Medicine for the Heart

Talk to me and find out :)

[jenniferphan95]

What happens when the comfortable stage becomes...too comfortable?

[jenniferphan95]

You did everything to get me. But now, don't you want to keep me...?

[meg-blog-main]

Excuse me while I spend my day being miserable because my Hogwarts letter still hasn’t arrived

[theintrovertnation]

Follow Introvert Nation @introvertproblems

[jenniferphan95]

Let me just run away. Run away far from here and never turn back. Almost never have I heard a praise from them. Perhaps twice a year or less. It's always "you said this wrong" or "you've done it wrong." I've never done the right things in their eyes. Always need to be improved. I'm fat, ugly, and stupid. Never saying the right things or doing the right things. I don't belong here, never have, never will. This is my family by blood and by name but why do I feel as if I'm only part of it by fate? But me, who I am, I don't belong here, not a part of this. This family is not for me. This is not where I belong. I just want to run away. Let me leave and never turn back, only when I am ready, when I am missed will I perhaps want to come back. Miles and miles away, let this place disappear in my rearview mirror.

[jenniferphan95]

Trying your best is never good enough for this damn family. Sometimes I just want to leave, run away and never come back. I want to escape, never see them again. Maybe call every once in a while, but never, ever come back. I just want to run... run away as far as I can. I don’t belong here, don’t belong in this family. I have no place here but where can I go? I’m not perfect, I can only try and trying is never good enough for this damn fucking family. No matter what I do, or how much I try, I’ll always end up doing something. I am always wrong, whether a little or a lot, what I do is never right. Always something to improve, never a word of praise. She’s  so goddamn perfect to them, but me, I’m wrong, always wrong. Always to be reprimanded, always to be taught, always lacking in something. I’m not smart, I’m stupid. I’m not like the others in this family, nothing to them. Please just leave me be, let me go. I want to go far from here, so far from here and never turn back. I’m so over this pretentious “happy family” shit. Why can’t we be real with each other and hate each other like we do. What’s with the pretentious gathering. the loving embraces, the cackling laughter. Just face it, you hate each other. We’re not the family we once were. As for me, I don’t fit in here, I don’t fit in anywhere so just let me run, let me go, let me run away.I want to leave. I don’t want to be here. I JUST WANT TO RUN AWAY. You people don’t care anyway. I’m not part of this family, not mentally, not emotionally, anyway. I’m not like the rest of you so why can’t you just leave me be?

[artistluv]

When the honeymoon stage ends what happens

…………

[ceraycarter]

You’re more honest with each other. Bodily functions are something to laugh about. Sweatpants and tee shirts are a regular thing. They know what you look like without all the makeup. Being “laid up and watching Netflix” is the only thing you’re looking forward to after work. You don’t go on fancy dates as often but you trade that for quality time. You find yourself being more vulnerable and you open up more. They become your best friend. You will able to talk about anything. You won’t be worried about impressing their parents, you’re just gonna love them anyway regardless of how their parents may feel. You will have inside jokes that no one else will get. Sex is not as often but, twice as passionate. Little fights will happen, but you’ll learn not to sweat the small stuff. You’ll learn what compromise really is about. You’ll dream about the future together. Grow together. Be on each other’s team. See their ugly crying face, and be the one to wipe the tears away & do something stupid to make them life. things are amazing after the honeymoon stage. However, it’s a time about giving up your walls and open up some doors you have locked a long time ago.

That’s why some people don’t make it past this point, because they don’t know what unconditional self-love means. Remain open and optimistic, love will never fail you.

[ceraycarter]

I love when this post resurfaces. It’s like a gentle reminder.

[morganevelten-deactivated202004]

[jenniferphan95]

concept

me, in the year 2040, getting ready for a fancy dinner party, standing in front of my antique gold vanity mirror, wearing a saint laurent f/w 2039 evening gown and cartier diamond earrings, taking a sip of champagne: what did you learn at school today, honey? :-)

my future child, laying on my king-sized bed with burgundy satin sheets: not much, in history we talked about the 2016 election. do you remember any of that?

me: drops my crystalline wineglass

[jenniferphan95]

@kidofsquid

[jvh1988]

Disney’s ‘Beauty and the Beast’ (2017), starring Emma Watson.

