Jaz Asher

She/They, early 30s, fan of dropout, Kpdh, supergirl, the good place, critical role, and more

[jazasher]

I am feeling a way and I need to shout out fanfic authors. Shout out/Kudos to the authors who are able and willing to updating their fics weekly/multiple times a month. Shout out/Kudos to the authors who after weeks/months/year plus get inspired or motivated and drop an update to their fic. Shout out/Kudos to the authors who were able to complete their fic (it was wonderful so you be nice to yourself!) Shout out/Kudos to the author who had to/wanted to step away from their fic and it stays incomplete (it may never get completed but I promise it was so worth the read you did great!) In short a shout out/kudos to all fanfic authors cause you all are PROVIDING and deserve much love.

[jazasher]

I have noticed a few times in Polytrix fics that an author tags both Hurt/Comfort AND Hurt No Comfort. Is there an author or AO3 understanding tags-er that can break down to me like I’m stupid why someone would tag both? My view is that either there IS comfort or there ISN’T comfort so I don’t understand tagging both and it makes me uncertain what kind of fic I will be getting if I read it.

[mevil]

being black in any art community is such a strange feeling cause you’ll see just blatant racism being expressed in others art and you have to just casually ignore it, for your sake if anything, colorism being something that’s just fundamentally there in every artist and you deal with it cause it’s not worth it in the end to even think of it too hard let alone even mentioning it, it’s definitely something

[creatingblackcharacters]

Hello nonblack reader of this post, I think you ought to share this one so that you and your peers can actively remind yourselves 1) of how your Black peers feel when you tolerate antiblack racism in your art spaces for entertainment and 2) that we notice it, but don't believe it is secure around enough of you to bring it up 🙏🏾

[jazasher]

I love the thought of a kpop demon hunters and KDA cross over. Where Rumi gets like adopted by Ahri and away from Celine. Learns to accept her patterns sooner. Akali and Kai’sa as mentors to Zoey and Evelyn mentoring Mira. I just love the thought of a cross between the 2 groups.

[beardedmrbean]

[theman]

I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF

[tattooedzombigirl]

This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.

[imanutcase-10]

Then bring me luck

[thirddeadlysin]

the day after I posted this last time I was notified that I was selected for a really cool mentorship gig and got an unrelated glowing review at work

[jackdaw-kraai]

And notice the potato doesn’t guilt you with “if you don’t, something horrible will happen.” Potato wouldn’t betray you like that, because potato is a refined person of good humor and character, and understands that, sometimes, a visit to your dashboard just isn’t convenient right now. Sometimes you just went on a fandom gif reblogging spree or your energy is low, you do not have the time to make your dashboard suitable to guests, and a polite visit just isn’t in the cards. Potato understands this, and doesn’t get upset, or gods forbid, throws a tantrum and wishes ill on your household. Instead, Potato merely stores away their blessings for a later visit and leaves as a good friend should.

Be like Potato. Be a good friend.

[hamletthedane]

Want to learn something new in 2022??

Absolute beginner adult ballet series (fabulous beginning teacher)

40 piano lessons for beginners (some of the best explanations for piano I’ve ever seen)

Excellent basic crochet video series

Basic knitting (probably the best how to knit video out there)

Pre-Free Figure Skate Levels A-D guides and practice activities (each video builds up with exercises to the actual moves!)

How to draw character faces video (very funny, surprisingly instructive?)

Another drawing character faces video

Literally my favorite art pose hack

Tutorial of how to make a whole ass Stardew Valley esque farming game in Gamemaker Studios 2??

Introduction to flying small aircrafts

French/Dutch/Fishtail braiding

Playing the guitar for beginners (well paced and excellent instructor)

Playing the violin for beginners (really good practical tips mixed in)

Color theory in digital art (not of the children’s hospital variety)

Retake classes you hated but now there’s zero stakes:

Calculus 1 (full semester class)

Learn basic statistics (free textbook)

Introduction to college physics (free textbook)

Introduction to accounting (free textbook)

Learn a language:

Ancient Greek

Latin

Spanish

German

Japanese (grammar guide) (for dummies)

French

Russian (pretty good cyrillic guide!)

[hamletthedane]

Want to learn something new in 2023??

