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CHAZ BADUNK ꜰʀᴇᴅ sᴜɢᴀʀ, 2017

Notes on Róisín Murphy’s song Something More When it first came out, I loved it. Immediately wanted a massively extended version of it. Like, how big disco songs would fill half of an album. After listening to the song in the context of the album I started to realize why. It instantly takes me back to nights out dancing, when I first moved away from home. But not because it’s some big dance song. Because it reminds me of the intimacy of dancing. Especially with one guy in particular. His name is long forgotten but not how it felt. It was like fucking without fucking. We’d both be out with our respective friend groups and at random points throughout the night would find each other on the dance floor. The music was always energetic and begging for “hands in the air” style movements. But we’d just dance close. Felling the tightness of our bodies. Breathing each other in. Caught in our own bubble of young hearts running free, so to speak. A trickle of sweat. A gentle caress of of an arm while guiding the other person closer. A moment of friction when 5 o’clock shadow meets 5 o’clock shadow. Warm breath in your neck as he rests his head on your shoulder. A certain kind of intimacy that typically only comes from a sexual love. Not a lover. Not a one night stand. But sexual LOVE. Just barely tip-toeing across the line of innocence. Leaning in ever closer so we could speak in the throng of people and the blare of the music. Just...enjoying each other for a few songs before drifting back to our friends. We would instinctively find each other every night we were out and our dance would pick right back up, a few times each night. Each time was just as perfect as the last. We never sought out anything more than our moments on the dance floor. The pull of our own intimacy in the crowd of dancing bodies was all we needed. This song takes me right back to those moments. Right back to that feeling. It doesn’t make me miss those moments. It brings me calm, for knowing they happened. Slightly odd, finding contentment in a song about wanting something more. But in the upside down world of 2020, I’ll take it. Best feeling in the world. 🖤

#roisin murphy #something more #Roisin machine #dear diary #personal