do you think she was having intrusive thoughts about dealing with rose like she dealt with eridan.
do you think raising her actual active weapon of war to her lips, smearing the color of what would have been rose's blood if she was a troll, in the exact way she did after she executed the last person to gaslight her into accepting a shitty situation over and over and over again
(it makes the callback to this conversation really fucking funny because
(that source was rose. rose's influence stretches even that far back. her eridan trauma mingling with how rose is behaving was fucking. Inevitable. frankly.)
also people are saying "didnt kanaya already deal with and come to terms with it earlier." no
in homestuck that phrase is code for "i have UNRESOLVED STRONG FEELINGS ON THIS ISSUE."
and even then she goes out of her way to say shes not angry at jade but she IS ANGRY AT ROSE. she is upset at being lied to but she didnt think there was anything to say about it in a public venue
so this is a private one!
she got pissed at jade for openly admitting to trying to manipulate her/trying to solve her like a puzzle/bury her in therapyspeak.
you guys notice how this \/ describes the rosemary status quo.
how kanaya, for the first time, heard this ^
and saw herself. and realized just how fucking bad its gotten
kanaya is so fucking sick. of being told that her fate is to stand by and have blood on her hands for the decisions of the awful people around her
and rose's response, her genuinely haunting reply to all of this
that's *fear* in kanaya's reply.
*when* did you stop trying.
how long have i been with this... person, who just. thinks she's utterly above it all. who is tormented with visions of the future so completely that the present has ceased to matter
is rose even still in there?
or is it just the bored goddess, who destroyed *herself* as a first result to get more knowledge, who i raised a kid with
another off-brand doppelganger
god. this update saved my life. this update watered my crops. this update fed me for weeks. i am so fucking happy everyone is finally seeing the raw power that is knowing the toxic rosemary yuri was already here
