Diddy Kong is trans

titsay
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Claire Keane
DEAR READER
KIROKAZE

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
almost home
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Not today Justin
Misplaced Lens Cap
Keni
$LAYYYTER
One Nice Bug Per Day
Cosimo Galluzzi
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

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will byers stan first human second
dirt enthusiast

@theartofmadeline

Love Begins

seen from Saudi Arabia
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@just-a-chocobo
Diddy Kong is trans
been howling at these for half an hour
exactly
When I was in high school we had a really weird fad that got way out of hand. Some kid had found out how to tie tiny strings to the legs of flies so he could carry it around and keep it as a pet. Teachers couldn’t really do anything about it since it was just a fly, y’know. They aren’t so uncommon in schools. Anyway, he started teaching more kids how to do it and it caught on.
Soon every kid in the school had pet flies tied to strings. They’d even get like multiple flies and carry them around like fly balloons. Even some teachers were getting in on it. Personally, I never got into it but I didn’t have the dexterity needed to do something precise as tying a string around a fly’s leg. No one would help me with it either. I was introvert and weirdo with no friends. I still am.
Things started to fall apart when state testing came around and the sound of constant buzzing became way more aggravating to everyone. There was also the problem of flies dying and the floors being covered in dead fly bodies. Like, despite having them as pets people still didn’t like touching flies with their bare hands. When the flies died they just left them on the floors, seats, and desks or whatever. It wasn’t uncommon to sit in a seat just covered in dead flies. You get used to having fly corpses, and fly juice on your butt after a while.
Even though fly pets were eventually banned (and hefty punishments were thrown out for anyone caught with pet flies), there was still a large amount of flies left in the school. The school had basically become a breeding ground for flies. Lunch was inedible because of all the maggots. They’d even be dripping from the ceilings and stuff. They had to shut down school for at least a month to get the exterminators to purge the place. It wasn’t that effective. There were just so many maggots in every nook and cranny of the school that no amount of exterminators could effectively purge the place without completely knocking down the school.
So, the principal decided to release a modest of amount of spiders into the school to eat all of the flies and maggots. Long story short, it didn’t work. They just managed to create a weird fly-spider based ecosystem in the school. The school had to reopen eventually, and everyone just got used to all of the flies and spiders. The cafeteria had to be moved to a nearby building since the school’s cafeteria had become so infested with spiders and maggots that it had to be locked off.
I moved away at the beginning of my senior year. It was weird adjusting to a school that wasn’t filled with bugs, but I made some cool friends there. My old high school burned down. No one was hurt, but arson wasn’t ruled out. It burned so long and so hard that the land on it had basically become scorched hell. They rebuilt the school elsewhere. They say that if you go to the old school’s location on a dark night, you can see a weird man walking around with tons of ghostly flies tied to his fingers. They say that you can hear them screaming for mercy. That’s probably not true, though.
Posts that you wish were by one-time-i-dreamt
Tumblr University
Optional Uniform
ID
DORMS!!!!!
The Who/Sherlock dorms
Harry Potter/Narnia/LOTR Dorms
Pirates/History dorms
disney/disney princess dorms(you can put more posters,etc)
Directioner dorms(but put more ireland flags and more pics of the boys)
Bye mom
remember when dashcon happened and these kind of posts completely disappeared
why did you bring it BACK
truth turned to legend, legend to myth, and for thousands of years this disaster of a fucking post was gone and yall shitheads brought it back
I want to go and major in fanart minor in discourse and shitposting 😂
I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT THSI GOD FORSAKEN WEBSITE I AM IN SHAMBLES
ANOTHER CLASSIC I LOVE THIS VIDEO
I didn’t know memes could go this far
We have reached the ultimate meme
dumb atla fanfic idea: ozai is thrown back in time—to the time when firelord azulon still sat on the throne. when ursa had not disappeared into the arms of her lover, ikem. when he still had his bending. when the avatar had not reappeared.
when all was right with the world.
ozai’s ready to conquer the world—nine years earlier than planned, nine years before sozin’s comet was set to arrive.
…
what he did not expect was that the one thing standing in his way of success was his eldest son—in the body of a five-year old.
((where ozai and zuko travel back in time and try to thwart each other in every way possible while everyone’s confused by second prince ozai’s great amount of disdain for his only son and said son’s pettiness towards his father))
