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My ride is HEREEEE
Gojo x hockey... hockeyjo? đ€
Saw a hockey AU here & it was so good I had to bring hockey!gojo to life
It's been a long while since I posted some Nanami... so here's Papamin đ€Č
Ps. Still have 4 slots left for March comms!
lukewarm take
i get awkward when people draw freaky deaky art and the background is white
like are we just doing this out in public?! iâm insecure turn the lights down
gentlmen higuruma and nanami
me asf
Satoru is not a humanâ ïž
i would die for gojo satoru
Synopsis: in which popular girl!reader is done with shitty players and wants to try the newest delicacy: virgin nerds. Itâs game on to seduce the physics student, who seems more than ready to abandon his life of celibacy.
But their arrangement only works if theyâre both on the same page. What happens when one expects a little more than sex?
Is it game over?
Chapter FOUR: Gojo is a thing of the past, at least thatâs what you keep telling yourself as you try to get over him by being under other people, but why does he still keep haunting you? Why canât he let you go?
Content: angst, fluff and smut all in one chapter, there's alcohol consumption, unhealthy coping mechanism, sex with other people, cameos from other JJK character, not proofread - pls let me know if you spot typos! Word Count: 11.3k
Chapter THREE - Masterlist
You lied.Â
You see him sometimes, around campus.Â
Heâs always with friends. Most times friends youâve met â Yuji, Inumaki, Ijichi, Haibara, even that âShoâ girl â and other times with people you havenât. Sometimes he doesnât see you, and heâll have that bright smile on his face as he talks to people animatedly about something sciency, youâre sure.Â
And other times, he does.Â
When that happens, you either turn away fast enough that you donât get to see his smile drop or see him wear whatever expression you think heâll have, or you canât tear your eyes away quickly enough to miss the half hearted wave he gives you.Â
Itâs better when he doesnât see you, you think. That wave is more crushing than anything heâd say.Â
Naturally, youâve blocked him.Â
You always block guys youâre done with. It gives you peace of mind. Except this guy doesnât; you wonder all the time if heâs tried contacting you, and what heâs said. Maybe he changed his mind and begged for you to give him another chance, maybe he declared his undying love for you, maybe heâll vow to dedicate himself to you for the rest of time.Â
None of those are likely though, because he would have chased after you the first couple times he spotted you on campus. But he hasnât. Not even once. And you walk away slowly on purpose to give him the opportunity.
Heâs never taken it.
âSo, itâs over?â Brittany asks, plucking her eyebrows in her vanity, and occasionally looking at you through the mirror. âYou ended it with him?â
Youâre in her apartment, spread eagle on her bed and staring up at the ceiling wondering why she doesnât have glow-in-the-dark stickers of stars. Her place smells like vanilla candles and expensive setting spray. Usually youâd fawn over the delicate scent, now youâre left feeling more suffocated.
Itâs tradition for you to go crying to her after every heartbreak, but youâre not crying right now. Youâre just taking shallow breaths. In through your nose. Out through your mouth. Careful not to inhale too deeply in case something inside you splinters.
âSure,â you say.Â
She sighs and puts her plucker down. âBabes, you donât have to pretend youâre okay â Iâm not going to gossip to those bitches, or any bitches, you know that.â
Through your lashes, you stare at her. Brittanyâs been your friend since you were children. Two girls meant for more than the provincial life you were born in, destined to wear hot pink mini skirts and tight dresses in a conservative town. Youâve followed each other your entire lives â sleepovers, first kisses, college applications half-finished at her kitchen table â and you know her loyalty is to you before any man. You can tell her anything.
Despite that, you still say, âI am okay. Heâs just some nerd, Iâm gonna be fine, trust me.â
Her pursed lips suggest she wonât be trusting you.Â
Which is fine.Â
Youâre not exactly trying very hard to convince her â youâre wearing a hoodie and sweatpants for Prada sake. Sure, itâs a sexy pink hoodie and Juicy Couture sweatpants, but the outfit tells the whole story. This is your version of waving a white flag. Hair unstyled. Makeup smudged into yesterday. No armor. She knows youâre devastated, and highkey suicidal, and you canât bring yourself to pretend otherwise.Â
You just canât say it. You canât say the words, say that for the first time in your life youâre actually experiencing real heartbreak, and itâs robbing you of the ability to breathe.Â
It hurts.
It hurts a lot.Â
All the other times donât even compare. The other times had you moping for a bit, stalking socials until your eyes burned, comparing yourself to whoever the bastard cheated on you with, buying curses from Etsy witches at 2 a.m., and eventually getting over them by getting under someone else. Youâd call it empowerment. Reinvention. A glow-up.
This time, however, you donât do any of those things. You donât even think about getting revenge. You donât want to hurt him. Itâs not like he said anything wrong to begin with. He was probably right actually; youâre not in love with him. He was just nice and you liked it.Â
This time youâre just tired.Â
Bone-deep tired. The kind sleep doesnât fix. And you so desperately want to sleep the day away, you want to let the paint on your toes crack and peel off, for your acrylics to grow out, lashes to fall off, and for your body to wither away.Â
âIs there a cute bridge nearby I can jump off?â
Brittany fixes you a blank look. âNot funny.â Then she groans, coming to stand over you and smacks you with a pillow. âGet up. Iâm tired of your bad vibes ruining my Me Time. Why donât you do some retail therapy? That always made you feel better, didnât it?â
Releasing a heavy breath, you tell her, âI already did. I have boxes upon boxes in my room still unopened. I tried to find happiness at the bottom of a shopping cart, and Iâve dug myself into further debt. It didnât even make me feel better.â
None of the cute thongs or super high high heels youâve gotten numbed the pain for even a second. You did look really cute in everything you bought though.Â
A ping goes off on her phone. She checks it.Â
Then she slams her hands on the bed, making you bounce. Brittany squeals. You wince.
âOkay, you better wax that hairy, depressed vaj of yours because weâve got a frat party to sleep our way through tonight.â
âNo,â you groan, already feeling the hangover clouding your mind. âIâm not in a partying mood.â
âThatâs too damn bad because youâre coming with me and thatâs that.â
Surprisingly strong hands roll you off the bed and drag you into the bathroom, and you know youâre going to walk out of here sore and bruised and in tears.Â
Terrific.
.
.
.
Itâs been a while since youâve been at a party, and you have missed it â the fun songs that get your hips swaying without permission, the sting of alcohol that burns a clean line down your throat and washes any doubts and stress away, and not to mention the hypnotic gyration of bodies that mutes insecurities and self-consciousness for a moment.Â
The air is thick with sweat, cheap cologne, something sickly sweet, and it feels like slipping back into a skin you used to live in. This is a damn good party, courtesy of Alpha Alpha Alpha and its president, Sukuna Ryomen â the kind of party people talk about all semester, the kind that makes freshmen reckless and seniors nostalgic for the rest of their lives.
Since you left him on read, he hasnât texted you; heâs not the type to chase. The fact that he reached out at all to begin with would have won you over if you werenât so in love withâ
âWhere have you been, doll?â
You grimace at the term of endearment.
You know, without looking back, that the captain of the hockey team has crept up behind you, whispering loudly in your ear so you can hear him over the blaring bass of the music. His firm hands grip your hips, hauling your ass to his front where he grinds his semi unashamedly.
âAround,â you reply, sipping on your cranberry vodka whilst you feel the music course through your veins, a synthetic courage buzzing under your skin.
Scarred lips graze the shell of your ear. âYeah? Well, I missed ya. Missed this sexy ass and tight pussy. Wanna let me have my fill upstairs, like old times?â
Elbowing him off with a scowl, you say, âNo, Fushiguro. Not after you slept with Jeanette before making me suck your dick the same night â that was freaking disgusting, by the way.â
âIt was hot for me.â
His annoying laugh catches the attention of people around. Guys give him a nod of recognition and girls bite their lips, and both look him up and down with desire and envy. When they see the hand he has making its way to grope your tit through your thin shirt, the ones who want him and only him snarl before turning away, and the ones that want you too grin knowingly.
This was your life beforeâŠhim.
Hated for being pretty and popular, and lusted for exactly the same reasons. A month or two ago, you wouldâve been high from the attention, dizzy on it, collecting glances everywhere you go. Now youâre just exhausted.Â
Despite that, you feel some dull thrill growing from where he touches you â a familiar, shallow spark that promises distraction if nothing else.
Lips murmur kisses up and down your neck, hands squeeze your hip and breast, his body presses insistently against yours. Toji has always been a fun time; he knows exactly what heâs doing and has never left you unsatisfied. Heâs easy. Predictable. Safe in the way a bad habit is safe.
But you shouldnât.
You didnât even want to be at this party, didnât want to be freshly waxed all over, all shiny and glittery, didnât want to be dancing or drinking, or groped by some horny asshole who has no sense of loyalty, and you suspect actually likes causing girl drama.
All you wanted was hiâ to be alone.
As youâre about to shove him off for good, you catch a flash of white in the corner of your eyes. Your head snaps in the direction, heart lurching stupidly in your chest. Shoulders slump in disappointment soon after.
Itâs just someone taking their shirt off.
Of course heâs not here. This isnât his scene. Plus, itâs Friday night â heâll be at the games cafĂ© with his friends, probably laughing about you and your pathetic confession, or building Lego sets and inside jokes, or making new memories in the toilet stall with his working dick.Â
And even if he was here, what were you going to do? Beg? Apologise? Roll over and flash him your pussy like it was going to convince him youâre good enough to be loved?Â
âCome on, ma,â Toji mutters. âLemme make you feel good. Iâll make you forget all about that guy youâve been with.â
âWhat guy?â you weakly ask, suddenly feeling lightheaded, like the room has tilted on its axis.
Toji spins you around, gripping the back of your neck to keep you in place as he grins down at you. âThe nerd, doll. The rich one. Nora was telling me all about how smitten you were.â
âYou mean when she was bouncing on your dick?â you scoff. Who told him he could call Eleanor by a nickname?
He smacks a wet kiss on your glossy lips, leaving behind the wheaty taste of beer. âNah, ainât nobody having full conversations when theyâre on my dick â she was on my face, which you could be in ten seconds if you follow me upstairs.â
A harsh smack warms your ass cheek.Â
âDonât make me wait long.â
With that, he leaves you.
Coldness wafts over your body that not even the warm bodies around you can fill.
Then, youâre having a moment of clarity â youâre standing in the middle of the room with a drink you didnât ask for, bass rattling your bones, sweat and cheap perfume clinging to the air in a sickly way. Strobe lights slice everyone into fragments. Laughter sounds warped, metallic.
This was your scene, your thing, your routine. Not Legoâs and fantasy movies, gameboards, Mariokart, and good fucking sex that ends in cuddles and kisses. Not slow mornings and shared blankets and someone looking at you like you were more than a spectacle.
Yet, tonight it all feels wrong, like youâre wearing someone elseâs skin. Brittanyâs off blowing someoneâs brains out, youâre sure, and you know she wonât mind if you leave as long as you let her know, and so you keep thinking youâll leave after one song, after one sip, after one more person tells you how good you look.
You donât.
Because the moment the beat drops, the ache in your chest dulls just a little. The thoughts that circle his name â his voice, his hands, the way he used to look at you when you laughed like you werenât performing â get shoved to the back of your skull by flashing lights and bodies pressed too close.
Itâs addictive, this numbness. The way strangersâ smiles demand nothing of you. The way dancing lets you pretend youâre still the girl who came here for fun instead of survival. You hate that it works. You hate that youâre already planning the next party, even as you swear this one will be your last.
Because you can pretend as much as you like that youâre no longer the same girl, that youâve learnt, grown, evolved, but deep down, you know, as much as everyone else does, you will never be more than a cheap thrill.
So, you push your way through the crowd, dumping your drink in some plant thatâs probably fake, heading for the wide open door which leads into the night and back home, where itâs safe, where itâs quiet, where he wonât be, and turn right to the stairs.
âTook you long enough,â someone says, smirking and palming his hard-on through his jeans.Â
Tojiâs waiting by the door, wrapping a heavy arm around your shoulders and mouthing at your neck as someone else eyes you up and down.
âRyomen,â you say. âDid you have to set a trap for me?â
He pushes off the bed, strolling over to you. Tattooed hands grope your ass, pulling you flush to his front. The frat president of Alpha3 licks the seam of your lips, tickling the surface with his tongue piercing. He rasps, âYouâre a flighty thing, sue me.â
The other guy slides his hand up your skirt, squeezing your ass and letting a finger push in under your thong, where youâre still not very wet at all. He curses and spits on his fingers, then rubs it on your pussy. Toji huffs and notes, âSheâs been distracted by that Gojo kid, too busy to suck our dicks.â
Sukuna tuts. âBad girl. You know this pussy likes to be passed around.â
âQuit it with the talking,â you drawl, grabbing both of their dicks to hear them groan and shut the fuck up. âPut your honey where your mouth is.â
They laugh.Â
âGod, youâre fucking stupid. Itâs almost a turn off.â
âWhat do I always say? Let your cunt do all the talking, doll, remember? Itâs smarter than you, thatâs for sure.â
You roll your eyes. âIs someone gonna eat my pussy or what?â
Toji grunts. âWeâre gonna get to that, donât you worry.â
Falling back on the bed, one holds you by your waist as you come to straddle his lap like youâve done many times before, and the other settles behind, pinning you between them.
Clothes fall to the floor, and the party downstairs becomes a mere hum through the moans and groans of three bodies joining.
And for the night, you do forget all about him.
.
.
.
âDo you believe in love?â
The blond man slides his gaze back to you as though heâd forgotten youâre lying naked on his bed, messy hair creating a halo around your head on his pillow. Heâs tucking himself back in his slacks, zipping it, before buckling the belt he hadnât even fully removed before he thrusted inside you.
Heâs a professor of History. A father. Widowed.Â
Youâve had a sexual relationship with him since first year, when he met you at a bar and you made up some story about being a working woman at some law firm. Heâd taken you back to his place, fucked you in a way not many of the boys from your hometown had ever, and was surprised, to say the least, when he saw you at orientation.Â
Professor Nanami was kinda disgusted with you, and with himself. He refused to see you for weeks, shrugging you off when youâd cozy up to him in the hallways. But he couldnât resist you for very long.Â
Of course not.Â
How could he when you wore the tightest, shortest skirts around him? When you had foregone bras under your basically see-through tops, batting your lashes and bending over his desk âto pick something up on the other side?â
Maybe it was because his wife had just died, or was dying âyou didnât think to ask for the details â or maybe he just really liked you, but youâve had a consistent relationship ever since he caved and ate you out on his desk. Every Monday evening, his least favourite day of the week, youâd pop by his place and get your back blown out.
Always the same position â prone bone. Your face buried in the pillows, ass hiked up, head occasionally banging against the headboard.Â
First he eats you out, you blow him, and then heâs inside you.Â
Like clockwork.
No kissing, not much talking, no staying over.Â
There used to be a time when youâd push it. When youâd pretend heâd fucked you to exhaustion and you couldnât lift a single muscle, hoping heâd let you stay just this once, but he was insistent; heâd rustle you awake, a stern look on his face, and with painkillers and a glass of water by the bedside table.
He wouldnât even let you leave a toothbrush at his place.Â
It was easy to start things back up with him. You showed up at his office, knocking and with a sultry grin. He pushed his chair back, beckoned you over with two fingers, and you thought he might say something like he missed you or ask where youâve been. He didnât. He just guided you down to kneel between his legs.
The rest was history, as they say, which is funny because heâs a History professor!
Nanami runs a hand through his hair.
âYes.â
You roll onto your side, propping your head up on your palm, watching him button his shirt with the kind of care one would reserve for defusing bombs: each button fastened with intention, each cuff aligned, crisp, controlled, contained. Itâs almost military. Or maybe militant. What would Sâ
Nope. Donât go there.
Happy to get an answer from him, you enquire, âDid you love your wife?â
He stills at that, but recovers quickly. Clasping his watch on his wrist, he wonders, âWhy do you ask?â
âOh, you know,â you reply as casually as you can, prodding the wet spots left on the bedsheets, âjust curious. You never really talk about her.â
âBecause the dead should be left where they are.â
Thereâs no bite in it. Just fact.
You sit up, the sheet slipping to your waist. He doesnât look. Not out of disgust. Not out of desire. Simply discipline. As if youâre another detail in the room to catalogue and move past. Whereas other guys would have greedily drank up your figure to get fired up for another round. You donât mind it.
Getting to your feet, you tug on your underwear. You remark, âYouâre a History prof â isnât it your whole thing to not let the dead rest?â
That gets a slight quirk of his lips. âIâm a contrarian.â
âFigures.â You huff. Then, you insist. âSo? Did ya?â
Nanami meets your eyes through the reflection of the mirror. He doesnât smile when he answers, âWith all my heart.â
That doesnât make you jealous, doesnât make you sad or angry. Itâs just what it is. But it does make you think. Voice quieter, you ask, âHow do you know if you love someone? Like, really love them, and not like just be horny for them?â
âDid you meet someone?â
At surface level, itâs conversational. Polite. However, you know from years of office sex and Monday fuckings that Nanamiâs not the kind of person to pry; heâs being cautious, worried that you mean him. It almost makes you laugh.Â
âNo, I was just wondering,â you say, trying to comb through your hair.Â
He hums, handing you your phone.
So predictable.Â
Men are always so frightened by the prospect of you falling in love with them, as if youâre so fucking terriblem, as if it means youâll be baby trapping them. And yeah, maybe you are terrible. Youâre shallow, dumb, and mean. Maybe he saw that and thatâs why he didnât want you for more than a wet pussy.Â
But you canât change who you are at the very rotten coreâŠ
Can you?
Soon, youâre being taken to the door, and just as youâre about to leave you look back at him, watching him already closing the door.
âYou never answered my question.â
Nanami doesnât need to ask for clarification to know what question youâre talking about. He pauses for a second, and itâs a rare moment of hesitation you donât see him take very often at all. The manâs knowledgeable, wise, older. Whateverâs crossing his mind you probably couldnât ever hope to understand. Perhaps he wonât answer. Perhaps heâll even scold you for prying.Â
But he doesnât.
Staring down at you, he says, âWhen every minute of every day without them is like dying a thousand deaths without any of the relief, and you can only hope to forget them for a second.â
And the doorâs shut in your face.
.
.
.
âThank you for meeting me again!â
Yuji sits across from you at a cafe on the top floor of the student union building. Heâd asked to meet, to treat you to coffee and cake after helping him get a date with a girl.
You wanted to say no. The idea of hanging out with his friend was weird. And youâd been wondering how much he had told them about everything, if heâd told them you were some psycho, and that he never wants to see you again. You thought that Yuji might cuss you out, might call you a dirty whore or something. But he insisted. Pleaded. And youâre not against free things.Â
âItâs whatever. Iâm just glad she said yes after all the work we put in.â
âNo, seriously,â he says, pushing the slice of strawberry shortcake toward you like an offering. âYou saved my life.â
âThatâs dramatic.â You take a bite, thinking about how a certain someone loves sweet things more than you do and heâd devour this in seconds.Â
âItâs not! Do you know how many times I almost texted her âheyâ with four yâs?â He shudders. âYou stopped me from ruining everything.â
You snort despite yourself. âYouâre welcome for protecting you from yourself.â
He grins, then softens a little. âShe said I seemedâŠthoughtful. That I actually listened to her.â
âWell,â you shrug, stirring your iced latte a little too hard, âyou did. Eventually.â
He laughs. âAfter you made me rewrite that message six times.â
âSeven, actually.â
âSeven,â he concedes easily. Yuji pipes up, eyes sparkling with excitement. âIâm taking her to an arcade this weekend, then weâll get some boba, walk around for a bit.â
No oneâs ever taken you to an arcade or gotten you boba. Is this how nerds date? Is that what heâs doing with some girl right now? Did he ever think about taking you on a date like that? What kind of boba does he like? Probably something insanely sweet and elaborate, heâd convince you to try it despite your complaining, and itâd turn out to be your most favourite thing in the world.
The third floor is busy â cutlery clinking, espresso machines hissing, students drifting past with backpacks and too-loud laughter. You keep your eyes on the condensation sliding down your cup. Â
A barista calls out a complicated order. A group of girls squeal over something on a phone screen. A tall figure in white passes near the railing and your spine stiffens before you can stop it.
Not him.
Different build. Different posture.
You take a sip of your drink even though itâs gone watery.
Yuji softly says, âHe does that too.â
Your eyes dart to him. He hadnât said his name, and yet your heartâs pounding as if he had. So fucking pathetic. Shuffling in your seat, you say, âI donât know what youâre talking about.â
âHeâs always looking around every room, looking at whoever walks in through the door, eyeing the crowds. He even smiles when he thinks he sees you, then frowns when itâs someone else,â Yuji elaborates. Thereâs a bittersweet expression on his face, and you wonder if he wears one too. You pretend your heart doesnât skip a beat at the thought that he might be searching for you in every face that passes by. âI think he really misses you.â
âNo, he doesnât,â you reply immediately, before your brain could even process the words. Then you sit up, meeting his eyes for the first time since sitting across from the pink-haired guy, who looks so much like some other guy you know. âYuji, we were never in a real relationship, did he tell you that?â
That furrows his brows. âWhat do you mean?â
So he didnât.
âIt was a deal we made. I wonât go into the specifics,â you say, waving a hand. âBut we werenât actually dating. It was just pretend.â
Yuji shakes his head, leaning forward. âBut he was always talking about you, about the things you like, the things you donât. Heâd see clothes in stores and say, oh sheâd hate that, or that would suit her. Heâd text you all the time and well, Iâve never seen him smile at his phone like that before. Even movies weâd rewatch, heâd talk on and on about what you thought about it or how he thinks youâd hate it, and so he canât wait to watch it with you. None of that seemed like pretend to me.â
Every word builds the pit in your stomach, growing it bigger and bigger until you feel so heavy you think you could create your own gravitational pull, like someone had once explained the Sun does.Â
Voice trembling more than you want it to, you deny all of that. âIt was pretend. Heâs just really good at playing his part. But itâs not like we didnât get along. He just didnât loââ Love me, you wanted to say. Instead, you gulp, and continue, âHe just didnât like me like that.â
The guy shakes his head again. He looks so deeply troubled by the news, and wholly unconvinced.Â
âI think youâre wrong,â he says, then quickly adds, ârespectfully. Heâs quieter these days, always wanting to go out, stay at our place, and go to every event possible. Heâs always super tired now. I thought it was because you two had an argument; I didnât know it was because you broke up.â
âWe didnât break up,â you tell him, firmer than you intended it to come out. âWe just ended our deal. Itâs different.â
âNot to him,â Yuji argues. âHeâs clearly miserable. Iâve never seen him so down.â
You sip your drink, gaze flitting away so you wonât see the flashes of memories of a man you canât see right now in his eyes. Numbly, you say, âHeâs just missing the routine we had. Heâll get over it.â
 âCanât you two just make up?â
âNo, Yuji. Itâs not that simple.â
âIt can be.â
Tired of where the conversation headed, you stand up, fixing your skirt. âThanks for the coffee, and youâre welcome for helping you bag your girl. Good luck, and whatever.â
Then you leave before he can say anything else about him.
Inside the elevator, you slump against the mirror. Your face is reflected back all around you. Itâs unnerving to see the dark circles under your eyes and the slight shake in your eyeliner. You snatch your gaze away. Can everyone tell youâre grieving something that was never alive?Â
A ping warns that the elevator is stopping. Someone gets in, but youâre only looking at the buttons.Â
âDiapers?â
You freeze.Â
Beat up converse, blue jeans, white shirt under a blue sweater, full lips, glasses, and white hair.Â
Your heart drops to the ground floor.Â
Heâs really here.Â
And itâs just the two of you.Â
The air feels thinner somehow. The elevator suddenly feels too small. The mirrored walls reflect you from every angle â your stiff posture, his towering frame, the space between you that somehow feels charged.
The doors slide shut with a soft, definitive ding.
Youâre trapped.
âWhat are you doing here?â Satoru asks, smiling widely. He takes a step towards you reflexively, arms rising. You step back. His smile falters, but doesnât disappear altogether.Â
Steeling your spine, you reply coldly, âMeeting a friend.â
âOh.â He leans back against the mirror too, arms crossed. âI was studying. Got a big exam to prepare for. Itâs gonna be killer.â
âCool.â
Your voice comes out flat, but your pulse is screaming. The hum of the lights grows louder. The faint scent of his cologne â clean, annoyingly familiar â threads into your lungs and drags memories behind it.
Thereâs a tremble in your voice you hadnât shaken off. Can he hear it? Can he tell youâve been miserable? Is he rejoicing in it? Does he feel victorious? Validated?
Does he look at you and think, See? You were just confused.
Satoru wonders, âHow have you been then? What have you been up to?â
Who the hell does he think he is? How can he possibly talk to you so casually, like youâre long time friends passing each other by?Â
Inhaling deeply, you let out a tense breath. âLook, we donât have to do this. We donât have to be all good with each other. We were strangers to each other before and weâre strangers to each other now. No more and less.â
âNo more or less,â he corrects automatically.
âFuck off.â
You can hear the sheepish smile in his voice when he mutters, âSorry.â
The elevator shudders lightly as it passes another floor. Then his expression shifts. The brightness dims.
âI was genuinely asking,â he says, softer now. âI really am wondering how youâve beenâŠâ Then, even softer, he adds, âI missed you.â
No no no no no.
He canât talk to you like that, he canât say shit like that, he canât weaken your resolve, he canât pretend he fucking cares. He doesnât get to miss you after telling you you mistook gratitude for love. After implying you only wanted him because he was the first man who treated you like you mattered.
Hands shaking, you clench them into fists so he wonât see. âDonât.â
âI do,â he whispers, insistent. âI havenât been sleeping much since âcause I keep thinking about all the things I said.âÂ
You donât want to hear this.Â
You canât.Â
Youâre supposed to be moving on, accepting that what you had wasnât real, that it was all just some game. He wasnât supposed to be here; itâs too soon. You wanted to face him properly, completely unaffected so that heâd never know just how hurt you were.
Satoru steps closer. âIâm sorry. Iâm really sorry. I was flustered, yâknow, like you caught me off guard, andââ
âStop it, Satoru,â you hiss, whipping around.Â
Your breath gets caught in your throat.
Fuck he really does look terrible, or as terrible as he can possible look â he has dark circles under his eyes too, his hair looks like heâs been running his hands through them, pulling hard, and he looks even paler than usual. His sweater is fluffier than usual, Converse more scuffed, and thereâs a quake in his hands as they twitch.
When your eyes meet, through his glasses his gaze softens. âOh, baby.â
Heâs so close all it takes is one step to cross the distance, to hug him tightly, to yank him down for a kiss and wash everything away. Satoru smells the same as you remember, all clean and fresh, and itâs comforting, reassuring.Â
The door opens.
âThere you are,â a voice says. âDid you bring my clothes back from your place?â
Satoru breaks eye contact first, looking at the newcomer. He releases a breath, combing his hair back. âHey, Sho. Yeah, Iâve got them.â
Itâs her again.Â
Sheâs sucking on a lollipop, raising a brow at you. A smile plays on her lips. Itâs mocking, like she knows something you donât.
Itâs so easy for them to talk like that, isnât it? So casual, so natural, like theyâve been dating for years. Did you ever sound like that with him to others? Did people feel jealousy ripping them apart from the inside, threatening to bring them to their knees?Â
âGood for you, Gojo,â you snark. The words taste acidic. Petty. Beneath even you. But you canât stop them. âYouâre finally using your fixed dick to its fullest.â
âWhat? No, wait, babyââ
You leave, heels clacking on the polished floor.Â
Someone calls your name, panicked, but you donât turn around. Not even when the elevator doors slide shut behind you. Not even when the first tear slips down your cheek. Not even when the sob youâve been choking back finally breaks free in the empty corridor.
Thatâs really fucking good for him.
Just perfect.
Peachy.
.
.
.
Heâs been trying to contact you.Â
A TheSmartest_1 had followed you on Insta. It had no profile picture, no other friends, no posts, but you knew who it was immediately. He sent a message. It plainly read: I didnât sleep with her, her washing machine broke. Pls unblock me.
It no longer matters to you if he did or didnât; youâve cried over it enough. Plus, itâs not like youâre some blushing virgin. But still, the thought of it didnât settle right, and even if he denies it, the damage to your heart has been done.
You set your account to private and removed him.Â
Then you received an email from one of your professors, talking about how someone had interrupted a lecture shouting your name, and that he had to inform this individual you donât attend your lectures, which was the cue for him to lecture you about the importance of good attendance and full investment in your education.Â
It confused you.Â
Not the scolding. Whatever Satoruâs up to.Â
A lot.Â
Why was he looking for you? Why was he trying to reach out? What else did he want? Was his dick broken and he wanted you to slap him back to health? Or did you leave something behind in his apartment?
The old you would have confronted him, asked him what the fuck he wanted, maybe blown him as a parting gift. The you now could only curl up in your bed, staring at the message and feeling tempted to hear him out.
Youâre curious, thatâs all.
Since the elevator, youâd been crying on and off. You ignored Brittanyâs attempts to see you, claiming to have mono, and definitely ignored Eleanor and Jeanetteâs accusations of you being pregnant.Â
You wish you were pregnant. At least then heâd have a reason to stick by you.Â
Itâs not too late to fake it, you suppose.Â
No, thatâs stupid.
No one would believe youâre pregnant with your impeccable figure.Â
Eventually, everyoneâs messages stopped, like they had accepted youâre a shut-in now. You didnât go to see Nanami on Monday, didnât seek out Choso for some weed and cunnilingus in the backseat, or Geto for an orgy with his groupies. And it was good.Â
Thereâs peace and quiet now.Â
You can do the bare minimum for your studies, donât have to do your makeup or shave or even wear anything other than some ratty T-shirt from home you never threw out.Â
But it also means listening to the voices in your head telling you youâre not good enough for anyone. It means having to bask in the dull clenches of your heart every time youâre reminded of him. It means rolling over in bed and reaching out for a warm body that pulls you in and mutters about how good you smell, and being jolted awake when your arm falls through air.Â
You canât even doomscroll anymore; your feedâs been corrupted by videos of people building Lego sets, of film analysis, of all the work the Gojo Foundation has been doing. Itâs like everywhere you look heâs there, and you canât bring yourself to look away. Once, you replayed the same video of him attending some event in a suit, with his hair slicked back, and his glasses swapped out for sunglasses, for hours.Â
When you shut your eyes, the video still played in your mind, like itâd been burnt into your retina.
A ping goes off on your phone.Â
Lazily, you pick it up and blink through the blur of your eyes, which had gotten used to the darkness of your room. Jeanette sent you a picture, and captioned it: I want the next turn when sheâs done with him.
You sit up.
Itâs a picture of two people. A man.
Him.
Heâs on campus, standing under a veranda as rain pours heavily, holding designer shopping bags â Tiffany, Chanel, Prada â and laughing with a girl.
âNo fucking way.â
The covers are thrown on the floor with the speed you jump out of bed, fighting through the sudden lightheadedness that threatens to send you falling, and hurriedly gathering your lipgloss and mini skirt off the floor. The curtains are torn open and the grey sky glares back at you. Itâs pouring.Â
It must have been taken recently, if not just now.
Sheets of rain slam against the windows, blurring the campus into watercolour streaks.
You move fast. Faster than you have in like a month. Shower on. Teeth brushed. Concealer under your eyes to hide the proof that your heartâs been shattered into a million pieces and not even nail glue could fix it back up.
You pick the tightest top you own. The shortest skirt. Something that says you are not the pathetic thing youâve been rotting into. Lip gloss swiped on. Hair brushed until it shines. Mascara layered thick. Youâd rather die than be seen all ugly and disgusting by anyone, least of all him and that skank.
The cold hits instantly when you step outside.
Rain soaks through your clothes within seconds, clinging the fabric to your skin. The mini skirt rides up as wind whips through campus, biting at your thighs. Your shoes splash through puddles with every march you make across the quad.
Students stare, point, laugh. You donât care.
Your phone is still open to the picture Jeanette sent. You zoom in as you walk. Itâs by the Quad, just a little away from the Physics building, where he liked to hang back in his free time to chat to professors in their offices.Â
The environment starts matching the background of the picture.
Youâre here.
And there he is.
Satoru fucking Gojo.
Under the stone veranda outside the humanities building, dry and sheltered, laughing like the world is light. He looks exactly like how he did in the picture, except now that you can see him in all of his glory, you can see thereâs even more designer bags hanging off his arms.Â
You can also see the girl beside him.
Itâs Brittany.
Your Brittany.
The girl who held your hair back when you threw up. Who listened to you cry about him. Who promised time will heal all wounds, who said she liked him for you.Â
Itâs really her.
What youâre seeing in front of you, the abomination that it is, is exactly what you expected, yet in your frantic hurry to be near perfect, youâd manage to convince yourself you saw wrong or it looked like her but it wasnât, or that Jeanette had done something to the picture.Â
But no, sheâs with him. Sheâs the one he was laughing with, the one that had stopped him from seeking you out. And heâs the reason she stopped texting you to ask if she could see you today or the next day. Â
The rain pounds down harder, plastering your hair to your face, your mascara threatening to bleed.
