin guides you out in the back garden.
It’s crowded, filled with a mixture of familiar and unfamiliar faces, all spread across the neatly trimmed grass and there’s music blasting from a speaker that you fail to locate. Tall white fences hide you from the outside, decorated with pretty vines, hanging plants and fairy lights. There are rounded tables littered all over the garden holding various types of alcoholic beverages that are occupied by most of the party goers and there’s daybeds that are already taken by drunk couples and friends.
Miwoo makes a small comment about how wealthy Eunbin and her family must be before she whisks away to get a drink, dragging Haru along with her and Renjun falls behind, hands shoved deep into his pockets. Shotaro excuses himself from the group to jog over to Yeji who calls him over excitedly, handing him a beer bottle.
Donghyuck, Yangyang and Jeno disappear somewhere as soon as you spot Eunbin standing with Yeeun and Mia around a table, smiling and laughing along in the conversation until her eyes meet yours. She beams, excusing herself from her friends as she bounds over to the two of you.
“Hey!! I’m glad you could make it!!” Eunbin greets you happily, wrapping you up in the warmest of hugs and your eyes widen in shock, not expecting this type of greeting but you immediately reciprocate the hug, the corner of your lips lifting into a smile. She pulls away soon after, giving you a grin before turning to Jaemin, engulfing him in a tight hug to which he lets go of your hand to slowly wrap his arms around her, kindly hugging her back.
You stand at his side awkwardly, looking anywhere but them. You can hear them conversate: something about her, something about the party. Did Eunbin call him handsome? Is Jaemin complimenting her appearance? Your lips form into a frown, unable to control your expressions as you listen to them.
Side eyeing the pair, you notice Eunbin’s hands are still lingering on Jaemin while he smiles down at her, nodding and humming to the things that she’s saying, the two completely forgetting you’re present. Your shoulders slump as your sigh, alreading wanting to disappear from this party and go home but a low whistle and a call of your name catches your attention.
You turn to look over your shoulder, seeing Sunwoo standing at a table nearest to you by himself, hands hiding beneath the table as his fingers expertly roll a blunt. You glance back at Eunbin and Jaemin, seeing the pair in their own little world, figuring it was best to leave them to it as you head over to Sunwoo who seems surprised that you even decided to come over.
“You look pretty” He compliments you, taking in your outfit of the night. His lips quirk into a sly grin. “I’ve seen that skirt a few times”
“Yeah, whatever” You grumble, reaching for the vacant shot glass beside him, not even caring whose it was as you throw your head back and down the colourful liquid, scrunching your face at the burn that trickles down the back of your throat. “Guessing you’re selling secretly tonight?”
“I’ve got to make money somehow” Sunwoo tells you, taking a quick glance down at his hands before looking over at Jaemin and Eunbin. “Pretty boy not giving you attention tonight, huh?”
“You’re extra nosy tonight, huh?” You mock.
Sunwoo smiles at that. “I’m just observant”
“What’s going on between you and Miwoo?” You suddenly pop a question and Sunwoo cocks his head to the side, brows scrunched in confusion. “Saw the comment on her instagram… I’m just observant too”
Sunwoo makes a humming noise, a smile playing on his lips as he sneakily drops a joint into a little baggy that's already filled with premades before shoving it into his puffer coat pocket. He looks down at you innocently, grabbing a beer bottle from the ice bucket resting in the middle of the table and offers it to you.
You scoff but you nod, going to take it off of him but he cracks open the cap with his teeth, spitting it onto the grass without a care in the world as he hands it to you, reaching to grab his own and doing the exact same.
“You called her pretty” You say as you bring the bottle to your lips, taking a swig.
“That doesn’t mean anything” Sunwoo smiles, clinking his bottle against yours as he drinks. He swallows harshly, tongue licking the corners of his lips. “I call you pretty”
“That’s different” You shake your head, scanning around the garden to try and find Miwoo, spotting her by another table laughing with Haru and Renjun. “Did you know she broke up with Jeno? Is that why you’re calling her pretty? Trying to get into her pants or something?”
Sunwoo chuckles. “No”
“Then what is it?” You pry, snapping your head back to Sunwoo as you squint your eyes in suspicion. “Why are you suddenly complimenting her on her posts?”
“I appreciate good looks” Sunwoo shrugs his shoulders, the stupid smile still on his lips. “But, if you must know, she came to me a few days ago asking if she could, and I quote, have a ‘happy pill’. I asked her why and she said the reason is in the name… I told her I wouldn’t give her it unless you were there”
“Oh” You mutter, suddenly feeling terrible. Your chest feels heavy but you take a few heavy gulps of your beer, not meeting Sunwoo’s eyes as he stares right at you.
“Guessing she’s taking the breakup pretty hard?”
“Guess so” You nod, awkwardly rubbing the back of your neck as you spot Jeno from across the garden, standing alone as he chugs his own beer. “I think they both are”
“Why did we stop being friends?” The sudden change in topics almost gives you whiplash and you turn to look at Sunwoo in surprise, noticing that his hands are hidden beneath the table again, probably rolling another joint or fiddling with a baggy.
“Are you high?” Your tone is pretty harsh and mean, but he doesn’t react to it. “You know why we stopped being friends”
“What Eric did had nothing to do with me” Sunwoo tells you, shrugging his shoulders. “Eric was the one that got too overwhelmed in the relationship and decided to be a dick and break up with you, not me”
You blink in surprise. “Overwhel—”
“You should talk to him about it” Sunwoo takes a swig. “You don’t have to forgive him or anything, but I think you should talk to him about what happened. Closure, if you will”
“I hate closure” You grit through your teeth, chugging the rest of your beer down and slamming the empty bottle on the table. Sunwoo smiles as he watches you, finding your reactions and expressions amusing which you catch onto. “Glad you find me amusing”
“I just like how you’re still the same person you were months ago” He shrugs his shoulders. “I like talking to you, it reminds me of the good times. I miss our friendship. Just wish you didn’t shut me out when I had done nothing wrong”
You hate how right he is and you hate how guilty you feel. You did shut him out, you did refuse to be around him or speak to him because of Eric. Pushing everything aside, you had good memories with Sunwoo. He was your best friend before you even got close to the others.
You feel the urge to apologise when you meet Sunwoo’s eyes, opening your mouth to give him a mere pathetic apology that he shouldn’t even forgive but you’re interrupted by his own voice.
“You two look good, you know” He states, jutting his chin in the direction behind you as he finishes sneakily rolling another joint. “You and Na. Never expected it, but you look good together. Do you like him?”
“Why?” You can’t help but ask.
“Curious” He smiles softly. “Nice seeing you happy though. Your smile has always been the prettiest”
“Are you flirting with me right now?”
His smile turns into a grin as he shakes his head. “Just appreciating good looks” You roll your eyes at the same excuse he used earlier, pressing your lips together as you try not to let out an amused laugh. Sunwoo likes the fact you’re having fun with him. “If you like him, you should tell him. I can tell he likes you”
Your tongue presses against your cheek as you smile. “Is that an observation?”
He winks at you. “You know it” His eyes flicker behind you. “He’s leaving Eunbin, by the way. You should follow him. Tell him you like him”
“It’s weird hearing you say shit like that” You pull a face, but you can’t help agreeing with his words. You excuse yourself from Sunwoo and he wiggles his fingers at you in a goodbye, watching you walk away with his chin resting on his hand, a genuine smile playing on his lips.
It’s your mission to follow Jaemin. It’s your mission to tell him how you feel. You steal a shot from a table you pass by, downing the drink and slamming the glass back down on the table as you continue walking, wiping the corner of your lips with the back of your hand. Liquid courage, you think. Definitely needed liquid courage.
Jaemin turns on his heel, heading into a sea of people coming out of the house and as soon as reach out to graze his back, opening your mouth to call out his name, you already hear someone call out yours. You falter in your steps, craning your neck over your shoulder to see Eunbin heading straight towards you and your feet come to a stop, glued to the grass beneath you.
“I’m sorry if this is sudden but can I talk to you for, like, a few minutes?” Eunbin asks you as she steps in front of you, a gentle touch being placed on your arm. You want to say no, to tell her that you’re on a mission to find Jaemin and to tell him everything… but her pleading eyes start to slowly hold you back. “I won’t take much of your time, I promise”
“Okay, yeah, sure” You nod, swallowing harshly and allowing her to pull you into a more secluded area in her garden, a gazebo covered in small potted plants and pretty little fairy lights. You’re in awe at the sight, fingers grazing over the wood as she urges you to sit down on the cushioned seats in front of the firepit. She settles down right beside you when you get seated, sending you a nervous smile that you immediately give back.
The silence that takes over you both is deafening, despite the noise coming from the others at the party but you drown it out as you take this chance to really look at her. Eunbin’s stunning in her short white summer dress, her eyelids covered in the shiniest of glitters and her lips tinted a faint red. Her hair cascaded down her shoulders in small waves, almost covering the priceless jewellery in her ears.
The bright and kind aura she has around herself is enough to make a small smile appear on your face. You can’t hate her, even though you try so desperately to out of pure jealousy. You can’t dislike her either, she hasn’t done anything to you, she's been nothing but sweet since you’ve met her.
And you can’t cry… even when you see the ring that wraps around her middle finger.
“That’s gorgeous” You force your voice out, gesturing to the ring with shaky hands. “Where did you get it?”
“Oh, this has always been mine” Eunbin smiles softly as she holds out her hand towards you, allowing you to take a good look at the dainty silver ring with the black jewel in the middle. “When I got accepted into New York, I left it here for Jaemin… He bought it for me but it was just a little something for him to remember me while I was gone, just to let him know that I will always be thinking about him and that I love him”
“Oh” You breathe out, eyes unmoving from the jewellery. “It’s pretty special then…”
Eunbin nods, staring down at her ring with rosy cheeks. “It is special. I asked him a few days ago if he kept it but he took it out of his drawer and gave it back. I was kinda relieved, to be honest… I thought he would’ve thrown it out after what happened. Did he tell you what happened?”
“Yeah” You tell her, nodding your head.
“I seem like a really shitty person, don’t I?” Eunbin winces, waiting for your reaction but you’re blank, unsure of what to say or even how to react. She clears her throat, tucking her hair behind her ears. “Not that it matters anymore, but from my side, I didn’t think it was that bad… and I guess that made it worse, right?”
“What went through your mind when it happened?”
“I’ve always had this mindset of: follow your dreams and don’t let anyone or anything stop you, true friends and family will always be supportive no matter what choice you make” Her words instantly make you think of Yuta’s. “Jaemin was supportive, he was my number one supporter. He stayed by my side countless of nights when I had deadlines to finish, he helped me find inspiration whenever I felt like I was crumbling, he gave me his shoulder to cry on when I was stressed and he made me feel better”
Your chest tightens as you hear her voice crack, noticing the way she refuses to look at you now, eyes glassy as they stare at the firepit.
“It was my fault for not telling him that the art school I applied for was in New York, but I guess I assumed he would know… I mean, come on, when have you ever heard of big art schools being here?” Eunbin laughs at herself quietly, fiddling with her hands in her lap. “I know I hurt him and I feel awful for it. I’ve apologised so much but I know sometimes apologies aren’t enough… I don’t regret going to that art school, I never will… I just regret hurting someone I love in the process, you know?”
“Yeah, I know” You nod, refusing to meet her eyes this time as she looks at you. I just regret hurting someone I love. The words repeat in your mind, heart feeling like it's twisting painfully in your chest. It makes you feel sick and your throat gets tighter. Maybe the liquid courage wasn’t a good thing.
“Hey, Y/N?” You hum, giving her your attention. “I hope you don’t mind me asking, but…” She pauses, nervously playing with the hem of her dress and you start to feel your own nerves kick in, subtly scratching the skin around your thumb to try and calm yourself down, to remind yourself where you are and who you’re with. Eunbin meets your eyes, pushing her hair behind her ears. “What’s exactly going on between you and Jaemin?”
“What?” You choke out, covering your mouth as you cough when your saliva gets stuck at the back of your throat. Out of all the questions, you didn’t expect her to ask that. You’re reminded of your first awkward interaction at Jaemin’s house when Jaemin blurted out how you were exclusively sleeping together and the surprised look on Eunbin’s face. She knows that much… But what else is there to tell her?
“I’m sorry if it’s an awkward question, especially coming from me” She apologises, kindly patting your back as you try to clear your throat. “I know that you’re exclusive fuck buddies, if thats whats going through your head right now, but I just… I wanted to know if it was more than that or if it’s just that”
“Oh” Your clamming hands rub at your legs, definitely feeling more awkward and embarrassed now. Your whole body feels hot and you struggle to look straight at her, deciding to keep focused on the plants behind her as you try and muster up the courage to tell her that you like him.
“I just…” Eunbin starts to explain herself but she sighs, dropping her hands to her sides.“The thing is, the art school is over, which means I’ll be staying home for a little while until I eventually decide to move out to New York with my own money. Being here, seeing Jaemin again and having the opportunity to be his friend again just brings back so many memories and, I feel like an asshole saying this, but I still love him… my feelings haven’t really changed since day one and now that I’m back, I would just like a second opportunity, you know? I want to make up for lost time and be the girlfriend I should’ve been… but I’m not going to do that and I will step back if the relationship you have with him is more than just fucking, I promise”
“I-I—” You stammer, struggling to find your voice.
“I see the way you look at him” She confesses, giving you a kind smile, complete understanding in her eyes. “It’s how I look at him… So, please be honest with me and I’ll step back, I promise. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable”
But you already have. You’re so stuck, completely unable to give her a response as you stare at her in shock. She still loves him, she has always loved him, things really never changed. You shakily push your hair away from your eyes, trying to control your breathing which has started to get uneven.
You like Jaemin and you don’t want to lose him. You want to be selfish, you want to keep him for yourself. You want to blurt out all of your feelings and emotions to Eunbin, hoping she would understand why you didn’t want to stop what you have with Jaemin.
You feel angry, you feel hurt… but you feel guilty. There’s a voice in the back of your head telling you to feel guilty for taking Jaemin away from Eunbin, for being the thorn in their side and shoving yourself between their relationship even though in the back of your mind that’s not the case at all… but when she’s looking at you the way she is, eyes full of hope and silent pleads, you already know what your answer is.
“There’s no feelings involved, we made rules. We’re just fucking, that’s all it is… But it’s over now… he’s yours”
You look pathetic, sitting by yourself in the gazebo with your fifth drink in hand, vision a little dazey and body swaying side to side as your lips wrap around the bottle, gulping the harsh liquid as fast as you can.
You didn’t move from your place after your conversation with Eunbin, feeling too embarrassed about getting up and leaving so you let Eunbin be the one to dismiss herself first, allowing her to give you a hug goodbye before leaving. You regret lying about your feelings, eagerly wanting to turn back time and tell her the truth but you know you’d look stupid, especially if you find out Jaemin never reciprocated the feelings, which possibly is the case considering he’s been spending so much time with Eunbin instead of you.
Your thoughts get nasty and you hate it, immediately trying to push them to the back of your mind as you take a swig of your drink, legs anxiously jiggling as you observe your friends from a distance. Haru and Renjun are sitting together, knees knocking against each other and drinking out of their bottles, deep in a conversation that makes Renjun’s cheeks flush every so often. You wonder what they’re talking about.
Shotaro’s with Yeji, listening attentively as she speaks, nodding and agreeing along with the biggest heart eyes you’ve ever seen, his fingers wrapped nervously around his beer but you manage to catch Yeji shifting closer, slipping her fingers between his to hold his hand. You dizzily grin at the way Shotaro shyly casts his eyes down to his shoes, cheeks rosy and red.
Donghyuck and Yangyang stand not too far from the pair, both clearly drunk as they send flirtatious winks and thumbs up Shotaro’s way, cheering him on. Yangyang’s a lot sober than Donghyuck is, the latter seeming to be slurring his words and struggling to hold himself up on his own two feet which sends Yangyang into a laughing fit, almost crumbling to the ground under Donghyuck’s weight when he throws himself at him.
Miwoo, much to your surprise, mingles with a bunch of girls that you recognise from campus, talking about something as she passionately throws her arms up in the air and the girls nods frantically, seeming to be relating to whatever she’s saying before clinking their glasses together and taking the shot.
Your eyes somehow find the pair you didn’t exactly want to see in the midst of people, but you can’t seem to tear away from them, watching Eunbin cling to Jaemin’s arm with the brightest of smiles on her face, staring up at his with her big doe eyes that would make anyone waver. The smile on his face is kind and you fail to understand the words that he’s mouthing to her, but the twinkle in her eyes prove it was something that meant the world to her.
You manage to rip your gaze away too quickly to notice Jaemin glance around the party, a look of worry in his features as he tries to look for someone in the crowd, hands nervously twitching at his sides. Eunbin, mistaking him being cold, thoughtfully rubs at his arms, questioning if he would like to borrow a warmer coat which he declines, taking one last look around before giving her his attention.
Abruptly standing up from your seat, you decide to get another drink. You trip over your own feet as you walk, mentally cursing at yourself for wearing heels and even blaming the grassy ground that makes your journey a lot more difficult, trying to balance yourself and walk in a straight line as you head for a vacant table.
“Should you be drinking this much?” Someone questions and your head whips to the side, seeing Jeno standing to your right, watching you struggle.
“It’s not the drink. It’s these stupid fucking heels” You grumble angrily under your breath, almost tripping over your own feet again as you stumble on the grass. Jeno smiles in amusement, swiftly reaching forwards to wrap his fingers around your upper arm to keep you steady and you thank him when his arm slips around your waist, holding most of your weight off of your feet. You smile happily, throwing your arm over his shoulders. “You’re the best”
Jeno grins cheekily at you. “I know”
He leads you both to the table, trying his hardest not to snort at the way you try and walk despite him holding you up. Your curse him out, bumping your hips against his but you can’t help but laugh either, knowing that you probably look so tipsy and stupid.
You untangle yourself from Jeno the second you reach the drinks, leaning your weight on the table as you grab two beer bottles from the ice bucket and you peer inside, surprised at the amount of ice cubes that still haven’t melted, wondering if it’s actually cold outside or if you’ve drunk so much that you’re permanently boiling for the night.
“Why are you alone?” Jeno asks you as he cracks the bottle open with his teeth, throwing the cap back into the bucket. He offers to do the same for yours and you let him.
“Take a wild guess” He rolls his eyes immediately at your answer, already figuring out why you’re not with Jaemin and he doesn’t press further, handing you your beer back with a scowl and harshly chugging his drink. “Why are you alone?”
“I’m not really in the mood for this party” Jeno admits, wiping the corners of his mouth with the back of his hand. “I would love to be anywhere but here right now, I hate it”
“You and me both” You sigh, pushing your hair back out of your face as you take a swig. “I spoke to her earlier, alone”
“Yeah?” He quirks a brow. “How did that go?”
“Fine”
Jeno scoffs. “Liar”
Despite the fact that you are lying, your mouth opens in shock, deeply offended that he doesn’t believe you and is calling you a liar to your face. You flip him off while you drink and Jeno grins at you but he doesn’t pressure you into speaking about the conversation, waiting to see if you’ll talk about it yourself.
But you never do, which makes Jeno worried. He can tell by your facial expressions and the way you’re chugging beers after beers that the talk you had with Eunbin wasn’t as ‘fine’ as you made it out to be. Something clearly happened and as much as Jeno wants to ask and make sure you’re okay, he doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable.
He watches you carefully, seeing the way you glance over your shoulder at the crowds of people, teeth gnawing on your bottom lip. He sees the way your fingers shake around the neck of the bottle, almost spilling it but you subconsciously place it down on the table, intertwining your fingers together to calm you down. Something’s definitely wrong, Jeno thinks, frowning.
“She looks gorgeous… doesn’t she?” You whisper quietly, locked on Eunbin who’s now standing with her friends, Jaemin nowhere in sight as she talks with the most beautiful smile on her face, eyes twinkling beneath the fairy lights, her perfect white dress left untouched much to your surprise.
He makes a disgruntled noise beside you, swallowing down his beer. “I think you’re prettier”
You chuckle softly, rolling your eyes as you nervously play with the jewellery on your fingers. “Thanks, Jeno”
“Don’t compare yourself to her” You’re startled at the tone of his voice, turning to face Jeno with wide eyes. He looks straight at you, expression harsh and serious. “Don’t ever compare yourself to her. You’re a lot better than she is, than she will ever be”
You cast your eyes downwards. “You’re just saying that because you don’t like her…”
“I’m saying it because it’s true”
No matter how hard you try, you don’t believe his words, you can’t believe his words. The insecurity that you feel whenever she’s mentioned or whenever you see her, whether it’s in person or a photograph, is like no other. The confidence that you have disintegrates, withering away and leaving you in a puddle of pure self doubt and anxiety.
It’s strange, you think. She’s done nothing to you, nothing physical or mental, yet she makes you feel the way you do… just by existing. It’s so stupid, you’re so stupid.
Your hand shoots out to grab your drink, desperate to chug down the alcohol and forget but Jeno reaches out, fingers clasping around your wrist. You meet his gaze and he shakes his head, silently telling you not to drink anymore, to not do this to yourself but you ignore him, using your free hand to grab the bottle instead but he’s too quick for you, snatching yours with his.
“Are you really going to stop me from drinking at a party?”
“Maybe” He answers, tilting his head to the side as he eyes you. “Are you really going to compare yourself to her again?”
You fight back a smile, almost losing as you notice Jeno do the same, giving your hands a squeeze before letting you go. You bring the beer to your lips, keeping your eyes locked on Jeno’s as you take a sip and he rolls his eyes, tongue poking at his cheek as he chuckles.
The happy expression on his face soon withers away as he glances behind you, turning stoic as he picks up his beer, averting his attention to the crowd and you go to question his sudden change in attitude until you see the speck of white in the corner of your eyes. Your blood runs cold, the sickly feeling piling up in the back of your throat, body instantly caving in on itself as your arms wrap around your middle.
“Hey” Eunbin beams at the two of you, staggering to the side a little but she catches herself by placing her palms on the table. She laughs at herself, cheeks a little red from the amount of alcohol she’s consumed. “I’m happy you guys are still here! Are you having fun?”
“Very” You give her a tight lipped smile. “Thank you for inviting us”
“You don’t have to thank me” She giggles, placing your hand on your shoulder to give you a comforting squeeze but she sways again, gripping a little hard for some stability and you wince slightly at the contact but you don’t make a noise. Eunbin turns her head towards Jeno, smiling kindly at him but he refuses to give her his attention. “Nice to finally see you, Jeno. I was starting to think you were purposely ignoring me…”
“I am” Jeno nods, his answer short and simple, still looking away from him.
Eunbin reaches out to pat his arm in hopes to get his attention. “Jen—”
“Don’t touch me” Jeno says the second he feels the slightest brush of her fingers on his bicep. His tone is harsh and scary, and the expression on his face is enough to make the hairs stand up at the back of your neck. “Don’t fucking touch me”
“What is your problem with me?” She questions, frowning deeply. Her eyes turn glassy and it looks like she’s going to cry, whether it’s because she genuinely feels hurt by how Jeno’s reacting or if she had drunk so much that her emotions are all over the place. “You always act cold towards me even though I’ve done nothing wrong—”
She’s cut off by Jeno’s dry laugh, watching as he shakes his head while tipping it back to chug down the rest of his drink. The interaction between the two is awkward and you’re desperate to walk away but you know Jeno wouldn’t appreciate it if you left him alone, especially now.
Eunbin sighs. “Can you please just tell me what the problem is?”
“It’s you” Jeno immediately answers, finally turning his head to face her and she flinches at the abrupt movement. His dark eyes bore into hers, unwavering as he stares her down. “It’ll always be you”
“Jen—”
“Go back to pretending everything’s okay” He cuts her off again, still remaining eye contact before he makes the first move to look away, gazing out into the crowd. “You’re good at that”
Brutal. You blink, looking down at your half empty beer bottle, refusing to look at the two as the awkward tension rises. Eunbin doesn’t move, hurt written all over her features and you can tell she wants to bite back but she can’t.
You feel bad for her, especially when she sucks at her lips, tears brimming in her eyes which she tries to blink away. She hangs her head low, turning on her heel and walking away without another word. You face Jeno with a frown and you go to say something about how harsh he acted but you notice the way his fists clench at his sides, jaw tense.
“Was that your first time speaking to her since she came back?” You ask softly and he nods his head, scratching at the back of his neck. He seems uncomfortable, which you hate to see. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine—”
“FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!”
You and Jeno jerk up at the sound of chanting, seeing groups and groups of people eagerly running to the middle of the garden where a crowd forms. Your brows pull together in confusion, trying to peer over their heads as best as you possibly could from your spot and Jeno does the same, standing on his tiptoes.
A bad feeling settles in the pit of your stomach as you see Jaemin rush into the mass of people and you take a few steps forward, Jeno hot on your tail as you push through the bodies. Jeno curses, forcing people to move out of the way as they bump into you both, too amped up and excited to see the fight.
The palm of your hand slaps over your mouth in complete shock at what you witness when you manage to barge your way to the front, seeing Hyunjin get attacked by Donghyuck who pummels his fist down on top of his head and Shotaro hold his nose that gushes out with blood.
Yeji stands at his side, fear and shock written all over her face and Haru stands at his other, swatting his hand away and tipping his head back to help stop the blood. Renjun fumes behind them, chest heaving up and down as he evilly glares at Hyunjin who’s still fighting against Donghyuck.
Jeno’s quick to react, jumping into the chaos and yanking Donghyuck back by his shirt, yelling at him to calm down but Donghyuck refuses to listen, spitting profanities and evil threats Hyunjin’s way. Your eyes flicker to the side to see Jaemin holding back Yangyang who looks furious, knuckles bruises and a cut forming on the corner of his lip, hair dishevelled.
You quickly rush over to Shotaro, coming to his aid and pulling a few tissues out of Haru’s purse, holding them to his nose. He keeps apologising, for a reason you’re not too sure, but you shake your head, telling him to be quiet and to slow down his heavy breathing.
Haru glances between Shotaro and Renjun, knocking his side to get his attention and Renjun looks down at her, the two silently communicating.
You turn your head to Yeji. “What the hell happened?”
“I-I-I don’t know” She stutters, voice wavering and body shaking. “Me and Shotaro were dancing and Hyunjin just hit him”
“Shotaro kissed her and Hyunjin saw. He got angry about it so he punched Shotaro across the face” Haru informs you fully and you immediately spin around, glaring at Hyunjin. He rolls his eyes when you all look at him, wiping the blood from the cut on his eyebrow, letting out a laugh.
“He kissed her in front of me” Hyunjin tells you, wincing as he touches a different wound on his nose. “That little bitch did it on purpose—”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Donghyuck hisses, lunging for Hyunjin again but Jeno stops him, forcefully holding him back and demanding him to calm down despite how angry he was himself. He didn’t want to cause anymore trouble, not tonight anyways.
Hyunjin finds it amusing that Donghyuck and Yangyang are both being held back by others who so desperately want to step in and punch him. Felix, who has been desperately trying to tug Hyunjin away from the situation and begging for him to be quiet, shakes his head at Hyunjin’s behaviour, nervously gnawing down on his bottom lip as he Hyunjin points at Donghyuck and Yangyang while laughing loudly, seeming to go make a comment about Shotaro too but it never comes, he’s quiet.
Especially when he’s clipped across the face by Miwoo’s hand.
The crowd dies down, some ‘oohing and ‘ahhing’. Hyunjin cradles the side of his raw cheek, completely stunned at the action and Miwoo blankly looks at him, unbothered.
“Come on, laugh” Miwoo urges him. “It’s funny, right? Laugh. Do it” She raises her brow expectantly, putting her hands on her hips. “Want me to do it again? So we can both laugh together?”
She lifts her hand to strike again but Hyunjin steps back out of her aim, shaking his head quickly, face reddening in embarrassment. Miwoo scoffs, dropping her hand to her side with a tut, not happy with the way Hyunjin’s reaction.
“Pathetic” She sighs. “Boys”
“He’s not going to hit a girl, you freak” A voice states from the crowd, a familiar one, a female. You fight the urge to roll your eyes as you recognise its Yeeun and you turn to look at Haru who looks done with the whole situation, mumbling how it’s time for all of you to leave which you couldn’t agree more.
“I don’t mind” Miwoo grins almost manically. “Come on… you guys wanted a fight, didn’t you? Don’t tell me you’re taking back your words because a girl wants to join in on the fun… or is it the fact that you’re going to go up against someone who is actually going to hit back?”
The crowd is even more silent at that, knowing exactly what she’s talking about. Shotaro wouldn’t hit back, he’s not a violent person, which you know deep down that they all took advantage of until Yangyang, Donghyuck and Miwoo stepped in to defend their friend.
Some people look down, ashamed at being called out while others remain stoic, just continuing to stare at Miwoo as she eyes them all before stopping at Hyunjin. She smirks at his expression, rolling her eyes and lets out a halfhearted laugh all while turning to face Shotaro.
“Let’s get the fuck outta here… This party was boring anyways”
“Well… that was an experience” You admit as you walk into Jaemin’s bedroom, laughing awkwardly as you rub at the back of your neck.
After the fight, you all left Eunbin’s party in a hurry and decided to go grab some food at the burger shack, sitting around the table and gossiping about what happened (after making sure Shotaro was okay and that his nose wasn’t broken).
Donghyuck and Yangyang reenacted the fight, throwing over the top punches at each other and succeeding in making Shotaro laugh when they praised him for taking Hyunjin’s punches like a champ, calling him ‘the strongest badass alive’ which Shotaro beamed at.
Even Miwoo commented on how proud of Shotaro she was, cooing at him and pinching his cheek. Renjun and Jeno were still angry but Renjun calmed down after a while as Haru muttered things into his ears, caressing his thigh and giving him soft smiles.
Jeno remained angry while Jaemin was quiet. He stared at the table, saying nothing throughout dinner but when it was time to leave and everyone wanted to go back to the apartment, he had pulled you aside and asked if you could come home with him so the two of you could be alone.
You wanted to decline at first, wanting all of you to go back together but decided against it when it dawned on you that you really needed to talk to him, to discuss things that you wished would disappear and be forgotten about.
“Tell me about it” Jaemin chuckles, closing his bedroom door behind you both. He unbuttons a few of the buttons on his shirt, kicking his shoes off to the side as he looks at you. “Did you have a good night?”
“Yeah, it was fine” You nod stiffly, toeing off your heels.
“You don’t have to lie to me, you know” He tells you. He knows you like the back of his hand. He can read you so easily, you’re like an open book to him and you detest it a little, especially when he seems so closed off to you. You know everything about him and yet, you still know nothing at all. It’s frustrating. “I know you didn’t really want to go, but I’m happy you did”
“I did it for you” You say without looking at him, too shy to meet his eyes.
Jaemin raises a brow. “For me?” You hum with a short nod. “Why would you do it for me?”
Because I like you. “Because you wanted to go”
“I didn’t want to go” Jaemin furrows his brows. “I would’ve been fine either way, you know that. I just wanted to know what you wanted to do, I would’ve followed what you wanted”
You look at him this time. “Really?”
“Yes” Jaemin laughs, nodding his head as his arms wrap around your waist. You hold his arms, staring up at him. You’re unsure of how you’re feeling right now. You want to pull away from his embrace, knowing that it’s wrong to allow him to hold you like this after the conversation you had with Eunbin. But you also want to pull him as close to you as you possibly can, to hold him in your arms, to have his skin on yours, his lips.
Jaemin ducks his head down to press his lips to yours but you move back before he can even do so. He furrows his brows at you in confusion as you step out of his arms.
“Jaemin, I…” You pause, fidgeting in your spot. “I need to talk to you about something”
“Okay?”
“It’s important—” You gulp. “A-and I don’t really know how to start it or what to even say and I—”
“Hey, breathe” He tells you, instructing you to breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth, demonstrating it in front of you and you copy, quitting your rambling to try and calm your erratic heartbeat. The proximity between you both makes your head spin, feeling his breath fan across your face doesn’t help you relax but your fingers can’t help but graze against his chest, itching to pull him closer to you and ignore everything else around you.
His hand comes up to stroke the back of your head affectionately, staring down at you with those pretty brown eyes that make you weak, knees almost buckling under his gaze but you try your hardest to hold strong.
“Jaem…” You whisper his name.
“God, you look so beautiful” He whispers back to you, his hand coming down to caress your cheek with the prettiest of smiles and it makes your heart ache. The way he’s looking at you right now makes your head spin and you feel choked up, trying your best to blink away the tears that threaten to form. You want to distract yourself from tearing up and you do it in the worst way possible by surging forwards to connect your lips with his, completely forgetting about the talk you wanted to have with him as your fingers curl around his shirt.
His arms slither around your waist, pressing you close to his body as his mouth moves against yours, capturing your bottom lip with a soft bite and you gasp quietly. It gives him the opportunity to push his tongue between your lips, meeting yours in the soft kiss.
He smiles against your lips, pulling you closer as much as he possibly can as your fingers rake through his hair. Without a doubt, you’re addicted to him. You’re drunk on his touch, you’re putting in his hands, you yearn for more every time he touches you… you can’t get enough of him.
The rhythm that your lips move in is so gentle and soft, a kiss that you’ve never shared before but it’s starting to mean so much to you that you almost plead and beg to have him back when he pulls away.
Jaemin lowers himself, bending his knees as his hands latch onto the back of your thighs and you automatically jump, wrapping your legs around his waist as he grips your thighs tightly to hold you up, reconnecting his lips with yours as he expertly manoeuvres around his bedroom.
He sits down on the chair at his desk, comfortably settling you in his lap with your knees on either side of his hips. His hands rest at your thighs, gripping the bare skin between his fingers as mouth moulds with yours and you bring him closer with your arms. You feel his hands rub up and down your thighs before pushing up your skirt, letting it bunch around your waist messily.
You gasp when he presses his fingers against your clothed core. He smiles when he feels the wetness between your legs seeping through the lacy material and you unbuckle his belt, pulling his cock out of his pants just as he yanks your panties to the side.
You refuse to waste anymore time, having not been laid in so long makes you desperate and you’re not afraid to show or admit it, neither is he. He aligns himself at your entrance, his eyes locked on yours as you lower yourself down, gasping at the feeling of him inside you, stretching your walls and fitting in snugly.
He chases after your lips the second he bottoms out, trying his hardest to control himself. He wants to savour this moment and frankly, so do you.
“I appreciate you so much” He whispers sweet things in your ears and you shake your head, telling him to stop but he doesn’t. “I appreciate you so fucking much”
“Jae…” You warn him. He doesn’t listen, as per usual.
His hands cup your cheeks to bring you forwards, lips softly kissing the skin of your forehead, your eyelids, the tip of your nose. You’re basking in his touch, kissing the pad of his thumb as it rubs against your bottom lip. Jaemin smiles, watching your head lean back in bliss when he rolls his hips upwards to meet your speed, adjusting his grip around the back of your neck to pull you in.
He pecks your lips once, twice, three times before connecting his mouth to yours, kissing you so affectionately it makes you feel dizzy, so lightheaded that you’re afraid you’re going to pass out.
You steady your hands on his shoulders in the midst of the kiss to help you rise and fall down on his cock slowly, your eyes rolling to the back of your head in pleasure and whines and cries spill from your lips when his cock hits the sweet spot.
Jaemin’s the one to move back from the kiss, watching you with his mouth wide open, heavily panting every time your ass meets his thighs when you take him whole, his stomach caving in as he sucks in deep breaths.
The way he’s looking at you right now sends a shiver down your spine, his fucked out expression with hazy eyes staring into yours, refusing to break eye contact which you have already done so many times due to the pleasure that’s pooling in the put of your stomach.
You mewl as he hits the spot inside you again, thighs shaking at his hips and you clench around him involuntarily. Jaemin gasps at the feeling, fingers gripping your waist tightly as he tries to pull you closer.
“I’m not going to last long if you keep doing that” Jaemin breathes out with a grunt, licking his lips as he glances down at where your bodies connect, watching himself disappear inside you with a moan. “Fuck… you’re so beautiful, baby”
“I…I…” You struggle to find your voice when your core clenches, a band forming in your stomach, almost bringing you closer to your orgasm. “I… ‘gonna cum”
“Me too” He tells you, raising his hand to his lips, tongue licking at his thumb before he presses the digit to your clit. The sudden action makes you tense up, the air being knocked out of your lungs as you cum around his cock, leaving you breathless as your walls convulse around him, whining as he thrusts to reach his orgasm.
“Baby..” You cry out prettily, still creaming around his cock. Hearing you call him such an endearing name for the first time sends him over the edge, hot liquid spilling inside of you with a high pitched moan you have never heard come from him before.
You collapse on top of him from exhaustion, resting your chin on his shoulder and everything inside of you snaps, the tears freely streaming down your cheeks. Your hands cling to his back, fisting the material of his shirt in your hands tightly as if he could easily slip away from your fingers. He holds you close to him too, breathing heavily as his hands rub up and down your back soothingly, helping you both come down from your orgasms, cooing softly in your ear.
Jaemin doesn’t move, keeping his cock inside of you with a smile, leaning back against his chair comfortably with you and his one hand moves to the back of your head to keep you as close to him as he can.
He’s unaware of what’s going on behind him, he can’t feel the tears drip from your eyes and seep into his shirt. He can’t hear the words repeating in your head. He can’t see the pain that’s on your face.
He also didn’t know that this is the last time you will both be in this position.
summary ⇾ after witnessing a particularly erotic scene of a couple from the apartment across from yours, you find yourself unable to erase the thoughts of being taken the same way that woman did by your own boyfriend—against the window, bare for everyone on the street below to see
WARNING // 18+, explicit sexual content, unprotected sex, vaginal sex, oral (m&f receiving), breeding kink, degradation, choking, fingering, dirty talk, hair pulling, exhibitionism, voyeurism, multiple orgasms (f), creampie, spanking and a lot more i can't possibly list, basically pwp, absolutely filthy, overuse of the petnames princess & baby lol
WORD COUNT // 10.1k
AUTHOR'S NOTE // i haven't written smut in like a year so just bear with me here. also, don't let the word count fool you, this is mostly explicit content with no plot or characterisation whatsoever lmao. i also want to apologise for how long this is, i got carried away while writing. this is my first work on this blog so pls drop a like or reblog, thank you, enjoy <3
It's the middle of February. The sun had just disappeared below the horizon, leaving you to stare out your apartment window to look at the darkness that had befallen the city. Although the sun is no longer visible, the city is still buzzing with life, and the streets are flooded with pedestrians. It's apparent by the way some of them walk that they have grown weary of the long day they just had and want nothing more than to return home and rest.
