wonder

traveler, artist, writer

[kymchiwrites]

60 Seconds of Grace

Last week I flew to Utah for vacation. On the way to the airport, I got a message from the Delta app informing me that my flight would be delayed for at least an hour. At first, I was really annoyed. I thought of all the things I could’ve done if I had known sooner, like sleep in a little bit more (heh). But my mom reminded me to just enjoy the experience. Delays are a part of the travel experience and since it’s been more than a year since I had flown, to just embrace all aspects of traveling. 

And she was right. Since I had an extra hour, I had time to buy coffee and read a few chapters from my book before heading to my gate. 

But I wasn’t the only one who was annoyed by the delay. When I got to my gate, I heard a few people worrying about what time we would land in Utah. “We have a connecting flight.” “Us, too” “By the time we land we’ll literally only have a few minutes to run to our gate if we want to make our next flight.” “I know, I hope the gate isn’t too far, because if worse comes to worse, the next flight out might not be until tonight.” 

Hearing that made me glad that Salt Lake City was my final destination. But I was a bit worried for them too and hoped, for their sake, that there wouldn’t be any further delays. 

Thankfully, our plane was able to leave at the new scheduled departure time and the flight was more or less uneventful. As we prepared for landing, the flight attendant made an announcement: “Ladies and gentlemen, I know this delay is unfortunate but there are a few people who have connecting flights that they need to catch once we land.” He then asked the people with connecting flights to raise their hands. “Okay, everybody take a look at those whose hands are raised. When we land, I am asking everyone to give them 60 seconds of grace. Just 60 seconds for them to get up, grab their stuff and make it to their next flight.” 

And when we landed, that’s exactly what happened. As soon as the seatbelt sign turned off, everyone stayed seated except for the 10-15 people who had raised their hands. I watched as they stood, grabbed their bags from the overhead bins and quickly made their way down the aisle. 

But what was amazing, is that everyone gave more than 60 seconds. Even though the minute of grace had ended, everyone stayed seated until the last person with the connecting flight was out the door. That’s when they all started to stand and grab their things. 

This display of kindness was a really great way to start this trip. After the year we’ve had it helped restore my faith in humanity. And reminded me that sometimes people just need 60 seconds of grace. Of patience. Of understanding. It’s may not seem like much, but for someone else, it makes the world of a difference.  

I hope all those with connecting flights were able to make it on time. I’d like to believe they did, all because a plane full of travelers gave 60 seconds of grace.  

[kymchiwrites]

Golden hour.

6.16.21 // 2046

[kymchiwrites]

Hotpot with friends

4.13.21 // 1800

[kymchiwrites]

I remember reading this quote when I was in high school. But it wasn’t until recently that I really thought about what it meant. When Shakespeare said that when you call a rose by another name, it would still smell sweet, he means that what matters is what something is, not what it is called. 

We all have our given name. But what other names have we called ourselves? Or maybe even what others have called us? “Ugly” “Fat” “Weird” “Failure” “Not Enough.” Those are all names I’ve called myself before (and still sometimes do). But if what matters is what we are and not what we’re called, then who are we? 

God calls us His. We are His sons and daughters. And that will never change, no matter how many times we run away from Him. His arms will always be open, ready to embrace us. So don’t let those kinds of names define you. Gently remind yourself to stop giving yourself false names that make you feel you are not enough, loved, or worth it. And even if other people call you names other than who God says you are, don’t pay attention to them. Remember and rest in the fact that you are first and foremost a child of the Heavenly King. What matters most is that we are His. Always. No other name whether good or bad can ever take that away 💞

[kymchiwrites]

Today is uncle Chester’s birthday. Our first birthday without him. So to remember and honor him in a special way, I volunteered at the vaccination clinic today. When I got there, I was pleasantly surprised to see three of my leads and a former 4E Oncology coworker there. Even though I didn’t tell them the special reason I was here today, I think God knew that I would need them there. Their presence gave me a comfort and support that I didn’t think I would need. 

During the morning huddle before our doors opened to the public, the registration lead mentioned that roughly 1 million San Diegans had already been fully vaccinated. Since San Diego’s population is around 3 million, that’s already 1/3! And today, we’re adding another 2,600 people to that number because we’re giving Moderna and Pfizer first and second doses. The room erupted in applause. 