He sees you first.Â
His smile drops instantly. The bags go still in his hand. Brittany follows his gaze, confused. And when she sees you, her eyes widen in panic, in fucking guilt.
âBabeâŠâ she began, but you cut her off.
âWhat the fuck is this?â you demand. Your hands are shaking. Your entire bodyâs trembling, whether from the cold or from the delirious fury crackling inside of you, you couldnât tell.
âHeyââ he starts.
âShut up.â You donât even look at him. Your eyes are on her. On your best fucking friend. âHow could you?â you scream.
Jeanette, you expected. Eleanor too. But Brittany? Your Brittany, making a man who was never really yours hers?
Were you so unloveable that no one would consider your feelings for even one fucking minute? Was there something genuinely wrong with you? Did you have a corrupting force inside that makes everyone stab their daggers in your back?
Brittany steps forward. âItâs not what you think.â
âNot what I think?â You laugh, hysterical, gesturing wildly at the shopping bags and their general closeness. âYouâre on a date. With him. Youâre telling me Iâm mistaken?â
âItâs not a date,â she insists, exasperated.
Gojo cuts in, âIt isnât.â
âOh my God, donât.â Your voice is almost hoarse from how loud youâre shouting over the pounding of the rain, which threatens to send your legs buckling under you from its sheer force. âDo not stand there and pretend like you didnât ruin me and then move on to her.â
Water drips off your lashes. Youâre freezing now, teeth almost chattering, but adrenaline keeps you upright.
Brittanyâs hands reach for you. Your glare pins her to where she stands. In spite of that, she sighs and says, âYou need to calm down.â
âYou listened to me cry about him,â you say, voice cracking completely now. âYou told me he was bad for me. You said I deserved better, that I just need therapy. Is this your version of therapy? Sleeping with him?â
Gojo steps forward. âOkay, thatâs enoughââ
âStay out of it!â you snap at him. Even now, heâs defending her, choosing to protect her from you, because youâre some big monster in their eyes. Youâre the one trampling all over their Happy Ever After.Â
His jaw tightens.
Youâre soaked to the bone. Your fingers are numb. Your arms are goosebumped and aching, legs itchy from the cold. You must look insane â mascaraâs running down your face, stinging your eyes.
But you donât care.
Because theyâre dry. Sheltered. Together. And they look so fucking good together, so happy, and itâs you who wiped the smiles off their faces, itâs you whoâs disturbing them, ruining their day.
âYouâre dead to me,â you say to both of them.Â
Gojoâs expression shifts at that. Something almost pained flickers there.
But you donât stay to analyse it. You turn and walk away. No umbrella. No coat. Just the cold and the humiliation and the sound of your own ragged breathing as the sky roars above you.
Marching back the way you came, you pant, rain water dripping inside your mouth. It tastes salty. You donât see the people looking at you, the phones held up recording everything, and you donât know if Jeanette had seen everything.Â
You canât pretend you donât care about that, about any of this, because in all the years youâd spent debasing yourself over and over again for a shed of attention from some asshole, youâd never been more hurt, never been more devastated. Whatever was left of your heart has been set on fire, leaving behind ashes. And there were witnesses, videos thatâll remind you of the worst moment of your life.
Who are you going to turn to now?
Who was going to hug you, give you a pep talk, who was going to make you feel like a real person?Â
Who do you have?
âWait!â
You turn around, arms tightly hugging yourself. âWhat the hell do you want?â
Gojo bends over, hands on his knees and gasping for air. His clothes and hair are soaked. Heâs not wearing his glasses, yet he peers up at you like heâs never seen you more clearly. Your spine stiffens. âI want to talk, to explain.â
Disgust deepening on your face, you sneer at him. âSpare me. I donât want to hear every sorry detail.â
âSordid,â he says, then shakes his head. âSorry, sorry. Habit.âÂ
Straightening, he musters a weak smile, trying to look friendly, reassuring. His bright eyes scan your face, then your body, and his smile drops. âYouâre cold,â he notes, then grimaces. âI donât have a jacket on me; my sweaterâs soaked. But you can have it, if you want.â
âStop!â you screech, stomping your foot and sending puddles around your splattering. âStop pretending you give a shit. Go back to that fucking bitch and die.â
He leaps forward as you make a move to walk away. Gojo cages you in his arms, keeping you there with him. His heat envelopes you.
You gasp, outraged. âHow dare you!â
With a grimace, he says, âI know, I know. Sorry. I just need you to listen to me.â
âI donât want to,â you grit out.Â
This is the closest to him youâve been in a long time. You can feel the familiar hardness of his body, the strength in his arms, the pounding of his heart which matches yours in a perfect rhythm and tempo.Â
Gojoâs brows are furrowed so hard he forms a deep wrinkle that threatens to become a permanent fixture on his face. âIâm not sleeping with her.â
âBullshit.â
âNo, itâs true,â he insists, body a wall against your resistance. âI ran into her on campus this morning, and I saw an opportunity to reach you, to talk to you â I asked her to help me get you back.â
That stops your squirming.Â
âI asked her what to do, how I can win you back, make you accept my apology. And she said youâre materialistic; you like gifts. Well, she didnât want to help me at first. In fact, she screamed some pretty horrible things at me when I first asked, which I deserved. But she eventually quietened down when I said Iâd do whatever, no matter the cost.â
Itâs true. You do like gifts, but who doesnât?Â
And youâre not very happy to hear how sheâd been talking about you, like liking gifts was some kind of character flaw. AlthoughâŠa massive part of you has been calmed upon hearing that theyâre not sleeping together. Of course, he could be lying, but Gojoâs not the type. Heâs honest, a trait he displayed so brutally youâve been left picking up the pieces in the wake of his truth.
Regardless, youâre on edge.
He continues, speaking quite fast as though he knows your wrath will resurface and he might lose his chance for good if he doesnât hurry up, âSo we went shopping.â
âAll those giftsâŠthey were for me?â you ask, blinking.
A small smile graces his lips. âYeah,â he replies. âIâm not good at girl shopping, or shopping for anything thatâs not a toy, so I really appreciated her expertise.â
âThose are expensive brands,â you note like an idiot, not really knowing what to say. Slowly, your body succumbs to his embrace, unable to help itself.
âI can afford it,â Gojo says simply.Â
Sighing, you pat his chest. He gets the memo and carefully places you down on your feet. The rainâs still pouring, not as heavy as it was before, but certainly heavy enough that thereâs no one out in the park other than you two.
You mutter, âIf this is because of what I said in the closet, then Iâm sorry â your whole family thing doesnât actually interest me very much, no offence. It just came out, because I realised youâd never properly invested in me, in our relationship. Iâm not trying to use you for your money.â
âI know,â he replies, cradling your face in his soft, wet hands. âI know. I just wanted to do whatever I could to make you give me a chance, at least to apologise properly and explain myself.â
Gojo wipes the water droplets hanging off your fake lashes, and the mascara dirtying your face.Â
In spite of the weather, his hands are warm. They almost make you forget about everything.Â
âYou donât have to explain anything. Youâre right. About everything,â you say, avoiding those piercing eyes that felt like they could see everything in the limitless void of yours. âWe had an agreement: experimental sex, pretending, and absolutely no falling in love. I ruined all of it. Iâm sorry I blew it all up. You must have felt so uncomfortable.â
âI was,â he agrees, sadness lacing his voice. âBut not because I was mad âyou blew it up,â or whatever youâre thinking. I was uncomfortable because you sprung something on me that I hadnât been thinking about on purpose.â
âWhat?â
âI love you,â he says.Â
You shake your head, breath growing shallower and shallower by the second. You try to pry his hands off you. âNo, no, stop it.â
âYes,â Gojo promises, holding your face still and forcing you to look into his eyes, unobscured. âI love you, but I forced myself not to. I abandoned that idea and squashed it down, wayyy down, because it was wrong, because it would make you uncomfortable, because it would push you away. I mean, I didnât know it then, that it was love, but I knew what I felt for you far exceeded friendship.â
Blood rushes through your head, threatening to drown his voice out. You gulp a sob building in your throat, fighting the urge to run, to deny this is happening. In all the time youâd spent wallowing, replaying everything and imagining all sorts of future scenarios, this never occurred to you.
You never thought he could actually love you.
âThat night, in the diner, I sat across from you, watched you drum your pretty nails, bat your long lashes, scowl at every other patron, and I knew I was in trouble,â Gojo says, thumb brushing your cheek absentmindedly. âAnd when you begrudgingly admitted that you liked fries with the milkshake, all cute and wanting to pretend you didnât, my heart was basically yours, and itâs stayed yours throughout this whole thing. And itâs still yours now, even if you donât want it, even if you have someone elseâs, even if youâll just throw it away. Because I donât care what you do with it â itâs no good to me if itâs not beating for you.â
He opens his mouth to say more, but youâve heard enough.
Grabbing him by his sweater, you yank him towards you, smashing your lips against his. As lightning flashes above you and thunder soon follows, you lose yourself in his taste, a taste youâd forgotten.Â
Satoru melts, hands falling from your face to your waist, clutching you closer until your frontâs flushed with his, until not an atom separated you from him.
âI do want your heart,â you tell him. âI want to squeeze it, dig my nails into it, stomp on it, and make you feel everything I felt. And I will do what I want with it, because youâre right, Satoru; your heartâs mine, and Iâll scalp every bitch that tries to take it.â
A great, big smile brightens his entire face. The brightest smile youâve ever seen, the most genuine, most stunning smile. He pecks your lips, once and twice and again, and says, âThatâs the sweetest thing Iâve ever had anyone tell me.â
âI can be sweet,â you reply, shrugging.
He nods. âThe sweetest.â
Then he laughs, combing his drenched hair back. Satoru parts from you, spinning under the rain with his arms wide open, and eyes shut, basking in the darkness of the clouds. Droplets fly off him, some landing on you.
âI feel like screaming Eureka!â he yells so loud the trees rustle.
You laugh, uncaring of the strange looks people give you two, and actually giving an elderly couple a middle finger whilst he isnât looking.
When he moves to adjust something on his face and then frown, you finally ask the question youâd been wondering since you saw the picture: âWhere are your glasses?â
âOh, um,â he stammers, sheepish. A pink hue grows on his cheeks. âI left it in one of the bags today, after I went to the opticians to get, um, contacts.â
âContacts?â
âI donât know. I thought youâd like me better if I didnât look soâŠnerdy. Itâs stupid, I know. I was just desperate, I guess.â Then he pauses, peering at you through his white flashes. âDo you like it? Itâs kinda itchy on my eyes; I can get used to it though.â
Your thumb brushes over his eyelids. âI like you better with your glasses actually. Itâs always fun when they get foggy and you just throw them off so you can eat me out better.â
A grin pulls at his lips. He kisses you again, and mumbles a simple, âNoted.â
âSpeaking of bags,â you start, looking around and behind him, âwhat about my gifts? Where did you put them?â
Satoru blinks, then scratches the back of his neck awkwardly. He confesses, âI left them back with Brittany, but I donât think I actually asked her to wait for me, so thereâs a good chance theyâve been taken. Iâll buy it all again. Oh! Wait!â
He fishes in his pocket, fumbling against the soaked and shrunken pockets of his jeans. Metal clings and colourful keychains dangle in the air.Â
The pink tinting his cheeks darken, as do the tips of his ears. He avoids your eyes. âI had these made when I was out with the guys a while back; I donât know why I didnât give it to you sooner â maybe I was just worried youâll think itâs cringe or something. You can take it as a placeholder in the meantime.â
Snatching it from his hand, you marvel at it with wide eyes.
Itâs you two.
No, itâs Toru and his little wife.Â
Tears well up again.
âNo, no,â he says, cradling your face again with a worried expression. âNo, baby, Iâm sorry. You hate it, donât you? Of course you do. I mean after what I said, about how theyâre just toysââ
You shake your head. âNo, Satoru. I love it. I love Toru and his scary wife.â
He smiles, relieved, and whispers against your forehead, âI love them too. I love them so much. And now,â he says, hooking the Lego man on his belt loop and, with your suggestion, hooks the woman on your bra strap because thatâs the only place you have to keep her, âtheyâll be with us forever.â
âDefinitely longer than the end of the school year, right?â you ask, looking up at him through your lashes.
Satoru kisses you.
âTo infinity and beyond, if I can help it.â
Giggling, you point out, âThat sounds like a really long time.â
More kisses are peppered on your face, lips, and neck, and basically anywhere he can reach. He mutters on your wet skin, sounding much more serious and solemn, âNot long enough, if you ask me actually.â He whispers. âNever long enough. No amount of time could make up for what we lost, but Iâll try. By Merlin, Iâll try.â
You brush hair away from his face, realising that the rain had basically disappeared as the sun begins warming your skin some time during your conversation.Â
âLetâs just start with forever, shall we?â
âGood idea, Diapers.â
.
.
.
âPastel pink or hot pink, Toru?â
His glossy eyes lazily flit up through his foggy glasses. Tongue completely flat against your puffy clit, his words come out muffled when he answers, âWhat about something blue?â
You pout, brushing his hair back just so you can bunch it in a tight fist, yanking to get a wince out of him and so heâll bury his face even deeper into your pussy. âBut I wanted a pink set.â
Satoru pets your thigh, lapping up your juices. He says, âGet whatever you want, wifey, just get something in blue too.â
Beaming, you gleefully check out the La Perla lingerie sets youâve picked out, too excited to wait till they arrived. Ahh, youâre going to look so good in the lace. He definitely wonât be allowed to cum on them, which means heâll have to cum inside.Â
Sure, you already have loads of fancy clothes and shoes and bags from him, but what you really like are the lingerie sets. You have finer tastes. Scandalous tastes. Which he appreciates, and is always happy to indulge in. His place and yours are packed full of things heâd bought for you on a whim, and youâre running out of space and occasions to wear any of them. You really should tell him to stop spending money on you, but alas, it brings him joy so you shouldnât rob him of the pleasure of spoiling you.
Itâs a Saturday morning, and heâd woken up first. He couldnât handle being the only one up, so he woke you up with his lips sucking your clit hard. If he was anyone else, youâd have been pissed to miss on valuable beauty sleep, but heâs your Satoru so whatever.
When you cum, he shoves a pillow under your hips and lines his leaking cock to your pulsing hole, far too impatient to wait for the last waves to subside. Mewling, you chastise him, âYouâre in too much of a hurry; a pussy like mine needs to be appreciated in all its glory, Toru.â
âYouâre right, baby,â he mutters, kissing your neck. âAlways right.â
Every inch he pushes in robs you of more and more air, until youâre completely breathless as he fills you up. Itâs always so fucking good. Your legs clamp around his hips, ankles hooking behind his ass and pulling him deeper and deeper. Satoru bottoms out with a groan, whole body trembling.Â
He leisurely thrusts inside, taking his sweet time to reacquaint himself with your gummy walls.Â
Humming, you wonder, âDid you dust my orchid?â
Satoru nods, rocking his hips inside in short, shallow thrusts, prodding your g-spot over and over again with his flushed cockhead. âYeah. Lego sets tend to collect dust quite quickly. I -hah- made sure to be careful of any loose pieces, donât worry.â
âThank you. You know that took me ages to build, and I chipped one of my nails too.
A grin forms on his swollen lips. He replies, âDonât have to thank me for anything; Iâm always careful with your sets.â
âOh, thatâs right,â you coo, pinching his cheeks. âMy boyfriend likes to make himself useful, doesnât he?â
âHe does indeed. He loves making his girlfriend happy.â
âAs he should.â
Youâre gushing around his fat cock, clinging to him tightly. The morning sunlightâs warming your skin, reminding you that thereâs a whole day ahead, and as much as youâd love to, you canât spend it in bed, or in the shower, against the window, on the kitchen island, the sofa, the coffee table, theâ
The pointâs clear.
Sharp nails run down his back, no doubt leaving marks on his pale skin. âMm, Satoru, we might be late for the meeting if we donât hurry up.â
âCanât we just skip?â he asks, whining on your chest, and licking the beads of sweat forming down the valley of your breasts.Â
In a blink of an eye, you have him pinned beneath you, cock still lodged firmly inside your cunt. âNow, now, thatâs not very good of you.â
âPunish me then,â he retorts quickly. He had that locked and loaded.Â
You lightly tap his cheek, moaning in satisfaction when he pulses inside of you. âItâs not a punishment if you like it.â
âHmm, youâre so smart, baby.â
âThank you,â you say, giggling.
Satoru smiles up at you through his glasses, eyes full of adoration. Your heart beats so loud you think he might hear it. Grinding in circles, you pick his glasses off his face and slide it on your nose bridge.Â
âJeez, how do you even live without these?â The prescriptionâs high. Itâs blurry, already giving you a headache. âYouâre sure youâre not actually blind?â
His cock throbs, and his hips buck up, cockhead kissing your cervix. You gasp, steadying yourself on his chest.
âFuck, fuck, fuck,â he grits out.Â
A sly smile creeps up on your lips. Cooing, you draw a line down his chest, watching the red mark form, staking your claim. âAw, do you think Iâm pretty wearing your glasses, Satoru? Does it make you want to cum inside of my pretty pussy so soon?â
âYes, yes,â Satoru gasps out. His hands clutch your hips, fingers digging into the slippery skin. âYouâre so pretty, so fucking pretty.â
âWell of course Iââ
A Marina song blares. Your attention darts to the phone on the bedside table. Rolling your eyes, you lean over to pick it up, dropping back down on his cock with an extra force so heâll whimper and call out your name. You shush him with a glare, which has no real heat to it.
âHello?â
âThe nerve to be late when youâre the one who invited me here,â a snarky voice says, bored and irritated.Â
Your hips are still circling on his pelvis, wringing out obscene squeeeeelches! that you hope Brittany doesnât hear, but you donât really care either way. You replace the glasses back on his face, finding the thick lenses doing more damage to your eyes than the hours you spend looking at your phone.
Satoruâs panicked eyes meet yours. He whispers, âW-we should stop.â
âShush,â you mouth at him. Then, louder, you say to her, âRelax, weâre on our way. Itâs just traffic-y.â
âRight,â she replies, dragging the word. âYou really think Iâm gonna buy that when I can literally hear your boyfriend straining not to bust a nut in the background.â
Ah, well, thatâs fair â Satoruâs not being very quiet even though heâs trying his best; panting to get some air in his brain so he can think clearly, squirming so he wonât start violently thrusting upwards, and biting his lip as his eyes flit about your body, finding any bit of visual stimulation is killing him.Â
Not the least bit apologetic, you say, âWhoops.â
âWhatever, whore. Just get over here already. Some greasy loser is eyeing me up, and Iâm so bored Iâm actually considering it.â
You laugh. âOh, thatâs just Ian. Donât mind him. Although, I think youâd really like Dave, the barista.âÂ
âEw, heâs ugly,â she screeches.
Desperate to cum already, you hurriedly say, âWeâll talk more later. Byeee.â
Grinning down at your boyfriend, you throw your phone somewhere. The malevolent glint in your eyes makes him gulp, and throb. âYouâve got ten minutes to make me cum two more times. You got it in you, Six Eyes?â
Satoru chuckles, cheeks flushed and hands pulling you down so he can reach your lips. âHell yeah, baby.â
The ten minutes become thirty, and you end up a whole hour late to the meeting.Â
The bustle of the cafe on a Saturday morning slams into you in full force. A table full of people sit up straighter when they see you both. Some of them wave, one gives you a finger you reflect right back to her.
âHey guys!â
Your boyfriend pulls a chair back for you, and you thank him with a kiss to his cheeks that some gush at, and another gags at. That makes you kiss him on his lips to pull another gag out before sitting down and giving them all a fake, apologetic smile.Â
You pop a gum in your mouth to wash the taste of cum from your mouth lest Brit smells it and gives you hell. âSo sorry weâre late. We just had car troubles.â
Satoru nods, arm thrown over the back of your chair, hand resting on your shoulder. âYeah, was a very bumpy ride. Sorry guys.â You squeeze his thigh, fighting the urge to laugh with him.
Opposite you, Brittany gives a disbelieving look. âYou guys are disgusting, I hate you both.â
âTuna mayo.âÂ
âWhy, what happened?â Haibara asks, blinking.Â
Beside him, Ijichi adjusts his glasses and mumbles, âI believe theyâre lying about being late because of traffic.â
âWe were having sex and lost track of time,â you confess with no shred of guilt.âSue us.â
Some of the guys blush.
This isnât the first time youâve been late to a meeting with your friends; it happens so often theyâve actually started giving you the wrong time so youâd show up on time, and yet it almost never works. Youâve become one of those repulsive couples in movies that you roll your eyes at, and itâs the greatest thing ever. Because if thereâs anything you like more than orgasms, itâs making other people jealous.
Yuji, awkwardly wanting to move on, claps his hands, scanning the big table with a growing glimmer in his competitive eyes. He announces, âEverythingâs set up, weâre all here â I think weâre ready to go.â
Unsure, your bestie inspects the little pieces and the board in front of her. She asks, âNone of this makes sense to me. What exactly am I supposed to do?âÂ
Satoru proudly boasts, âSince my wifey here won the last game, I think she should do the honours of breaking your virginity.â
âGross,â the two of you say in unison, fighting back smiles when your eyes meet.Â
As everyoneâs eyes land on you, you pick up your piece, twirling it between manicured fingers. When you sense everyone growing tiresome with the wait, you finally say, âItâs simple. I roll. I pick a card and make a move based on what it says. And then I inevitably get targeted because apparently Iâm âtoo strategicâ.â
âYou are too strategic,â Yuji argues, already narrowing his eyes at you as though heâll be able to see into your mind and anticipate your next underhanded move. âLast time you built an entire alliance just to wipe me out for no reason.â
âItâs called foresight,â you reply primly.
âItâs called manipulation,â Haibara corrects â not as an insult, on the contrary, it seems like a compliment. âBut youâre right, Itadori! We need to stop her reign of terror.â
âI concur.â
âBonito flakes.â
Jaw dropping, you scoff. âOh so now itâs okay to gang up on people? Real honourable, you guys.â
âDonât worry, wifey. Iâll protect you,â the man beside you promises.
âYouâre the first one Iâm eliminating,â you say, matter-of-factly. Since you learnt the rules of the game, heâs stopped going easy on you, stopped setting things up so you could win. Now, heâs an enemy. âIâd rather lose than let you win.â
Under your hand, something grows. His eyes sparkle when he realises you know, but heâs not ashamed at all. He never is; heâs just happy his dick is working.
Satoru canât help himself; he pinches your chin and drags you over to give a kiss on your lips. He deepens it despite the playful complaints the whole table gives about ânot rubbing it inâ and âgetting a roomâ. When he parts, heâs chewing and leaning back in his chair like nothing happened.Â
That sly bastardâŠ
Waving a hand in your face to grab your attention, Brittany asks with a lot of attitude, âCool, but how do I win?â
You smile, leaning back in your chair too. Head resting on his shoulder and playing with the keychain on his belt, you tell her, âItâs not about winning, Brit, you silly goose.â
Satoru presses a kiss to the top of your head, a smile growing in your hair.
âItâs all about good storytelling.â
when youre broke but da plug got a better idea for payment đ
he's so silly i feel so maternal towards him
would you do something nerdjo related?! mayhaps a yearning man and an oblivious reader? my current hyper fixation lol
Nerdjo supremacy đ
Seeing clearly for the first time
The first time you meet Satoru Gojo, he walks into the campus optical store like heâs entering a boss battle.
You notice him immediately.
Tall. White hair slightly messy like he ran his hand through it too much. Hoodie half-zipped. Backpack slung awkwardly over one shoulder.
Heâs staring at the wall of frames like itâs calculus.
You walk up with your brightest customer-service smile.
âHi! Looking for anything specific?â
He looks up.
And short-circuits.
You are glowing.
Perfect hair. Soft glossed lips. Pink cardigan. Smelling faintly like vanilla.
He forgets how to blink.
âGlâglasses,â he says brilliantly.
You nod enthusiastically. âGood news, thatâs our specialty.â
Youâre joking.
He does not process that youâre joking.
âOh.â
You step closer to examine his current frames â thin, slightly crooked, definitely overdue for replacement.
âCan I?â you ask, reaching toward his temple.
He freezes.
You gently lift the glasses off his face.
His brain exits his body.
âOh,â you murmur softly, studying him without lenses. âYou have really pretty eyes.â
If Satoru Gojo were a computer, this is the moment smoke would come out.
âThâthank you,â he manages.
You smile like you say things like that all the time.
He suspects you do.
You guide him through options, holding frames up to his face, tilting your head thoughtfully.
âHmm⊠these make you look like a professor.â
You switch them.
âThese are cute. Very⊠smart but mysterious.â
You switch again.
âOh! These are perfect.â
You step closer, closer than necessary, adjusting them on his nose carefully.
âThere,â you say softly. âThey suit you.â
He looks at himself in the mirror.
Then at you.
Then back at himself.
He would buy anything you handed him.
He pays. Leaves. Walks straight into the glass door on the way out.
You gasp.
He wishes for death.
â
The second time you see him is on campus.
Heâs sitting on the grass near the engineering building with Suguru Geto and Shoko Ieiri.
Geto looks like he hasnât slept in days black hoodie, headphones around his neck, playing something on a handheld console.
Shoko is smoking and judging the world.
Youâre walking with your friends when you spot him.
You light up.
âHey! Glasses guy!â
Gojoâs soul leaves his body again.
You jog over.
âThey look so good on you,â you say brightly. âIâm glad you picked those.â
Picked.
He didnât pick them.
You did.
Geto slowly looks up from his console.
ââŠYou know her?â
Shoko exhales smoke. âSince when does he know girls like that?â
Gojo is malfunctioning.
âH-hi,â he stutters.
You beam at him like heâs your best friend.
âWell, Iâll see you around, okay?â
You wave.
And leave.
Silence.
Geto lowers his console.
âExplain.â
Shoko squints at him. âWhy was a literal campus Barbie talking to you?â
Gojoâs ears turn red.
âShe works at the optical store,â he mutters.
Getoâs eyes widen. âOh my god.â
Shoko grins slowly. âYou have a crush.â
âI do not.â
âYou absolutely do,â Geto says, delighted. âYou looked like you were about to pass out.â
âShe complimented my eyes,â Gojo whispers, dazed.
Shoko groans. âHeâs gone.â
From that day on, they call you Barbie Girl.
Gojo pretends to hate it.
He does not.
â
Weeks later, thereâs a crowd at the arcade near campus.
Flashing lights. Noise. Music.
Gojo only came because Geto dragged him.
Heâs halfway through explaining game mechanics to Shoko when he sees you.
Youâre standing in front of a claw machine.
Specifically a Digimon plush inside.
You look determined.
He watches as you try.
The claw drops.
Misses.
Again.
Misses.
You sigh softly and laugh at yourself.
âUgh, whatever,â you mutter, walking away.
Gojo stares at the machine. Then at you. Then back at the machine.
Geto notices.
âOh no.â
Shoko grins. âHeâs going in.â
Gojo steps up to the claw machine like itâs a final exam.
He analyzes angles. Weight distribution. Claw tension. Drop timing.
One coin.
He waits.
Drops it perfectly.
The claw grips.
Lifts.
Secures.
The plush drops into the chute.
He retrieves it carefully.
Heart pounding harder than it should.
He approaches you awkwardly.
âH-hey.â
You turn.
âOh! Glasses guy!â
He dies a little. In a good way.
âYou left this,â he says, holding out the Digimon plush.
Your eyes widen.
âYou got it?!â
He nods.
âFor you.â
You light up.
And itâs worse than the compliment thing.
âOh my god, thatâs so sweet!â
You hug the plush. Then before he can prepare You hug him too.
Just quick. But real.
He freezes completely.
âI tried like ten times,â you laugh. âThank you.â
âIt was⊠probability,â he mumbles.
You smile at him like heâs amazing.
âLet me take you to dinner.â
His brain fully stops.
âIâwhat?â
âAs a thank you,â you say. âMy treat.â
Geto and Shoko are watching from across the arcade like itâs live television.
âIâuhâI meanâif youâlikeâif you wantââ
You giggle.
âItâs a yes, right?â
âYes,â he blurts.
âOkay! Tomorrow?â
He nods too fast.
âCool,â you say softly.
Then you lean up and kiss his cheek.
Just a light press.
But it sends a shockwave through his entire nervous system.
His face turns bright red.
You grin, completely unaware of the damage youâve caused.
âSee you tomorrow, Satoru.â
You remembered his name.
You walk away again.
He stands there holding absolutely nothing but feelings.
Geto appears beside him.
âYou are so down bad.â
Shoko flicks ash onto the pavement.
âHeâs been down bad since the eye compliment.â
Gojo touches his cheek where you kissed him.
Soft. Warm. Still tingling.
âShe said my name,â he whispers.
Geto sighs dramatically. âThis is going to be unbearable.â
And Gojo?
He doesnât care.
Because for the first time in his life, The popular girl looked at him like he was worth noticing.
And heâs already planning what to wear to dinner.
almost yours â a satoru gojo fic
pairing â college satoru! x reader
synopsis â when you and your best friend seiko agree to split a too-big, too-expensive apartment, her hot older brotherâwho you definitely donât have feelings for anymoreâoffers to move in to ease rent. what could possibly go wrong?
wc â 35.4k (never let me estimate my own word counts again)
read it on ao3
warnings â smut, p in v sex (unprotected and protected), fingering, oral (f receiving), making out, brief 7 minutes in heaven trope (couldn't control myself sorry) tiny bit of angst, yearning (ur downbad for him), satoru is kind of a gym himbo in this one, kind of unreliable narrator vibes, afab reader, more inaccurate representations of frat parties and possibly frat culture ^_^
âYou go down there!â
âNo, I already went when I went to get some chips, itâll look awkward if I did it again.â
âOkay, letâs both go down there together then!â
âFine, but youâre gonna have to talk to Suguru on your own, his earrings are scaryââ
âWait but Iâm scared tooââ
You donât wait for a response, already on your way out the door before Seiko can trap you into her nerves again. Sheâs panicking about Suguruâs earrings and his intimidating smirk, and you canât afford to get tangled in her spiralânot when your own is spinning just as fast. Your heartâs pounding in your chest, the way it always does when heâs downstairs. Loud and stupid and unstoppable.
Satoruâs here.
Thatâs the real reason you said yes to coming over today, and you know it. You knew it even when you told Seiko, âYeah, totally, Iâll help you go over functions again,â like you were some loyal academic comrade. She said she wasnât in the mood to start until laterââWeâll just chill for a bit firstââand you nodded like that wasnât the exact outcome you were counting on. He was going to be here. Youâd overheard her say it in class on Friday, casual, âMy brotherâs back for the weekend before his flight. He and Suguru are crashing at mine until Sunday,â and your body reacted like it heard a fire alarm. Instant adrenaline. Sweaty palms. A weird twist in your stomach like you hadnât eaten all day.
Her older brother.
The one who used to help you with math back when you and Seiko were dumb little middle schoolers with pencil cases full of glitter pens and zero dignity. He never laughed when you got your decimals wrong, never treated you like you were slow or irritating. Heâd just nudge the worksheet toward you with a little grin and say something like, âWanna try that again, hm? You accidentally turned your eight into a three.â He was kind. And cool. And way too old for you, even back then. He used to wear big, floppy hoodies with strange anime prints on them, crooked glasses that slid down his nose, and he always smelled faintly like fabric softener and shampoo. Heâd ruffle your hair as he passed by the dining table where you and Seiko did your homework, like you were some tagalong puppy. And every single time, youâd sit there for at least ten minutes after, heart pounding, replaying the exact way his hand felt through your hair like it was forensic evidence.
But he doesnât look like that anymore. Not since the summer after his junior year. Something changed. You donât know what, exactlyâmaybe it was just time, maybe it was something elseâbut when he came back from his trip with Suguru that August, he was⊠different. Taller. Way taller. His shoulders had filled out like crazy, broad and solid under tighter shirts. He didnât wear his glasses anymoreâgot contacts, Seiko said, rolling her eyes like it was nothing. But it wasnât nothing. It changed his whole face. His eyes, already bright, looked sharper, clearer. His jaw had become something out of a magazine, all sharp lines and clean edges. And he got hot. Objectively, unavoidably, annoyingly hot. So hot that suddenly he was everywhere at school. Seniors above you whispered about him in the hallway. Seniors with perfect nails and shiny hair giggled when heâd be in the cafeteria with his group of friends. Even the teachers liked him. Everyone did. Liked him in a normal way. Except youâyou liked him in that humiliating, unbearable, long-standing way that made your chest ache and your stomach twist and your voice go all weird and high-pitched when he so much as looked at you.
You remember the first time you saw him again after the summer. Youâd put on lip glossâstrawberry-scented, sticky as hellâand youâd worn that white, metal supported bra, not your bright, training onesâeven though youâd barely matured enough to form⊠well, boobsâeven though it dug into your ribs and made your shoulders itch. And there he was in the hallway, laughing with Suguru, hair pushed back, earbuds hanging around his neck, and you remember thinkingâOh. Iâm in trouble. I have the fattest crush on him and he wonât even look at me. It didnât matter. You were sixteen now. Practically an adult. And he was actually an adult. Second year of collegeâ physics majorânineteen years old. Except now he was going to this stupid 3 year accelerated scholarship program with Suguru in Japan.