Cooking with flavor bootcamp (used what I learned in this a LOT this year)

Beekeeping 101

Learn Interior Design from the British Academy of Interior Design (free to audit course - just choose the free option when you register)

Video on learning to read music that actually helped me??

How to use and sew with a sewing machine

How to ride a bike (listen. some of us never learned, and that's okay.)

How to cornrow-braid hair (I have it on good authority that this video is a godsend for doing your baby niece's black hair)

Making mead at home (I actually did this last summer and it was SO good)

How to garden

Basics of snowboarding (proceed with caution)

How to draw for people who (think they) suck at art (I know this website looks like a 2003 monstrosity, but the tutorials are excellent)

Pixel art for beginners so you can make the next great indie game

Go (back) to school

Introduction to Astronomy (high school course - free textbook w/ practice problems)

Principals of Economics (high school course - free textbook w/ practice problems)

Introduction to philosophy (free college course)

Computer science basics (full-semester Harvard course free online)

Learn a language

Japanese for Dummies (link fix from 2022)

Ukrainian

Portuguese (Brazil)

American Sign Language (as somebody who works with Deaf people professionally, I also strongly advise you to read up on Deaf/HoH culture and history!)

Chinese (Simplified)

Quenya (LOTR fantasy elf language)

[hermscat]

Reblogging to remind myself that retirement is the perfect time for some of these!

[politicalprof]

Well, you know, some bathroom graffiti offers insight.

[madfishmonger]

Red marker handwriting on a bathroom wall. Text reads:

“Boss made a dollar Granddad made a dime But that was a poem From a simpler time.

Boss made a thousand Gave pa a cent But that penny paid the mortgage Or at least it paid the rent

Now Boss makes a million And gives us jack Smugly blames the workers For the labor that he lacks.”

[menlove-archive]

honest to god can’t stop thinking about this song about jeff bezos by philip labes (link takes you to his spotify). it’s such a good example of politically driven folk music.

[kaizykat]

Lyrics:

Jeff found a genie in a bottle Who said, “I can give you anything you ask” “You can have your wishes three And a million more for free It’s unlimited, just set me to the task.”

Well, Jeff thought a while, Said, “I want houses, “I want boats, I want fancy modern art, I want tickets to the Met, I want my own private jet, And a rocket into space just for a start.”

Well, the genie waved her arms and made it happen His every wish bolted from the blue And folks all over town grew enamored, gathered ‘round To admire the man whose wishes had come true

They said, “Let’s hear it for the man who has everything! By good fortune he’s been set so far apart.” “Yeah, let’s hear it for Jeff who has everything! ‘Cause his wishes are only at the start.”

Well, Jeff heard their shouts and he grew worried He said, “Everybody’s getting in my way.” The genie smiled as before, “You’ve got a million wishes more. You can even give a bunch of them away.”

Well, Jeff got confused and sorta quiet ‘Til he finally said, “I have just one wish more.” “I am satisfied, so I wish that you would die So you cannot grant wishes anymore.”

Well, the genie’s eyes got big and sad and shiny ‘Til she finally said, “Your wish is my command.” And with an effervescent sigh, she disappeared before his eyes And no wishes were ever granted there again

So, let’s hear it for the man who has everything! By good fortune he has set so far apart Yeah, let’s hear it for Jeff, who’s got everything! Every single fucking thing except a heart

[wordsmithic]

[ultrafacts]

Source 

[hellkatsally]

These dudes are fucking legit.  They don’t just show up one day in court, either, they actually make friends with the kids and let them know they have a support system and that there are people in the world who care about them and will always have their back.  And less important, but also cool, is that the few times a couple of them have come into my cafe, they’ve been super friendly and polite and when I told one of the guys that I noticed his Bikers Against Child Abuse patch and wanted him to know how awesome I thought he was because of it, he got kind of shy and blushed and said, “The kids are the awesome ones, we just let them know they’re allowed to be brave.”

[bebinn]

The source is long, but so, so good. These men and women are available in 36 states, 24 hours a day to stand guard at home, in court, at school, even if the child has a nightmare. Many of them are survivors of childhood abuse as well, and know what it’s like to feel scared and alone.