It’s crazy to think that just a year ago, we were starting to get into the thick of the pandemic. My unit had just been converted into a COVID ward and there was a lot of fear and anxiety in the air. But one year later, we are standing in an old Sears building that has been converted into a vaccination clinic and giving hope to our community. 

Our unit had set a goal to volunteer 100 hours at the vaccination clinic. When I left work yesterday morning, we were at 80 hours. And because there was 4 of us from 4E volunteering today, we made the other 20 hours—reaching our goal of 100 hours. This is a special milestone that I’m so grateful God gifted me today. 

Since I was giving Modern-a second doses, the people I saw were even more excited because in a few weeks they would get the full immunity effect. Masks couldn’t hide the smiles that reached their eyes. They talked about vacation plans, going out to eat in restaurants again and family members they would finally be able to see. 

One girl told me she was deathly scared of needles, to the point that she’s skipped a lot of her immunisations because that’s how afraid she is. But when the vaccine came out, she said she knew she had to do her part. Even though she was scared. Even though I had to give her vaccine while she laid in a stretcher because she might faint afterwards. She still showed up. 

 I got a lot of “thank you’s” but I  told them that they deserved a thank you too. For being brave. For showing up. For taking care of themselves. For prioritising not only their health but the health of those around them. 

After the clinic, mommy and I stopped by the grocery store to buy flowers for uncle Chester. We visited his grave and laid the purple (his favourite color) flowers there. My heart still aches and I wish I could hear him laugh or tease me again. But in the midst of the hurt, I am grateful for the the joy that peeked through. For all the ways God made me smile today. For the hope that there is more to this life. And the promise that there’s an eternity to look forward to. 

[kymchiwrites]

“If roses tried to be sunflowers, they would lose their beauty; and if sunflowers tried to be roses, they would lose their strength." - Matshona Dhliwayo

I’ve always had curly/wavy hair. But everyone I saw on TV or in media had straight hair. And it kind of made me feel like to be beautiful, I had to have straight hair. So when we went back to the Philippines for vacation, I wanted to get rebonded. But when we went to the salon, the stylist said that I was too young to have so many chemicals in my hair and suggested that I come back in a few years when I was older. My mole was another issue. Every time I visited some of our relatives, one would always comment that I should get my mole surgically removed because 1) what if it turns to cancer and 2) it would make me look prettier. Like it was something that had to be removed in order for my “beauty” to fully shine through.

I never ended up getting my hair rebonded and I grew to love my wavy hair. It’s something people frequently compliment me on. I also still have my mole hehe and have no plans on removing it. In fact, it’s one of my most favorite parts of myself. Sometimes I think back to that day that I almost lost my natural hair style because I didn’t think it was “pretty” enough. Or to the days I would photoshop my mole and wonder if I really did look better without it. And I’m so glad that I didn’t. I’m glad I decided to embrace these parts that make me me.  

So here’s just a small reminder that we are all unique. The things you don’t like about yourself might be things people wish they could have (your hair style, your mole, your freckles, etc). Embrace the things that make you, you. Besides, if we were all roses or sunflowers, gardens would be a pretty boring place, right?

[kymchiwrites]

Raya

My friends and I watched Raya last night and I… LOVED IT. I felt like it was a beautifully made movie and it was heartwarming to see their little “save the world” gang grow bigger and bigger the more they move forward in their journey. 

But the moment that really stood out to me was how they saved the world. Let me write a little background for context. The movie centres around an orb, that Sisu (a dragon), used to defeat the Druun (evil spirits that ravenge Kumandra and turn people into stone). However, when the Druun was defeated, instead of uniting, the people of Kumandra fought each other to gain possession of the orb, which they believed had magical powers. This power struggle divides Kumandra into five tribes: Fang, Heart, Spine, Talon, and Tail. 