Now here you are, halfway down the stairs, hovering just out of sight with your heart going insane in your chest like itâs trying to physically escape your body. Suguruâs the first thing you seeâsprawled across the couch like royalty, all black clothes and nonchalant confidence. His hairâs tied up half-assedly, dark strands falling into his face, and heâs twirling something silver in his fingers. Probably a ring, or maybe a lighter. He looks dangerous and beautiful, and honestly, you get why Seikoâs so worked up. And thenâthereâs him. Satoruâs on the floor, legs folded in a messy tangle, like he hasnât grown a day since he was twelve, except that he has. So much. His plain white t-shirt clings just a little too tightly to his chest, sleeves hugging his biceps in a way that feels like a personal attack. His hairâs a little wildâfluffier than usualâand heâs wearing mismatched socks, one black, one striped, like he got dressed in the dark and couldnât be bothered to fix it.
Heâs laughing at the TVâsome variety show with screaming and subtitlesâand the way his head tilts back as he laughs, the way his jaw catches the lightâ
Your heart actually hurts. You stand there a little too long, shameless, helpless, your entire body screaming donât look, donât look, but your eyes refuse to obey. You feel twelve again. Small. Invisible. Watching from the sidelines like always.
And then he speaks. To you.Â
âYou creeping or coming down?â
Your stomach plummets. âIâwhat?! I wasnâtâI wasnât creeping,â you splutter, stumbling down the last few steps in a panic, cheeks already burning. âI wasâjust walking!â Satoru looks over his shoulder, grinning lazily. He scoots over and pats the carpet beside him. âCome on. Sit. Youâre just in timeâSuguruâs getting smoked.â Suguru flips him off without looking. âThis trivia showâs rigged.â
âYou just suck at memory games.â
You lower yourself onto the floor, trying not to hyperventilate. Youâre acutely aware of how close his knee is to yours, how warm he feels even from here, how his scent is something minty and expensive and a little too much for your nervous system. He tosses the chip bag into your lap without looking. âHowâd that mock exam go?â You blink. âTheâwhat?â
âMath. You had that calc practice test last month, right?â He glances at you, amused. âYou and Seiko were complaining about it for like a week straight.â You feel yourself short-circuit. âOh. Uh⊠kind of ass?â He laughs, reaching for a chip. âFigures. You always made the dumbest faces doing fractions. Like the paper personally offended you.â You scoff, mostly to hide your dying brain. âWell, maybe if I had a better tutorââ
âExcuse me?â He gasps. âI was the best tutor in a ten-mile radius. Ask Seiko.â
âShe failed.â
âThatâs on her. I saw her bingeing dramas at 3am instead of studying.â
âI HEARD THAT!â Seikoâs voice rings out from upstairs. You all crack up. Even Suguru snorts. And for a moment, itâs perfect. Easy. Like itâs always been this wayâlike nothingâs going to change. But you know it is. Heâs leaving. Heâs going halfway across the world, and this stupid little crush, this years-long secret youâve carried like a favorite book, is going to stay just thatâyours, and only yours. He wonât remember this night. Heâll have new friends, new people. And youâll still be here, sixteen-going-on-seventeen, sitting on the floor of your best friendâs house pretending your heart isnât breaking just from how his knee brushes yours.
Thenâ
âHey,â he says suddenly, quiet, leaning in slightly. You look up, startled. âWhat?â His eyes search your face, like heâs seeing something heâs not used to seeing there. Then he reaches out and tugs lightly on the ends of your hair.
âYouâre growing this out?â Your voice almost fails. âUh⊠yeah?â
âIt looks good,â he says, simple and real, and you can feel your entire bloodstream catch fire. Heâs still watching you. But then the moment breaksâSeiko barrels down the stairs yelling about Suguruâs Instagram story, and everything shifts back into chaos. He turns away, laughing again, and the quiet slips between your fingers like sand. Still. You tuck it away. Into the little folder labeled him.
Because youâll remember this night. He wonât. But you will.
â
ââItâs been three years since that night. The one where your heart skittered up your throat at the sound of his laugh, where heâd tugged the ends of your hair and called it pretty, where heâd looked at you like he saw something there. Or maybe he was just being friendly. You over analyze simple interactions with men a little too much.
Youâd replayed it for weeks. Obsessively, stupidly. Burned it into your mind like it meant something. But time has a way of softening things, even the sharpest crushes. The ache of it dulled as college rolled on, as you kissed boys who werenât him, as you got older and started dressing for yourself instead of wondering if heâd notice. Now, youâre sitting cross-legged in Seikoâs childhood bedroom, half in a blanket cocoon, sipping flat soda out of an old anime cup you both used to fight over when you were twelve. The windowâs open, the curtains swaying with the breeze, and the room smells like spring air and vanilla body mist. âOkay,â Seiko says, her voice muffled as she flops back dramatically onto her pillows, âIâm literally not kidding anymore. If prices of apartments go up by even one more dollar than the current budget Iâm on, Iâm just going to live in the campus library like a cryptid.â
You snort. âYouâd last two nights before you begged for my airfryer and moisturizer.â
âThat is so true,â she groans, throwing a hand over her face. âWaitâwhy donât we just move in together? Like⊠actually. Find a place off-campus. Split the bills. Youâre always here anyway, and you hate your housemates. And I wanna get out of this house already. Like, I need to feel like an adult, statâ You blink at her. âWait, are you serious?â
âDeadass.â
Itâs not a bad idea. You are here all the timeâyour uni ended up being like twenty minutes from Seikoâs family home, and when your dorm got too loud or your brain got too tired, she always had a spare blanket and instant noodles ready for you. Half your stuffâs already in her closet. Living with Seiko wouldnât be hard. Youâve survived sleep-deprived all-nighters, food poisoning, two breakups, and a disastrous eyebrow waxing incident together. An apartment feels like a natural next step. âI mean, yeah,â you say, stretching your legs out on the bed, âIâd be down. But only if I get the good side of the fridge.â
âYou donât even cook!â
âExactly. So I deserve extra space for my stash of thirty minute butter chicken and diet coke.â
âFair point, the thirty minute butterchicken has been one of your greatest finds at the store yet,â she nods solemnly. Itâs easy like this. Girl talk, real talk. The kind that only comes after years of shared notebooks and late-night crying and stupid dances in the hallway. Youâre mid-scroll on your phone, looking up open listings, when Seiko suddenly straightens up with a weird look on her face.
âOh shit.â You glance over. âWhat?â
âI just rememberedâmy mum texted me this morning⊠Satoruâs flight from Japan is today.â You freeze, thumb hovering mid-air. âSeiko.â
âI swear I thought it was next week! But turns out she meant this Sunday, not next.â
âAre you fucking kidding me?â you whisper, heart doing something traitorous in your chest.
She cringes. âSorryyy. Itâs not like heâs crashing in this room. Heâs taking the guest one downstairs.â
âThatâs not the point,â you mutter, flopping back into the pillows like the dramatic main character you are. âI need, like, mental prep. A warning! A buffer zone!â
âItâs been three years,â she reminds you, raising an eyebrow. âYouâre not stillââ
âIâm not.â You cut her off quickly, sitting up. âIâm not. I got over it.â You say it with the conviction of someone who hasânot just because time passed, but because you actually did the emotional legwork. You remember how youâd finally told Seiko about your crush a few months after Satoru had flown out for that scholarship program. It was during a late-night snack runâMelonpan and slurpee in hand, parked outside the 7/11 under shitty yellow streetlights. Your voice had cracked halfway through the confession. âI think I had a thing for your brother,â youâd said, casual in that fake-casual way. âLike, a crush-crush.â And Seiko, bless her heart, didnât freak out or make it weird. She just shrugged and sipped her drink like youâd told her the weather.
âYeah,â sheâd said. âThat was kinda obvious.â
âObvious?â youâd gawked. Sheâd snorted. âYou stared at him like he was a Greek god who worked part-time at Uniqlo. And you got aggressively nice every time he walked into the room.â After that, the dam kind of burst. You ended up telling her everythingâevery humiliating thing youâd done in the name of Satoru Gojo. Like the time you spent twenty minutes curling your eyelashes before a family barbecue, only to blink so aggressively at him that your contact lens folded in half. Or how you once tripped over her cat trying to sprint to the bathroom when you heard his voice in the hallwayâbecause you hadnât shaved your legs and you simply could not be perceived like that. Seiko had listened to it all with a mixture of horror, amusement, and deeply affectionate judgment.
âYouâre disgusting,â sheâd said once, fondly. âBut youâre my disgusting best friend, so I guess I have to love you anyway.â Now, three years later, you smirk a little at the memory. âI was like sixteen,â you say, brushing invisible dust off your shirt. âAnd he was older and cooler and looked good in white t-shirts. It wasnât exactly hard to crush on him.âÂ
Seiko hums. âYou also wore a push-up bra every time you knew heâd be home.â
âDonât slut-shame me for being sixteen and desperate for attention,â you say with a grin.
âYou also practiced putting on eyeliner with a spoon.â
âI hate that you remember everything.â
âYou told me your soul left your body when he looked at your knees once.â
âOkay, now youâre making things up.â
âYou tried to use cherry lip gloss as blush.â
âThat oneâs valid. TikTok taught me that.â Seiko laughs and tosses a pillow at you, and the roomâs full of that deep, cozy joy that only comes when someoneâs known you long enough to remember your awkward era and still wants to live with you. Itâs quiet for a second after that. The breeze flutters in, catching on the posters still stuck to her wallsâold anime prints, boy band photos from your middle school years, a collage of polaroids with all your worst angles and best memories. You sigh and glance at her. âSo⊠what do we do if he actually shows up?â She shrugs. âWe act normal. Weâre adults now. Youâre not gonna combust from seeing his stupid face again.â You both dissolve into uncontrollable laughter again, that warm, stupid haze settling in the room like an old blanketâthe kind woven from late-night confessions and shared snacks, music blasting from your phones, and way too many years of embarrassing stories. And even with all the teasing, the grossed-out big sister act, the ridiculous confessionsâyou know she gets it. Youâre not that girl anymore. Satoru Gojo might be coming back tonight. But youâve grown up. Gotten your heart broken a few times. Learned how to kiss without thinking about someone else's older brother. Youâre not that girl anymore. But you do still kind of hope your eyeliner holds up.
â
The first sign that somethingâs changed is the sound of the door. Not a knockâof course not. Gojo Satoru never knocked in his own house. Itâs the familiar click-clack of the handle Seikoâs parents never replaced, followed by the solid thud of shoes on hardwood and the faint rustle of bags. And then, casually:
âYo! Iâm home!â
Your stomach drops. Seiko, still mid-sip of her Diet Coke, just blinks at you from across the living room. Youâre sitting criss-cross on the rug, wearing a hoodie that may or may not have a bleach stain and socks with cartoon strawberries on them. The TV is paused on some half-watched dating show, and youâre surrounded by empty chip bags and your laptop, still open on a tab labeled apartments near campus cheap please.
ââŠYou said tonight,â you whisper, already scrambling to smooth your hair down. âI thought it was tonight!â Seiko whisper-hisses back. âMom mustâve meant this afternoon!â And before you can gather the scraps of your dignity and disappear up the stairs, heâs already in the room. Gojo Satoru. In the flesh. Three years older. And apparently, bulkier than God intended. He's in a plain black t-shirt and grey sweatpants, and you hate that the first thing you notice is how tight the sleeves are around his biceps. Broad shoulders. Defined chest. Forearms that probably didnât look like that the last time you saw him. Thereâs a duffel slung over one shoulder and a Lawson bag in the other. Sunglasses pushed up into his hair.
He stops short in the doorway when he sees you. âOh,â he says, blinking. âDidnât know you were here.â You go stiff. âYeah. Hey.â Itâs weird. Itâs so weird. You havenât seen him since that summerâsince the night before he left for that international scholarship program. And now heâs standing there like no time has passed, like his shoulders didnât double in size and like your brain isnât short-circuiting from sheer secondhand awkwardness. Satoru looks at Seiko. âYou didnât read my texts again, did you?â
âThey were blurry photos of vending machine sandwiches,â she deadpans. âForgive me for not decoding that.â
He shrugs, dropping his bags to the floor with a loud thump, going over to trap his sister into a bear hug, smirking when she squealed and said something about not being able to breathe. âI said I was coming today.â
âNo, you said, âsoon.ââ
âWell, I meant today.â Thereâs a beat of silence. You try not to look directly at him, as if eye contact will cause some sort of emotional combustion. You can feel how out-of-place you suddenly areâsocks on the wrong foot, posture too stiff, heart hammering in your chest like youâre sixteen again. He looks at you once Seiko has scrambled out of his grip, hands shoved into his pockets. Not weirdly. Just⊠like heâs trying to remember something.Â
âSo howâs college? Seiko keeps me updated on the entire experience, but howâve you been finding it? Big jump from highschool?â He asks, voice casual in that way that somehow makes it worse.
You nod. âYeah. Um, good! Nice, I like it. Fun, even.â He raises his eyebrows slightly, impressed.
 âNice. Whatâs your major?â
âPsych,â you say, then immediately hate how your voice goes just a little too high on the â-ch.â You clear your throat. âPsychology.â He nods again, the way people do when they donât actually know what to say next. âCool. Lots of reading?â
âYeah. Um, way too much.â You try to laugh a little, like a normal person, but it comes out thin. You shift your weight. He shifts his. Somewhere behind you, a fly buzzes. âHow was Japan?â you ask, because someone has to fill the silence before your ears implode from the pressure. He perks up a little, like heâs glad for the safer topic. âIt was good. Really cool. I was in Tokyo for the most part, did this exchange thing with TodaiâTokyo University.â He scratches the back of his neck. âThey had me in this physics program for my undergrad, working with some grad students on quantum optics stuff.â
You blink. âQuantum what now?â He grins, and you hate that it's still the same cocky lopsided thing it was at seventeen. âLasers.â
ââŠOh.â
âYeah,â he says, with a self-deprecating shrug. âMostly just a lot of math and equipment malfunctions. The usual.â You nod, because you have absolutely nothing to add to that, unless your psych notes on Pavlovâs dogs suddenly become relevant to international laser research. The silence creeps back in, loud as ever. âCool,â you say, again. Your default setting, apparently. He nods. âYeah.âÂ
You both just stand there for a second too long, not quite looking at each other. Thenâ
âWow, this isnât awkward at all,â Seiko deadpans as she looks between you both, sipping her drink with all the grace of a sitcom character arriving to save a scene. You both instinctively reply, âShut up,â in unison. Which only makes it so much worse.
Seiko just raises an eyebrow at you like youâre the one being weird, and mutters something about grabbing a snack before disappearing into the kitchen again. And then itâs just you and Satoru again. Standing in the middle of the living room. A full foot apart but worlds away. He shifts his weight, glancing around like heâs re-familiarizing himself with the space. The rug. The shelves. The old family photos that havenât moved in years.Itâs weird seeing him here again. Weirder seeing him like this. Older. Bigger. Built like heâs been bench pressing trucks for fun. His hair is a little longer now, swept back lazily, an undercut visible, and his whole presence feels heavierânot in a bad way. Just more⊠there. Same face. Same dumb grin. But it doesnât feel like the same person anymore. And god, this is awkward. He clears his throat. âWell. Iâm gonna shower.â
âCool,â you say, like a robot malfunctioning. And trying not to imagine him naked. In the shower. Water running down his built body. He grabs his bag again, nods, and heads upstairs. Only when heâs gone do you let your whole body collapse back into the couch. Seiko reappears two seconds later with a bowl of cereal. You groan into your hands.
 âWhat the hell was that.â
She chews. âThat was my brother. Looking like a protein powder ad.â
âOh my god, youâre right. Did I act up?â
âYou said âcool.â Like someoneâs dad.â You scowl. âOkay, well you forgot to mention he turned into a brick wall with legs.â
âGross. Thatâs my brother.â
âYouâre the one who said protein powder!â
âYeah, and you looked like you were going to pass out just from seeing his arms.â You huff, closing your laptop screen with a huff.
âShut up.â
â
Itâs the week before uni starts again. The tail end of your well-earned university breakâhalf spent in your disaster of an apartment with even more disastrous flatmates (you genuinely canât even get into how bad it is without spiraling), and half in the cozy, warm bubble of your best friend Seikoâs family home. You still donât know why she ever wants to move out of here. The fridge is always full, the floors are always clean, her parents adore you, and the water pressure in the upstairs bathroom makes you want to marry the plumbing. But there is one caveat to all this domestic bliss. Being in the house of your gorgeous, lovely best friend means now constantly being around her equally gorgeous, equally lovely older brother. Now, to be fair, you said you were over it. The crush. The obsession. The years-long pining that began in childhood and ended somewhere between your first college situationship and your second real heartbreak. Itâs been three years since he left for Japan. Three years since you confessed the whole dumb thing to Seikoâwho just blinked at you and said, âYeah? It was so obvious.â Three years since you mentally filed away every mortifying thing youâd ever done in the name of impressing Satoru Gojo.
(âRemember when you wore that way-too-small bra and couldnât breathe the whole day?â Seiko had giggled. âOr when you put on lipgloss just to ask him what time it was?â âShut up,â you groaned, face down in her bed. âNo, you shut up,â sheâd laughed. âItâs endearing.â)
And it was fine. You were fine. You got older. You had experiences. You werenât that girl anymore. But youâre also just a girl. A really hormonal, 20-year-old girl. With eyes. And a pulse. And a deeply cursed memory of the way he used to ruffle your hair like you were some scrappy little sister. So yeah. Itâs complicated. Satoru Gojo has been back from Japan for a few weeks nowâand oh boy, had he made his presence known. The living room and his upstairs bedroom have basically become dual command centers of chaos, filled with overlapping noise and endless energy. Heâs constantly switching between the two, dragging Suguru along for the rideâalso freshly returned and, much to Seikoâs unspoken delight, always over. Thereâs laughter echoing from the TV, loud cackling over dumb reels, or occasional testosterone-fueled howling whenever theyâre deep in some Fortnite deathmatch or FIFA playoff. Sometimes you walk into the kitchen and thereâs a stranger raiding the fridge. Sometimes you step into the hallway and trip over Satoruâs gym bag, which weighs more than your trauma. And godâheâs jacked now. Not like, oh he works out sometimes jacked. More like, I could throw a car if I wanted to jacked. Broad shoulders. Arms that stretch his t-shirts in unfair ways. Thighs that should be illegal in those loose basketball shorts. You hate that youâve noticed. You hate that you still kind of care.
Youâre coping. Barely. One afternoon, youâre sprawled on the living room couch with Seiko, sharing a packet of sour gummies and flipping between bad reality TV shows when the front door bangs open. âBack from war,â Suguru announces, tossing his keys on the entry table like he owns the place. âWe got slushies,â Satoru says, trailing behind him, arms full of way too many drinks. âSomeone help, I canât feel my fingers.â
âOh my god, whyâd you get six?â Seiko says, hopping up.Â
âThey had a buy-three-get-three deal,â he shrugs. âMath, baby.â You linger behind her, offering a casual wave as Satoru spots you. He nods back, all easy smiles and post-gym glow, looking annoyingly good in a dark tank and sweats. His hairâs messier than usual, like he towel-dried it in the car and gave up halfway through. The four of you end up lounging in the living room, Suguru and Satoru on the floor, you and Seiko curled up on the couch. Suguruâs the first to start shit. âRemember when you two used to pretend to be spies and sneak snacks from the kitchen?â he grins, pointing at you and Seiko. âThat was your idea,â Seiko fires back. âYeah, but you were the one who tried to crawl under the dining table and got stuck between the legs of a chair.â Youâre halfway through a laugh when Satoru adds, âShe cried for ten minutes. Thought she was gonna die under there.â
âShut up, you dick,â Seiko says, throwing a gummy at him. He snorts, catching it effortlessly. âI saved you. That makes me a hero.â
âShe only cried âcause you told her cockroaches resided in the legs of that chair and they were gonna crawl all over her,â you say with a giggle. Satoru turns to you, mock offended. âI was building childhood resilience.â You all laugh again, the energy light and familiar and buzzing. But thenâ
Suguru smirks. âHonestly, the way you two used to follow him around like ducklingsââ
âI did not,â you start, horrified.
âSure,â Satoru grins, easy and warm. âYou were like a little sister. Like I had two little sisters.â
Your heart doesnât shatter or anything. Youâre not a teenager anymore. But something still winces inside you. A slow, dull ache. Not because you wanted him to say something elseâbut because that confirms it. All the years of wondering, of analyzing every glance or moment, just shrinks down into a single, harmless label.
Like a little sister.
You catch Seikoâs eye for a second. She doesnât say anything, but you know she saw the exact second your expression faltered. Back upstairs later, youâre sprawled on her bed again, half scrolling your phone, half dissociating into the pattern on her ceiling. âHey,â she says softly, nudging you with her toe.
You blink. âWhat?â She winces, dramatic. âI am so sorry. If the guy I liked said that about me I would simply pass away.â You groan into her blanket. âSeiko, stop.â
âNo likeâwhyâs he so dumb? He didnât mean it like that, I swearâhe just says the first thing that pops into his head sometimes, you know how he isââ
âI donât like him anymore,â you say firmly, sitting up. âSeriously. Itâs not that deep.â But your younger self stings a little. Because now you know. Itâs all been filed neatly into kid stuff. Little sister things. Nothing that ever reached him the way it reached you. Youâre not hurt. Youâre just⊠grounded. Suddenly and irrevocably grounded. Seiko flops next to you, throwing an arm over her eyes. âHeâs an idiot. A weird, gym-rat, physics-nerd idiot. Weirdo. Total weirdo.â
You snort. âThatâs a lot of hyphens.â
âHe deserves them.â
â
The first week of uni starts with a heatwave. Everything feels sticky. Pavement melting under your shoes, tote bags sticking to your shoulder, the air around campus thick and weirdly scented with iced coffee and sunscreen and overpriced cologne. Your phone keeps warning you about the UV index. Every lecture hall feels either suffocating or like a freezer on full blast. It's a miracle you haven't already dropped out. Life feels like it's slipping back into placeâuntil it doesn't. Because now Satoru Gojo is here. At your university. I mean, obviously, he was bound to. Something about an honours year. You knew it was coming. Youâd heard Seiko mention it offhandedly over break. âHe transferred in with Suguru, their credits aligned or whatever, I donât know. Something about physics andâoh my god, are you listening?â
Youâd nodded, but your stomach had dipped. And now heâs just⊠here. It starts small. A glimpse in the courtyard during the week. Youâre sitting cross-legged under a shady tree with your friends when you hear someone laugh loud and obnoxiously behind you. You turn. Heâs leaning against a bench, sunglasses perched on his head, grinning while talking to some third-years like heâs known them forever. His presence is so big. Heâs always taken up spaceâbut now it feels more deliberate. Like he knows it. Like he expects it. You donât wave. He doesnât see you. That should be the end of it. But then it happens again. In the campus gym, where youâre trying to kill time on a treadmill before your next tutorial, and he walks by, all sweat and tank top and biceps that really need to calm down. Heâs fist-bumping the guy at the front desk. Later, you hear one of the girls in your class whisper, âThatâs Gojo Satoru, right? The hottie in that physics thing in Japan?â
Of course he was. It becomes a pattern. You donât even need to look for himâhe just keeps showing up. In the science wing, at the club fair where he somehow ends up manning the booth for the rock climbing society and the anime club. Heâs basically an unofficial campus ambassador by week two. People know him. Your university, for all its massive sprawl and fancy name, is crawling with alumni from your high school. Itâs like a silent, unspoken networkâpeople recognize each other, even if they donât acknowledge it. It means Satoru doesnât have to try that hard. The guys already like him. The girlsâwell. You hear his name a lot. For obvious reasons. Floating through stairwells. Written in notebooks with dumb little hearts. There are rumors, already, that heâs seeing someone from the bio department.
You tell yourself you donât care. And for the most partâyou really donât. Your classes are packed. Your workloadâs heavy. Youâre constantly flitting from the library to lectures to the cafĂ© where you work weekends, barely keeping your head above water. And still, sometimes, in the middle of it allâyouâll catch him across campus. Headphones in. Laughing with Suguru. Buying a stupid energy drink at the vending machine by the student union. Sometimes you think he catches you too. But you never talk. You see Seiko more often. Sheâs in a few overlapping courses with you, and sometimes you sit together on the lawn between lectures, splitting snacks, complaining about professors. She doesnât bring up her brother unless you do. You never do.Â
âDid you get that neuro reading done?â she asks one day. You nod, eyes flicking past herâto the quad where Gojoâs tossing a football lazily with Suguru and some guy from your econ lecture. Seiko follows your gaze, then groans, muttering, âGod. He really is everywhere.â You snort. âHeâs like a university cryptid.â
âDonât give him that power.âÂ
You smile. But your fingers twist in your lap. You donât say it, but part of you feels itâlike youâre in the wrong timeline. Like youâre living in the aftermath of a story that never got its ending. Heâs so comfortable here. Like heâs always belonged. Meanwhile, youâre still figuring out how to breathe around the memory of a crush you swore you let go. The closest you get to speaking is when youâre leaving your psych lecture one afternoon, earbuds in, digging for your sunglasses. You bump into someoneâs arm and look upâand itâs him. He blinks. Then flashes you that old, toothy grin. âOh. Hey.â You freeze, smile stiff. âHey.â
He opens his mouth, like he might say something elseâbut then someone calls his name from behind, and he glances over his shoulder. âCatch you later, yeah?â You nod, and heâs gone. Itâs stupid. So stupid. You shouldn't feel anything about a moment that small. But it stays with you, hours later. The heat of the hallway. The faint smell of his cologne. The way your voice felt weird in your own throat. You walk to your next class and pretend your heart isnât fluttering like it used to when you were fifteen. Youâre older now. Youâre different. But maybe some things still live under your skin, soft and stupid and waiting.
Itâs a Wednesday afternoon when Seiko texts you last minute asking if you can drop off the notes from your shared class.
canât believe I forgot my entire folder at yours pls drop it off if u can iâll owe u one xoxo
You type out a âdumbass hoâ and stuff the folder into your tote bag. Itâs not a big deal. Her house is barely a fifteen-minute walk from campus, and besidesâher mum usually answers the door and immediately offers you snacks, which is always a win. What you donât expect is for the door to open and reveal him.
Satoru. Heâs in a black t-shirt and grey sweats, his hair a little messy, like he ran a hand through it one too many times. Thereâs a faint shine to his skin, maybe from a workout, and heâs holding a water bottle like he was in the middle of something when the doorbell rang. âHey,â he says. Just that. A flat, casual hey. Like he wasnât someone who used to give you heart palpitations for fun. You blink, pulse suddenly louder in your ears than it has any right to be. âUhâhi. I brought Seikoâs notes.â He nods and steps aside, letting you in. Youâre immediately hit with the familiar scent of the house: something citrusy and comforting, and now⊠faintly laced with deodorant and aftershave. âSheâs out,â he says, shutting the door behind you. âWent to grab some stuff from the store. She should be back soon.â You clutch the folder like itâs a lifeline. âOh. Cool. I can just leave these in her room or something.â
He shrugs, walks past you, heading toward the kitchen. âYou can wait if you want. She said she wouldnât be long.â You follow hesitantly, standing awkwardly near the dining table while he grabs a glass and fills it with water. Thereâs a quiet tension hanging in the air. Not heavy, not hostileâjust⊠weird. Like youâre both aware of the fact that you used to be on casual, even teasing terms, but now thereâs too much time and space between then and now.Â
âYou want water or something?â he offers, without looking. You shake your head. âNo, Iâm good. Thanks.â He leans against the counter, takes a slow sip. The silence settles again, this odd in-between where neither of you knows how to talk like normal people. Then, he glances at you, eyes flicking briefly from head to toe. âYou used to be shorter.â You blink. ââŠExcuse me?â
âI mean, youâre still short,â he adds, lips twitching slightly. âJust. Less so.â You stare at him, genuinely unsure how to respond. Itâs not an insult, exactly, but it also feels like a trap. If you protest too much, itâs pick-me behavior. If you act like you donât care, itâs awkward. If you joke back, does that make it banter? Are we⊠bantering? You end up huffing out a weird little half-laugh, scratching your arm. âCool. Glad my growth spurt was almost imperceptible.â He actually chuckles at that, a small sound that catches you off guard. âDidnât say it wasnât appreciated. Youâre likeâwhat? An inch taller?â
âTwo and a half inches more,â you correct, instinctively defensive.
âThatâs generous.â
 You roll your eyes and plop your tote bag down onto the chair, trying to play it cool despite the heat in your cheeks. âGlad to know the years havenât dulled your talent for stating obvious facts.â He grins, and for a secondâjust a secondâit feels almost normal again. But then it dips back into silence, and you both shift awkwardly in the space. He drinks more water. You pick at the strap of your bag. âSo,â he says eventually, voice mild. âYouâre studying psych, right?â You nod. âYeah.â He nods back. âThatâs cool. You like it?â You pause, debating how honest to be. âItâs⊠interesting. Not as glam as people think it is. A lot of research. Stats. Trying not to spiral about your own life because of 2000 word essays in the middle of cognitive lectures.â That earns you another short laugh. âSounds about right.â
You look up at him, heart thudding in a weird rhythm. âWhat about you? Japan looked cool from the stuff you posted.â He shrugs, but thereâs something almost sheepish about it. âIt was good. Managed to complete my undergrad, thankfully. Lot of weird hours. Labs. Professors that hated when I was late. Which was often.â You smile, despite yourself. âShocker.â
âI know. Me? Unpunctual?â He gives a mock gasp. The words settle in the air, kind of dumb and lightâbut they cut through the awkward tension just enough that something unspoken slips into place. Like, okay. This isnât the same as before. But itâs not totally broken, either. Still, youâre hyperaware of every breath, every glance. This close to him, itâs impossible not to notice the slight sheen on his arms, the veins on his forearms, the fact that the Gojo Satoru who once teased you about having mismatched socks is now built like a Marvel superhero who occasionally gets mistaken for a Greek statue. Heâs being nice. Not in a flirtatious way. Not in a performative way. Just⊠like a person. A guy who knows you used to be closer, but isnât sure how to bridge the gap. A guy who probably doesnât know you once practiced your signature with his last name in the margins of your math notebook
The front door creaks then, and you both turn as Seiko walks in carrying two tote bags. You both glance at each other, then away, and Seiko bursts into laughter. âGod, you both are so weird. I hate it.â You shoot her a look. âYouâre the one who made me come over because you forgot your notes.â
âOkay, but I had a lot on my mind,â she says airily, waving you off as she kicks off her shoes.
âYou left a folder the size of a small child on my kitchen table.â
âI was in a rush!â
âDoing what? Lying horizontally on my floor and watching edits of Business Proposal?â
She gasps. âThat was for my mental health. You know how much better I feel after seeing Ahn Hyo-seop.â Satoru, still leaning in the doorway with his water bottle, snorts. âNah, sheâs been like this forever. Youâre braver than I am for entertaining her.â You blink, caught slightly off guard, and glance at him. Thereâs the faintest grin playing on his lips, like heâs enjoying this a little too much. Seiko glares at him. âExcuse me? Who asked you?â
âIâm just saying,â he says, casual and maddeningly smug, âif she forgot a folder, you know itâs probably still under a pile of her clothes or shoved between couch cushions or something. Classic Seiko behavior.â You canât help itâyou snort, loud and involuntary, and cover your mouth with your hand. âThatâs actually so true.â
âTraitor!â Seiko gasps, swatting your shoulder. âYouâre supposed to be on my side!â
âOh no,â Satoru says, mock-serious, âsheâs right to switch teams. Youâve been doing this since elementary school. Remember when you swore you didnât lose that permission slip and it turned out youâd used it to doodle hearts all over?â
âTHAT WAS ONE TIME,â she cries, dramatically throwing her hands in the air.
âYou drew Suguru in a wedding veil,â he adds helpfully. Youâre laughing now, a real laugh, the kind that warms your cheeks and loosens your spine. Thereâs something stupidly delightful about the fact that heâs joking with you. Siding with you. Even if itâs at Seikoâs expense. Even if itâs meaningless. But still. A twinge. A fluttery, ridiculous little swell of something in your chest that you stamp down before it can fully form.Â
âOh my god, I actually hate you both,â Seiko mutters, dragging you toward the stairs by your wrist.
âYou love us,â Satoru calls after you.
âNo, I tolerate you,â she calls back.
âSame difference.âÂ
You glance back one more time at him before Seiko hauls you up the stairs. Heâs leaning against the bannister now, looking amused, eyes flicking briefly to meet yoursâand for a moment, itâs not awkward or distant. Itâs just⊠kind of nice. Then youâre being pulled into Seikoâs bedroom, and the door shuts behind you, cutting off whatever weird, fluttery feeling had started to creep up your spine.
