.・゜゜・

kalayah ❛kj ❜ jacksel. silver. shadow. xxxv. unemployed. it is the sweet taste of life i have lost, i who have tasted the sweetest moments life can offer, so sweet i knew they could not last. sweetness is brief, bitterness is long.

[khcollection-blog]

SEND IN YOUR CONFESSIONS!

@kjacksel

[khcollection-blog]

SEND IN YOUR CONFESSIONS!

@jade-deveraux & @kjacksel

[shrewdshrew]

You lick your lips, you taste like years of being alone.

Warsan Shire 

[kjacksel-blog]

MICHAEL KREST.

As much as Michael enjoys living in Norway, he doubts he’ll ever grow accustomed to the cold. Even Emily is less energetic in such weather and tends to cry or throw a fit when she’s too cold. These days, they tend to stay in the forever warm and cozy bookstore that he owns. Michael organizing shelves and whatnot while Emily kept herself busy with coloring books or flipping through colorful magazines. Since the days are slow, he normally ends up sitting at the desk with his little girl in his lap while she does her ‘job’ of littering the desk with crude, yet cute, drawings of poorly proportioned stick animals of unnatural colors.

When the bell to the door of the shop rings, Michael looks up from the green drawing of what could be a giraffe or a horse, looking over at the newcomer. “Good evening. If you need some assistance, I’ll be with you shortly.”

It's one of those days when normal clothes aren't enough, when they feel thinner than they are. Breaths rise in puffs, arms hug her body tightly and there is a briskness to movements that will melt with the snow. Or, maybe normal clothes will never be neough in Norway, KJ couldn't be too sure and she didn't want to find out. Thus, she put on as many layers as she possibly could before leaving her apartment. A tank top, a long-sleeved with a short-sleeve over top, a thin cardigan and a sweater coat. She was also wearing long johns under her jeans. KJ did not come to play with the cold today. It's also why she went running across the street from the cafe to the small bookstore.

Her move from left to right even though she's heard the voice first. A habit she's developed over the years, watching to see if she's been flanked. Then, once deemed safe, green eyes fall upon a man and a child. She rolls her shoulders, relaxing a bit. “Oh, no. That’s okay,” KJ refuses kindly with a small smile on her lips. “I don’t want to interrupt the artistic creativity going on over there.” She makes circular hand motions towards Michael and the child that has her attention on her drawing as she sits comfortably on his lap. KJ chuckles gently, "Pretty drawing there, little lady. The orange goes really well with the pink."

[kjacksel-blog]

NOAH KÖHLER.

“Dammit,” Noah hissed, shaking his head and straightened up after the failed attempt at pocketing the ball. “You know what I hate about this game?” He asked rhetorically, walking a few steps as he spoke to the person on the other side of the Pool table.·“Nothing. It requires steady precision, an eye for detail and flawless strategy. Which is why I’m pissed as hell because Im quite obviously off.” He sighed.·“So, then tell me. Do you also like to wallow in your troubles with a loud club and a good drink? Or are you one of the lucky ones just here for fun?” He smiled at them.

His words melted together. KJ had to furrow her brows and squint her eyes in order to focus on Noah’s words. It’s been a long time since she’s had as much alcohol as she’s had. Which, was not a lot. KJ was facing the bar, but hearing the questions, she turns around in her stool to politely look at Noah. “Umm...” She closes her eyes for a moment, collecting her fuzzy thoughts. “I...” Was this a trick question? What was the right answer? Obviously, KJ hasn't been in school for a long time, but she suddenly remembers when she was in elementary school and not enjoying having to answer a question when she didn't have the correct answer on point. Wow, what an incommodious fact to think about right now. KJ didn’t like clubs. They were too loud. She got headaches easily. This was nice, though. This place was cozy. Maybe that’s how she became a bit too tipsy for the first time in a very long time. Which was she was absolutely not planning. “... Am one of the lucky ones... With a good drink.” Did she answer that correctly? KJ couldn't even remember what the question was.

[antigonick]

Brittle, not from solitude but from mistrust, the aftermath of violence.

