#tw trauma

[kaitlyns-world]

Waking up being touched as a child 😓

Waking up not being touched as an adult 😰😰

(This is one time I feel the need to say this is just about me and not a bad taste joke about abuse)

[theshowtimesystem]

was any of it real? or was i just being dramatic? it doesnt feel valid

[kaitlyns-world]

"she shh shh"

As he violates me hyperventilating traumatised body

[uurloyalpup]

tw for venting and grooming mentioned

I remember once I posted a call out on someone who groomed me horribly and horrifically, one that haunts me daily, and someone reblogged it saying something along the lines of

'kinda upset they never contacted me'

because I brought up that the person was targeting radqueer individuals. I asked that person to take down the post as it deeply offended and disturbed me and they never did. I wish I presses further. it makes me sick to think about it.

no shade at this person at all and if you know what I'm referring to do not harass this person or bring this up as it happened months ago.

I still get nightmares of both the grooming and this interaction. I felt so violated, someone took my most sensitive moment and nsfw posted about it. I don't vent about the situation often anymore nor vent in general.

I know this is such a non problem and that this is what the community posts about but it still hurts. I wasn't given help I was given pity and gross comments.

[normysticals-tears]

two diff ppl dmed me regarding the now-deleted poorly-worded posts mostly surrounding sa, consisting of myself wondering why i didnt understand the weight of it like i knew i should, and why i didnt feel affected regarding my own... alleged sa???

...aaaapparently it Is possible to get cptsd from how i was treated, AND is normal to thus become numb to the huge stuff and yet struggle immensely with smaller things like chores. hm.

mostly i just still feel such a disconnect from the concept of being an sa victim. like it feels Wrong to label myself that. and also it feels wrong that im numb to such stuff because of all the bs i went through??? feels like saying you felt nothing while being assaulted because you got a purple iphone instead of a pink one as a kid. it feels so silly. but ig it was ingrained into me that it was silly anyhow,,

[hollowed-self]

Trauma self

A self that is based on trauma, stems from trauma, is an embodiment of one's trauma, etc. etc.

(⬆️ This one is an alt flag cause I felt like making my own)

Religious trauma self

A self that is based on religious trauma, stems from religious trauma, is an embodiment of one's religious trauma, etc. etc.

With and without the halo

[uurloyalpup]

TW FOR TRAUMA AND DISORDER SPEAK

I have a constant fear of saying or doing something that moots wouldn't like or even moots learning something about me they dont like and leaving me for it. I know its stupid because I dont know you and you dont know me but I'm terrified

I was left by every person I loved for being radqueer and I find myself thinking constantly that it will happen again with another topic. bpd makes this even worse because these were my favorite people and I'm scared to tell anyone about myself now

I have always had this fear, it's the same reason my parents dont know about my seizures or disorders. I hold all of you above myself and try to cater to what your beliefs are so that I'm not abandoned again.

this is why I dont state much about me in my pinned post, it's why I dont post hot takes, it's why I dont bring up problematic people unless I'm sure my moots are on my side.

[candyapplesandjesters]

*For a brief moment. The briefest of moments...Marx feels the presence of a clockwork star. An explosive presence...from right behind him. As quickly as it came, it's gone.

Marx looked back so fast that it startled Nozel, Solid and Nebra.

“Wh-“ he was REALLY scared. “Nononononononono-“ tears were coming. “I’m not there I’m not-“

“Hey, knock it off with the dramatics!” Solid yells, annoyed. Nebra, however, KNOWS that something just… happened.

The mist mage was more perceptive than anyone took her for. “Big brother? Solid? I don’t think this is dramatics…”