You'd like to think that Jaemin is amongst the swarm of people speedily walking, but you know his job rarely ever allows him to come back home at the same time most people usually finish their work. When you had first started dating him, you occasionally wondered to yourself whether you would've been better off with somebody with a more ordinary job instead, but your love for Jaemin far outweighed those troubling thoughts.
As you retreat to your bedroom, you pause at the doorway to stare at your king-sized bed. From where you stand, the bed looks oddly large without Jaemin occupying the space. His presence alone can make your apartment feel so warm and homely.
As you shrug off your robe to reveal the nightgown you're wearing underneath, your eyes move to the glass window across from the bed, catching subtle movements from one of the windows in the apartment building opposite yours. You peek through the sheer curtain to get a better look and gasp aloud when you finally comprehend the situation.
A naked woman pressed against a window, her breasts bare for everyone walking out on the streets below to see. If anyone looks up, they would be able to see the man driving into the woman's sex from behind, his mouth caressing her ear as he whispers to her what you would assume are either praises or degradations.
The sight, although somewhat alarming, sends a bolt of heat right down to your core, and you find yourself gripping onto the window curtain just a little tighter. You were never one into exhibitionism, but the thought of being in the woman's place with Jaemin thrusting into you from behind was... exhilarating to say the least.
You know you should turn away. You feel shameful for invading someone's privacy like that, but your curiosity surpasses the guilt bubbling inside of you, and you find yourself watching for a little longer, unable to wrench your gaze away from the couple even if you wanted to.
Your eyes widen when one of the man's hands shifts from the woman's waist up to her breast before finally settling around her neck, squeezing. The woman gasps, her legs squeezing tighter at the sudden lack of air. Tears are cascading down her face, evident by the lines of mascara staining her cheeks.
The warmth between your legs feels even more fervent as time passes, accompanied by the peculiar sensation of the dampness that is slowly accumulating in your underwear. God, how long has it been since Jaemin fucked you that way? When was the last time he had his way with you like that? It felt like so long ago, especially since you haven't seen him much due to his group's comeback and hectic schedule.
You can almost imagine the sound of the man's hips slamming furiously against the woman's, can almost hear the desperate noises that slips past her swollen lips as she chases her high. She's almost there, judging by her shaking thighs and curled toes. One little push is all she needs to come tumbling down.
Absorbed in the lewd scene unfolding in front of you, you almost miss the sound of the front door shutting close. Footsteps can be heard as the person makes their way across the living room. Despite that, your eyes stay glued on the couple, wanting nothing more than to watch them finish together.
The man's hand has now travelled between her thighs, rubbing fervently on the bundle of nerves between her legs. Her breath fogs up the glass as she screams, overwhelmed by the sudden stimulation from his fingers. Just a little more, just a little longer.
The bedroom door creaks open behind you, and you turn to find Jaemin standing in the doorway, staring curiously at you. Your boyfriend greets you with a tired smile as he walks in, clad in his beloved mint hoodie and grey sweatpants with a backpack slung over his right shoulder.
He finds it unusual that instead of greeting him, you rush over to cover the sheer curtains with the silk curtains that allow you to have complete privacy from the outside world, or in this case, let the people outside have privacy over your wandering eyes. He notes the way you stand with your back facing him for a couple of seconds before finally swivelling around on your heels to smile at him.
As you approach him, Jaemin also notes the rapid rise and fall of your chest and the rosy flush of your cheeks. To put it simply, it looks as if you had just been thoroughly fucked, and the thought of you touching yourself while he was gone sent blood rushing down to his crotch.
"Hey, you're home earlier than usual." You peck his lips, grabbing his bag from his shoulder to set it down on the chair. "You cleaned up at the company?" you ask as you comb your fingers through his damp, dark hair.
Jaemin responds with a nod before sitting down on the edge of the bed, still watching you inquisitively. You can't help but let your eyes rake over his delectable figure. Your insides are still boiling from the passionate incident you just witnessed, and the heady scent of your lover isn't helping at all.
"What were you doing before I got home?" he questions. There is no malice or mistrust in his voice, but the teasing edge in his tone has you worried that he might've seen what you had seen, and he is now testing you.
Afraid your face would betray you, you walk to your vanity table in hopes of being able to speak while keeping your face concealed from him. Jaemin is awfully attentive, and he knows you like the back of his hand, so it would take a miracle for you to be able to go through without raising any alarm.
"Well, I took a bubble bath and then had the leftover Chinese for dinner, then I washed the dishes and watched TV," you recount, managing to leave out what you had seen just before he came home. The image of the couple flashes briefly in your mind, and you inhale sharply to suppress the inappropriate thought.
You hear shuffling behind you and look up at the mirror, only to see Jaemin taking off his hoodie, revealing the white shirt he is wearing underneath that does nothing to hide the outline of his lean torso and broad shoulders. You briskly look away, willing your raging hormones to calm down.
"I had such a long day," Jaemin speaks, yawning. You hear him stand, making his way to you. "Can't remember the last time I was home this early." Slipping his arms around your waist from behind, he pulls you flush against his front.
You swallow when you feel his lips brush against your earlobe, his hot breath fanning across your cheekbone. You catch his eyes through the mirror, blinking when he flashes you an innocent smile. He kisses your temple once before pulling away, leaving you feeling dizzy at the fleeting contact.
"W-what are you doing?" you stutter out when he suddenly parts the curtains, peering outside of the window. You watch in horror as he continues to stare outside, anxious at the thought that the couple from before might still be there.
"I was hoping we could go out for a walk or something, but I'm just so tired."
To your astonishment, Jaemin lets go of the curtain and nonchalantly walks to his bag to take out his phone. You keep your eyes trained on his back as you ponder about whether he saw the couple at all. Jaemin proceeds to go to his side of the bed before plopping down with his phone in hand. He releases a sigh as he closes his eyes.
Gingerly walking to the bed, you lie down beside him, mind still feeling like a jumbled mess. You almost flinch when Jaemin suddenly turns to his side to sling an arm around your middle. "It's okay, Nana, we can go some other time. We have all the time in the world," you mumble, gulping when you realise his close proximity.
His eyes flutter open, making your breath hitch in your throat at how dark and beautiful they are. He has an expression on his face that you have seldom seen before. You can't help but glance down at his plump lips, noticing he is smiling, obviously quite amused at something.
"Why are you smiling like that?"
He shrugs as he let his hands roam down to your thigh, squeezing the flesh there momentarily before maintaining its previous position on the curve of your waist. Everything about him is slowly driving you crazy, you're sure of it. From the subtle scent of his citrus body mist to the way his black hair frames his delicate face, everything feels so surreal when it comes to Jaemin.
"Go to sleep now," you urge him as you brush his cheek with your thumb. "I'll be here when you wake up." With that, you twist your body to turn off the night light on the bedside table.
"Night, baby," he murmurs drowsily.
Minutes pass as you both lie motionless in the dark. Jaemin's breathing has evened out on your back, indicating that he has fallen asleep. You, on the other hand, find it a challenge to sleep after what you saw. Your body is yearning for your lover's touch, but you know better than to wake him up after a long day of work. It would be selfish to disturb him during his resting time.
Clenching your thighs together, you hope to at least find some relief from the pressure, but it seems as though the only way to alleviate your neediness would be to reach release. However, that doesn't seem very likely, considering you sincerely don't want to wake Jaemin from his slumber with your movements and sounds.
A few more minutes pass with you debating internally about your next course of action. With a frustrated sigh, you let your hand drift down between your legs, freezing when you feel Jaemin's arm tighten around your waist. You crane your head to look behind you, relieved to see that Jaemin is still peacefully sleeping.
Lifting one of your knees slightly, you let your hand cup your mound through your underwear. You need more, though, so you push your underwear to the side to let your cool fingers come in contact with your bare heat. You sigh when you begin to rub at your slick folds, feeling instant relief from the much-needed friction.
It isn't long after that you begin to gasp quietly every few seconds, unable to attempt to hide the pleasure coursing through your body. Biting your lip, you press two fingers inside, eyes scrunching shut at the sudden fullness. Slowly as to not make too much movement, you pump your digits in and out. It feels so good, but it's nothing compared to what Jaemin can make you feel with his fingers.
Your legs begin to shake at the impending orgasm. You can hear your heartbeat in your ears, beating fast and loud as you chase your release. It's so close, yet so far away somehow. You need something—just a little push. God, you're so so close.
"Baby," Jaemin's raspy voice is the first thing you hear before the night light on his side of the bed is turned on.
You screech, mortified at the fact that he had caught you touching yourself. Before you can pull your digits out, though, Jaemin grabs your wrist, preventing you from moving it at all. "J-Jaemin," you whisper, face flushing. "I'm sorry, I couldn't help it—"
He interrupts you mid-sentence with a click of his tongue. Shuffling closer, he presses a kiss to the spot on your neck that never fails to pull a whine out of you. "You were just getting there, weren't you? Why don't you continue for me, hm? I want to watch."
"I didn't mean to wake you up—"
"You can make it up to me by continuing. Please?"
"You w-want to watch me touch myself?"
He replies with a hum, nuzzling his nose against the crook of your neck, occasionally licking at the skin there.
Gulping hard, you resume your movement from before, now with the gentle guide of Jaemin's hand around your wrist. You press your mouth against the pillow, trying to muffle the sounds slipping past your lips.
Letting go of your wrist, he pushes you onto your back, forcing you to face the ceiling. "I want to hear you, baby, don't hold it in. Let it out for me."
You manage to pry your eyes open just slightly, wanting to look at Jaemin's face as you touch yourself. When your eyes connect with his, your legs clench shut as you moan. "Jaemin," you breathlessly speak.
He smiles knowingly. "I'm right here, keep going," he whispers, pulling at one of your knees, urging your legs to stay spread apart.
You feel Jaemin push your nightgown up until it bunches around just underneath your breasts. His hand slips underneath the flimsy fabric, his fingers making contact with your nipple.
He pinches once, watching in amusement as your back arches at the pleasurable pain. "Curl your fingers like how I usually do it," he instructs, eyes locked on the frantic motion of the hand between your legs.
Complying to his request, it doesn't take you long to find that spot within you that has you writhing in your spot, legs threatening to close at the newfound sensation. The side of Jaemin's knee stays pressed against your right thigh, securing your leg to the bed, leaving you unable to close your legs even if you tried.
"O-oh, oh, fuck," you breathe out as you cease the movement of your fingers to press your palm against your slit. One look at Jaemin has you resuming on gliding your slick fingers in and out again. You feel slightly frustrated, though, knowing your fingers are nowhere near as long as your boyfriend's and can't reach the places he can with perfect ease.
"I-I think I'm—"
Jaemin doesn't let you finish your sentence, gripping at your chin and pressing his lips to yours in a searing kiss, brushing his tongue against your bottom lip. It's exactly what you need to stumble over the edge, letting the blinding pleasure consume you whole.
You reluctantly pull away from the kiss to suck in a breath of air, feeling as though you can't get enough air into your lungs as you crumble under Jaemin's watchful gaze. Your free hand clutches at his white shirt, crumpling it in your fist as a whine escapes past your lips. It's only when the pleasure has subsided that you notice the gentle brush of his fingers on your arm, coaxing you to come back to him.
"I'm sorry I woke you up." These are the first words you utter to him once you finally regain your ability to speak again. You wince when you pull your fingers out, feeling a drop of your slick drip down onto your thigh. "Let me just clean myself up."
Instead of letting you go, Jaemin pushes himself up onto his arms, hovering above your panting figure. He settles himself in between your thighs, pushing down onto your naked bottom with his hips.
"J-Jaems, you'll get your pants dirty," you warn, pushing at his chest with your clean hand, willing him to return to his previous position.
"Yeah?" he questions with a grin.
You are just about to ask what he's doing when he suddenly grabs your wrist, wrapping his mouth around your slick-coated fingers. You choke on air, taken aback by the boldness of his action. He makes sure to lick every drop of your slick before pulling away with a resounding pop.
"Nana..." you mumble, already feeling heady as you speculate how the night is going to unfold. You are suddenly painfully aware of the wicked gleam in his eyes and the outline of his stiff member in his sweatpants, nudging at your lower stomach.
He chuckles lowly. "What's got you so worked up tonight, hm, princess?"
Rolling your hips up in hopes of getting him to realise what you need, you're disappointed when he pecks your lips once before pulling away to sit back on his heels. His large hands settle on your thighs, prying them apart. He coos softly at the sight of your underwear, damp with your release, sticking to your drenched folds.
His fingers inch closer until they graze the hem of your underwear, so close to where you need him the most. You watch his eyes darken when you utter a quiet plea, trying to convince him to give in. "Answer my question first."
With an impatient huff, you tear your gaze away from his to look at the ceiling. "I just... I'm just in the mood, but I didn't want to bother you."
Jaemin blinks down at you, gaze locked on yours as he suddenly presses his thumb onto the wet patch of your panties. He drags his thumb up and down your clothed slit, watching as your eyebrows furrow in exasperation.
"That's all?" he asks, momentarily halting the languid motion of his thumb.
You nod frantically, not at all concerned about the fact that you had just lied straight to his face. All you can think about at this exact moment is his fingers and how much you want them buried inside your pulsating hole.
He retracts his hand to settle them back onto your thigh, hushing your whine of protest with his lips, kissing you so sweetly that you completely lose track of mind. You have a hunch that there is something severely wrong at this point, but Jaemin's kisses are so addictive that you completely overlook all the warning signs.
He pulls away, attaching his lips to your neck, sucking on the supple skin there to leave dark marks that will remain there for the next few days. He briefly pulls away to tug your nightgown over your head before tossing it onto the floor, leaving you in your soiled underwear. His mouth trails lower until they reach the valley of your breasts.
You tuck your chin into your chest to watch him, sucking in a deep breath when he encloses his mouth around your right nipple, only to swiftly pull away to continue his journey down south. Your fingers curl into the hair on the nape of his neck as you relish the feel of his warm breath hitting the skin of your stomach, sending shivers down your spine.
"Hurry, please," you plead, growing increasingly restless at his slow pace.
He smiles against the hem of your underwear, acknowledging your request but not complying, which only serves to aggravate you. "Don't be greedy," he scolds, pressing kisses onto the heated skin of your inner thighs.
You shake your head, lifting yourself onto your elbows so you can get a better look at him. He tilts his head to meet your eyes, keeping his mouth pressed onto your thigh. "Please, Jaems, I need your tongue," you try once again, to no avail.
"I wanna take my time with you."
Groaning, you let yourself plop back onto the bed. You mentally tell yourself that you would only have to endure Jaemin's incessant teasing just a little longer.
Without any warning, he attaches his lips to your core, dampening your panties even further with his spit. You cry out, eyes shutting at the long-awaited pressure on your core. It still isn't enough, though, so you tug at his hair, willing him to move his mouth away so you can reach down and yank your panties to the side, exposing yourself to an oddly-composed Jaemin.
He pulls your hand away from his head before you can guide his mouth back onto you. "I said I wanna take my time with-"
You abruptly sit up. "I know what you said, but I really need you, Jaems," you say, directing him to move up the bed and lie on his back. "I really need you," you repeat as you take off his white shirt, mind filled to the brim with the need to touch him.
You can't help but stare at his figure as you sit beside him on the bed, in awe of how beautiful he is as he lies there, clad in his sweatpants with a noticeable bulge straining against the thick fabric. You swallow when your eyes trace across his chiselled abs, across the plane of his taut chest and finally settling on his face. Na Jaemin is breathtaking.
"Hey," he whispers, thumb brushing against your cheek. "You went somewhere else for a sec."
Shaking your head, you finally get a hold of yourself. You kiss him hard, teeth clashing against teeth. You want him now more than ever. You reach down toward his pants, pushing at the hem. "Take it off," you mumble against his lips.
He grabs at your wrist, halting your movement. You're about to complain, but he speaks before you can say a single word. "I want you to sit on my face."
Arousal surges through you at his words. You're sure that if you aren't wearing any underwear, your slick would already be dripping down on the bed.
"I want to taste you." He grabs your hips, assisting you with positioning your legs on each side of his head.
"Oh!" you yelp when you hear an audible rip. You haven't fully comprehended what had happened before Jaemin's hands on your hips are hastily pulling you down.
You gasp, eyes widening when he slots his mouth to your core, sucking earnestly at your folds. "O-oh shit, f-fuck, fuck," you stammer out, hands blindly flailing around to grab onto something, anything. One hand settles on the headboard for balance while the other buries itself in his tousled hair.
Lost in the ecstasy, you let your eyes fall shut as you roll your head back, face parallel to the ceiling. Jaemin keeps up a moderate pace, alternating between licking bold stripes over your slit and sucking your clit.
"Oh my- fuck, I need...please." You've lost your ability to speak coherently, something that's not uncommon whenever Jaemin has his way with you. His tongue circles your entrance, not dipping in, only teasing. You tighten your grip on his hair, letting out a breathless plea.
It's only when he hums and the vibration from his mouth travels through your trembling form that you finally loll your head forward to look down at him, hips bucking in reflex when you meet his darkened gaze. He hums disappointedly, using his hold on both of your thighs to move you away from his mouth.
You are now able to see the lower half of his face, drenched with your wetness. He presses gentle kisses onto your inner thigh, but you are barely able to register it before he is pressing his fingers onto your core, running his fingertips over your folds, spreading it apart with two fingers so he can see what's hidden underneath.
He coos quietly, eyes trained onto your core. "Everything about you is so pretty, you know that, right?" It's a rhetorical question because as soon as he asks it, he's pushing his index finger into your hole, smirking when he feels your walls clench around it. "Pretty face and an equally pretty pussy."
"Please," you beg, breathless from the feel of his finger dipping in and out of you.
"Hm? What do you need, baby?"
You shift slightly, hoping the new position would allow his digit to press against the spot inside of you that could have you seeing stars in less than a minute. He seems to notice your intention, halting his movement entirely, leaving you to whine out in protest. "Need your mouth, please."
"Oh, you don't need my fingers, then?" He's about to pull his finger out when you grip his wrist in your hand, shaking your head frantically.
"No, both your fingers and your mouth. Please, Jaemin."
He bites his lip in an attempt to contain an amused smirk. "You're going to have to be more specific, baby." He watches you hesitate for a few more seconds before resuming the in and out motion of his finger, even adding another finger in not long after.
"Y-your mouth, please." You lean forward, bringing your aching pussy closer to his inviting mouth. "I need your mouth on my pussy, Nana."
Jaemin turns his head, pressing his lips to your inner thigh as he curls his fingers inside you. He listens intently to the sweet sounds that spill out of your mouth, sounds of ecstasy that only he can pull out of you. He feels his cock harden even more at the thought of being the only one to be able to see you in this light—so obscene and needy for him.
"Please don't tease," you wail out, desperate to reach your first climax of the night.
Satisfied with your begging, he looks up at you once again before diving in and enclosing his lips around your clit, simultaneously speeding up the pace of his fingers. Your eyes clench shut at the sudden onslaught of pleasure. You feel as though you're about to combust when you force your eyes open to look down at him, finding his lust-filled eyes are already looking up at you.
"F-fuck, don't stop." Your grip in his hair tightens when he reaches up to grab at your breast with his free hand, pinching and pulling at the hardened bud with his thumb and pointer finger. "N-nana, I'm gonna cum. Please, can I cum?"
He pulls his mouth away briefly to answer. "Just a little longer, princess. You taste so fucking sweet. I should just quit my job and do this all day long, hm? What do you think about that?"
You're no longer unable to contain your moans now, letting the high-pitched sounds echo through the apartment. "Can't... can't hold it, Nana."
You're thrashing in his hold, curling and uncurling your fingers in his hair because you don't know how you can delay your climax when his fingers are nudging against your sweet spot and his tongue is lapping at your clit rapidly.
You glance down at Jaemin when you hear him groaning every few seconds. Looking over your shoulder, you realise he has pushed his sweatpants and boxer down just enough to expose his member. You widen your eyes at the sight of his cock, so pink and pretty, with pre-cum smeared all over the reddened tip. He's pumping it with his fist almost languidly as he pleasures you, and it's this sight that has you careening fast toward your oncoming climax.
"Fuck, gonna cum, gonna cum, 'm gonna-" you've barely warned him before you're abruptly reaching your peak, crying out as you lock eyes with Jaemin who's eyes hold nothing but affection and filthy promises. He's lapping at your slit, savouring the taste of your juice on his tongue.
Jaemin stops the movement of his hand on his cock, squeezing it at the base instead to stop himself from cumming to your lovely sounds. He helps you through your orgasm, pulling his fingers out to lap at your slit with his tongue, relishing the taste of the sweet nectar trickling past your hole.
You're rolling your hips to the movement of his tongue, hissing at the delicious overstimulation. Jaemin's a little disappointed when you eventually roll off of him, leaning against the headboard to catch your breath.
He turns to the side to face you, making sure you're watching him before making a show of shoving his fingers into his mouth, sucking at them to clean off your slick. You squeeze your thighs together, having already recovered from your orgasm. "Jaemin," you drawl out as you crawl down the bed, eyes zeroed in on his thick cock, twitching in his hand.
You settle in between his legs, knees tucked underneath you. He lets you pry his hand off his member, and watches you as you tentatively wrap your hand around it, licking your lips as you lean closer.
"What's with the look, princess? You wanna taste it?"
Glancing up at him, you nod. "Yes, can I? Please?"
"How could I refuse when you're asking so nicely?" He brushes his fingers through the strands of your hair a few times before finally gripping it for good. His grasp on your hair isn't harsh as he guides your mouth to his cock, but it stings just enough to make have you reeling with excitement.
You begin with kitten licks all over the tip, revelling in the sounds of his quiet gasps. Jaemin's a patient person but you know he's tired of your teasing when he tightens his hold in your hair, urging you to take him into your mouth. You refuse to give in, wanting to give him a taste of his own medicine.
He tugs on your hair hard, causing you to yelp as you look up at him. As expected, he's glaring down at you, thin lips set into a displeased frown that has you nervous and eager at the same time.
You refuse to give in so easily, though, so you keep your eyes on him as you continue licking at his tip, swirling your tongue around the precum gathered around his tip and flicking it across the dip of his slit. You trail your tongue down his shaft until you reach the base.
"Put it in your mouth, baby," he says, jaw clenching when you ignore his instruction yet again. "Hm, this is how you want to play tonight, huh? Thought you were so eager to taste me."
"You teased me too, so it's only fair if I get to do it too," you snap back with a pout, hoping it'll soften the blow just a little.
Something flashes across his eyes, and you don't have the time to decipher it before he's pushing you onto your back, letting your head dangle over the edge of the bed. You gasp when his hand wraps around your throat, fingers pressing into the sides of your neck hard enough that you know it's definitely a warning.
With his free hand, he pulls down both his sweatpants and boxer, leaving him just as naked as you are. He sits back on his heels before spreading your legs and hooking them over his thighs. "You're going to regret teasing me when I'm done with you, sweetheart."
"You deserved it."
Instead of getting angry, Jaemin only grins, but you've been with him long enough to know it's not exactly a genuine one. His eyes are taunting and for a second you question whether it had been wise to tease him at all. Well, it's far too late to contemplate it now.
You feel his fingers graze softly over your inner thigh. In your position with your head dangling over the bed, you're unable to see what he's doing with his hand, unable to predict his next move. You can barely see his face when he leans back, so you shut your eyes instead, relying on your other senses to try to predict what's going to do with you next.
"Nana!" you cry out when he suddenly pushes two fingers inside. The sudden intrusion burns so deliciously, and you find yourself bucking your hips to cope with the abrupt pleasure that's coursing through you. Jaemin doesn't tease you like thought he would, wasting no time curling his fingers and adopting a pace that's fast enough to have you cumming in a matter of minutes. "F-fuck, f-feels good. So good."
He chuckles under his breath, leaning down to take your nipple into his mouth, laving his tongue over it and humming when he feels it hardening against his tongue. "I allowed you to cum all over my tongue, and this is how you repay me? I should've just went back to sleep and leave you to take care of your problem if I knew you were going to be a brat like this."
You're gasping for air, feeling dizzy from being upside down for so long. You can't find it in you to care, though, not when his fingers are driving in and out of you the way it is and the slick sound of your soaked pussy is resonating through the room so loudly.
He moves over to your other nipple, repeating the same process he did with the other nipple. The grip around your neck tightens just slightly, and you find yourself choking on air. It's hard to breathe, but you don't say anything, only moaning brokenly as you chase your high. "F-fuck, I'm cumming. N-Nana!"
Jaemin pulls his face away from your heaving chest. He wants to see your face when you reach your high. He loves to know he's the only one that can have you this way, the only one who can pull such filthy sounds out of you.
Your eyes flutter open, and you lift your head to look at Jaemin, but he pushes down on your neck. "You can cum, but you can't look at me."
It takes you a few seconds to understand what he says, but once you do, you're whining pathetically and shaking your head. "Please, Nana, I-I want to see you."
"No. This is your punishment, so take it like a good girl."
You're so close, your orgasm only a few seconds away. You want to look into his eyes, want to unravel under his hungry gaze, but you know you took your teasing a little too far and the only way to redeem yourself is by carrying out the punishment he has given you.
You can do nothing but rely on your imagination as you near your climax. You imagine his eyes trailing over your body ravenously, imagine the way his heavy cock twitches whenever your walls clamp around his fingers, sucking the digits in until they're knuckles-deep. But it's not those that push you over the edge, it's his dulcet voice, sounding dazed and raspy. It's his sweet voice that has you bucking your hips wildly, toes digging into the bed and knees pressing against his hips as you succumb to the blissful sensation. "Cum for me like a good girl and I'll fuck you until you're crying."
Jaemin gives your neck one last squeeze before dragging his hand down to your breast, squeezing and kneading at the soft flesh as you try to regain your composure. He shifts back a little, allowing you some more space on the bed. With your head now positioned properly on the bed, you stare down at him through half-lidded eyes, wincing when you feel the ache in your neck from being bent at such an awkward angle.
Jaemin chuckles when he pulls his fingers out of you, holding his hand up to show you the wetness covering his two digits, some trickling down onto his palm and knuckles. He smears it all over your thigh, ignoring your whine of protests as you try to push his hand away.
"Tired?" he asks, moving your legs off his thighs.
"A little."
"Sucks for you." You're slightly confused at his words, but don't get to dwell on it any further because Jaemin's already hauling you up and flipping you onto your hands and knees. "Cause I'm not done with you just yet, princess."
A sudden, sharp pain on your backside has you keening forward. It only occurs to you a moment later that Jaemin has just spanked you hard. His palm lands on the other cheek this time, and your elbows give out underneath you, causing you to fall face-first into the mattress. "F-fuck, Jaemin."
He strokes his hand over your spine, causing a pleasant shiver to wrack through you. "Did you think you could tease me and get away with it? I've spoiled you too much, haven't I?"
You don't answer and regret it only a second later when he slaps your ass again. "Y-Yes! I'm sorry, Nana."
He leans forward and grabs hold of your hair, tilting your head up so you're looking up at him. "You're not sorry, princess. You're a bad girl, aren't you? My little whore."
You whimper, shaking your head as tears start to blur your vision. Everything is too much, yet not enough at the same time. You love Jaemin like this, so ruthless, but you know that deep down he respects and adores you deeply. Perhaps it's the fact that his darkness only shines through when you're being intimate that makes you want him so much more. You love the fact that you can bring out the feral side of him that he would never otherwise display in his day-to-day life.
"Open," he instructs, pointing his chin at your mouth. You consider pushing your luck further, but immediately decide not to when you see his stern glare. You let your mouth fall open, lolling your tongue out for good measure. He seems pleased at your compliance, pursing his lips before spitting onto your tongue.
His spit is warm when you draw your tongue back into your mouth. You're about to swallow it when Jaemin tells you not to. "Keep it in your mouth. If I find out you've swallowed it I'm going to leave you hanging, and we both know how much of a cock slut you are for me, so don't even try."
He lets go of your hair, and you press the side of your face back down into the sheets, making sure to keep his spit in your mouth. All you can think about at this point is having his cock inside of you. You're desperate for it, and you want nothing more than for him to slide into you and pound you into the mattress.
You stiffen when you feel his shaft gliding up and down your folds, lubricating himself with your slick. The tip catches onto the hood of your clit, and the delicious press of the blunt head against your swollen bundle of nerves have you tightening your grip on the bedsheet. You want to beg him but you're afraid that his spit will dribble out of your mouth when you speak, so you resort to pushing your hips back.
A slap to your right thigh is all you need to know that he's going to do this at his own pace, and you're going to take what he gives you with no complaint. "Remember, princess, I can easily walk out of this room right now and jerk off in the bathroom." He circles the tip of his cock around your opening, pushing in just enough for you to feel the stretch. "And you'll be here all alone, trying to cum with your fingers buried in your wet pussy, but you know it's not going to be enough, because your fingers don't compare to my fingers or my cock, right, baby?"
You hum in agreement, clenching your teeth when you feel him slide halfway in. You want him to continue until he's as deep as he can possibly be and his balls are pressed against your clit. You don't care if it burns. With Jaemin, you find that the pain always blurs with pleasure and only leaves you craving for more, more, more. You'll take whatever he gives you.
"Please," you manage to mumble with a mouth full of spit, both his and yours. The thought of his spit mixing with yours has your walls clenching. Jaemin notices this and groans as he savours the tight squeeze. As he pushes the rest of himself inside of you, he can't help but think about how good you feel around him, so warm and so tight. Being buried inside of you feels like heaven for him, and he wants nothing more than to spend the rest of his life being able to sink himself into your exquisite cunt every morning, day and night.
"Fuck, baby, you're perfect." His grip on your hips are tight enough to bruise, but that's the least of your worries. "Your pussy was made for me. Fits me so well."
He starts at a slow pace, watching closely at the way his cock disappears into your drenched pussy. The view is nothing short of pornographic, and he grits his teeth to stop himself from getting too riled up too quickly. It's not his fault that you look and feel so wonderful.
He hunches forward until his front is pressed to your back and plants open-mouthed kisses on the skin of your upper back. The heat of his mouth combined with the feeling of his length plunging in and out of you has you trembling with need. You can feel the veins on his shaft grazing against your walls every time he moves.
You feel his breath fan against your ear, and can't help but cry out when a particularly hard thrust is delivered. The spit in your mouth immediately drips out of your mouth, leaking down onto the bed. It would feel disgusting if only Jaemin wasn't drilling into you with such precision that you felt as though you were ascending closer to heaven each passing second. "N-Nanaaa," you drawl, fisting the sheets on each side of your head.
The snaps of his hips against yours are hard enough to bruise. He wraps a hand around the nape of your neck, pushing the side of your face into the sheets. "Princess, is my spit still in your mouth?" he asks, and you're suddenly aware that you've had your mouth open for quite a while, and the spit that was once contained in your mouth are now seeping into the bedsheet, leaving behind a prominent, dark spot.
Jaemin's movement completely stills as you snap your mouth close. The thought of lying crosses your mind, but you know it would do you more good if you just told the truth. Besides, Jaemin most likely has seen the staining on the sheets by now. You try to twist your head so you can apologise to his face, but Jaemin's hand on the back of your neck prevents you from turning at all, so you swallow and shake your head. "I'm sorry," you mumble sheepishly, eyes trained on the wall of your bedroom. "I'm sorry, but it just felt so good, Nana."
Jaemin contemplates your apology for some time before pulling out of you, leaving you to whine at the empty feeling. Dread creeps into your stomach when he pulls away from you completely, moving away from the bed toward the curtains covering the window.
Sitting up, you wipe the side of your mouth with the back of your hand, cleaning off the drool as you watch Jaemin intently. Your eyes greedily drink in the shape of his figure. His cock, glistening and still hard, bounces against his toned stomach as he walks. The muscle of his back flexes when he rolls his shoulders, and something about the way he so casually does it has you feeling lightheaded.
"Jaems?" you call out hesitantly, unsure of what he's doing.
He grabs hold of the curtains before glancing back at you with questioning eyes. Realising his intention, you stand, dashing toward him with an alarmed expression. "Stop, wait, what are you doing? We're both naked."
He lets go of the curtains, reaching up his hands to cup your cheeks, tilting your head up so he can press his lips to yours. The kiss is tender and soft, a stark contrast to the way he had been fucking into you just moments before, and you immediately melt into him. You pull away when you feel his member poking your stomach. "Please, Nana, I need you," you mumble against his lips.
He chuckles, and you notice that it's a mocking one. "Did you really think I would forget the fact that you lied to me?"
"W-What? I didn't lie. I said I was sorry!"
One of his hands is on your ass in an instant, giving a warning squeeze. "I think we both have different things in mind, sweetheart. Do I have to remind you or can you use that cute brain of yours to figure it out yourself?"
Truth be told, you have no idea what he's referring to, so you try your hardest to remember, although it's so hard to think about anything other than having him inside of you again. Jaemin bends to latch his mouth to your neck, sucking at the sensitive spot just underneath your ear. "I don't... I don't know what you're talking about."
He reaches around you to press two fingers into your core from behind, slipping them in with ease. He's gazing down at you with a smile, but his eyes are dark and menacing. "Do I have to tell you everything, princess? Are you that drunk off my cock that you can barely remember anything?"
"N-No, Nana." You're shaking in his hold, fingers curled tightly around his arm, afraid you'd just fall onto the floor without his body to support yours. "I can remember. I can-"
"Then tell me." He's looking down at you tauntingly. He knows you don't remember. "Does my dumb, little baby need help to remember?"
You arch up against him when he brings your nipple into his mouth, tongue circling your areola. You try not to focus on his fingers or his mouth, but it's proving to be harder than you thought. "I d-don't know. I give up. Nana, I give up," you say after a while, afraid that if you take any longer, Jaemin would punish you even harder.
He pulls away from your breast with a loud pop. "Hm, should I just show you, then? Maybe that would jog your memory? Open the curtains, princess."
To say you're startled by his request would be an understatement. With his fingers no longer pushing in and out of you, you're starting to come down from the pleasurable high you were in just seconds before. One glance at the curtain has your mind spiralling back to the moment you were standing by the window just before Jaemin came.
"W-Wait... you saw..."
Jaemin turns you around forcefully, pressing himself against your back. "I said open the curtains." His tone is harsh, but the way his hands are softly caressing your hips makes it clear to you that he's asking for permission. He's giving you the green light to decline and back out if you feel uncomfortable by what he's asking of you.
The dragging of the tip of his nose against the skin behind your right ear interrupts your train of thoughts, and you turn to the side to look into his eyes. As expected, Jaemin's gaze holds a tenderness that has your stomach lurching. "Okay," you whisper as you turn back to open the curtains.
Your reflection along with Jaemin's is the first thing you see on the glass of the window. When your eyes finally focus on the scenery outside, you find yourself swallowing when you see the apartment across from yours, the one that had once been occupied by the couple shamelessly making love against the window. The curtains are still pulled back, but the couple is no longer in sight, although there is light spilling out of the crack of the bathroom door.
Looking down, your first instinct is to back away from the window, afraid that the pedestrians walking on the sidewalk would see you naked. There's anxiety bubbling inside you, but also an excitement that you've never felt before. You can't help but lick your lips at the prospect of being caught. What would that person do if they saw you? Would they look away from embarrassment? Would they keep watching?
Jaemin hears your breathing pick up and doesn't waste any time asking whether you want to stop. You only twist your head before slamming your lips onto his, pulling him into a violent kiss that has you moaning into his mouth every few seconds. You feel feverish, craving for Jaemin to fill you up once again. Running out of breath, you gently clamp your teeth onto his bottom lip and pull back. The affectionate look in his eyes is quickly replaced by something more feral.
"Put your hands against the window, baby. I need you now."
You do as he says, jutting your hips out slightly. "F-Fuck, Jaemin, please just put it in," you plead, pressing your forehead against the surface of the cool glass as Jaemin glides the tip of his cock up and down your folds.
He growls once he finally pushes in, bottoming out in one thrust. Your breath fogs the glass as you pant. "So good. Please, Nana, faster."
Jaemin's hands reach around your body to cup at your breast. Your fingers are curled into fists against the window as you lose yourself in the feeling of him pounding into you. You force your eyes open to look down at the street below, shuddering when you see passersby walking up and down the street so casually, oblivious to the fact that you were only a few floors above them, about to explode around your boyfriend's cock.
"Oh god, Jaemin!" You cry out, knees almost buckling when Jaemin thrusts into you harder. He pulls his hands away from your chest to grab both of your arms, bringing them back to use as leverage to fuck you harder. Your nipples graze the cold glass whenever Jaemin rams into your from behind, sending chills down your spine. "Jaemin, f-fuck. I'm close. So close."
He's fucking you relentlessly against the window, mouth tucked into the crook of your neck, breathing raggedly into your ear. "You lied to me, so why should I let you cum, hm?"
"P-please, can't hold it, Jaems."
It's obvious by the way your walls are pulsing around him that you're trying to hold off your orgasm. "Apologise and I might just let you cum."
You don't hesitate to plead for forgiveness, not wanting to cum without his permission. "I'm sorry for... for lying. N-Need to cum, please."
"Lying about what?"
He gathers your arms into one hand, bringing the free one around to rub circles into your clit that has you rising onto your tiptoes. You almost lose your train of thought, almost forget the fact that Jaemin's still waiting on your apology. "I'm sorry f-for lying to you about... about—"
Jaemin interrupts your sentence to deliver a sharp thrust that pulls a loud cry out of you. You know it's only a matter of seconds before you cum, so you rush through your apology, babbling your words deliriously. "Sorry for not telling you what I saw in that other apartment."