Louise Glück, excerpt of “The Garment”, in Vita Nova

[smollmikey]

Protective sentence starters??

because visualizing muses in these situations generally equates to puppies guarding each other and its wonderful

“No, don’t do that it’s not safe.”

“You’re scared of that, aren’t you?”

“Don’t touch her/him!”

“It’s cute that you tried to protect me and all, but you’re like a foot shorter than me, you know?”

“I will always step in between you and something like that.”

“Why? Because I don’t want you to get hurt, that’s why!”

“Do you think just because my feet don’t touch the bottom of the pool that I need a floatie?”

“The stepping stool is unecessary.”

“I’m not apologizing for what I said to that asshole/jerk… He/she was saying terrible things about you.”

“If you say another word about her/him, you’ll regret it.” 

“I don’t want to put you in that type of environment.”

“Make sure to tell me if you get worried, or nervous, or claustrophobic, or-”

“You could have been hurt.”

“I indirected him/her on Twitter for your honor.”

“I think you should leave this type of thing to me.”

“I’m gonna protect you.”

“You can hold onto me if you’re scared, you know?”

“I’m not leaving you alone.  Not now, not ever.”

“Let’s all watch a different movie.  This one freaks her/him out.”

“I get where you’re coming from dude, but honestly shut the hell up and don’t talk about her/him that way.”

“She/He isn’t an object.”

“She/he told me what you did, and all I’m gonna do is tell you to stay away.”

“You don’t know anything about her/him!”

“What?  You think that was funny?  You just insulter her/him, and expect me to laugh?”

“I’m not gonna let you put up with that.”

“Really, if you told me to I’d go punch them for you.”

“Wait, let me walk you home.”

“I’ll drive you, please– please don’t go like this.”

“It’s dangerous.”

“I’m worried about you.”

“I meant it when I said I would protect you.”

“I’m not stepping aside until you back up.”

“It’s too cold for you to come out here without a jacket on.”

“I’ll go see what the noise was.”

“Stay on the phone with me.”

“Promise me you’ll be safe.”

“I don’t feel comfortable with you going there on your own.”

“He/She did what to you?”

“I won’t let you go through something like that again.”

“I’m not perfect, but I’m trying my hardest to do everything to keep you safe.”

“Stay behind me.”

“I promised your mom to make sure you didn’t do anything stupid tonight.”

“I love you.  Of course I’m gonna defend you like that.”

“No, he/she isn’t good enough to take you out.  Trust me, I know.” 

“Are you planning to stay glued to my side this whole evening?”

“I’ll be okay, because I know you’re back here ready to step in if I need you.”

“Thank you for always sticking with me.”

“I’m really worried about her/him, but I don’t think he/she wants me to call.”

“I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you.”

“Like, I don’t expect to ever have to take a bullet for you, but I would.”

send a name and a sentence xx

[fromanotherroom]

Visit Original Link

[kjacksel-blog]

❛ she bruises, coughs. she splutters pistol shots, but hold her down with soggy clothes and breezeblocks. ❜

[kjacksel-blog]

& JADE DEVERAUX.

Jade smiled at the pleasant surprise of seeing KJ at the event. She hadn’t expected her to show up and quite frankly, KJ didn’t seem like the type to be at these kinds of events. She had the kind of vibe where she’d rather be inside watching a movie rather than being out with a large group of people all crowding together to watch movies. “Hi,” Jade said. “It’s nice to see you here.” She took her hands out of her jacket pockets and laughed lightly. “Actually, since you mention it, yes. I checked the nearby salon and one of those beauty stores and they said that they remembered some people buying bleach for their hair. I just checked that list, which wasn’t very long, and voila, found them.”

KJ hasn't heard that sentiment in a long time. It's nice to see you. Such a simple... Opinion. She tried not to let it matter too much, but it was nice to hear. Despite, the quick, odd look of furrowed brows and a thin, awkward smile KJ gives Jade. "Thanks... Yeah. It's nice seeing you here, too. Someone I know. --" Then, she corrects herself right away, "Recognize, at least." KJ tilts her head to one side, looking at the Detective, and then looks away quickly somewhere else. Other faces. The possible exits. Masks, costumes. The sharpness of laughter from a girl on a date. The excitment of the people around her rang loudly in her ears. “Good, that’s great!” KJ responds, quickly redirecting her attention back to Jade. “Will I, uh, get my credit in the newspapers?” She jokes, "Local Newbie Helps Detective Solve Scandalous String of Car Thievery - Or, is that too long of a headline?"