â
"I swear," Seiko groans, shutting her laptop dramatically and tossing it onto the floor. "If I have to look at one more studio apartment listed as a âcozy urban oasis,â I'm gonna cry." You snort, lying on your back and tossing a scrunchie at her head. "Maybe we should just live in a van. Free rent. Adventure. Character building."
"Shut up," she says, batting the scrunchie away. "You're too high maintenance to live in a van." You gasp, putting a hand to your chest. "Excuse me?"
She grins wickedly. "You need, like, twelve skincare products and two duvets to function."
"Thatâs just basic self-care," you argue, sitting up on your elbows. "Youâre the one who needs complete silence and two white noise machines to sleep."
You open your mouth to throw another insult when the door creaks open without a knock, and in strolls Satoru, looking wholly unbothered, as usual. Heâs wearing grey sweats and a black hoodie, sleeves shoved up to his elbows. His hair is messier than usual, like he just woke up from a nap or something. You really wish you didnât notice how broad he looks now, or how easily he takes up the space when he steps in like he owns the place.
"Hey," he says casually, rifling through the desk drawers without really explaining himself. "Either of you seen my charger?" Seiko doesnât even glance at him. "Which one?"
"The black one with the weird fray at the end. It's hanging on by a thread but it's my favorite." You shrug from the bed. "Haven't seen it." He makes a noncommittal sound and keeps searching. Seiko sighs dramatically, flopping onto her back. "God, I hate apartment hunting. It's literally the worst thing ever."
"Itâs really not that bad," you say mildly.
"You're just zen because you donât have to live with your parents and have them coddle you about coming home at 8pm," she snaps playfully. Youâre about to argue when Satoru straightens up, tossing something on her deskâsome random cable thatâs not his chargerâand says offhandedly, "I've got a friend whoâs trying to lease out his place near the uni." Both your heads snap toward him.
"What," Seiko says, sitting up fast. He leans lazily against the doorframe, arms crossed, like he didnât just drop a nuclear bomb on your conversation. "Yeah. It's a big three-bedroom. Nice kitchen, close to campus. Think heâs desperate to find people soon." You and Seiko exchange wide-eyed glances.
"Wait, close to campus?" she says, voice climbing in excitement. "That's exactly what weâve been looking for!" Satoru shrugs. "I can text him. Tell him youâre interested." Seiko practically bounces in place. "Yes, yes, please. Tell him! Oh my god, you're a lifesaver." Satoru smirks a little. "Youâre welcome. Bow down to me later."
You roll your eyes. "Donât give him more of an ego, Seiko."
"I canât help it," she says sweetly. "Heâs doing the bare minimum and yet it feels like a miracle." Satoru scoffs, shoving his hands in his pockets. "Youâre lucky I even mentioned it. I couldâve just let you two suffer and die in a moldy shoebox."
"You're such a hero," you say dryly.
"Finally, some respect," he says, flashing you a winkâso casual you almost convince yourself you imagined it. Seiko claps her hands together. "Okay, okay, when can we see it?"
"Iâll text him now," Satoru says, pushing off the doorframe. Heâs halfway into the hall before he calls over his shoulder, "Also, Iâm charging a finderâs fee." You grab a pillow and throw it at him. It hits the doorframe and flops pathetically to the ground. You hear him laughing as he disappears down the hall. Seiko flops back onto the bed with a loud, theatrical sigh. "Holy shit, what if this is actually it?" You grin. "I'd be shocked if Satoru managed to help us not end up in a hellhole."Â
The two of you dive back into excited chatter, tossing around potential decorating plans and screaming every few minutes out of pure relief that maybe, finally, the end of the apartment hunt is in sight.
â
A few days later, youâre sitting shotgun in Satoruâs ridiculously new, ridiculously shiny carâsome black BMW that still smells like leather and money. It purrs like a cat when he taps the gas, and honestly, you're a little scared to breathe too hard in it in case you somehow depreciate its value. "Bro," Seiko says from the backseat, arms spread dramatically across the leather, "this is actually disgusting. Why does your car feel richer than my entire bloodline? And thatâs saying something because I am part of your bloodline."
Satoru just shrugs, flashing a cocky grin as he taps the steering wheel. "Ask Dad. Mid-life crisis purchase. Shit happens when you graduate at the top of your class, Sei." You huff out a laugh, dragging your fingers across the touchscreen console, which looks like it could operate a small spaceship. You donât even want to think about how many zeros were in the price tag. The city buzzes by outside the tinted windows, everything sharp and golden under the late afternoon sun. You watch familiar streets blur past, a little knot of excitement tightening in your chest.
Soon, you think. Soon no more nightmare flatmates. No more coming home to overflowing sinks and strangers passed out on the couch. No more psychotic flatmates who think doing the dishes once a week is a favor to humanity. No more passive-aggressive notes stuck to the bathroom mirror. No more coming home to blaring music and weird smells you don't want to investigate. Just you, your own space, peace. You can almost taste it. Seiko leans forward between the seats, tapping your shoulder. "Dude, we're literally gonna cry when we see it. Manifesting washer-dryer units. Manifesting no mold in the bathroom."
You grin. "Manifesting no one stealing my milk." Satoru snorts. "Your standards are tragic."
"Let us dream, Satoru," Seiko says. He just chuckles, pulling smoothly into the parking lot of a nice-looking building not far from campus. It's clean, modern but not pretentious, with a little courtyard in the middle and wide, sunlit balconies. Way better than anything youâd expected. He swings into a visitor spot and kills the engine. "Alright, my buddyâs inside. He's leasing out the place." You all pile out. Seiko practically skips toward the entrance, phone already out to take pictures, while you hang back a little, taking in the quiet street, the trimmed hedges, the general non-crackhead vibe of the neighborhood. The apartment is on the third floor. When the door swings open, you swear you hear angels singing. Itâs big. Really big. Real hardwood floors. Tall ceilings. Massive windows that flood the space with light. A kitchen that doesn't look like it was last updated during World War II. Three bedrooms, a big open living area, and even a tiny balcony perfect for pretending youâre a functional adult with plants.
You and Seiko spin in place, speechless. "This is...this is so nice," you whisper. Seikoâs already got her phone out, snapping pictures. "Weâre gonna die here. In a good way." Satoru leans casually in the doorway. "Glad you approve." You trail behind Seiko as she bounces around, peeking into bedrooms, mentally decorating hers already. Then, inevitably, the real conversation starts. "So, about rent," Satoru says, scratching the back of his neck. You and Seiko both turn to him warily, like two cats expecting a spray bottle. He names the number.
You feel your stomach lurch. Itâs...more than you were hoping. Not impossible, but definitely more than ramen-once-a-day money. More like maybe-donât-eat-at-all money. Seiko glances at you, and you can see the panic flicker across her face too. But before either of you can spiral, she speaks up quickly:
"It's fine! My parents said they'd cover my share for the first three months," Seiko says, waving her hand like it's no big deal. "Graduation-slash-moving-out present, apparently."
You blink at her. "Seriously?" She nods. "Yeah. They said itâs, like, a 'head start' thing. Theyâre even willing to pitch in a little extra for the whole place while we get settledâyou know, just until we find better jobs and stuff." You stare at her for a second, like sheâs speaking another language. "Wait, so... theyâre covering you, and kind of helping me too?" Seiko shrugs like itâs obvious. "Just a little. Like a safety net. They trust us to take over fully after a couple months." You let out a slow breath you didnât realize you were holding. Three months. Thatâs enough time. Enough time to fix your mess of a resume, beg for more shifts, find somethingâanythingâthat paid decently near campus. Maybe you could finally stop living off sad frozen dumplings and caffeine pills. Seiko grins, reading the relief on your face like itâs printed in bold. "Weâll survive," she declares proudly. "You and me. Broke, but beautiful." You laugh under your breath, some part of your chest unclenching just a little. For once, the future doesnât seem like this endless, terrifying drop-off. Satoru watches the two of you like you're some strange species he's never encountered before. His sunglasses are pushed into his hair, and the way his mouth twitches makes it clear heâs fighting a smile.
"You two are so dramatic," he says, shaking his head. "Youâre literally way worse. You threw a tantrum when you found out dad was only paying your rent for only six months," Seiko fires back immediately. "That wasnât a tantrum, dad promised me two years of rent." Satoru corrects dryly, but the embarrassed glint in his eye makes you glance away to make him feel less embarrassed, smiling helplessly. Rich people and their problems. Itâs stupid, really, how something as small as thatâhim standing there, joking like itâs normal, like youâre all still those dumb kids from the neighborhoodâmakes you feel a little lighter.
â
The day you move in feels half like the best day of your life, and half like you're dying of exhaustion. The morning is a mess of cardboard, duct tape, and terrible weatherâhot, sticky, humid. Sweat drips down your back even though youâre barely halfway through loading the cars. Seikoâs parents showed up for a little bit to help, cooing over their baby girl finally moving out, but they eventually left after a teary goodbye (on Mrs. Gojoâs part) and about thirty different "don't forget to eat real food" speeches.
Now itâs just you, Seiko, and Satoru. Satoru, who pulled up in his shiny Lexus and practically leapt out in gym shorts and a loose black t-shirt, looking like an actual paid model for casual athleticism. You tell yourself you donât notice.
(You absolutely do.)
Your crappy old car is packed to the brim, and the front yard is scattered with the overflowâboxes stacked on the grass, a battered mini fridge, a whole pile of miscellaneous IKEA furniture Seiko impulsively bought off Facebook Marketplace. You and Seiko buzz with nervous excitement, running on adrenaline and bad convenience store coffee, practically vibrating as you unload your lives onto the pavement. "This is so real," Seiko keeps saying every five minutes, grinning like she's won the lottery. "Weâre actually doing it!"
You grin back, feeling it tooâthat breathless, giddy thrill of something new beginning. Something thatâs yours. But then reality slaps you in the face in the form of a very heavy box. You crouch next to it, trying to psych yourself up. Itâs your kitchen stuffâor, at least, you think it is. Itâs all starting to blur together at this point. You steel yourself, grip the bottomâand immediately regret everything. The thing doesnât budge. You grunt, trying to shift it with your knee, and that's when you hear it:
A low chuckle behind you. "Need a hand?" Satoru drawls, sounding far too entertained. You whip your head around, heat rushing to your face. "I'm fine," you lie, through gritted teeth, already feeling your muscles screaming in protest. Satoru doesnât even argue. He just strolls over, leans down, andâ
Lifts it. Like itâs nothing. Like it weighs less than your backpack. You stare, mouth slightly open, as he straightens up effortlessly, cradling the box under one toned arm like itâs a loaf of bread. Jesus Christ. You hate yourself, genuinely, for how visceral your reaction is. Your brain short-circuits for a good three secondsâbecause what the hell, why is seeing a man carry heavy things so biologically attractive? Itâs purely instinct, you tell yourself fiercely. Caveman brain. Biology. Nothing more. You absolutely, categorically, do not have a crush on Satoru Gojo.
(Not anymore.)
You huff out a noiseâmaybe a laugh, maybe a noise of despair, youâre not even sureâand scramble to grab a lighter box to follow him up the driveway. Inside, the apartment smells like fresh paint and possibility. The living room is bright, sun streaming through the wide windows, casting everything in a gold glow. The walls are still a little bare, and the kitchen is empty except for a lonely-looking microwave on the counter, but it already feels like itâs waiting for you. You and Seiko move like hyperactive squirrels, flitting from room to room, deciding what goes where, squealing when you realize your rooms have actual closets, screaming a little when you realize thereâs a working dishwasher. Satoru mostly hangs back, ferrying the heavier stuff inside with annoying ease. You catch him watching once or twiceâan amused, almost fond look in his eyeâbut every time you glance over, he just rolls his eyes like heâs too cool to care.
"Where do you want this?" he asks at one point, gesturing with a huge box labeled MISC (HELP) in your handwriting. "Uhâliving room," you say, already bent over digging through another box. You donât even look up. You also donât notice the way the pretty cerulean hues track over your bent over form.
"Say please."
You whip your head up, scandalized. Seiko cackles from somewhere inside her room. "Youâre enabling him," she calls out. Satoru smirks. "Mm, Iâve been lifting heavy all morning. Some manners would be appreciated, sweets." You toss a crumpled piece of newspaper at him without thinking, and he bats it out of the air easily, laughing under his breath.
Itâs easy, you realize, surprising yourself. Awkward in the way all transitions are, but... easy. You catch yourself smiling more than you mean to. Feeling lighter, younger, almost stupidly happy. Maybe itâs the air of fresh starts. Maybe itâs just the high of freedom. You sigh, dragging the back of your wrist across your forehead, feeling the sweat stick and smear there. For a second, you swear youâre starring in one of those hopecore reels you always save at 2AMâthe ones with strangers helping each other move houses, saving stray cats, planting flowers in busted city sidewalks. Wow. What an awesome life. You almost want to cry out of pure cinematic triumph.
"Alright," Satoru says, clapping his hands together once. "You think you two can handle the rest by yourselves? I promised Suguru Iâd try out this new steakhouse thing with him." Seiko pops her head out from whatever random corner of the apartment she was currently fussing over, a suspicious-looking candle in her hand. She pins him with a look so unimpressed you almost snort. "Satoru," she says, voice flat, "your baby sister is moving into her first apartment and you have Suguru on your mind? Seriously? Sometimes I think you might actually have a thing for him." She shakes her head dramatically, huffing as she plops the candle down onto the kitchen counter and grabs a small tote full of your combined toiletries, marching off toward the bathroom to arrange your skincare armies in synchronized little rows. Satoru snorts, a crooked smirk tugging at his mouth. "Suguruâs hot," he mumbles, like it's just a random fun fact, "but heâs really not my type." You and Seiko roll your eyes in almost perfect sync.
"You're so weird," Seiko calls from the bathroom. "Beyond weird," you agree dryly, hoisting another box onto the counter and stretching your sore arms out in front of you with a wince. "Whatever," Satoru says breezily, scrolling through his phone with one thumb. "Youâre just jealous you donât have a Suguru of your own." Seiko pokes her head out again, narrowing her eyes. "Fine, Mr. Expert. What even is your type, huh? You look like youâd go for anyone with a pulse." You snicker into your shoulder, pretending to busy yourself with unpacking a box of mismatched mugs. You donât even have to look up to feel Satoruâs wounded gasp. "First of all," he says, all whiny indignation, "I have standards, thanks." You shoot Seiko a knowing look, mouthing do you? She fights to hold in a laugh.
"Iâm not about to stand here and discuss my love life with my little sister," Satoru adds, dramatically tossing his phone onto the couch like this conversation personally victimized him. He straightens up then, stretching his arms over his head in that lazy, catlike way he always does, a flash of skin peeking between his shirt and shorts. You glance away instinctivelyâbecause you are a normal person who refuses to acknowledge how unfair genetics can beâand focus very hard on peeling the tape off a box. Out of the corner of your eye, you catch itâthe smallest glance he flicks in your direction. Not obvious, not lingering. Barely there. A neutral, casual once-over, like heâs checking the room. And then, in a maddeningly even tone, he says, "Pretty people. Thatâs my type." Seiko groans, dropping a bottle of toner onto the counter with a thud. "You're so superficial," she accuses.
"Am not," Satoru says immediately, grinning like heâs proud of himself anyway. He scoops his phone back up, scrolling lazily, thumb flicking up the screen without real purpose. He glances over at you againâmore obvious this time, flashing you a grin like youâre in on some joke with him. "Obviously personality matters too," he says, like itâs a casual afterthought. "Iâm not trying to date a hot NPC." Seiko snorts. "Freak."
"Heh, best big brother in the world!," Satoru sing-songs. He grins wide enough for his cheeks to dimple, looking so pleased with himself itâs almost comical. Seiko tosses a roll of paper towels at his head. "Get outta here, loverboy. Go on your stupid steak date." "Steak is important to my wellbeing," Satoru says solemnly, catching the roll one-handed. "Iâm a growing boy."
"Youâre hitting thirty soon," Seiko says.
"After likeâ So many years. And Iâm still growing," he insists, already backing toward the door with a shit-eating grin. You shake your head, laughing under your breath as he slips his slides back on and salutes you both lazily. "Iâll be back later to finish lifting all the heavy shit you two canât handle," he calls over his shoulder. "Don't break anything while I'm gone." Seiko flips him off cheerily. "Break your face!" Satoru just laughs and slams the door behind him. The apartment falls into a kind of humming silence. You and Seiko exchange a lookâand then both burst into helpless laughter.
â
So, itâs been three months. You stare into the fridge like it might magically grow a five-course meal if you just look pathetic enough. A lone carton of eggs, a half-empty bottle of hot sauce, two apples that are definitely on their way out, and a single sad yogurt cup blink back at you. You sigh. Deeply. Existentially. Seiko appears beside you, yanking the fridge door wider open like that'll help. She lets out the most dramatic, heartbroken groan you've ever heard.
"Bro," she says, staring into the abyss. "We have nothing." You nudge the yogurt cup with a finger. It jiggles. Threateningly. "I think even the bacteria gave up," you say. Seiko closes the fridge with a thud and slumps dramatically against it. "I'm gonna combust. We had thirty-minute butter chicken twice this week."
"At least it was edible," you mutter.
"At least it was edible," she mocks you under her breath, whipping out her phone and scrolling angrily. After a second, she holds the screen out to you like she's presenting hard evidence. It's a Doordash receipt for forty dollars. For butter chicken. Again. You grimace. "Iâm gonna be paying that off in my next life." Seiko growls under her breath and without another word, speed-dials her brother. You hear the faint ringtone buzzing and thenâ
"What now?" Satoru answers, sounding halfway amused, halfway put-upon. "If you're on your way back from campus, you need to stop by here first," Seiko says, cutting straight to the point. "Emergency." Satoru laughs, but itâs more out of habit than actual amusement. "What, you finally broke the toilet?" You lean closer to the phone. "Worse. Weâre starving."
"Oh my god," he says, deadpan. "I'm serious," Seiko insists. "We have, like, apples and eggs. Thatâs it."
"Protein and fiber, sounds like a win to me."
"Satoru."
He sighs like youâre both his problem children. "Fine, fine. Text me what you want."
"Just food," Seiko says dramatically. "Literally anything. I'm not picky. I would eat wet cardboard right now." You yell, "Preferably not wet cardboard!" in the background. Satoru chuckles under his breath. "Alright, Iâll swing by. Try not to eat each other while Iâm gone." He hangs up without waiting for a goodbye. Seiko flops onto the couch with the weight of a war veteran. "He's our only hope." You slide down next to her, feeling your stomach physically gnawing at itself. "God help us."Â
Twenty minutes later, the front door swings open and Satoru strolls in like heâs just returned from a victorious hunt, two giant plastic bags dangling from his hands. "You guys owe me," he says, kicking the door shut behind him. "We owe you our lives," Seiko says gravely, already diving for the bags. You help him unload: a greasy box of yakisoba, a pepperoni pizza, fried chicken skewers, random sushi rolls, andâbecause of course he wouldâa pack of Hi-Chew candies. "God bless you," you tell him, mouth watering as you tear into a box. "You're welcome," he chirps, dropping onto the couch and slinging an arm across the back like he owns the place. For a few blessed minutes, the apartment is filled with nothing but the sound of wrappers crinkling and food being demolished. Seiko leans back after her second slice of pizza, groaning like she just got hit by a bus. "Rent is killing us," she mumbles around a mouthful of yakisoba. You nod, wiping your fingers on a napkin. "Literally murdering us. I think my bank account cried blood this morning." Satoru raises an eyebrow. "You guys just hit month four, huh?"
"Yup," Seiko says, popping the "p." "Dear parents cut me off like they said they would. I'm officially a broke, independent woman now." You throw your hand up for a high five and she smacks it. "At least you're employed," Satoru says, pointing a fry at you. "Kinda."
"Gee, thanks," you deadpan. He shrugs, shameless. "I'm just saying. Adulting is rough, bro." Seiko pokes at her plate, looking more dramatic by the second. "I don't even have an adulty enough job yet. I just pick up whatever shifts I can. And our rent is like a guillotine over my neck."
"Same," you say. "Except the guillotine is made of student loan bills." Satoru laughs under his breath, head tipping back against the couch. He looks way too relaxed for someone still technically in the trenches of his honours year. You narrow your eyes at him. "You don't seem stressed at all." He shrugs again. "I'm moving soon, actually." You and Seiko both sit up straighter, suspicious. "Moving?" Seiko repeats. "Why?" Satoru rolls a fry between his fingers, like he's thinking about it. "My place sucks. No city view. I'm over it." You resist the urge to roll your eyes. "Thatâs fair." You deadpan, hoping his brain functions enough to realise that he sounds really out of touch with reality right now. "I want something higher up," he says, waving a hand vaguely. Of course the dumbass doesnât pick up on it. "Somewhere with a view, maybe a balcony."
"Must be nice," Seiko grumbles. "Manifesting," Satoru says, flashing her a peace sign. There's a beat of silence, all three of you chewing or sipping sodas, and then Satoru looks up at you two, slow and casual. "You know," he says, tone maddeningly light, "you do have a third bedroom here." You and Seiko glance at each other. Then back at him. Then back at each other again. "Youâre joking," Seiko says flatly. Satoru grins. "Dead serious."
"You wanna move in with us," you say, like you're trying to process it out loud. "I mean," he says, shrugging like itâs the most obvious thing in the world, "cheaper rent for all of us. You two stop struggling. I get outta my hellhole. Win-win." Seiko puts her pizza down, brows furrowed. "You wouldnât be, like... annoyed?"
"By what, living with you guys?" He smirks. "I've tolerated you for twenty years, Seiko. I think I can survive." You lean back, studying him. "You sure? Itâs not just, like, random strangers across the hall. Youâd actually have to live with us." Satoru lifts his arms, draping them across the back of the couch. "Iâm fine with it. Long as I get dibs on one of the bigger bathrooms." Seiko narrows her eyes. "No way, Iâm not sharing the tiny one."
"First come, first serve," Satoru sing-songs. "Thatâs not how the saying works, we were here before you regardless!" Seiko argues. You laugh, shaking your head. "He'll just barge into whatever bathroom he wants anyway."
"Exactly," Satoru says, grinning wide. "Might as well make it official." Another silence stretchesâthis one heavier, but not uncomfortable. You glance around at the cluttered, half-furnished apartment. The cheap couch. The stacked textbooks on the counter. The faint smell of fried chicken hanging in the air. The way Satoru looks sitting here, like he already belongs. You share a look with Seiko. You both nod, tiny and almost at the same time. "Alright," Seiko says, picking her pizza back up. "Youâre in." Satoru cheers under his breath, pumping a fist like he just won something huge. You barely even register the words leaving Seikoâs mouth â Youâre in â before a weird, fluttery rush lights up in your chest.
Living with you. Satoru. Living here. Sharing a space. A bathroom. A kitchen. A couch. Seeing him stomping around in sweats and a compression t-shirt. Probably leaving the fridge door open. Probably pumping weights in the living room (hopefully). Probably existing. Constantly. You could go into an extreme probability crisis right now. Your brain scrambles, short-circuiting at the images itâs pulling out like some deranged PowerPoint presentation. You squash it down instantly, ruthlessly. No. Absolutely not. This is fine. Youâre fine. You donât care that heâs attractive. Thatâs just biology. Itâs science. You're immune. Fortified. Bulletproof. You pick up a slice of pizza and chomp into it aggressively, as if you can physically chew through the ridiculousness in your own head. Across from you, Satoru just lounges back against the couch, already looking way too at home â laughing at something Seiko says, his stupidly pretty profile catching the light. Your stomach does a small, unnecessary somersault. You blame the hunger. And capitalism. And the universe. Anything but yourself.
â
It starts with the sound of his key jangling in the door like itâs always belonged there. Youâre on the couch, legs tucked under you in the same pajama pants youâve worn three nights in a row, when it clicks open and he steps in â arms full of shit. Like, actual shit. Not even boxes. Just random crap. A pair of beat-up Nikes dangling off two fingers, an expensive backpack that looks like itâs been dragged through five years of war, a stupid Luffy pillow slung under one arm, and a tote bag that says Hotter Than Your Ex, Better Than Your Next in neon pink font. Seiko barely blinks. âYou couldnât use a box like a normal person?â Satoru just kicks the door closed with his heel and grins. âWhereâs the fun in that?â Itâs⊠real. This is happening. Satoru Gojo â your best friendâs annoying, stupidly hot older brother â is now your roommate. A fact that has not yet fully sunk in despite your best efforts to emotionally detach. You glance toward the hallway where the third bedroom has been sitting empty. Clean. Neutral. Ready. Itâs his now. Thatâs his room now. And of course, within thirty minutes, heâs already got his crap everywhere. Thereâs a half-unpacked duffel bag in the entryway. A pair of sunglasses you swear youâve seen him wear inside nightclubs sitting on the kitchen counter. An open Red Bull can next to the sink. A hoodie draped over the back of one of the dining chairs like he owns the place. His smell â some ridiculous overpriced cologne mixed with his laundry detergent â is wafting through the apartment like heâs been here for days instead of forty-five minutes. Heâs not even trying to be annoying. Itâs just⊠him. Loud, effortless, omnipresent him. And when he finally dumps himself on the couch next to you, legs sprawled and hair a little tousled from hauling stuff upstairs, he sighs like he just clocked out of work.
âGod,â he mutters, cracking open a soda. âMy old apartment sucked. This placeâs light is so much better. My plants are gonna lose their minds.â You blink. âYou have plants?â
âYeah,â he says, as if itâs obvious. âI have a monstera named Dog. And this succulent Geto gave me but itâs like⊠almost dead, so we donât talk about her.â
ââŠI didnât know you were a plant guy.â He glances at you, smug. âI contain multitudes.â From the hallway, Seiko yells, âYou contain trash. Come get your crap out of the entryway before I put it all in a black garbage bag and throw it off the balcony.â
âLove you too,â he calls back lazily, then looks at you and grins. âSo. Roomies now.â God. Roomies. You donât even know what to do with yourself. Because this isnât some sitcom. Itâs not all fun and awkward hijinks. Itâs the reality of him being around all the time. Late night cereal runs. Passing each other in the kitchen in weird pajamas. Accidentally hearing him sing to himself in the shower. Seeing him shirtless. Probably way too often. And you tell yourself, very seriously, that it means nothing. Itâs all cool. Youâre an adult. You donât care. Youâre not fifteen and hopelessly in love with his dumb pretty face anymore. But when he reaches behind you to grab the remote, warm arm brushing yours, rings clinking against the plastic of the controller, his cologne curling into your brain like smokeâ
Yeah. Youâre not surviving this lease emotionally intact.
There are, undeniably, perks to living with Satoru Gojo. First off, the rent. Youâre paying less now â which is everything. That extra couple hundred a month? Thatâs groceries. Thatâs less existential dread. Thatâs the occasional iced coffee without hating yourself for buying it. Itâs not glamorous â you still have to split utilities and sometimes get a little too creative with how long groceries can stretch â but youâre no longer crying every time your bank app loads. Small victories. But then thereâs also⊠him. Not in a weird way. Not like youâre in love with him again. Youâve made that very clear to yourself. Itâs just that â he exists loudly. Satoruâs presence is hard to ignore. Even when heâs not saying anything, heâs still there. Shirtless half the time because he âruns hotâ (which is just his excuse to wander around looking like a Calvin Klein ad), hair always messy, a faint smell of whatever stupid expensive aftershave heâs wearing that day lingering behind him. You do your best not to look. You donât always succeed. It doesnât help that he goes to the gym at ungodly hours of the morning and comes back looking like something out of a fitness TikTok thirst trap. Hoodie tied around his waist, shirt sticking to his chest, headphones around his neck and a bottle of neon blue liquid in his hand like heâs sponsored by Gatorade. Seiko never comments on it â mostly because sheâs used to him. She grew up with the guy. You did too, technically, but thereâs a big difference between being fifteen and being twenty-one and seeing him towel off sweat in the kitchen while asking if either of you finished the oat milk.
The second major perk? The car. You no longer have to stress about trains or getting soaked in surprise rain while walking to the bus stop. Satoru, as rich kid as ever, insists on driving all three of you to uni every morning. Heâs not even annoying about it â itâs just what he does. One honk, and you and Seiko pile into the passenger and back seat respectively, the AUX already queued up. Itâs stupidly convenient. You didnât realize how much money public transport drained from your budget until you stopped using it. You still keep your bus pass topped up for emergencies, but itâs basically become a backup plan. Now, you just show up to class on time and dry, with Satoru occasionally handing you a leftover donut from his morning coffee run like heâs Godâs gift to women.Â
Which brings you to the third perk: the food. Satoru and Suguru have this thing where they eat out like every second night. Youâre not sure if itâs because they canât cook or if itâs just rich kid indulgence â but either way, you benefit. They always order too much. And they always bring back leftovers. So now, your fridge has a semi-permanent corner filled with half-eaten yakisoba, overpriced vegan cupcakes, gyoza from a food truck that Geto swears is life-changing, and once â a whole tub of cinnamon sugar popcorn from a rooftop cinema they randomly ended up at. Itâs not the healthiest lifestyle, but youâre broke, tired, and too emotionally drained to cook half the time anyway, so you donât complain. You and Seiko split it like war rations. Half a bao bun each. One cold gyoza thatâs microwaved and devoured like itâs gourmet. A shared spoon of caramel pudding.
âLiving the dream,â Seiko says one night, holding a lukewarm slice of truffle pizza like itâs holy communion. âYouâre so dramatic,â Satoru says around a bite of strawberry mochi. You donât answer, mostly because your mouth is full and also because youâre trying to avoid making eye contact with him in that damn grey tank top again. So yeah. Life with Satoru in the apartment is a little chaotic. A little loud. Full of dumb inside jokes and stolen food and last-minute Target runs. Sometimes he sings in the shower. Sometimes he talks to Seiko too loudly while sheâs trying to nap. Sometimes he leaves his socks in the hallway or accidentally takes your phone charger. But heâs a familiar presence. Heâs not unknown, which is the best part of having him in the apartment, and heâs always been a constant in both of your guysâ lives. So it makes everything worth it.
â
The physics wing feels different from the rest of campusâcleaner, somehow quieter, with that sharp antiseptic scent that clings to air-conditioned labs and too many equations floating in the air. Youâve never had much reason to be down here. The last time you stepped foot near this building was maybe during orientation week when you and Seiko were trying to figure out where the vending machines were. Now, a few months into the semester, you stand awkwardly at the glass doors of one of the labs, peering through to where a group of grad students crowd around a table. Thereâs buzzingâlow voices, a light laugh, the sound of a wheely chair screeching slightly as someone scoots back. You spot him instantly. White hair disheveled like heâs been running his hand through it, sleeves rolled up, safety goggles hanging around his neck, leaning slightly over a notebook as he points something out to a guy beside him. God, he looks hot. But like, academically hot. Like the kind of guy you'd see in a random STEM girlâs Pinterest board titled "study aesthetic." You suddenly feel out of place in your hoodie and backpack, clutching your phone like a lifeline. Then someone notices youâof course itâs a girl. Tall, pretty, good skin, expensive earrings, and sheâs nudging Satoru with her elbow and going, âHey, I think one of your fangirls is here.â Your stomach drops. Fangirl? Satoru looks up, squints a little through the glass, then when he sees itâs you, he snorts. âNah,â he says loud enough for you to hear through the cracked-open door. âSisterâs best friend.â You offer a sheepish wave as the door opens a little more. He slides his notebook off the table and steps out into the hallway with you, all casual like he doesnât notice the way youâre trying not to internally combust. âShit,â he says, rubbing the back of his neck. âI completely forgot I was supposed to take you two home today. Whereâs Seiko?âÂ
âGroup project,â you mumble. âTheyâre finishing something up in the studio.â
âRight. Studio kids. Always acting like the world will end if their poster isnât trimmed perfectly.â He waves back toward the lab, calling out, âTell Suguru Iâll text him about the readings. And tell Reina and them Iâll probably be at that party next week if I donât crash out before then.â Someone inside laughs. âWeâll believe it when we see it!âÂ
Satoru rolls his eyes and then turns back to you. Youâve already started walking, and he falls into step beside you. The hallway is narrow, and when he shifts slightly to let a TA pass by, his hand grazes your lower back in that absentminded wayâjust a half-second of touch, but enough to send your brain short-circuiting. You pretend it didnât happen. Youâre fine. This is fine. âYou didnât have to come all the way down here, yâknow,â he says as you both walk. âCouldâve just texted me again.â
âI did,â you say. He pulls out his phone, blinking at the screen. â...Oh. I have like thirty unread messages. Seikoâs been sending TikToks again.â You huff a laugh. âYeah, youâre doomed.â
âI am,â he agrees, letting the door swing open for you as you step outside. The afternoon sun hits both of you, and itâs quieter out here, more open. A weird kind of silence falls between you for a secondânot uncomfortable, but almost charged. Youâre aware of everything. The distant chatter of students. The shift of your backpack against your shoulders. The way heâs walking just a little slower than you now, like heâs letting you lead the way. You canât stop thinking about the fangirl comment. Is he that popular that he has a whole fanclub? Does that kinda shit even happen in universities? This feels too much like a shoujo anime. Or the way he so casually said sisterâs best friend. Like thatâs all youâve ever been. Like itâs that simple. (And it is. You tell yourself it is.) Still, when he nudged you gently toward the passenger side of his car, casually tossing his bag into the backseat, you wonder if that half-second of contact had lingered for him at all.Â
Probably not. You buckle in. He turns on the engine. The ride starts off quiet in the way late afternoons tend to be. The skyâs a mellow kind of gold, filtering in through the windshield, painting warm lines across the dashboard and your knees. The hum of the engine is low, steady, filling the silence with something that doesnât need to be spoken over. Satoru drives like he does everything elseâlazily confident. One hand on the wheel, the other resting against the door, fingers drumming to some rhythm only he hears. Youâre scrolling through your phone half-heartedly, trying not to look obvious about sneaking glances at him. His profile in this lighting is unfair. Hair tousled like heâs been running it through his hands again, jaw a little sharp with the way heâs biting the inside of his cheek. And his arm, the one holding the wheel, flexes just enough with every turn and adjustment to make your brain short-circuit all over again. Not that it matters. Not that youâre thinking about it. Definitely not.