"Did you see them fucking like us, hm? Fucking like rabbits with the curtains open so everyone down on the street can see? Did you like what you see, baby?"
"Nana, I'm cumming!"
He smiles against the column of your neck, loving how desperate you become whenever he has his cock deep inside you. "Show me how she came, princess. What sounds do you think she made when she did?"
The tight coil in your stomach finally snaps, and you're suddenly thrown into a whirlwind of pleasure, head thrown back to rest on Jaemin's shoulder. You're shaking against him, eyes pressed shut as you cum so hard you see stars behind your eyelids. You're unaware you're chanting his name amid your bliss, but Jaemin can hear it loud and clear as he slows the pace of his hips, making sure to help prolong your orgasm by rubbing his fingers on your clit.
With a hum, he releases your arms from behind your back, and you immediately grab the hand between your legs, halting the motion of his fingers. Opening your eyes, you're slightly relieved to find that the apartment across from yours is still absent of the couple from before.
Jaemin lets you push yourself away from the glass, cock slipping out of you. You turn to face him, legs still trembling and threatening to give out underneath you. He immediately wraps his arms around your waist, smiling down at you fondly before pecking your lips. "Sounds like you came pretty hard. I didn't know you were into exhibitionism."
"I didn't know until today either," you mumble timidly, craning your neck to look up at him. "But you haven't cum yet."
You squeal when he suddenly slides his hands down underneath your thighs, picking you up. Your hands fly up to intertwine behind his neck while your legs wrap around his waist. He steps closer to the window, allowing it to support some of your weight.
His usually soft, brown eyes are glazed over with hunger. You can tell from the way his gaze roams over your body that he wants to ravish you and break you down until you're nothing but a sobbing mess.
It doesn't take long for the ache in between your legs to return. You're tightening your legs around him, begging him to slip back into you. Jaemin kisses you a little too long for your liking, but it's all worth it in the end when he finally reaches a hand down to align himself with your hole.
You're holding your breath as you sink down onto him, nails digging into his shoulders as you feel your walls accomodating his size. You're panting by the time you've reached the base of his cock, feeling so full as he suckles at the skin of your shoulder.
Jaemin groans when he shifts and unintentionally presses himself deeper into you. In this position, his tip is just kissing your cervix, and you moan when you feel him start to move. "Harder, f-fuck."
You lean your head back onto the window, eyes closing as Jaemin starts snapping his hips faster, filling you up so good. His nose nuzzles into your cheek. "You want me to fill you up? Want me to stuff your tight pussy with my cum, princess?"
Your skin prickles at the sound of his voice. "Cum inside, Nana, please."
"Yeah? You like it when I cum inside you? You better keep it all in, baby."
You dip your head forward to rest it against Jaemin's shoulder. "N-Nana," you purr when you look down to watch his glistening cock plunge in and out of you.
Jaemin lets go of one of your thighs, letting it drop onto the floor. You dig the ball of your foot into the ground before bucking your hips, meeting his thrusts halfway. Jaemin hisses at this, sinking his teeth into his bottom lip.
"Fill me up, Nana. Want you to come inside, please."
Jaemin's movement falters a little when he comprehends your words. He's close, you know it. You reach your hand up, smoothing back the hair falling over his forehead so you can look into his eyes. Before you have the chance to, though, he's capturing your lips in a kiss that has you feeling hazy.
When he pulls away, Jaemin opens his eyes to look down at you but is distracted by a movement over your head. You're surprised when your boyfriend starts snickering out of the blue, noticing his eyes are set on something behind you, something out of the window. "W-What is it? Is it the couple?"
"Mhm, wanna give 'em a show, baby? Show them how good I can make you feel?"
You make a move to turn your head, but Jaemin cups your jaw before you can, bringing your face close to his. "Keep your eyes on me, do you understand? Want you to cum to the thought of me only."
He buries his face into your neck, muttering praises into your ear as he fucks you, filling the room with sounds of your gasps and the slapping of skin against skin. There's a newfound fervour in his thrusts, you notice, but you're not complaining.
"I'm cumming," you whimper, pussy clamping around Jaemin's length as you feel yourself start to approach your high.
"You love it when people watch you, don't you? Like it when they see you being a little cum slut for me?" Jaemin grunts, thrusts faltering when he pulls back to watch you. You're moaning drunkenly as you try to hold back your orgasm, jaws slack and eyes rolling back.
His gaze then falls onto your chest, and he finds himself awestruck by the way your breasts are bouncing every time he thrusts into you. He takes one bud between his fingers, pinching and tugging it forward, earning him a piercing cry from you, who's on the verge of falling over the edge.
The sight of your face—eyebrows furrowed and drool slipping past one corner of your lip—has his balls tightening. He's growling and panting into the open air, basking in the way your wet pussy feels wrapped around his throbbing cock. "You always feel so good, princess. Always so good for me."
"P-Please, can I cum? Can't hold it."
Jaemin doesn't get the chance to answer, because he's already emptying himself inside of you, abs flexing as he paints your walls with thick, white spurts of his cum. You force your eyes to stay open as you allow your orgasm to finally wash over you, wanting to watch your lover as you both reach your high together.
Your heart is drumming against your ribcage as the pleasure overwhelms you. Your skin feels ablaze as your orgasm sweeps through you, leaving you light-headed as you take in Jaemin's state. His cheeks are flushed as he throws his head back, skin slick with sweat and shoulders littered with crescent marks from your nails digging into them. He releases a hoarse groan that has you squeezing even tighter around him, milking his cock dry.
You sob when you feel Jaemin bury himself deeper into you, forcing some of his cum to leak out of you, trickling down past his balls and onto the floor. Your insides feel so full and warm as the both of you stay in each other's embrace.
Jaemin lets go of your thigh in favour of wrapping both his arms around you, panting as he leans his forehead against your shoulder. You try to stand by your own, but your legs feel so limp so you rely on Jaemin to keep you up.
"Shit... that was..."
You nod in agreement, still breathless from your intense orgasm. You stiffen against him when a certain thought enters your mind. "Are they... still watching?"
"I don't know. Want me to look?"
You push him away by his chest, frantically turning and closing the curtains to shield yourself from any onlookers. Jaemin snickers from behind you, wrapping his arms to pull your back into his chest. "Stop being so cute or I might just have to go another round."
"Oh my god, shut up! You just made me cum three times. Give me a break."
"I don't know, baby, maybe we should give that couple another show. What do you think?"
Jaemin laughs when you only reply with a huff. The room reeks of sweat and sex, but he can't bring himself to care when he has you in his arms like this with your face glowing crimson and neck littered with purple marks.
He feels so warm inside, and can't help but think that he wants to be able to do this with you for the rest of his life. It's too soon to do anything about it, you're both too young to take another step ahead, but Jaemin knows there's no one else he would rather grow old with.
"I'm so happy, Jaems. You make me so happy."
Jaemin swears his heart is about to burst out of his chest with giddiness. "I feel the same way, princess. I love you so much, don't ever forget."
You turn your head to look at him with a shy grin. "I love you too. Now let me go pee. Your cum is still dripping out of me."
Jaemin smiles as he reluctantly lets go of you, watching your naked figure saunter away to the bathroom. It only takes one glance at your perky ass, bouncing with every step you take, to have his cock hardening again, and he's chasing you into the bathroom to have another round in the shower.
wc <0.5k, genre: smut, pairing: ljn x reader, warning: nipple play
Jeno padded into the bedroom, screwing up his lips to hide a smirk. His black eyes gleamed with mischief.
You were sitting on your bed, breast feeding your baby girl, Nabi. She was nestled in your lap and your strappy top was pulled down to reveal your boob.
“Jaemin… dared me to… drink…” he cleared his throat. “Your breast milk.”
Your lips popped open.
“He said I’d be too scared. Bet me fifty dollars I couldn’t.”
You laughed, but your core was already tingling. Jeno’s shameless pink lips… your nipple… his hot, wet mouth…
“There’s a bottle of breast milk in the fridge. T-try that.”
“Nuh uh.” Jeno shook his head. “Want it from the source. Organic.”
You gulped. “You want to… drink from my… breast?”
Jeno’s voice was husky. “Can I?”
You nodded, biting your lip in anticipation.
Jeno jumped up and placed the sleeping baby in her cot. You pulled off your top and unhooked your bra. Your skin rippled with waves of excitement.
Jeno crawled onto the bed, eyes locked onto your naked chest. His tongue flashed over his lips.
“You’re so hot for letting me do this.” he murmured. “Best. Girlfriend. Ever.”
Jeno leant down and kissed your sternum, his soft lips calming your fluttering nerves.
His hand gently cupped your breast. It felt so nice, being touched like this, after months of only a hungry baby pawing at your chest.
Then, his lips closed over your nipple. You felt him suck. Jeno’s eyelids fell shut in pleasure, his strong hand clutching your thigh. You let the sensations take over, became primal.
You gasped, your hands clutching his soft black hair. He pulled back too soon.
“Well…” you began. “What was it like?”
“Sweet.” His face curved into a smirk once again. “Guess Jaemin owes me fifty now.”
Jeno: Can we still fuck? Are you dating Jaemin now or something?
You: Or something. You home?
Jeno: All alone.. come over? I’ll do everything you like.
You: On my way.
Jeno knew what you really liked after all.
“You got here fast.” Jeno smiles leaned against his front door frame. Vein enhanced biceps bulge over his bare chest with his arms crossed. His build more lean and ripped than usual mid-swim season. You don’t bother responding, distracted by his low-hung sweats. Thick cock shape pronounced against the material making your mouth water already.
Jeno knew how to fuck you right. Half sad the most memory you could muster up from last time was the limp that followed. Johnny and Jeno had really taken it out of you.
“Staying the night I’m guessing?” Jeno steps aside. Relieving you of the weight of your overnight bag from your shoulder.
“If you’re really going to do everything I like, am I supposed to be able to drive home?” You reply extra snarky. A suggestive glint in your eye threatening Jeno’s text message.
You learned enough about his competitive streak from the last few years watching him swim. Throwing a tantrum and punching in walls whenever he’d lost. That was when Jeno fucked you the best. Leaving you gasping for air within an inch of your life. With a scoffed tsk your finger drags down the center of his tight stomach- “How disappointing. I rushed over here for nothing.”
Jeno’s head tilts, eyeing over your figure. Bag dropped to the floor to be forgotten. Heavy steps corner you in, pressing you against the now shut front door.
“Want me to fuck you until you pass out again? You can’t even handle me baby. Don’t tease me like I don’t make you cry and beg for some God to save you everytime.” Jeno drawls reaching for your waist. Large hands encasing you tightly forcing you to gasp for breath.
Your smirk only grows, sucking in your chest to reply with more attitude- “You think you did that Jeno? That was Jaemin.”
That’s all it takes. Jeno’s eyes flicker hot with fury, blinking away the moment of surprise. Fingers dig into your sides roughly with a shake strong enough to pull you to your toes. Neck collapsing, the back of your head meeting the door with a light thud. A mocking gaze trained on Jeno’s angry eyes. The tension quickly rising to his neck protruding veins around his Adam’s apple.
The idea that anyone could fuck you better than him could drive him up a wall. Especially if that anyone happened to be Jaemin. Jeno was just too easy to set off.
His iron-like jaw tightens, teeth clamping together behind his lips. Large hands gathering your breasts in a deadly squeeze. Your eyes roll up as he finds your hardened buds between the fabric of your blouse. Underwear tossed off before exiting your bedroom, knowing they’d be of no use here.
Jeno leans in, nose crushed into your cheekbone. His thigh making space between yours shoving at your core. Cotton fabric rapidly moistening upon meeting your bare center. His teeth drag along your skin, raspy throat sending tremors down your spine- “Gonna fuck your ass ‘till you’re crying. Slutty pussy cumming around nothing over and over again. Don’t bother begging, not gonna stop no matter how much you do.”
“You’re talking way too much for someone who hasn’t even made me cum yet.” You snap back. Hips rolling down against the stiff muscle thickening up with each flex. Sturdy thigh muscle shoving up harder lifting you off the ground as Jeno forcefully fucks between your legs faster. His knee bruising against the door with every motion sending you bouncing. Arms fling around his broad frame to hold yourself in place. Jeno’s strength jerking you up and down hard. Bundle of nerves rubbed raw along the fabric of his sweats. Breathless in seconds, you resort to begging despite his commands- “Make me cum, want you. Please Jeno..”
“I know..” Jeno huffs, ripping your top open. Buttons sadly hanging on by threads. He was too fast, too sloopy. Knew he had enough stamina to fuck you over and over again, no point in wasting time. His weighty palms crush your chest, shoving your breasts up high under your chin. Tongue lapping the dip between your perked mounds. His forehead nudging against yours spurring you to meet him half-way. Jeno’s tongue brushing your lips hitting his nose against yours. Whispering heatedly with a drag across your upper lip- “Jaemin can’t make you cum this easily baby.”
Your brows screw up, mouth dropped, panting into Jeno’s. Tongues meeting in pace with each thrust. Licking up the bridge of your nose, Jeno dips down finding your chest again. Face burying in-between nibbling and sucking. Thigh slowing down to a rolling motion stirring your clit into a frenzy. His eyes shoot up catching the despair twisting your features together.
“Want me in your ass baby? Be a good slut for me. Cum.” Jeno rasps. Throat already scratchy and dry from his own heated arousal climbing up through his mind. Teeth clamping down on your nipple with a tug to finish his instructions. Your chest sinks, pulling a less than attractive face. Hips come to a stand still, trembling down the length of Jeno’s thigh. Slick smeared all over his sweats like a badge of accomplishment.
Teeth sink in, burning your flesh surely leaving behind marks. Jeno nipping your areola enough to hurt. Orgasm momentarily consuming you too much to push him away. Sliding a hand over your face to wipe the sweat away. Mustering enough energy to latch onto one of his shoulders.
“Fuck me. Please, please Jeno.” You beg. Regardless of telling you that won’t work, you knew better.
Jeno nods, just once, cupping the back of your head dragging you away from the door. Hips flush against yours, noses sliding back and forth together. “You gonna be a good little whore for me baby? Fuck that slutty ass on this cock?”
“Yes! Yes yes yes Jeno. Please, please.. I need, need it. So wet for you, only get wet for you like this.” You lie, of course. Jeno didn’t need to know the truth. Pussy speaking over mind by now, willing to say anything to get what you want.
“Be good for me.” Jeno shoves you down to your knees. Strong hold on your head smashing your face into his crotch. Suffocating you with a powerful drag across his hardened size. “Gonna take whatever I want. That’s what you like right baby? Used up, good for nothing but taking my cock.”
Jeno has you gasping, clothed cock blocking your air. Stumbling past the entrance of his parents house coercing you to crawl. Knees burning with every beat down on the wooden floor. He finally lets you go, tossed down in-front of a wall length mirror in the living room. Curtains drawn open shining rays of sunlight all throughout the room. Anyone passing by would be able to catch a glimpse of you absolutely distraught, loving every second of it.
Jeno stands straight, tall body looming above you drawing a shadow over yours. Light surrounding him like a deceiving halo. Chin pointed, directing you to his sweats. Getting back on your knees you clutch at his thighs. Nails scratching down haphazardly wrenching his bottoms down. Cock revealed inch by inch sending your eyes wide with each peak. Jeno kicks them away, rock hard body shown off in all it’s glory.
“Take off your clothes.” He bites, placing hands over his hips. Serious demeanor more than enough to make him loud and clear. He didn’t need to tell you twice. Practically ripping off your mauled top along with your bottoms. Turning over presenting your ass for him knowing what he likes all to well. Ready and willing for his next moves without instruction.
Jeno bites back his smile, falling down to his knees. Large hands barrel down on your ass with burning slaps. Body jolting forward hitting the top of your head into the mirror ahead.
“Fuck Jeno..” you dizzily mumble. Top of your head aching, backside on fire as he continues. Landing consecutive slaps down on your fleshy bottom. Jeno was strong, strong enough to hit you with impact. Tingles surging from his palm to your core. Wetness rubbing nastily between your squeezed thighs. Grasping your abused cheeks to spread you open, exerting a rumbled groan. Jeno focuses on your clenched ass, recalling he wasn’t the one that fucked you there last time.
“The way your ass blows me kisses baby.” He laughs cockily. Thumb rubbing circles around your rim. Thick cock swiping between your soaked clenched together thighs. Jeno rolls forward, cockhead smashing against your clit. Spit spilling down from his lips to meet his thumb. Taking time to rub over your awaiting hole.
Jeno’s hips work faster. Cock coating in your wetness slipping in and out between your thighs. Fat length spreading your folds open. Sloppily rubbing past your clit just enough to hurt. Pussy itching for more, entrance winking over his length. Jeno’s thumb glides inside, pulling a grin across his face.
“Little sluts ass is always ready isn’t it? Probably prepped yourself last night knowing you’d take cock. Doesn’t matter whose it is does it baby? Why should I even fuck you? Whores like you take anyone.” He jeers. Thumb dipping inside stretching your hole. Hips slowing to hit your clit with each drawback.
“Only..” you wheeze, coughing as another orgasm coils down your gut. Jeno playing with your bundles of nerves just right finally. Fat tip of his cock moving you side to side in delicious friction. “Only you..”
“What was that?” Jeno spits, landing another smack to your ass. Palm sliding up to your waist to control his rapid movements. Hip bones slapping fiercely against your bottom. Skin on skin echoing throughout the room too loudly.
“Only you! Only want you to fuck me! It’s all for you Jeno!” You shout breathlessly. Face lifting pressing your cheek to the mirror. Puffs of breath fogging up the area blurring your vision further. Jeno’s sinks two fingers inside your ass pushing his thumb deeper. Pumping digits in past your rim locking up around him. “Jeno!”
Your eyes roll back, waist dipping in arch. Knees slipping apart as convulses rake through your chest. Cunt milking at nothing, arousal trickling all the way down to your knees.
Jeno pulls out throwing arms around your stomach hoisting you up mid-orgasm. Back slamming into his tight chest with a struggled gasp. Wet cock sliding up between your ass circling your rim. Your body jolts, Jeno’s arm securing you in place. Other lifting up, grabbing your jaw, focusing your gaze to the mirror.
“Don’t fucking look away.” Jeno’s eyes burn in the reflection. The arch in his forehead adding to the underlying evil in his glare. Cock prodding at your hole wrinkling his brows together in concentration. With a bite to your earlobe he thrusts in filling you to the brim. Prepped or not it’d never be enough. He was too long, too thick, cockhead fat and wide. Jeno left you gaping for days just how you loved. A constant reminder of what a slut you could turn into for the right dick.
Your neck nearly drops on instinct, wind knocked right out of your chest. Ass clamping down on his cock deliciously earning a vibrating growl from Jeno’s chest. Lazy eyes meet his in the mirror pleading to fuck you hard. Teeth skim to the top of your jaw biting down. Hips rolling making space for his length.
“Nasty hole feels so good. Love how you always take me like nothing. Perfect slut ready to be bred and fucked at any moment.” Jeno whispers harshly against your jaw. Hips drawing back only to slam forward. Violent thrusts picking up from the start. Veiny forearm around your middle bulging with each impactful thrust. Intense temperature rising through your body with every press of Jeno’s body.
Jeno’s perfect every time, matching up to your level of filth. Surprising you the more you discovered about each other with each hook-up. Where you were hot he was cold, the equal balance to get each other off with no need for more. Learning the secrets you were only too timid to share turning him on even more. Biting at his nails before bed remembering the way you pissed on them like a sloppy whore. Too submissive and weak to even control yourself. Humiliation on your face opening new ideas in his mind of all the things he could do to you.
“Dirty little girl needs cock filling her ass everyday..” he babbles on. Fucking you too hard for any snappy retort. Brain rattling reaching peak emptiness. The veins along Jeno’s cock forming shape in your ass the only thing your mind can concentrate on. Fingers inch down to your core, Jeno’s bicep lowering under your bouncing breasts. Like slow-motion you watch his palm lift falling down in a loud smack on your mound. Hips jostling forward releasing a pained screech. Jeno grits, eyes crinkling shut, tongue tracing your ear whispering hotly- “Stupid slut likes her pussy slapped like that?”
Another hit has you screaming. Head nodding rapidly in his unrelenting hold. Dry eyes freshening up with wet tears. “Yes! Please please! Make it hurt please!”
Jeno groans, your ass viciously squeezing around him with each slap. Clit swollen in pain shooting bolts of arousal up your stomach. Jeno doesn’t slow, ass hitting his hip bones hard with each thrust. Palm landing on your wet pussy hard enough to splay splashes of your wetness on the mirror. Jeno moans, rubbing your folds under his thick fingers. Ear covered in his spit, whispering nonsense- “You’re so fucking nasty, you’re so fucking good.”
“O-oh fuck!” Crying out you cum stiffening in his hold. Cunt desperately seeking Jeno, ass clamped down forcing him to pause. Jeno’s thick neck falling back showing off every dip and vein. Impending orgasm nearly ripping free, pulling out with an embarrassingly obscene noisy pop. Jeno manhandles you onto your back. Body shaking beneath him, having to wrap a hold around the base of his length to not cum all over you.
“Jeno..” you sigh, stretching your legs open for him yet again. Pussy hurting, begging to be filled, hole sucking at air. He grunts spreading your folds open, finger tapping your entrance teasingly.
“Look at that pretty tight hole baby.” Jeno’s cute smile returns, only to mock you. Shoving your thighs up, the tip of his cock returning to your ass. Clicking his tongue in dismay. “Wish I could fuck a cute little pussy like that everyday.”
Jeno bottoms out into your ass with ease. Cock thrumming inside nearing release. Pussy untouched just to add further insult. He thrusts with ferocious pace. Chest glistening in sweat under the sunlight filling the room. Hair flopping in a mess with each piston of his hips. Small waist sucked in tight staving off his climax. He fucked hard, had to fill you with cum. Urgency building with every mercilessly slam of his hips.
He was close, craving another death grip around his cock before giving you a load of cum. His fingers sweeping your pussy side to side again. Arousal hitting your thighs under every aggressive motion. Jeno fucking your ass in time with each rub on your cunt. Clit over-stimulated, body going limp with exhaustion. Each thrusts sweet and deep, hitting just right. Filling every need to feel used and claimed. Two fingers squeezing your bundle of nerves causing your hips to jump. Holes grasping, arching up under another rush of intense orgasm. Jeno fucking right through your clenching rim. His forehead creasing in exertion. Balls full and heavy slapping against you with each seething thrust.
“Fuck!” Jeno shouts. Cock popping free leaving your ass wide. Fucking right into your pulsating cunt. He bends over holding onto the back of your neck. Cockhead kissing your cervix exploding, hot cum flooding your insides. Jeno’s body shaking through release causing your sweaty back to rub against the floor harshly. Intensity of his orgasm taking it out of both of you.
“You.. want it?” Jeno asks between ragged breaths. Both of you knowing exactly what he meant after the last time. A mortifying sensation washing over your face as you nod.
“Everything.” You plead, shutting your eyes. “Give me everything.”
Jeno’s slick cum covered cock pulls out. Seeping back into your ass hissing as hot fluid fills you up. Faces furrowing as he fills your ass with piss. Dick twitching in relief, he sighs. Eyes landing where your bodies connect, head shaking in disbelief.
“Fuck you’re so hot. Never gonna get over this..” Jeno thrusts experimentally. Liquid spilling out around his length to the floor.
A pool of cum and piss left behind as he slips out. Laying at your side with wide eyes, swallowing in amazement. He turns groaning, kisses up your arm. Body limp, weakly twitching in surprise.
“Honest question.” Jeno murmurs against your shoulder. Icky feeling of cum and piss under your ass has you shifting away. Rolling your body closer to Jeno’s. His arm draping around your back assuming you seek cuddles.
“What?” You ask more off his tone. Less concerned with what Jeno could be thinking. Craving a long shower, with his assistance of course.
“Are you going to start doing that boyfriend girlfriend shit with Jaemin now, or can we still keep doing this?” Jeno’s questions clear. A mild seriousness lingering in his words. You scoff slapping his pec.
“Quit being stupid, and give me a bath asshole! You really expect me to be coherent after you fucked my ass in two!” You demand. Pinching his nipple with a tough tug for emphasis. Jeno sits up smiling, scooping under your legs and back.
“That’s not possible, we have two butts already you know?” He stands on wobbly legs. Carrying you bridal-style off to his personal bathroom attached to his bedroom. Having fucked him in there one too many mornings after countless nights of sleeping over.
“You’re really lucky your hot. You know that right?” Your head shakes. Jeno agreeing with a laugh setting you down to start a bath.
genre: slice of life, husband! jaemin, general surgeon! jaemin, fluff, smut, a teeny tiny amount of angst
words: 20.9k
contains: some medical terms and procedures, minor character death, oral (m&f), fingering, nipple play, edging, drunk sex, sex toys, overstimulation, jaemin and y/n talking way too much during sex
synopsis: august, jaemin's favorite month of the year is around the corner again - the month of his birthday and his first marriage anniversary. thirty one days in august and unknowing to you, jaemin makes it a mission to make every single day special in the midst of both of yours busy life.
The concept of commitment, marriage, and the thought of starting a family terrified you for as long as you could remember. During the first year of college, you depended on caffeine and unremarkable one night stands. Second-year and a half, you thought you found the one when you dated Bae Jinyoung from your structural design class for a year till he decided to cheat on you. The third-year and you got back to the routine of hookups and casual flings, as regret washed over you every morning on a stranger’s bed.
Until one day, your friend Aeri dragged you out with her and you met eyes with the medicine student Na Jaemin across the table at the pub while passing a bottle of beer. That same man wrapped you around his fingers and you spent months trying to combat the constant dread of commitment before finally getting used to cuddling him to sleep at the apartment he shared with your mutual friend Jeno.
Now you were living the life of your dreams — a designer at an architecture firm, happily married, living in a high-rise luxury apartment where you got the view of the sunset through the bedroom windows with the love of your life and a cute white puppy and you couldn’t ask for anything more.
AUGUST 2
You looked up from your iPad and watched Jaemin come up behind you through the mirror — he wrapped his arms around your shoulders and rested his head on top of yours. A smile that matched his took over your face as he stared at your reflection fondly.
“Let’s go to bed,” he kissed the top of your head, “you’ve been working for hours now.”
You placed the iPad on the table while Jaemin’s head still rested on top of yours. “You look cute.” You snickered at his reflection and his smile faded into a frown. “What’s with the long face suddenly?”
“Am I not sexy?” Jaemin dramatically rolled his eyes. “My birthday is in, like what, two weeks. Cute isn't for me babe.”
“God, you’re so fucking old.”
“We’re the same age!”
“Let me have my moment, please.”
“Do I get to make, what do they say on the internet — milf jokes?”
You smacked his hands away from your shoulder and he dramatically clutched his chest which earned a giggle out of you. That was how most of your nights before bed are spent — joking around, gossiping about anything and everything, lazily staring at the Netflix screen, or just mind-blowing sex before falling asleep in each other’s arms.
“Are you done?” Jaemin pointed at the iPad.
“Done for the day, I guess.”
“You’ve been working too much.”
“I kn—
“Go to bed.” Jaemin pinched your cheeks. “I’ll turn off the lights and everything.”
You shook your head quickly. “Nope, it’s fine. I'll just wait for you.”
“You sure?”
“Positive,” you informed, pushing yourself up on your toes and pressing your lips to the corner of his mouth.
“I need to go to the kitchen to keep the cups and turn off the hallway lights though.” Jaemin gave you an apologetic smile.
You pulled your arms out from around him. “Shit, I forgot.” The fact that you both took turns to do these chores every night almost slipped out of your mind. “I thought you already did that.”
“Do you wanna go?” This time Jaemin wrapped his arms around your waist, before he leaned down to capture your lips with his in a kiss.
You kissed him back quickly, pulling away just enough to meet his eyes as you replied, “Yeah. Let me just-” the next moment he leaned in and his lips reached your neck, collarbone, bristly against the tender skin before going back to your lips again. Jaemin lightly pushed you, making you land on the bed and you shivered helplessly beneath him as his hands made their way under your silk nightdress while his lips still moved against yours. You pushed him off you quickly when you felt his length hardening against your thigh.
“Wh-”
“Go and turn off the hallway lights first before we do something.” You mumbled against his now swollen lips.
“Do what?” He smirked and placed a kiss on your forehead before getting up. Jaemin was definitely the same cheeky man you couldn’t resist and stop thinking about seven years ago.
“I’m gonna get my iPad and go back to working again.”
“Fine!”
Jaemin coasted through the typical bedtime routine of clicking the lights off in the hallway, checking on Yiseul to make sure she was sleeping peacefully on the couch, and then finally made his way back to join you in the bedroom. When he came back he immediately pulled his white shirt over his head and hovered above you, not hesitating to pull your dress up above your head as well.
You were panting, still coming down from that euphoric feeling of your orgasm. Jaemin’s hand reached out and pulled the comforter over the two of you and you turned your head to glance at your husband who just fucked you silly in the middle of the night.
“Are you sleepy?” Your husband whispered, snuggling closer to you and pressing a kiss on your forehead.
“Yeah,” You mumbled, gently nudging him in the chest and eliciting a chuckle out of him in the process. Jaemin drawed you as close as possible to rest his head against your bare chest.
“What’s so fun about putting your head on my tits?” You drawled followed by a chuckle.
“Shut up, this is comfy. You won’t get it.”
You two found yourselves lying in the dimly lit bedroom, his face resting against your chest. You were convinced your legs would feel like jelly in the morning and Jaemin just said sorry in between his giggles.
“What’s the time?”
“Hmm, let me check.” You glanced over your shoulder to take a peek at the alarm clock on the bedside table, the bold red numbers showing 2:41 AM. “Almost 3.”
“Fuck,” Jaemin groaned and started, his voice muffled. “Sihyun from the trauma center just went on maternity leave yesterday and I’ve got the task to cover her shift at the trauma center every Monday before my appointments.”
“Sihyun’s pregnant again?”
“Yeah again, she literally gave birth last September.” Jaemin scoffed, getting a reminder of the fact that it was almost 3 in the morning and he needed to be present at the hospital before 9 AM just to wander around the corridors of the trauma center — unless there was an emergency.
“You need to go to sleep.” You caressed his back lightly.
There was a comfortable silence. Even though it was impossible to lounge around like how you two used to at the small studio apartment every day, cafe hopping to the other side of the town 5 years ago — Jaemin still looked forward to this exact moment every single night.
“Do you want kids?” Jaemin blurted out, breaking the silence again. Na Jaemin, you're a fucking idiot. He thought and mentally punched himself for asking that impulsively, especially when you were naked in his arms in the middle of the night.
You've ticked all the boxes and overcame the fears you’ve had for years. Commitment? Check. Marriage? Check. There was only the concept of starting a family left at the bottom of the list and you never thought Jaemin would be the first one to subtly bring it up eleven months into your marriage.
You remained silent for few seconds, which concerned Jaemin enough to make him raise his head from your chest and look at you, “I was just jok—
“That’s actually a funny thing to ask right after putting your jizz inside me.” You cut him off. Your eyes followed the movements of his fingers on your arms which seemed to halt. “I’m kidding!”
“I really thought you were mad at me for a second, fuck.”
“To answer your question, I’ve thought about it once I guess.” You cupped his cheeks, “What about you?”
“Me?” Jaemin sighed in relief before continuing. “Yeah, maybe a girl.” He hugged you tighter underneath the comforter, bringing you closer as a stream of rain continued splattering on the window and then a bolt of lightning lit up the bedroom.
“That sounds nice.”
You chuckled at the way Jaemin nuzzled into the crook of your neck. He looked ethereal, the sight of him in the post-sex glow, disheveled hair as he implied that he wanted to start a family with you. You hated to admit it but that foolish smile of his suddenly made you forget about all those fears. Jaemin was the love of your life and if there was any doubt in your mind, they’d recede into surefire promises.
“I can’t imagine demons that happen to look like you running around the house.”
“You’re already thinking about it.”
“Yeah, you should knock me up.”
“Oh my god, wait—” Jaemin raised his head from your chest to look at you again. Your eyes widened when he started chuckling. “It’s gonna happen when it’s meant to happen. You’re the one who’s gonna give birth, not me.”
“I was just messing with you!”
“You’ve given me two mini heart attacks within the last five minutes.”
“Sorry…” You cooed and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek.
Jaemin was right but that didn’t stop you from overcoming your fear and you were certain he probably just planted a seed at the back of your head. Sure, you were not in any rush but the thought didn’t sound as terrifying anymore, not when you’d have to go through it with your husband.
“Go to sleep.” You took a peek at the alarm clock on the bedside table again.
“We should’ve just gone to sleep earlier…” Jaemin said through a yawn. “It’s raining and I can’t even sleep peacefully in the morning.”
“You started it.”
“Don’t point fingers at me now, you’re the one who wanted to ride my dick.”
“Fuck you, like seriously.”
Jaemin giggled, raising his head to catch your lips with his own in reply as he kissed you with passion, which you returned with enthusiasm. The kiss deepened as he was eager to thank you for every single thing you’ve done to make him feel special, appreciated, and loved. “I love you,” He whispered, suddenly overcome with the desperation to make sure you knew that in the middle of the night. “So, so much.”
You softly placed a kiss on his forehead. “I love you too.”
The next morning Jaemin immediately regretted staying up till 3 AM, being a sappy fool in love. Shoving a toast down his throat and barely getting the time to kiss you goodbye, he was late but at least grateful for the quiet environment of the hospital hallways. The quiet and cold hallways gave him enough time every morning to enjoy his caffeine in peace before heading into the trauma center for the day or wherever he was needed.
He sipped on his iced americano, praying that it kept him alive till the evening, and pulled his white lab coat over the light blue shirt, taking a look at himself in the locker’s tiny mirror beaming with pride. Jeno sat behind him, half asleep on the chair, mindlessly scrolling through his phone and sipping on his coffee.
“Our Doctor Na is late again,” a voice spoke behind Jaemin, which made him look over his shoulder. “Good morning, Jeno.” Donghyuck was standing at the door with his hands on his hips as Minjeong sipped on her coffee behind him. “This is his second time this week!”
“First of all, I’m exactly 5 minutes late.” Jaemin defended himself before returning to the mirror to fix the collar of his coat. “Second of all, this is actually my first time this week.”
“Leave the poor man alone. He’s not even that late.” Minjeong chuckled from behind Donghyuck and took a seat on the uncomfortable chairs the hospital had placed in these rooms.
“No, Minjeong, I need to know what his excuse this time is.” Donghyuck’s taunting made the three of them chuckle. “So, Dr. Na, what is it this time? What was it last time—
“Traffic.” Jeno interjected. “It was crowded on the streets, I don’t blame him.”
“Why are you both ganging up on me? Don’t you guys have a shift now?” Jaemin interjected to change the topic. He knew Donghyuck enough to know that he wouldn’t let this go till he got behind it.
“I’ll deal with my shift later.” Donghyuck shook his head. “Now, you tell me. Why are you late?”
“Why do you wanna know?” Both Jeno and Minjeong ask in unison.
“Jinx.”
“Because I’m nosy as fuck.” Donghyuck retorted curtly, making both Minjeong and Jeno exhale harshly through their noses hard as they masked their laughter. “Quick, I have got an appointment, Jaehyun’s gonna beat my ass.”
“Hyuck, you know, you’re too aggressive for a pediatrician sometimes,” Minjeong commented which earned her a death glare from Donghyuck.
“Na Jaemin, please…”
Jaemin shoots a terrifying glare back at her before quickly returning to face Donghyuck, who has a sweet smile plastered on his face. “I’m going to my ca—
Donghyuck interrupted Jaemin yet again, “Minjeong, and Jeno, are you thinking what I’m thinking.” He looked up and started examining Jaemin up and down. “This man fought with his wife in the morning.”
Minjeong burst out in laughter followed by Jeno and Donghyuck. Jaemin stood in the center of the room with his fingers on his temples, as the three laughed uncontrollably. “Guys, stop.”
“Wait, really?”
“No! Why would I fight with Y/N?”
“What is it?”
“Wait a damn minute,” Donghyuck squinted, coming closer to eye Jaemin’s neck. “Fuck, sorry for bringing up your—” He fake coughed, “fun activities at home.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?”
“Don’t you see the hickey? At least cover it up with your collar properly.” Donghyuck started taunting him while Minjeong continued laughing. “Minjeong, you won’t believe me when I say this. Jeno couldn’t sleep because of him and his girlfriend back then.”
"Who told you that?"
"Jeno did."
“Lee Jen—
“His wife or an ex?” Minjeong curiously interrupted Jaemin and Donghyuck looked like he was having the time of his life airing Jaemin’s business out early in the morning. Jaemin glanced back at Jeno who refused to look at him in the eye.
“Of course it’s Y/N, his high school girlfriend of 2 years dumped him 6 months into college.” Donghyuck remarked as Jaemin stood in the corner glaring at him in silence.
“Dude, you know way too much.” Minjeong furrowed her eyebrows. “How in the world do you know all these?”
“Jaemin told me himself.”
“Forget it,” Jaemin muttered and glanced at Jeno who was looking at him apologetically. He fixed his collar hesitantly, hoping that all of them, especially Donghyuck, would eventually forget about this incident and go on about their days. “It’s 9:25 right now.” He added, giving them a small reminder.
“I need to go!” Minjeong stood up suddenly, and downed her coffee before throwing the disposable plastic cup in the trash. “And Jaemin, please cover it up.” She warned before closing the door behind her.
“Goodbye, I’m leaving as well.” Jaemin gave Donghyuck a mischievous smile as he slammed the door shut, leaving Donghyuck alone in the room to clean up the table.
"You're not coming?'' Donghyuck asked Jeno.
Jeno stifled a yawn, "I have a surgery at 10:30, let me take a nap till 10."
"Don't tell me you were having sex asw-sorry!"
"Let me just nap."