[minyoongi-ah]

Juliana Harkavy by Farrah Aviva [x] [x]

[kjacksel-blog]

& SOFIA VASQUEZ.

"Good to know I’m not the only one who doesn’t know the way,” Sofia jokes. In all honesty, it is somewhat of a relief. At least she’s not the only one still trying to find her way around the place. And, of course, it means there aren’t just locals living in the area. Given her lack of Norwegian language skills, that’s good news. "Likewise, KJ,” she smiles in response. “Oh, of course not,” she laughs at the woman’s question. “You’re right, I did just move here. Kind of the very reason I’m so lost,” she adds, amused. “How long have you been here?” 

"And probably won't know for awhile. For me personally, at least. These street names are insane." She says with a bit of a laugh. In actuality, it didn't take long for KJ to understand her surroundings as a result of her paranoia. Understand where you are, and you'll understand how to get out the most quick and efficient way. It was these damn street names she couldn't get the hang of. Looks like she'll be learning Norwegian in her spare time. Which, she had a lot of. "Welcome to Kingsholm," She says to the other woman with a smile. “Barely a week. Still unpacking, in fact.” A lie she didn't need to tell, but somehow thought it was necessary. People who moved into a new house normally spent weeks unpacking. It took KJ two days. "Take a right, here." She says, instructing where to go next. "This cafe right here," KJ points to a small, hole-in-the-wall shop, "Fantastic hot chocolate."

[kjacksel-blog]

& JADE DEVERAUX.

Jade tilted her head to the side as she watched KJ’s facial expressions. She seemed to have a personal connection to kidnapping. Maybe she had a friend or relative who was kidnapped. Or maybe she was kidnapped at some point, she thought. “Well, one of the reasons I became a detective is because I like mysteries and puzzles.” Jade shrugged her shoulders and gave her a smile as the conversation shifted. 

“Fair enough,” she said with a laugh. “Boston?” She raised her eyebrows. “Were you born and raised there?” she asked. She hadn’t detected much of an accent from the woman, which made her even more intriguing. Jade worked hard at perfecting her accents and the one she was currently using was not her real one. Luckily, Katya’s accent was so strange and unique, it was often not heard by anyone and people couldn’t argue with her accent being incorrect. “I’ll say what I want about them. They know it’s true, so if they don’t want people talking shit, then they better shape up and do their jobs.” She put her hands on her hips as she went into the blurb about where she was from. “London. Born there. I moved around and stayed in a lot of different places and went to boarding school, so my accent is all over the place.”

The woman arches a brow. “Do you find your fill here? Of mysteries and puzzles?” So far, there was nothing about Kingsholm that gave off that it was festering with crimes. The car break-ins weren’t that big of a deal. More of a nuisance than anything, it sounded like. 

Were you born and raised there? The question left her stumped for a moment. She blinks in surprise. Yes ... and no, she wants to answer. It’s complicated. But, that would raise too many questions that KJ didn’t want to answer if Detective Kaminiski was feeling curious enough. Boston was where she’s been the last ten years, but it never felt like home. Hungary was a different lifetime ago. Hardly rememberable, but there were little things that filled her with a nolgastic warmth. That was supposed to be home, right? “Settled there in my mid-twenties. Before that, I moved around a bit.” Is her answer. She doesn’t know if she sounds believable. To a detective, KJ could only assume that she was hardly able to pull the wool over Kaminiski’s eyes.

The brute honesty allowed a bubble of laughter erupts past KJ’s lips. “From all of the doughnuts their eating it doesn’t sound like they’re ready to shape up anytime soon.” KJ gives a small chuckle at her own lame joke. Either the Detective was lying like herself when she said she moved around a lot or she was telling the truth. Whichever outcome, it put a smile on KJ’s face because of the similiarities in what they were telling each other. "All over the place, yes. Unique sounding, though." 

[kjacksel-blog]

& JADE DEVERAUX.