In court that day, the judge asked the boy, “Are you afraid?” No, the boy said.

Pipes says the judge seemed surprised, and asked, “Why not?”

The boy glanced at Pipes and the other bikers sitting in the front row, two more standing on each side of the courtroom door, and told the judge, “Because my friends are scarier than he is.”

[lesbian-moon-gf]

Actual tears.. hnngh

[bee-whistler]

Show me more of people like this, world. I give up on humans too easily.

[groovypirate]

where do i sign up for this,i want to be in this gang

[ultrafacts]

[haydengisearchive-deactivated20]

This is fucking amazing. It may be out of character for me to say this but rock on

[clatterbane]

Bikers Against Child Abuse was founded in 1995 by a Native American child psychologist whose ride name is Chief, when he came across a young boy who had been subjected to extreme abuse and was too afraid to leave his house. He called the boy to reach out to him, but the only thing that seemed to interest the child was Chief’s bike. Soon, some 20 bikers went to the boy’s neighborhood and were able to draw him out of his house for the first time in weeks.

Chief’s thesis was that a child who has been abused by an adult can benefit psychologically from the presence of even more intimidating adults that they know are on their side. “When we tell a child they don’t have to be afraid, they believe us,” Arizona biker Pipes told azcentral.com. “When we tell them we will be there for them, they believe us.” ( Article)

More about BACA, from their site

[uriesays]

My parents are a part of this organization and they are metal af

They go on runs to protect the child if they feel even the slightest threatened no matter where. If the child needs them to go on vacation with them, they do. Bikers come from across the nation to watch over and take shifts for these kids. And the best part is once you’re adopted into this family as a BACA kid, you’re always one. Even when you’re 40 and the perp gets released from jail, they’ll come meet with you and find your best options for avoiding the person and maintaining the life you’ve built for yourself. Once a BACA child, always a BACA child. In Florida, there’s 100% rate for identifying the perp based on the child’s testimony. Why? Because BACA stands with the child and supports the child so they feel comfortable enough to point out their attacker.

What’s better than a badass biker gang being on your side???

[kikithegirl]

NATIVE AMERICAN CHILD PSYCHOLOGIST WHO IS A BIKER AND NAMED HIMSELF CHIEF HELL YES I’M HERE FOR THAT AND BIKERS BEING BAD ASS TO PROTECT KIDS. HELL YEAH.

[birdungehrl]

it’s back! I will always reblog BACA

[your-uncle-dave]

Damn good people.

[rowsdower-saves-us]

I know they wouldn’t consider themselves such, but these people are freaking heroes and the world is a better place because of them. 

[racethewind10]

Hey folks, it talks about this in the article but its not mentioned in this post, BACA is a 501 © (3) charity that depends in part on donations to help pay for stuff like gas for their bikes. If you want to help, consider donating. 

[drgaellon]

@copperbadge You like posting about heroes, Sam. Seems like this would be up your alley.

[copperbadge]

I love these folks! I’ve reblogged them before but it’s wonderful to see the donation information has been added. 

[galaxy-of-stories]

Always reblog. Keep doing what you’re doing y'all.

[hurtlittleboy]

Guys? This post changed my life. I saw this post. Forever ago. And thought it was only in america… and wished desperately that they could help me. But then I saw it again, during a bad episode, and checked their site. They aren’t just in the USA

They’re in Canada as well and probably other countries. I met and talked with a native guy who runs the place near me. His name is Shaman. I got in, and I’m considered a BACA child now. Despite being 17, turning 18 when I talked to them. They spent time with me when my abuser was over, they gave me therapy resources. They give you something called a ‘level 1′ where they go to your house with as many bikers as they can, i shit you not a solid 20-40 bikers came from even out of province, and met me. I got to choose my biker name and I got a vest with patches on it and my name on it. They all hugged a Teddybear before giving it to me, and told me if I ever felt the BACA bear was running out of love, to give them a call and they’d refill it for me, and then I got a ride on one of their bikes. Just a day or so ago I went to an annual party with them and they we ate food one of them cooked and had a lot of laughs. 

I’ve never felt as loved as I did being a part of the BACA family. They also gave me dog tags with the names, and phone numbers of my 2 workers.  So I can call them whenever I feel scared. 

