Whatever pops, it's written

[kikyersya]

Hey Mr. King

Happy Hippy Birthday!

Today you are 31 years old, 31 years of living on this beautiful planet. 31 years of experiencing joy, happiness, love, anger, hatred, regret, sadness, failures, success, envy, suffering. 31 years of experiencing of life. May all the good things, and happiness come toward to your life. I wish all the good luck in world for anything exciting await you. May all your dream come true. For when they'd do, I'd be with you.

I can’t wait for another journey with you. I can’t believe that we already made it.

I’m excited and also I’m grateful it was you. I know sometimes love story sound cheesy, But let me tell you something. maybe I am not a perfect one, but I’m the one who you can count in. I think we made a good partner so far.(Hope so).

I wish I could stop the time, so I can stay in yours whenever I want.

I wish we could live our life together, I really.

Because being with you was all about happiness and turned all the bad things into a good one.

PS : here is a song for your companion. A song that reminds me of you

Love you✨

[kikyersya]

Jakarta, 20 Jun 2022

Look at the sky

The weather is really nice

It’s warm my heart

I don’t know is it the weather or is it you

You came into my life

And i don’t know why

You fill this emptiness

With all of your story

Each and every day

I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you

I know it will be hard

But with you by my side

I couldn’t ask for more

[kikyersya]

Jakarta, 11 Apr 2022

Hey, I want to say that I am grateful that I met you, I like being around you. It seems I can talk to you for all day, or perhaps we could listen to music and hold each other hands.

I don’t know what the first thing that made me in love with you. I even never have a plan to being with you, having relationship. Kind of funny I guess.

But one things that I want to do right now is to grow old with you like some old cheesy love song. But i really want to do that with you. I’m not scared if you’re by my side.Perhaps we could have amazing journey.

I don’t know what kind of feeling it is, but you kinda warm my heart in your own way.

Love you, Mr. King 🧡

[kikyersya]

Jakarta, 4 Apr 2022

From this to this 🥰

[kikyersya]

Jakarta, Mar 1st 2022.

If I could choose 1 song to be our song, perhaps I choose this one.

I remember we strolled around the city, and hold each other’s hand. It’s warm my heart in that way.

I like being around you, I found myself smiling when I remember that night.

We talked about each other insecurity, I know that sometimes we feels vulnerable, and it’s really okay. That’s because you have a genuine feeling, and I’m glad that I met you and you’ve been here, beside me. I really can talk anything to you since I found it’s hard for me to open up to someone, you are a stranger that came to my life, I don’t expect anything but now all I want to do is you to stay a little bit longer than before.

https://open.spotify.com/track/1bfTXGpAL4638bmw5Krpb3?si=DkaE1w64TqmX0gQi718TIg

[kikyersya]

Jakarta, Feb 2nd 22

Have you ever feel lonely?

Going through this fucking world just by yourself?

I just need a good companion, so we can strolling around the city while listen to good music.

I don’t know, recently i just want to be real, to be true to myself.

I can do all my stuff, but it’s better if we can share those things together, right?

Sometimes I got too excited and want to share that energy to someone, and sometime I feel grey out of nowhere just because I have a rough day. And I realize I don’t have anybody to tell.

I know I’ve been selfish if it’s all about me, but actually, no. I’m not. I want to hear your story, I want to be there if you don’t have anybody when you got something in your mind tho.

Is it too much to ask?

Ps : I don’t know why I wrote this thing, it’s just came up while I listen to I’ll Be back by Ripple & Murmur

[kikyersya]

Jakarta, 25 Jan 2022

I don’t know what kind of feeling it is. I can’t stop thinking about you, our possibilities. I know i’ve been silly. But really, it’s hard for me to open up my heart, and with you, everything seems normal, and I enjoy the time that we’ve been through.

Yes I know, it’s just some random talk, maybe it’s just a coincidence. I don’t want to expect anything, but I really like talk to you.

No matter where it is goes, I’m happy that I met you, I better keep it to myself. I don’t want to lose someone that so nice just because I’m a fool.

[kikyersya]

Jakarta, 21 Jan 22

berbagilah sebuah cerita kepadaku

ceritakan aku tentang langit

tentang sekumpulan awan yang menari di atas sana

tentang teduh yang kau berikan ketika terik matahari sedang panas-panasnya

tentang kesedihan yang kau hadirkan bersama hujan

tentang hangatnya rona senja.

tentang hakikat cinta yang tidak merusak, hakikat cinta yang selalu menerima

seperti langit yang selalu menerima senja.

[kikyersya]

Drowning

Music has the power to revive memories, sometimes so intensely that they hurt.