*in the middle of a war meeting*
Ozai: I suggest we send Prince Zuko with the 37th battalion to fight against the Earth rebels.
War General, very concerned: Prince Zuko is a five-year old.
Ozai, staring at him straight in the eye: I am aware.
Zuko: Listen
Zuko: I have no idea who posted those wanted posters of my father
Zuko: Nor do I have any idea who keeps harassing him with rotten food
Zuko: And who chooped off his goatee
Zuko, making eye-contact with Ozai: It must’ve been the Blue Spirit.
*in the middle of another war meeting which Zuko managed to squeeze himself into*
Zuko, after an hour of low-key arguing with Ozai: I apologize for cutting you off, Father.
Zuko: But can you speak louder?
Zuko: Your ego is deafening.
@aboutiroh this is a beautiful addition. I present this:
Hakoda wasn’t sure what he expected when another Fire Nation ship came into view just seconds after the soldiers stormed down the first one.
“Shit,” he hears Bato mutter behind him.
Hakoda echoed the sentiment albeit silently. Their chances were looking way too grim. He grips his spear tighter. He could only hope Kya, their children, and the rest of tribe could escape safely and make it out alive.
Just as he was about to signal his men to charge, a white flag from the second ship was raised into the air, almost frantically.
Was this the Fire Nation’s new tactic? Hakoda wondered. Lulling their enemies into a false sense of security before ambushing them with greater numbers. He wasn’t going to fall for that. It doesn’t diminish their greater numbers though. The Fire Nation soldiers, loathe he is to admit it, could overpower them at this very moment already, except—
A visible tide of confusion rippled through the first wave of Fire Nation soldiers. They fall back. But not before Hakoda catches whiff of the words, “Dragon of the West”.
Ice washes over Hakoda. It was worse than he thought. He can already see his men hesistating, the younger ones shaking, in his peripheral.
He signals them to wait. Rushing would do them no good. He needed to see the number of men on board before changing strategies.
The hunk of metal docked, creaking grimly before the ramp lowered and hit the ice with a loud thud.
Hakoda blinked.
What came out was a child—likely around Sokka’s age—waving a white flag obviously too big for his body to carry.
The child, seeing that everyone was too stunned to react and attack, gave them a practiced, dimplomatic smile.
“Chief Hakoda,” he greets. “May I steal your children?”
This is the best AU because
- The Gaang is all 10 years younger, except Aang who is still 12.
- Zuko shows up at the SWT and goes “Chief Hakoda I know this sounds confusing but I need your children to stop my douchebag father and end this war”
- He finds Aang in that iceberg to prove his point “See, I even got the Avatar for you, now can I pleeeaaaase go travel the world with Sokka and Katara”
- Aang is very confused too but he just rolls with it
- Azula contemplates whether she should continue to try and impress her dad or go with Zuko. She goes with Zuko.
- Iroh hasn’t started his Siege of Ba Sing Se yet. He’s not post-redemption Iroh, but he’s got it in him somewhere and tiny Zuko awakens it.
- While they’re traveling on Appa, Zuko sees Toph and goes “WAIT we have to abduct that blind baby playing with the badgermoles”
- at this point nobody questions him anymore and they get baby Toph on board. She’s two and somehow still the most badass among all of them.
- Ozai is defeated by a bunch of toddlers and children and is now even more pathetic.
Additionally,
- Rumors of children being randomly abducted spread like wildfire.
- More so after a child from Kiyoshi Island, despite being neutral to the war, was stolen.
- With the knowledge that the Avatar has, in fact, reappeared, people conclude that the Avatar is a kidnapper.
- After kidnapping Toph, Zuko presents her to Aang saying, “This is you earthbending master.”
- Aang is hesistant. But then he sees baby Toph bend metal (“Uh, Zuko, I don’t think you should buy metal baby toys” “Trust me, Aang. I know what I’m doing”<<He does this because adult!Toph once said that plastic and wooden baby toys were for the weak) and he’s immediately sold.
- Nobody outside the gaang is sure whether or not Aang’s serious about calling a two-year old sifu. Said two year old cackles everytime she’s addressed that way.
- Sokka develops a childhood crush on Suki and bullies her in response. He stops when Suki beats his ass and gives him a stern talk.
- Sokka begins following Suki like a lost puppy.
- Katara first learns waterbending from the swampbenders when Zuko took them on a detour.
- Zuko sends Azula and Ursa letters every now and then, updating them about important stuff. (Dear mother, I am now travelling with a two-year old. Best wishes, Zuko)
- Ursa travels away from the Fire Nation in search of Zuko after Azula ran over to her and began bawling about Zuzu replacing her as his sister.
- Cue mother-daughter bonding as they travel around the Earth Kingdom in disguises in search of Zuko and his gaggle of toddlers. (Azula basks in the attention from her mother that she’s always yearned for.)
- Ursa bumps into Kya and Hakoda and team up. They exchange stories and they all agree that there needs to be a change in Firelord.