BACA is an absolutely wonderful group that will do everything in it’s power to help any child whos been abused. 

And it doesn’t end when you’re 18 either. As long as you get in contact/get your level 1 before you’re 18? you’re ALWAYS a BACA kid. I’m 18 now and they still invite me to parties, ask me if I’m okay, and are there for me. They’re still trying to find me resources for therapy. 

BACA has changed my fucking life. 

I hope you all can read this, and reblog it knowing from someone who fucking been with them, that they are absolutely amazing. 

[feanor-the-dragon]

If I ever don’t reblog this, it’s because I am physically being restrained against my will.

[gasdiver2]

Supporting your local hero’s.

[darkangelfoundmyway-069]

FUCKEN AMAZING what these Bikers do!!!! This is why I don’t give up on humanity…

💞🖤💞 Carpe Diem 💞🖤💞

[instructor144]

[pottercastleminds]

Links the International BACA Chapters:

United States

Canada

Australia

Belgium

Denmark

Germany

Spain

France

Italy

Netherlands

Iceland

Austria

Greece

New Zealand

Portugal

Sweden

United Kingdom

Switzerland

B.A.C.A’s Byline: “Keepers of the Children.” B.A.C.A.’s Motto: “No child deserves to live in fear.”

Not all heroes wear capes, some wear biker vests.

[humanjoy]

Had seen this before, but never realised that this is on an international level - there’s even a contact address close to where I live (in Germany), very cool (though hoping the only use I’ll ever have to make of it is for donations) ❤

[lilmamabeyellin]

[itscoldinwonderland]

Different people respond better to different types of therapy, and most therapist will do multiple types of therapy with their patients.

CBT - Most common type of therapy because it works well for all mental health problems.

ACT - Especially helpful for treating anxiety disorders, depressive disorders, OCD, psychosis and substance abuse.

DBT - Specifically created for BPD. This type of therapy works really well for personality disorders, PTSD, eating disorders, substance abuse and impulsive control disorders.

Interpersonal therapy - Created to treat major depressive disorder but is now also used for other depressive and mood disorders.

There are lots of other types of therapy too (:

[tiiiiiired]

Gonna add my two cents as a research psychologist:

CBT does NOT work well if the individual has a history of being emotionally manipulated or gaslit, nor does it work well when the individual is working through traumas that have been used against them or disbelieved. CBT can feel like gaslighting, toxic positivity, denial of the seriousness of a situation, or emotional manipulation if not done very carefully. As such, it might be best to avoid it and find something else if you have a history of problems with the aforementioned experiences.

ACT also works REALLY WELL for individuals coping with sudden and "devastating" changes! It's often adapted for use by disability specific clinics to help newly diagnosed patients learn to cope with the limitations on their environments. People with disabilities (PWDs) tend to feel pressured to not express their disability related distress around non-PWDs and, as such, tend to see those feelings as shameful. There's a lot of "I should be more grateful" or "it's not as bad as it could be" feelings around disability as a result of this pressure and ACT is great for undoing them!

DBT is generally amazing for stress disorders and preventing stress disorder symptomatology in at risk populations. It teaches you stress tolerance skills and how best to avoid or diminish conflicts, allowing you to avoid the sorts of environmental triggers that commonly worsen stress disorder symptoms.

Interpersonal therapy is also great for neurodivergent folks, victims of childhood emotional abuse, and children of parents with untreated/unmanaged psychiatric disorders. Essentially, if you grew up with difficulty interacting effectively with and relating to others, interpersonal therapy can help you understand why and change those interactions in the future. Healthier relationships and social interactions are a great way to break the cycle of abuse for those of us raised by parents who were emotionally abusive and/or had untreated mental illnesses.

Since no one has mentioned it on this post, I'd like to add that most therapists these days practice a sort of integrative therapy. They'll take what they find most effective from each type of therapy for each individual problem, and piece together something a little more tailor made for their patients. This is part of why seeing an actual therapist is so important. Not every aspect of the aforementioned therapies will be relevant to every problem. Some aspects may even be harmful to handling some problems. The therapist is trained to pick out these things and adjust accordingly, unlike the average self help book or online resource. But knowing the types of therapies available and what you want to get from therapy is an immense part of finding a therapist that will suit your needs, so please research things carefully and think over what you need before selecting one!

