We wont be sad, we'll just be angry until we die. @just-tolly - Tumblr Blog

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i have grown and struggled and learned, i worked so hard. i cut out everything that held me back, i fight my impulses and feel bitterly disappointed when i slip. the slips are fewer and farther between and i know that how i feel is a sign that im doing the right thing. the funny part was that i got all the signs that i thought i wanted, but when i got them i ignored them. i guess im closer to blind than lost and that shit really fucking excites me

I am doing my best to be kind to myself. I’ve dug myself out of the grave that my life had become, but now I am confused. I’ve had this situation before. I should have left her in the park and not wasted my time. So i want to do that for real this time but I know that it would be an overreaction. I think the difference should be my mentality about the situation, and not becoming lifeless disillusioned and uncaring again. Am I even capable of moving past this? Yes. It’s just that a large part of the new me is also suggesting very loudly to do what I never had the balls to do last time. tbh I think either way it doesn’t matter. My life doesn’t revolve around being with somebody to make me feel like I matter anymore. But I would really like a sign for what to do next.

Universe, give me a sign.