“I didn’t think that Norway was really into Halloween,” Jade said, mostly to herself. She found herself splitting time between two worlds: the Sigunn Centre’s gala for Silvers and the movie marathon. Jade disliked movies, finding them long and difficult to hold her attention, but Katya loved movies. She figured it’d be strange for those who knew her to know she skipped a movie marathon put on by the town. She turned around when someone tapped her on the shoulder. “Yes? Can I help you?”

Having knowing nothing about the amount of Silvers who truly resided in Kingsholm, KJ was not about to make herself a target. Maybe she was being paranoid, but it felt like a trap. KJ also wasn't sure if she should be coming out tonight at all. She wasn't the superstitious type... but there was a part of her that kept saying: It's halloween. something it bound to happen. But she was also fighting herself for not wanting the same exact life as she did back in Boston. A complete recluse. In the end, KJ forced herself out of her apartment and goes to the most normal event, wich was the movie marathon. At first, she didn't know what to do with herself but just look around. She stood there, clearly uncomfortable. And then before KJ could stop herself, she gravitated towards a familiar stature. "Just me." She says, putting her hands up, palms facing out in a gentle surrender. "Just, uh... Wanted to say hi?" Her hands move into her back pockets. "Make any headway on those car break-ins?" KJ asks lamely, and scrunches her nose.

[madgirlf]

all my grief says the same thing: this isn’t how it’s supposed to be. this isn’t how it’s supposed to be. and the world laughs. holds my hope by the throat. says: but this is how it is

Fortesa Latifi

[kjacksel-blog]

& MARIT MYHRE.

The one perk about being so crippling awkward herself was that no one else’s awkwardness ever bothered her. The woman’s words were met with a gentle half smile. “Me either. This is my gallery. I did okay with painting, learned about color and technique but everything I tried to paint fell flat, didn’t have any life to it. I’ve come to prefer showcasing people with real gifts to evoke feeling in their artwork.” Slender fingers point to the display, a motherly sort of pride in her voice. “The display is for a new artist, out of town. They’re feeling super shy about trying to reach a wider audience.”

Dark brows raise in surprise. KJ would have thought in order to be an art director, or whatever this woman's title was, you would have to at least have a bit of artistic skill. Maybe, this thinking just showed how out-of-touch KJ still was. "You definitly have an eye." She says, repeating what Marit had told KJ earlier. "At least, I think so. I haven't, ah, been around art a whole lot in my lifetime." She remembers her father had a number of pieces around the house. She never paid any attention to them back then. "But this - what you have is nice." KJ watches the woman as she becomes immersed into a painting; wondering what it was like to connect with something on such a personal level. "Is that how you decide which pieces of artwork to bring into your store? You like finding new artists?" She asks, eyes shifting around the space. “Are you going to find that much of a wider audience of art culture here? In Kingsholm?” Her question is genuine. She really had no idea.

[kjacksel-blog]

& JADE DEVERAUX.

"Detectives like to have a challenge when it comes to a murder or a kidnapping,” Jade said, “not petty theft.” She raised her eyebrows and gave KJ a small smile. As she continued working with the police, getting herself deeper and deeper into the world of humans and Silvers, she was becoming more and more aware of who she was talking to. Before this time, she was only concerned with herself and getting the job done. Now, she had to be one the lookout for people coming after her as Jade or her as Katya. She at the same time had nothing to lose and everything to lose now. She wondered if the woman in front of her was a Silver. Katya would never know as her negation abilities automatically silencing any Silver’s powers. 

Jade shrugged her shoulders at KJ’s suggestion. “Perhaps,” she said, her smile fading away. The comment reminded her of when she was a kid. Young, bored, boundless energy. She took to learning to steal and pick pockets and eventually got into manipulating others and running cons. Of course, she was silent and never so sloppy to break in somewhere in broad day light. “It’s a good theory. Have you thought of being a police officer?” she asked with a light laugh. “The police force could use someone smart for once. I think the whole nothing to do rots their brains as they play solitaire on the computer.” Jade glanced at KJ before looking around at all the people passing by. “Where did you move from? Curious to know. There’s a surprising number of people who aren’t from around here. Me included.” 