[micdotcom]

[tastefullyoffensive]

(via wednesdaay)

[jenniferphan95]

To say I miss you is an understatement. But how can I explain how hurt I am when all I’m trying to do is help and you refuse, even reject my help. It’s the only way I can show you I love you. I was hurt, so I was mad. At a moment’s time, I didn’t care, or didn’t want to care how your health fared. “Do whatever you want. I don’t care.” I say. When you rubbed your eyes, it was like you rubbed my heart away. I was upset. I did not want to speak to you. But to you, I was in the wrong? I can’t. I can’t not be angry so I refuse to speak to you. No. I’m so tired of having to explain to you, when I was clearly frustrated this morning. I shouldn’t have to tell you. Why can’t you understand?

[heathenwoods]

Do you know what I need? To escape into the mountains, surrounded by tall trees, I will lay on the moss, and breath in the scent of mushrooms, flowers and wet soil.

Le’echappee, LD (via letskeeplifesimple)

[blaineandersuns]

That girl goes through boys like Hogwarts goes through defense against the dark arts teachers.

[lupinmarauds-blog]

So, one boy a year? And each one unique, diverse and interesting? Good for her.

[bryoria]

#idk that first guy was soo two faced (x)

[cultural-memeist-blog]

And the second was SUCH a poser.

[stonecobra]

The third was pretty cool. Complete animal sometimes though.

[violet-nomad-deactivated2018120]

The fourth one was a completely different person when he drank, though

[give-me-all-your-chocolate]

The fifth one was practically satan 

[perfectview-ofmisery]

sixth one wouldn’t shut the fuck up about his ex

[acutelesbian]

A lot of people ask me what my biggest fear is, or what scares me most. And I know they expect an answer like heights, or closed spaces, or people dressed like animals, but how do I tell them that when I was 17 I took a class called Relationships For Life and I learned that most people fall out of love for the same reasons they fell in it. That their lover’s once endearing stubbornness has now become refusal to compromise and their one track mind is now immaturity and their bad habits that you once adored is now money down the drain. Their spontaneity becomes reckless and irresponsible and their feet up on your dash is no longer sexy, just another distraction in your busy life. Nothing saddens and scares me like the thought that I can become ugly to someone who once thought all the stars were in my eyes.

[fat-thin-skinny]

this fucks me up every single time

[acutelesbian]

I never expected this to be my most popular poem out of the hundreds I’ve written. I was extremely bitter and sad when I wrote this and I left out the most beautiful part of that class.

After my teacher introduced us to this theory, she asked us, “is love a feeling? Or is it a choice?” We were all a bunch of teenagers. Naturally we said it was a feeling. She said that if we clung to that belief, we’d never have a lasting relationship of any sort.

She made us interview a dozen adults who were or had been married and we asked them about their marriages and why it lasted or why it failed. At the end, I asked every single person if love was an emotion or a choice.

Everybody said that it was a choice. It was a conscious commitment. It was something you choose to make work every day with a person who has chosen the same thing. They all said that at one point in their marriage, the “feeling of love” had vanished or faded and they weren’t happy. They said feelings are always changing and you cannot build something that will last on such a shaky foundation.

The married ones said that when things were bad, they chose to open the communication, chose to identify what broke and how to fix it, and chose to recreate something worth falling in love with.

The divorced ones said they chose to walk away.

Ever since that class, since that project, I never looked at relationships the same way. I understood why arranged marriages were successful. I discovered the difference in feelings and commitments. I’ve never gone for the person who makes my heart flutter or my head spin. I’ve chosen the people who were committed to choosing me, dedicated to finding something to adore even on the ugliest days.

I no longer fear the day someone who swore I was their universe can no longer see the stars in my eyes as long as they still choose to look until they find them again.

[conceitedtrash]

This is so fucking important and I think it’s something I needed right now