Raya is from Heart, and they have been protectors of the orb for generations. Her father believes that the five tribes can still come together as one. So in an attempt to unify all the tribes, he hosts a feast. During this feast, Raya befriends Namaari, the daughter of the Fang chief. Bonding over their shared love of Sisu, the dragon that saved the world, Namaari gives Raya a dragon pendent. In return, Raya shows Namaari the location of the orb. However, Namaari betrays Raya and send signals to her tribe members to steal the orb. Chaos ensues as the other tribes also fight for the orb, which results in it breaking into five pieces. Each tribe member runs away with a piece of the orb, as the Druun reappears and wrecks havoc again. 

In the following years, Raya then looks for Sisu, in the hopes that Sisu can help her recover the missing pieces of the orb, defeat the Druun again and bring everyone back. Let’s fast forward a bit: with the help of Boun, “con-baby” and monkeys, and Tong, they now have four of the orb pieces. The only piece left to complete the orb belongs to Fang. Raya plans to steal the orb. But Sisu has another idea: she says that Raya should take a leap of faith and reach out too Namaari. Namaari was only a kid when the chaos happened, and maybe she would also want to help save the world. 

Raya is skeptical, but she agrees. However, at the meeting place, Namaari betrays her again—threatening to take the orb and Sisu. Sisu tries to calm Namaari down, telling her that she believes in her, that deep down she knows Namaari will do what’s right. But an overreaction from Raya’s part causes Namaari to accidentally kill Sisu with an arrow. Sisu’s death causes the waters to dry up (which was a protective barrier against the Druuns), allowing the Druuns to now have full control over the land. 

Long story short, Raya has been betrayed by Namaari as a child and again, as an adult. Both times, Raya has been the one to take the first step forward, to trust that Namaari can be a friend. But this second betrayal leads to the death of Sisu, which dries up the water (a barrier against the Druun), and allows the Druun to have full control over the land. Raya and Namaari battle once again, and Raya’s anger and thirst for revenge is justfiable. There’s a saying that says “Fool me once, that’s on you. Fool me twice, that’s on me.” Raya’s anger isn’t only directed at Namaari, it’s also directed at herself because against her better judgement, she chose to trust again. But the results were the same. 

Raya eventually abandons her fight against Namaari, when she sees the rest of her team using the other 3 pieces of the orb to ward off the Druuns and to save the people of Fang. Raya joins their fight, but soon realises that it’s not enough, even after Namaari has joined their cause. The orb pieces are slowly losing their power. She then realises that they have to put the pieces back together—to become one, just like when Sisu used the orb to defeat the Druuns years ago. Her team is skeptical; they’ve already seen how Namaari has betrayed them time and time again and they’ve vowed not to make the same mistake. Raya then says “Then let me take the first step,” and hands her orb piece to Namaari. The Druuns soon overtake her and she turns to stone. Boun, “con-baby” and monkeys, and Tong eventually decide to follow her lead and one by one, they give their orb pieces to Namaari and take their place next to Raya as the Druuns turn them into stone. 

Namaari places the orb pieces together, but nothing happens. The orb doesn’t glow any brighter. It just turns darker—like all the magic is finally gone. She leaves the orb on a rock, joins Raya and her friends, and turns into stone. A few moments later, the orb comes back to life—defeating the Druuns and bringing everyone back to life. There is joy as everyone is reunited with their loved ones. 

So the moment that really stood out to me, was when Raya still chose to trust Namaari a third time, even though she’s been burned before. Despite the hurt that Namaari has caused, Raya was brave enough to believe that deep down, Namaari could still be trusted. That she still had the potential to do good. When Raya gave Namaari her piece of the orb, she showed Namaari that she forgave her. She didn’t settle for mere words; she showed it. 

Raya was the main character in the movie. I would have expected her to put the pieces of the orb together and to eventually save the world. It’s her right, isn’t it? The one who was betrayed, the one who did almost all of the work to bring Sisu back and re-save the world. She deserves to get the credit. But it wasn’t her. Instead, the honor went to the betrayer, the one who had caused so much pain. 

And to be shown that kind of trust and love, even after you know that you have caused so much hurt… wow. To still have someone believe in you despite your multiple mistakes. To see in action the faith that someone has for you. To be trusted again even after you have shown you were untrustworthy. To be given a chance to redeem yourself. 

