chopper - deckerstar - @taylorswiftmicrofic - word count: 532
Lucifer and Chloe are sitting on the floor of their apartment, surrounded by gifts. The living room is a mess of wrapping paper, gift boxes, and gift bags that’ll probably never be used again.
“Another candle,” Chloe says.
“We’ll put that in the maybe pile.” Lucifer grins, taking it from her and putting it in their designated box.
“Ew,” she says. “A stand mixer.”
“Maybe. Coffee maker?”
“No.”
Lucifer tosses it in the no bin.
“An electric chopper. Was that on the registry?” Chloe asks.
“Definitely not. Maze might like it for torture, though,” Lucifer comments.
Maze and Eve, while leaving for their honeymoon, had tasked Chloe and Lucifer with sorting their wedding gifts by how likely they were to use it. Maze told them to toss the ones they wouldn’t want, but Eve agreed with Chloe on sorting the no’s too.
“Oh, and this knife set. It’s quite exquisite,” Lucifer continues.
“I hope you mean for cooking.” Chloe raises an eyebrow at him.
“Right.”
“Lots of wine. Oh, and a bottle opener. Aw, it’s engraved. I’m putting this in yes.”
“Photo album, ugh.”
Lucifer tosses it into the no bucket. Chloe takes it out and puts it in the maybe.
“Eve might want it,” she explains.
“Ah, a couples’ massage coupon. I’m sure they’ll love that,” Lucifer says, putting it in the yes bucket.
Chloe’s alarm sounds.
“Crap, I gotta pick up Trixie from school soon, and we haven’t even sorted through half the pile yet,” she curses.
“I’ll take care of it,” Lucifer says.
“Are you sure?” Chloe asks.
“Yes. I’ll clean up while you pick up the urchin. And take this.” He hands her a crisp hundred dollar bill. “For her after school snack.”
Chloe gives him a look, but knows him well enough not to argue. She’ll probably get something reasonably priced and stick the change in Lucifer’s wallet later when he’s not looking.
He knows her well enough not to try and sneak it back into her purse.
She kisses him goodbye as she leaves. Lucifer locks the door behind her and gets to work.
Trash first, probably, right? He splits up the wrapping paper and tissue paper into two piles. The Det— Chloe likes keeping the tissue paper to reuse or repurpose into crafts, so he puts that in her designated drawer. Then he piles up the gift bags, smallest into largest, and tosses the pile of ripped up gift wrap.
Now, what to do with the gifts and buckets? He could probably sort through quite a few before the Detective gets back.
He picks out twenty to sort through and sets the rest into Maze’s old room. It wasn’t quite big enough for them to sort through the gifts in, but it’ll do nicely as a storage room for now.
He stops to admire his handiwork in the living room. It’s almost spotless, save for the small pile of gifts and 3 large buckets. His eyes wander to the urchin’s wall of drawings. It’s even more full now, many of them of their family— Chloe, Trixie, and him. The two of them have always been his home, and he’s glad to know they are hers.