âSo,â he says eventually, tone casual. âDid you end up getting paired with the group of doom or the semi-decent humans for that one communications elective you chose?â You blink, then groan dramatically. âOh, the group of doom, hands down. Iâve basically become the parent. I write things in our doc and then go delete them hours later because no one else is contributing and I donât want to look like Iâm trying too hard.â
âThatâs brutal,â he says, wincing in sympathy. âHonestly, the whole group work concept should be illegal. Like, I didnât sign up to babysit strangers who forgot what Google Drive is.â You snort. âPreaching to the choir.â He taps his fingers along the wheel, turning the car down the side road toward your neighborhood. âWe had this one guy last semester who literally submitted his part of our lab report as a picture of handwritten notes on lined paper. With a Dorito fingerprint on it. I swear to god.â
Your jaw drops. âNo. Youâre lying.â
âI wish I was. Suguru and I sat in a lab for three hours rewriting it while our TA walked around behind us like we were criminals.â
âYou and Suguru sound like the worst combination,â you say, laughing. âToo much brain power. No accountability.â
Satoru smirks. âYou say that like itâs a bad thing.â
âIt is when Iâm struggling to remember what APA formatting is and you two are running a science empire.â
âIâm more of the face of the brand,â he says modestly. âSuguru does the actual work.â The car slips into silence again, this time a little softer. The kind that fills up with quiet comfort. You glance down at your phone again. No new messages from Seiko yet, just a screenshot she sent earlier of some random overpriced candle she found at the campus market, captioned smells good should i get? lmk.
âStill no update from her?â Satoru asks, glancing over.
âNah,â you say. âI think her groupâs holding her hostage.â
âSheâll claw her way out. Probably with a monologue about art and justice.â You giggle, and then you both fall quiet again, but this time it lingers. You glance sideways at him. Heâs driving one-handed again, but heâs leaning a little more now, elbow resting on the window like heâs relaxedâlike you being here isnât strange or unexpected. You shift slightly in your seat, clearing your throat. âThat girl earlier,â you say, not looking at him. âShe called me one of your... fangirls.â
Satoru glances over, caught slightly off guard. âYeah,â he says, then smiles. âSheâs just being annoying. I donât have fangirls.â You raise a brow. âDidnât that one video of you go viral during university orientation and everyone on tiktok was asking which university this was so that they could come here?â
âOkay, correction. I donât claim the fangirls.â You shake your head, smiling despite yourself. âThe Gojo name has power, huh?â
âI mean... I am tall, conventionally attractive, decent at physics, and have a sexy ass car,â he lists off, counting on his fingers with a smirk. âItâs a hard combo to resist.â
You scoff. âYou forgot âhumble.ââ
âOh, right, yeah. And humble,â he adds, laughing. Another beat passes. The street outside blurs with quiet houses and kids walking home from practice, and you almost forget what started this whole train of thought. But then, without thinking, you say it: âIt didnât bother me. The fangirl thing.â He glances at you again, more carefully this time. âGood,â he says after a second, voice softer. âWouldnât want you to think Iâm embarrassed of you hanging around me or anything.â Youâre not sure what to do with that. So instead, you change the subject. âDo we have anything at home to eat?â you ask. âOr should I mentally prepare for a dinner of peanut butter straight out of the jar?â
âI think Seikoâs got some questionable microwave rice and like... a rogue banana,â he says thoughtfully. You groan. âWeâre going to die.â
âIâll stop by the corner place,â he offers. âGrab some katsu curry or yakisoba or something. You like those?âÂ
You nod quickly. âLove them. Bless you.â Satoru grins. âTold you Iâm useful.â He pulls into the parking lot of the hole-in-the-wall place thatâs somehow cheaper than anything on UberEats, and just before he gets out, he pauses and looks over at you again. âYou sure youâre okay with this?â he asks.Â
âWith what?â You ask, looking thoroughly puzzled. He shrugs. âMe. Driving you. Being around. Existing in your apartment. I understand if itâs like weird with your best friendâs older brother just being around you all the timeââ
You blink. âYou live with us now, Satoru. Itâs a little late to ask if itâs okay.â He laughs and opens the door, stepping out. âFair enough.â You watch him disappear into the little restaurant, humming to yourself and feeling... weirdly calm. (But your chest feels warm anyway.)
â
The takeout bags rustle as Satoru unlocks the apartment door (somehow) with his elbow, a practiced motion at this point. Youâve each got one in your hands, plastic warming your palms through the handles, the smell of fried noodles and katsu curry already seeping through like sweet, spicy comfort. The elevator ride up had been quietâat least in the way that being near him always hums with an odd undercurrent. Satoru had been scrolling on his phone, probably checking something stupid Suguru sent him, when his arm nudged against your shoulder. Not aggressive, just a bump. But it lingered for a second too long, a lazy sway of his weight into yours, like he forgot you were shorter, smallerâmore affected by that kind of touch than he was. You hadnât said anything. Just swallowed it and stared ahead at the doors like your reflection in the brushed steel held the answers. Now, stepping into the apartment, itâs dark except for the thin line of city light pouring through the blinds and cutting across the floor. You toe your shoes off while he moves to the counter and drops the food with a sigh. âI swear this bag's leaking teriyaki oil all over my hand,â he mutters. Youâre still standing there by the door, holding your bag like itâs something delicate, looking at the room a little longer than necessary. Itâs quiet. Seikoâs still not back. The hum of the fridge is the only sound besides Satoru rustling through a drawer. And suddenly, for no reason at all, you think:
What if it was just us? The apartment feels different like this. Dim and soft. You can picture it so clearlyâhim coming home later than you do, shrugging out of his hoodie and tossing his keys on the counter, looking exhausted but smug from some lab win, shoes half on, hair wind-swept and eyes heavy with it. You imagine asking him how his day was, and heâd just lean back against the wall and say something dumb like âmiss me?â before smirking and stealing food off your plate. You picture him walking past you in a towel after a showerâwet hair dripping onto his shoulders, water glistening down his chest, or maybe you both could shower together, or maybe heâd be the type to bend you over every piece of furniture in the houseâand you have to blink, hard, because now youâve accidentally spiraled into something bordering on indecent and youâre still holding katsu curry in a dim kitchen while heâs three feet away. Jesus Christ. You set the food down quickly, trying to physically shake the thought away as you move toward the cabinets. âPlates?â you ask, clearing your throat. âTop left,â he answers without looking up, still fiddling with sauce packets like theyâre puzzle pieces. You reach up to the shelf, stretching on your toes a little. The cabinet is just barely out of reach, your fingers grazing the edge of a plate but not able to actually grab one. You mutter a quiet, annoyed âfuckâs sakeâ under your breath, just as the warmth of a body steps up behind you. You donât even have time to turn.
Thereâs a snicker by your ear. âNeed help, sweets?â You hate that your entire body reacts before your brain does. His chest brushes your back as he casually reaches around you, arm flexing as he grabs the stack of plates with ease. His hips press lightlyâtoo lightly to be on purpose but too present to be ignoredâinto your ass as he leans in. Just a half-second of his weight against yours and your whole bloodstream short-circuits. Heâs so close. So casually, blissfully unaware of how much youâre spiraling again. âGot it,â he says, voice smooth with amusement. âThanks,â you manage to squeak, completely not like yourself. He places the plates down on the counter with one hand and then leans forward just slightly so he can look at you over your shoulder. âYou good?â he asks, smiling a little too knowingly. âFine,â you say quickly. âTotally fine.â You take one of the plates and focus very hard on opening the takeout boxes like your life depends on it, even though your pulse is doing jumping jacks and your head is screaming get it together. He just hums behind you, like heâs not noticing the complete inner meltdown happening a foot away, and grabs two chopsticks and a fork from the drawer. âSeiko said sheâll be home in like twenty,â he says casually, scrolling through his phone again and settling into one of the bar stools. âGroup finally let her escape.â
You nod, handing him one of the boxes. He smiles and takes it, eyes on the screen, and says around a bite of yakisoba, âIf you want more curry than rice just take mine. I like it drowned.â You stare at him for a secondâjust⊠stare. The stupid hair. The lazy voice. The soft lighting that makes the corners of his face look gentle. God. Living with him might actually kill you.Â
â
Itâs barely noon and the apartment is quiet in a way it rarely ever is. Seiko had texted something along the lines of âkill me Iâm gonna be stuck in this library group hell all day,â and Satoru, as usual, was off somewhereâhe mentioned errands, maybe gym, maybe campus, maybe both. You hadnât really been listening when he said it over his coffee that morning, still half-asleep and trying not to drool on the kitchen counter. So now, for the first time in a while, youâre completely alone. No blasting TikToks from Seikoâs room, no loud slams of Satoruâs door because he still hasnât figured out how to close it without shaking the whole apartment. Just you, the faint hum of the fridge, and the unmistakable theme song of Modern Family floating through the living room. You hadnât really bothered with getting readyâweekends were lawless like that. Your hairâs a mess, thereâs a scrunchie abandoned somewhere on the couch, and youâre wearing this soft, too-thin tank top you usually reserve for sleep and your most battered pair of lounge shorts that might as well be pajama bottoms. Honestly, you kind of forgot anyone else existed. You have a blanket pulled over your legs but itâs too hot to fully commit, so itâs half-on, half-off, like youâre being attacked by fabric indecision. Youâre about two minutes into the episode when the front door swings open.
Satoru walks in, keys jingling, sneakers squeaking slightly on the wooden floor. He looks fresh from outsideâhair tousled from the wind, hoodie hanging off one shoulder, plastic bag of snacks in one hand, phone in the other. âOh,â he says, eyes scanning the room. âDidnât think youâd be here.â You sit up straighter, immediately pulling the blanket tighter over your torso like itâs gonna save you from embarrassment. âYeah. I thought you were out all day.â He tows off his shoes lazily, drops his keys on the counter without looking, then tosses the plastic bag down on the coffee table. âI was. Grocery store line was hell. Alsoââ he eyes the TV ââis that Modern Family?â
You blink. âYeah. Why?â
âI love Modern Family.â You arch an eyebrow. âSeriously? I thought you didnât like sitcoms.â
âYeah, but this oneâs special,â he says, flopping onto the couch next to you with no hesitation. âCam and Mitch remind me of me and Suguru.â You snort, trying to subtly tug your tank top higher over your chest. âThatâs unhinged. Which one are you?â He thinks for a second. âI think Iâm Cam.â
You stare. âSatoru, Cam is like⊠dramatic. He cries a lot. I donât think Iâve ever seen you doing that.â
âI have feelings,â he says defensively, grabbing a snack from the bag and opening it one-handed. âYou just donât respect that.â
âMmhm,â you hum, turning back to the TV. You can feel the body heat radiating from his sideâheâs close, way closer than necessary on this big-ass couch. Youâre acutely aware of every inch between you and him. Which is to say, not much. For a few minutes, itâs just the show playing. Comfortable silence. Except your heart is doing this stupid uneven thing because heâs right there. And it doesnât help that at one pointâjust as Phil Dunphy is doing something ridiculousâyou feel his eyes flicker to your side. And for the briefest second, maybe half a second, his gaze dips. You donât move. You donât say anything. His eyes are back on yours almost immediately, lazy grin still on his face like nothing happened. Like he hadnât just (maybe) looked at your chest. Youâre not even sure it was a look. It couldâve been your imagination. It probably was. Right? You suddenly feel ten degrees hotter, curling your toes under the blanket like thatâll ground you. âYou good?â you ask, trying to keep it casual.
âYeah,â he says smoothly. âWhy?âÂ
You shrug, eyes glued to the TV even though youâre not processing a single joke anymore. âYou looked like you were spacing out.â He leans back on the couch like he owns the damn thing, all sprawled out with one arm tossed lazily over the backrest. His fingers dangle behind you, brushing the edge of your shoulder. Barely. But enough to make you hyper-aware of every exposed inch of your skin. You shift a little in your seat. It doesnât help. His thigh is still resting near yours, solid and warm, his scent faint and maddeningly familiarâclean laundry, citrus shampoo, and that soft hit of spice from whatever cologne he throws on without thinking. The TV flickers, but you donât see it. Not when you feel him like that.Â
âDunno,â he murmurs suddenly, voice lower than before. âJust thinking how wild it is that youâre Seikoâs best friend.â You blink out of your daze, glancing over. âWhatâs that supposed to mean?â He turns his head toward you, and for a second, he doesnât answer. He just looks. His eyes flick downâso quick you mightâve missed it, but not really. A lazy sweep across your collarbone, down the slope of your tank top, the faint outline of your chest where the fabric clings too easily without a bra beneath it. And then his gaze flicks back up to meet yours like nothing happened. Youâre suddenly burning. âYouâre just⊠eh, youâre like different now,â he says finally, mouth tugging into something softer than a smirk, but still not safe.
Your throat goes dry. âYou literally told me a few months ago I was like your annoying little sister.â He huffs a laughâlow and amused, almost like heâs laughing at himself. âYeah. People say dumb shit all the time. Obviously I didnât mean it.â His voice is rough around the edges, like the words cost something. Like they meant something. And youâstupidly, helplesslyâcanât tell if you want to shove him away or drag him closer just to find out what the hell heâs thinking. His knee knocks into yours, casual, but it lingers. You glance down at the spot where your legs touch. He hasnât moved. Neither have you. You donât want to. He leans in just a little, stretching his arm further along the back of the couch, fingers now brushing fully against your shoulderâhis pinky grazing your bare skin. Not accidentally this time. You swear you feel the air shift between you. Charged. Tense. He smells even better up close. You can hear the faint scratch of his breath, the creak of the couch when he adjusts, the thump of your own pulse in your ears. The air in the room feels hotter than it should be. Maybe itâs the blanket, maybe itâs the body heat, or maybe itâs the fact that Gojo SatoruâSeikoâs brother, the guy who used to shove Cheeto crumbs in your face and call you gremlinâis now lounging beside you like he didnât just casually imply heâs been thinking about you in a way that definitely isnât brotherly. You try to laugh it off. Try to breathe normally. Try to keep your thoughts from careening off a cliff. But your skin is buzzing under the weight of what he saidâwhat he meantâand itâs getting impossible to sit still. âIâm gonnaâuhâŠâ you start, voice a bit too breathy for your liking. âGrab snacks.â He hums, low and lazy. âOf course you are.â You donât even look at him to know thereâs a smirk playing on his lips. Smug. Fucking smug. You peel the blanket off your lap, heart already thudding in your chest like it knows something you donât. As you rise to your feet, you catch a flicker of movement out of the corner of your eyeâsubtle, fast.
Satoruâs gaze dips. Straight to your ass. You freeze for half a second, spine locking, suddenly very aware of your little lounge shorts, how they cling when you move, how thin the fabric is. Your skin prickles. Maybe it was nothing. Maybe he was just glancing around the room. Maybe heâ But you felt it. And when you dart a glance back at him, heâs already back to facing the TV. Arms sprawled out. Cool and unbothered. Exceptâhis jawâs clenched a little now. One hand is flexing faintly against the armrest, like heâs trying not to react. And you swear, if you didnât know better, youâd think heâs the one trying to calm himself down. You walk to the kitchen way too fast, needing the distance, needing to get air because your thoughts are spiraling again. Did he really look? Was that just your brain on horny autopilot? Are you imagining this whole thing because youâre bored and heâs attractive and close and smells like sin wrapped in cashmere? You yank open a cupboard. It takes you a second to even remember why you came in here.
Oh. Right. Snacks. Behind you, the sound of the TV fills the silence, but your ears are still ringing with what he said. âObviously I didnât mean it.â Those words echo in your chest like a struck bell. Over and over and over. You grab a random bag of chips and pop it open just to keep your hands busy. You nibble one. Youâre not even hungry. You hear the couch creak. Heâs shifting. âSooo,â Satoru calls out, voice stretched and casual like this is nothing, like he didnât just nuke your brain two minutes ago, âyou bringing those back to share or am I supposed to sit here and starve?â You roll your eyes, half grateful heâs still being a dumbass, half annoyed heâs pretending like your body language wasnât screaming confusion and want and maybe something more. You return to the couch, tossing the chips between you both as you sink down. This time, thereâs a full cushion between you, but the tension doesnât go anywhere. He grabs a handful of chips without looking away from the screen. âYou good?â
You nod too quickly. âYeah. Just⊠thinking.â He doesnât push. He just leans forward, his long legs spreading slightly, forearms resting on his thighs. The new position pulls his shirt tighter across his back, and itâs ridiculous, the way you notice the flex in his shoulders. The way your gaze dips now. You're no better than him. Your throat dries again. âSo,â he says after a moment, voice still easy, still pretending, âwhat episode are we even on?â You glance at the screen and realize you couldnât name a single thing thatâs happened in the last ten minutes. âUh. The one where Phil gets stuck in the portable toilet.â
Satoru laughs. âClassic. That guyâs so fucking dumb.â You nod, distracted. You keep catching yourself staring. At his jaw. His hands. That little shadow of stubble growing in because itâs the weekend and he clearly didnât care enough to shave. You wonder what it feels like. What heâd look like if those same hands were pushing your head down on his coâ
No. Nope. Abort. You try to focus on the TV. You try not to think about how he looked at you. How youâre now almost certain you didnât imagine it. But then you feel his thigh bump yours again. Well, as much as someone can with a fucking pillow in between you both. Deliberate this time. Just the lightest nudge. You glance at him, and his eyes are still on the TVâbut his lips? Theyâre tilted in the faintest, most devilish smirk. You bite the inside of your cheek and sit there in silence, knees barely touching, heat coiled tight in your stomach like a secret. The tension is coiled tight between you and Satoruâlike someone pulled a rubber band back and is holding it in place, fingers twitching on the edge of letting go. Neither of you moves. Neither of you breathes too loud. Youâre still thinking about the brush of his thigh against yours, about the way he smirked without really smiling. Your fingers tighten slightly around the edge of the blanket.
Thenâ
The front door creaks open. âHELLO?â Seikoâs voice echoes through the apartment like a goddamn fire drill. âThis house is full of the rudest bitches, I swear.â You sit bolt upright, practically yanking the blanket up to your collarbones as if sheâs about to catch you in something. Satoru casually reaches for another chip, cool as ever. Seiko rounds the corner into the living room, dropping her bag on the floor with a theatrical huff. âI called you,â she says, glaring at her brother. âLike five times. Five. You told me to let you know when I was done!â Satoru lifts a brow, lazy and unapologetic. âI was busy. You survived.â
âI had to take the bus,â she groans, flopping into the armchair like sheâs just returned from war. âThe bus, Satoru. You know how many coughs I heard in ten blocks? You might as well have sentenced me to death.â You snort, trying to play it cool, heart still racing beneath your tank top. âYouâre so dramatic.â
âIâm not dramatic, Iâm chronically disrespected in this house,â she declares, and then her eyes flick to the TV. âOh my god, is this the one where Cam tries to be a clown at Lukeâs party?â
âYeah,â you say. âIt just started.â
âPerfect,â she says, curling up under the throw blanket and stealing the chips off the coffee table. âGod, you and I are literally Cam and Mitch.â You blink. Her and Satoru were eerily alike. âI donât know how to feel about that.â She shrugs. âWe just have a shared delusional flair and a healthy amount of judgment, and I think thatâs beautiful.â Behind you, Satoru exhales a soft, amused sound and stands up, stretching in that obnoxious way that pulls his shirt up just enough to flash a sliver of his toned stomach. You avert your eyes fast. âWell,â he says, voice easy, almost bored, âIâll let you ladies get back to doing⊠whatever this is.â He takes a slow step back toward the stairs, tossing a lazy wave over his shoulderâbut before he turns completely, his eyes flick back to you. Just for a second. Itâs subtle. Barely a second too long. But he holds your gazeâand that same faint, almost imperceptible smirk ghosts across his lips. Itâs not a full smile. Itâs a knowing one. And then heâs gone, padding upstairs without another word, leaving you sitting there with a fake laugh stuck in your throat and your pulse suddenly much louder in your ears. âUgh,â Seiko says, mouth full of chips. âHeâs so annoying. I cannot wait until he gets his own place.â You hum, pretending to agree, but your eyes linger on the stairwell he disappeared into.
Yeah. Annoying. If only it were that simple.
â
Youâve been staring at your reflection so long your own face is starting to look unfamiliar. Two skirts are flung across your bedâone black and slinky, the other plaid and shorter than you remembered it being when you first bought it. You keep switching between them, holding them up against your hips, spinning a little in the mirror, frowning. Itâs stupid. You know itâs stupid. Itâs just a frat party. But itâs one of the big ones. The kind that gets talked about weeks after. The kind where even the art students who pretend they hate frat culture show up and get drunk on jungle juice in someoneâs bathtub. You want to look good. You want to look good. Eventually, fed up with your own indecision, you grab both skirts and swing open your bedroom door, calling, âSeiko, I need you for like two seconds, I swearââ
You barrel straight into something warm and solid andâ
âOofâfuck, sorry,â you mumble, skirts slipping in your grip. Your hands are full, so you bounce off and stumble a step back. Satoru catches your elbow before you can completely lose balance, steadying you with one lazy hand. âHi to you too,â he says, his voice edged with amusement. You blink. âHi. Uhâsorry. I was justâI thought Seiko was still here.â
âShe left like ten minutes ago,â he says, stepping back and glancing over your shoulder, toward your bedroom. âGrocery run or something. Youâve been holed up in your room forever.â You glance down at the two skirts in your hands and shift them awkwardly against your chest, heat licking at the back of your neck. âYeah, Iâuhâwas trying to figure out what to wear.â His gaze lingers. He doesnât say anything right away. Then: âTo the party?â
You nod. A beat of silence. âYou sound stressed,â he says, voice dipping a little. âWhat happened? You sound like youâre about to cry over a skirt.â You roll your eyes. âI just wanted her help picking one.â Thereâs a softness to his expression now. A twitch of his lips that looks suspiciously close to a smirk. âTragic.â You groan and hug the skirts tighter to your chest. âThis is stupid. Iâm being stupid.â
âNah,â he says, casually leaning a shoulder against the wall, arms crossed now. âIt makes sense. Lot of people are gonna be there. First party of the semester everyone actually gives a shit about.â
âExactly,â you mutter, more to yourself. His eyes drag lazily from your bare thighs to your slightly flushed face. Youâre still in the tank top youâd thrown on earlierâone of those thin, soft ones with lace on the straps. âSo,â he says, head tilted, eyes unreadable but fixed on you, âwhat are the options?â You blink. âWhat?â
âThe skirts,â he says, like itâs obvious. âLet me see. Câmon.â You roll your eyes, but your voice still comes out embarrassed. âI just wanted Seikoâs opinion.â He grins. âAnd instead you got mine. Brutal.â
âYeah, Iâm regretting it already.â He pushes off the wall with a little amused hum and steps closer. âLemme see.â You raise an eyebrow. âYou? The fashion expert?â Satoru shrugs. âHey, Iâm good at judging outfits. From the outside and the inside.â Your face burns. âYouâre disgusting.â
He grins. âYouâre the one asking for my opinion while wearing a tank top thatâs basically see-through.â You make a sound of protest and clutch the skirts against you again. âOkay! Thank you, great, very helpful!â He doesnât move. âI mean, either one would look good on you. You haveââ He pauses, lips twitching, âârange.â You squint at him. âWhy do I feel like thatâs not a compliment?â
âBecause you know me.â
You laugh, but it comes out breathier than you intend. Heâs still looking at you. Not in the way guys at parties look. Not even like how he used to look at you months agoâdistant, vaguely amused, older brother of your best friend. This look is different. Lazier. Focused. And then he just casually reaches out, like heâs done a hundred times before, but this time his knuckle grazes the bare skin of your arm when he adjusts the hem of the black skirt in your hand. âGo with this one,â he murmurs, suddenly closer than he was a second ago. âItâs a better choice.â
You swallow. âA better choice?â His eyes flick up. âYeah.â The air feels a little too charged now. A little too tight. Youâre still, not sure what to say, barely sure what youâre breathing. And then, blessedly, he takes a step back, his expression shuttering into something light again. âWell,â he says, âIâll leave you to your existential wardrobe crisis. Let me know if you need my expert fashion advice again.â You nod dumbly, skirts clutched tight. Inside, you drop the plaid skirt to the floor and stare at yourself in the mirror again. Somehow, the decisionâs a lot easier now.
â
âWhat do you mean, Satoru canât drive us to the party?â Seiko screeches, her voice echoing off the tile as she stalks around the apartment in a pair of clacking nude heels, aggressively tapping his contact on her phone. You lunge across the couch, snatching it from her before she rage-texts him something psychotic. âSeikoâcalm down. Itâs not because of the fight. Listen! He said he has a late lab or some shit, okay? Heâs coming later.â She stares at you, lip curled in disbelief, before deflating with a dramatic sigh. âOh.â Thereâs a beat. You watch her face as she recomposes herselfâlike sheâs loading a new expression. A girl rebooting in real time. âSo⊠is he sending us Uber money, orâŠ?â You suppress a grin. âNo need. Suguruâs driving us.â The shift in her demeanor is instant. You swear you catch a spark of actual electricity pass through her body. âOh.â Now her voice is a full octave lower, soft, composed, perfectly pleasant. âThatâs nice.â You snort, giving her a shove. âNice try. But that fake âcool girlâ thing is not working. I know how long youâve liked him, dumbass.â She squeals, spinning in a little circle like you just handed her a backstage pass to her dream concert. âOh my god. You donât understandâthis is like the first time I get to hang out with him without Toruâs annoying ass being all over the place.â You roll your eyes. âYouâre literally acting like a Shoujosei heroine right now. Tone it down before he thinks weâre taking you to the ER for heatstroke.â
But youâre grinning. She waves a hand, unfazed. âWhatever. This is my moment. I need it to be perfect.â You snort and smooth your hands over your outfit one more time. The black skirt he picked sits high on your waist, hugging you like a second skin. Itâs shortâdangerously soâbut structured enough to look intentional. Youâd paired it with a slinky backless top in that kind of soft fabric that feels cool against your skin, and lets just enough cleavage peek through to keep it casual. You mightâve been dressing for yourself. But youâd be lying if you said a part of you wasnât wondering what Satoru would think when he finally saw it. Seiko squeals again as she double-checks her lipstick. âOkay but wait. You said Suguruâs stared at me before. When? Tell me now. Donât lie.âÂ
You shrug, all fake-casual. âMmm. Like twice last week. When you wore that fitted top to the library. Also when you made that stupid joke and he actually laughed.â
âOh my god,â she whispers, hand flying to her chest like you just told her sheâd been accepted into heaven. âI knew it. I thought I was delusional. But you just confirmed it.â Youâre about to tease her again when a familiar honk cuts through the buzz of the apartment. âSpeak of the devil,â you grin. Outside, Suguruâs car is parked by the curb, headlights casting long shadows through the blinds. You head out with Seiko, the cool evening air brushing against your legs as you slide into the backseat. Suguru, behind the wheel, turns slightly to look over his shoulder. âHey.â
âHi,â you reply, amused as Seiko wordlessly climbs into the passenger seat like itâs her destiny. You swear she almost sits with a flourish. She twists toward him. âThanks for picking us up. You look nice.â Suguru gives her a crooked smile. âYou look nice, too.â You almost groan at the tension brewing already. You catch the subtle glance he gives her legs, the quiet, too-smooth âseatbeltâ reminder as he reaches across to pull it out for her. She blushes, mumbling a thanks, and you just sink back into your seat, smiling to yourself like youâve been let in on a joke no one else knows the punchline to. The ride to the frat house is filled with casual conversationâmuted music humming from the car speakers, the windows cracked just enough to let in the city air. As Suguru pulls into a crowded residential street littered with double-parked cars and glowing red solo cups on curbs, Seiko leans forward to point out a spot. Typical frat party energy is already bleeding into the nightâthudding bass in the distance, porch lights glowing warm, a guy doing a keg stand on someoneâs lawn while someone else records with flash on. You smooth your skirt down instinctively as Suguru parallel parks like a pro, killing the engine with a low chuckle. You glance up at him just before stepping out, voice quieter than before. âHey. Do you know when Satoruâs coming?â Suguru gives you a lookâone of those slow, knowing, older-brother-type glances that feels like it sees more than it says. âNot too far away,â he replies, lips twitching. âYouâll see him soon.â He opens his door and gets out, and you follow, the air buzzing louder with the bass as you approach the house. Itâs already fullâbodies moving on the porch, music pounding out the windows, a mix of cheap perfume and sweat and smoke curling through the air. Inside, the light is dim, string lights casting a low amber haze over the crowd. People call greetings, red cups are pressed into hands, and the house is full of the usual noiseâmusic, laughter, flirtation, chaos. You let Seiko tug you in by the hand, eyes scanning the roomânot consciously, not desperately. Just⊠wondering. If heâd see you tonight. If heâd look.
Inside, the house is buzzing. People are packed shoulder to shoulder, someoneâs dog is wearing a backwards cap for some reason, the musicâs loud enough to rattle your ribs, and the air smells like a mix of weed, tequila, and Axe body spray. You and Seiko barely make it past the kitchen before youâre intercepted by a group of mutual friends from one of your guysâ shared elective class.
Youâre nodding along, drink in hand, when you spot someone across the roomâa guy you know from high school? Or maybe the library? The edges of memory are fuzzy from the noise, but you tilt your head and squint, trying to place him. âWaitâexcuse me for a sec,â you say to Seiko, squeezing her wrist. You pivot, winding through the crowd, barely making it five steps before someoneâs shoulder crashes into yours. You reel back instinctively, blinking up.
White hair. Too tall. Light eyes. Hoodie thrown lazily over a plain tee, but still looking like a full time model for Vogue. He smells like cologne and smoke and something faintly citrusy. âWow,â you say automatically, blinking again. âYou actually came.â Satoru smilesâlazy, tilted, boyish. Like heâs just been caught in something he enjoys too much to lie about. âYeah,â he says. âTook an Uber. Not planning on being sober tonight.â You laugh, brushing your hair behind your ear. âSame. But Seiko and Suguru are both staying sober, which is kind of impressive given the circumstances.â He raises an eyebrow, like he already knows exactly what circumstances you mean. âAh. Right, right.â Thereâs a pauseâjust long enough for his eyes to drop to your legs. Then, casually, like heâs not saying anything crazy at all, he leans a little closer. âSo⊠you wore the skirt.â You grin. âYeah, I did. Is it nice?â He snorts under his breath like please, then runs a hand through his hair. âYou know it is.â You roll your eyes. âYou donât even remember which one it was.â He pretends to be offended, placing a hand over his chest. âThatâs actually insane of you to say. Of course I remember. It was this one. The black one. Little zipper on the side.â
You blink. âThere was no zipper.â He squints. âOkay. True. I made that part up. But it looks like it could have a zipper.â You laugh, shaking your head as you sip your drink. Youâre about to clap back when someone bumps into him from behind, sending him a half-step into you. His hand lands lightly on your arm to steady himself, just for a secondâwarm fingers, calloused from god knows what, brushing your bare skin. You both go still for half a beat.
Then heâs grinning again. âYou having fun?â You nod. âYeah. Itâs actually a good party. Not too many freshmen. No oneâs cried in the kitchen yet.â He laughs. âGive it an hour.â You donât respondâjust bite the inside of your cheek to keep your smile at bay. His gaze lingers on your face for a second too long. Someone behind you pops a can of something and the fizzing sound makes you both blink.
âWell,â he says, standing a bit straighter, âshould we find the others?â You nod, gesturing vaguely toward the back of the house. âYeah. Theyâre by the pong table.â As you both start walking side by side through the house, you canât help but glance sideways at him. Heâs looking ahead, but thereâs that same smirk playing at the corner of his mouth. The same one from the apartment earlier. Knowing. Lazy. A little smug. A little dangerous. You finally make your way toward the makeshift beer pong table someoneâs set up near the back of the frat house. Itâs surrounded by half-drunken students, red solo cups, and a poor folding table thatâs seen too many parties and not enough soap. You spot Ryomen Sukuna chatting to some girlâhis chem lab partner? Odd, she was way too nice to talk to a guy like himâ by the drinks table, his gaze unabashedly admiring her form. A cheer goes up as someone lands a shot, and you hear Seikoâs unmistakable laughâshrill, excitedâoff to the left, where sheâs clapping dramatically for Suguru, whoâs currently in what looks likeâŠ? A competition to see who can stay in a handstand for the longest? Is that Toji Zenin with him?