I don’t know what kind of feeling it is, I feel so lonely, but also I need someone to accompany me, I miss someone that never exist.

Here’s the song I listen while fight those battle

1. Don’t worry for being alone - The Milo

“ Lights guide you through the emptiness, There’s something you could found in the dark”

There will be a light, there will be a way. No matter what happens, there will always a hope.

2. Weather - Novo Amor

“Those wishes were never for granted”

I don’t know why, but this song warm my heart in that way, but also hurt in the same way.

3. Blindsided - Bon Iver

“Would you really rush out for me now”

A song that made me adore Justin Vernon, Bon Iver. But would be someone that really to rush me out?

4. Sadness don’t own me - The Staves

“Man am I terrified”

5. Still - Daughter

“Darkness falling, leaves nowhere to go”

6. We Only Attack Ourselves - Funeral Suits

“How come the sun don’t shine on me anymore”

The only things that we fight is on our mind

7. Gamble - Lucy Rose

“Can’t we work it out?

Won’t you talk to me?

What’s this all about?”

I don’t know why, but every time I listen to this song, I just want to cry out loud.

8. I Always Wanna Die (Sometimes) - The 1975

“Your memories are sceneries for thing you said but never really meant”

Sometimes.

9. Black Flies - Ben Howard

“Or maybe you were the ocean, when I was just a stone”

I’m only a fool, thinking that I have a part in your heart.

10. Don’t Know Why - Ghostly Kisses

“Cause deep inside, there’s nothing hurt where love has died”

The song that you gave to me, should I let you go?

11. Immune - Jensen Mcrae

“What will we say to each other

When the needle goes in?

What will we be to each other

If the world doesn't end?”

You can’t make someone love you, love happens just in that way, and you just warm my heart in your own way. But I know I’m a fool.

12. Pathetic Waltz - Pure Saturday

“How we spent the time for more, I can’t go”

I just want to stop the time whenever I’m with you

Ps : The link below.

[kikyersya]

Jakarta, 30 August 2021

I got trouble on my mind

It’s fine

My mind take me to the places that i don’t know

I fucked up

[kikyersya]

Nobody said that letting go was easy, not even a sweet ending. Parting is always hurts. No matter how neat it wrapped, waving hands is the hardest.

People have their own way saying goodbye, it might be cruel or it might be so tender that you didn’t notice it was a farewell.

[kikyersya]

Jakarta, 1 August 2021

What would I be without you?

Let me be me, and I let you be you

We never know how long’s road this is

Until the day that we don’t have any choices

We never be together

We pretend to be blind

We know we can’t

We forgot who we are

I can’t imagined how’s life when you are not around

I love you but i should let go of you

We never know the love until it’s gone

kinda tired of being okay with things I'm not okay with

[kikyersya]

March 27, 2021

What is the ideas of being forever?

I thought we could be forever

I thought we could run through this fucking world together, I never imagined how’s life without you.

I want to see you forever and ever

I want to see you forever

Now i’m searching for a reason to believe that I’m something

Cause I get lonely when it’s out and I miss you right about now

But Maybe

Is this the end?

Maybe you waited for me maybe you’re gone

No mater how slowly I walk, you’ll never even think about running after me.

I can sense the distance it’s creates.

[kikyersya]

Red flags.

Last night I cried while looking at the stars, they remind me of your eyes.

I surrender to the sound of my own apologizing, for things I never did, For things I’d never do to you.

But still I stay with you, cause I can’t bear to hurt you like you do.

Under pressure I can’t speak when your words are cutting through me.

[kikyersya]

Here But Not Here.

He was beside me, but why did I feel so lonely? I could smell his sandalwood scent, I could feel his rough skin touching mine, but why did I feel like he was so far away that I misses him?

I looked at his eyes but I saw nothing. His flesh was here but his mind was nowhere to been seen. He was no more than a vacant house.

I could feel his feeling for me fade away as I could feel his smile for me was not as gentle as it used to be. He smile because he had to, not because he wanted to.

I could sense him silently walking away from me. His body was still with me but his heart had been away for so long that I didn’t notice when was the last time I had it in mine.

[kikyersya]

Padang, June 9 2019

I just can’t get out of my bed, i just can’t accept that my sun no longer shine, that my day no longer bright as the old days. I think he’s the one, the one who can save me. But he just cut me off from his world. He just let me down. , Love always brought me down.

[kikyersya]

My blood

My hand

My soul

I've thrown them onto you without control

The things I freely give

You stole

And now I'm left in pieces

- Ode To... (Rachael Yamagata)