- Kya gives Azula candy, Hakoda teaches Azula how to defend herself with a knife, Ursa guides her through firebending katas. Needless to say, Azula is showered in actual love and is happy.
- Team Actually-Trying-To-Be-Good-Parents reunites with the gaang and after a bit of scolding and a fair share of fretting have dinner like one big family.
- To Sokka’s horror, Azula gets along very well with Momo. Azula also proceeds to teach Katara how to fight with a knife.
- Meanwhile, Iroh is travelling the world with Lu Ten after Ozai’s obvious assasination of the late Firelord Azulon. Together, they go through multiple spiritual hijinks, uncover lost civilizations, find themselves embroiled in conspiracies about cabbages, and discover the order of the white lotus.
- Zuko and Iroh’s letter exchanges are wild.
- Ozai ascends to the throne with an empty palace, heirs somewhere around the world, a half-cut goatee (courtesy of the Blue Spirit), and an avatar under the guidance of his son, gearing to end his reign once more. He briefly wonders if he should’ve chased after his son instead of assasinating his father.
Every single time. This post, I swear. It keeps getting better.
Okay but does Lu Ten end up as Firelord or do they just plop literal gremlin child Zuko on the throne and give him baby Firelord robes
Because, if it’s the latter, that’s adorable but hoo boy the royal tailors are going to hate puberty.
*after defeating Ozai*
Zuko, a 7-year old: I will ascend the throne.
Everyone: CHILD NO.
Zuko: I will ascend.
The Ozai loyalists at court are prepared for the greatest shitshow on earth once a literal 7-year old becomes Firelord and gleefully bid their time until his undoubtedly imminent failure, but the little demon is actually doing… well?
The tiny monster’s feet aren’t even touching the ground from where he sits on the throne, but he is nonetheless happily debunking the merits of class-specific household registration and demanding cuts be made to the military budget and when did he even learn those words?!
Lu Ten, of course, is delighted to be his little cousin’s advisor, because from up here he gets to see all the fantastic faces that the royal councillors make when their tiny Firelord talks about things like “our public schooling system is frankly atrocious, Minister Seng, and I will no longer stand idly by while our youth is fed propaganda; here, I’ve put together an overview of the new curriculum, you and the Cabinet of Education are to refine and implement this, effective immediately.”
Things get even better when, not 5 minutes later, the little Firelord proceeds to call the Minister of Education a “big dumdum”.
I’m sorry but I misread a single sentence and joined the momo is terrifying train unquestionably. I misread Azula teaches Katara how to fight with a knife as Azula teaches Momo how to fight with a knife. I don’t know why this is the concept that seems terrifying to me when I literally wrote a fic where he had a gun.
Aang and Zuko (as the mentally oldest of the group) have to parent all of these tiny children, and as he’s the only one not in the body of a toddler, Aang is forced to do all of the heavy lifting
Even though there’s no need to go to Wan Shi Tong’s library in this timeline, they take a field trip anyway. The knowledge they donate to get in consists of Aang and Zuko’s wanted posters, Suki’s drawing of Kyoshi, Sokka’s drawing of Suki, Katara’s waterbending scroll (which she STILL somehow stole from the pirates) and Toph’s shockingly accurate metal statue of Wan Shi Tong himself. The statue and the scroll are the only things that actually get them in. They get shooed out after Sokka suddenly gets homesick and ends up making the rest of the Gaang cry, too. Instead of having to search for Appa, they must go on a side quest to find everyone’s parents after this
The Great Divide episode doesn’t happen. The two tribes happen upon an exhausted twelve year-old, a six year-old giving orders like adult royalty, a five year-old with a boomerang, and a four year-old who is attempting the water whip. They decide that maybe their problems aren’t so bad after all
Aang still derails things to ride as many animals as he can, but this time teaches everyone else (much to Zuko’s dismay and frustration)
Aang: I’m gonna ride the Usagi
Zuko: Aang no
Baby Gaang: We wanna ride too!!
Zuko: OHMYGOD NO
This is the greatest thing I’ve ever read and this is canon to me now sorry not sorry
Ursa: “Azula, what are you doing with a knife? Who gave you a knife?
legitimately one of the funniest videos in earth
Is he okay?
seems like it
What is the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire
*RARE* John Denver & Johnny Cash - Take Me Home Country Roads
Found this while going through my granddad’s VHS tapes and couldn’t find it anywhere online, so here it is.
Every time I’m lucky enough to have this hit my dash I listen to it, and every time I get chills all the way through.
I’m so at peace rn
@nuka-nuke
imagine harmonising with johnny cash on your own song, i’d die on the spot this is beautiful
That was John Denver’s gift though. He was an amazing song writer, but the man could harmonize with just about anyone.
@tyrantisterror
Love the puns from Pun Hub