Go to therapy, y'all!

[jointswhatjoints]

a great note on cbt - in the hands of the wrong therapists it can literally be gaslighting, especially if you have undiagnosed disabilities.

if you're someone feel like your therapist is denying your lived experience and minimising your struggles, find another one, and ideally see a doctor to make sure there isn't something physiological going on.

a lot of physical illnesses can mimic and cause psychological issues, and you can't really get proper help if the root cause is not addressed. you can seek out help without going to therapy.

(I'd also use "disabled people" and especially "abled people" rather than "pwd" and "non-pwd". disabled is not a dirty word, and non-pwd is othering just like non-poc or non-gay. not being disabled isn't a default state of being.)

[the-spoonie-life]

As another add on to this, if you find the type of counselling that’s being used for you doesn’t work that’s OK there’s loads of different types and you can look around and find one that works for you.

Most counsellors are taught CBT as a foundation of counselling as it has been around for so but don’t be afraid to say you don’t feel it’s working, they are there to help you.

[wasabiri]

Imagine that today you are in a place between Canada and Russia, and suddenly, for 30 seconds, the moon in its maximum splendor appears and disappears before you. In addition, for 5 seconds, it gives rise to a total solar eclipse. Something unheard of, right.

In perigee, the proximity to the Moon shows the great speed at which we move without feeling it.

It is recorded in real time.

The moon seen from the Arctic, North Pole, between Russia and Canada, only lasts a few seconds, but it is worth it, it is a beautiful sight, it seems that it collides with the earth, but no.

[mimeparadox]

What. The fuck.

[amber-gimlet]

#if i saw this in person id stop caring about everything elssee

[mtfoss]

Disabled people aren't being class traitors when they report on their civil rights and humanity being violated

[mtfoss]

You all need to be very very careful in these next couple of years to be extremely good allies to disabled people because it is very likely they are going to attempt to kill us and the way that's done in this country over the past few decades has been denying us access to necessary services and the money we need to acquire most of those services. So many people have died waiting on disability and the likelihood that this is going to get worse is very very high.

[mtfoss]

Hey, please take this seriously, this is me ringing the warning bell like I've done often over my life, I have been dismissed often and then have been proven by time to be correct. I would appreciate abled people sharing this.

[mtfoss]

[intersectionalism]

[zenkaiankoku]

This is torture. Solitary confinement for kids.

[striffyisme]

[ID: a white person in a blue FBI t-shirt, with long blonde hair and pink eye makeup, with the TikTok handle @elysian_cosplay. They sign as they speak, throughout the video. At some points, images appear behind them, of sources for the things they are discussing.

The CCs say: “Hey, I want to cover something important. As some of y'all know, I am deeply engrained in the Deaf culture because I want to be an interpreter, and I have Deaf family. The world is slowly becoming more accessible, and I am proud of our progress.

However, I want to discuss this school. This is the Memphis Oral School for the Deaf. The school will be opening soon, but they do not let their students sign, they discourage it. And now they require masks, which means Lipreading is out the window.

This article [there is an article on screen behind them] points out that even without masks, teachers would often cover their mouths when they spoke. So they couldn’t lip read. Their reasoning? To ensure that their students were “listening with their EARS”. Read that again.

You’re taking away their [Deaf children’s] language, they are not being given Dynamic Equivalence. They have nothing. When are y'all gonna learn that Deaf kids don’t need to be fixed? Please spread for awareness.“

End ID]

[krapulainen]

☝️ Straight from their own website. What the actual fuck.

[pbenjaminparkers]

[ID: A paragraph of black text with a blue header above it. The headers reads,

“Does MOSD use sign language?”

The paragraph reads,

“MOSD does not use sign language. Our mission focuses on the oral approach to deaf education. With early identification, early amplification, and early intervention, even the most profoundly deaf children can build the listening and language skills needed to mainstream into kindergarten with their hearing peers.”

End ID.]

[ameliawherever]

Cool cool cool, so they’re actually located in Germantown, which is not actually Memphis. 