This is how Jesus loves us. His love, grace, and mercy continues to be boundless despite the many times we distrust and we fail Him. His love never gives up. It chases us. It reminds us that we are worthy. That we can do good things. And that there is more to us than the mistakes we’ve made. 

[kymchiwrites]

Today I was reminded that God can handle and carry any and all of our emotions—happy, sad, tampo, irita, disappointment, kilig, galit —you name it. And I don’t have to worry about what He will think of me or if He’s going to judge me or if He will love me any less because I feel any of those things. Because He won’t. His arms will always stay open. His grace, boundless. His love, steadfast. And His faithfulness, sure. He will always be a safe place to run to.   

[kymchiwrites]

J

I was assigned to the “stable” Covid unit the other night, a welcome break from the high oxygenation patients I’d been getting used to. Here, patients were either on room air, or a few litres on nasal cannula, waiting for placement or to get their home oxygen supplies arranged. I started off with three patients, and they were all pretty nice and good. So I was prepared to have a good night. 

I wandered over to the nurse’s station to grab some supplies and heard a coworker complaining about his patient. Let’s call her J. He was telling the charge nurse that they had gotten into an argument regarding her patient care. Apparently, she was not complying with what he was trying to do, which ended in her “firing” him and telling him that she never wanted to see him again. The charge nurse said she’d try to figure out how to switch the assignment. About an hour later, I get a call. I’m getting a transfer—they were moving the difficult patient to our unit, since she was only on room air, solving the “firing” issue without having to unnecessarily change the assignment. 

My coworker gave me report and retold the stories about their augment and warned me that she was very particular about how she wanted things done. Also, she had c-diff, which meant that she was constantly pooping. Great, I thought. And I was so ready to have a good, uncomplicated night. 

They transferred her to the unit and got her settled in. I introduced myself and it kind of seemed like we were off to a somewhat good start. J talked about the argument she had with my coworker, how she felt bad about complaining, but also that she just couldn’t stand a nurse who didn’t seem like they gave a sh*t about her and joked that she was a PITA (a pain in the a**). 

And then the pooping commenced. Every so often, J would call, asking for the bed pan. And that meant multiple donning on and donning off of PPE’s to put the bed pan under her, take it out, and clean her up. She preferred that we’d just stay in the room while she went; she said that since she was such a frequent patient, she didn’t get embarrassed anymore. And so we would stay. And wait. And while we waited, she would talk. And talk, and talk. I confess, I would look at the clock and marvel how long I’d been standing there, listening to her talk. At the end of a particularly long spiel, that ended with J in tears about her being in the hospital and her argument (again) with my coworker, she said “Thanks for listening to me, it really makes me feel a lot better.” And that… kind of got to me. Here I was, selfishly thinking about myself and all the work I had to do. Thinking “how much longer” while I stood at the bedside, sweating in my PPE, feeling my leg start to cramp, as I listening to her talk. Forgetting that in doing so, I was not only facilitating her physical health, but her social and mental one. 

J later told me when she was diagnosed with cancer and how her treatments had been going before she got hospitalised for COVID. She talked about her second husband, the love of her life, who had made all of her dreams come true. She beamed when she talked of her daughter, a lawyer in Denver. And then a touch of sadness in her eyes, as she mentioned a son she’d been estranged from. She must have been so lonely. Being alone in her room all the time; isolated, with no visitors. Having someone to talk to must have been a rare occurrence. 

When I got home after work, I apologised to God for my selfishness. And I prayed that when I went back to work again that night, that I would share God’s heart and be able to unselfishly and patiently minister to those who needed a tangible reminder of His love. 

The following night, we had to perform a procedure that would help relieve J’s constant pooping. She was nervous and asked if I would hold her hand. Before the procedure started, she instructed me to grab a bookmark from her daybook. It was a prayer. She wanted me to read it out loud, to distract her from the pain. And so I read. And stroked her hand whenever she squeezed it tight. 

After the procedure, J was a lot more comfortable and was able to sleep most of the night. I was glad, and thankful that God had changed my heart to be more like His. Nursing has always been a holistic profession—one that cares for the body, mind and soul. I guess sometimes I focus on the wrong things, forgetting that my duty is to serve, to give relief, to bring comfort, to share love. With so much isolation and chaos surrounding us, the gift of a listening ear and a tangible presence can bring a greater impact and healing than ever before. 