âI was wondering where you ran off to,â Seiko says when she sees you. Her eyes briefly dart to Satoru, then back to you, and you give her a look that says: Donât. Start. âMe and Satoru are gonna take a shot at this next game,â you say quickly, already setting your drink down and rolling your shoulders like a boxer entering the ring. Satoru raises a brow. âWe are?â
âYou scared?â He grins. âNah, Iâd win. I always win these.â
âYouâre the one with freakishly long arms, so I guess I need to have more confidence in you,â you say, pointing at him. âYou better land every cup.â
âI will. As long as you look pretty while doing the distractions.â
You blink. âThatâs so sexist.â
âAnd yet, you smiled.â You try to smack his arm but heâs already ducking around you, grabbing a couple of ping pong balls from the table while the other team clears out. A small group starts to gather as you both step up to the tableâprobably because Satoru Gojo doing anything draws attention, but also because youâre not exactly subtle about whisper-arguing with him about technique. âOkay,â he says, tossing a ball up and down like itâs a warm-up. âWeâre playing standard rules. Elbow behind the edge, reracks at 6 and 3, bounce shots count for two. You know how to play, right?â You make a face. âSort of.â
âOh my god.â
âI didnât come to college to learn about sports, Satoru.â
âItâs beer pong,â he groans. âItâs not a sport, itâs survival.â You flip him off, but youâre laughing. He lets you shoot first. Your ball clinks off the rim of a cup and bounces harmlessly to the floor. Satoru whistles low. âStrong start.â
âShut up and make your freak arm useful.â He sinks the shot. Effortlessly. Doesnât even blink. Of course he does. You sigh, already resigned to being carried. âCome here,â he says, waving you over like itâs no big deal. You narrow your eyes. âWhat?â
âYour formâs all wrong. Youâre like. Flicking it. This isnât badminton.â
âI donât flickââ
âCome here.â Heâs behind you in a second. You feel his body brush against your back, the faint warmth of him just close enough to register without being obvious. His hand slides along your forearm, adjusting your grip on the ball.
âRelax your wrist,â he murmurs, and now his chin is practically over your shoulder. You swallow. âLike this,â he continues, his hand still guiding yours. âItâs more of a lob. Use your fingertips. Gentle. Thatâs itâ ah, good girl. â You try not to think about the way he says gentle. Or good girl. Or the way his breath is hitting your neck in warm puffs between words. âYou realize youâre totally milking this under the guise of tutoring me,â you say, heart thudding faster. âObviously.â His grin curls against your cheek. âYou gonna shoot or what?â
You shoot. You land it. The group around the table erupts, laughing and shouting. You turn around, triumphant. âHoly shitââ
Satoruâs grinning, arms raised like heâs just coached a champion. âThatâs my girl.â Your stomach does something very stupid at those words. You try to ignore it. The game continues like thatâbanter, shots, shoulder brushes, the occasional low âgood jobâ from Satoru that lights up every neuron in your body. Youâre not sure how much is the alcohol and how much is just him, but your face is warm and your hands shake a little more every time he reaches past you. At one point, someone makes a distracting joke and you miss horribly, groaning as the ball flies way off. Satoru leans close and mutters, âYou need to take your revenge.â
âHow?â
âDistraction tactics. Classic.â You eye him. âWhat, like flash a tit?â He laughs loudly, throwing his head back. âJesus, no. I mean, you could, but maybe start smaller.â You giggle. âLike what?â He leans in again, voice lower. âDo that thing where you bend over to pick something up slow.â You look at him, deadpan. âDude, what?â He shrugs, unapologetic. âIâm not blind.â You end up not bending over or doing whatever Satoru had been telling you to do, instead you just plainly smile at the guy on the opposing end of the table, hoping it does the job. And it does. Dramatically. And the frat guy across from you absolutely chokes on his shot. You land the next cup clean. What can be said? Youâre extremely gorgeous. Satoru claps you on the back like a coach. âWhatâd I tell you? Iconic.â Youâre both laughing too hard now. And a little too close. Eventually, the game endsâyou winâand thereâs a flurry of congratulations and another drink thrust into your hand. You feel light and flushed and way too aware of the guy still standing next to you like he belongs there.Â
âYouâre better at this than I expected,â Satoru says, sipping from his own drink now. âYeah, I thrive under pressure.â Youâre mid-sip of some questionably pink drink when Satoru leans down, tipping his head toward your ear so casually it makes your stomach do that stupid flutter thing again. âYo,â he says, nodding toward a different room where you can see bodies shifting and crowding around a makeshift open circle. âWhatâs going on over there?â You blink. âDunno. Is that⊠a dance circle?â
âNah,â he grins. âNo oneâs moving that confidently.âÂ
You snort. âYou wanna check it out?â
âI was about to ask you the same thing,â he says, and the way his voice dips just slightly makes it feel like heâs not just talking about the crowd. âSure,â you say before you can overthink it. The two of you squeeze your way into the room, jostled on all sides by a sea of people shouting and laughing and pushing in toward the circle. The floorâs sticky, the airâs muggy, and someone bumps into your back hard enough that you stumbleâand before you can find your footing, a flash of blue disappears ahead of you. âSatoru?â you call, but your voice is drowned out by a chant going up in the center. And just like that, heâs gone. Youâre shoved toward the edge of the circle, almost tripping over a couch leg before managing to flop down beside some guy in a bucket hat holding a solo cup like itâs sacred. You glance around, heart racing, trying to spot that stupid head of white hair somewhere in the crowd. The guy next to you chuckles. âFirst time at one of these?â You glance over. âOne of what?â He gestures with his cup. âSpin the bottle. Slash seven minutes in heaven. Slash drink whatever disgusting cocktail that bowl has if you bail. Itâs a house rule.â You blink. âIâm sorry. What?â
âDonât worry,â he shrugs. âYou can decline. But then you gotta chug whateverâs in that punch bowl. And itâs, uh⊠unholy.â You look to the center where sure enough, thereâs a half-filled bottle spinning on the floor like itâs trying to find a victim. A few people are already crowding behind it, sitting cross-legged like some cursed sleepover. And the punch bowl heâs talking about? It looks like someone dumped red Gatorade, vodka, pickle juice, and maybe NyQuil into the same pot and called it âedgy.â You whip your head around againâSatoru is, of course, lounging cross-legged on the other side of the circle now, chatting with some people you vaguely recognize from class. He looks like he belongs there, all sprawled limbs and lazy smirk, like this kind of chaos was built for him. When he catches your gaze, he waves. Waves. You shoot him a you left me to die glare. He mouths something back that looks suspiciously like, âHave fun.â Before you can get up and leave, someone shouts, âALRIGHT! EVERYONE SHUT UPâRULES ARE THE SAME. SPIN LANDS ON YOU, EITHER GO IN THE CLOSET OR DRINK. NO BACKING OUT.â And just like that, the first spin hits a girl in a crop top and some guy who looks like heâs about to pass out. Laughter, whistles, cheersâthen theyâre stumbling off toward the dark little closet in the corner like lambs to the slaughter. You sit frozen, drink clutched to your chest like a life preserver. The bottle spins again.
Not you. Then again. Still not you. Then: you. You freeze, neck stiff as your nameâs called. Itâs some guy youâve never seen in your life. He winks. You immediately reach for the punch bowl. The crowd yells as you choke down the mystery concoction. It burns like betrayal. Another few rounds go by. You watch people you know and people you donât vanish into that cursed closet. You try not to count the minutes. Try not to watch Satoru each time he gets picked. And yetâyou do. Twice the bottle lands on him. Both times he just laughs and reaches for the drink, wincing as he gulps it down. Your stomach does that thing again. You donât want to care. Finally, the bottle spins, slower this time, teetering between two people. It seems to almost stop on the bucket hat guy next to youâuntil the neck slides a few inches more and lands squarely⊠on you. Your heart lurches. Then it spins againâand lands on him.
Satoru. It goes so quiet, you can hear the bass vibrating through the floorboards. Someone cackles. âOhhhhhh shitââÂ
You look at him. Heâs already watching you, a crooked, loose-limbed smile stretching across his lips. âAlright, alright,â someoneâs saying. âOr you can drink, but Iâm warning you, the new mix is, like, fucking illegal.â
âYeah,â someone else adds, âToru, you already tapped out of two. You're out of lives.â Satoru throws his head back and groans. âShit.â He locks eyes with you again. âWell?â you ask, voice a little smaller than you mean it to be. âYou tell me,â he says, tone light but eyes dark. âCloset or cocktail?â You hesitate. You could back out. You should back out. But heâs standing already, towering in his black tee and the chain peeking out from under his collar, holding out a hand to you with that infuriating confidence. âLetâs go,â he says. âNo way Iâm drinking that pickle NyQuil bullshit. My kidneys are failing already.â A cheer erupts.
âSEVEN MINUTES STARTING NOW!â You feel someone gently shoving you forward, and then youâre walkingâstumblingâtoward the little coat closet with Satoru beside you, hand hovering behind your back like heâs making sure you donât fall. Inside, itâs pitch black. You both tumble in, bumping into each other, the door slamming shut behind you with a click. Itâs cramped. Shoulders touching. Knees knocking. You can hear him breathing. And somewhere outside, someoneâs laughing like this is the funniest shit theyâve ever seen. You swallow. âThank god Seikoâs not here,â you mutter under your breath. âSpeak for yourself,â Satoru says casually. âI think this is character-building.â
âCharacter-building?â you repeat, incredulous. âYeah.â His voice is low, amused. âWeâre trapped. Small space. Zero distractions. Forced eye contact if there was any light.â You laugh, nervous. âThis is not how I imagined dying.â
âIf we die in a frat closet,â he says seriously, âI just want you to know itâs been an honor.â You laugh again, this time a little too loudly. You donât notice how close heâs gotten until you shift and your knees knock againâhis thigh against yours. Warm. Solid. âIs it hot in here?â you mumble.
âItâs definitely not cold.â You donât respond right away. Neither does he. Itâs suddenly too quiet. You can feel his gaze, even in the dark. And somehow, you knowâyou knowâthat whatever happens next will not be played off as just another party game. The silence wraps around the two of you, warm and humming and too dense to ignore. Your back hits the closet wall, and you swear you can hear your own heartbeat pounding louder than the music outside. Somewhere, someone yells about shotgunning a beer, and it sounds so far away compared to the stillness between you and him. Satoru shifts beside you, his voice low and careful. âHeyâjust so you know, we donât have to do anything in here.â He says it casually, like itâs no big deal. His shoulder brushes yours. âOh,â you say. You try to sound neutral. Chill. Normal. You fail. âUmâno, itâs okay. We can do stuff.â He huffs out a laugh, and itâs so goddamn warm in the closet and so him that your cheeks burn on contact. âWe can do stuff,â he repeats, teasing. âWow. Thatâs seductive.â You groan and immediately bury your face in your hands. âI didnât mean it like that, oh my god.â He laughs again, this time a little breathless. âNah, Iâm into it. Super smooth delivery.â
âIâm drunk,â you whine, still hiding. âIâm tipsy. I literally cannot be held accountable for anything I say.â
âOh, now youâre pulling the legal disclaimer.â
âIâm gonna die in this closet. Like, emotionally.â He shifts again, and you feel itâhis thigh pressing more into yours, his arm now behind your back along the wall like heâs boxing you in without even meaning to. Or maybe he is meaning to. Maybe this is the point. Maybe youâre just slow to realize it. He opens his mouthâprobably to say something sarcastic and obnoxious, like alwaysâbut you donât let him. You donât know if itâs the cheap cocktails or the lingering electricity from that beer pong game or just how close he is in this tight little space, but your body moves before your brain can catch up. You lean forward and kiss him. You only mean to peck him once, test the waters, but the second your lips meet his, he responds. Hard. His hand finds your waist with immediate purpose, dragging you closer until your chest is pressed against his, the scent of his cologne and sweat and cheap beer swirling around your head like smoke. His other hand fists into the fabric of your top, knuckles brushing your ribs, and heâs kissing you like heâs been waiting for this, mouth hot and demanding and perfect. You gasp a little when his tongue brushes yours, and he swallows it greedily like he wants to hear that sound again. And again. And again. Youâre vaguely aware that youâre making noises, little broken gasps against his lips, but you donât care. Youâre half in his lap now, one leg slung lazily over his as your back presses to the closet wall. His grip tightens at your hip like heâs trying to keep himself anchored, but itâs not working. He breaks the kiss just for a secondâonly long enough to breathe against your mouth. âFuck,â he mumbles, voice ragged. âYou taste like whateverâs in that drink. That horrifying punch. But you still taste good. What the fuck.â
You laugh a little, dazed. âYou too.â Then he kisses you againâdeeper this time, rougherâand itâs suddenly impossible to remember what the hell you were ever nervous about. His hand slides under the hem of your shirt, palm flat and hot against your bare skin. You shiver, and he smirks against your mouth, like he felt it. âCold?â he asks, voice muffled by the skin of your neck as he kisses along your jaw. âShut up,â you whisper back, breathless. He doesnât. His mouth is relentless. He kisses like heâs starving. His lips drag down the slope of your neck, his tongue wet and hot as it traces up the column of your throat. âGod,â you breathe. âYouâre soââ
âYeah?â he grins against your skin. âSay it.â
âNo.â
âCoward.â You grin and push him back lightly, but it just makes him grin harderâuntil he catches your wrists and gently pins them beside your head, still smiling like a little shit. âYou kissed me,â he says.Â
âYou let me kiss you.â
âDamn right I did.â And then he kisses you again, harder this time, like a promise. You forget where you are. You forget your name. You forget the stupid crowd outside or the timer ticking down. The only thing you know is his mouth, his hands, the heat thatâs spiking through your body like wildfire. You moan into his mouthâand this time, he groans. Low. Rough. Dangerous. And you get the sudden, dizzying feeling that if someone doesnât knock on this door in the next ten seconds, you might not make it out of this closet with your clothes still on. The closet is too dark to think straight. Too warm. His breath is hot against your skin, and your backâs pressing into the wall like itâs the only thing holding you up. Your legs are still half-draped over his, and his handâs still under your shirtâhis palm splayed wide across your waist like he forgot he put it there and now refuses to move. Youâre kissing again before either of you says another word. Itâs not careful anymore. Not testing the waters. This is all open mouths and low groans, tongue and teeth and the dizzying clash of teeth when one of you gets impatient. His grip shifts, and suddenly his hand is sliding further up, rough fingers grazing your ribs until his thumb just barely brushes under your bra. You freeze for half a second, the sharp spark of oh shit cutting through your haze. But then his mouth drags down your neck again, open and wet and hungry, and any coherent thought short-circuits in your brain.
âSatoru,â you breathe. You donât mean to say it like that. You donât mean to say it at all. It just falls out of you, broken and breathy and a little desperate. He groans.
âSay that again.â
âNo.â
âBoo, party pooper.â Youâre both smilingâgiddy, a little drunk, a little overwhelmedâand he noses at your cheek before dragging you in for another kiss. This oneâs slower. He licks into your mouth like heâs tasting you, savoring you, like youâre something heâs wanted for way too long and canât get enough of now that he has you. His thigh shifts between yours andâgodâyour hips roll on instinct. You feel his breath catch in his throat. Your lips part against his, and thatâs all it takes for him to move. His hands are on your hips, guiding you down onto his thigh again, and the friction makes your brain completely short-circuit. You bite back a sound, but itâs embarrassing how easily your body reacts to him. How natural it feels to rock against him like thisâslow, messy, clothed, but blistering. âFuck,â he whispers, his voice rasping low in your ear. âYouâre really doing this, huh.â
âDonât act surprised,â you mutter, head tipping back when his mouth finds that one spot under your ear. âIâm not,â he admits, voice rough. âIâm justâfuckâIâm so into it.â Youâre both breathing hard now, the air between you sticky and thick with heat. Your fingers slide up into his hair, tugging just enough to make him groan, and thatâs it. Thatâs the moment he slips both hands under your skirt, palms warm on your thighs. He squeezes lightly, like heâs checkingâaskingâand you nod, burying your face into his shoulder. âTouchy tonight, huh?â he murmurs into your skin.Â
âDonât be smug.â
âImpossible. Iâm literally in a closet with you grinding on me. I win.â You shove at his shoulder, and he laughs, this quiet, messy sound that turns right into another kiss. His hands wander again, fingers sliding along the edges of your underwear with just enough pressure to tease but not enough to do anything. You whimper. Quietly. Against his mouth. He bites your lower lip. And thatâs when thereâs a knock at the closet door. You both freeze. The knock comes againâfollowed by a tipsy voice yelling, âTIMEâS UP, CLOSET LOVERS. MOVE IT OR LOSE IT.â
You donât even move at first. Just sit there. Half tugged up by him around his waist. Half undone. Breathing like you ran a mile. You blink at each other. He grins first. âThat was like⊠two minutes,â he whispers.
âSwear to god, if Seikoâs out thereââ
âWeâll lie,â he says, totally unbothered, smoothing down your skirt and grinning lazily. âYou fell. I helped you up. We kissed a little. No laws were broken.â You snort, cheeks still on fire. But you canât help itâyou lean forward, just once more, and kiss him. Softly. Just one little press. He hums into it. Hands still on your hips like heâs not letting go the second the door opens. âYou okay?â he asks, quietly this time. No teasing. No jokes. You nod. âYeah.â And then you add, with a shaky laugh, âBut next time we do something like this⊠please not in a literal party closet.â His grin is smug. âNext time?â You shove him again. He opens the door. And the second it does, a wave of music, noise, and light crashes in like youâve broken the seal on a private, heated little world. You both step outâyour hair tousled, lips kiss-swollen, heart racingâand pretend like nothing happened.
âWanna make another bad decision?âÂ
You tilt your head. âLike what?â
âBathroomâs unlocked.â You stare at him. He stares right back. You give a small nod, imperceptible almost, and then heâs grabbing your wrist, dragging you down the hall. You donât even check if someoneâs watching. You just move, fast, stumbling a little behind him as he shoves open the bathroom door and pulls you in behind him. Click. The lock slides into place. Silence. Your back hits the bathroom door. And Satoruâs right thereâcrowding into your space, bracing a hand beside your head like heâs trying to hold himself back, like heâs giving you that split-second window to change your mind. You donât take it. Satoru spins you around and backs you up against the counter like heâs done this beforeâlike heâs been thinking about it since the first time you argued over the last chocolate bar or something. His mouth finds yours in seconds, and this time itâs not playful. Itâs hungry. Hot. Desperate. You tug on his shirt, dragging him closer, and he laughs into your mouth, breathless and boyish and so into it. His hands slide up your thighs, rough palms on bare skin, fingers playing with the hem of your black skirt like he canât help himself. âYou know, this skirt that youâre wearing? The one I picked out?â he mutters, mouth moving down to your jaw, then under your ear.
You nod, dizzy. âUh-huh.â
âGood choice,â he grins, hands squeezing your ass over the fabric. âItâs fucking hot.â You whimper. Actually whimper. And he groans, like youâve just undone him. âYouâre killinâ me,â he breathes, forehead pressed to yours. âYouâre actuallyââ
Your skirt rides up. Your thighs part. And his body slots right between them. âYou sure?â he pants, nipping at your lip. âWe donât have toââ
You grab the front of his shirt and yank him closer. âI know we donât have to.â
Pause.
âBut I want to.â That does it. His mouth is back on yours before you finish breathing the sentence, and now his hands are everywhereâyour hips, your waist, under your top. Your hands tangle in his stupid white hair, tugging just enough to make him hiss and grind into you, hard enough to make you gasp. âShit,â he mumbles against your mouth. âWe should be careful.â You bite your lip. âWhy?â
âBecause if we keep going, Iâm not gonna stop.â Your breath catches. You kiss him. Slow and deep. âSomeoneâs gonna notice weâre gone,â you whisper, even though you make no move to stop touching him. He nips your neck. âLet them.â
âSatoruââ
You donât have time to laugh before he lifts youâjust like that, hands under your thighs, and sits you on the cold marble counter. Your skirt hikes up to your waist, and his eyes drag down your thighs with an audible breath, eyes glancing over on the wet spot forming on the front of your pink panties, fingers already slipping beneath the waistband of your underwear like he canât wait. Youâre kissing againâhot and messy and open-mouthedâwhile his hand works fast, dragging the fabric to the side and letting out the dirtiest fucking sound when he feels how soaked you are.
âJesus,â he groans, forehead to yours. âAll this for me?â You glare. âNo, for Suguru. Obviously for you.âÂ
That grinâthat goddamn smug Satoru Gojo grinâflicks across his face. âShouldâve known,â he says, fingers sliding over you now, teasing but desperate. âI really get you going, huh?â You moan, hips stuttering, hands fumbling with his belt now. âToruâplease.â That does it. The second you breathe his name like that, heâs movingâshoving down his jeans and boxers just enough, grabbing a condom from his back pocket like the cocky frat boy you know he is. âI swear,â he mutters, tearing it open, âI was not expecting to use this tonight.â
You give him a look. âBullshit.â He laughs low. âOkay, maybe I hoped. Come on, havenât been laid in ages.â Then? Then heâs right there, dragging your hips to the edge, rubbing himself against you slowly, teasing. Too slowly. âSatoru,â you whisper, grabbing his shirt, pulling. âNow.â He groansâand then pushes in, slow at first, filling you in a way that makes your whole body arch off the counter. âFuck,â he pants, gripping your hips like heâll lose it if he doesnât anchor himself. âYou feelâJesus.â
Your breath stutters out. âMoveâplease.â And he does. He fucks you like the party doesnât exist. Like the music isnât thumping just outside the door. Like someone wonât knock at any second. Hard, deep thrustsâhis hand muffling your moans when they get too loud, your nails clawing down his back under his shirt. He kisses you through it, open-mouthed and filthy, murmuring curses against your lips like heâs losing it, too. âDidnât think this would happen tonight,â he says between thrusts, voice ragged. Youâre gasping. âMe eitherâoh my Godâbut donât stop.â He doesnât. If anything, he fucks into you harder, like your words lit him up, hips snapping forward, making you see stars. You cling to him, head falling to his shoulder, trying so hard not to moan too loud when he shifts his angle and hits just right.
âSatoruââ
âI know,â he grits out, kissing your shoulder, your neck. âYouâre so fucking tightâshit.â The counter creaks beneath you. His hands are gripping your thighs, and youâre clinging to his shirt, and when you finally comeâclenching around him, eyes flutteringâhe groans like you just knocked the breath out of him. He follows fast. Gasping your name, forehead buried in your neck, hips stuttering as he finishes with a shudder and a string of muttered curses. The room falls quiet except for your heavy breathing. Youâre still panting when he finally lifts his head, face flushed, hair messy, looking more fucked-out than youâve ever seen him.
âHoly shit,â he mutters, eyes half-lidded. âPussy is too good.â You smack his chest, still catching your breath. âWay to ruin a moment.â He laughs, arms wrapping around your waist, forehead resting against yours. Outside, the bass drops again. Inside, he kisses youâsweet, slow now. Like he wants this again. And again. You're still half-breathless when you peel yourself off the bathroom counter, shaky legs dangling before you touch the floor. Satoru leans back, hair a mess, lips kiss-bruised and glistening, grinning like he just won a game he wasnât even supposed to be playing. You glance at yourself in the mirror and immediately groan. âGod,â you mutter, fixing your hair with trembling fingers. âI look like I just got railed in a frat bathroom.â
âYou did just get railed in a frat bathroom,â Satoru offers, obnoxiously proud. Heâs zipping his jeans, running a hand through his tousled white hair, utterly unfazed. âShut up.â You swat his chest as he snickers. âFix yourself. Your hair looks like youâre Goku from Dragon Ball Z right now.â
He checks. âOh. Shit.â You both burst into quiet, breathy laughter, like two kids caught in the middle of something reckless and brilliant. The bathroom still smells faintly like the citrusy hand soap, alcohol, and youâGod, youâclinging to Satoruâs skin like perfume. You tug your skirt down. Itâs wrinkled. Your thigh is slightly sticky. You donât even want to think about it right now. âWait,â you whisper, holding your arms out like a human barricade. âAre we going out together?â Satoru looks at you, then toward the door, considering. âNah,â he says finally, lips twitching. âIâll give you a 60 second head start. Real secret agent vibes.â He pulls you in before you can leave, pressing one last kiss to your mouth, slower this time, his hand cradling your jaw like heâs trying to memorize the shape of you. When you pull back, you're flushed again. âGo,â he says, voice low. âBefore I forget weâre trying to be subtle.â You open the door and slip out fast, stepping into the dim hallway. It takes you a second to adjust to the bass again, the flood of people, the bright overhead lights that make everything feel too real. You make a beeline toward the kitchen like you havenât just been completely wrecked in the bathroom, grabbing the nearest cup you can find and pretending to drink something even though itâs mostly just melted ice and backwash.
Thenâ
âYo!â Someone calls your name from across the room. Not Satoru. Just a classmate. You wave, hoping they donât notice how warm your cheeks are. Youâre mid-conversation when, exactly one minute later, Satoru wanders in from the other side of the room. Cool as ever. You both lock eyes for the briefest secondâand he winks at you like an absolute menace before joining some people near the pong table. You swear your knees go weak all over again. As youâre sipping from your cup and attempting to regulate your heart rate, your phone buzzes.
Torustill taste u on my tongue lol
You immediately lock the screen and shove it into your pocket like it just caught fire. Across the room, he catches your expression. Smiles. Smug. Lazy. Like he owns the whole fucking house. You shake your head, lips twitching as you pretend not to look at him again. But you do. A few times. And each time, heâs already looking back.Â
The car ride home is a blur of motion, low music, and the afterglow of too many drinks and too little inhibition. Youâre squished in the backseat of Suguruâs car, shoulder-to-shoulder with Satoru as Seiko loudly insists on shotgunningââI called it like thirty minutes ago, Satoru, donât even try meââand Suguru just raises a brow like why did I agree to this? You're half pressed against the window, the cold glass seeping into your flushed skin. Satoruâs thigh is warm beside yours. Too warm. Or maybe youâre just hyperawareâof him, of yourself, of the fact that less than an hour ago he had his hands under your skirt and his mouth on your neck. âUgh,â Seiko moans from the passenger seat. âSuguru, drive slower. Iâm gonna puke.â
âYou said faster two minutes ago.â
âWell now I say slower. Unless you want vomit on your dashboard.â
Suguru sighs and taps the brakes. Beside you, Satoru chuckles low in his throat. Itâs not even directed at you, but it ripples down your spine like a dropped match. He shifts, resting his arm casually along the backseat behind you, not quite touchingâbut close. So close. You try not to look at him. You fail. His hair is still tousled. Thereâs a markâbarely-thereâon the edge of his jawline. You wonder if he noticed it in the mirror at the party. You wonder if he knows itâs from you. You blink away the thought and stare hard out the window as Suguru pulls up to your apartment. The car slows to a stop, and suddenly all of you are groaning and tumbling out, drunk and exhausted. âEveryone drink water before bed,â Suguru calls after you and Seiko, who are giggling as you shuffle toward the door. âDonât be dumbasses tomorrow.â
âYes, Mom,â Satoru mutters. You all collapse into the apartment like a pile of overripe fruitâsweet, bruised, and sticky with the night. No words. Just Seiko drifting into her room with a loud yawn, mumbling something about being glad she didnât drink tonight. Satoru disappearing into his own with an unreadable look over his shoulder, and you stumbling into yours with your head spinning. The moment your door shuts behind you, you exhale hard. And then you feel it. The ache between your legs. The ghost of his mouth on yours. Your lips are swollen. Your hairâs a mess. And thereâs a bite markânot aggressive, but definitely thereâon your collarbone. You donât even change clothes. You just fall face-first into your bed and let the haze swallow you whole.
The morning hits like a truck. You wake up with your tongue glued to the roof of your mouth and your thoughts screaming. What did I do? Your brain floods with flashes: the kiss in the closet. The way heâd looked at you in the bathroom mirror. His laugh, low and cocky. The stretch of his hand around your thigh. His voice against your neckâ
You sit up way too fast and groan. Okay. Okay. Think. Was it just the alcohol? A one-time thing? He is a flirt. He does sleep around. But he didnât flirt with anyone else that night. And he didnât go into the closet with anyone else. And he kissed you like he meant it. You press your hands to your face. You donât even know what you want. Do you want it to have been a one-time thing? Or are you hoping heâll bring it up again? Are you hoping heâll come knock on your door right now? You stare at your bedroom door. Itâs way too quiet outside. No Seiko, no Satoru. You check the timeâpast noon. Theyâre probably both still dead asleep. But what if heâs not? What if heâs in the kitchen? What if you walk out there and itâs awkward as hell and he doesnât even look at you the same? Your heart starts pounding. Youâre suddenly, intensely aware that youâre still wearing that damn black skirt. Itâs wrinkled and rides up your thighs in your bed like a cruel joke. You pull your blanket over your head and groan. Nope. Youâre not going out there. Not yet. Not until you know what the hell to say to the boy who fucked you over a sink last night and then waved at you across the room like he hadnât just ruined your entire life. You eventually force yourself out of bed. It takes a long, boiling shower, half a bottle of ibuprofen, and several internal pep talks, but you finally open your bedroom door and step into the hallwayâblank expression, huge hoodie, and an unholy craving for caffeine.
The apartment is quiet. No Seiko. No Suguru. But you hear faint kitchen soundsârunning water, a mug clinking against the counter. Your stomach drops. You turn the corner. Satoruâs there. Leaning over the counter with a mug in one hand and his phone in the other, looking very not hungover. His hair is dampâheâs clearly already showeredâand heâs in a pair of loose sweats, shirtless, like he doesnât even know what modesty is. You almost turn around. But he glances up. And youâre already seen. âOh,â he says, like youâve bumped into him at the fucking supermarket, notâwell. Not after last night. âMorning.â
You blink. âHey.â He sets his phone down. You make a beeline for the coffee machine, not looking at him. You feel him watching you, though. And not in a last night way. Not in a âyou looked so good riding me against the bathroom sinkâ way. More like⊠a confused âare we just pretending that never happened?â kind of way. You clear your throat. âYou sleep okay?â He pauses a beat too long. âYeah,â he says finally. âYou?â You nod. Pour yourself coffee. âFine.â Silence. You sip. He sips. The room is so quiet you can hear the tick of the old wall clock. âSoâŠâ you say, and instantly regret it. You donât even know what you were going to follow that up with. Thereâs no âso.â Thereâs no normal segue into hey remember when you pushed my panties to the side and said I was making too much noise? You donât even finish the thought. He scratches the back of his neck. âSo,â he echoes with a crooked smile, âthat was a party, huh?â You huff out a laugh that sounds more like a cough. âYeah. Yeah, it⊠was.â Silence again. You glance over at himâand heâs looking at you. Not in a teasing way. Not flirty, not smug. Just⊠like heâs trying to read you. Gauge your reaction. His voice is careful when he says, âI didnât think we were doing spin the bottle last night.â
âOh yeah,â you say lightly, hoping your smile doesnât look as forced as it feels. âThat was a⊠surprise.â He hums. Sips again. Neither of you brings up the closet. Or the bathroom. You both stand there, drinking bad coffee in your shared silence, pretending like nothing did. And somehow thatâs worse. You suddenly canât stand itâthe way your heart keeps jumping every time he shifts, like youâre waiting for him to say something. Clarify something. But he doesnât. And you donât. So instead, you mutter, âIâm gonna go back to my room.â He looks at you for half a second too long. Nods. âYeah. Okay.â You carry your coffee out, heart beating stupidly fast. You shut your door behind you and lean against it like you just escaped something dangerous. Because you did. You escaped the conversation where he mightâve said it was a mistake. But now you donât know if he wanted to say the opposite, either. And the not-knowing might just kill you first. You hear the shuffle of his feet in the hallwayâhis bedroom door creaking open, the sigh he lets out when he realizes the apartment is still quiet. But youâre already locked inside your room, sitting in bed in one of your oversized hoodies, a brutal hangover kicking at your temples. You don't even check your phone. You just stare at the ceiling, mouth dry, heart pounding. God. What the hell did you do?
â
By Monday, itâs not just a one-day silence. It turns into a pattern. You start rehearsing escape routesâroutes that avoid the kitchen, the couch, his side of campus. Youâre back to taking the bus instead of the ride he always used to offer, lying to Seiko with dumb excuses like âI left earlyâ or âI had to drop by the post office.â When he passes you in the hallway of your apartment, you duck into your room before he can speak. He notices. You can feel it.