KJ gives a chuckle to cover up her wince at kidnapping, - she feels hands grab her upper arm so tightly that she can figure bruises are already forming. She remembers the feeling of her feet dragging against the hardwood floors, becoming deadweight, not trying to go anywhere. It wasn’t any use. She still fought, though. – KJ nods slowly. “Fair enough. A little dark, but fair enough.” She sucks in a sharp breath, her hands are placed into the pockets of her jeans so they wouldn’t ball into anxiety-filled fists.

This time, KJ lets out a true bark of laughter, then scrunches her brows. She tried to recall when she thought about being anything. And then she begins to figure out if Detective Kaminski is joking or not. “No. I’ve just – seen stuff, you know?” KJ shrugs, looking away to the ground. “You see a lot of that in Boston. I hardly think that makes me even a decent candidate for police work. Thank you for the compliment, though.” KJ quirks her head to the side, feeling a bit awkward with not knowing what else to say. “You may not want to admit that out loud…” She laughs again, but there’s still a bit of unease to her voice. “People might not like that their police department isn’t exactly up to par. Except for you, of course. Since you aren’t playing solitaire.”  KJ brings a hand out to make a gesture to – nothing at all, really, “Boston.” She repeats quickly. Funny, how even after all these years she wants to say Hungary. “Oh? – Where are you, ah – where are you from?” Despite working a number of odd jobs that normally forced KJ to interact with others, socializing still felt incredibly robotic for her. But, she also remembers her mother not raising an impolite asshole for thirteen years.

[kjacksel-blog]

& VERA VALDES.

She had to avoid the urge to roll her eyes, of course, someone of KJ’s history would take to a nickname. Vera had read her case many times over, the extensive treatments and screenings and diagnostics that the woman had endured, it made Vera wonder two things. Had she really been so dangerous? Or had the institution that profiled her just been overly insensitive to her nature? Vera knew it could be either of the two, or a combination of both, but knew it was better not to ask. It was better not to learn anything personal about Kalayah that might even remotely prompt a flicker of remorse from Vera.

“Yes, well, do not grow comfortable with the name, you shouldn’t have to use it.” She said abruptly, hands going into her jacket pockets and eyes casing the living room once more. “When you were twenty-five, you were not living under our laws. In Norway, we are more, how do you say…” She paused, digging for the English word. “Precautionary… about your kind.” Vera looked directly at Kalayah then, making sure that the woman understood how serious this was, and that she would not just make it go away when she chose. The situation was frankly out of both of their hands. “Do not take offense, your case is no different than any other Silver being we have under our care.” Not entirely the truth, but as far as Kalayah was concerned, it didn’t matter how sensitive her case was in the Institute’s archives. “Now, my job entitles me to ask you a series of questions to which you must reply honestly and to the best of your ability. Would you like to take a seat? Should you comply easily, this will be quick and pain-free for us both.”

KJ gives another short laugh. “Believe me. Any name you or the LSRI give me will make me feel anything but comfortable.” This woman was something else, wasn’t she? Perhaps, KJ shouldn’t judge the woman. She was just doing her job, despite it being absolutely terrible. As her inner struggle for being both pissed off and understanding towards this woman and the whole situation, her headache increased. “I see.” She says, meeting Vera’s eyes. Precautionary. Just a government polite word to explain that actions will eventually be done to prevent something unpleasant or dangerous happening, no matter the cost or who it was.

KJ’s eyes narrowed, brows crinkling. Her voice is calm as she speaks her next works, but there’s no doubt there’s a level of tension in her voice. “I don’t believe you should be telling me what I should and shouldn’t be taking offense to,” KJ says with her patience now on thin ice. “Now, I’m willing to cooperate with you and your government bullshit, precautionary rules. – But do not come into my home and tell me what I should and shouldn’t be feeling. Understood? The least there could be is an inch of respect between the both of us to make this a touch easier.”

A small voice echoes in the back of her head. SR8006438, sit. We have questions for you. This won't take long. It did take long. The session took two and a half hours. If they didn't like an answer, she would get a shock. The voltage went up everytime. KJ sighs and moves towards the dining room table to grab a chair and place in front of the living room couch exactly six feet away. “You can take the couch, if you want.”