“Jesus was the healer of the body as well as of the soul. He was interested in every phase of suffering that came under His notice, and to every sufferer He brought relief, His kind words having a soothing balm. None could say that He had worked a miracle; but virtue—the healing power of love—went out from Him to the sick and distressed.” (DA 92.1) 

[kymchiwrites]

January / 01

Your 2021 Battle Cry 

Not really sure what “battle cry” means, but there is a verse I want to claim for this year. It’s found in 1 Corinthians 2:9 and says “No eye has seen, no ear has heard and no mind imagined what God has prepared for those who love Him.” 

This 2020, I want to surrender more of myself and my plans to God. To really be able to let go of things I’d rather hang on to. And by doing so, allowing my heart, mind, and hands to be open for the unimaginable things that God has prepared for me. 

The beginning of the year has already been rough, with the death of a very close family friend. Add the continuing increasing cases of COVID, and the political chaos, it’s so easy to feel hopeless. And feel that if this is how the year started, it’s an omen for the rest of the year. That nothing good can happen anymore. 

But our God is a big God. And like the verse above says, we can not even comprehend or imagine what He has in store—if only we trust in His perfect time and plan. So I want to hold on to this verse, in happy times and dark days. And remember that when God is beside me, blessings are always just around the corner.

[kymchiwrites]

December / 04

The most loving act that someone did for you.

One of the most loving acts that someone did for me happened a few years ago. I was going through a really difficult time. I didn’t have any energy to eat or do anything else; I just wanted to stay in bed all day. On one particular day, I spent almost all morning crying about this to ate Weanne. After our conversation, I found enough energy to go to the gym and take a boxing class, hoping that this would help me feel better. 

When I got back home, I found two containers of food waiting for me. Ate Weanne had ordered a meal and dessert from one of my favourite restaurants and had it delivered to our house via Uber Eats. During this time, she had recently moved to NYC to start her doctorate degree. Between living and tuition expenses, I knew she was trying to manage her budget as best as she could. And knowing that she chose me over her immediate expenses was a sacrifice that she lovingly made. Her listening to me was already enough. But when she made the extra step of making sure that I really felt that she cared about what I was going through gave me hope and a light on an otherwise very dark day. 

This is a loving act that I like to remember because it reminds me of the most loving act that Someone did for me—when He chose to come down to Earth as a baby. When He gave up His power, prestige, dignity, and more to become like us. To experience the same trials. So that He can truly be with us in our isolation, joy, fear, division, pain, and humanity. And eventually… to give up His life so that we can be saved. I pray that in the words that I speak and in my actions, that I can always point others to this most loving act, of a God who gave it all to be with us. 

[kymchiwrites]

December / 03

One thing you learned about joy

Earlier this year, I had the chance to be interviewed for Health & Home. The topic for that issue was about happiness and one of the questions was: “Do you think we can be happy all the days of our life? Why or why not?” 

I answered that yes, I think we can be happy all the days of our life because happiness is a choice. This past year has definitely shown that choosing to be happy can be difficult, as it is easier to focus on all the chaos and stress that surrounds us. But I realised that when it comes to joy, it’s not something we really have to choose to do because joy comes from within and is rooted in God. Joy allows us to have peace and sufficiency to see past the current situation and depend on God’s sovereign rule over our individual lives and the whole universe practically (Romans 8:28). In adverse circumstances, joy calms our disposition and reminds us of the promise: “In this world you will have many troubles. But take heart, I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)

[kymchiwrites]

December / 02

One thing you have learned about peace. 

One of my favourite Bible stories is when Jesus was asleep on the boat with His disciples and a storm came. The disciples were frantic, afraid that they would drown. They had to wake Jesus up because He was sleeping so soundly. And Jesus stood up, faced the storm and said “Peace, be still.” And the wind ceased and there was a great calm. 

How is it that Jesus can be so peaceful during a storm? It’s because He trusted in His Father. He didn’t focus on the storm, but He rested on the truth that His Father can and will take care of Him. That’s why He was able to sleep despite the roaring wind and the crashing waves. 

