happyness.

Rooted and built up in Jesus Christ, firm in the Faith. -Colossians 2:7

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im so angry....and devasted...why would you constantly treat me this way? Why? please help me understand. Please I can’t take this anymore

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tori kelly you are my inspiration :)

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i miss you so much Mrs. K

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Master Cleanse Day 1:

I did so well for the first day... until my father ruined me. I wanted to hang out and he forced me to eat in order to leave the house with his permission! It kind of stinks how my parents won't open their eyes and see this whole diet thing as a healthy lifestyle diet, not an anorexic or bulimic disorder. However, they do think I have no reason to obsess over my weight, and yet here I am, obsessing over it. I just want to shed these baby pounds, is that too much to ask! Anyways, I'm really confused on what to do know because I bought all the ingredients and cannot return them for the money. What a waste. I wish I could do the cleanse without my dad freaking out!

So here I turn back to eating healthy and exercising. Which never works out for me.

[l-s-l]

Day 1: Salt Water Flush

I feel absolutely horrible. I feel sick and disgusted. This solution is making my stomach tight and due to the worst night of my life in reference to sleep. I literally felt like I had insomnia. Anyways I don't even know if this flush is working. I  hope it does because that would literally suck so much to do this and go through this and not have it work. I just want this all to pass. Quickly and now. 

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For my personal use: Don't mind this

Master Cleanse Blog: The night before the 10 days

It's 3:22 a.m. and I am literally asking myself why the heck am I still awake. I am anxious, nervous, a little hot, and sad. I don't know why I am feeling all these emotions. It is most likely because I have been falling asleep so late at night and I just keep thinking to myself so much. The Hawaii time difference is probably messing up my entire sleeping schedule and it will probably be a while in order for it to refix itself. 

Now about the cleanse, I am super anxious and wondering how I am going to stick with this these next couple of days. I hope I can prove to myself that I can do it, and also prove it to my family who thinks I am insane to do this. Why I am doing this is a little superficial. Yes, the main reason is that I want to lose weight. I honestly do not know why I have been getting so self-conscious lately. It's pretty destructive. I've been thinking to myself that I am not skinny enough, smart enough, friendly enough, and the list goes on. Basically, I have been getting uber insecure and it really needs to stop because it is doing nothing for me. I hope the cleanse will make me have more energy and detoxify all these physical and mental things about myself. 

I really need to sleep because I am doing the Salt water flush in a couple of hours and I am not looking forward to it. So goodnight. 

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USF was the only private school I applied to, and I wish I went there instead. I go to a UC right now, and it fucking sucks. There's a struggle just to enroll in classes, and once you're in, you have to fight the bell curve for grades. UC's aren't even that cheap anymore. In fact, by the time you graduate, it'll be almost twice as much as it costs right now.

I am sorry you are in this situation :( i hope it gets better!

thank you for your input :)

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cheesy post alert

nowadays i find myself thinking about relationships. and how i never see myself committing to a person or how i feel like and have fears about never finding that guy. i mean im not boy crazy but its just been something on my mind, since my best friends all have boyfriends LOL. i guess i just need someone to accept and love me for who i am and i gotsta wait for that special someone

CHEESY AS FUCK BUT OH WELL HATE ON IT

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18

I feel so damn blessed 

1) Thank you God for all the love that swallows me up everyday from my friends and family. You have given me a wonderful life and for that, I plan to make every bit of it count

2) Thank you mama and papa for constantly loving me and trying to understand me. I can be a total brat and at the end of the day, you still manage to love this hard head of mine. ITS A FUGGIN MIRACLE. i am honestly so amazed by your guys's patience its like damn

3) Thanks Kim. Even though you dont rely on me as half as much as I rely on you, you are wonderful and make me laugh and cry at the same time. Goodness I love you

4) Thanks to my brothers for being annoying and loving. Robby, you are the most hardworking person i know, you are a role model. Christian....youre getting there....haha i still love ya ya bish

5) Thanks to all my friends (PAL, Choir girlies, people I sit lunch with etc.) for teaching me so much this year. Memories have forever been made in my heart, mind, and fucking soul with you people. I wanna cry out of happiness with the fact that this year with you guys has been the best year ever. I want to keep touch with each and every one of you

6) Thanks to everyone who does small things that make me happy, like saying hi to me in the hallway or getting food with me. Its these things that make the heart happy hehe

7) Thanks to everyone. Literally everyone. Who has taught me something in life. Any lesson is appreciated and has shaped me into who i am today

8) Its been only 50 minutes of my birthday day and I FEEL SO GRATEFUL AND WONDERFUL TO LIVE MY LIFE.

GOD, MAMA, PAPA, FAMILY, FRIENDS, , I HOPE I WILL MAKE YOU PROUD BY BECOMING A BETTER PERSON EACH DAY. I LOVE YOU ALL 

I felt this was a necessary post to let my happiness out okay?

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I need to accept and tell myself that not going to a UC is okay.

Although there is that undeniable disappointment and sadness that I didn't get into any of the UC's I applied to, I can honestly say I am glad I am going to USF. I don't even know why I wanted to go to a UC so bad besides the fact that everybody kind of just sets their mind that they need to go to a UC. 

But honestly college is all about fit. It doesn't matter that you get into a prestigious school if you can't even adjust or feel right at that school. You have to know and one hundred percent feel that the school you choose is the place you see yourself for 4 whole years. 

Who knows? Maybe I'm telling this to myself for no apparent reason, or I'm telling myself this to make myself feel better. But I am content. No UC rejection can ultimately ruin or determine my future and it only matters that I love the college I choose.

And I do :) 

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i really really really really really really really wish i could read your mind

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black singing voices are like sex to my ears yo

why can't i sing like that

so much soul i might cry

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me: does a 30 minute jog

me: ok where my hot bod at

[iraffiruse]

[awakenedsoulinhope-deactivated2]

I’m sorry but this is too awesome to not reblog.

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Which colleges did you get accepted into?

USF, SCU

appealing to many

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11

maybe my sister. idk i have super super close friends but not just a single ultimate best friend

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1 3 4 37

i am a virgin who does both (but not too much)

i am insecure about never being good or smart enough