Donghyuck shrugged and hurriedly threw away his cup, organized the table, and jogged down the hallway to catch up with Jaemin’s pace, gaining some confused looks from the interns and nurses who walked by. Donghyuck apologetically mumbled a few sorrys before catching up with Jaemin.
“You walk way too fast for my liking…” Donghyuck tried to catch his breath when Jaemin finally stopped in front of the elevators.
“Guess I have long legs.” Jaemin remarked with a sarcastic tone.
“Are you going to your chamber?” Donghyuck still huffed and puffed, trying to stabilize his breath.
“Nope, dialysis unit.”
“Oh.” Donghyuck hummed, the two of them slightly bowed when a small group of nurses passed by the two of them. “Were you actually being serious on Friday?” He added and Jaemin stopped in his tracks. He didn’t even know what Donghyuck was talking about but he surely blamed the influence of alcohol for blabbering in front of Lee Donghyuck out of everyone because now Lee Jeno and Kim Minjeong were probably aware of everything as well. Jaemin loved Donghyuck, he really did, but sometimes he wished his best friend knew how to keep his mouth shut.
“Oh.” Jaemin scratched the back of his neck. “About what?”
“Are you fuc—“ Donghyuck lowered his voice when the elevator door opened and a nurse walked out with a patient in a wheelchair. “You forgot?”
“I think so…” Jaemin mumbled and pressed the button to the 9th floor. “What did I say?” He looked at Donghyuck with a puzzled expression.
“You’re impossible.” Donghyuck groaned, making Jaemin chuckle lightly. “You were supposed to pay for my breakfast today. My beautiful wife had cereal for me today and I didn’t have it for you.”
Jaemin arched his brow. “Cereal?”
“Yeah, cereal. Got any problem with that?”
“Nope, absolutely not.”
“Don’t tell me you already had your breakfast…” Donghyuck glanced at him and his expression soured when he noticed Jaemin had started sneering. “I’m dragging you to the 12th floor anyways. I’m hungry as shit.”
“I have-”
“You’re paying.” Donghyuck pressed the button to the 12th floor with a scowl on his face.
“Fine.”
Donghyuck took his sweet time eyeing all the sandwiches and wraps through the glass. Jaemin on the other hand never understood why his coworkers seemed to be obsessed with the cafe at the hospital of all places. Sure, they had great americano which was enough to satisfy his caffeine fix for the day but he was never fascinated by the avocado egg sandwich which Donghyuck liked so much.
“You’re not having anything?”
“I already had breakfast,” Jaemin replied apologetically, and mentally he blamed the bottles of soju he downed after work on Friday. He wasn’t the best when it came to his alcohol tolerance and it wasn’t a surprise that he didn’t even remember telling that to Donghyuck. “Is Jeno coming?” Jaemin added.
“Right.” Sarcasm rolled off his tongue as he proceeded to order his regular avocado egg sandwich and pointed his thumb behind him at Jaemin when the cashier asked whether he would be interested to pay with cash or card. “Jeno has a laparotomy at 10:30, he said he was gonna take a nap till 10.”
Jaemin sighed and pulled his black leather wallet from his pocket to search for his credit card. His actions halted for a few seconds when his eyes fell on the picture of you from years ago, the one he always forgot to replace with a recent picture. It was a picture Jaemin took on your first anniversary — you had the biggest smile on your face, probably laughing at something stupid he had said. Curiosity got the best of Donghyuck and he peeked over his shoulder to see what Jaemin was eyeing so intently with a fond smile. Jaemin seemed to notice his friend snooping and he quickly pulled his card out, handing it over to the poor cashier.
“So, you’ve got a picture of Y/N in your wallet.” Donghyuck started as the two made their way to the back of the cafe, usually reserved for the hospital staff away from the patrons.
“You’re so nosy.” Jaemin rolled his eyes and unscrewed the cap of the water bottle he purchased for himself earlier. “I’ve had that picture for years now. I’m surprised you just saw it today.”
“I don’t go through people’s wallets.”
“Yeah, right.”
“Don’t you have surgeries today?” Donghyuck ate his sandwich and strolled across the floor to the dialysis unit area behind Jaemin, flashing a smile at an older nurse, “Wait, why are you here?”
“I have a cute little patient here, the curative surgery from last month. They had to shift her here for an emergency dialysis last night, her potassium levels kept rising.” Jaemin opened the door, greeting the nurses on duty followed by Donghyuck who did the same.
“Is it Son Jinah?”
“Hmm.” Jaemin hummed, “I’m kinda worried, her condition is slowly deteriorating every day.”
“There’s nothing we can do.” Donghyuck slowly patted Jaemin at the back. “I’m leaving then, thanks for the breakfast. I’ll pay for your lunch later!” Jaemin nodded in response and Donghyuck walked back out of the door, his silhouette visible on the frosted doors before he disappeared into the hallways of the dialysis unit.
Jaemin sighed and approached his patient, with the brightest smile on his face. He sat down by the bed and extended his hand to pat his patient on the head, trying to gain some attention from the seven year old girl named Jinah.
“Good morning. How are you feeling?” Jaemin gave her a sweet smile. He loved the children at the hospital, his colleagues often joked about how he treated them like they were his own children. Truthfully, it broke his heart to see them like that, he felt helpless. He hated watching vulnerable families in distraught every single day, knowing he couldn’t do anything.
Jinah was looking out of the window staring at the newly bloomed green leaves of the spring on trees right outside the window. Her ears perked up when she heard the voice of her favorite Doctor Na.
“Doctor Na! Good morning.” Jinah pouted. “I just finished having my breakfast, they gave me an apple today!”
“Did you finish eating everything?” Jaemin glanced at Jinah’s catheter on her neck and watched the blood flow through the two tubes which lead to the dialysis machine. Jinah just turned 7 years old a month ago, her birthday being celebrated at the hospital while she continues to suffer from leukaemia for 10 months now. Jaemin only met her recently when he was assigned to perform a tumor removal surgery on her.
“Yes, I did!” She kept nodding, making sure Jaemin saw. He quickly glanced at her and gave her a small smile before going back to skimming through her blood test reports. “They also gave me rice with seaweed soup and kimchi.”
“Good girl, I’ll come to visit you in the evening, okay?” Jaemin looked up from the files on his hand again and looked at her apologetically. “I’ve got work today, sorry.” He pouted.
“Promise you’re gonna visit later?”
“Promise!”
AUGUST 9
jaemin: baby are you still at work
y/n: im leaving in 5. packing rn
y/n: why
jaemin: do we have leftovers
y/n: we finished it all in the morning 😞
y/n: ill make fried rice later
jaemin: dont im stopping at the chinese
restaurant
jaemin: im getting spring rolls for
u aswell dont worry 🥺
y/n: oh i was just gonna tell u to
get spring rolls
jaemin: hah
y/n: love you
jaemin: love you too
Jaemin came home after you with a bag full of brown takeaway boxes and a bouquet of pink peonies again. Before you could interrogate him about the flower bouquet, he dropped everything on the kitchen countertop and ran into the master bedroom to change, only stopping to greet Yiseul on his way.
“What’s up with these flowers every other day?” You asked while dividing the spring roll portions and glanced at the beautiful pink peonies sitting on the other side of the counter. Jaemin almost didn’t pay attention to what you were saying at first because one, he hadn’t eaten the entire day, thanks to an emergency appendectomy right before lunch time and two, those wontons were too good. You were taking your sweet time picking through the box of wontons between you two on the countertop. “Where’s all this romance coming from?”
“Okay, let me explain.” Jaemin chuckled and put his chopsticks down on the plate. “There’s a new florist shop nearby— pretty and big. They got these descriptions and all beside all the flowers on display. And you like peonies anyway so I just buy them, it’s 2 minutes away from the hospital anyway.”
“But I don’t—
“You don’t like them?” Jaemin almost choked on spring rolls, you giggled and passed him a glass of water.
“You didn’t even let me finish,” you laughed, watching him stare at you in disbelief. “I do like peonies, I just don’t remember telling you. You always got me roses in college so I just assumed I never mentioned.”
“You told me once before we even started dating. I never got you peonies back then cause these flowers are fucking expensive. I only got you six stems on our first anniversary and that shit cost $60.” Jaemin raised his chopsticks and pointed at one of the takeaway boxes beside you. “Pass the chow mein.”
You passed the box and took a couple of bites from the wonton in front of you. Jaemin must’ve eaten nothing today, you thought, because he was devouring the chow mein in front of you like a starved man. “Why did you skip lunch today?” You suddenly voiced concern.
“How’d you know?”
“You just—I can tell.”
“I had an appendectomy today right before lunch break. A damn emergency surgery and I’m literally the only one free at that time.” Jaemin shoved another wonton into his mouth. “Then the scheduled appointments started again, I didn’t get time for lunch.”
“You could have texted me, I would’ve gotten the food on the way instead.”
“I had coffee if that makes you feel any better.”
“Are you fucking se— you know what, do whatever makes you happy.” You chewed down a piece of spring roll as you mumbled. “I just don’t want you to get sick two days before your birthday, you overwork yourself.”
“Ah, my birthday.” Jaemin put his chopsticks down again and scratched the back of his neck. “Fuck, I’m old as shit. I even forgot about my own birthday.”
“Fucking hell, I’m so worried about you sometimes. For someone who’s a physician, you really don’t give a shit about your own health.”
Jaemin chuckled lightly. “I’m fine. I should be the one worried about you. How was work today? I forgot to ask, sorry.”
“Just meetings and some construction sightings.” You sighed and set chopsticks aside, taking a sip of water before continuing. “I think my client Mr. Park didn’t like my layout. So, I’m just gonna redesign after we clean these up.”
“When’s the next meeting with Park?”
“Hmm, next week.”
“Then, you’re going to sleep early today. No questions asked.”
A sudden realization hit you like a truck. You were in fact married to Na Jaemin, one of the kindest beings you had ever met in your life. Despite majoring in two different subjects and classrooms five buildings away, Jaemin always made sure to walk you to your building every morning for your 8 AM lectures after both of your Starbucks runs. You were forever going to be grateful to your friends, Donghyuck and Aeri for forcing you out of the library one evening because you found both love and friendship in this man who is addicted to caffeine just like you, loved to cook and an avid shopaholic — it was still impossible to wrap your head around the fact that you were indeed married to your best friend.
You drew your lip between your teeth, almost sullen. “I just—
“Hmm?”
“Just…” You sighed and took another bite of wonton.
Jaemin put his chopsticks down and waited patiently but it looked like time had frozen for him until he got an answer out of you, something outside of fragmented stuttering. “Just..?”
“Jus— please don’t think I’m crazy.” You sighed again. “I can’t believe I’m married to you now. It’s just— I once told Aeri ‘I’m gonna marry this dude’ as a joke not even two months into dating because you walked me home in the rain.”
Jaemin laughed for the first time tonight, not a light chuckle but a sincere laugh. “You should’ve told me earlier that the bare minimum got you worked up like that. I wouldn’t have been running to the other side of the town to get you poké bowls every two weeks.”
“Don’t speak to your wife like that.” You threw the closest napkin you found around you on the countertop at him. “It’s your turn to do the dishes today.”
“Yes, I remember.”
“Good luck. I can help you with the mugs maybe.”
“Thank you wifey,” Jaemin winked, earning an eye roll from you in return as he started piling up the takeaway boxes on top of each other to dispose of them. “Green tea before bed today?”
“Sure.”
AUGUST 13
You woke up slowly to the sun shining faintly through the window and the sound of birds chirping outside. Slowly opening your eyes and looking at the alarm clock on the bedside table, the bright bold red numbers showed that it was 6:52 AM. Rolling over, expecting to see the birthday boy still fast asleep, you were met with the empty and cold side of the bed instead.
Your head felt heavy when you crawled out of the bed, however, a headache was the last thing to worry about right now— instead, you blamed the melatonin pill you took last night and started wondering where your husband might be. At first, you assumed it was an emergency from the hospital but that assumption was quickly refuted when you saw Jaemin’s phone charging on the bedside table. Walking out of the bedroom, you found both Jaemin and Yiseul in the kitchen. He was clad only in his grey sweatpants, and had his head bowed over a small mixing bowl as he stirred the contents inside along with a pot of coffee brewing on the counter. Yiseul on the other hand was basking in the sunlight near the window. You smiled at the sight, and leaned against the doorframe to watch but then it hit you — it was Jaemin’s fucking birthday and you had been making a mental note since the start of this month to surprise him with breakfast on bed.
“What in the world are you doing?" You asked, making Jaemin jump. “I was gonna make breakfast for you…”
Jaemin dropped the mixer and dramatically clutched his chest with his left hand. “Not even a happy birthday or good morning for me?”
You planned out an entire schedule for Jaemin’s birthday two weeks ago. Starting with waking up 40 minutes earlier than usual to replicate a heart shaped toast with eggs which you saw on Pinterest, pick up tiramisu on your way home from work because he isn’t the biggest fan of cakes and then finally a candlelit dinner later in the evening at a fine dining restaurant. You were so close to accomplishing the first goal before you walked out of the bedroom and saw Jaemin in the kitchen.
“Happy birthday, my oldie.”
"Good morning to you too.” He snorted, taking a peek at the clock on the wall. “You woke up early today, congratulations.”
Ignoring his snarky comment, you walked into the kitchen and placed a chaste kiss on his lips out of instinct. “Give me the bowl.” Jaemin shot you a look before you clarify, “It’s your birthday baby. I wanted to get you some breakfast in bed.”
“Y/N, we’re too old for that. Birthdays are only fun when you’re young, free, and 20.” Jaemin frowns softly, resuming to stir the pancake mixture.
“We’re in our late-twenties, not 60.” You hit him on the shoulders. “Besides, don’t you remember my 23rd birthday? We were drunk as shit and ended up fucking in the club’s bathroom.”
“Didn’t you also throw up on my bed later when I dragged you back to my place?” Jaemin reminisced about that night from 6 years ago. You nodded and a chuckle escaped his lips, “I started freaking out because, what the fuck do you do when your drunk girlfriend of only a few months throws up on your bed.”
“Baby, you just proved my point. Birthdays are amazing now.” A smug grin appears on your face, happy that you have won a silly argument. “Can you please pass me the bowl?”
“You’re supposed to let the birthday boy be happy and making breakfast for my wife makes me happy.” Jaemin gave you a cheeky smile. “Now leave the fucking kitchen.”
“Do whatever makes you happy, I’m not leaving.” You stood behind him and wrapped your arms around his bare torso from the back. You watched him pour the batter onto the greased pan and once he was on the waiting step of the process, you pressed a kiss to his cheek with a mumbled compliment on how good it smelled.
Jaemin’s shirt on you nearly covered the shorts you were wearing, and he recognized it as the one he took off before bed. He turned his head and you giggled at the attack of kisses on one side of your face.
"Weren’t you wearing something else last night?" Jaemin questions before turning around and flipping the pancake.
“Yeah, I changed after I finished working. You were already snoring by then.” You smiled and rested your head on his shoulder. “You didn’t notice when you woke up?”
“You were literally buried under the comforter, like a cocoon when I woke up.” Jaemin turned his head again to place a kiss on top of your head. “You need to stop staying up late every nigh—
“Just flip the pancake!”
"Or what?" He challenged.
"Or we’re gonna end up starving." You kicked at his leg as he continued laughing and turned to the fridge for fruits. Jaemin moved to the sink to rinse and slice them. You on the other hand took over the stove to flip the pancake.
"It’s done.”
“Y/N, wait a minute, let me make scrambled eggs as well.” Jaemin already has the eggs in a bowl as he whisks them with a fork. “We need to have some protein!”
“Here comes Doctor Na,” you laughed while arranging the plates on the table. “I’m not having eggs, I feel sick.”
“Why, what happened?” Jaemin’s eyes are widened as he looks at you in concern. “Are you o—
“Don’t. My head kinda hurts, it's probably the melatonin.”
“You never listen to me. I’ve been saying stop working late at night, it’s not worth i—
“Okay, okay!”
“I’m serious, Y/N.”
“I will, don’t worry.” You assured him and placed a kiss on his temple. “Life is so hard when you have a doctor at home.”
Your words elicited a chuckle out of Jaemin. You noticed the dark circles under his eyes, etching a permanent exhaustion into him you were so used to seeing. You wonder if he saw the same on your face too, especially recently since taxing clients have literally been dumped on you with a deadline.
Jaemin stood in the doorway to ICU near Jinah’s room, and he could already feel his lower lip tremble slightly at the thought of what picture would lay beyond the door, in the hospital bed. Jaemin was informed that Jinah had a stroke the night before right after entering the premises of the hospital and was immediately rushed to the ICU.
She looked so fragile, broken, and every bit of Jaemin started shattering into pieces. Jinah was currently unconscious; and he suddenly remembered telling her his birthday was today a week ago. A nurse brought Jinah to Jaemin’s consulting room one afternoon a week prior during his lunch break because she wouldn’t shut up about her favorite Doctor Na.
“Who’s that?” Jinah pointed at the small photo frame beside Jaemin’s computer in between the plants he always had on his desk. He curiously followed the direction of her sight and it was a picture of you and him from your honeymoon in Bali— both of you in sunglasses, smiling brightly under the sun.
“That’s my wife.” Jaemin grinned at her, who was sitting across from him in her wheelchair. “Isn’t she pretty like our Jinah?”
Jinah giggled, “I want to meet her one day when I’m not sick anymore!”
“She would love to meet you, Jinah. I already told her about you a few days ago!” Deep down Jaemin knew it was impossible when her condition kept getting worse every single day and he was ultimately met with his fears this morning.
Upon noticing Jinah’s family, Jaemin decided not to enter the room. He watched her through the window, an oxygen mask on her face, hundreds of pipes attached to her tiny, fragile body. The heart monitor continued to beep beside the bed — Jaemin knew there’s not much time left, that’s what everyone and the oncologist Kang Seulgi predicted. The cancer had already spread everywhere, resulting in ischemic stroke. Soon enough it will spread to her CNS and she will be gone.
“I just heard they might put her on life support if she doesn’t respond within the next 24 hours.” Jaemin flinched at the sudden familiar voice behind him which belonged to Jeno.
“When did you come?”
“Just now. I went to your room and you weren’t there.” Jeno shoved his hands into the pockets of his coat. “Yeseo at the reception said you might be here.”
“Yeah, I was about to leave.” Jaemin rested his back against the cold walls and looked at Jeno. “Is anyone looking for me? I left my phone in my room.”
“Yeah, kinda.” Jeno scratched the back of his neck. “Come with me.”
Glancing at Jinah one last time through the window, Jaemin followed Jeno out of the ICU unit. He was aware of the fact that he couldn’t do anything — it was a part of his job to say goodbye to these people at the end of the day and there was no point in sulking at that moment. He soon forgot about everything when he entered his consulting chamber and was met with Donghyuck, Minjeong, and a few other staff, surprising him with a small brownie and a few balloons. Remembering it was his birthday, he started looking forward to spending the evening with you instead.
After a long day, from a minor surgery to a woman hitting on him during a check up till she saw the ring on his finger — Jaemin was finally free and on his way to the restaurant texted him when suddenly he received a text from you. He pulled his phone out of his pocket when the car stopped at the red light to respond to the series of texts you had sent just now.
y/n: im so fucking sorry
y/n: im stuck with the
managers at a meeting
jaemin: oh
jaemin: do i cancel the
reservation?
y/n: i'm so sorry
jaemin: no it’s fine
i’m tired as fuck
jaemin: come home quick, ill
make fried rice and we can
watch a movie 😘
jaemin: i love you
y/n: i love you too i’m
so sorry
y/n: ive got your tiramisu btw
jaemin: just come home quickly
It’s 8:30 PM and Jaemin exhaled deeply before he made a short phone call to cancel the reservation at the restaurant. He drove home when it was nearing 9 while listening to his favorite playlist, placed the peonies he got for you in a white vase, got changed, cooked a small portion of fried rice for himself with whatever he found inside the fridge and waited patiently for you while slowly petting Yiseul on his lap in the dimly lit living room. The Netflix show on the TV only worked as a background noise as Jaemin forced himself to stay awake.
“Happy birthday,” A voice slowly whispered and Jaemin felt a pair of lips on his forehead. “I got peonies for you this time!”
Jaemin’s eyes slowly opened, and he yawned as he rubbed his eyes. “Oh, you’re home.” He stifled yet another yawn, “What time is it?”
“10:30 PM.” You said flatly. “Baby, I’m so sorry. I fucked up, it’s your bi—
“I’m actually glad we didn’t go out for dinner.” Jaemin interrupted and gave you a tired smile. “I’m way too tired today, I just wanna cuddle you to sleep.”
“Still, it’s your birthday…”
“Which I’m spending with you right now,” Jaemin placed his phone on the coffee table, next to two cups and a teapot. One of them is half full with green tea, while the other is clean and empty. “Get changed, I made chamomile tea again because it suddenly clicked that you had a headache.”
“Jaem—
“How is your headache now?”
“I took paracetamol in the evening, I’m good now.” You assured him.
“Sure?”
“Yes, I’ll be back in 10 mins!”
A random movie played on the TV, and the two of you were tangled up on your couch with Yiseul on the other couch, half-watching the show and complaining about how unrealistic this show was as you passed the box of tiramisu back and forth.
“Did you take lactaid?” You were always concerned about the poor man beside you, who happened to suffer from lactose intolerance yet decided to indulge in dairy every once in a while.
“I actually did,” Jaemin replied after shoving the last bit of tiramisu in his mouth, he paused to chew before speaking again. “I was having the chocolate ice cream we had at the back of the fridge earlier.”
“How was work?” You got up, leaving Jaemin alone on the couch, and made your way towards the kitchen to throw away the empty dessert box in the trash.
“Kinda— very shitty.” Jaemin heaved a sigh, “Jinah isn’t doing well, she’s at the ICU right now.”
“Fuck, what happened?” You stopped in your tracks behind the counter. He loved that little girl, as if she was his daughter. His eyes sparkled with joy every time he mentioned her randomly during dinner or showed you a selfie of the two of them.
“She had a stroke, I really don’t know much honestly. Forget it.” He said, a small smile spread across his tired face as he threw his head back on the couch. “The staff got me brownies today because I made a special announcement to not get cakes for me after Renjun’s birthday disaster.”
You gasped as soon as the words left Jaemin’s lips. “Fuck, let me get your present.”
“You didn’t have to get me anything,” Jaemin shot you a confused look, letting a small smile quirk at his lip as you continued to beam up at him.
“Of course I did...it’s just something little, I promise.”
Jaemin sighed at your explanation, rolling his eyes at your undisturbed excitement, and shook his head with a small laugh when you raised your eyebrows at him. He knew there’s no point in arguing with you.
“Just wait for 10 seconds, I’ll bring it out,” You smiled and planted a chaste kiss to his lips before scurrying away towards the bedroom. You rushed to your side of the closet, pulling the neatly wrapped box from behind the well-stocked row of clothes hanging inside the wide doors and putting the package behind your back as you shuffled back to the living room.
“Close your eyes.” You laughed, pouting at him when he gave you an annoyed look. “Please?”
You smirked when Jaemin complied, crossing his arms and relaxing on the couch as you made your way over to him. “What is it?”
“Jesus, you’re so impatient,” you plopped down on the couch next to him and placed the box in his lap. “Open your eyes!”
You held down another goofy smile when Jaemin opened his eyes, picking up the box in his lap and jokingly examining it. You playfully pushed on his shoulder and encouraged him to just get on with it, drawing your knees up to your chest to rest your chin on your bent legs as he tore the wrapping paper away. He wasted no time in opening the box, a fond smile taking over his features as his eyes scanned the black button-up shirt in front of him.
“Thank you, I love it!” Jaemin turned his head to look at you, leaning in to press a quick kiss on your cheeks.
“You might want to wear it and see if it fits you, I bought it online.” You casually replied, trying to hold down your thrill that threatened to ruin the actual surprise.
Jaemin followed your suggestion and pulled the shirt from the box, eyes narrowing when he noticed another box tucked underneath the clothing. “What’s this now?” He chuckled, making you let out your own giggle as he dropped the shirt on the couch to grab the real present.
“Just open it. I know you will love it.”
Jaemin gave you an incredulous look before slipping the lid off, mouth curling into an unbelieving smile as he pulled the silver necklace with two small rings as the pendant from the small cushion it sat on. “You didn’t have to do this, baby,” He stuttered, running the cold metal along with his fingers.
“Shh, you deserve it,” You quietly responded and felt your heart practically skip a beat when Jaemin turned his head to look at you. You watched as his fingers fiddle the clasp open and you understood his silent request when he held out the necklace to you.
“I love you,” Jaemin whispered, leaning in to capture your lips in a gentle kiss and pulling your hips further down against his. You sighed into the kiss when he suddenly picked you up and placed you on his lap and you flexed your fingers against his shoulders. He pulled away, the sweet moment almost ruined for you when his hands greedily squeezed at your thighs. “Any other surprises for me?”
“Actually, there are two more presents,” You smirked, letting your hands slide from his shoulders to rest against his chest. “One, for now, another one for tomorrow morning.”
“Morning?”
“I’m taking you out on a brunch date.”
“Understandable. What’s now then?”
“Oh trust me, you’re gonna love it.”
“Fuck,” Jaemin threw his head and replied back in a low voice, irises thinning as his pupils expanded with the implications of your suggestive words. “What could that be?”
“You’re gonna love it,” You innocently replied, scurrying out of his lap while holding down a smile when Jaemin seemed taken aback by your language.
“I think I know where this is going.” You ignored him and kept a heated eye contact as you got down on your knees, cursing the hardness of the floor under your knees that you knew would make you sore tomorrow.
“Fuck, okay.”
You decided to take the initiative of pulling his sweatpants down, considering it was his birthday after all, and tried to control your rapidly increasing heartbeat when you pulled the clothing down his legs. It makes your mouth practically water to see his half-hard cock in front of your face, wasting no time in wrapping one hand around his length to slowly pump along his shaft.
“Why are you staring at the ceiling?”
Jaemin hissed. “You’ve got my dick in your hands!”
“This isn’t anything new.” You laughed as you continued to slowly pump along his shaft. “I’ve been sucking your dick for the past 6 years!”
“I know…” His head snaps towards you with a glare. “How the fuck do you just stare at me when I’m going down on you? Be honest.”
“It’s hot.”
“A freak is what you are.”
“I wasn’t the one buying shit like nipple clamps and vibrators.” You shot back at him, making him raise his head from the couch to look at you.
Jaemin waved his hand around in defense, “It was experimental and you liked it!”
“Yes I did, shut up.”
“No, you shut u—” Jaemin’s breath hitched and his head lolled back as you took him in your mouth, swirling your tongue around the head of his cock. His hips thrusted forward involuntarily, pushing him further into your mouth, and you braced yourself on his thighs.
Jaemin hissed out a few curses, and his hands found themselves in your hair, his fingers gently running through them. Your eyes flicked back up to see his chest heaving and he used his hand to gather your hair away from your face, allowing him to see exactly what you were doing — even though he was being bashful about it earlier. You kept your eyes on him as you got to work, pulling away for a brief second just to drag his sweatpants a little further down his legs to give you better access.
Setting up a steady rhythm, you used a hand on the rest of his cock, slicking it with your saliva, before sliding down to play with his balls. You loved the feel of him which was very familiar to you by now. This wasn’t the first time you’d lovingly traced every inch of him with your tongue. But it never got old, and you could never get enough of him.
Admittedly, you would love the feeling of him even more somewhere else and you clenched just thinking about it. But right now this was more than fine, and you lost yourself for a moment, forgetting that you two were in the living room rather than the bedroom where you preferred to perform these activities. All you focused on was Jaemin; his taste, his scent, concentrating on using your tongue and breathing through your nose, letting the swelling head of his cock hit the back of your throat. Jaemin’s breathing grew harsher, his body tensed like a coil ready to spring, and you knew he was close. The hands in your hair clenched tighter, and you sped up, bobbing up and down on his cock with deliberate movements, moaning around him.
“Y/N…” Jaemin’s voice was strained and you knew that was his warning that he was close to his release. When he did, it was powerful, his body jerking forward, his cock hitting the back of your throat again as he spurted his release in hot waves. You kept your mouth on him, swallowing every last drop as best you could, still watching his face.
Jaemin looked ethereal– his head thrown back in pleasure, his mouth open wide in a silent moan, all those muscles in his arms flexing and straining. He was still holding your hair tightly, but slowly his hands unclenched to smooth out your hair.
When he finally relaxed, you pulled away from him, delicately wiping your mouth and licking your lips. Jaemin opened his eyes and gently cupped your cheek, a sated grin on his face.
“What?” You locked eyes with him as you shifted onto his lap, smoothing your hands down his shoulders after you had secured it and holding in a breath when his hands settled on your mostly bare thighs - the lacking fabric of your shorts mixed with the position not leaving much to the imagination when you were practically dripping on his lap.
“How did cum get on my t-shirt?” Jaemin pointed at the white stain near the hem of his black t-shirt.
You wiggled your brows, “I wiped my hand on it.”
Jaemin gave you that look which made you giggle for a second before leaning in to capture your lips in a kiss, tasting himself and pulling your hips further down against his. You moaned into the kiss and pulled away when his hands unashamedly trailed over to your ass. “You’re so beautiful…”
You teased him. “Don’t be sappy now. I had your dick in my mouth not even two minutes ago.”
“Why do you ruin everything…” Jaemin trailed off when you pulled your t-shirt over your head, throwing it somewhere behind you in the living room. You were glad you had chosen to forget your bra after changing earlier. Excitement and arousal coursing through your body as you settled on his lap, legs resting around him. You used your arms to push your tits together while staring at Jaemin with mock innocence in your gaze, feeling a sense of pride when his cock twitched against your clothed core at the sight and taking it as a sign to resume your activities.
“Bedroom.” Jaemin shot back in a low voice, irises thinning as his pupils expanded.
“Can’t you just put your dick inside me here?” You shifted on his lap against his lap, hoping that the slight friction will make you feel at ease.
“Nope,” A sly grin crossed his face and you suddenly yelped when Jaemin stood up on his feet and picked you up bridal style to carry you to the bedroom. When your back hit against the cool mattress Jaemin immediately pulled his shirt over his head and hovered above you, and you knew the night just began. Not that you were complaining, it was his birthday after all.
AUGUST 14
The morning light filtered into the room, soft and warm. Enough to wake Jaemin up before the obnoxious alarm went off. The sunlight was almost blaring at him through the curtains, sunshine much brighter than it was through the thin white curtains of your shared bedroom — though the blinds are partially closed.
Trying to not wake you up beside him, Jaemin sneaked away from your arms for a quick trip to the bathroom followed by quietly opening the closet to grab the first pair of sweatpants he could find. You groaned and moved a little from the rustling, but weren’t phased by how he had to move away from the tight grip you had around your waist even in your sleep. Jaemin smiled to himself when he heard you continuing to snore lightly.
He made his way under the warm covers after wearing his sweatpants and back to you as he crawled over your body to wrap himself around your left side carefully. Jaemin’s lips brushed against your forehead in a feather-like kiss, before he settled back in and laid there to admire you.
You looked so peaceful to him, taking even breaths of air, letting out quiet snores through your partially opened mouth, and completely bare of any clothes. You stirred briefly, unconsciously cuddling closer to Jaemin. His eyes fell on the diamond wedding ring glimmering on your ring finger against his chest. The movement made your hair tickle against his nose, the scent of the shampoo you used a little stronger than before.
Jaemin laid like that for some time, drowsing happily while the person he loved the most in the world slept beside him. He’d have to wake you up eventually, if you didn’t do so on your own, but for the moment, he was content to stay like that, it was the weekend after all. You stirred again, sooner than he’d think you would.
"Morning.” Jaemin started, as he apologetically watched you yawn into your palm. "Did I wake you up?"
"Not really, I did hear you close the bathroom door.” You snuggled up to him, lying your face against his chest before smooching him on the cheek. When you slid your thigh up to lie on top of his left, he gave you a comforting kiss on the very top of your head. You loved the weekends, when you both had the time to bask in each other's body heat as you laid in silence in each other’s comfort without thinking about getting out of bed.
You lazily opened your eyes and it was too much for Jaemin to resist. He kissed you again, brief at first, and then kissed you again, and again, barely giving either of you a chance to breathe. It woke you up the rest of the way, and you responded with kisses of your own, though your shoulders shook with barely contained laughter.
You made a face at him, rolling your eyes in fond exasperation, and tried to pull away from him. His arm tightened around you, holding you firmly against him. “Last night wasn’t enough for you?” You gasped and chuckled when Jaemin rolled on top of you.
Jaemin passionately kissed you and pulled away to say, “It’s never enough.” His hardening length was poking at your thighs. One of your hands stayed at the nape of his neck, tickling the tiny hairs, while the other hand ran down his side and back to his hip.
You bucked your hips up to grind against him. You took your hand from his hip and placed it on the bulge through the sweatpants. Jaemin melted in your touch. He couldn’t get close enough and wanted more of you. You removed your hand and placed it around his neck, pulling his lips in for another kiss. He rolled his bulge against your bare pussy, relishing in the friction.
You felt his hot breath on your neck. He sucked on the skin, leaving marks for him to admire later. You removed his grip from your tits and guided his hand to your pussy where you needed him the most and your breath caught in your throat when you felt his fingers on you.
Jaemin’s finger found your clit and rubbed soft circles before sliding his finger down to your slick entrance. He wasted no time curling his finger to find your sweet spot. He loved to watch you cum undone beneath him. Jaemin added another finger to your wet pussy. He pumped them in and out at a rapid speed, “Oh my god, Jaem—” and you breathed out when he pulled out.
“What the fuck? I was gonna cum!”
“Damn that sucks.”
“It’s not gonna suck anymore when I make myself cum and just fall asleep while you’re gonna get blue balls.”
“Shhh, have some patience.” Jaemin wasn’t ready to give you what you wanted and you absolutely hated his habit of teasing you during sex. You felt the wetness on his fingers when he touched your legs. He placed both of his hands on your thighs and slowly, moved them up your body till they found their place on your hardened nipples, he took one of the buds in his mouth and his tongue started moving in circles around them. Jaemin softly pinched your nipple with his fingers and while his mouth was busy on the other. He kept his eyes glued to yours as he brought his other hand down to your pussy. He didn’t waste any more time before inserting the two fingers back into your hole while his mouth still worked on your nipples simultaneously. Your mouth widened, but a gasp was stuck in your throat.
“Are you close, baby?” Jaemin pulled away from your nipple with a pop sound and his lips moved against the skin of your neck. You didn’t have the ability to respond and you opted to nod instead.
Jaemin slowed his movements, and you groaned in frustration underneath him. He wasn’t wrong. Your walls pulsed around his fingers and you needed a release. “Don’t kill me.”
“Na Jaemin…this is the second fucking time.” You breathed out. “I’ll scream if I don’t get to cum within the next 2 minutes.”
“Don’t scream at 6 in the morning!”
“You’re so fucking annoying, let me just cum then!” You tested Jaemin for a moment, but when he started to pull his fingers out, you knew he wasn’t playing. “Wait, Jaemin. Don’t do that.” You kissed him just below the ear and you were satisfied because Jaemin gave in immediately when you gave him that look. His fingers moved inside of you again, quickly. His thumb was back on your clit. “Cum for me, baby.” He growled and that was enough for you.
Your back arched as you finally came around his fingers and your whole body shook. Jaemin took the moment to kiss you while feeling you cum undone. He took in the moans and kissed you through your orgasm. When your body finally relaxed, Jaemin lifted himself up to kiss you passionately again.
“Don’t wipe your hands on the bedsheet like last time.”
“I didn’t do that intentionally!”
“I don’t care, I still had to do that laundry!”
“Whatever.” Jaemin dramatically rolled his eyes and shifted onto his knees. “Can I…?”
“Can you what?” You looked at him with a confused expression. He discarded his sweatpants somewhere in the room and hovered above you, slowly stroking his cock as he kept his eyes fixated on you. Your eyes darted to his cock. “Are you asking if you can put your dick inside me or what?” You asked and Jaemin nodded while you tried and failed to hold in a laughter. “We’ve had sex so many times and you’re embarrassed to ask if you can stick your dick in me?”
“Yeah,” Jaemin shook his head. “It’s called being polite!”
You laughed and kissed his jawline as your fingers wrapped around cock. His precum was slick against your fingertips and you slowly picked up your speed. You listened to how disorganized his breathing had gotten. He jerked his hips up into your fist. His cock felt hard and hot against the palm of your hand. You gave his cock one last squeeze before Jaemin’s hand grabbed a hold of your wrist. It was such a fast movement that it startled you for a moment. He brought his legs up and pushed your hand off of his cock. “Shit, stop, stop.” His voice was weak. “I’m gonna cum.”
Jaemin rolled over on top of you. “Put your legs on my shoulders.” He guided you into the position. He took his stiff cock in his hand before thrusting it into your wet pussy. He pushed it in with a deep groan. His balls hit your ass with every thrust and the two of you knew he wasn’t going to last long, he just wanted to cum inside of you and you wanted it too.
“Oh, fuck, Jaem.” You moaned as your fingers circled against your clit. You clenched around his cock and Jaemin came undone. He held back his moans in his throat as he spilled his seed inside of you. The groans that did escape his lips were music to your ears and sped up the process of your next orgasm. He slid your legs off of his shoulder and pulled out of you just as you came, causing his cum to spill out of you as well. You let out a quiet giggle when you seemed to have calmed down.
Jaemin suddenly felt a little self-conscious. “Why are you laughing?”
You turned over, tangling your legs with his. It was sweaty, but he pulled you closer anyway. You kissed him on the lips. “Nothing. I just love you.”
He wrinkled his brows, “And you think that’s funny?” He couldn’t help but let out a breathy laugh as well.
“No,” You smiled. “It makes me really happy.”
Jaemin smiled back, not that you saw the smile for long as your tired eyes drifted shut and you scooted down in the bed to lay your head on his chest. He kissed the top of your head, his mind feeling bombarded by the sense of unconditional love.