I once heard a story about a pastor, who was on a flight home after a conference. During his flight, a storm hit. The turbulence, loud thunder, and flashing lightning caused almost all the passengers to be anxious—except for one little girl. She sat calmly, her feet tucked under her, looking at her picture book, oblivious to the turbulence around her. Sometimes she would even close her eyes for a while before going back to her book. The storm passed and when the plane landed, the pastor approached the little girl and asked her why she wasn’t afraid of the storm like the other passengers were. The little girl replied, “Sir, my dad’s the pilot and he’s taking me home.” 

This year has been filled with so many storms—literally and figuratively. The waves of doubt, anxiety and fear may threaten to overwhelm and drown us. But like the disciples, Jesus is always in my boat. He may allow me to go through storms, but He will never let me go through them alone. After all, He is not only the Pilot, but the Commander of the Universe. So if the winds and the waves obey Him when He says “Peace be still,” I should let my anxious heart rest and do the same. 

[kymchiwrites]

December / 01

A time in your life when you received something you hoped for. 

The other day, a friend and I were talking about calligraphy supplies, specifically a vintage wax seal replica of Manila’s Coat of Arms. But this seal had been modified to include an initial in the centre. There were only 9 pieces available in the letters: A, M, R, E, D, S, J, K, and C. This seal was gorgeous, but after having spent so much money lately on other painting supplies, I couldn’t justify the cost anymore of spending more money on something I didn’t really need. 

These past few days have been really hard and stressful at work. Cases in San Diego are increasing, the hospital is running out of beds, and we’re short staffed hospital wide. Even though months have passed since the pandemic first started, it seems like this surge is worse than when it first began. All the fears and anxieties I had in March about what working in a pandemic would be were reignited, as it seemed like they were slowly coming true. 

Towards the end of my shift, I was exhausted and feeling hopeless about the current situation. I messaged this friend a few sentences about our lack of nurses and beds, and the surge plans we were planning to put into action. Since it was the change of shift, I didn’t get to check my phone again until I was walking to the parking lot. 

My friend had messaged me back. He said he was sorry to hear about what was happening, he hoped that maybe “this” would help lessen my stress. I opened the picture he had sent me and it was a screenshot of the confirmation number for the vintage wax seal (in my initial) I had been wanting.

I was shocked. This was definitely something I wanted, didn’t expect, but was so graciously given to me. 

When I first read this prompt, I started writing about how I passed the NCLEX, how long I had waited and worked for it. Then I realised, God has given me so many little things I had been hoping for. Sometimes I tend to focus on all the “big” things, the big and obvious miracles, that I neglect to notice how God blesses us every day. 

In Jeremiah 32:40-41 it says “And I will make an everlasting covenant with them: I will never stop doing good for them. I will find joy in doing good for them.” 

God cares about the things I care about—big or small. And He delights in giving me things that He knows will make me happy. He knew that I had been feeling exhausted and hopeless, so He worked through a friend to show me a reminder of His love. That He is still working for me even in the chaos. And that if He can give me things I dream of, how much more provide for my needs, and strength I need to get through each day.  

[kymchiwrites]

November / 03

The last opportunity you took.

Earlier this month, the Philippines was hit with two major typhoons that has caused a lot of damage and destruction. I saw so many pictures of houses damaged, of people wading in chest-high water, and others waiting on top of rooftops to be rescued. The situation seemed so hopeless. And then, people started moving. Organising fundraisers, donation drives, food distribution and even providing boats to help with the rescue operations. 

On Twitter, I saw several artists offering to take commissions, with all proceeds to be donated to various typhoon relief organisations. It was so inspiring to see everyone using what they had to help those in need. Then I thought, “Why don’t I do the same?” 

In Thoughts from The Mount of Blessing, Ellen G. White writes “When we pray “Give us this day our daily bread,” we ask for others as well as ourselves. And we acknowledge that what God gives us is not for ourselves alone. God gives to us in trust, that we may feed the hungry. Of His goodness He has prepared for the poor.” (MB 111.1)

God has graciously blessed me with so much, not only for my own benefit, but to also serve those around me. So I came up with “Written Hope: Calligraphy for a Cause.” $10 for a quote or Bible verse on a 5x7 piece, with all proceeds to be donated to ADRA. 