On Tuesday, you hear the jangle of his keys, the creak of the front door, and his heavy, dragging steps like heâs tired. You hold your breath when his steps pause in front of your door for just a second too long. Then they continueâout to the living room. You exhale only after the TV starts playing. You donât know why youâre avoiding him so hard. Maybe itâs the embarrassment. The fact that you kissed him first. That you dragged him into the bathroom like a fucking hormonal maniac. That you wanted him. That he let you want him. You replay the way he looked at you in the mirror. The way he kissed you like heâd been thinking about it for weeks. But maybe thatâs just how he kisses. Maybe it didnât mean anything. You feel sick. And then thereâs the other thing. The gnawing guilt of knowing this isnât just some random guy. This is Seikoâs older brother. You practically grew up knowing him, teasing him, getting teased back. Sheâs known about your stupid little high school crushâbut she never knew itâd turn into this. And even though sheâd never be mad, a part of you feels like you broke a silent code. Like you crossed something.
So now you smile extra wide when youâre with her. Laugh too loud. Ask too many questions about Suguru, just to keep her focused on anything else. You donât mention Satoru. You never do. And she doesnât bring him up either, like maybe she senses somethingâs off. Satoru, on the other hand? Heâs not playing pretend. By Wednesday, heâs straight-up glaring at you in the kitchen. You enter to grab a water bottle and find him already there, shirtless, hair tousled from sleep. He glances up from his mug of coffee, and his jaw tics when you avoid eye contact, grab the bottle, and turn around with barely a âMorning.â
âSeriously?â he mutters under his breath.
You donât stop walking. You donât ask what he means. You just shut your bedroom door behind you again and let your back make contact with your bed, heart racing in your ribs. Thursday at campus, he walks straight past you outside the lecture hall, pretending to text. He doesnât stop. Doesnât smile. Doesnât say hi. Youâd feel relieved, but instead you feel⊠a little sick.
By Friday, you start catching him staring. Not the playful stares he used to throw when you were snarking at him on the couch, or the amused glances during group study when you used to roast Seiko. These are different. Sharper. Tight-lipped. Like heâs trying to understand what the fuck your problem is and fighting the urge to demand answers. In the library, he walks in with two friends and pauses when he sees you sitting alone. For a second, your eyes lock. Your heart jumps. You go cold. He raises his brows just a littleâlike a challenge. Like heâs asking, So this is how it is now?
You immediately lower your gaze to your textbook.
You donât look up again until you hear him walk away.
You tell yourself itâs fine.
You know the creak of every floorboard by now. You time your kitchen runs for when he's in the shower. You fake calls on the walk home if heâs in the distance across campus. Youâve perfected the art of silenceâof vanishing just before your name could leave his mouth.
Youâre not proud of it. But you're not ready to talk either. Every time you see himâor almost see himâyour stomach knots. Itâs not just the fact that you had sex with your best friendâs older brother. Itâs the fact that it meant something. At least to you. And now you donât know if it did to him.
You donât know what he thinks. You donât know if he regrets it. You donât know if he wants to do it again or pretend it never happened. You donât know anything, and not knowing feels safer than asking. You avoid the kitchen unless Seikoâs there. You donât ride in Suguruâs car anymore. You take the campus loop busâeven if itâs late, even if itâs raining, even if the seats are soaked and the heater doesnât work. At least it keeps you away from him.
Every day, you pretend like you're fine.
âWhy do you always look like youâre about to throw up when I mention Satoru?â Seiko teases lightly one afternoon when youâre curled up on the couch scrolling on your phone. You blink too quickly. âI do not,â you lie. âYeah, you do,â she laughs, âlike, every time. Are you two fighting or something?â You force a smile, heart thumping. âI just find him annoying. You know that.â She shrugs, unconvinced. âOkay, but you used to like him annoying. Now you look like youâre allergic to him.â
By Saturday, the tension is visible. Even Seikoâs starting to pick up on itâon how quiet Satoruâs become, how he doesnât crack jokes like he used to, how the apartment suddenly feels like it has an emotional landmine buried under the carpet. And heâs not being subtle either. He slams more drawers. Leaves the fridge open longer than needed. One morning, you hear him mutter, âSheâs literally acting like I murdered her family,â through the wall after you ducked out of the bathroom the second he walked in.
You curl into yourself. Guilt swarms you. Guilt for sleeping with him. Guilt for liking it. Guilt for making it weird. Guilt for hiding it. Guilt for lying to Seiko. Guilt for how you canât look either of them in the eye anymore.
And the worst part?
You miss him. You miss the sound of his dumb laugh from the couch. The way he stole your fries off your plate. The smug smirk he gave when he caught you staring. You miss him when he's in the same room, and you miss him when he's not. But you're too afraid to fix it.
Too afraid of what it could become. Or worseâwhat it wonât.
Itâs Sunday evening when it finally happens. Youâd just gotten out of the shower, damp hair sticking to your neck, hoodie slipping too far off one shoulder. Youâre halfway through towel-drying it in your room when you hear the unmistakable sound of the front door swinging shut and keys being dumped into the ceramic bowl by the entryway.
And your stomach sinks. You know who it is.
You freeze, listening. Itâs lateâSeikoâs staying at a friendâs dorm tonight, which means itâs just you. And him. In the apartment. Your heart starts to thump like a speaker at a frat houseâdeep, rhythmic, inescapable. You think maybe if you stay quiet, if you keep your lights off, if you just wait it out, heâll go straight to his room.
But thenâ
Knock. Knock. Knock. Three sharp, deliberate knocks against your door. Not frantic. Not tentative. Just controlled. Frustrated. You squeeze your eyes shut.
âOpen the door,â he says through it. Calm. But not neutral. Thereâs heat simmering just beneath it. You donât move. Another knock.
âI know youâre in there.â
A pause.
âAnd I know youâre avoiding me.â
You grit your teeth, lips parting. For a second, you contemplate telling him to fuck off. But you canât bring yourself to say itânot when your whole body still remembers his touch, his voice in your ear, the way heâd held your hips like he couldnât get enough of you. âIâm not,â you lie weakly, and it sounds like youâre underwater. A dry laugh.
âRight. Youâre not.â
You stand frozen for a moment longer before your body acts for you. Fingers wrapping around the doorknob, turning it slowly until the latch clicks. You pull it open just enough to see himâhis hoodie slung low over his head, eyes darker than usual, like the week of silence has worn down even his confidence. Thereâs a long silence. You shift your weight from one foot to the other.Â
âLook, IâI donât think we should talk about it, okay?â you mumble, eyes flicking away. âIt was a party. We were drunk. It happened. Letâs just⊠not make it a big deal.â
His jaw flexes.
âYou think Iâm making it a big deal?â
You flinch. âArenât you?â
âNo,â he says, stepping forward, his voice dipping lower. âYouâre the one pretending it didnât happen. Youâre the one whoâs been acting like I donât fucking exist.â
You glance back toward the darkened hallway, heart pounding.
âIâve just been busy, Satoru.â
âCut the shit.â
His voice is low but harsh now, the syllables snapping through the space between you.
âI text you, you leave me to read. You see me on campus, and you bolt like Iâm some fucking stalker. You wonât even look at me. What the hell did I do that was so wrong?â
Your throat tightens.
âItâs notâitâs not about what you did,â you say quickly, voice cracking.
He stares at you like he doesnât believe you.
âI justââ You hesitate. âI donât know what that was, okay? I donât know what it meant.â
His eyes narrow. âWhy does it have to mean something?â
You blink. âBecause it does.â
The words come out louder than you meant.
And then itâs quiet. Heavy.
You suddenly feel very, very tired.
âI justâŠâ You swallow. âItâs hard. Youâre Seikoâs brother. And youâre you. Youâre, like, Satoru fucking Gojo. And Iâm justâme. And I donât want to be some⊠joke you tell your frat friends later.â
His face tightens.
âIs that what you think this is?â
You flinch. He takes a step forward.
âYou think Iâd fuck you in a bathroom at a party and then just go brag about it to Suguru or some shit?â
âI donât know!â you snap, voice cracking. âI donât know what the fuck to think!â
You feel it bubbling up nowâhot, sharp, impossible to contain. A weekâs worth of bottled-up emotion, self-doubt, mortification, and frustration bleeding into your voice.
âIâve liked you since I was seventeen and you used to sneak Red Bulls during our tutoring breaks at your guysâ houseâI didnât even like Red Bull, by the wayâand now weâre living in the same fucking apartment, and youâve seen me in my pajamas and kissed me like you were starving for it and then we had sex, and then I had to wake up the next morning pretending it didnât make my whole world tilt sideways!â
Your breath comes out shaky, chest heaving now.
âAnd youâGod,â you choke out, eyes stinging, âyou said nothing the next morning. Not even, like, a normal-person âare you okayâ or âhey, about last night.â No. You made some dumbass joke about not knowing theyâd have spin the bottle at the partyâlike that was the most significant thing that happened!â
You throw your hands up, exasperated and hurt all over again.
âAnd I just stood there like an idiot, laughing it off, because I didnât know if it was casual for you or if I meant nothing, and meanwhile I spent the whole week overanalyzing every single second while you probably just carried on like it was any other night!â Satoru is silent. Frozen. Jaw clenched, shoulders stiff, eyes locked on you like he canât believe youâve been holding all of this inside. That youâve been carrying it around like this pain belonged only to you.
âI felt like a fucking joke, Satoru,â you say quieter now, voice trembling. âAnd I didnât know if I was allowed to be hurt. I didnât know if I was overreacting. So I did the only thing I could doâI avoided you. Because if I didnât, I think I wouldâve cried or worseâtold you I still wanted you, even if you didnât feel the same.â The air between you two is thick with everything thatâs been left unsaid. He takes a slow step forward, and when he speaks, his voice is hoarseâreal. âI didnât know what the fuck to say,â he admits. âI woke up and I panicked. I thought if I made it casual, youâd feel like you had an easy out. Like it wouldnât be weird for you.â You look up at him, throat tight. âYeah?â you say bitterly. âWell, it was.â
âI know,â he says, wincing. âI know. And Iâm sorry.â A pause. You donât move. âI didnât mean to make you feel like that,â he adds quietly. âI was trying to be cool about it, and I ended up being a complete fucking idiot.â You say nothing. He sighs.
âI shouldâve just said I liked kissing you,â he says simply. âBecause I did. I liked it too much, and it freaked me out.â You blink hard. Your lips part, but the words donât come. He takes another step closer. âYou werenât a one-night thing,â he says, voice low. âYouâre not a joke. You never have been.â A breathless silence. Your heart is pounding againâbut for a different reason now. âSo, weâre good now?,â he asks lightly. You manage a small smile. âYeah.â
Another beat passes, and then his voice drops againâquiet, careful. âCan we stop pretending it didnât happen?â You take a breath. Your fingers curl into the fabric of your hoodie. Your skin feels hot. You nod. âYeah,â you whisper. âOkay.â
He smilesâslow, crooked, a little relieved.
âCool,â he murmurs, stepping past you with a brush of his fingers at your hip. âNow come out and eat. Youâve been emo all week.â
âDonât call me emo,â you groan.
âDonât ghost me, then.â You pause in the doorway, watching as he disappears into the kitchen. And despite the pounding in your chest, for the first time in days, something eases in your shoulders.
â
It starts off subtle. A shoulder bump in the kitchen. His fingers brushing yours when he passes the remote. You stealing sips from his drink even though you said you didnât want one. But over the last few weeks, itâs become undeniable. You and Satoru have gotten so close. Not in the subtle, barely-speaking, âare-they-even-on-good-termsâ way you were for that agonizing, slow, emotionally repressed stretch of timeâbut in the obnoxiously familiar, joyfully flirty, constantly-hovering-near-each-other way that screams something happened, and theyâre definitely doing it again. Thereâs no dramatic sit-down. No DTR talk. But itâs in everything you do. Itâs the way he stretches out across the couch just so his legs rest over your lap when Seikoâs watching TV next to you, unfazed. The way you lean into him during group hangouts, like heâs a magnetic pull you donât even fight anymore. Today, itâs the three of you againâSeiko, you, and Satoruâon a sunny late afternoon, draped across the living room in varying states of half-productivity and snack-crunching. He has his head dangerously close to your thigh on the couch, while he himself is sprawled across on it, flipping through something on his phone, one hand absentmindedly fiddling with the hem of your hoodie. Youâre seated with your legs crossed, scrolling through TikTok and trying not to smile every time his ivory hair glints in the afternoon sunlight.Â
Seikoâs half-watching a show but keeps glancing, suspicious.
âOkay,â she says suddenly, pointing her spoon at the both of you, âI swear to God you two were being emo little freaks like two weeks ago.â
You blink. âHuh?â
âDonât âhuhâ me,â she says, narrowing her eyes. âYou literally wouldnât even look at each other at breakfast, and now youâre basically spooning on the couch like thatâs normal.â Satoru doesnât look up. âI am a very cuddly person,â he says, flipping to the next Instagram story. You nudge him in the side with your foot. âHe is not,â you tell Seiko, grinning. âI was gaslit,â she says. âYou both made me think I was imagining the tension.â
âYou were,â you and Satoru say at the same time. Then you both glance at each other and immediately start cracking up. âUnbelievable,â Seiko mutters, digging her spoon back into her cereal. âI shouldâve known when he voluntarily washed a dish that something was up.â Satoru reaches up and steals a spoonful of cereal straight out of her bowl. âHey!â she swats at him, âGet your own! Donât touch my food, you asshole.â The rest of the day is just like thatâsubtle teasing, casual touches, too-long eye contact that gives everything away. When he gets up to grab snacks, he asks if you want anything with this easy, domestic sort of confidence. When you hand him your phone to look at a meme, his fingers graze yours on purpose. And when you walk back from the kitchen later, he slides over on the couch without a word, making space for you in that casual, of course youâll sit here next to me kind of way. At one point, youâre both squished together, sharing the same blanket, knees knocking under itâand Seiko just stares.
She mutters, âIâm living in hell.â You and Satoru both just grin.Â
â
You had the apartment to yourself.
Lectures had moved online because of some water damage in the psych building, so you were living the absolute dream: cozy hoodie, panties, blanket burrito, Modern Family playing at low volume, and a warm mug of tea in your hands. It was gray outsideâlight drizzle tapping at the windowsâand you had zero plans to leave the couch bed you made in your room. That was, until you hear the apartment door slam shut. You freeze. Itâs too early for Seiko to be back. And she wouldâve yelled something dumb the second she walked in. Which meansâ
âYo,â Satoru calls out, voice echoing down the hallway.
Shit.
You panic for half a second, adjusting your blanket like youâve been caught watching porn instead of a sitcom. âIâm in my room!â you shout back, hoping he takes the hint. He doesnât. Your door creaks open without hesitation, and you barely sit up before heâs leaning against the frame, one brow cocked, his stupidly gorgeous face framed by the light behind him.Â
âSeriously?â you groan. âEver heard of knocking? What if I was changing and I was naked?â He just grins, blue eyes flickering over youâmessy hair, oversized hoodie, bare thighs, popcorn-stained blanket and all. âI've already been inside you,â he shrugs casually, stepping in like itâs his room. âWhatâs the difference, really?â Your mouth drops open. âSatoruâ!âHe plops down beside you before you can finish, laughing to himself as you bury your face in the blanket in mortified silence. âYouâre unbelievable,â you mumble, trying to will away the heat crawling up your neck. He nudges your leg with his knee under the blanket. âSo whatâre we watching, sweetheart?â
You hesitate, because saying Modern Family out loud just feels embarrassing now. â...Modern Family.â Satoru squints at you, unimpressed. âAgain? Youâve seen every episode like twelve times.â
You turn to face him, making a point of shoving popcorn in your mouth like itâll shut him up. âAnd? Itâs comfort TV. Sue me.â But he doesnât argue. He just shifts lower, stealing a handful of popcorn and tossing a few pieces into his mouth while kicking his shoes off. You watch him stretch out beside you, long limbs taking up all the space, thigh pressing up against yours under the blanket. He doesnât say anything about it, and neither do you. Not until his hand slips under the blanketâjust resting on your bare thigh this time, warm and casual, but very much intentional. You shoot him a look. âSeriously?â
âWhat?â he murmurs, not even glancing over. âItâs cold. Youâre warm. Let me live.â
âYour hand is on my skin.â
His lips twitch like heâs trying not to smile. âOh, is that what that is?â You elbow him lightly, but it doesnât make him move. If anything, he just sinks further into your side, his knuckles brushing slow, lazy circles against your thigh like he knows exactly what he's doing. Whichâof course he does. âYouâre the worst,â you mutter.
âIâm your worst,â he says, soft and teasing. You swallow. The blanket suddenly feels a little too warm. A long moment passes with the two of you just⊠lying there. Watching Cam and Mitch bumble through fatherhood while Satoruâs fingers trace delicate lines higher and higher on your leg, never quite crossing the line, but dancing at the edge of it. Heâs so casual about itâlike this is normal now. Like itâs his right to touch you, to be here, stretched out in your bed and smirking at you like youâre already his. But this time, he leans in and kisses your jawâsoft, slow, and maddeningly smugâyou donât pull away. Youâre kind of surprised, you didnât think heâd just⊠do that. Your face is still warm from his jaw kiss, but you tryâtryâto keep your attention on the TV. Itâs useless. You can feel him watching you now, feel the soft trail of his fingers inching up your thigh again beneath the blanket. Barely touching. Barely even real. âYouâre nervous,â he says quietly, amused. âDonât like me touching you?â He hums playfully, squeezing your thigh.
âNo, Iâm not,â you mutter, not meeting his eyes.
âYou are,â he insists, voice dropping. âYouâre so twitchy. What, am I distracting?â You glare at him, but he just grins.
âGod, youâre annoying.âÂ
He leans closer, chin resting on your shoulder, lips right by your ear. âYou didnât think I was annoying when you were moaning my name in that bathroom.â You freeze, body going still all at once. Then you punch him weakly in the arm, because what the fuck is he even trying to do right now. âThat was so unnecessary.â
âWas it?â he hums. ââCause you sound a little breathless right now.â You hate him. You do. Especially when his hand starts tracing the hem of your oversized hoodie, pushing it up so slowly your brain short-circuits. Itâs featherlight, like heâs giving you time to stop him. You donât. Instead, you clutch the blanket tighter as his fingers drag higher up your thigh, brushing over the edge of your underwear like heâs not doing anything at all. âSatoru,â you whisper, a warningâor a plea, youâre not sure. His mouth is back at your ear. âMm, I love when you say it like that.â Then, casually, he lifts the blanket and looks. You panic. âHeyâ!â But heâs smirking now, pupils darker, lips parted a little as he eyes your bare legs, the little black cotton panties with a small lace trim that were not meant for an audience today. âCute,â he murmurs, like heâs impressed, like you planned this. âDidnât take you for a lace girl.â
âI didnât ask for commentary.â you whisper-shout, trying to tug the blanket back downâbut he catches your wrist. His other hand slides fully under your hoodie now, across your stomach, warm and flat, and you whimper when his thumb brushes just under the band of your underwear. You shouldnât let him. You really shouldnât. But his voice is so low, so goddamn casual, as he says: âWant me to help you relax?â Your breath stutters. He shifts closer, practically between your legs now, his face inches from yours, and that cocky smirk is goneâreplaced by something slower. Hungrier. His hand cups your jaw, tilting your face toward him, and your eyes flutter shut because this is so bad, but you donât want him to stop.
And thenâ
You feel his fingers press down through the fabric, right against your core. You gasp, one hand flying to his chest like you could push him awayâbut you donât. You curl your fingers into his hoodie instead.Â
âStill watching Modern Family?â he whispers, like itâs a joke, like heâs not circling you over your underwear with unbearable gentleness. âYouâre the worst person alive,â you hiss. âMm, maybe,â he murmurs, lips grazing your cheek. âBut Iâm making you feel so good right now, arenât I?â You donât answer. You canâtânot when heâs pressing a little harder, rubbing small, unhurried circles into your clit above your panties, and watching your face like he wants to memorize it. And thenâthenâhe moves down. You squeak, trying to grab at him, but he pins your hips with both hands and laughs into your stomach, breath hot against your skin as he pulls your underwear to the side.
âRelax,â he says again, and this time itâs softer. âLet me take care of you.â You suck in a breath, the kind that gets trapped in your throat and goes nowhere. He has your thighs spread, his palms anchoring them down to the mattress as he looks at youâreally looks at youâwith that ravenous kind of amusement. âYouâre shaking,â he murmurs against your hipbone, lips brushing it like an afterthought. âNo, Iâm not,â you breathe, even though you definitely are. One slow kiss, then another, lower now, until youâre arching just a little, just enough. You try to close your legs, try to pull the hoodie back down, try anything to regain a sliver of controlâbut his hands just tighten around your thighs, keeping you right where he wants you. âSettle down,â he says again, voice dropped to something filthy.Â
âGod, you're always so wound up. Gonna eat that pussy so good youâll become nice ân easy fâme.â And then you feel him lick a stripe up your inner thigh. Your whole body jolts like itâs been electrocuted.
âSatoruââ
âShh,â he says, almost absentmindedly, like heâs focused. Like heâs thinking about what heâs going to do to you and not much else. His fingers trail back up, slow, pushing your hoodie higher, letting his knuckles brush your ribs. He mouths at your skin the whole way upâyour stomach, your side, your breasts, paying extra attention to your hardened nipplesâbefore dragging himself back down again with that same dizzying patience. "You're not stopping me," he murmurs, breath ghosting over your soaked underwear. âSo either you really want me to behave badly or you're just shy about asking.â You cover your face with one hand. âOh my god.â
 He chuckles, dragging his tongue over your inner thigh again. âThatâs not a no.â And then he finallyâfinallyâslips your underwear to the side and drags a single, long finger through your folds. You gaspâloudly this timeâand his grip on your thigh tightens.
âFuck,â he whispers, almost reverent. âYouâre so wet.â
You canât respond. You canât even think. He takes his time, thumb pressing against your clit as his fingers prod at your entrance gently, teasing, but not thrusting them in. And then his mouth replaces his fingers. You cry outâlike, actually cry outâas he licks you, slow and indulgent, like he's tasting dessert. One of his hands stays on your thigh, firm and possessive, and the other slips up to squeeze your waist, your breast, anything he can reach. And his mouthâgod, his mouth moves in unhurried circles, like heâs savoring it, like he missed this. He drags his tongue up, swirling around your sensitive bundle of nerves, giving it a little suck, before dragging his tongue down to circle against your entrance torturously. Youâre squirming again. But this time, he lets you. âYeah,â he murmurs between licks, âthatâs more like it. You sound so sweet when you stop pretending you donât want me.â You bite your knuckle to keep quiet, but he catches your hand and pulls it away. âLet me hear you,â he says, more serious now. âI want you to be loud for me.âAnd thenâhe uses his fingers too. He slips one inside, knuckle deep as he pumps it in and out, adding a second one when he hears you whine his name.Â
âThatâs it, baby.âÂ
You writhe, head falling back into the pillows, one arm flung over your eyes as he builds you up with an obscene kind of precisionâhis tongue, his fingers, the soft praise he keeps murmuring in between. âYouâre doing so good for me.â He harshly sucks at your clit again, all while his fingers are pistoning in and out of you, causing you to clamp down. âFeel how hard youâre clenching?â You're dripping. Youâre trembling. You're seconds away from falling apart, and he knows it. But he slows down. You whine, hips rocking. âSatoruââ
He pulls back just a little, breath warm against your thigh. âSay it.â
âSay what?â
âWhat you want.â You blink at him, dazed. "You're literallyâinside meâ"
He grins. âStill. Say it.â Your face burns, but your voice is desperate now. âPlease.â
âPlease what?â
âSatoru,â you choke, âplease donât stop eating me out.â And he doesnât. He keeps going until you fall apart for him, loud and shaking and so far gone that the only word on your lips is his name. You come, his name falling off your lips like a mantra while he continues licking and slurping until you quite literally yank his head off from between your thighs. And even thenâhe doesnât move. He kisses you once, soft and slow, like heâs easing you back into your body. Then again, higher up this time, then again, like he canât quite stop. Your hoodie is bunched under your arms. Your thighs are limp. Your bodyâs still tremblingâsoft and flushed and pliantâwhen he presses a kiss just below your navel and murmurs, âTold you Iâd take care of you.â You barely manage to lift your head. âI hate you.â He grins against your skin. âLiar.â You want to respond. You do. But then heâs kissing his way up, slow and lazy, nudging your hoodie higher until it bunches just above your tits. You whimper into his mouth as he moves up to kiss you again, deeper this time, and while youâre distractedâdazed and gaspingâhe grabs your thighs and pulls them apart, slotting himself between them like itâs his god-given right. His hands palm at your breasts lazily, grinning when he feels you buck your hips against the bulge in his sweats, canines out on display as he grins down at you. âSatoru,â you breathe, but he just smiles.
âRound two, baby.âÂ
Youâre still in your hoodie and pantiesâjust tugged out of placeâand he doesnât bother taking them off. Instead, he hooks his fingers into the band and pushes them aside again like itâs easy, like itâs familiar now. And then heâs grinding down against you, hard and slow, through his sweats, and you moan so loudly he laughs. âYou that sensitive already?â he teases, rolling his hips again. âShitâlook at you. Still twitching.âÂ
âShut up.â
âNo,â he purrs, dragging the tip of his nose along your jaw. âNot when youâre soaking through your panties like that. You think Iâm gonna shut up now?â You try to glare at him. It fails. He grabs your hand, his plush bottom lip between his teeth, white lashes fluttering when you take the hint and squeeze him through his sweats.
âMmfâ Not that Iâm pressuring you or anything, but sweets I need youââ
âYou are not pressuring me, so please, hurry up before I genuinely explode.â
âWow, so eager for me. Having my tongue in you wasnât enough?â
âJust put it in already before I punch youââ
âFine! But I donât have condoms on me right now, used the last one up to fuck you on that sink, remember?â
âI donât care, Iâm on birth control anywaysââ
Then heâs pushing his sweats down just enough, lining himself upâand you gasp, grabbing his shoulders as he slides in so slowly you think you might cry. He hisses through his teeth. âFuckâstill so tight. Like youâre trying to squeeze me out.â
âMaybe I am.â
He laughs again, shaky and breathless. âToo bad. Iâm not going anywhere. Other than this pussy.â He sets a rhythmâslow at first, deep and dragging, rocking into you like he wants to take his timeâbut the moment your nails dig into his back and your breath hitches, he growls and picks up pace. His mouth is everywhereâyour throat, your collarbone, your lipsâand all the while heâs muttering filth against your skin:
âYou feel that? How good I fill you up?â
âBet youâve been thinking about this all week, huh?â
âSay my name again. Câmon, baby. Say it while I fuck you.â You do. Over and over. At some point, he shiftsâsits back on his heels and pulls you with him, dragging your hips into his lap. The new angle makes your vision blur. âOh my godâSatoruââ âThere she is,â he groans, watching where your bodies meet, sweat-slick hair falling over his forehead. âSo fucking pretty like this. Gonna come again for me?â You nod helplessly. He just grins and thrusts harder. And when you fall apart a second timeâloud and breathless and clinging to him like youâll never let goâhe follows with a broken moan, burying his face in your neck as he shudders and pulses inside you, the warmth seeping from his cock making you shudder. For a long moment, thereâs only your breathing. Then, finally, he flops onto the bed beside you, tugs you into his chest, and says, âSo⊠no head?â You groan. He laughs. And somewhere beneath the covers, his hand is already sliding down your thigh again.
âRound three?â he says, hopeful.
You smack him with a pillow.
He still ends up getting round three.
And then round four.
And then round five, until you both are so exhausted and sweaty that he almost falls asleep instead of getting up to wipe the copious amounts of him trickling out onto your thighs. Once youâre cleaned up, he flops next to you dramatically, limbs sprawled across the bed like a starfish, chest rising and falling. âIâm the love of your life,â he murmurs, trailing a lazy hand across your stomach. âYou just donât wanna admit it yet.â
âBold of you to assume Iâm not filing a restraining order first thing tomorrow.â He fake gasps, curling into you like you mortally wounded him. âYouâre evil.âÂ
You hum, carding your fingers through his hair. âAnd youâre much more evil than me.â
âAnd yet.â He kisses your shoulder. âYou let me hit five rounds.â You shove him again, but itâs gentle this time. Less of a shove, more of a pat. He takes it as an invitation to climb on top of you, settling there like a smug human blanket. âYouâre heavy,â you complain, breath catching when his nose brushes yours. âYouâre soft,â he says, grinning. You smack his arm again, and he laughs like this is the happiest heâs ever beenâlike lying half-naked on you, sweaty and spent, is the best part of his day.Â
âHey,â he says after a moment, quieter now, eyes still a little mischievous but softer at the edges. âI meant it, yâknow. Earlier.â
âMeant what?â
âThat I wanna take care of you.âÂ
Your breath hitches. He kisses your forehead like heâs sealing a promise. âNot just when Iâm being disgusting.â You look up at himâthis boy with starlight in his eyes and trouble in his grinâand your chest does a weird little flip. âOkay,â you whisper. âOkay,â he echoes, and grins so wide it hurts. âBut just to clarify, I am still gonna be disgusting.â Heâs tracing shapes on your back with lazy fingers. Random squiggles, probably. Or maybe dicks. Itâs Satoruâyou can never be sure. But then he pauses. And says, softly, âIâm serious though.âÂ
You blink against his skin. âAbout being disgusting? Yeah, we all know.â He chuckles, but itâs a breath short of his usual dramatics. âNo,â he says, thumb brushing the curve of your waist. âAbout you. About this.â Your heart stutters, because the air suddenly shiftsâgoes tender and quiet and a little fragile. You pull back just enough to see his face. Heâs looking at you. Not in the way he usually doesâlike youâre a puzzle he already knows how to solve, or a joke heâs waiting for you to get. Heâs just looking. Like youâre real. Like youâre his.
âSatoruâŠâ
âI like you,â he says, simple as anything. âLike, actually. Not just because youâre hot and Iâve seen your underwear drawer, totally on accident, I came to drop your take out in your roomâalthough, bonus.âÂ
You huff a laugh. âWow. Youâre really bad at this.â
âIâm being vulnerable, asshole.â You grin despite yourself, heart pounding. âSorry. Continue.â He shifts, propping himself up on one elbow so he can look down at you, messy hair falling into his eyes. âI didnât mean for it to be like this,â he says, voice lower now. âDidnât think Iâd end up catching feelings for my little sisterâs best friend who constantly calls me a freak.â
âYou are a freak,â you murmur.
âRight, but now Iâm your freak.â You stare at him.Â
âSatoru.âÂ
He snorts. âOkay, fair. But Iâve been gone for three years, and then I come back and suddenly youâre all grown up and hot and stomping around the apartment like you donât even know what youâre doing to me.â You roll your eyes, but your cheeks are burning. âAnd then,â he continues, brushing his fingers along your cheek, âwe actually start talking again and youâre smart and annoying and make me laugh, and youâre just so perfect⊠Like, I genuinely cannot express it in words, and I was stupid to think that you were like a sister to me. Because you're really not. You're so, so far from that assumption of mine that I wanna write it out in an essay just to prove to you how badly I want you in the most romantic way possible and in the least sisterly way possible.â You blink. He looks down, lips twitching faintly. âAnd now Iâm totally fucked, because I donât not want you anymore. I just want this. You. Always.âÂ
You swallow, heart in your throat. âYou mean that?â
âDead serious.â He grins, but itâs gentler now. âUnless youâre about to reject me, in which case I was absolutely joking and this never happened.â You laugh, a real one this time, and you kiss him before he can keep talkingâsoft and lingering, your fingers curling in his hair. When you pull back, heâs staring at you with stars in his eyes. âOkay,â you whisper. âYou win. I like you too. A lot. But for clarification I always liked you in a very non brotherly way.â He raises an eyebrow. âSo⊠youâre saying Iâm your freak now?â You groan, burying your face in his chest. âRegret.âÂ
But his arms are already around you, holding you tight. âToo late,â he murmurs into your hair, smiling like he just got everything heâs ever wanted. âYouâre stuck with me.â You groan, dragging the blanket over your head. âGo to sleep, dickhead.â
âI will,â he says, pulling the blanket down to kiss you. âRight after I cuddle the love of my life.â
âGross.â
âYou like me.â
âI do not.â
âYou let me do unspeakable things to you thirty minutes ago.â
ââŠShut up.â
âLove of my liiiiiife.â
âSeikoâs gonna murder me.â
âSheâll have to kill me first.â You roll your eyes, but when he finally lays down properly, arm slung around your waist, legs tangled with yours, you realize you're smiling again. Like an idiot. A very, very satisfied idiot.