He sighed, squeezing your forearm, “We should get up.”
“It’s the weekend, baby.” You disagreed. “I’m not leaving the bed before midday.”
“Yeah.” Jaemin gave in, “but let me set an alarm for 10. It’s my turn to walk Yiseul today.” He moved above you to grab his phone from the nightstand. When he finally got under the covers again, you listened to his heartbeat until it faded somewhere while you drifted off to sleep.
AUGUST 17
A fatigued Jaemin entered the condo and the aroma immediately reached his nose. The sight of you cooking in the kitchen while Yiseul played with a soft toy on the floor was enough to make him forget about the dreadful day he had at the hospital earlier. You were in the kitchen, your back facing him and Jaemin was sure you were not aware of his presence yet due to the AirPods in your ears.
"Oh, you're home early today! Get changed quickly, I'd prefer if you shower first," you spoke, chopping a cluster of vegetables.
Jaemin stopped in his tracks, he wanted to surprise you with a back hug and he also got a bouquet of peonies on his way home. Jaemin usually stayed back at the hospital till 7 PM every day, monitoring the in-hospital patients and having meetings about their well-being with their beloved families. Today, nonetheless he was let go at 5 PM right after a successful surgery, thanks to the new resident, Park Jisung. “How’d you know I came, I was being qu—oh my baby there you are.”
You could hear your pet dog, Yiseul, barking – she loved Jaemin, and wouldn't let him into the apartment without him petting her. His voice resembled a kindergarten teacher’s voice as he crouched down and greeted the animal.
“All this love after insulting her last night?” You quipped while washing up the chopping board.
“Don’t accuse me of shit I haven’t done.” Jaemin sat on the floor to pet Yiseul, “Right? I’d never insult you.” He cooed in front of the animal as if she could understand what he was saying.
“Whatever floats your boat!”
Jaemin stood up on his feet and walked behind you to grab a vase from one of the cupboards. He removed the fresh-cut pink peonies from the crinkly brown paper and started arranging the florals in the vase before placing them on top of the marble counter.
"What are these for again?" Your mind started wandering to different directions and you solely blamed the workload for that.
"Try to guess?" Jaemin smirked and took a few steps closer.
"Just say it, I'm wondering whether it's a special day today or not.”
Jaemin smiled, and it made his eyes crinkle at the edges. "You’re beautiful."
"Shut up,"
"What? It’s true." He hugged you from behind, wrapping his arms around your waist and squeezing you a little. You let out a squeal and laughed. “Y/N," Jaemin mumbled, "You still didn't guess what these are for," he whispered and kissed your neck.
"I can't. I've had a busy day at work, meetings were crazy today.” You confided. Jaemin was stubborn, you knew that the second you saw him across the table for the first time. He wasn't letting you go any time soon if you hadn't mentioned work. “Just say it.”
"No reason, I just felt like it." He murmured and nuzzled into your neck. “I see them in front of the shop while leaving the hospital and I just get them.”
“Thank you.” You faced him and pinched his cheeks, “How was work?”
"The same old shit," Jaemin let you go and started munching on the carrots you just kept in the bowl after slicing them. “Jinah suddenly asked about you today, called you pretty and all.”
“Who?” You remember Jaemin rambling about someone called Jinah a few nights ago but you were way too drowsy to register what he was saying and instead opted to hum along with him till you fell asleep in his arms. “Sorry, I probably forgot.”
“A kid at the hospital, she has cancer. I did her tumor removal surgery and now we’re like…friends. She likes me a lot for some reason.” You could almost hear the excitement in his voice. “I go visit her every evening, and she suddenly asked about you today.” Jaemin pulled his phone out of his pocket, “Look, this is her.”
Jaemin’s phone screen displayed a selfie of him with a cute little girl, both of their smiles were so bright you almost didn’t notice the tubes and bandages attached to her small body. “She’s cute, isn’t she?”
“Hmm, she is.” You nodded. “Tell her I called her pretty as well!”
Jaemin shook his head in reply, “Anyways, anything interesting at your work today?”
“Nope, just designers being a pain in the ass. Jisu spilled coffee over her sample work, that's the most that has happened today.” Just as you finished talking your breath hitched, Jaemin was trailing wet kisses down your neck. “Jaem, not now.”
He chuckled and rested his head on your shoulder from the back, “it smells good, what are you cooking?”
“You’ve been here for at least 5 minutes now! You don’t know yet?”
“I was talking to you, how would I know…” He smiled sheepishly and kissed you on the cheek.
You smacked his shoulders, "Remember the tubs of kimchi mom sent? We still have those.” Scooping a little of the soup out of the pan, you blow on the spoon and hold it out to Jaemin to try. "What do you think?"
"Mm, that's good," He said. Your face breaks into a smile, stirring the pot again.
"I called your mom for the recipe this afternoon, you know how my one always gets salty. And for dessert—
"You, I hope." Jaemin’s eyes were twinkling with merriment, but there was a heat there that you knew all too well.
"Ew, I hope you didn’t forget that I’m on my period.” You scrunched your nose in disgust and Jaemin laughed again.
“I actually didn't. I got you your chocolate covered strawberries and new tampons.”
“You did?”
“Yeah, it’s on the ta—
“I love you!”
"Give me a kiss then." Jaemin said, leaning closer, "You know, you haven't given me one yet."
"I can play hard to get."
His hand on your waist suddenly tightened and he picked you up, placing you onto the counter. "You were playing so hard to get."
"Cause you only wanted me for my pussy." You snorted as your legs wrapped around his waist.
“N—that’s half true." Jaemin stuttered, a faint blush appearing on his cheeks. You cupped his face in your hands as you kissed him deeply. “I did only want to get my dick wet first, I’ll give you that.” He mumbled against your lips.
“I knew it!”
“I—we’ve got rings on our fingers now!” Jaemin started waving his hand around in defence, desperately shoving the white gold ring on his ring finger onto your face. “You’re stuck with me forever.”
“I’m aware.” You were trying so hard to not burst into laughter especially when Jaemin was whining in defence like that in front of you.
"Don’t make me feel bad now." He suddenly started pouting. You broke into a smile and kissed him again, feeling warm, strong, and like home. “Yeah, I just wanted to get laid at first but I really, really liked you…”
You gave him another kiss on the lips. “I love you.”
"I love you too wifey.”
“Now let me go before the rice sticks to the bottom of the rice cooker. And you,” you pointed at him with your index finger, “Take a shower. I'm not letting you anywhere near the food before that."
“Yes ma’am!” Jaemin walked away from the kitchen while nodding, processing all the commands you were giving him. He crouched down to pet Yiseul again, “Y/N, do you want me to run a bath for you after I’m done showering?” Jaemin asked from the living room.
You smiled and nodded along in response. A bath sounded great after the long day you had at work.
“The lavender bath bomb, right?”
“Yeah! That one, thank you!”
AUGUST 19
It was a Thursday and you were having the worst day a person could possibly have — you wouldn’t even wish it upon your worst enemy. The heels were uncomfortable on your feet and without a doubt you were sure it would leave bruises on your ankles. To make things worse than it could possibly be, you woke up with a nasty headache which turned into the need to empty your stomach at 5 in the morning.
Jaemin hugged you close and assured you it was due to overworking yourself and staying up past midnight the last two weeks. He sat on the edge of the bed while massaging your feet and explained how stress can cause nausea, suggesting you to call in sick today.
“I wish I could. There’s a workshop today.” You grumbled against the pillow and he continued to massage your feet sympathetically. “This stupid project,” You rolled over to look at your husband. “Jaemin, I’ll literally take a week off after this shit is over just to sleep 24/7.”
“You deserve it more than anyone right now.”
The glass of your desk caught the reflection of your tired face cleanly. You silently played with the spoon sitting inside the cup of a strawberry probiotic yogurt you got from a convenience store 2 minutes away instead of having the chicken rice bowls they were serving downstairs during the lunch break.
The door to your cabin cracked open as Gyeoul peeked her head in with her mouth full, “You’re not coming for lunch?” She entered with her bowl of rice when you shook your head and sat on the chair across the table. The aroma of the food she was devouring almost made you feel nauseous again.
“You’re on a diet?” Gyeoul questioned, eyeing the yogurt cup.
“Nope, I just don’t feel like eating.”
“Are you okay?”
“Not really, I’ve got a massive headache.”
“Kim talks too much right?” You frowned at the mention of your boss, remembering how talkative of a person he was. The workshop was going smoothly till he decided to start , along with yours and you were convinced that contributed to your already throbbing head.
“Yeah,” You nodded and watched a grin forming on Gyeoul’s lips who seemed to agree with you as well. “I’ve actually had this headache since the morning but Kim blabbering just gave it a boost.”
“Is our Y/N perhaps pregnant?” Gyeoul wiggled her eyebrows in an attempt to crack a very unfunny joke. You forcefully laughed along with her while shaking your head and hands in an attempt to deny the accusations. “I’m joking! You’ve been working a lot nowadays. It’s the stress, it happens.”
Spooning at your yogurt, you ignored her and continued, “Can I ask you something?” Mentally you slapped yourself for thinking about breaching such an intimate question suddenly.
Gyeoul paused for a second, her mouth agape. “Wait, are you actually pregnant?”
“No, what the fu—I apologize for my language. Let me know if this feels too personal though.”
“Okay?”
“Yeah. Don’t worry, I’m just—” Running your hands through your hair, you sit up straight and toss out the rest of your yogurt cup in the bin at your feet. “I feel like actual shit since Friday morning, you know, nausea and headache.”
Gyeoul shot you a flat look. “So, you are pregnant? Those are some early pregnancy symptoms.”
Undaunted, you continued, “Nope, I’m not. I’ve been on the pill for years.”
“Did you take a test or miss your period?” Gyeoul inquired, “You know, pills aren’t effective all the time, right? Your husband is a doctor, you should know that.”
You were slightly taken aback by her snarky remark directed towards you and Jaemin as well you supposed. Your expression probably read offended now but you forced a smile and continued, “Yes, I’m aware. I don’t need my husband to know that.”
“Does your husband know?” You were starting to feel like Gyeoul was mocking you now.
“He knows about my headache, yes.”
“I'm not a gynaecologist but you should take a test,” Gyeoul suggested.
You shifted in your seat and replied, trying not to sound bitter, “Yeah I will.”
“The workshop resumes in 10 minutes.” Gyeoul shoved a spoonful of rice in her mouth and with that she stood up on her feet and exited your room, leaving you with thoughts you didn’t want to have and a pile of unfinished designs which have been killing you slowly for weeks.
y/n: are you free
jaemin: surgery in 20 mins baby
jaemin: ill call u later
y/n: okay love you
jaemin: love you too
y/n: no emoji today? :(
You sent him the text and went on with your day, forgetting about the whole conversation with Gyeoul as the workshop and designs occupied your entire afternoon and evening. However, you checked your phone after 5 hours and the messaging app on your phone showed that Jaemin still hadn’t read the last text you sent. It wasn’t unusual for him to not read texts for hours, there have been days when you texted him in the morning and he would reply in the evening. You let it slide and resumed working on your landscape design for a client again.
7 PM and you haven’t heard from your husband in hours. You sighed, knowing that Jaemin could sometimes be a slow responder if he had surgery. Yet, a tiny kernel of worry was in the back of your mind. Upon entering the apartment, you called out his name, just in case he had come home early, the chances being quite unlikely given his incredible work ethic. Instead, you were met with Yiseul who came running towards you. You put your files and the small plastic bag containing a few cans of beer from the convenience store on the marble counter after petting Yiseul for a while, and sent him another text.
y/n: i’m home now where are you
After a moment, when your heart did the telltale lurch of worry, you resolved to keep yourself busy and do some light tidying around the apartment, take a cold shower and even a power nap on the couch to occupy those intrusive thoughts you couldn’t stop. When you finally decided to call Donghyuck, you reached for your phone and dialed his number, lifting it to your ear, listening to the constant dialling sounds until you were left with Donghyuck’s voicemail — the same as Jaemin.
Placing the phone down on one of the couches, you paced around the apartment, chest beginning to heave a bit deeper as your mind raced with horrible imaginings and the dreaded question of 'what if?'
At 11 PM, after another agonising wait of an hour and 40 minutes, consisting of mindlessly scrolling through your phone, there was a sound of the door unlocking and you very nearly rocketed off to the moon. Yiseul on the other hand, excited to see her favorite human at the end of the day, jumped off the couch and ran towards the door as well.
The door opened and in walked Jaemin, still in his white coat. 'Where were you?” You asked rather harshly, which you realized after the words slipped out of your mouth. “Have you checked your phone?”
Jaemin didn’t speak as he continued to take off his socks, almost pretending like you weren’t about to go ballistic in front of him. You took the deepest breath possible, and asked quite softly this time, "Where have you been? I called Donghyuck and got no response a—”
“Hello, my baby,” Jaemin mumbled, crouching down to hug the white, fluffy dog. The person who was always vibrating with joy was now speaking stoically in front of you. You took in his expression when he stood up, watching his tired face, the eyebags, and impulsively let him bury his head in your shoulder before inquiring any further. “Can I get a hug from you?”
“What happened?” He immediately engulfed you in a tight, tighter than he has ever hugged you. Your voice was muffled against his shoulder and you felt his shoulders shaking gently as you ran your hands down his back. The temptation to start screaming at him from earlier replaced with concern, "Are you okay?"
“Jinah passed away.” Jaemin looked at you for the first time tonight, the dark circles under his eyes more evident than usual. “I should go get changed.”
You were at loss for words after he spoke. Everything was as clear as the day to you now — Jaemin was practically attached to Jinah, he would bring her up every time he’d get the chance with a fond smile, showed you selfies he took with her every other day and loved sharing anecdotes about her. Your voice trembled despite you trying to keep it together, heart sinking deeper and deeper into your stomach by the second as you looked at his sorrowful face. “How—what happened?”
Jaemin continued to pet Yiseul, who was wagging her tail, happy to be in between two of her favorite humans after hours. “Internal bleeding, we had to perform a laparotomy in the morning and she just—” Jaemin’s voice cracked at the end, his own eyes watering. “I was in charge and she just—
“She’s in a better place now.”
“Why am I even crying?” Jaemin let out a weak laughter while wiping his tears. He hadn’t wanted to fall apart, but it was a long time coming. He watched her take her last breath — the same cheerful child was lifeless in front of him. Jaemin couldn’t look at Jinah’s family in distraught when the new resident Park Jisung informed them outside the operating theatre. A tear rolled down Jaemin’s cheek and he started, “I know it’s my job-”
“Surgeons have feelings just like everyone else. It’s okay to cry.” You wiped his tears with your hand and tried not to start crying as well, knowing that it would make his situation worse. Jaemin rested his head on your shoulder and let it all out, slightly staining your shirt with his tears in the process.
“I love you.” He mumbled against your shoulder. “Sorry, this isn’t like me. You know I don’t cry.”
“You cried on our wedding day though.”
“Stop bringing that up…” He chuckled through his tears and cupped your cheeks. “I don’t know what I would do without you.”
You let out throaty laughter and kissed him on the cheek which made Jaemin chuckle through his tears as well. “Go take a shower.”
Jaemin seemed to calm down after a warm shower, a bowl of instant ramen that you cooked for him and playing around with Yiseul in the living room. He comfortably laid on his back while you were resting your back against the bedpost. “I thought about something while showering.” He paused and looked at you. “I’m coming home to my family, everyone at the hospital is but Jinah’s family? They’re going to be grieving for days, maybe even years. She was their only daughter.”
“That’s just how fate works.” You replied slowly, running fingers through his locks. “There’s nothing we can do about that.”
“I know, it sucks.” Jaemin nodded and his lips quivered into a smile when he rolled over to look at you. “I took a day off tomorrow, more like, Jaehyun forced me into taking one.”
“You need to spend the entire day just sleeping like a baby.” Jaemin laughed when the words left your lips, making you gaze at him with a confused look. “What?”
“Nope, I’ll clean the house, cook for us, go to the park with Yiseul.” He paused to give you a sheepish smile, “I can’t make breakfast though, sorry. I’m not leaving the bed before 10.” You chuckled after he finished listing everything he wanted to do tomorrow. Leaning over, you wrapped your hands around Jaemin's chest tightly and you never wanted to let go. The scent of his cologne flooding your senses, the warmth of his touch, the calming sound of his breathing. He was everything that you’ve ever wanted.
“Fuck, I forgot to ask.” Jaemin suddenly exclaimed and you raised your head from his chest in concern to look at him only to be met with a similarly concerned expression on his face. “How is your headache now? I’m so sorry, so much happened today—”
“It’s fine.” You assured him. “Gyeoul was trying to say I’m pregnant. I told her that’s not possible and she started being very passive-aggressive.”
“Gyeoul being Gyeoul.” Jaemin continued to soothingly caress the small of your back slowly. “She’s never gonna change, forget it.”
“I would’ve said something back if my head wasn’t hurting like a bitch.”
Jaemin sincerely laughed for the first time tonight, his laugh vibrating against your ears. “The headache is from all the staring at your iPad screen for hours every night.”
“I know. I need a break.” You shifted away from his arms and propped yourself up on one elbow. You carefully studied his face, drinking in his features that you loved so much. Suddenly, you giggled at a rather unexpected thought. Jaemin laughed as well along with you and lightly kissed the tip of your nose before asking, “What is it?”
“I just had a thought,” you started. “I’m surprised I’m not actually pregnant.”
“What do you mean?”
“We’ve fucking raw for months, I’m surprised I’m not 6 months pregnant yet.”
“I mean…” Jaemin trailed off, as he let out a chuckle. “That’s how the contraceptive pills work. They stop your ovulati—
“Jaemin, my baby, my honey bun, just go to sleep.”
“Don’t call me honey bun ever again.” Jaemin pulled the covers over his head and rolled over, facing his back to you. “Good night to you my honey bun!”
“Now why are you calling me that?” You snaked your arms around his waist from the back and rested your head on top of his. Jaemin faked an over-exaggerated snore in reply and the two of you burst into laughter.
“Seriously, it’s just cringy as fuck.”
AUGUST 22
You finally ease your car into the parking space after having the same old argument with Jaemin about who was the better driver and who got to drive to the grocery store. A few pouts and kisses on his cheek was enough for him to give up and let you drive. It was a warm, sunny Saturday mid afternoon and Jaemin didn’t want to get out of the house at all. He suggested that you should just order groceries online instead of getting out of the comfort of your air conditioned living room where Jaemin was peacefully laying on the couch, watching TV but he quickly shut his mouth when you shot him the look.
Jaemin opened the passenger side door and got out. It was hot, much hotter than it was earlier in the week.
“Fuck, it feels like hell out here.” He pulled his hoodie over his head and tossed the clothing to the seat at the back. Now only wearing a plain white shirt and black pants he jogged to your side of the car in an attempt to open the door for you like the gentleman he was only to be met with you already getting out of the car yourself.
“Why did you even wear a hoodie in the middle of August?” You started walking towards the store as he followed behind you. “I was dying when I went to take Yiseul for a walk in the morning. I told you it’s hot outside.”
“You did?” Jaemin stopped walking and tilted his head in confusion. “I didn’t think it was gonna be that hot!”
“Yeah, when you were sleeping like the dead.” You made a snarky comment to remind him that he refused to get up from bed even after you attacked him with kisses when you had breakfast for two ready on the table.
“Baby, I’m sorry, I was tired!” You could almost hear him pout and it made you smile like a fool. “I would've never done that if I wasn’t tired, you know that.”
“I know, I was kidding.” You nudged at his shoulder as you two giggle like teenagers outside the store.
You two always went grocery shopping together every Saturday, that is how it has been for years ever since you moved in with him during his med school. On Saturdays you two cleaned out the kitchen and cooked a feast together before sitting down comfortably in the living room and making a list based on what you both needed and wanted.
“Where do we start?” You asked, gazing around at the enormous and slightly crowded store. “The vegeta—
“I’m getting coffee first, I haven’t had my caffeine yet,” Jaemin interrupted you when he spotted the tiny coffee shop to the side in the store which you two always walked past during these grocery store runs.
“Do you want anything?” Jaemin strolled toward the counter with a smile.
“Are you sure this is,” You lowered your voice and whispered the latter. “I don’t know, grocery store coffee, is it gonna be good?”
“Don’t care. I just need caffeine in my system right now.” Jaemin shrugged and proceeded to order an iced americano. “Do you want anything?” He asked again.
“Um, not really.” You glanced at the screen which displayed different options of caffeine drinks along with the price at the bottom one last time. Even though you’ve had your coffee already in the morning and offered Jaemin to drink as well, he refused to wake up. Eventually he left the bed while grumbling when you started complaining about not being able to clean the bedroom — only for him to go sleep on the couch again.
“One large iced americano, please.”
Your eyes widened at the mention of his order. You have been telling him to cut down on his caffeine consumption for months which he complied now and opted to order a regular sized drink instead, at least you thought so. “Jaem, I told yo—
“Large because you’re gonna start saying ‘give me one sip’ after a while.” Jaemin mocked your voice and raised his brows. You gave him a gentle nudge because fuck, he knew you too well.
When Jaemin got his coffee from behind the counter he offered it to you, insisting that you should try it first before he did. He held the cup in front of you as you took a sip and nodded in satisfaction, letting him know that it was not bad for a $1 cup of coffee from the grocery store.
“Told you it’s good.” He shrugged his shoulders and took a sip of the coffee himself as you two made your way towards the store.
You noticed a small group of girls, probably high schoolers, you assumed, behind you two — giggling and being not so discreet about eyeing Jaemin. “There are these teenagers staring at you.” Jaemin turned his head to look at the direction of your sight and you quickly smacked him in the shoulder, “Don’t look!”
“Let them be.” He slipped his hand into yours and started swinging them. “Now, where do we start?” Jaemin asked, looking uncertainly at the sprawling store before you while sipping on his coffee.
“What are we even cooking today?”
“Let’s just…see.”
“Let’s just go get sauces first.”
Jaemin nodded, taking up a position a half step behind you. You lead the way to the condiments first, thinking them among the most needed, but least likely to go bad, sorts of food to buy. Jaemin’s love for cooking came out as he selected sauces and marinades, telling you which recipes he’d use each for. His face paled when you reached for a bottle though.
“Honey mustard? I mean, well…” He tried to object gently. “Why?”
You slid the offending bottle into the cart with the others. “I had a salad with honey mustard dressing on Thursday. It was so good!”
Jaemin scrunched his nose in disgust. “Your taste is horrible.” He trailed off as he proceeded to put ramen packets in the cart.
“Yeah,” You grinned. “I’m married to you.”
“Look, I’m an exception!” His eyes twinkled as he kept up his dismayed expression and tone.
“I believe you enjoy my cooking a lot.”
“That I do.”
The shopping continued and things were going well until it was time to gather together produce. You helped pick out apples, peaches and bananas for snacking and breakfast. Turning to the vegetables section, you saw Jaemin carefully keeping two bags of potatoes and zucchinis in the cart. It was nice to see Jaemin being so relaxed and playful. It was the same Jaemin you fell in love with, the Jaemin you knew too well and trusted with your life.
“Y/N?” Jaemin clicked his fingers in front of your face making you snap out of your thoughts. “Did you hear what I said?”
“Sorry, I was just thinking about Yiseul’s food. What did you ask?”
“I got the chicken blend for her.” He pointed at the yellow and red packets sitting at the corner of the cart. “I was saying that I’m thinking about making fried rice and probably some chicken dish for dinner, what do you say?”
Your eyes lit up like he just popped a diamond ring in front of you. “Oh my god, yes.”
After paying for the three bags worth of groceries which you hoped will last for the week and having a tiny argument again in front of the car about who got to drive this time, you both were back in the car on your way home with Jaemin behind the wheel this time. Pulling out of the grocery store and driving for a while you noticed he had missed the turn which led to the apartment on the other side of the town.
“We’re going the wrong way.”
Jaemin didn't answer, just hummed as he kept his eyes on the road. He glanced at you with a smirk when he realized you’ve been staring at him in confusion. "Patience baby, I have a surprise for you.”
“We are literally on the highway now.”
“Just wait. Few more minutes and we’re there.”
"You’re so stubborn." You mumbled, opening a bag of chips you purchased at the store earlier as you watched Jaemin drive, admiring the way his profile glowed due to the sun during the golden hours. You held the chip in front of his mouth and fed him as he continued to drive…wherever he was taking you. “Are you kidnapping me?”
“I wouldn’t have waited for years to kidnap you if that was my intention.”
“God…you’re truly something else.”
It had been a while since Jaemin started to drive and you still had no idea where your husband was taking you, you asked him again a few minutes ago where he was going but all Jaemin gave you was a playful smile and a short "a surprise.”
The time read 6:20 PM and you noticed the familiar route as you breathed in the distance and the familiar sea starting to peek through the spaces between the fences and tree trunks. "You can’t be serious…" You started, disbelief in your voice at the sight of the waves crashing by the shore and the orange-yellow hues of the sky. "You’re fucking crazy, you drove for almost 2 hours to come here?"
"Nah, I brought you to a forest, for natur—" You smacked his forearm with a gasping chuckle and Jaemin yelped in surprise but quickly retorted by smacking the side of your arms. He took a left turn down a track, the one he discovered a few years ago during college, when he bought his first car with his own money. You clearly remembered Jaemin bringing you here on your second date with him, after classes, promising to get ice creams with you later. That was the day you discovered his hatred for strawberry flavoured goods.
It had definitely been a while.
The secluded parking lot that only the locals knew of gradually came into view and it brought back all the memories — driving straight to this place after classes, watching the sunsets together, all the times Jaemin had forced you into posing for his camera and lastly the all the uncomfortable car sex you’ve had in this parking lot. Jaemin stopped the engine and opened the door, allowing a gust of sea breeze to sweep through.
"Okay, get out," Jaemin commanded, tugging at your hands which you willingly abided to.
"What are you–" Your voice was cut off from your lungs when you saw nothing but darkness, Jaemin’s hands were covering your eyes as he leisurely began to lead you down the dunes and onto the flat stretch, steadily approaching the water that met up the shore. “What are you doing?”
"Shut up.” Jaemin laughed. “I'm not kidnapping you.”
“I’m aware of that.”
You two stopped walking and you could hear the waves crashing, people chattering away in the distance, feel the sand underneath your shoes and smell the salty sea air. It was exhilarating, your whole body relaxing at the sound of the sea and the cool breeze.
"Okay, now look." Jaemin said, removing his hands from your eyes.
You do as he said, and what you saw knocked the air out of your lungs, the sky was orange yellow hued as the sun set in the horizon. The sound of the waves crashing into the shore made you feel at ease after the hectic week you had at work.
“Oh my—it’s beautiful,” You looked away from the sea for just a second to smile at your husband. “It has been so long since we last came here.”
Jaemin smiled back at you softly, utterly in love. The way your skin glowed under the sun and your hair softly blew due the breeze, he was sure he was falling in love all over again. You hadn’t been to the beach in years, ever since your 4th anniversary. It seemed like you two had always been just… too busy.
It felt nice to be coming here again after years.
You glanced at Jaemin for a second and thought he looked the best during sunsets. The rays kissed his glowy skin, he looked at peace. Your heart swole looking at him, so you turned your head to face the sea instead.
"Wait, stand still." Jaemin hooted and gazed at you as you gave him a confused look. He fished his phone out of his pocket and opened the camera app. “Don’t move.”
"Baby, no, I don't have any makeup on..." You protested and started walking towards him to block the lens with your hands. “Don’t take any pictures of me, please.”
He pouted like an annoying grumpy child. “Just one? The view is great, look!”
"Fine, just don’t put them on your Instagram." You gave up and posed for his camera.
Jaemin grinned and took this as an opportunity to do the most, he squatted down on the sand and positioned his phone to get a good capture of you standing with a background of the sun setting, the sky almost dark. He smiled to himself in satisfaction, scrolling through the pictures he just took and proudly showed them to you.
"AirDrop that one to me later!" You pinched his cheeks and noticed his smile growing bigger.
"Come here.”
“What no—
“Selfie.”
Jaemin stood beside you and you smelt like the familiar shampoo, your skin glowed as the sun which was almost on the verge of getting lost into the horizon. He positioned the camera and smiled along with you. He clicked the first picture and positioned the phone again for the second one when you suddenly kissed him on the cheeks just when he tapped on the shutter.
“Let me see the picture!” You smiled widely and impatiently waited for Jaemin to unlock his phone and open his camera roll. And there it was, a blurry picture of you kissing him on the cheek captured onto his phone screen. “Send that to me as well, I’m gonna make it my home screen.”
“It’s blurry.”
“And?”
Jaemin inspected the picture for a while before concluding that it was indeed cute and you couldn’t stop grinning. He watched you and he wished he could make you smile like this everyday till his last breath.
AUGUST 25
It had officially been a year since you and Jaemin exchanged "I do’s" to each other in front of all your friends and relatives. You cringed at the thought of your wedding vows, the one which apparently made Jaemin shed some tears in front of everyone. It was shocking to think that you’ve somehow managed to complete a year with the love of your life and you couldn’t help but look forward to more. However, what excited you more was whatever Jaemin had planned for you tonight.
“What has the poor grass ever done to you?” Jaemin’s voice pulled you out of your train of thoughts outside the restaurant at the resort. Jaemin surprised you with a staycation at a lakeside resort and who were you to say no to espacing work even for just 24 hours.
“Huh? What?” You glanced at Jaemin behind you and he was too busy arranging his credit card in his wallet after paying for the over-expensive food you two just devoured. The black pants paired with the black dress shirt you got for him on his birthday made you weak at your knees. Probably it was just the wine flowing through your system but you couldn’t stop staring at him under the dim lights of the corridor outside the outdoor restaurant.
“You were just,” Jaemin paused to laugh. “Just staring at the grass like this.” He widened his eyes dramatically to mock you and you smacked his forearm.
You replied with a throaty chuckle, “I was just…thinking.”
“About?”
“I feel bad about leaving Yiseul with your mom. I told you we should just leave her at my mom’s place instead. I don’t want your mom to take the hass—
“Don’t worry about mom. She’s probably sitting on the couch with her on the lap and watching dramas right now.” Jaemin pinched your cheeks and leaned in to press a kiss. “Let’s go to the bar!”
“Now?!”
“Duh, it’s not everyday that we get to drink freely like a wild teenager. Let’s go!” Jaemin’s hand found themselves intertwined with yours as he dragged you down the corridor which lead to the dimly lit bar.
You were sure Jaemin was going to be tipsy by the end of the night and your hunch became the reality when he leaned up against the door to your hotel room. "Hey," You could tell he was drunk from the way his cheeks were flushed. "Do you have the key card thingy?"
"Yeah," You answered, as you started rummaging through your purse. "Here," you started to hand it over to him, then pulled it back. "Wait. Let me do it instead."
"You always do it too fast."
"No, I don't." You shoved the key card in the slot and whipped it out. You both watched as the little red light came on.
"Baby. See?" Jaemin was trying not to laugh as he used the wall for support. How many cocktails did he drink? You lost count after his third glass, but you suspected it might have been more by the way he wanted to giggle at everything — including you struggling with the door. Not that you weren’t tipsy as well but thankfully your alcohol tolerance had always been stronger than his.
"It's fine." She does it again and once again, the red light blinks. "Fuc—"
Jaemin laughed at your words, as if you just said the funniest thing ever, and took the keycard from you. He gave you a grin. "Here. Let me show you how it's done, baby." Jaemin’s eyes stayed on your the whole time as he very slowly slid the card into the slot, waited a beat, then slowly pulled it out. Jaemin smirked at you just a bit as the green light went on.
"Okay, fine. Get in here," You grabbed him by the collar and pulled him into the room.
As soon as the door shut, you were kissing. Sloppy, enthusiastic, drunken kisses that left you both breathless. There was something exciting about being in a hotel room, you couldn’t figure out whether it were the memories from college — the memories from the cheapest room you two could find a few years ago in contrast to one of the most expensive suites at the hotel you were in right now.
"You should do it.” Jaemin blurted out suddenly.
"Do what?" You halted unbuttoning his shirt.
"No, I mean," Jaemin paused. "Well, submit the design of yours."
“Fuck, I forgot to tell you.” You pulled away and sat on the edge of the bed, excited to tell him about your work. “I submitted my design last Tuesday! We will get the results on the 31st.”
Jaemin’s eyes widened. "Really?"
"Yeah," You waited a second longer to gauge his reaction. "How do you feel about that?"
"You're going to be such a hot, sexy senior architect and designer.”
"Don’t say senior like that, I didn’t get the promotion yet."
"You'll get it. I’ve seen you work hard every single day and night." He kissed you and you melted under his touch. “Have you considered designing our luxurious house with two floors and a backyard with a swimming pool in 5 years?”
“Yeah, with a jacuzzi and a movie theatre as well.” You rolled over on the bed, your legs still dangling off the bed and you two high-five, both dissolved into laughter. “You've got my lipstick on your lips.”
Jaemin laughed and wiped his mouth with the back of his palm. “Come here.”
You leaned into him, arms wrapping around his middle, and gave him a big grin from under his arm. “I love you,” you said, easily and happily. “Happy anniversary to us, I guess.”
Jaemin on the other hand couldn’t keep the smile off his face, the alcohol in his bloodstream contributing to his sudden giggly attitude. “I love you too. Sorry we couldn’t be at some fucking fancy resort at, I don’t know, maybe Greece.” Jaemin had slightly started slurring now. “Next year, when we’re not the busiest people on Earth, we’re definitely going on a Europe trip.”
“We will think about next year later, let me enjoy this first.” You squeaked when his hands found your waist. Before you could reply, Jaemin had already started kissing along your neck. You moaned and you're arching back against him.
“Did you bring it? I told you last ni-
“Inside the luggage.” You breathed against his lips after he pulled away. Jaemin placed one last kiss on your forehead and got up to retrieve the thing you have been looking forward to since the night before. You giggled while Jaemin nearly tripped in front of the bed.
You gulped when he placed the pink bullet vibrator with a string attached to it at the end on the nightstand and crawled over to you. His wedding ring was visible as he ran his finger up your thigh, underneath your thigh length black dress. You shivered under his touch, goosebumps forming on your skin. Maybe it was because you were tipsy but you wanted him so bad at that moment — it was driving you crazy. “You look so-
“Handsome?” Jaemin interrupted, winking one eye. “Beautiful? The hottest man in town? The best husband ever?”
“I was gonna say sexy…”
“Well come here and give your sexy a kiss then.” Jaemin didn’t need to ask twice. Your red lipstick smeared under the press of his mouth, tongues dancing together in a familiar way. When you break the kiss, you finally find your voice.
“My pretty wife,” He said, grinning widely.
“Yeah, thank you.” You replied dramatically, eyes rolling.
“I’m not done teasing yet by the way.” You could only make an unintelligible noise as he flipped you over on to your back and kissed you again. His fingers made the quick work of unzipping your dress and unhooking your bra, and he had you bare and writhing under him within minutes.
“Would you like your present now?” Jaemin breathed, his lips inches from the soft skin of your neck. You only nodded your head and Jaemin retrieved the pink vibrator from the nightstand and flicked the switch, bringing it to life immediately.
“Happy anniversary,” He grinned and pressed the tip of the rumbling vibrator against your clit. You squealed and wriggled away from him as he snickered. “What?” Jaemin continued laughing and you broke into laughter as well. “Come back here.”
“It fucking tickles!”
“Do you trust me?”
You nodded quickly. “Yeah.”
“Then relax,” Jaemin caressed your thigh. “We’ve done this before.”
“That was more than a year ago actually.” You reminded him and he playfully smacked you in the thigh.
“Just trust me.”
You inhaled a heavy breath and collapsed back on to the pillows, biting your lip as Jaemin bent his head to kiss the inside of your thighs. His fingertips stroked the soft skin around your centre, and you felt yourself begin to melt into a puddle of need. It never took him long to have you gasping; he knew just how to touch you by now and exactly what you liked. When his tongue found your core, you called his name and arched your back, toes curling into the sheets.
After a few minutes, Jaemin stilled his tongue and asked you to close your eyes. You obeyed, sinking into the darkness behind your eyelids, only to shutter them open again, shrieking, when he inserted the cold vibrator fully into your wet pussy in one swift movement.
“Shhh,” Jaemin said softly. “Trust me.”
“This shit is cold.” You giggled nervously.
“I’ll warm you up,” Jaemin smirked and flicked the switch at the highest speed. The buzz filled the room and cried out at the sensation inside you. He bent his head to trail the inside of your thighs with kisses, reaching just below your core where the vibrator was rumbling furiously. You felt something uncurling deep in the pit of your stomach, climbing higher and higher. Your palms found themselves over your mouth, not wanting to disturb the other guests at the resort. You whimpered his name over and over again, your voice almost unrecognisable. Jaemin held you firmly in place when you started squirming, his fingers digging into your hips so hard that you were sure you'd have bruises in the morning.
“T-Too much—fuck!” You were unable to form coherent sentences and Jaemin was having the best time of his life.
You really wanted to punch the smirk off his pretty face but right now all you could think about was how it felt beyond incredible. You were whimpering, sobbing and then finally, your release reached its peak, harder than you think it had ever had in your life. Jaemin on the other hand started circling around your swollen clit and you arched your back only to fall back on your elbows, hips jerking up as you chased your high. “My baby is close…”
“Ja—Oh fuck.” You mewled as your first orgasm of the night took over you. Jaemin continued to circle around your clit till it all became too much and you pulled the vibrator by the string out of you yourself and tried to swat his hands away, while you twisted into the pillows, sobbing into them. “I-I can’t…I can’t.”
“Was that too much?” He kissed you on the shoulder and caressed your back. “We’re not even done yet, baby.” God, the cockiness in his voice, you really wanted to punch him at that moment — but he made you so, so good, you didn’t have any complaints.
“Just don’t fucking overstimulate me again…” You replied with a weak chuckle, trying to catch your breath. “I would’ve probably squirted if that vibrator stayed in there for more than 5 seconds.”