And also, their history is fucking bullshit, ‘cause they claim the closest oral school in 1950-whatever was “more than five hours away”, however, not two and a half hours down the road is the Arkansas School for the Deaf in Little Rock that’s been here since before the Civil War in various iterations. 

AND the ASD teaches both oral and ASL, as well as other lessons in just general life skills, which is more than I got in the regular LRSD. 

So fuck that gentrified, ablest bullshit. 

Edit: Because Germantown is not Memphis. 

[iwatchforher]

bonus:

[vaspider]

After I had a doctor ruin my health, cost me years of my life, and nearly kill me by missing the diagnosis of a tumor which was compressing my spinal cord, I learned this script:

“I’m not here to talk about my weight; I’m here to talk about [problem]. I have a history of doctors focusing on my weight and ignoring problems like ‘a tumor in my spine,’ so I’m sure you’ll understand why I would prefer we did not ignore my stated complaint to focus on my weight instead.”

“I would like to focus on the complaint that brought me in today, which is [complaint], not my weight.”

“What tests or course of treatment would you recommend to a thin person presenting with my symptoms? Why are we not doing that? I would prefer to proceed with those tests and that course of treatment.”

“Please write in my chart that I asked you for these tests and course of treatment that you would give a thin patient with my symptoms, and you declined.”

“I’d like to request a copy of my visit notes from today,” [if the above don’t work and you don’t have MyChart, “what’s the correct email for my written request?”

It may be difficult to insist on a patient advocate to be in the room with you, but in many states you are legally entitled to one. I bring one of my partners bc I have medical-triggered PTSD. They know how to advocate for me or support me if a doctor tries to steamroll me..

If you are in a hospital situation and cannot get an official advocate in the room with you, ask for a chaplain. Chaplains are used to being in a room to comfort and help patients and in many circumstances, just having a witness in the room will change a doctor’s tune REALLY fast.

Medical fatphobia is a big problem, and it really heavily affects but is not restricted to people that doctors perceive to be women (whether or not those people are women). Don’t let yourself be bullied!

[brmanso27]

Humans are awesome

[ladydisdain81]

Alien 1: “So you see, this is why we do not provoke the humans.”

Alien 2: “Yes, this is an insightful battle simulation training recording.”

Alien 1: “You misunderstand. The humans are not battle training. They are doing those things for entertainment only. For fun.”

Alien 2: “…What?… for entertain… Even the human young?!”

Alien 1: “Yes.”

Alien 2: “I… I understand now.”

[stuffandatherstuff]

This is awsome holy fuck

[elvis-has-been-dug]

holy moly that’s neat

[dragonladdie]

Hey remember when they found over 200 bodies of native children buried behind a residential school and the world cared for... what, a week?

They've counted about 6,000-7,000 now, for those of you who do still care

[dragonladdie]

It should NOT fall on Indigenous people's shoulders to keep this known still. We’ve been doing that for generations at this point and NO ONE wants to listen to us.

We’re tired, mourning and constantly reopening our trauma and pain to keep people caring about us. It’s terrible.

[foxgirltail]

I should start by noting that I am white, and not Canadian, and that if op wants me to remove this comment for any reason, please let me know.

This is a map of all the residential schools in Canada:

[link to the article it’s attached to, it’s interactable there, so you can get a better look around]

Each dot on this map represents a residential school. Blue dots mean the school is considered completely searched. Yellow dots mean they are either in the process of being searched or there are plans to be searched. Red dots indicate that no search has happened and that no search is currently planned

There were more than 130 residential schools in Canada. This map suggests that only six have been fully searched, and a little more than a dozen partially searched (I counted 15 yellow dots). That leaves at least 109 schools completely untouched.

Let that sink in; if 6,000-7,000 unmarked, indigenous children’s graves were found by searching less than a fifth of all the schools, how many are still undiscovered.