But while I was excited for this project, I also had my doubts. I thought “Sino ba naman aka?” and if anyone would even order from me. Part of me even thought it was a waste of time. Then, last Saturday afternoon, I listened to a sermon by Pastor Jasper titled “The Art that Faith Made.” He shared his testimony about how he used digital media, specifically photography and film making to share the gospel with others. He’s worked with numerous companies, including PAL Airlines and has even been featured several times in National Geographic. Surprisingly, he doesn’t have an art background; he’s actually a theology major. But when he realised the people he could reach through digital media, he used what he had to learn as best as he could. He stayed faithful and used what God provided him and God grew his ministry to what it is today. 

Listening to that sermon encouraged me, like God was telling me that I’m on the right track… that this project is not going to be a waste of time. This talent that He has blessed me with… is something I can use to not only share His words with others, but help provide food, shelter, clothes for someone else. 

Unfortunately even after all that, I still doubted. Up until the time I posted about Written Hope on my social medias, I was still feeling insecure. So I prayed. I told God that I have 40 papers and envelopes. My goal sana is to be able to use all 40. But if not, I would be happy with kahit 10 commissions lang. 10 is a “success” for me, and 40 would be a miracle. 

By the end of Saturday night, I had 10 commissions. I was so overwhelmed I felt like crying. It was like God telling me “Oh, ye of little faith.” Throughout the week, I got several more commissions… some from people I didn’t even know. Others donated more than the price for 1 quote, but still only requested 1 piece. As of right now, the amount of money raised through this project was as if I had 30 commissions. 

Looking back, I’m amazed at how God has moved this week. This project has not only raised funds for typhoon victims, but it has also strengthened and grown my faith. It’s made me realise how much more God is able to do, if only we trust Him. All we have to do is be faithful with what we have for His glory. And He will provide more than we can imagine. 

[kymchiwrites]

November / 02

The reason behind the last time you laughed hard. 

A friend and I have been watching Marvel movies over these past few months. Because of the pandemic and lockdown, our schedules had become less hectic that we were able to commit one day a week to watch a movie + chikka afterwards. 

This past week, after our movie night, we were just catching up. One of our reoccurring topics was our (nonexistent lol) love lives. And lately I’d been thinking that her and another friend would be a good match. They were already good friends, got along really well, and had very similar interests. So I decided to see what her thoughts about our other friend would be, if she was even open to the idea. 

But for some reason, I couldn’t ask her? Every time I opened my mouth, I would just laugh. Not because it was funny, the possibility of the two of them, but maybe because… that’s how much I wanted it to work? I don’t know heh. 

So for about 10 minutes, we just kept laughing. I would calm myself down, compose myself and attempt to ask her. And then burst out into laughing again. I think I even got her annoyed a little bit because it seemed like I was just delaying it. But the truth was, I really was having a hard time getting the question out. 

1000000 years later, I was finally able to ask the question. The answer doesn’t matter. What mattered more was that I don’t think I’d laughed this hard in a while. And with the pandemic and all the seemingly never ending depressing and stressful worldwide current events, it felt good to just laugh. Literally out loud. Without abandon. Over the smallest, most insignificant thing. It felt good to find joy in an unexpected moment. 

The year is almost ending, but hoping to find more moments like these.

[kymchiwrites]

He is working in the waiting. 

Waiting is hard. Whether you’re waiting for your meal to arrive, for your test score to be posted, or to finally achieve your dreams… it can be tiring and frustrating. But the times when we feel that everything is still… like nothing is moving… God is. He is always working in ways we cannot see, working for our good. He has promised to prosper us, to give us hope and a future. Before we were born, He already had great things in store. 

We can look at this waiting period as time wasted, time we could have been doing something else if onlyyyy we’re already where we think we’re supposed to be. Or we can choose to see it as a season of learning to trust. Of letting go of all the things we can’t control and placing them in the Hands of the One who can. God is working, even in the waiting. And when His plans are revealed, I know they will be so much more than we could have achieved on our own.