“I should’ve stopped you from taking it ou—” You smacked his thigh with a gasping chuckle. “Damn, sorry.”
“There’s no way I’m doing that in a hotel room.”
“Why not? Pretty sure the staff have seen worse.”
“No seriously, just—” You got up and kissed his mouth shut passionately. Jaemin didn’t give you much time to stay still because he got down on his knees on the carpeted floor and pulled you to the edge of the bed by your thighs. “I know you’re not doing what I think you’re about to do.”
“Yes, that’s exactly what I’m doing.”
“Get a towel from the luggage, I’m begging.”
“We don’t need it.” Jaemin replied from in between your thighs. You really couldn’t tell if he was being oblivious on purpose to fuck with you or he really just didn’t know. “It only happened once.”
“Do you know my body more than m—why are we having this conversation with you in between my legs?”
“If you’re so worried about the hotel staff, I’ve got a solution for you. Call the staff and say that we accidentally spilled our beer and then there you go, new bed sheets.” Jaemin chortled. “Now, please let me just do this.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me—ah” You felt his warm tongue glide through your sensitive folds, and you threw your head back at the sensation. Your toes curled as his tongue continued circling around your sensitive nub causing you to buck your hips forward, fingers making their way into his hair. When you felt him push his two fingers inside and your walls clutched them, hips lifting as your back pressed deeper into the mattress, helping him get a better angle at that one spot.
“You’re so eager, I just started and you’re already close to cumming?” All you could do was moan as he added another third finger, scissoring them and stretching your walls, the movement having you gushing on his hand. “You’re my pretty baby,” he was speaking softly, desire clear in his low voice.
“Jaemin, please,” was all you could muster, your mind clouded from the pleasure. He obliged and pushed them in and out of you faster and faster. You felt pressure building up in your lower abdomen, tightening and threatening to burst with each of his thrusts. Your hands were gripping desperately at the sheets, as your walls were clenching frantically.
Jaemin’s other hand reached for your clit, rubbing it and after a moment you felt the tight coil in your core snap. He pulled out his fingers, as the pressure released in the form of clear liquid bursting from your pussy and splashing onto his lap and some on the sheets. Your body was shaking, your mind numb from the overwhelming pleasure.
“You’ve really made a mess,” Jaemin laughed, landing a hard slap on your ass. You let out a cry at the unexpected pain, but it soon mixed with pleasure as he began placing soft kisses on the reddened skin. You were always taken aback by this side of Jaemin when he channelled it once in a while. It was almost like an alter ego of his, a contrast to his jolly personality in front of the world, only for you to see.
“We’re still not done yet.” A second slap landed on your other ass-cheek, soon followed by an array of kisses. Your cries turned louder, as a couple more spanks decorated your skin, leaving behind the outline of his large palms. You felt your walls clench again, his words serving to arouse you further. “Can you cum again?”
You panted and snickered, raising yourself onto your elbows. “Too sensitive, maybe wait for a few minutes.”
Right after the words left your mouth, Jaemin rolled you onto your back. In an instant, his lips were crashing with yours, the intensity of the kiss taking you by surprise and your mouth opening to his tongue without any protest. You felt him trace lines with his fingertips along your stomach and chest, settling to your tits, pinching your nipples, and twisting them, your whimpers and cries swallowed by his mouth.
“Can you just fuck me now?” You whined as he pulled away.
“Weren’t you just saying you’re too sensitive?” Jaemin smirked.
“Shut up…”
“Alright.” Jaemin smirked and started unbuttoning his shirt and threw it on the floor beside the bed. You took in his sculpted chest, the way in which his muscles moved under his skin made your mouth water. He moved between your legs, spreading your thighs and placing them on his shoulders. He grabbed your ass, lifting your hips off the mattress as he aligned his cock with the entrance to your core. “Ready?”
You nodded, trying to push your hips forward in an attempt to feel more of him. His fingers dug into your hips at your movement which were definitely leaving marks for you to see in the morning.
“P-please, I need you,” you pleaded, clenching around nothing. He was so close yet so far and you needed to feel him inside you. Your pussy ached and you didn’t know how much more you could take. Jaemin leaned down to move your disheveled hair out of your and kissed you one last time on the forehead. He started pushing his cock inside you slowly and your toes curled. You closed your eyes, the way your insides were spread overwhelming you.
“That’s my baby,” Jaemin grunted as he pushed himself entirely inside you, as you squirmed at the sudden movement, walls clenching around his cock. “You’re taking me so well…” He praised as he started thrusting inside you, each movement eliciting moans and whimpers from you. You bit on your hand, trying to keep your moans down, not wanting to disturb the guests in the next room. Your skin felt like it was on fire, the way his tip pressed your sensitive spot driving you crazy, tears welling up at the corner of your eyes.
“I’m going to c-cum again.” You managed to barely form the words between your moans. He quickened the pace, his hips crashing onto yours as you felt your orgasm wash over you, making your whole body shake as your mind went blank. You were unable to let out even a whimper, the pleasure from the climax overpowering for a few moments, even your need to breathe.
Jaemin continued to fuck you through your orgasm, spurred on by the lewd expressions on your face till he emptied himself inside of you, painting for your walls white. Your legs wouldn’t stop shaking from the intensity as he suddenly placed them on the bed on either side of his hips.
Before you realized what he was doing, you felt his warm tongue on your clit again, two fingers buried deep inside, pushing his cum in, curling and trying to draw another orgasm from your now overly-sensitive pussy. “I-I…cant anymore,” you cried as your hands sunk in his hair. “T-too much, Jae—please.”
Jaemin didn’t stop even as you tugged at his hair— an half-hearted attempt to get him to stop, as you weren’t even sure you even wanted him to. He bit your nub gently, sucking on it and licking, his fingers continuing to move at the same pace as the volume of your cries rose, your body shaking. Your hips started moving on their own, meeting the thrust of his fingers as you climaxed for the fourth time.
You probably blacked out for a few seconds because the next thing you heard was Jaemin falling flat on the bed next to you, his breathing rapid, sweat dripping from his body. He started caressing your side lovingly and placed a kiss on your shoulder. “Sorry.”
Turning on your side to face him, you intertwined your hands with his, humming, “I just had the best sex of my life, shut up.”
Jaemin laughed, planting a kiss on the top of your head as his hand was stroking your hair. A few minutes passed in blissful silence before he spoke again. “Let’s go take a bath, it would be easier to clean up now than in the morning. I need to take off the sheets and call the staff as well.”
He came back to the bed after a while, picked you up gently and helped you steady yourself, handing you the glass of water. “Thank you,” you muttered lightly, your legs were wobbly which he noticed and picked you up bridal style, carrying you to the bathtub that was already filled with warm water.
“I love you, baby. Are you sure you’re alright and I didn’t go too far?” He asked again, crouched down beside the bathtub, adamant to make sure you were indeed okay.
“Jaemin, two slaps on my ass isn’t gonna kill me.” You chuckled as your body relaxed in the warm bath. He kissed your hands and stood up straight again. “They’re gonna come to take the sheets soon, let me go and clean up the room a little.”
You giggled to yourself and he frowned. “What are you laughing at?”
“Just imagining myself as the staff.” You continued laughing, punching his arm lightly. “They’re not dumb.”
“As I said, they’ve seen worse.” Jaemin shrugged. “Didn’t you see how many couples there were during dinner?”
“You’re so silly sometimes,”
“I love you.” He crouched down again and whispered into your hair, before kissing you in the temple. “Happy one year to us.”
You splashed water at him, “I love you too, my cutie.”
AUGUST 31
The evening air was cool as the strong breeze nipped at Jaemin’s skin from the open window inside his car. It was one of those days when you had to leave early in the morning, carpooling with Jisu and Yeji and Jaemin had to pick you up later in the evening. He was leaning on the leather car seat behind the wheel, too distracted with his phone to notice you slowly making your way to the car. You coughed loudly once you were close enough and his head shot up at you, a small smile already forming in his lip when he saw your face.
"Hey." Jaemin greeted you as you opened the door to the passenger seat. “How did it go?”
You don't answer and Jaemin already knew your project didn’t go well. He hummed as he watched you sit down and take a deep breath. You fastened the seatbelt and Jaemin glanced at you one last time before he started the car. "I got food for you." Jaemin motioned at the chicken nuggets and fries along with a bouquet of peonies neatly placed at the back seat.
“Flowers again?”
“Last one for the year, they’re going out of season soon.”
"I didn’t get the promotion." You broke the silence, taking a bite of the nugget as you watched Jaemin drive, admiring the way his profile glowed whenever he drove past street lights and well lit convenience stores, "They said my design was way too minimalistic.”
"Were you happy with your design?" Jaemin asked, not taking his eyes off the road. The sky rumbled above followed by a lightning strike. “Amazing, it’s gonna rain.” He muttered under his breath.
"Yeah, I was.” You chuckled lightly. “I really liked the design for the living room. Too bad I can’t submit it anywhere else now.”
“That’s what matters the most.” Jaemin replied, glancing at you for a second with a smile as his free hand intertwined with yours. “It’s truly their loss, I thought the design was perfect.”
You didn’t reply, instead you chuckled and leaned over to peck Jaemin gently on his cheek when he stopped at the red lights. “Thank you. I don’t care about the promotion, it's not like my salary was gonna increase.”
“Who got the promotion?”
“Yeji did, but her design was like, very luxurious.” You leaned back against the leather and looked up at the sky through the window when it rumbled again. “I don’t think anyone with a budget of less than $10-20 million can get her design.”
Jaemin proudly grins. “Any idea of how much your one might’ve been?”
“Budget?”
Jaemin hummed in reply.
“Probably a million or two? It had multiple window walls and—
“That’s it. It’s gonna be ours in a few years.” Jaemin replied so casually, you had to raise your head from the comfort of the seat to look at him in disbelief.
“What?”
Jaemin glanced at you from the corner of his eye, “What?”
You scrunched your brows together. “So, you’re saying that we’re gonna live in a million dollar penthouse in a few years?”
“That’s exactly what I said, yes.”
“Nice.”
Jaemin’s fingers tapped against the steering wheel in time to the song he had softly playing out of the radio and he turned his head and gave you an odd look. “Nice? You’ve got nothing else to say?”
You truly got over your fear of commitment, thanks to the man beside you. Nothing seemed scary in life anymore when you knew he was going to be by your side through thick and thin, no matter what. Unknowingly you started, “I fucking love you so much, it drives me crazy sometimes. Have I mentioned that before?”
Jaemin’s eyes widened and he was grateful his car was stuck in the traffic at that moment or else he would’ve pressed the brake pedal in the middle of the road. “That was so random…”
“Sorry, ignore me, my mind is going haywire right now.” You pulled your hands away from his and hid your face in the palm of your hands. “I need some fucking sleep.”
“It’s September tomorrow.”
You groaned. “Don’t remind me.”
Jaemin stopped the car in front of your apartment and unbuckled his seat belt. “I love you too, by the way.”
genre: slice of life, husband! jaemin, general surgeon! jaemin, fluff, smut, a teeny tiny amount of angst
words: 20.9k
contains: some medical terms and procedures, minor character death, oral (m&f), fingering, nipple play, edging, drunk sex, sex toys, overstimulation, jaemin and y/n talking way too much during sex
synopsis: august, jaemin's favorite month of the year is around the corner again - the month of his birthday and his first marriage anniversary. thirty one days in august and unknowing to you, jaemin makes it a mission to make every single day special in the midst of both of yours busy life.
The concept of commitment, marriage, and the thought of starting a family terrified you for as long as you could remember. During the first year of college, you depended on caffeine and unremarkable one night stands. Second-year and a half, you thought you found the one when you dated Bae Jinyoung from your structural design class for a year till he decided to cheat on you. The third-year and you got back to the routine of hookups and casual flings, as regret washed over you every morning on a stranger’s bed.
Until one day, your friend Aeri dragged you out with her and you met eyes with the medicine student Na Jaemin across the table at the pub while passing a bottle of beer. That same man wrapped you around his fingers and you spent months trying to combat the constant dread of commitment before finally getting used to cuddling him to sleep at the apartment he shared with your mutual friend Jeno.
Now you were living the life of your dreams — a designer at an architecture firm, happily married, living in a high-rise luxury apartment where you got the view of the sunset through the bedroom windows with the love of your life and a cute white puppy and you couldn’t ask for anything more.
AUGUST 2
You looked up from your iPad and watched Jaemin come up behind you through the mirror — he wrapped his arms around your shoulders and rested his head on top of yours. A smile that matched his took over your face as he stared at your reflection fondly.
“Let’s go to bed,” he kissed the top of your head, “you’ve been working for hours now.”
You placed the iPad on the table while Jaemin’s head still rested on top of yours. “You look cute.” You snickered at his reflection and his smile faded into a frown. “What’s with the long face suddenly?”
“Am I not sexy?” Jaemin dramatically rolled his eyes. “My birthday is in, like what, two weeks. Cute isn't for me babe.”
“God, you’re so fucking old.”
“We’re the same age!”
“Let me have my moment, please.”
“Do I get to make, what do they say on the internet — milf jokes?”
You smacked his hands away from your shoulder and he dramatically clutched his chest which earned a giggle out of you. That was how most of your nights before bed are spent — joking around, gossiping about anything and everything, lazily staring at the Netflix screen, or just mind-blowing sex before falling asleep in each other’s arms.
“Are you done?” Jaemin pointed at the iPad.
“Done for the day, I guess.”
“You’ve been working too much.”
“I kn—
“Go to bed.” Jaemin pinched your cheeks. “I’ll turn off the lights and everything.”
You shook your head quickly. “Nope, it’s fine. I'll just wait for you.”
“You sure?”
“Positive,” you informed, pushing yourself up on your toes and pressing your lips to the corner of his mouth.
“I need to go to the kitchen to keep the cups and turn off the hallway lights though.” Jaemin gave you an apologetic smile.
You pulled your arms out from around him. “Shit, I forgot.” The fact that you both took turns to do these chores every night almost slipped out of your mind. “I thought you already did that.”
“Do you wanna go?” This time Jaemin wrapped his arms around your waist, before he leaned down to capture your lips with his in a kiss.
You kissed him back quickly, pulling away just enough to meet his eyes as you replied, “Yeah. Let me just-” the next moment he leaned in and his lips reached your neck, collarbone, bristly against the tender skin before going back to your lips again. Jaemin lightly pushed you, making you land on the bed and you shivered helplessly beneath him as his hands made their way under your silk nightdress while his lips still moved against yours. You pushed him off you quickly when you felt his length hardening against your thigh.
“Wh-”
“Go and turn off the hallway lights first before we do something.” You mumbled against his now swollen lips.
“Do what?” He smirked and placed a kiss on your forehead before getting up. Jaemin was definitely the same cheeky man you couldn’t resist and stop thinking about seven years ago.
“I’m gonna get my iPad and go back to working again.”
“Fine!”
Jaemin coasted through the typical bedtime routine of clicking the lights off in the hallway, checking on Yiseul to make sure she was sleeping peacefully on the couch, and then finally made his way back to join you in the bedroom. When he came back he immediately pulled his white shirt over his head and hovered above you, not hesitating to pull your dress up above your head as well.
You were panting, still coming down from that euphoric feeling of your orgasm. Jaemin’s hand reached out and pulled the comforter over the two of you and you turned your head to glance at your husband who just fucked you silly in the middle of the night.
“Are you sleepy?” Your husband whispered, snuggling closer to you and pressing a kiss on your forehead.
“Yeah,” You mumbled, gently nudging him in the chest and eliciting a chuckle out of him in the process. Jaemin drawed you as close as possible to rest his head against your bare chest.
“What’s so fun about putting your head on my tits?” You drawled followed by a chuckle.
“Shut up, this is comfy. You won’t get it.”
You two found yourselves lying in the dimly lit bedroom, his face resting against your chest. You were convinced your legs would feel like jelly in the morning and Jaemin just said sorry in between his giggles.
“What’s the time?”
“Hmm, let me check.” You glanced over your shoulder to take a peek at the alarm clock on the bedside table, the bold red numbers showing 2:41 AM. “Almost 3.”
“Fuck,” Jaemin groaned and started, his voice muffled. “Sihyun from the trauma center just went on maternity leave yesterday and I’ve got the task to cover her shift at the trauma center every Monday before my appointments.”
“Sihyun’s pregnant again?”
“Yeah again, she literally gave birth last September.” Jaemin scoffed, getting a reminder of the fact that it was almost 3 in the morning and he needed to be present at the hospital before 9 AM just to wander around the corridors of the trauma center — unless there was an emergency.
“You need to go to sleep.” You caressed his back lightly.
There was a comfortable silence. Even though it was impossible to lounge around like how you two used to at the small studio apartment every day, cafe hopping to the other side of the town 5 years ago — Jaemin still looked forward to this exact moment every single night.
“Do you want kids?” Jaemin blurted out, breaking the silence again. Na Jaemin, you're a fucking idiot. He thought and mentally punched himself for asking that impulsively, especially when you were naked in his arms in the middle of the night.
You've ticked all the boxes and overcame the fears you’ve had for years. Commitment? Check. Marriage? Check. There was only the concept of starting a family left at the bottom of the list and you never thought Jaemin would be the first one to subtly bring it up eleven months into your marriage.
You remained silent for few seconds, which concerned Jaemin enough to make him raise his head from your chest and look at you, “I was just jok—
“That’s actually a funny thing to ask right after putting your jizz inside me.” You cut him off. Your eyes followed the movements of his fingers on your arms which seemed to halt. “I’m kidding!”
“I really thought you were mad at me for a second, fuck.”
“To answer your question, I’ve thought about it once I guess.” You cupped his cheeks, “What about you?”
“Me?” Jaemin sighed in relief before continuing. “Yeah, maybe a girl.” He hugged you tighter underneath the comforter, bringing you closer as a stream of rain continued splattering on the window and then a bolt of lightning lit up the bedroom.
“That sounds nice.”
You chuckled at the way Jaemin nuzzled into the crook of your neck. He looked ethereal, the sight of him in the post-sex glow, disheveled hair as he implied that he wanted to start a family with you. You hated to admit it but that foolish smile of his suddenly made you forget about all those fears. Jaemin was the love of your life and if there was any doubt in your mind, they’d recede into surefire promises.
“I can’t imagine demons that happen to look like you running around the house.”
“You’re already thinking about it.”
“Yeah, you should knock me up.”
“Oh my god, wait—” Jaemin raised his head from your chest to look at you again. Your eyes widened when he started chuckling. “It’s gonna happen when it’s meant to happen. You’re the one who’s gonna give birth, not me.”
“I was just messing with you!”
“You’ve given me two mini heart attacks within the last five minutes.”
“Sorry…” You cooed and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek.
Jaemin was right but that didn’t stop you from overcoming your fear and you were certain he probably just planted a seed at the back of your head. Sure, you were not in any rush but the thought didn’t sound as terrifying anymore, not when you’d have to go through it with your husband.
“Go to sleep.” You took a peek at the alarm clock on the bedside table again.
“We should’ve just gone to sleep earlier…” Jaemin said through a yawn. “It’s raining and I can’t even sleep peacefully in the morning.”
“You started it.”
“Don’t point fingers at me now, you’re the one who wanted to ride my dick.”
“Fuck you, like seriously.”
Jaemin giggled, raising his head to catch your lips with his own in reply as he kissed you with passion, which you returned with enthusiasm. The kiss deepened as he was eager to thank you for every single thing you’ve done to make him feel special, appreciated, and loved. “I love you,” He whispered, suddenly overcome with the desperation to make sure you knew that in the middle of the night. “So, so much.”
You softly placed a kiss on his forehead. “I love you too.”
The next morning Jaemin immediately regretted staying up till 3 AM, being a sappy fool in love. Shoving a toast down his throat and barely getting the time to kiss you goodbye, he was late but at least grateful for the quiet environment of the hospital hallways. The quiet and cold hallways gave him enough time every morning to enjoy his caffeine in peace before heading into the trauma center for the day or wherever he was needed.
He sipped on his iced americano, praying that it kept him alive till the evening, and pulled his white lab coat over the light blue shirt, taking a look at himself in the locker’s tiny mirror beaming with pride. Jeno sat behind him, half asleep on the chair, mindlessly scrolling through his phone and sipping on his coffee.
“Our Doctor Na is late again,” a voice spoke behind Jaemin, which made him look over his shoulder. “Good morning, Jeno.” Donghyuck was standing at the door with his hands on his hips as Minjeong sipped on her coffee behind him. “This is his second time this week!”
“First of all, I’m exactly 5 minutes late.” Jaemin defended himself before returning to the mirror to fix the collar of his coat. “Second of all, this is actually my first time this week.”
“Leave the poor man alone. He’s not even that late.” Minjeong chuckled from behind Donghyuck and took a seat on the uncomfortable chairs the hospital had placed in these rooms.
“No, Minjeong, I need to know what his excuse this time is.” Donghyuck’s taunting made the three of them chuckle. “So, Dr. Na, what is it this time? What was it last time—
“Traffic.” Jeno interjected. “It was crowded on the streets, I don’t blame him.”
“Why are you both ganging up on me? Don’t you guys have a shift now?” Jaemin interjected to change the topic. He knew Donghyuck enough to know that he wouldn’t let this go till he got behind it.
“I’ll deal with my shift later.” Donghyuck shook his head. “Now, you tell me. Why are you late?”
“Why do you wanna know?” Both Jeno and Minjeong ask in unison.
“Jinx.”
“Because I’m nosy as fuck.” Donghyuck retorted curtly, making both Minjeong and Jeno exhale harshly through their noses hard as they masked their laughter. “Quick, I have got an appointment, Jaehyun’s gonna beat my ass.”
“Hyuck, you know, you’re too aggressive for a pediatrician sometimes,” Minjeong commented which earned her a death glare from Donghyuck.
“Na Jaemin, please…”
Jaemin shoots a terrifying glare back at her before quickly returning to face Donghyuck, who has a sweet smile plastered on his face. “I’m going to my ca—
Donghyuck interrupted Jaemin yet again, “Minjeong, and Jeno, are you thinking what I’m thinking.” He looked up and started examining Jaemin up and down. “This man fought with his wife in the morning.”
Minjeong burst out in laughter followed by Jeno and Donghyuck. Jaemin stood in the center of the room with his fingers on his temples, as the three laughed uncontrollably. “Guys, stop.”
“Wait, really?”
“No! Why would I fight with Y/N?”
“What is it?”
“Wait a damn minute,” Donghyuck squinted, coming closer to eye Jaemin’s neck. “Fuck, sorry for bringing up your—” He fake coughed, “fun activities at home.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?”
“Don’t you see the hickey? At least cover it up with your collar properly.” Donghyuck started taunting him while Minjeong continued laughing. “Minjeong, you won’t believe me when I say this. Jeno couldn’t sleep because of him and his girlfriend back then.”
"Who told you that?"
"Jeno did."
“Lee Jen—
“His wife or an ex?” Minjeong curiously interrupted Jaemin and Donghyuck looked like he was having the time of his life airing Jaemin’s business out early in the morning. Jaemin glanced back at Jeno who refused to look at him in the eye.
“Of course it’s Y/N, his high school girlfriend of 2 years dumped him 6 months into college.” Donghyuck remarked as Jaemin stood in the corner glaring at him in silence.
“Dude, you know way too much.” Minjeong furrowed her eyebrows. “How in the world do you know all these?”
“Jaemin told me himself.”
“Forget it,” Jaemin muttered and glanced at Jeno who was looking at him apologetically. He fixed his collar hesitantly, hoping that all of them, especially Donghyuck, would eventually forget about this incident and go on about their days. “It’s 9:25 right now.” He added, giving them a small reminder.
“I need to go!” Minjeong stood up suddenly, and downed her coffee before throwing the disposable plastic cup in the trash. “And Jaemin, please cover it up.” She warned before closing the door behind her.
“Goodbye, I’m leaving as well.” Jaemin gave Donghyuck a mischievous smile as he slammed the door shut, leaving Donghyuck alone in the room to clean up the table.
"You're not coming?'' Donghyuck asked Jeno.
Jeno stifled a yawn, "I have a surgery at 10:30, let me take a nap till 10."
"Don't tell me you were having sex asw-sorry!"
"Let me just nap."
Donghyuck shrugged and hurriedly threw away his cup, organized the table, and jogged down the hallway to catch up with Jaemin’s pace, gaining some confused looks from the interns and nurses who walked by. Donghyuck apologetically mumbled a few sorrys before catching up with Jaemin.
“You walk way too fast for my liking…” Donghyuck tried to catch his breath when Jaemin finally stopped in front of the elevators.
“Guess I have long legs.” Jaemin remarked with a sarcastic tone.
“Are you going to your chamber?” Donghyuck still huffed and puffed, trying to stabilize his breath.
“Nope, dialysis unit.”
“Oh.” Donghyuck hummed, the two of them slightly bowed when a small group of nurses passed by the two of them. “Were you actually being serious on Friday?” He added and Jaemin stopped in his tracks. He didn’t even know what Donghyuck was talking about but he surely blamed the influence of alcohol for blabbering in front of Lee Donghyuck out of everyone because now Lee Jeno and Kim Minjeong were probably aware of everything as well. Jaemin loved Donghyuck, he really did, but sometimes he wished his best friend knew how to keep his mouth shut.
“Oh.” Jaemin scratched the back of his neck. “About what?”
“Are you fuc—“ Donghyuck lowered his voice when the elevator door opened and a nurse walked out with a patient in a wheelchair. “You forgot?”
“I think so…” Jaemin mumbled and pressed the button to the 9th floor. “What did I say?” He looked at Donghyuck with a puzzled expression.
“You’re impossible.” Donghyuck groaned, making Jaemin chuckle lightly. “You were supposed to pay for my breakfast today. My beautiful wife had cereal for me today and I didn’t have it for you.”
Jaemin arched his brow. “Cereal?”
“Yeah, cereal. Got any problem with that?”
“Nope, absolutely not.”
“Don’t tell me you already had your breakfast…” Donghyuck glanced at him and his expression soured when he noticed Jaemin had started sneering. “I’m dragging you to the 12th floor anyways. I’m hungry as shit.”
“I have-”
“You’re paying.” Donghyuck pressed the button to the 12th floor with a scowl on his face.
“Fine.”
Donghyuck took his sweet time eyeing all the sandwiches and wraps through the glass. Jaemin on the other hand never understood why his coworkers seemed to be obsessed with the cafe at the hospital of all places. Sure, they had great americano which was enough to satisfy his caffeine fix for the day but he was never fascinated by the avocado egg sandwich which Donghyuck liked so much.
“You’re not having anything?”
“I already had breakfast,” Jaemin replied apologetically, and mentally he blamed the bottles of soju he downed after work on Friday. He wasn’t the best when it came to his alcohol tolerance and it wasn’t a surprise that he didn’t even remember telling that to Donghyuck. “Is Jeno coming?” Jaemin added.
“Right.” Sarcasm rolled off his tongue as he proceeded to order his regular avocado egg sandwich and pointed his thumb behind him at Jaemin when the cashier asked whether he would be interested to pay with cash or card. “Jeno has a laparotomy at 10:30, he said he was gonna take a nap till 10.”
Jaemin sighed and pulled his black leather wallet from his pocket to search for his credit card. His actions halted for a few seconds when his eyes fell on the picture of you from years ago, the one he always forgot to replace with a recent picture. It was a picture Jaemin took on your first anniversary — you had the biggest smile on your face, probably laughing at something stupid he had said. Curiosity got the best of Donghyuck and he peeked over his shoulder to see what Jaemin was eyeing so intently with a fond smile. Jaemin seemed to notice his friend snooping and he quickly pulled his card out, handing it over to the poor cashier.
“So, you’ve got a picture of Y/N in your wallet.” Donghyuck started as the two made their way to the back of the cafe, usually reserved for the hospital staff away from the patrons.
“You’re so nosy.” Jaemin rolled his eyes and unscrewed the cap of the water bottle he purchased for himself earlier. “I’ve had that picture for years now. I’m surprised you just saw it today.”
“I don’t go through people’s wallets.”
“Yeah, right.”
“Don’t you have surgeries today?” Donghyuck ate his sandwich and strolled across the floor to the dialysis unit area behind Jaemin, flashing a smile at an older nurse, “Wait, why are you here?”
“I have a cute little patient here, the curative surgery from last month. They had to shift her here for an emergency dialysis last night, her potassium levels kept rising.” Jaemin opened the door, greeting the nurses on duty followed by Donghyuck who did the same.
“Is it Son Jinah?”
“Hmm.” Jaemin hummed, “I’m kinda worried, her condition is slowly deteriorating every day.”
“There’s nothing we can do.” Donghyuck slowly patted Jaemin at the back. “I’m leaving then, thanks for the breakfast. I’ll pay for your lunch later!” Jaemin nodded in response and Donghyuck walked back out of the door, his silhouette visible on the frosted doors before he disappeared into the hallways of the dialysis unit.
Jaemin sighed and approached his patient, with the brightest smile on his face. He sat down by the bed and extended his hand to pat his patient on the head, trying to gain some attention from the seven year old girl named Jinah.
“Good morning. How are you feeling?” Jaemin gave her a sweet smile. He loved the children at the hospital, his colleagues often joked about how he treated them like they were his own children. Truthfully, it broke his heart to see them like that, he felt helpless. He hated watching vulnerable families in distraught every single day, knowing he couldn’t do anything.
Jinah was looking out of the window staring at the newly bloomed green leaves of the spring on trees right outside the window. Her ears perked up when she heard the voice of her favorite Doctor Na.
“Doctor Na! Good morning.” Jinah pouted. “I just finished having my breakfast, they gave me an apple today!”
“Did you finish eating everything?” Jaemin glanced at Jinah’s catheter on her neck and watched the blood flow through the two tubes which lead to the dialysis machine. Jinah just turned 7 years old a month ago, her birthday being celebrated at the hospital while she continues to suffer from leukaemia for 10 months now. Jaemin only met her recently when he was assigned to perform a tumor removal surgery on her.
“Yes, I did!” She kept nodding, making sure Jaemin saw. He quickly glanced at her and gave her a small smile before going back to skimming through her blood test reports. “They also gave me rice with seaweed soup and kimchi.”
“Good girl, I’ll come to visit you in the evening, okay?” Jaemin looked up from the files on his hand again and looked at her apologetically. “I’ve got work today, sorry.” He pouted.
“Promise you’re gonna visit later?”
“Promise!”
AUGUST 9
jaemin: baby are you still at work
y/n: im leaving in 5. packing rn
y/n: why
jaemin: do we have leftovers
y/n: we finished it all in the morning 😞
y/n: ill make fried rice later
jaemin: dont im stopping at the chinese
restaurant
jaemin: im getting spring rolls for
u aswell dont worry 🥺
y/n: oh i was just gonna tell u to
get spring rolls
jaemin: hah
y/n: love you
jaemin: love you too
Jaemin came home after you with a bag full of brown takeaway boxes and a bouquet of pink peonies again. Before you could interrogate him about the flower bouquet, he dropped everything on the kitchen countertop and ran into the master bedroom to change, only stopping to greet Yiseul on his way.
“What’s up with these flowers every other day?” You asked while dividing the spring roll portions and glanced at the beautiful pink peonies sitting on the other side of the counter. Jaemin almost didn’t pay attention to what you were saying at first because one, he hadn’t eaten the entire day, thanks to an emergency appendectomy right before lunch time and two, those wontons were too good. You were taking your sweet time picking through the box of wontons between you two on the countertop. “Where’s all this romance coming from?”
“Okay, let me explain.” Jaemin chuckled and put his chopsticks down on the plate. “There’s a new florist shop nearby— pretty and big. They got these descriptions and all beside all the flowers on display. And you like peonies anyway so I just buy them, it’s 2 minutes away from the hospital anyway.”
“But I don’t—
“You don’t like them?” Jaemin almost choked on spring rolls, you giggled and passed him a glass of water.
“You didn’t even let me finish,” you laughed, watching him stare at you in disbelief. “I do like peonies, I just don’t remember telling you. You always got me roses in college so I just assumed I never mentioned.”
“You told me once before we even started dating. I never got you peonies back then cause these flowers are fucking expensive. I only got you six stems on our first anniversary and that shit cost $60.” Jaemin raised his chopsticks and pointed at one of the takeaway boxes beside you. “Pass the chow mein.”
You passed the box and took a couple of bites from the wonton in front of you. Jaemin must’ve eaten nothing today, you thought, because he was devouring the chow mein in front of you like a starved man. “Why did you skip lunch today?” You suddenly voiced concern.
“How’d you know?”
“You just—I can tell.”
“I had an appendectomy today right before lunch break. A damn emergency surgery and I’m literally the only one free at that time.” Jaemin shoved another wonton into his mouth. “Then the scheduled appointments started again, I didn’t get time for lunch.”
“You could have texted me, I would’ve gotten the food on the way instead.”
“I had coffee if that makes you feel any better.”
“Are you fucking se— you know what, do whatever makes you happy.” You chewed down a piece of spring roll as you mumbled. “I just don’t want you to get sick two days before your birthday, you overwork yourself.”
“Ah, my birthday.” Jaemin put his chopsticks down again and scratched the back of his neck. “Fuck, I’m old as shit. I even forgot about my own birthday.”
“Fucking hell, I’m so worried about you sometimes. For someone who’s a physician, you really don’t give a shit about your own health.”
Jaemin chuckled lightly. “I’m fine. I should be the one worried about you. How was work today? I forgot to ask, sorry.”
“Just meetings and some construction sightings.” You sighed and set chopsticks aside, taking a sip of water before continuing. “I think my client Mr. Park didn’t like my layout. So, I’m just gonna redesign after we clean these up.”
“When’s the next meeting with Park?”
“Hmm, next week.”
“Then, you’re going to sleep early today. No questions asked.”
A sudden realization hit you like a truck. You were in fact married to Na Jaemin, one of the kindest beings you had ever met in your life. Despite majoring in two different subjects and classrooms five buildings away, Jaemin always made sure to walk you to your building every morning for your 8 AM lectures after both of your Starbucks runs. You were forever going to be grateful to your friends, Donghyuck and Aeri for forcing you out of the library one evening because you found both love and friendship in this man who is addicted to caffeine just like you, loved to cook and an avid shopaholic — it was still impossible to wrap your head around the fact that you were indeed married to your best friend.
You drew your lip between your teeth, almost sullen. “I just—
“Hmm?”
“Just…” You sighed and took another bite of wonton.
Jaemin put his chopsticks down and waited patiently but it looked like time had frozen for him until he got an answer out of you, something outside of fragmented stuttering. “Just..?”
“Jus— please don’t think I’m crazy.” You sighed again. “I can’t believe I’m married to you now. It’s just— I once told Aeri ‘I’m gonna marry this dude’ as a joke not even two months into dating because you walked me home in the rain.”
Jaemin laughed for the first time tonight, not a light chuckle but a sincere laugh. “You should’ve told me earlier that the bare minimum got you worked up like that. I wouldn’t have been running to the other side of the town to get you poké bowls every two weeks.”
“Don’t speak to your wife like that.” You threw the closest napkin you found around you on the countertop at him. “It’s your turn to do the dishes today.”
“Yes, I remember.”
“Good luck. I can help you with the mugs maybe.”
“Thank you wifey,” Jaemin winked, earning an eye roll from you in return as he started piling up the takeaway boxes on top of each other to dispose of them. “Green tea before bed today?”
“Sure.”
AUGUST 13
You woke up slowly to the sun shining faintly through the window and the sound of birds chirping outside. Slowly opening your eyes and looking at the alarm clock on the bedside table, the bright bold red numbers showed that it was 6:52 AM. Rolling over, expecting to see the birthday boy still fast asleep, you were met with the empty and cold side of the bed instead.
Your head felt heavy when you crawled out of the bed, however, a headache was the last thing to worry about right now— instead, you blamed the melatonin pill you took last night and started wondering where your husband might be. At first, you assumed it was an emergency from the hospital but that assumption was quickly refuted when you saw Jaemin’s phone charging on the bedside table. Walking out of the bedroom, you found both Jaemin and Yiseul in the kitchen. He was clad only in his grey sweatpants, and had his head bowed over a small mixing bowl as he stirred the contents inside along with a pot of coffee brewing on the counter. Yiseul on the other hand was basking in the sunlight near the window. You smiled at the sight, and leaned against the doorframe to watch but then it hit you — it was Jaemin’s fucking birthday and you had been making a mental note since the start of this month to surprise him with breakfast on bed.
“What in the world are you doing?" You asked, making Jaemin jump. “I was gonna make breakfast for you…”
Jaemin dropped the mixer and dramatically clutched his chest with his left hand. “Not even a happy birthday or good morning for me?”
You planned out an entire schedule for Jaemin’s birthday two weeks ago. Starting with waking up 40 minutes earlier than usual to replicate a heart shaped toast with eggs which you saw on Pinterest, pick up tiramisu on your way home from work because he isn’t the biggest fan of cakes and then finally a candlelit dinner later in the evening at a fine dining restaurant. You were so close to accomplishing the first goal before you walked out of the bedroom and saw Jaemin in the kitchen.
“Happy birthday, my oldie.”
"Good morning to you too.” He snorted, taking a peek at the clock on the wall. “You woke up early today, congratulations.”
Ignoring his snarky comment, you walked into the kitchen and placed a chaste kiss on his lips out of instinct. “Give me the bowl.” Jaemin shot you a look before you clarify, “It’s your birthday baby. I wanted to get you some breakfast in bed.”
“Y/N, we’re too old for that. Birthdays are only fun when you’re young, free, and 20.” Jaemin frowns softly, resuming to stir the pancake mixture.
“We’re in our late-twenties, not 60.” You hit him on the shoulders. “Besides, don’t you remember my 23rd birthday? We were drunk as shit and ended up fucking in the club’s bathroom.”
“Didn’t you also throw up on my bed later when I dragged you back to my place?” Jaemin reminisced about that night from 6 years ago. You nodded and a chuckle escaped his lips, “I started freaking out because, what the fuck do you do when your drunk girlfriend of only a few months throws up on your bed.”
