@jre420 - Tumblr Blog

ivegotyoukeptin

princess-pizzas

baetology

Describe your perfect date in detail.

sonypraystation

ideal date: it happens

bibliotechno

What is my perfect date? I break into Tiffany’s at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It’s priceless. As I’m taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It’s her father’s business. She’s Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don’t trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he’s the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris, by the Trocadero. She’s been waiting for me all these years; she’s never taken another lover. I don’t care, I don’t show up. I go to Berlin. That’s where I stashed the chandelier.

lameborghini

me, jaywalking and making direct eye contact w the car driver that’s barreling toward me: kill me u coward

whatisthemeaningofthiss-blo-blog

the best rap ever!! love it so much

#lazy scranton #the office

haleighbroucherr

bbus gets away with shitty season after shitty season, but bbcan has their best season yet and is getting put on hiatus

aboutoldfriends

the fact that the other big brothers have had so many low quality, non-eventful seasons and bbcan in contrast has delivered quality every time and it’s the one to be cancelled (/put on hiatus) while the others are allowed to continue oozing shit out of their orifices in prime time no worries…

wokerockstar

BBCAN has had 5 amazing seasons in a row and gets put on hiatus meanwhile BBUS hasn’t been great since 2008 what is his shit

onlyhuman

#the office

physical-fatalities

He was outed tonight on Survivor, and he held his head high throughout the entire time. (he might not have felt that way on the inside, but he did on the outside.) It was inspiring to watch him handle himself with such grace. 🏳️‍🌈