Wikipedia estimates that the body count could be over 50,000, and honestly, that could be a low estimate

[eff-word]

I'd like to add that the map above is not 100% accurate. The 5 Residential School in Newfoundland and Labrador, which affected mainly Innu and Inuit communities, were not included in the original settlement deal made by the Government of Canada, and aren't included in many maps. The schools not included are:

Lockwood School (Cartwright, Labrador)

Makkovik Boarding School (Makkovik, Labrador)

Nain Boarding School (Nain, Labrador)

St. Anthony Orphanage and Boarding School (St. Anthony, Newfoundland)

Yale School: (Northwest River, Labrador)

@allthecanadianpolitics

[titkoks]

someone give him a grammy

[ringwraithmd]

In the notes I see the names of the songs, but for fun I looked at which lyrics went with which song. For anyone else who is curious, here it is: 

FIRST PERSON: I need you to make the longest mashup you can. 

SECOND PERSON: *finishing a sip of his beer - miller lite* *laughs* Shit okay *shifts in his chair to prepare*

SECOND PERSON: Three minutes? 

FIRST PERSON: Yea-up. 

SECOND PERSON: *begins, nodding his head*

I was riding shot gun with my hair undone in the front seat of his car —Our Song by Taylor Swift 

Singing life is one big party when you’re still young, but who’s gonna have your back when it’s —Angel by Shaggy feat. Rayvon

Stacks on deck, patron on ice, we can pop bottles all night—Whatever You Like by TI

And you can have a little chicken fried, cold beer on a Friday night -Chicken Fried by Zac Brown Band

I can’t tell you what it really is, I can only tell you what it feels like, and right now it’s a steel knife in my windpipe-Love the Way You Lie by Rihanna feat. Eminem

Buckle makes impressions on the inside of her thigh, yeah -Feathered Indians by Tyler Childers 

My baby don’t mess around because she loves me so and this I know for sure-Hey Ya! By OutKast

Never made it as a wise man, couldn’t cut it as a poor —How You Remind Me by Nickelback 

IF I COULD FIND YOU NOW THINGS WOULD GET BETTER—Ocean Avenue by Yellowcard

I get knocked down, but I get up again, ‘cause you’re never gonna keep me down-Tubthumping by Chumbawamba 

‘Cause Imma tell you, like Wu told me, cash rules everything around me—Sweetest Girl (Dollar Bill) by Wyclef Jean

IT’S A GREAT DAY TO BE ALIVE, I know the sun’s still shining when I close my eyes —It’s a Great Day to be Alive by Travis Tritt

To the left, to the left, everything you own in a box to the left —Take a Bow by Rihanna 

You find the spot and I’ll find the money, you be the pretty and I’ll be the funny --I’ll Name the Dogs by Blake Shelton

Had a barbecue stain on my white t-shirt, she was killing me in that miniskirt, yeah —Something Like That by Tim McGraw

Well I’m in love with the shape of you, you push and pull like a magnet —Shape of You by Ed Sheeran 

I promise, she’s so self-conscious, got no idea what she’s doing in college --All Falls Down by Kanye West feat. Syleena Johnson

I’m going down down baby your street in a Ranger, a street sweeper baby, cocked ready to let it go —Country Grammar (hot shit) by Nelly

My life is brilliant, my love is pure -Goodbye My Lover by James Blunt 

Hey soul sister, ain’t that mister mister on the —Hey Soul Sister by Train

Every morning there’s a halo hanging from the corner of my girlfriend’s four post bed —Every Morning by Sugar Ray 

Aw baby you, you got what I need —(You) Got What I Need by Freddie Scott

And you say he’s just a friend, and you say he’s just a friend – Just a Friend by Biz Markie

When I was a young boy, my father took me into the city, to see a marching band —Welcome to the Black Parade by My Chemical Romance 

I’m like a bird, I only fly away - I’m Like a Bird by Nelly Furtado 

I don’t know but hey, you’re crazy bitch but you’re so good I’m on top —Crazy Bitch by Buckcherry 

Wanna talk about me, wanna talk about I, wanna talk about number one oh my me my  —Wanna Talk About Me by Toby Keith 

I see no changes, wake up in the morning and I ask myself, is life worth living?—Tupac Shakur

‘Cause you had a bad day, taking one down, sing a sad song just to turn it around —Bad Day by Daniel Powter

Well tear my heart open, sew myself shut —Scars by Papa Roach

SECOND PERSON: Bitch

FIRST PERSON: Oh my gosh

SECOND PERSON: Bitch

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

You’ve done the lord’s work