“Baby, you just proved my point. Birthdays are amazing now.” A smug grin appears on your face, happy that you have won a silly argument. “Can you please pass me the bowl?”
“You’re supposed to let the birthday boy be happy and making breakfast for my wife makes me happy.” Jaemin gave you a cheeky smile. “Now leave the fucking kitchen.”
“Do whatever makes you happy, I’m not leaving.” You stood behind him and wrapped your arms around his bare torso from the back. You watched him pour the batter onto the greased pan and once he was on the waiting step of the process, you pressed a kiss to his cheek with a mumbled compliment on how good it smelled.
Jaemin’s shirt on you nearly covered the shorts you were wearing, and he recognized it as the one he took off before bed. He turned his head and you giggled at the attack of kisses on one side of your face.
"Weren’t you wearing something else last night?" Jaemin questions before turning around and flipping the pancake.
“Yeah, I changed after I finished working. You were already snoring by then.” You smiled and rested your head on his shoulder. “You didn’t notice when you woke up?”
“You were literally buried under the comforter, like a cocoon when I woke up.” Jaemin turned his head again to place a kiss on top of your head. “You need to stop staying up late every nigh—
“Just flip the pancake!”
"Or what?" He challenged.
"Or we’re gonna end up starving." You kicked at his leg as he continued laughing and turned to the fridge for fruits. Jaemin moved to the sink to rinse and slice them. You on the other hand took over the stove to flip the pancake.
"It’s done.”
“Y/N, wait a minute, let me make scrambled eggs as well.” Jaemin already has the eggs in a bowl as he whisks them with a fork. “We need to have some protein!”
“Here comes Doctor Na,” you laughed while arranging the plates on the table. “I’m not having eggs, I feel sick.”
“Why, what happened?” Jaemin’s eyes are widened as he looks at you in concern. “Are you o—
“Don’t. My head kinda hurts, it's probably the melatonin.”
“You never listen to me. I’ve been saying stop working late at night, it’s not worth i—
“Okay, okay!”
“I’m serious, Y/N.”
“I will, don’t worry.” You assured him and placed a kiss on his temple. “Life is so hard when you have a doctor at home.”
Your words elicited a chuckle out of Jaemin. You noticed the dark circles under his eyes, etching a permanent exhaustion into him you were so used to seeing. You wonder if he saw the same on your face too, especially recently since taxing clients have literally been dumped on you with a deadline.
Jaemin stood in the doorway to ICU near Jinah’s room, and he could already feel his lower lip tremble slightly at the thought of what picture would lay beyond the door, in the hospital bed. Jaemin was informed that Jinah had a stroke the night before right after entering the premises of the hospital and was immediately rushed to the ICU.
She looked so fragile, broken, and every bit of Jaemin started shattering into pieces. Jinah was currently unconscious; and he suddenly remembered telling her his birthday was today a week ago. A nurse brought Jinah to Jaemin’s consulting room one afternoon a week prior during his lunch break because she wouldn’t shut up about her favorite Doctor Na.
“Who’s that?” Jinah pointed at the small photo frame beside Jaemin’s computer in between the plants he always had on his desk. He curiously followed the direction of her sight and it was a picture of you and him from your honeymoon in Bali— both of you in sunglasses, smiling brightly under the sun.
“That’s my wife.” Jaemin grinned at her, who was sitting across from him in her wheelchair. “Isn’t she pretty like our Jinah?”
Jinah giggled, “I want to meet her one day when I’m not sick anymore!”
“She would love to meet you, Jinah. I already told her about you a few days ago!” Deep down Jaemin knew it was impossible when her condition kept getting worse every single day and he was ultimately met with his fears this morning.
Upon noticing Jinah’s family, Jaemin decided not to enter the room. He watched her through the window, an oxygen mask on her face, hundreds of pipes attached to her tiny, fragile body. The heart monitor continued to beep beside the bed — Jaemin knew there’s not much time left, that’s what everyone and the oncologist Kang Seulgi predicted. The cancer had already spread everywhere, resulting in ischemic stroke. Soon enough it will spread to her CNS and she will be gone.
“I just heard they might put her on life support if she doesn’t respond within the next 24 hours.” Jaemin flinched at the sudden familiar voice behind him which belonged to Jeno.
“When did you come?”
“Just now. I went to your room and you weren’t there.” Jeno shoved his hands into the pockets of his coat. “Yeseo at the reception said you might be here.”
“Yeah, I was about to leave.” Jaemin rested his back against the cold walls and looked at Jeno. “Is anyone looking for me? I left my phone in my room.”
“Yeah, kinda.” Jeno scratched the back of his neck. “Come with me.”
Glancing at Jinah one last time through the window, Jaemin followed Jeno out of the ICU unit. He was aware of the fact that he couldn’t do anything — it was a part of his job to say goodbye to these people at the end of the day and there was no point in sulking at that moment. He soon forgot about everything when he entered his consulting chamber and was met with Donghyuck, Minjeong, and a few other staff, surprising him with a small brownie and a few balloons. Remembering it was his birthday, he started looking forward to spending the evening with you instead.
After a long day, from a minor surgery to a woman hitting on him during a check up till she saw the ring on his finger — Jaemin was finally free and on his way to the restaurant texted him when suddenly he received a text from you. He pulled his phone out of his pocket when the car stopped at the red light to respond to the series of texts you had sent just now.
y/n: im so fucking sorry
y/n: im stuck with the
managers at a meeting
jaemin: oh
jaemin: do i cancel the
reservation?
y/n: i'm so sorry
jaemin: no it’s fine
i’m tired as fuck
jaemin: come home quick, ill
make fried rice and we can
watch a movie 😘
jaemin: i love you
y/n: i love you too i’m
so sorry
y/n: ive got your tiramisu btw
jaemin: just come home quickly
It’s 8:30 PM and Jaemin exhaled deeply before he made a short phone call to cancel the reservation at the restaurant. He drove home when it was nearing 9 while listening to his favorite playlist, placed the peonies he got for you in a white vase, got changed, cooked a small portion of fried rice for himself with whatever he found inside the fridge and waited patiently for you while slowly petting Yiseul on his lap in the dimly lit living room. The Netflix show on the TV only worked as a background noise as Jaemin forced himself to stay awake.
“Happy birthday,” A voice slowly whispered and Jaemin felt a pair of lips on his forehead. “I got peonies for you this time!”
Jaemin’s eyes slowly opened, and he yawned as he rubbed his eyes. “Oh, you’re home.” He stifled yet another yawn, “What time is it?”
“10:30 PM.” You said flatly. “Baby, I’m so sorry. I fucked up, it’s your bi—
“I’m actually glad we didn’t go out for dinner.” Jaemin interrupted and gave you a tired smile. “I’m way too tired today, I just wanna cuddle you to sleep.”
“Still, it’s your birthday…”
“Which I’m spending with you right now,” Jaemin placed his phone on the coffee table, next to two cups and a teapot. One of them is half full with green tea, while the other is clean and empty. “Get changed, I made chamomile tea again because it suddenly clicked that you had a headache.”
“Jaem—
“How is your headache now?”
“I took paracetamol in the evening, I’m good now.” You assured him.
“Sure?”
“Yes, I’ll be back in 10 mins!”
A random movie played on the TV, and the two of you were tangled up on your couch with Yiseul on the other couch, half-watching the show and complaining about how unrealistic this show was as you passed the box of tiramisu back and forth.
“Did you take lactaid?” You were always concerned about the poor man beside you, who happened to suffer from lactose intolerance yet decided to indulge in dairy every once in a while.
“I actually did,” Jaemin replied after shoving the last bit of tiramisu in his mouth, he paused to chew before speaking again. “I was having the chocolate ice cream we had at the back of the fridge earlier.”
“How was work?” You got up, leaving Jaemin alone on the couch, and made your way towards the kitchen to throw away the empty dessert box in the trash.
“Kinda— very shitty.” Jaemin heaved a sigh, “Jinah isn’t doing well, she’s at the ICU right now.”
“Fuck, what happened?” You stopped in your tracks behind the counter. He loved that little girl, as if she was his daughter. His eyes sparkled with joy every time he mentioned her randomly during dinner or showed you a selfie of the two of them.
“She had a stroke, I really don’t know much honestly. Forget it.” He said, a small smile spread across his tired face as he threw his head back on the couch. “The staff got me brownies today because I made a special announcement to not get cakes for me after Renjun’s birthday disaster.”
You gasped as soon as the words left Jaemin’s lips. “Fuck, let me get your present.”
“You didn’t have to get me anything,” Jaemin shot you a confused look, letting a small smile quirk at his lip as you continued to beam up at him.
“Of course I did...it’s just something little, I promise.”
Jaemin sighed at your explanation, rolling his eyes at your undisturbed excitement, and shook his head with a small laugh when you raised your eyebrows at him. He knew there’s no point in arguing with you.
“Just wait for 10 seconds, I’ll bring it out,” You smiled and planted a chaste kiss to his lips before scurrying away towards the bedroom. You rushed to your side of the closet, pulling the neatly wrapped box from behind the well-stocked row of clothes hanging inside the wide doors and putting the package behind your back as you shuffled back to the living room.
“Close your eyes.” You laughed, pouting at him when he gave you an annoyed look. “Please?”
You smirked when Jaemin complied, crossing his arms and relaxing on the couch as you made your way over to him. “What is it?”
“Jesus, you’re so impatient,” you plopped down on the couch next to him and placed the box in his lap. “Open your eyes!”
You held down another goofy smile when Jaemin opened his eyes, picking up the box in his lap and jokingly examining it. You playfully pushed on his shoulder and encouraged him to just get on with it, drawing your knees up to your chest to rest your chin on your bent legs as he tore the wrapping paper away. He wasted no time in opening the box, a fond smile taking over his features as his eyes scanned the black button-up shirt in front of him.
“Thank you, I love it!” Jaemin turned his head to look at you, leaning in to press a quick kiss on your cheeks.
“You might want to wear it and see if it fits you, I bought it online.” You casually replied, trying to hold down your thrill that threatened to ruin the actual surprise.
Jaemin followed your suggestion and pulled the shirt from the box, eyes narrowing when he noticed another box tucked underneath the clothing. “What’s this now?” He chuckled, making you let out your own giggle as he dropped the shirt on the couch to grab the real present.
“Just open it. I know you will love it.”
Jaemin gave you an incredulous look before slipping the lid off, mouth curling into an unbelieving smile as he pulled the silver necklace with two small rings as the pendant from the small cushion it sat on. “You didn’t have to do this, baby,” He stuttered, running the cold metal along with his fingers.
“Shh, you deserve it,” You quietly responded and felt your heart practically skip a beat when Jaemin turned his head to look at you. You watched as his fingers fiddle the clasp open and you understood his silent request when he held out the necklace to you.
“I love you,” Jaemin whispered, leaning in to capture your lips in a gentle kiss and pulling your hips further down against his. You sighed into the kiss when he suddenly picked you up and placed you on his lap and you flexed your fingers against his shoulders. He pulled away, the sweet moment almost ruined for you when his hands greedily squeezed at your thighs. “Any other surprises for me?”
“Actually, there are two more presents,” You smirked, letting your hands slide from his shoulders to rest against his chest. “One, for now, another one for tomorrow morning.”
“Morning?”
“I’m taking you out on a brunch date.”
“Understandable. What’s now then?”
“Oh trust me, you’re gonna love it.”
“Fuck,” Jaemin threw his head and replied back in a low voice, irises thinning as his pupils expanded with the implications of your suggestive words. “What could that be?”
“You’re gonna love it,” You innocently replied, scurrying out of his lap while holding down a smile when Jaemin seemed taken aback by your language.
“I think I know where this is going.” You ignored him and kept a heated eye contact as you got down on your knees, cursing the hardness of the floor under your knees that you knew would make you sore tomorrow.
“Fuck, okay.”
You decided to take the initiative of pulling his sweatpants down, considering it was his birthday after all, and tried to control your rapidly increasing heartbeat when you pulled the clothing down his legs. It makes your mouth practically water to see his half-hard cock in front of your face, wasting no time in wrapping one hand around his length to slowly pump along his shaft.
“Why are you staring at the ceiling?”
Jaemin hissed. “You’ve got my dick in your hands!”
“This isn’t anything new.” You laughed as you continued to slowly pump along his shaft. “I’ve been sucking your dick for the past 6 years!”
“I know…” His head snaps towards you with a glare. “How the fuck do you just stare at me when I’m going down on you? Be honest.”
“It’s hot.”
“A freak is what you are.”
“I wasn’t the one buying shit like nipple clamps and vibrators.” You shot back at him, making him raise his head from the couch to look at you.
Jaemin waved his hand around in defense, “It was experimental and you liked it!”
“Yes I did, shut up.”
“No, you shut u—” Jaemin’s breath hitched and his head lolled back as you took him in your mouth, swirling your tongue around the head of his cock. His hips thrusted forward involuntarily, pushing him further into your mouth, and you braced yourself on his thighs.
Jaemin hissed out a few curses, and his hands found themselves in your hair, his fingers gently running through them. Your eyes flicked back up to see his chest heaving and he used his hand to gather your hair away from your face, allowing him to see exactly what you were doing — even though he was being bashful about it earlier. You kept your eyes on him as you got to work, pulling away for a brief second just to drag his sweatpants a little further down his legs to give you better access.
Setting up a steady rhythm, you used a hand on the rest of his cock, slicking it with your saliva, before sliding down to play with his balls. You loved the feel of him which was very familiar to you by now. This wasn’t the first time you’d lovingly traced every inch of him with your tongue. But it never got old, and you could never get enough of him.
Admittedly, you would love the feeling of him even more somewhere else and you clenched just thinking about it. But right now this was more than fine, and you lost yourself for a moment, forgetting that you two were in the living room rather than the bedroom where you preferred to perform these activities. All you focused on was Jaemin; his taste, his scent, concentrating on using your tongue and breathing through your nose, letting the swelling head of his cock hit the back of your throat. Jaemin’s breathing grew harsher, his body tensed like a coil ready to spring, and you knew he was close. The hands in your hair clenched tighter, and you sped up, bobbing up and down on his cock with deliberate movements, moaning around him.
“Y/N…” Jaemin’s voice was strained and you knew that was his warning that he was close to his release. When he did, it was powerful, his body jerking forward, his cock hitting the back of your throat again as he spurted his release in hot waves. You kept your mouth on him, swallowing every last drop as best you could, still watching his face.
Jaemin looked ethereal– his head thrown back in pleasure, his mouth open wide in a silent moan, all those muscles in his arms flexing and straining. He was still holding your hair tightly, but slowly his hands unclenched to smooth out your hair.
When he finally relaxed, you pulled away from him, delicately wiping your mouth and licking your lips. Jaemin opened his eyes and gently cupped your cheek, a sated grin on his face.
“What?” You locked eyes with him as you shifted onto his lap, smoothing your hands down his shoulders after you had secured it and holding in a breath when his hands settled on your mostly bare thighs - the lacking fabric of your shorts mixed with the position not leaving much to the imagination when you were practically dripping on his lap.
“How did cum get on my t-shirt?” Jaemin pointed at the white stain near the hem of his black t-shirt.
You wiggled your brows, “I wiped my hand on it.”
Jaemin gave you that look which made you giggle for a second before leaning in to capture your lips in a kiss, tasting himself and pulling your hips further down against his. You moaned into the kiss and pulled away when his hands unashamedly trailed over to your ass. “You’re so beautiful…”
You teased him. “Don’t be sappy now. I had your dick in my mouth not even two minutes ago.”
“Why do you ruin everything…” Jaemin trailed off when you pulled your t-shirt over your head, throwing it somewhere behind you in the living room. You were glad you had chosen to forget your bra after changing earlier. Excitement and arousal coursing through your body as you settled on his lap, legs resting around him. You used your arms to push your tits together while staring at Jaemin with mock innocence in your gaze, feeling a sense of pride when his cock twitched against your clothed core at the sight and taking it as a sign to resume your activities.
“Bedroom.” Jaemin shot back in a low voice, irises thinning as his pupils expanded.
“Can’t you just put your dick inside me here?” You shifted on his lap against his lap, hoping that the slight friction will make you feel at ease.
“Nope,” A sly grin crossed his face and you suddenly yelped when Jaemin stood up on his feet and picked you up bridal style to carry you to the bedroom. When your back hit against the cool mattress Jaemin immediately pulled his shirt over his head and hovered above you, and you knew the night just began. Not that you were complaining, it was his birthday after all.
AUGUST 14
The morning light filtered into the room, soft and warm. Enough to wake Jaemin up before the obnoxious alarm went off. The sunlight was almost blaring at him through the curtains, sunshine much brighter than it was through the thin white curtains of your shared bedroom — though the blinds are partially closed.
Trying to not wake you up beside him, Jaemin sneaked away from your arms for a quick trip to the bathroom followed by quietly opening the closet to grab the first pair of sweatpants he could find. You groaned and moved a little from the rustling, but weren’t phased by how he had to move away from the tight grip you had around your waist even in your sleep. Jaemin smiled to himself when he heard you continuing to snore lightly.
He made his way under the warm covers after wearing his sweatpants and back to you as he crawled over your body to wrap himself around your left side carefully. Jaemin’s lips brushed against your forehead in a feather-like kiss, before he settled back in and laid there to admire you.
You looked so peaceful to him, taking even breaths of air, letting out quiet snores through your partially opened mouth, and completely bare of any clothes. You stirred briefly, unconsciously cuddling closer to Jaemin. His eyes fell on the diamond wedding ring glimmering on your ring finger against his chest. The movement made your hair tickle against his nose, the scent of the shampoo you used a little stronger than before.
Jaemin laid like that for some time, drowsing happily while the person he loved the most in the world slept beside him. He’d have to wake you up eventually, if you didn’t do so on your own, but for the moment, he was content to stay like that, it was the weekend after all. You stirred again, sooner than he’d think you would.
"Morning.” Jaemin started, as he apologetically watched you yawn into your palm. "Did I wake you up?"
"Not really, I did hear you close the bathroom door.” You snuggled up to him, lying your face against his chest before smooching him on the cheek. When you slid your thigh up to lie on top of his left, he gave you a comforting kiss on the very top of your head. You loved the weekends, when you both had the time to bask in each other's body heat as you laid in silence in each other’s comfort without thinking about getting out of bed.
You lazily opened your eyes and it was too much for Jaemin to resist. He kissed you again, brief at first, and then kissed you again, and again, barely giving either of you a chance to breathe. It woke you up the rest of the way, and you responded with kisses of your own, though your shoulders shook with barely contained laughter.
You made a face at him, rolling your eyes in fond exasperation, and tried to pull away from him. His arm tightened around you, holding you firmly against him. “Last night wasn’t enough for you?” You gasped and chuckled when Jaemin rolled on top of you.
Jaemin passionately kissed you and pulled away to say, “It’s never enough.” His hardening length was poking at your thighs. One of your hands stayed at the nape of his neck, tickling the tiny hairs, while the other hand ran down his side and back to his hip.
You bucked your hips up to grind against him. You took your hand from his hip and placed it on the bulge through the sweatpants. Jaemin melted in your touch. He couldn’t get close enough and wanted more of you. You removed your hand and placed it around his neck, pulling his lips in for another kiss. He rolled his bulge against your bare pussy, relishing in the friction.
You felt his hot breath on your neck. He sucked on the skin, leaving marks for him to admire later. You removed his grip from your tits and guided his hand to your pussy where you needed him the most and your breath caught in your throat when you felt his fingers on you.
Jaemin’s finger found your clit and rubbed soft circles before sliding his finger down to your slick entrance. He wasted no time curling his finger to find your sweet spot. He loved to watch you cum undone beneath him. Jaemin added another finger to your wet pussy. He pumped them in and out at a rapid speed, “Oh my god, Jaem—” and you breathed out when he pulled out.
“What the fuck? I was gonna cum!”
“Damn that sucks.”
“It’s not gonna suck anymore when I make myself cum and just fall asleep while you’re gonna get blue balls.”
“Shhh, have some patience.” Jaemin wasn’t ready to give you what you wanted and you absolutely hated his habit of teasing you during sex. You felt the wetness on his fingers when he touched your legs. He placed both of his hands on your thighs and slowly, moved them up your body till they found their place on your hardened nipples, he took one of the buds in his mouth and his tongue started moving in circles around them. Jaemin softly pinched your nipple with his fingers and while his mouth was busy on the other. He kept his eyes glued to yours as he brought his other hand down to your pussy. He didn’t waste any more time before inserting the two fingers back into your hole while his mouth still worked on your nipples simultaneously. Your mouth widened, but a gasp was stuck in your throat.
“Are you close, baby?” Jaemin pulled away from your nipple with a pop sound and his lips moved against the skin of your neck. You didn’t have the ability to respond and you opted to nod instead.
Jaemin slowed his movements, and you groaned in frustration underneath him. He wasn’t wrong. Your walls pulsed around his fingers and you needed a release. “Don’t kill me.”
“Na Jaemin…this is the second fucking time.” You breathed out. “I’ll scream if I don’t get to cum within the next 2 minutes.”
“Don’t scream at 6 in the morning!”
“You’re so fucking annoying, let me just cum then!” You tested Jaemin for a moment, but when he started to pull his fingers out, you knew he wasn’t playing. “Wait, Jaemin. Don’t do that.” You kissed him just below the ear and you were satisfied because Jaemin gave in immediately when you gave him that look. His fingers moved inside of you again, quickly. His thumb was back on your clit. “Cum for me, baby.” He growled and that was enough for you.
Your back arched as you finally came around his fingers and your whole body shook. Jaemin took the moment to kiss you while feeling you cum undone. He took in the moans and kissed you through your orgasm. When your body finally relaxed, Jaemin lifted himself up to kiss you passionately again.
“Don’t wipe your hands on the bedsheet like last time.”
“I didn’t do that intentionally!”
“I don’t care, I still had to do that laundry!”
“Whatever.” Jaemin dramatically rolled his eyes and shifted onto his knees. “Can I…?”
“Can you what?” You looked at him with a confused expression. He discarded his sweatpants somewhere in the room and hovered above you, slowly stroking his cock as he kept his eyes fixated on you. Your eyes darted to his cock. “Are you asking if you can put your dick inside me or what?” You asked and Jaemin nodded while you tried and failed to hold in a laughter. “We’ve had sex so many times and you’re embarrassed to ask if you can stick your dick in me?”
“Yeah,” Jaemin shook his head. “It’s called being polite!”
You laughed and kissed his jawline as your fingers wrapped around cock. His precum was slick against your fingertips and you slowly picked up your speed. You listened to how disorganized his breathing had gotten. He jerked his hips up into your fist. His cock felt hard and hot against the palm of your hand. You gave his cock one last squeeze before Jaemin’s hand grabbed a hold of your wrist. It was such a fast movement that it startled you for a moment. He brought his legs up and pushed your hand off of his cock. “Shit, stop, stop.” His voice was weak. “I’m gonna cum.”
Jaemin rolled over on top of you. “Put your legs on my shoulders.” He guided you into the position. He took his stiff cock in his hand before thrusting it into your wet pussy. He pushed it in with a deep groan. His balls hit your ass with every thrust and the two of you knew he wasn’t going to last long, he just wanted to cum inside of you and you wanted it too.
“Oh, fuck, Jaem.” You moaned as your fingers circled against your clit. You clenched around his cock and Jaemin came undone. He held back his moans in his throat as he spilled his seed inside of you. The groans that did escape his lips were music to your ears and sped up the process of your next orgasm. He slid your legs off of his shoulder and pulled out of you just as you came, causing his cum to spill out of you as well. You let out a quiet giggle when you seemed to have calmed down.
Jaemin suddenly felt a little self-conscious. “Why are you laughing?”
You turned over, tangling your legs with his. It was sweaty, but he pulled you closer anyway. You kissed him on the lips. “Nothing. I just love you.”
He wrinkled his brows, “And you think that’s funny?” He couldn’t help but let out a breathy laugh as well.
“No,” You smiled. “It makes me really happy.”
Jaemin smiled back, not that you saw the smile for long as your tired eyes drifted shut and you scooted down in the bed to lay your head on his chest. He kissed the top of your head, his mind feeling bombarded by the sense of unconditional love.
He sighed, squeezing your forearm, “We should get up.”
“It’s the weekend, baby.” You disagreed. “I’m not leaving the bed before midday.”
“Yeah.” Jaemin gave in, “but let me set an alarm for 10. It’s my turn to walk Yiseul today.” He moved above you to grab his phone from the nightstand. When he finally got under the covers again, you listened to his heartbeat until it faded somewhere while you drifted off to sleep.
AUGUST 17
A fatigued Jaemin entered the condo and the aroma immediately reached his nose. The sight of you cooking in the kitchen while Yiseul played with a soft toy on the floor was enough to make him forget about the dreadful day he had at the hospital earlier. You were in the kitchen, your back facing him and Jaemin was sure you were not aware of his presence yet due to the AirPods in your ears.
"Oh, you're home early today! Get changed quickly, I'd prefer if you shower first," you spoke, chopping a cluster of vegetables.
Jaemin stopped in his tracks, he wanted to surprise you with a back hug and he also got a bouquet of peonies on his way home. Jaemin usually stayed back at the hospital till 7 PM every day, monitoring the in-hospital patients and having meetings about their well-being with their beloved families. Today, nonetheless he was let go at 5 PM right after a successful surgery, thanks to the new resident, Park Jisung. “How’d you know I came, I was being qu—oh my baby there you are.”
You could hear your pet dog, Yiseul, barking – she loved Jaemin, and wouldn't let him into the apartment without him petting her. His voice resembled a kindergarten teacher’s voice as he crouched down and greeted the animal.
“All this love after insulting her last night?” You quipped while washing up the chopping board.
“Don’t accuse me of shit I haven’t done.” Jaemin sat on the floor to pet Yiseul, “Right? I’d never insult you.” He cooed in front of the animal as if she could understand what he was saying.
“Whatever floats your boat!”
Jaemin stood up on his feet and walked behind you to grab a vase from one of the cupboards. He removed the fresh-cut pink peonies from the crinkly brown paper and started arranging the florals in the vase before placing them on top of the marble counter.
"What are these for again?" Your mind started wandering to different directions and you solely blamed the workload for that.
"Try to guess?" Jaemin smirked and took a few steps closer.
"Just say it, I'm wondering whether it's a special day today or not.”
Jaemin smiled, and it made his eyes crinkle at the edges. "You’re beautiful."
"Shut up,"
"What? It’s true." He hugged you from behind, wrapping his arms around your waist and squeezing you a little. You let out a squeal and laughed. “Y/N," Jaemin mumbled, "You still didn't guess what these are for," he whispered and kissed your neck.
"I can't. I've had a busy day at work, meetings were crazy today.” You confided. Jaemin was stubborn, you knew that the second you saw him across the table for the first time. He wasn't letting you go any time soon if you hadn't mentioned work. “Just say it.”
"No reason, I just felt like it." He murmured and nuzzled into your neck. “I see them in front of the shop while leaving the hospital and I just get them.”
“Thank you.” You faced him and pinched his cheeks, “How was work?”
"The same old shit," Jaemin let you go and started munching on the carrots you just kept in the bowl after slicing them. “Jinah suddenly asked about you today, called you pretty and all.”
“Who?” You remember Jaemin rambling about someone called Jinah a few nights ago but you were way too drowsy to register what he was saying and instead opted to hum along with him till you fell asleep in his arms. “Sorry, I probably forgot.”
“A kid at the hospital, she has cancer. I did her tumor removal surgery and now we’re like…friends. She likes me a lot for some reason.” You could almost hear the excitement in his voice. “I go visit her every evening, and she suddenly asked about you today.” Jaemin pulled his phone out of his pocket, “Look, this is her.”
Jaemin’s phone screen displayed a selfie of him with a cute little girl, both of their smiles were so bright you almost didn’t notice the tubes and bandages attached to her small body. “She’s cute, isn’t she?”
“Hmm, she is.” You nodded. “Tell her I called her pretty as well!”
Jaemin shook his head in reply, “Anyways, anything interesting at your work today?”
“Nope, just designers being a pain in the ass. Jisu spilled coffee over her sample work, that's the most that has happened today.” Just as you finished talking your breath hitched, Jaemin was trailing wet kisses down your neck. “Jaem, not now.”
He chuckled and rested his head on your shoulder from the back, “it smells good, what are you cooking?”
“You’ve been here for at least 5 minutes now! You don’t know yet?”
“I was talking to you, how would I know…” He smiled sheepishly and kissed you on the cheek.
You smacked his shoulders, "Remember the tubs of kimchi mom sent? We still have those.” Scooping a little of the soup out of the pan, you blow on the spoon and hold it out to Jaemin to try. "What do you think?"
"Mm, that's good," He said. Your face breaks into a smile, stirring the pot again.
"I called your mom for the recipe this afternoon, you know how my one always gets salty. And for dessert—
"You, I hope." Jaemin’s eyes were twinkling with merriment, but there was a heat there that you knew all too well.
"Ew, I hope you didn’t forget that I’m on my period.” You scrunched your nose in disgust and Jaemin laughed again.
“I actually didn't. I got you your chocolate covered strawberries and new tampons.”
“You did?”
“Yeah, it’s on the ta—
“I love you!”
"Give me a kiss then." Jaemin said, leaning closer, "You know, you haven't given me one yet."
"I can play hard to get."
His hand on your waist suddenly tightened and he picked you up, placing you onto the counter. "You were playing so hard to get."
"Cause you only wanted me for my pussy." You snorted as your legs wrapped around his waist.
“N—that’s half true." Jaemin stuttered, a faint blush appearing on his cheeks. You cupped his face in your hands as you kissed him deeply. “I did only want to get my dick wet first, I’ll give you that.” He mumbled against your lips.
“I knew it!”
“I—we’ve got rings on our fingers now!” Jaemin started waving his hand around in defence, desperately shoving the white gold ring on his ring finger onto your face. “You’re stuck with me forever.”
“I’m aware.” You were trying so hard to not burst into laughter especially when Jaemin was whining in defence like that in front of you.
"Don’t make me feel bad now." He suddenly started pouting. You broke into a smile and kissed him again, feeling warm, strong, and like home. “Yeah, I just wanted to get laid at first but I really, really liked you…”
You gave him another kiss on the lips. “I love you.”
"I love you too wifey.”
“Now let me go before the rice sticks to the bottom of the rice cooker. And you,” you pointed at him with your index finger, “Take a shower. I'm not letting you anywhere near the food before that."
“Yes ma’am!” Jaemin walked away from the kitchen while nodding, processing all the commands you were giving him. He crouched down to pet Yiseul again, “Y/N, do you want me to run a bath for you after I’m done showering?” Jaemin asked from the living room.
You smiled and nodded along in response. A bath sounded great after the long day you had at work.
“The lavender bath bomb, right?”
“Yeah! That one, thank you!”
AUGUST 19
It was a Thursday and you were having the worst day a person could possibly have — you wouldn’t even wish it upon your worst enemy. The heels were uncomfortable on your feet and without a doubt you were sure it would leave bruises on your ankles. To make things worse than it could possibly be, you woke up with a nasty headache which turned into the need to empty your stomach at 5 in the morning.
Jaemin hugged you close and assured you it was due to overworking yourself and staying up past midnight the last two weeks. He sat on the edge of the bed while massaging your feet and explained how stress can cause nausea, suggesting you to call in sick today.
“I wish I could. There’s a workshop today.” You grumbled against the pillow and he continued to massage your feet sympathetically. “This stupid project,” You rolled over to look at your husband. “Jaemin, I’ll literally take a week off after this shit is over just to sleep 24/7.”
“You deserve it more than anyone right now.”
The glass of your desk caught the reflection of your tired face cleanly. You silently played with the spoon sitting inside the cup of a strawberry probiotic yogurt you got from a convenience store 2 minutes away instead of having the chicken rice bowls they were serving downstairs during the lunch break.
The door to your cabin cracked open as Gyeoul peeked her head in with her mouth full, “You’re not coming for lunch?” She entered with her bowl of rice when you shook your head and sat on the chair across the table. The aroma of the food she was devouring almost made you feel nauseous again.
“You’re on a diet?” Gyeoul questioned, eyeing the yogurt cup.
“Nope, I just don’t feel like eating.”
“Are you okay?”
“Not really, I’ve got a massive headache.”
“Kim talks too much right?” You frowned at the mention of your boss, remembering how talkative of a person he was. The workshop was going smoothly till he decided to start , along with yours and you were convinced that contributed to your already throbbing head.
“Yeah,” You nodded and watched a grin forming on Gyeoul’s lips who seemed to agree with you as well. “I’ve actually had this headache since the morning but Kim blabbering just gave it a boost.”
“Is our Y/N perhaps pregnant?” Gyeoul wiggled her eyebrows in an attempt to crack a very unfunny joke. You forcefully laughed along with her while shaking your head and hands in an attempt to deny the accusations. “I’m joking! You’ve been working a lot nowadays. It’s the stress, it happens.”
Spooning at your yogurt, you ignored her and continued, “Can I ask you something?” Mentally you slapped yourself for thinking about breaching such an intimate question suddenly.
Gyeoul paused for a second, her mouth agape. “Wait, are you actually pregnant?”
“No, what the fu—I apologize for my language. Let me know if this feels too personal though.”
“Okay?”
“Yeah. Don’t worry, I’m just—” Running your hands through your hair, you sit up straight and toss out the rest of your yogurt cup in the bin at your feet. “I feel like actual shit since Friday morning, you know, nausea and headache.”
Gyeoul shot you a flat look. “So, you are pregnant? Those are some early pregnancy symptoms.”
Undaunted, you continued, “Nope, I’m not. I’ve been on the pill for years.”
“Did you take a test or miss your period?” Gyeoul inquired, “You know, pills aren’t effective all the time, right? Your husband is a doctor, you should know that.”
You were slightly taken aback by her snarky remark directed towards you and Jaemin as well you supposed. Your expression probably read offended now but you forced a smile and continued, “Yes, I’m aware. I don’t need my husband to know that.”
“Does your husband know?” You were starting to feel like Gyeoul was mocking you now.
“He knows about my headache, yes.”
“I'm not a gynaecologist but you should take a test,” Gyeoul suggested.
You shifted in your seat and replied, trying not to sound bitter, “Yeah I will.”
“The workshop resumes in 10 minutes.” Gyeoul shoved a spoonful of rice in her mouth and with that she stood up on her feet and exited your room, leaving you with thoughts you didn’t want to have and a pile of unfinished designs which have been killing you slowly for weeks.
y/n: are you free
jaemin: surgery in 20 mins baby
jaemin: ill call u later
y/n: okay love you
jaemin: love you too
y/n: no emoji today? :(
You sent him the text and went on with your day, forgetting about the whole conversation with Gyeoul as the workshop and designs occupied your entire afternoon and evening. However, you checked your phone after 5 hours and the messaging app on your phone showed that Jaemin still hadn’t read the last text you sent. It wasn’t unusual for him to not read texts for hours, there have been days when you texted him in the morning and he would reply in the evening. You let it slide and resumed working on your landscape design for a client again.
7 PM and you haven’t heard from your husband in hours. You sighed, knowing that Jaemin could sometimes be a slow responder if he had surgery. Yet, a tiny kernel of worry was in the back of your mind. Upon entering the apartment, you called out his name, just in case he had come home early, the chances being quite unlikely given his incredible work ethic. Instead, you were met with Yiseul who came running towards you. You put your files and the small plastic bag containing a few cans of beer from the convenience store on the marble counter after petting Yiseul for a while, and sent him another text.
y/n: i’m home now where are you
After a moment, when your heart did the telltale lurch of worry, you resolved to keep yourself busy and do some light tidying around the apartment, take a cold shower and even a power nap on the couch to occupy those intrusive thoughts you couldn’t stop. When you finally decided to call Donghyuck, you reached for your phone and dialed his number, lifting it to your ear, listening to the constant dialling sounds until you were left with Donghyuck’s voicemail — the same as Jaemin.
Placing the phone down on one of the couches, you paced around the apartment, chest beginning to heave a bit deeper as your mind raced with horrible imaginings and the dreaded question of 'what if?'
At 11 PM, after another agonising wait of an hour and 40 minutes, consisting of mindlessly scrolling through your phone, there was a sound of the door unlocking and you very nearly rocketed off to the moon. Yiseul on the other hand, excited to see her favorite human at the end of the day, jumped off the couch and ran towards the door as well.
The door opened and in walked Jaemin, still in his white coat. 'Where were you?” You asked rather harshly, which you realized after the words slipped out of your mouth. “Have you checked your phone?”
Jaemin didn’t speak as he continued to take off his socks, almost pretending like you weren’t about to go ballistic in front of him. You took the deepest breath possible, and asked quite softly this time, "Where have you been? I called Donghyuck and got no response a—”
“Hello, my baby,” Jaemin mumbled, crouching down to hug the white, fluffy dog. The person who was always vibrating with joy was now speaking stoically in front of you. You took in his expression when he stood up, watching his tired face, the eyebags, and impulsively let him bury his head in your shoulder before inquiring any further. “Can I get a hug from you?”
“What happened?” He immediately engulfed you in a tight, tighter than he has ever hugged you. Your voice was muffled against his shoulder and you felt his shoulders shaking gently as you ran your hands down his back. The temptation to start screaming at him from earlier replaced with concern, "Are you okay?"
“Jinah passed away.” Jaemin looked at you for the first time tonight, the dark circles under his eyes more evident than usual. “I should go get changed.”
You were at loss for words after he spoke. Everything was as clear as the day to you now — Jaemin was practically attached to Jinah, he would bring her up every time he’d get the chance with a fond smile, showed you selfies he took with her every other day and loved sharing anecdotes about her. Your voice trembled despite you trying to keep it together, heart sinking deeper and deeper into your stomach by the second as you looked at his sorrowful face. “How—what happened?”
Jaemin continued to pet Yiseul, who was wagging her tail, happy to be in between two of her favorite humans after hours. “Internal bleeding, we had to perform a laparotomy in the morning and she just—” Jaemin’s voice cracked at the end, his own eyes watering. “I was in charge and she just—
“She’s in a better place now.”
“Why am I even crying?” Jaemin let out a weak laughter while wiping his tears. He hadn’t wanted to fall apart, but it was a long time coming. He watched her take her last breath — the same cheerful child was lifeless in front of him. Jaemin couldn’t look at Jinah’s family in distraught when the new resident Park Jisung informed them outside the operating theatre. A tear rolled down Jaemin’s cheek and he started, “I know it’s my job-”
“Surgeons have feelings just like everyone else. It’s okay to cry.” You wiped his tears with your hand and tried not to start crying as well, knowing that it would make his situation worse. Jaemin rested his head on your shoulder and let it all out, slightly staining your shirt with his tears in the process.
“I love you.” He mumbled against your shoulder. “Sorry, this isn’t like me. You know I don’t cry.”
“You cried on our wedding day though.”
“Stop bringing that up…” He chuckled through his tears and cupped your cheeks. “I don’t know what I would do without you.”
You let out throaty laughter and kissed him on the cheek which made Jaemin chuckle through his tears as well. “Go take a shower.”
Jaemin seemed to calm down after a warm shower, a bowl of instant ramen that you cooked for him and playing around with Yiseul in the living room. He comfortably laid on his back while you were resting your back against the bedpost. “I thought about something while showering.” He paused and looked at you. “I’m coming home to my family, everyone at the hospital is but Jinah’s family? They’re going to be grieving for days, maybe even years. She was their only daughter.”
“That’s just how fate works.” You replied slowly, running fingers through his locks. “There’s nothing we can do about that.”
“I know, it sucks.” Jaemin nodded and his lips quivered into a smile when he rolled over to look at you. “I took a day off tomorrow, more like, Jaehyun forced me into taking one.”
“You need to spend the entire day just sleeping like a baby.” Jaemin laughed when the words left your lips, making you gaze at him with a confused look. “What?”
“Nope, I’ll clean the house, cook for us, go to the park with Yiseul.” He paused to give you a sheepish smile, “I can’t make breakfast though, sorry. I’m not leaving the bed before 10.” You chuckled after he finished listing everything he wanted to do tomorrow. Leaning over, you wrapped your hands around Jaemin's chest tightly and you never wanted to let go. The scent of his cologne flooding your senses, the warmth of his touch, the calming sound of his breathing. He was everything that you’ve ever wanted.
“Fuck, I forgot to ask.” Jaemin suddenly exclaimed and you raised your head from his chest in concern to look at him only to be met with a similarly concerned expression on his face. “How is your headache now? I’m so sorry, so much happened today—”
“It’s fine.” You assured him. “Gyeoul was trying to say I’m pregnant. I told her that’s not possible and she started being very passive-aggressive.”
“Gyeoul being Gyeoul.” Jaemin continued to soothingly caress the small of your back slowly. “She’s never gonna change, forget it.”
“I would’ve said something back if my head wasn’t hurting like a bitch.”
Jaemin sincerely laughed for the first time tonight, his laugh vibrating against your ears. “The headache is from all the staring at your iPad screen for hours every night.”
“I know. I need a break.” You shifted away from his arms and propped yourself up on one elbow. You carefully studied his face, drinking in his features that you loved so much. Suddenly, you giggled at a rather unexpected thought. Jaemin laughed as well along with you and lightly kissed the tip of your nose before asking, “What is it?”
“I just had a thought,” you started. “I’m surprised I’m not actually pregnant.”
“What do you mean?”
“We’ve fucking raw for months, I’m surprised I’m not 6 months pregnant yet.”
“I mean…” Jaemin trailed off, as he let out a chuckle. “That’s how the contraceptive pills work. They stop your ovulati—
“Jaemin, my baby, my honey bun, just go to sleep.”
“Don’t call me honey bun ever again.” Jaemin pulled the covers over his head and rolled over, facing his back to you. “Good night to you my honey bun!”
“Now why are you calling me that?” You snaked your arms around his waist from the back and rested your head on top of his. Jaemin faked an over-exaggerated snore in reply and the two of you burst into laughter.
“Seriously, it’s just cringy as fuck.”
AUGUST 22
You finally ease your car into the parking space after having the same old argument with Jaemin about who was the better driver and who got to drive to the grocery store. A few pouts and kisses on his cheek was enough for him to give up and let you drive. It was a warm, sunny Saturday mid afternoon and Jaemin didn’t want to get out of the house at all. He suggested that you should just order groceries online instead of getting out of the comfort of your air conditioned living room where Jaemin was peacefully laying on the couch, watching TV but he quickly shut his mouth when you shot him the look.
Jaemin opened the passenger side door and got out. It was hot, much hotter than it was earlier in the week.
“Fuck, it feels like hell out here.” He pulled his hoodie over his head and tossed the clothing to the seat at the back. Now only wearing a plain white shirt and black pants he jogged to your side of the car in an attempt to open the door for you like the gentleman he was only to be met with you already getting out of the car yourself.
“Why did you even wear a hoodie in the middle of August?” You started walking towards the store as he followed behind you. “I was dying when I went to take Yiseul for a walk in the morning. I told you it’s hot outside.”
“You did?” Jaemin stopped walking and tilted his head in confusion. “I didn’t think it was gonna be that hot!”
“Yeah, when you were sleeping like the dead.” You made a snarky comment to remind him that he refused to get up from bed even after you attacked him with kisses when you had breakfast for two ready on the table.
“Baby, I’m sorry, I was tired!” You could almost hear him pout and it made you smile like a fool. “I would've never done that if I wasn’t tired, you know that.”
“I know, I was kidding.” You nudged at his shoulder as you two giggle like teenagers outside the store.
You two always went grocery shopping together every Saturday, that is how it has been for years ever since you moved in with him during his med school. On Saturdays you two cleaned out the kitchen and cooked a feast together before sitting down comfortably in the living room and making a list based on what you both needed and wanted.
“Where do we start?” You asked, gazing around at the enormous and slightly crowded store. “The vegeta—
“I’m getting coffee first, I haven’t had my caffeine yet,” Jaemin interrupted you when he spotted the tiny coffee shop to the side in the store which you two always walked past during these grocery store runs.
“Do you want anything?” Jaemin strolled toward the counter with a smile.
“Are you sure this is,” You lowered your voice and whispered the latter. “I don’t know, grocery store coffee, is it gonna be good?”
“Don’t care. I just need caffeine in my system right now.” Jaemin shrugged and proceeded to order an iced americano. “Do you want anything?” He asked again.
“Um, not really.” You glanced at the screen which displayed different options of caffeine drinks along with the price at the bottom one last time. Even though you’ve had your coffee already in the morning and offered Jaemin to drink as well, he refused to wake up. Eventually he left the bed while grumbling when you started complaining about not being able to clean the bedroom — only for him to go sleep on the couch again.
“One large iced americano, please.”
Your eyes widened at the mention of his order. You have been telling him to cut down on his caffeine consumption for months which he complied now and opted to order a regular sized drink instead, at least you thought so. “Jaem, I told yo—
“Large because you’re gonna start saying ‘give me one sip’ after a while.” Jaemin mocked your voice and raised his brows. You gave him a gentle nudge because fuck, he knew you too well.
When Jaemin got his coffee from behind the counter he offered it to you, insisting that you should try it first before he did. He held the cup in front of you as you took a sip and nodded in satisfaction, letting him know that it was not bad for a $1 cup of coffee from the grocery store.
“Told you it’s good.” He shrugged his shoulders and took a sip of the coffee himself as you two made your way towards the store.
You noticed a small group of girls, probably high schoolers, you assumed, behind you two — giggling and being not so discreet about eyeing Jaemin. “There are these teenagers staring at you.” Jaemin turned his head to look at the direction of your sight and you quickly smacked him in the shoulder, “Don’t look!”
“Let them be.” He slipped his hand into yours and started swinging them. “Now, where do we start?” Jaemin asked, looking uncertainly at the sprawling store before you while sipping on his coffee.
“What are we even cooking today?”
“Let’s just…see.”
“Let’s just go get sauces first.”
Jaemin nodded, taking up a position a half step behind you. You lead the way to the condiments first, thinking them among the most needed, but least likely to go bad, sorts of food to buy. Jaemin’s love for cooking came out as he selected sauces and marinades, telling you which recipes he’d use each for. His face paled when you reached for a bottle though.
“Honey mustard? I mean, well…” He tried to object gently. “Why?”
You slid the offending bottle into the cart with the others. “I had a salad with honey mustard dressing on Thursday. It was so good!”
Jaemin scrunched his nose in disgust. “Your taste is horrible.” He trailed off as he proceeded to put ramen packets in the cart.
“Yeah,” You grinned. “I’m married to you.”
“Look, I’m an exception!” His eyes twinkled as he kept up his dismayed expression and tone.
“I believe you enjoy my cooking a lot.”
“That I do.”
The shopping continued and things were going well until it was time to gather together produce. You helped pick out apples, peaches and bananas for snacking and breakfast. Turning to the vegetables section, you saw Jaemin carefully keeping two bags of potatoes and zucchinis in the cart. It was nice to see Jaemin being so relaxed and playful. It was the same Jaemin you fell in love with, the Jaemin you knew too well and trusted with your life.
“Y/N?” Jaemin clicked his fingers in front of your face making you snap out of your thoughts. “Did you hear what I said?”
“Sorry, I was just thinking about Yiseul’s food. What did you ask?”
“I got the chicken blend for her.” He pointed at the yellow and red packets sitting at the corner of the cart. “I was saying that I’m thinking about making fried rice and probably some chicken dish for dinner, what do you say?”
Your eyes lit up like he just popped a diamond ring in front of you. “Oh my god, yes.”
After paying for the three bags worth of groceries which you hoped will last for the week and having a tiny argument again in front of the car about who got to drive this time, you both were back in the car on your way home with Jaemin behind the wheel this time. Pulling out of the grocery store and driving for a while you noticed he had missed the turn which led to the apartment on the other side of the town.
“We’re going the wrong way.”
Jaemin didn't answer, just hummed as he kept his eyes on the road. He glanced at you with a smirk when he realized you’ve been staring at him in confusion. "Patience baby, I have a surprise for you.”
“We are literally on the highway now.”
“Just wait. Few more minutes and we’re there.”
"You’re so stubborn." You mumbled, opening a bag of chips you purchased at the store earlier as you watched Jaemin drive, admiring the way his profile glowed due to the sun during the golden hours. You held the chip in front of his mouth and fed him as he continued to drive…wherever he was taking you. “Are you kidnapping me?”
“I wouldn’t have waited for years to kidnap you if that was my intention.”
“God…you’re truly something else.”
It had been a while since Jaemin started to drive and you still had no idea where your husband was taking you, you asked him again a few minutes ago where he was going but all Jaemin gave you was a playful smile and a short "a surprise.”
The time read 6:20 PM and you noticed the familiar route as you breathed in the distance and the familiar sea starting to peek through the spaces between the fences and tree trunks. "You can’t be serious…" You started, disbelief in your voice at the sight of the waves crashing by the shore and the orange-yellow hues of the sky. "You’re fucking crazy, you drove for almost 2 hours to come here?"
"Nah, I brought you to a forest, for natur—" You smacked his forearm with a gasping chuckle and Jaemin yelped in surprise but quickly retorted by smacking the side of your arms. He took a left turn down a track, the one he discovered a few years ago during college, when he bought his first car with his own money. You clearly remembered Jaemin bringing you here on your second date with him, after classes, promising to get ice creams with you later. That was the day you discovered his hatred for strawberry flavoured goods.
It had definitely been a while.
The secluded parking lot that only the locals knew of gradually came into view and it brought back all the memories — driving straight to this place after classes, watching the sunsets together, all the times Jaemin had forced you into posing for his camera and lastly the all the uncomfortable car sex you’ve had in this parking lot. Jaemin stopped the engine and opened the door, allowing a gust of sea breeze to sweep through.
"Okay, get out," Jaemin commanded, tugging at your hands which you willingly abided to.
"What are you–" Your voice was cut off from your lungs when you saw nothing but darkness, Jaemin’s hands were covering your eyes as he leisurely began to lead you down the dunes and onto the flat stretch, steadily approaching the water that met up the shore. “What are you doing?”
"Shut up.” Jaemin laughed. “I'm not kidnapping you.”
“I’m aware of that.”
You two stopped walking and you could hear the waves crashing, people chattering away in the distance, feel the sand underneath your shoes and smell the salty sea air. It was exhilarating, your whole body relaxing at the sound of the sea and the cool breeze.
"Okay, now look." Jaemin said, removing his hands from your eyes.
You do as he said, and what you saw knocked the air out of your lungs, the sky was orange yellow hued as the sun set in the horizon. The sound of the waves crashing into the shore made you feel at ease after the hectic week you had at work.
“Oh my—it’s beautiful,” You looked away from the sea for just a second to smile at your husband. “It has been so long since we last came here.”
Jaemin smiled back at you softly, utterly in love. The way your skin glowed under the sun and your hair softly blew due the breeze, he was sure he was falling in love all over again. You hadn’t been to the beach in years, ever since your 4th anniversary. It seemed like you two had always been just… too busy.
It felt nice to be coming here again after years.
You glanced at Jaemin for a second and thought he looked the best during sunsets. The rays kissed his glowy skin, he looked at peace. Your heart swole looking at him, so you turned your head to face the sea instead.
"Wait, stand still." Jaemin hooted and gazed at you as you gave him a confused look. He fished his phone out of his pocket and opened the camera app. “Don’t move.”
"Baby, no, I don't have any makeup on..." You protested and started walking towards him to block the lens with your hands. “Don’t take any pictures of me, please.”
He pouted like an annoying grumpy child. “Just one? The view is great, look!”
"Fine, just don’t put them on your Instagram." You gave up and posed for his camera.
Jaemin grinned and took this as an opportunity to do the most, he squatted down on the sand and positioned his phone to get a good capture of you standing with a background of the sun setting, the sky almost dark. He smiled to himself in satisfaction, scrolling through the pictures he just took and proudly showed them to you.
"AirDrop that one to me later!" You pinched his cheeks and noticed his smile growing bigger.
"Come here.”
“What no—
“Selfie.”
Jaemin stood beside you and you smelt like the familiar shampoo, your skin glowed as the sun which was almost on the verge of getting lost into the horizon. He positioned the camera and smiled along with you. He clicked the first picture and positioned the phone again for the second one when you suddenly kissed him on the cheeks just when he tapped on the shutter.
“Let me see the picture!” You smiled widely and impatiently waited for Jaemin to unlock his phone and open his camera roll. And there it was, a blurry picture of you kissing him on the cheek captured onto his phone screen. “Send that to me as well, I’m gonna make it my home screen.”
“It’s blurry.”
“And?”
Jaemin inspected the picture for a while before concluding that it was indeed cute and you couldn’t stop grinning. He watched you and he wished he could make you smile like this everyday till his last breath.
AUGUST 25
It had officially been a year since you and Jaemin exchanged "I do’s" to each other in front of all your friends and relatives. You cringed at the thought of your wedding vows, the one which apparently made Jaemin shed some tears in front of everyone. It was shocking to think that you’ve somehow managed to complete a year with the love of your life and you couldn’t help but look forward to more. However, what excited you more was whatever Jaemin had planned for you tonight.
“What has the poor grass ever done to you?” Jaemin’s voice pulled you out of your train of thoughts outside the restaurant at the resort. Jaemin surprised you with a staycation at a lakeside resort and who were you to say no to espacing work even for just 24 hours.
“Huh? What?” You glanced at Jaemin behind you and he was too busy arranging his credit card in his wallet after paying for the over-expensive food you two just devoured. The black pants paired with the black dress shirt you got for him on his birthday made you weak at your knees. Probably it was just the wine flowing through your system but you couldn’t stop staring at him under the dim lights of the corridor outside the outdoor restaurant.
“You were just,” Jaemin paused to laugh. “Just staring at the grass like this.” He widened his eyes dramatically to mock you and you smacked his forearm.
You replied with a throaty chuckle, “I was just…thinking.”
“About?”
“I feel bad about leaving Yiseul with your mom. I told you we should just leave her at my mom’s place instead. I don’t want your mom to take the hass—
“Don’t worry about mom. She’s probably sitting on the couch with her on the lap and watching dramas right now.” Jaemin pinched your cheeks and leaned in to press a kiss. “Let’s go to the bar!”
“Now?!”
“Duh, it’s not everyday that we get to drink freely like a wild teenager. Let’s go!” Jaemin’s hand found themselves intertwined with yours as he dragged you down the corridor which lead to the dimly lit bar.
You were sure Jaemin was going to be tipsy by the end of the night and your hunch became the reality when he leaned up against the door to your hotel room. "Hey," You could tell he was drunk from the way his cheeks were flushed. "Do you have the key card thingy?"
"Yeah," You answered, as you started rummaging through your purse. "Here," you started to hand it over to him, then pulled it back. "Wait. Let me do it instead."
"You always do it too fast."
"No, I don't." You shoved the key card in the slot and whipped it out. You both watched as the little red light came on.
"Baby. See?" Jaemin was trying not to laugh as he used the wall for support. How many cocktails did he drink? You lost count after his third glass, but you suspected it might have been more by the way he wanted to giggle at everything — including you struggling with the door. Not that you weren’t tipsy as well but thankfully your alcohol tolerance had always been stronger than his.
"It's fine." She does it again and once again, the red light blinks. "Fuc—"
Jaemin laughed at your words, as if you just said the funniest thing ever, and took the keycard from you. He gave you a grin. "Here. Let me show you how it's done, baby." Jaemin’s eyes stayed on your the whole time as he very slowly slid the card into the slot, waited a beat, then slowly pulled it out. Jaemin smirked at you just a bit as the green light went on.
"Okay, fine. Get in here," You grabbed him by the collar and pulled him into the room.
As soon as the door shut, you were kissing. Sloppy, enthusiastic, drunken kisses that left you both breathless. There was something exciting about being in a hotel room, you couldn’t figure out whether it were the memories from college — the memories from the cheapest room you two could find a few years ago in contrast to one of the most expensive suites at the hotel you were in right now.
"You should do it.” Jaemin blurted out suddenly.
"Do what?" You halted unbuttoning his shirt.
"No, I mean," Jaemin paused. "Well, submit the design of yours."
“Fuck, I forgot to tell you.” You pulled away and sat on the edge of the bed, excited to tell him about your work. “I submitted my design last Tuesday! We will get the results on the 31st.”
Jaemin’s eyes widened. "Really?"
"Yeah," You waited a second longer to gauge his reaction. "How do you feel about that?"
"You're going to be such a hot, sexy senior architect and designer.”
"Don’t say senior like that, I didn’t get the promotion yet."
"You'll get it. I’ve seen you work hard every single day and night." He kissed you and you melted under his touch. “Have you considered designing our luxurious house with two floors and a backyard with a swimming pool in 5 years?”
“Yeah, with a jacuzzi and a movie theatre as well.” You rolled over on the bed, your legs still dangling off the bed and you two high-five, both dissolved into laughter. “You've got my lipstick on your lips.”
Jaemin laughed and wiped his mouth with the back of his palm. “Come here.”
You leaned into him, arms wrapping around his middle, and gave him a big grin from under his arm. “I love you,” you said, easily and happily. “Happy anniversary to us, I guess.”
Jaemin on the other hand couldn’t keep the smile off his face, the alcohol in his bloodstream contributing to his sudden giggly attitude. “I love you too. Sorry we couldn’t be at some fucking fancy resort at, I don’t know, maybe Greece.” Jaemin had slightly started slurring now. “Next year, when we’re not the busiest people on Earth, we’re definitely going on a Europe trip.”
“We will think about next year later, let me enjoy this first.” You squeaked when his hands found your waist. Before you could reply, Jaemin had already started kissing along your neck. You moaned and you're arching back against him.
“Did you bring it? I told you last ni-
“Inside the luggage.” You breathed against his lips after he pulled away. Jaemin placed one last kiss on your forehead and got up to retrieve the thing you have been looking forward to since the night before. You giggled while Jaemin nearly tripped in front of the bed.
You gulped when he placed the pink bullet vibrator with a string attached to it at the end on the nightstand and crawled over to you. His wedding ring was visible as he ran his finger up your thigh, underneath your thigh length black dress. You shivered under his touch, goosebumps forming on your skin. Maybe it was because you were tipsy but you wanted him so bad at that moment — it was driving you crazy. “You look so-
“Handsome?” Jaemin interrupted, winking one eye. “Beautiful? The hottest man in town? The best husband ever?”
“I was gonna say sexy…”
“Well come here and give your sexy a kiss then.” Jaemin didn’t need to ask twice. Your red lipstick smeared under the press of his mouth, tongues dancing together in a familiar way. When you break the kiss, you finally find your voice.
“My pretty wife,” He said, grinning widely.
“Yeah, thank you.” You replied dramatically, eyes rolling.
“I’m not done teasing yet by the way.” You could only make an unintelligible noise as he flipped you over on to your back and kissed you again. His fingers made the quick work of unzipping your dress and unhooking your bra, and he had you bare and writhing under him within minutes.
“Would you like your present now?” Jaemin breathed, his lips inches from the soft skin of your neck. You only nodded your head and Jaemin retrieved the pink vibrator from the nightstand and flicked the switch, bringing it to life immediately.
“Happy anniversary,” He grinned and pressed the tip of the rumbling vibrator against your clit. You squealed and wriggled away from him as he snickered. “What?” Jaemin continued laughing and you broke into laughter as well. “Come back here.”
“It fucking tickles!”
“Do you trust me?”
You nodded quickly. “Yeah.”
“Then relax,” Jaemin caressed your thigh. “We’ve done this before.”
“That was more than a year ago actually.” You reminded him and he playfully smacked you in the thigh.
“Just trust me.”
You inhaled a heavy breath and collapsed back on to the pillows, biting your lip as Jaemin bent his head to kiss the inside of your thighs. His fingertips stroked the soft skin around your centre, and you felt yourself begin to melt into a puddle of need. It never took him long to have you gasping; he knew just how to touch you by now and exactly what you liked. When his tongue found your core, you called his name and arched your back, toes curling into the sheets.
After a few minutes, Jaemin stilled his tongue and asked you to close your eyes. You obeyed, sinking into the darkness behind your eyelids, only to shutter them open again, shrieking, when he inserted the cold vibrator fully into your wet pussy in one swift movement.
“Shhh,” Jaemin said softly. “Trust me.”
“This shit is cold.” You giggled nervously.
“I’ll warm you up,” Jaemin smirked and flicked the switch at the highest speed. The buzz filled the room and cried out at the sensation inside you. He bent his head to trail the inside of your thighs with kisses, reaching just below your core where the vibrator was rumbling furiously. You felt something uncurling deep in the pit of your stomach, climbing higher and higher. Your palms found themselves over your mouth, not wanting to disturb the other guests at the resort. You whimpered his name over and over again, your voice almost unrecognisable. Jaemin held you firmly in place when you started squirming, his fingers digging into your hips so hard that you were sure you'd have bruises in the morning.
“T-Too much—fuck!” You were unable to form coherent sentences and Jaemin was having the best time of his life.
You really wanted to punch the smirk off his pretty face but right now all you could think about was how it felt beyond incredible. You were whimpering, sobbing and then finally, your release reached its peak, harder than you think it had ever had in your life. Jaemin on the other hand started circling around your swollen clit and you arched your back only to fall back on your elbows, hips jerking up as you chased your high. “My baby is close…”
“Ja—Oh fuck.” You mewled as your first orgasm of the night took over you. Jaemin continued to circle around your clit till it all became too much and you pulled the vibrator by the string out of you yourself and tried to swat his hands away, while you twisted into the pillows, sobbing into them. “I-I can’t…I can’t.”
“Was that too much?” He kissed you on the shoulder and caressed your back. “We’re not even done yet, baby.” God, the cockiness in his voice, you really wanted to punch him at that moment — but he made you so, so good, you didn’t have any complaints.
“Just don’t fucking overstimulate me again…” You replied with a weak chuckle, trying to catch your breath. “I would’ve probably squirted if that vibrator stayed in there for more than 5 seconds.”
“I should’ve stopped you from taking it ou—” You smacked his thigh with a gasping chuckle. “Damn, sorry.”
“There’s no way I’m doing that in a hotel room.”
“Why not? Pretty sure the staff have seen worse.”
“No seriously, just—” You got up and kissed his mouth shut passionately. Jaemin didn’t give you much time to stay still because he got down on his knees on the carpeted floor and pulled you to the edge of the bed by your thighs. “I know you’re not doing what I think you’re about to do.”
“Yes, that’s exactly what I’m doing.”
“Get a towel from the luggage, I’m begging.”
“We don’t need it.” Jaemin replied from in between your thighs. You really couldn’t tell if he was being oblivious on purpose to fuck with you or he really just didn’t know. “It only happened once.”
“Do you know my body more than m—why are we having this conversation with you in between my legs?”
“If you’re so worried about the hotel staff, I’ve got a solution for you. Call the staff and say that we accidentally spilled our beer and then there you go, new bed sheets.” Jaemin chortled. “Now, please let me just do this.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me—ah” You felt his warm tongue glide through your sensitive folds, and you threw your head back at the sensation. Your toes curled as his tongue continued circling around your sensitive nub causing you to buck your hips forward, fingers making their way into his hair. When you felt him push his two fingers inside and your walls clutched them, hips lifting as your back pressed deeper into the mattress, helping him get a better angle at that one spot.
“You’re so eager, I just started and you’re already close to cumming?” All you could do was moan as he added another third finger, scissoring them and stretching your walls, the movement having you gushing on his hand. “You’re my pretty baby,” he was speaking softly, desire clear in his low voice.
“Jaemin, please,” was all you could muster, your mind clouded from the pleasure. He obliged and pushed them in and out of you faster and faster. You felt pressure building up in your lower abdomen, tightening and threatening to burst with each of his thrusts. Your hands were gripping desperately at the sheets, as your walls were clenching frantically.
Jaemin’s other hand reached for your clit, rubbing it and after a moment you felt the tight coil in your core snap. He pulled out his fingers, as the pressure released in the form of clear liquid bursting from your pussy and splashing onto his lap and some on the sheets. Your body was shaking, your mind numb from the overwhelming pleasure.
“You’ve really made a mess,” Jaemin laughed, landing a hard slap on your ass. You let out a cry at the unexpected pain, but it soon mixed with pleasure as he began placing soft kisses on the reddened skin. You were always taken aback by this side of Jaemin when he channelled it once in a while. It was almost like an alter ego of his, a contrast to his jolly personality in front of the world, only for you to see.
“We’re still not done yet.” A second slap landed on your other ass-cheek, soon followed by an array of kisses. Your cries turned louder, as a couple more spanks decorated your skin, leaving behind the outline of his large palms. You felt your walls clench again, his words serving to arouse you further. “Can you cum again?”
You panted and snickered, raising yourself onto your elbows. “Too sensitive, maybe wait for a few minutes.”
Right after the words left your mouth, Jaemin rolled you onto your back. In an instant, his lips were crashing with yours, the intensity of the kiss taking you by surprise and your mouth opening to his tongue without any protest. You felt him trace lines with his fingertips along your stomach and chest, settling to your tits, pinching your nipples, and twisting them, your whimpers and cries swallowed by his mouth.
“Can you just fuck me now?” You whined as he pulled away.
“Weren’t you just saying you’re too sensitive?” Jaemin smirked.
“Shut up…”
“Alright.” Jaemin smirked and started unbuttoning his shirt and threw it on the floor beside the bed. You took in his sculpted chest, the way in which his muscles moved under his skin made your mouth water. He moved between your legs, spreading your thighs and placing them on his shoulders. He grabbed your ass, lifting your hips off the mattress as he aligned his cock with the entrance to your core. “Ready?”
You nodded, trying to push your hips forward in an attempt to feel more of him. His fingers dug into your hips at your movement which were definitely leaving marks for you to see in the morning.
“P-please, I need you,” you pleaded, clenching around nothing. He was so close yet so far and you needed to feel him inside you. Your pussy ached and you didn’t know how much more you could take. Jaemin leaned down to move your disheveled hair out of your and kissed you one last time on the forehead. He started pushing his cock inside you slowly and your toes curled. You closed your eyes, the way your insides were spread overwhelming you.
“That’s my baby,” Jaemin grunted as he pushed himself entirely inside you, as you squirmed at the sudden movement, walls clenching around his cock. “You’re taking me so well…” He praised as he started thrusting inside you, each movement eliciting moans and whimpers from you. You bit on your hand, trying to keep your moans down, not wanting to disturb the guests in the next room. Your skin felt like it was on fire, the way his tip pressed your sensitive spot driving you crazy, tears welling up at the corner of your eyes.
“I’m going to c-cum again.” You managed to barely form the words between your moans. He quickened the pace, his hips crashing onto yours as you felt your orgasm wash over you, making your whole body shake as your mind went blank. You were unable to let out even a whimper, the pleasure from the climax overpowering for a few moments, even your need to breathe.
Jaemin continued to fuck you through your orgasm, spurred on by the lewd expressions on your face till he emptied himself inside of you, painting for your walls white. Your legs wouldn’t stop shaking from the intensity as he suddenly placed them on the bed on either side of his hips.
Before you realized what he was doing, you felt his warm tongue on your clit again, two fingers buried deep inside, pushing his cum in, curling and trying to draw another orgasm from your now overly-sensitive pussy. “I-I…cant anymore,” you cried as your hands sunk in his hair. “T-too much, Jae—please.”
Jaemin didn’t stop even as you tugged at his hair— an half-hearted attempt to get him to stop, as you weren’t even sure you even wanted him to. He bit your nub gently, sucking on it and licking, his fingers continuing to move at the same pace as the volume of your cries rose, your body shaking. Your hips started moving on their own, meeting the thrust of his fingers as you climaxed for the fourth time.
You probably blacked out for a few seconds because the next thing you heard was Jaemin falling flat on the bed next to you, his breathing rapid, sweat dripping from his body. He started caressing your side lovingly and placed a kiss on your shoulder. “Sorry.”
Turning on your side to face him, you intertwined your hands with his, humming, “I just had the best sex of my life, shut up.”
Jaemin laughed, planting a kiss on the top of your head as his hand was stroking your hair. A few minutes passed in blissful silence before he spoke again. “Let’s go take a bath, it would be easier to clean up now than in the morning. I need to take off the sheets and call the staff as well.”
He came back to the bed after a while, picked you up gently and helped you steady yourself, handing you the glass of water. “Thank you,” you muttered lightly, your legs were wobbly which he noticed and picked you up bridal style, carrying you to the bathtub that was already filled with warm water.
“I love you, baby. Are you sure you’re alright and I didn’t go too far?” He asked again, crouched down beside the bathtub, adamant to make sure you were indeed okay.
“Jaemin, two slaps on my ass isn’t gonna kill me.” You chuckled as your body relaxed in the warm bath. He kissed your hands and stood up straight again. “They’re gonna come to take the sheets soon, let me go and clean up the room a little.”
You giggled to yourself and he frowned. “What are you laughing at?”
“Just imagining myself as the staff.” You continued laughing, punching his arm lightly. “They’re not dumb.”
“As I said, they’ve seen worse.” Jaemin shrugged. “Didn’t you see how many couples there were during dinner?”
“You’re so silly sometimes,”
“I love you.” He crouched down again and whispered into your hair, before kissing you in the temple. “Happy one year to us.”
You splashed water at him, “I love you too, my cutie.”
AUGUST 31
The evening air was cool as the strong breeze nipped at Jaemin’s skin from the open window inside his car. It was one of those days when you had to leave early in the morning, carpooling with Jisu and Yeji and Jaemin had to pick you up later in the evening. He was leaning on the leather car seat behind the wheel, too distracted with his phone to notice you slowly making your way to the car. You coughed loudly once you were close enough and his head shot up at you, a small smile already forming in his lip when he saw your face.
"Hey." Jaemin greeted you as you opened the door to the passenger seat. “How did it go?”
You don't answer and Jaemin already knew your project didn’t go well. He hummed as he watched you sit down and take a deep breath. You fastened the seatbelt and Jaemin glanced at you one last time before he started the car. "I got food for you." Jaemin motioned at the chicken nuggets and fries along with a bouquet of peonies neatly placed at the back seat.
“Flowers again?”
“Last one for the year, they’re going out of season soon.”
"I didn’t get the promotion." You broke the silence, taking a bite of the nugget as you watched Jaemin drive, admiring the way his profile glowed whenever he drove past street lights and well lit convenience stores, "They said my design was way too minimalistic.”
"Were you happy with your design?" Jaemin asked, not taking his eyes off the road. The sky rumbled above followed by a lightning strike. “Amazing, it’s gonna rain.” He muttered under his breath.
"Yeah, I was.” You chuckled lightly. “I really liked the design for the living room. Too bad I can’t submit it anywhere else now.”
“That’s what matters the most.” Jaemin replied, glancing at you for a second with a smile as his free hand intertwined with yours. “It’s truly their loss, I thought the design was perfect.”
You didn’t reply, instead you chuckled and leaned over to peck Jaemin gently on his cheek when he stopped at the red lights. “Thank you. I don’t care about the promotion, it's not like my salary was gonna increase.”
“Who got the promotion?”
“Yeji did, but her design was like, very luxurious.” You leaned back against the leather and looked up at the sky through the window when it rumbled again. “I don’t think anyone with a budget of less than $10-20 million can get her design.”
Jaemin proudly grins. “Any idea of how much your one might’ve been?”
“Budget?”
Jaemin hummed in reply.
“Probably a million or two? It had multiple window walls and—
“That’s it. It’s gonna be ours in a few years.” Jaemin replied so casually, you had to raise your head from the comfort of the seat to look at him in disbelief.
“What?”
Jaemin glanced at you from the corner of his eye, “What?”
You scrunched your brows together. “So, you’re saying that we’re gonna live in a million dollar penthouse in a few years?”
“That’s exactly what I said, yes.”
“Nice.”
Jaemin’s fingers tapped against the steering wheel in time to the song he had softly playing out of the radio and he turned his head and gave you an odd look. “Nice? You’ve got nothing else to say?”
You truly got over your fear of commitment, thanks to the man beside you. Nothing seemed scary in life anymore when you knew he was going to be by your side through thick and thin, no matter what. Unknowingly you started, “I fucking love you so much, it drives me crazy sometimes. Have I mentioned that before?”
Jaemin’s eyes widened and he was grateful his car was stuck in the traffic at that moment or else he would’ve pressed the brake pedal in the middle of the road. “That was so random…”
“Sorry, ignore me, my mind is going haywire right now.” You pulled your hands away from his and hid your face in the palm of your hands. “I need some fucking sleep.”
“It’s September tomorrow.”
You groaned. “Don’t remind me.”
Jaemin stopped the car in front of your apartment and unbuckled his seat belt. “I love you too, by the way.”
notes/warnings; unprotected sex, reader is on the pill mentioned, sexual health mentioned, oral (f receiving), fingering, praising kink, size kink, bulge kink, dirty talk, cream pie, jeno has a huge cock
word count; 4.3k and some change
NCT Dream: Roomies Series Master List
Jeno glances at the watch on his arm, checking his time as he runs. Music blares in his ears as he mutters along, not really paying attention where he was going. He knew his way with his eyes closed. He ran the same path every morning, and it was always the same. That is why when the dog runs towards him when he looks up, he lets out a gasp, having to grab onto the bench to steady himself so he wouldn’t fall when he stops suddenly.
“Shit…uh hi, pup.” His eyes watch the small white dog as it runs up to him, pawing at his legs, wanting to be pet. Sighing a bit, Jeno kneels down and runs a hand over the dog’s head with a grin on his face. He loves dogs, but it then dawns on him that this one is missing it’s owner. “Where’s your owner?”
His hand sliding around the collar, Jeno picks up the name tag and smiles when he reads off “Nugget”, only to see the dog wag his tail. Turning the tag over, he reads the name “Y/N Y/L/N”. He nods and starts to take his phone out of his pocket, when he hears someone yelling the name he had just read, and the dog’s ears perk up. “That must be your mom, huh?”
“You look so pretty like this,” Jeno sighed, his eyes dark and hooded.
“Like this?” You giggled, swiveling your hips where you were seated on his lap, your panties pulled to the side while Jeno was fully naked beneath you, leaning back against the headboard of his bed.
Groaning, your boyfriend pressed his fingers more firmly into the dip of your waist.
“The pink matches your blush,” you smiled, referring to the cute bralette you were wearing that had been the reason for this whole situation. That alone was enough for the blush on Jeno’s face and neck to deepen and you couldn’t help but to coo at him, winding your arms around his shoulders.
“Or should I say the pink of your cock?” As if to show him, you slowly raised your hips before dropping back down in one swift movement, making you both moan loudly.
You kept your rhythm slow and the grind of your hips sensual, soft gasps filling the room as you shared sweet kisses while Jeno’s hands never stopped caressing your body.
Sighing, you threaded your hands into his hair to encourage him to kiss down your neck, his teeth softly grazing the skin.
“Hmm, feels good,” you sighed, our hips almost coming to a stop as you focused on the feeling of his lips on your skin.
“Let me make you feel even better,” Jeno breathed into your skin before slowly slipping the straps of your bralette down your shoulder, leaving kisses along the way until he could free your boobs, bunching up the fabric below them.
Locking eyes with you, he slowly circled his tongue around your nipple before he gently bit down on it, making sparks of pleasure run down your spine.
“So pretty like this,” you praised him, stroking his bangs from his eyes.
Jeno just hummed lowly in his throat, taking his sweet time to suck and kiss your nipples and boobs until they were shiny with his saliva and so sensitive, even his hot breath over them made you shudder.
“I love you,” you softly whispered.
After a semester overseas, Zhong Nami has returned to Seoul where her twin brother, his best friends, and a certain bright-eyed boy, stay. Never one to stay in a city for too long, Nami’s world is turned upside down when she meets Na Jaemin. With a love for running away, will Jaemin convince Nami to stay, or drive her to flee?
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