You wake up the next morning, tangled in Satoruâs arms and covered in way too many bite marks to explain away, whenâ
âHEYâhave you seen Satoruââ
The door bursts open. You jolt upright. Seiko stands frozen in the doorway, one hand still on the knob, her mouth dropping open in real-time. You barely get out a squeaky âWaitâ!â beforeâ
âOH MY GOD!â She SCREAMS, turns on her heel, and is sprinting down the hallway. You immediately start panicking. âSatoru. Satoru. Wake up. She sawâshe SAWâoh my god, weâre so done, sheâs gonna KILL MEââ
He groans and pulls the blanket back over his head like a child. âItâs fine.â
âItâs not fine, I fucked your sisterâs brother! WaitâI am your sisterâsâwhatever! Itâs over! Itâsââ
âRelax,â he says, tugging you back down to the bed effortlessly. âCâmere. If Iâm going to die today, I want to die cuddling.â
âYouâre insufferable.â
âMm,â he hums, nosing into your hair. âGood morning, girlfriend.â
âYouâre gonna make me throw up.â
âSpeaking of,â he murmurs, lips brushing your jaw, âany interest in morning sex? I feel like I didnât fully appreciate round four last night. Too much of my blood was in my ears.â You slap his chest. âYouâre not serious.â
âIâm so seriousââ
The door SLAMS open again.Â
âMY CHILDREN!â Suguruâs voice rings out, loud and unrepentant. âI WIN!âÂ
You both sit up in bed, tangled in sheets, wide-eyed. There stands Suguru, holding up a phone like a camcorder. Seiko is beside him, arms crossed and pouting like you just ruined her birthday.Â
âSuguru what the fuckââ
âSay hi to the camera!â he beams. âI bet Seiko fifty bucks you two would be together by the start of the month. Thank you for not making me lose money, I really needed this win.â
âSUGURU,â you yell, diving under the blanket like you can hide from your sins. âDELETE THAT RIGHT NOW.â
Seiko flops dramatically onto your bed like itâs her dignity thatâs been compromised. âCouldnât you have waited one more week to bang my brother? You had no self-control?â Satoru is laughing. Fully laughing, his head tipped back like this is the best morning of his life.
âWhy are you mad at her?â he asks Seiko. âIâm the one who did all theââ
âNOPE!â Seiko shouts, throwing a pillow at his face. âNope. Absolutely not. Iâm leaving.â
âLeaving with the footage,â Suguru smirks, zooming in. You lunge at him with a second pillow. âSUGURU I SWEAR TO GODââ Satoru just sighs contentedly, dragging you back into bed. âHonestly? This is better than morning sex.â
âYouâre the worst person alive.â He kisses your cheek. âLove you too, sweets.â
â
Dating Gojo Satoru is somehow exactly what you expected and also nothing like it at all.
Because yesâheâs still cocky. Still dramatic. Still flirts with you like itâs a sport and throws your shared laundry onto the fan when heâs bored. But he also brings you coffee before your 9AMs, lets you wear his hoodies even though he grumbles about you âstretching them out with your cute little shoulders,â and texts you things like âmissing u like crazy. come home and bully me đâ when youâre gone for more than three hours. Seiko, naturally, has not let you live. âI literally canât believe you,â she sighs one morning over brunch, watching you and Gojo bicker over who gets the last pancake like itâs her personal sitcom. âI brought him into this house and you betrayed me by falling for him.â You blink at her innocently. âTechnically I was in love with him before I moved in.â
âThatâs not helping your case.â
âSheâs gonna be your sister-in-law one day,â Satoru says with a grin, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. âYou should be happy.â
âIâm going to be sick,â she deadpans, sipping her coffee. âI donât know who disgusts me moreâyou for dating her, or her for dating you.â You and Satoru just exchange a look. Then you make out across the table.
Loudly. Seiko drops her fork.Â
âIâm leaving the country.â
Later That Week â Somewhere in His Car, 11:42 PM
Itâs a warm night. The kind that clings to your skin and makes the windows fog up, even though all youâre doing is eating ice cream in the backseat of Satoruâs ridiculous Lexus like teenagers who just discovered kissing. You're wearing one of his shirts. Heâs got his arm lazily around your shoulder, legs stretched out, cone half-melted in his hand. Music hums softly from the speakersâsome dreamy indie song he said reminded him of you once.
âI used to wear bras that were too big just because I thought you liked girls with big tits,â you say, out of nowhere.
He chokes.
âWhat?â
You shrug, licking your spoon. âYup. Used to stuff socks in them sometimes too. And I tried wearing eyeliner in like⊠freshman year. I looked like a raccoon. But I was like, âhe likes girls with winged liner.â So.â
Gojo is crying. Literal tears are in his eyes as he wheezes, âYou wore sock boobs for me?!â
âI was thirteen and stupidly in love with your furby looking ass,â you grumble, face burning. âNooo,â he says through laughter, clutching his stomach. âNo way. You were cosplaying as a B-cup for me??â
âI canât believe Iâm telling you this.â
âIâm honored. I feel chosen.â You roll your eyes, fake sulking. âAnd you didnât even notice. Wow.â He wipes his eyes, still smiling like a menace. âOkay but to be fair, I was like⊠what, seventeen? If I had noticed, it wouldâve been a little criminal.â
You groan. âFine, I guess youâre right.â He leans in, brushing his nose against yours. âBut I notice everything now.â You narrow your eyes. âSmooth.â
âDid it work?â You nod, slow. âYeah. Unfortunately.â You sit in silence for a second, ice cream long forgotten. His thumb grazes the side of your jaw as he looks at you like he already knows every version of youâthe teenage one with stuffed bras, the sarcastic college version who screamed at him in group projects, the current one whoâs still a little awkward when sheâs vulnerable but learning to let him in anyway. âYouâre my favorite person,â he says suddenly, like itâs the most obvious thing in the world. And you canât even pretend to be cool about it.
âGod,â you whisper, burying your face in his hoodie. âDonât make me cry while Iâm holding a fudge sundae.â He laughs, pulling you closer, arms wrapping fully around your waist. âNo promises,â he mumbles into your hair. âBut Iâve got napkins.â You kiss him, soft and unhurried. He tastes like vanilla. The windows fog up a little more. Somewhere in the distance, your phone buzzes. Probably Seiko texting a third reminder that you âbetter not be defiling her brother in public.â But you ignore it. Because for the first time in a long time, everything feels right. Just you, him, and a car that smells like waffle cones and warm cotton and a hundred what-ifs that have all finally, finally become yeses.
â
Bonus cause Iâm the worldâs best author or whatever
Five Years Later
Itâs a warm spring afternoon. The kind of day where the skyâs cloudless, the flowers look fake because theyâre so stupidly perfect, and everyone you love is slightly too drunk and happy. Youâre in white. Obviously. Satoruâs in a custom tux, sunglasses perched in his snow-white hair like he thinks heâs a celebrityâwhich, okay, fine, he kind of is, judging by the way your cousin nearly fainted when he winked at her. Your fingers are still linked as you sit at the wedding table, watching the crowd buzz with post-dinner energy. The string lights are glowing. Thereâs champagne in your glass. He keeps leaning over to kiss your shoulder because he âcanât help himself,â and you keep swatting him away because the photographer is still here, but youâre smiling like a fool.
And thenâ
âAlright, alright, everyone, shut upââ comes Seikoâs voice from the speakers. You both freeze. Satoru immediately grins. âOh god.âÂ
âSheâs giving her speech,â you whisper, gripping his knee.
âI should be scared,â he whispers back. âSheâs your best friend and my sister.âÂ
Up at the mic, Seiko clears her throat. She looks gorgeous, by the wayâan elegant dress, her ivory hair so similar to her brothers glinting underneath the lights, champagne in hand, and a very pointed expression on her face. âSo,â she says. âHi. Iâm Seiko. Iâm the brideâs best friend⊠and unfortunately, the groomâs younger sister.â
Laughter.Â
âI just wanna sayâwhen I was little, I always dreamed of giving a speech at my best friendâs wedding. But I definitely didnât think it would be this one.â More laughter. You bury your face in your hands. âLet me paint a picture,â she continues dramatically, starting to pace the stage like a stand-up comic. âItâs a regular Tuesday morning. I come out of my room, ready to microwave my sad breakfast. Iâm on my way to the kitchen, when I suddenly spot my brotherâs shoes and think, âHuh, why are Satoruâs shoes here, in front of (your name)âs room?â Because my brother wasnât supposed to be home. He had told me he was gonna be out with friends until the next morning. And his shoes sure as hell had never been outside my best friendâs room.â
Gojo groans next to you, forehead hitting the table.Â
âAnd I think, âOh no. Oh no no no.â So I walk down the hallway. I open her bedroom door. And what do I see?â
Seiko pauses. The crowd leans in. She lifts her glass. âMy brother,â she says, tone flat, âin my best friendâs bed.â
The room erupts.
Satoruâs face is in his hands. Youâre laughing so hard your shoulders shake. âI screamed,â Seiko says dramatically, over the noise. âShe screamed. He didnât scream, because the bastard was asleep. And then I lost fifty goddamn dollars to Suguru, who bet me theyâd get together before the end of the month.â Camera pans to Suguru in the crowd, smug as hell, arm around Seikoâs waist, raising his glass. â And now,â Seiko says, grinning, âIâm standing here giving this speech, engaged to the man who profited off their hookup, and forced to admit that... I guess love wins. Or whatever.â Laughter. Cheers. Satoru clutches your hand and kisses your knuckles. Seiko softens. Just a little. âBut in all seriousness,â she says, voice a bit shakier now, âyou two are it. The real thing. And Iâm so happy that my best friend is now officially my sister-in-lawâeven if I had to walk in on her mid afterglow to get here.â
Groans. Cheers. Chants of âSISTER-IN-LAW! SISTER-IN-LAW!â Youâre laughing through tears now, forehead pressed against Gojoâs. âI love you guys,â Seiko finishes, raising her glass high. âNow go make out or whatever. Itâs your wedding.â You blow your best friend a kiss, before leaning into your husband, his arm snaking around you to pull you to his chest.Â
âShe really brought up the bed thing,â you mumble against his chest. âShe absolutely did,â he murmurs, nose in your hair.
 âAnd the socks in the bra thing didnât get a shoutout? Unfair.â He laughs, holding you tighter. âMaybe weâll save that one for the ten-year vow renewal.â You tilt your head up. âThink weâll make it to ten years?â
 He smiles, wide and stupid and glowing. âWeâll make it to forever.âÂ
 You kiss him, slow and full of everything. And the lights twinkle above like theyâre cheering you on.
authors note: hi everyone! i hope u liked it LOL i sacrificed my sleep for this i hope it was worth it! i can finally prepare for my exams without the looming anxiety of posting this ^.^
whisper of the heart â a nerdjo fic
synopsis â after reading about a book series that mirrored everything youâd loved about a past favourite, you were thrilled to find it in your college library. the copies were oldâworn enough to still have checkout cardsâbut what caught your attention was the same set of initials, G.S., scrawled across nearly every one. the same G.S. who had filled the margins with sharp, thoughtful annotations. you couldnât stop yourself from thoroughly enjoying the silly little comments written in the margins, leaving your own notes alongside theirs. it wasnât until much later that you realised G.S. wasnât some long-gone bookworm. it was none other than the man you had sworn to hate. gojo satoru.
pairing â nerd! satoru x reader
genre â academic rivals to lovers
word countâ 32k (oops)
warnings â sexual content (unprotected sex), swearing, mentions of not eating, slight angst.
small playlist i listened to while writing
"You all can come and grab the papers nowâdo not ask me for any re-evaluations, the mark presented on the paper is your final markâ"
You barely listen. The professor could be reading a grocery list for all you care. Your focus is already on the stack of midterms in his hands, your heart pounding like a drum against your ribs.
The exam had been brutalâ200 marks, covering classical mechanics and electromagnetism, some of the toughest material in your Physics II course. Past students had called it a horror show, a midterm designed to crush dreams and expose weaknesses. It was weighted heavily in your final grade, which meant every single mark mattered. The room is filled with a tense hum, a mixture of eager whispers and anxious murmurs. Some students hesitate in their seats, mentally preparing themselves before facing their doom. But you? You don't wait. You weave through the aisles, manoeuvring past people, determined to be one of the first to grab your paper.
And, of course, Gojo is right behind you.
"Jeez, you could at least pretend to be patient," he muses, his tone dripping with amusement as he strolls lazily down the steps, hands shoved in the pockets of his hoodie. You roll your eyes. "Not all of us have the luxury of cruising through exams without trying."
"I do try," he says, flashing you a grin. "I try just enough." Before you can shoot back a response, you reach the professorâs desk. Professor Takeda raises an unimpressed brow as he sorts through the papers.
"You two again," he sighs. "Half my life as a professor has been spent watching you bicker."
"Don't be dramatic, sir," Gojo says smoothly, resting an elbow on the desk. "It's only been three years." Takeda shakes his head, muttering something under his breath about headaches before handing you your paper. You grab it without waiting, fingers slightly shaking as you flip it over.
98.
The relief rushes through you instantly, so strong you canât help the triumphant burst of excitement. "Ninety-eight!" you blurt out, beaming as you hug the paper to your chest. Itâs a damn near perfect score, and after all those sleepless nights, all those hours of grinding through problem setsâyou earned this. Gojo, still waiting for his turn, glances at you with an expression you canât quite place. His usual smirk is still there, but thereâs something elseâsomething quieter, almost thoughtful, before he smooths it over with his usual easy confidence.
Takeda hands him his paper. Gojo flips it over, barely reacting as he reads the number at the top.
"Ninety-five." Your grin widens.
"You mean I beat you?" You practically bounce on your heels. "Me? The one you said was âtoo uptightâ and needed to ârelax and accept second placeâ? Me?"
Gojo exhales through his nose, shaking his head, as he folds his paper out of your sight. "Don't get too cocky," he drawls, shoving the paper under his arm. "Itâs just three points."
"Three points above you."
"For now," he corrects smoothly, nudging your shoulder as he moves past you.
Itâs been this way since freshman year. You and Gojo had ended up in the same introductory physics course, and from the very first midterm, it was clear: you were the only two truly competing at the top of the class. But while you poured everything into studyingâlate nights, flashcards, equations scribbled on napkinsâGojo seemed to barely put in the effort. Heâd show up late to lectures, half-asleep in sweatpants, glasses slightly skewed, yet somehow still aced every exam. He never took notes, never stressed, never seemed to break a sweat. It drove you insane. Because no matter how hard you tried, how much effort you put inâhe was always right there with you. Sometimes ahead, sometimes just behind, but never far enough to ignore.
And worst of all? He made it look easy. By now, the entire physics department knew about your rivalry. Professors expected you to fight over test scores. Study groups would take bets on who would score higher. Even during practical lab sessions, it was always a silent battleâwho could get through the calculations faster, who could figure out the trick questions first. You hated him. And now, after years of this, you finally had something over him. A small, almost imperceptible shift in the universe.
You beat Gojo Satoru. As soon as class ends, youâre practically floating out of the lecture hall, midterm still clutched in your hands. The second you step into the cafeteria, your eyes scan the room for your friend, and when you finally spot her at your usual table, you donât even bother with a greeting. âI got a ninety-eight,â you announce, sliding into the seat across from her with an undeniably smug grin. âAnd I beat Gojo.â
Her head snaps up from her laptop. âWaitâ Gojo Gojo?â
You roll your eyes. âAs opposed to what? Some other Gojo in our department?â
âOh my God, you actually did it?â she gasps, setting her drink down as she stares at you in something close to awe. âI thought that man was unstoppable.â
âWell, turns out heâs not.â You lean back in your chair, stretching your arms above your head. âGuess he finally met his match.â Your friend is still blinking at you in disbelief when a voice cuts in from behind you, slow and amused.
âOne good score, and you think youâre the shit.â You freeze. Then, before you can even turn around, Gojo is already there, stepping up behind you like a shadow that refuses to be ignored. You feel the presence of himâtall, lazy, entirely too smugâbefore you even lift your head to meet his gaze. Heâs leaning in just slightly, close enough to loom, his hands shoved into the pockets of his hoodie. That familiar, insufferable smirk is plastered on his face, condescending and infuriatingly amused.
You huff. âCanât a girl enjoy her victory in peace?âÂ
He tilts his head, that same damned smirk never wavering. âVictory?â he echoes, voice dripping with mockery. âYouâre getting ahead of yourself, arenât you? One midterm doesnât erase three years of domination.â You scoff, crossing your arms. âOh, please. Like youâve actually dominated me.â
âOh, you want me to bring out the stats?â Gojo hums, slipping into the seat beside you like he owns the place. He props his elbow on the table, resting his cheek on his palm as he begins, âPhysics I finalâ97 to your 96. Thermodynamics midterm? 95 to your 91. Electromagnetic Fields examââ
You groan. âJesus Christ, you memorized all of them?â
âYou think I donât keep track?â He arches a brow, eyes glinting with amusement. âItâs not my fault I have a consistent history of kicking your ass.â
Your friend snorts into her drink. âHe kinda has a pointââ
You shoot her a glare. Gojo, meanwhile, is clearly having the time of his life. He leans in, that imposing height of his making his presence impossible to ignore, his voice dropping just slightly, almost teasing. âBut sure,â he drawls, chin resting in his hand. âEnjoy your one win, (name). Iâll let you have it.â
You grip your cup so tightly the plastic crinkles. âLet me have it?â
âMmm.â He tilts his head, looking entirely too pleased with himself. âWouldnât want you to cry when I obliterate you on the final.â Your friend nudges you under the table, mouthing heâs so full of shit, but you barely register itâbecause the air between you and Gojo is charged in a way that makes your stomach twist. You wonât admit it out loud, but part of you wondersâ is this how he always talks to you?
So close, so taunting, like he enjoys watching you bristle. You hate how natural it feels, how effortless the rhythm of your bickering has become. But more than anything, you hate the way your heart stutters when he pushes himself out of his chair, hands still stuffed in his pockets, and grins down at you like he already knows how the next round of this fight is going to end.
âYou should really start studying,â he hums, walking backward toward the exit. âYouâll need it.â And with that, heâs gone, leaving you fuming at the table. Your friend watches him go, eyebrows raised. âSo, uh,â she says slowly. âAre we sure you guys arenât flirting?â You glare at her.
âI hate him.â She smirks. âMhm.â You seethe a little, realisingâwith a stab of annoyanceâthat yes, that motherfucker is actually leading right now in terms of grades and rankings. Itâs not even about the marks. Okay, maybe itâs a little about the marks. But youâve always been the smart woman in your course. The one who professors hold up as an example. The one whose name has been printed on merit lists and whose email is always flooded with internship offers and research opportunities. Youâve spent years perfecting your academic standing, earning every achievement through sheer effort and discipline. But for some odd reason, none of it ever seems to matter until youâve compared it with Gojo Satoru. You glare at his name on the leaderboard, one place ahead of yours. A single midterm shouldnât be enough to infuriate you, and yetâ
Your eye twitches. How the hell did you even get here?
Well.
Actually.
You know how. You just try not to think about it because, frankly, itâs one of the most mortifying moments of your entire academic career.
â
It was the very first week of freshman year, and you were, for lack of a better term, an insufferable know-it-all. Not in a bad wayâokay, maybe in a slightly bad way. But it wasnât your fault that you took your education seriously, or that you actually read ahead in your courses, or that you genuinely cared about learning. If anything, you were doing everyone a service by answering questions when no one else raised their hands. So, on that particular day, when your physics professor asked the class a question about vector components, you barely hesitated before speaking up.
âThe perpendicular components of a vector are independent of each other,â youâd answered smoothly, sitting up a little straighter as you prepared to elaborate. âThatâs why we can analyse them separately usingââ
âOhhh, wow,â someone cut in, voice dripping with mock wonder. âLook at that. We got a genius in the house.â The interruption had been so unexpectedâso audaciousâthat it completely derailed your train of thought.
And when you turned around, irritated beyond belief, there he was. White hair, round glasses perched on the bridge of his nose, an undeniably punchable smirk tugging at his lips. You had no idea who he was at the time. Just some tall, obnoxious guy slouched lazily in his seat, all limbs and arrogance, tapping a pen idly against his notebook as he stared at you with barely concealed amusement.
Your brows furrowed. âExcuse me?â
âIâm just saying,â he shrugged, âyou must be so fun at parties.â The class chuckled. Your jaw clenched. âWell, someone has to answer when no one else even tries.â
âRight, because weâre all just too stupid to understand vectors,â he drawled, stretching lazily in his seat.
âI didnât say that,â you shot back.
âDidnât have to,â he grinned, tapping his temple. âI could feel the superiority radiating from you.â You exhaled sharply through your nose, forcing yourself to turn back around before you said something that would get you in trouble on the first week of class.
âOkay, okay,â your professor cut in, looking thoroughly unbothered by the exchange. âLetâs keep the debating to actual physics concepts.â That should have been the end of it. But then you heard a low tsk from behind you.
âI bet she memorized the textbook cover to cover before the semester even started,â the white-haired menace mused under his breath to his friend with the long, black haired locks, who seemed disinterested in what his friend had to say.
You whipped around. âI did notââ
âDonât lie, nerd.â
âExcuse me?!â The class chuckled again. And when you shot a glare toward your professor, expecting some kind of reprimand, he just sighed and muttered, âGod, I already know you two are going to be a pain in my ass.â From that moment on, it had been war.
Your first set of midterms was when you realized he wasnât just talk. You walked into class with a 97 on your physics exam, feeling confidentâonly to glance over and see Gojo slouched in his seat, grinning as he casually flipped his test paper over to show a 99. He made eye contact with you as he tapped his fingers against the big red number. You nearly broke your pen in half.
And so it began.
Every exam, every assignment, every single class discussion became a battleground. You would argue over formulas, nitpick each otherâs solutions, and constantly try to one-up the other. You worked your ass off to close the gap, pouring hours into perfecting your work. And Gojo? Gojo barely looked like he was trying. That was what infuriated you the most. He never seemed stressed, never looked exhausted, never talked about pulling all-nighters. He just showed up, half the time looking like he hadnât even studied, and still somehow stayed ahead. Until now. Until your 98 finally beat his 95. A single win isnât enough. But damn, does it feel good.
â
You step into the lecture hall, already bracing yourself for the inevitable. Sure enough, Gojo Satoru is exactly where you expect him to beâsprawled out in his usual seat, legs stretched obnoxiously far like he has no concept of personal space. His sunglasses rest on top of his head, keeping his messy white hair from falling into his annoyingly pretty eyes, and the second he spots you, that familiar smirk tugs at his lips. Youâre already exhausted.Â
âYouâre early,â you mutter, slipping into your seat and pulling out your laptop.
âAnd youâre predictable,â he shoots back. âWhat, do you set an alarm just to make sure you get here before me?â
âYou wish.â
âNah, you wish.â
You pause, narrowing your eyes. âThat doesnât even make sense.â
He shrugs, propping his chin on his hand. âStill got under your skin, though, didnât it?â
You make a sound of irritation in the back of your throat, ready to tell him exactly where he can shove his smug attitude, but your friend plops into the seat next to you, completely unaware of the storm brewing between you and Gojo. You exhale sharply, forcing yourself to shift gearsâthereâs something more important than your ongoing war with him. Something much, much more important.
âOkay, so, I found this book series last night,â you begin, your fingers twitching excitedly as you pull out your phone. âI was going through one of those book recommendation guidesâyou know, the niche ones that arenât full of the same ten bestsellersâand this one just caught my eye.â Your friend hums in interest, booting up their laptop. âWhatâs it about?â
You practically buzz with excitement. âSo itâs kind of likeâugh, how do I explain itâitâs this really well-written like narrative, mystery, suspense, romance, but with, like, existential themes? And this insane world building? And apparently, no one talks about it because the publisher went under before it got the recognition it deserved, so itâs kind of a hidden gem.â As you speak, Gojo, who had been staring blankly at the front of the room, blinks. That sounds familiar.
âYouâre really selling it,â your friend teases.
âRight?! And apparently, itâs super hard to find, but I checked, and our library actually has a few copies.â You tuck your phone away, already feeling a rush of excitement. âIâm gonna borrow the first book after class.â Gojo leans back in his seat, eyes flickering with something unreadable.
Yeah, he thinks. Iâve definitely read that.
He doesnât say anything, though. Just rests his chin in his palm and listens as you keep gushing. Because now that he thinks about it, he really liked that series too. It had been one of those random books he picked up between classes, half expecting to get bored, but then something about it hooked him. The way it wove together philosophy and adventure, the quiet melancholy lingering in the proseâit was the kind of book that stuck with you. But he never finished it. Midterms had hit, and between exams, research papers, and group projects that made him want to rip his hair out, he just⊠forgot. He never went back to check out the last few books. He had meant to, but by the time he had free time again, his brain had moved on. And now here you are, unknowingly digging it back up.
His fingers drum idly against the desk, and for some reason, he canât shake the thought: Sheâs gonna love it. He steals another glance at you. Youâre still talking, eyes bright with excitement, flipping through your phone as you read off little details from the guide you found. The enthusiasm is contagiousâhe canât remember the last time he saw you this animated about something that wasnât academics. Usually, all your energy goes into perfecting equations, arguing with him over points lost on exams, and trying to one-up him in every possible way. This is⊠different.
And weirdly, he finds himself kind of liking it. Not that heâd ever admit it.
â
So after class finally finishesâthankfully, your professor had been going through a hard topic that he kept droning on and on about, emphasising how likely it was to appear in the final examâit was enough to sate even Gojo, who, for once, shut up and took notes diligently. You head out at lightning speed, managing a small âsee you laterâ to your friend before disappearing into the hallway. Honestly, ever since the new year of college had started, youâd barely had time to indulge in activities you actually enjoyed.
Sure, you squeezed in a few books here and there when you had the chance, but it was difficult finding ones that hit just the right wayâones with the same kind of engaging plot, the same writing style that kept you hooked. Youâd tried, but nothing had stuck with you the way your favorite books used to. It had been frustrating, going through these long periods without anything to read. But this time, you had a feeling it would be different.Â
Turning a corner, you step into the vast college library, its sheer size never failing to impress you. The high, arched ceilings, the rows upon rows of bookshelves, and the dozens of students scattered across large wooden tables, heads buried in textbooksâitâs an environment that should feel welcoming, yet all it does is remind you how much work you still have waiting for you. You shake that thought away.
Right now, youâre here for one thing.
You glance at your phone, rereading the authorâs name one last time before slipping it into your pocket and heading straight for the fiction section. Itâs tucked away in one of the quieter corners of the library, past the heavier academic texts, and while itâs not as large as the science or philosophy sections, it still has an impressive selection. The shelves here are a little dustier, the books a little more wornâproof that they donât get checked out as often as the physics or chemistry textbooks. You trace your fingers lightly along the spines, scanning for the title. When you finally spot it, you feel a flicker of excitement. There it is.
The first book in the series. The cover is simple yet striking, the title embossed in slightly faded silver lettering. You pull it off the shelf carefully, glancing around to see if the rest of the series is there. To your delight, every single book is lined up neatly in order. Some of them look well-loved, the edges softened from use, some even slightly bent, as if theyâd been carried around in bags, read and reread countless times.
You flip the book over and read the blurb. Even though you already know the gist of the story from your research, thereâs something about reading the official summary that makes your excitement spike. Itâs exactly what youâve been looking forâan underrated but brilliant story, the kind that feels like a hidden gem. Unable to resist, you take the book with you and settle down at one of the smaller, tucked-away tables. Youâre a slow reader, someone who likes to absorb every word, letting the imagery settle in your mind before moving on. But the moment you turn to the first page and begin reading, youâre immediately pulled in.
The writing is crisp and immersive, the kind that hooks you effortlessly. Within moments, youâre completely lost in the world of the book, eyes darting across the pages, flipping to the next before you even realize it. The characters are compelling, the descriptions vivid, and the dialogue sharp. You can already tell this is going to be one of those stories that sticksâthe kind that lingers in the back of your mind long after youâve finished. Just as you reach a particularly interesting part, your phone buzzes.
You blink, momentarily disoriented before glancing at the screen. Itâs a reminder you set for yourself. Right. You still need to study. A sigh escapes you. As much as you want to keep reading, you know you canât afford to waste too much time. With some reluctance, you close the book and stand up, making your way toward the borrowing counter. You check it out quickly, securing it in your bag, already planning when youâll carve out time to read it between your study sessions. Itâs something to look forward to, at least. And if you had known just who had been the last person to check it out before you, maybe you wouldnât be so eager.
â
The ringer from your Pomodoro timer goes off, its sharp chime cutting through the quiet of your dorm room. With a sigh, you drop your pencil onto your open notebook, rolling your shoulders back as you stretch in your seat, feeling the slight stiffness from hours of hunching over your desk. Lazily glancing at the glowing numbers on your laptop screen, a small grin tugs at the corners of your lips.
Four hours of focused work.
Good. Youâve finally finished studying for the night, trudging through a mountain of tricky concepts and endless equationsâjust enough to ensure youâll keep up with the next few lectures before the actual final exam looms over you. The weight of the work youâve put in settles in a satisfying way, a quiet reassurance that youâre keeping up. Yawning, you grab your phone, thumbing through a few unopened texts, sending half-hearted replies where needed.
Your mind is already half-tuned out, already drifting toward what you actually want to do now that your responsibilities are out of the way for the night. Pushing yourself up from your chair, you shuffle toward your bed, sinking into the softness of your mattress with a pleased sigh. And then, with an eager flicker of excitement, you reach for the borrowed library book resting on your side table, fingers running over the slightly worn edges of the cover.
Finally.
Opening it to the page you had left off, you settle deeper into the blankets, eyes scanning the words slowly, absorbing every detail. The prose is effortless, pulling you into the world woven between the lines. The atmosphere is rich, each description vivid and carefully placed, the characters full of depth. Thereâs a certain feeling you get when a book is just rightâsomething that clicks into place, the rare kind of story that makes the outside world blur at the edges. You donât rush through it.
You savor every word, taking in the dialogue, the intricate details of the setting, the careful unraveling of the plot. Then, just as you shift slightly, readjusting your grip, a small slip of paper flutters from between the pages. You blink, momentarily pulled from the trance of the story, watching as it lands lightly on your blanket.
Frowning, you reach for it, fingers brushing against the slightly yellowed, aged texture of the paper. Itâs rectangular, not quite as thick as a regular bookmark, with neat printed lines running across it in faded ink.
A borrowing card.
You stare at it for a second, a vague memory surfacing. Back during your university orientation in first year, you remember a librarian offhandedly mentioning that some of the older books in the collection still had checkout cards inside them, relics from a time before everything became digitized. But since youâd only ever borrowed course-related booksâones that were constantly replaced with new editionsâyouâd never actually come across one. Huh.Â
Your fingers trace the faded lines as you sit up slightly, eyes scanning the list of names scrawled across itâ
Except⊠there are no names. Just one. Or rather, just a set of initials, written neatly in blue ink
G.S.
The date beside it is from a while ago, though not too long. But the strange thing is, itâs the only entry on the entire card. You blink, flipping it over, checking the back. Nothing. So⊠no one else has borrowed this book? You hesitate, gripping the card a little tighter. Youâre supposed to write your name down now, right? Thatâs how these things work. Itâs a log of borrowers. But thenâwhy had this person only written their initials?
A weird feeling stirs in your chest. Not unease, exactlyâjust something you canât put a name to. Itâs probably nothing. Maybe this book just wasnât that popular. The only reason you found it was because of some obscure online guide, after all. Maybe no one really checked it out over the years, and the one person who did just didnât feel like writing their full name.
Shaking your head, you push the thought aside, grabbing a pen from your nightstand. Without thinking too much about it, you write your own name neatly beneath G.S., along with todayâs date. Then, you tuck the card back into its place and return to your book, letting yourself sink back into the story. A few more pages in, about a quarter of the way through the book, your eyes catch something that makes your brow furrow.
Are those⊠scribbles?
Your annoyance flares up immediately. Who the hell desecrates a library book? Itâs practically sacrilegious. Your fingers tighten slightly around the spine as you bring the book closer to inspect the crime against literature, fully prepared to be enragedâ
Wait.
Theyâre not just random scribbles. Theyâre annotations.
Your irritation dims slightly, curiosity piqued as you squint to make out the neat, slightly slanted cursive handwriting running along the margins. Some words are underlined, a few sentences circled, and in a crisp blue ink, a note is scrawled beside a particularly tense conversation between two characters:
âI can just tell heâs gonna be the one dead first. Heâs overreacting to everything.â
You blink. Then, despite yourself, a small giggle escapes. Becauseâokayâwhoever wrote this isnât wrong. You literally thought the same thing just a few moments ago. As much as you love a good, well-written novel, youâve read enough books in your life to recognise the telltale signs of an early death flag. And this character? Heâs practically begging to be taken out of the story. Your amusement lingers as you scan the page again, eyes flitting to more scribbles running alongside the printed words.
"God, she sounds so insufferable."
You smirk a little at that, suppressing a chuckle.
"I like this lineâthe quote kinda speaks to me."
Your gaze follows the arrow pointing toward a particularly well-crafted piece of dialogue. Huh. You actually like that line too.
"I take the previous statement backâno way did he say that entire motivational monologue just for him to throw his morals aside..."
A small, surprised laugh escapes you. You love when characters do this kind of thingâspend pages waxing poetic about their grand principles, only to completely toss them out the window at the first sign of trouble. Itâs frustrating, but also wildly entertaining, and you find yourself nodding unconsciously in agreement.
You shift slightly, adjusting your grip on the book as your initial annoyance starts to morph into something elseâsomething you donât want to admit is enjoyment. Because as much as you usually hate unnecessary markings in books, these annotations donât feel disruptive.
They feel⊠engaging. Like youâre reading with someone. Itâs a strange feelingâan unexpected, quiet kind of companionship in the margins of the book. You scan ahead, flipping a few pages forward, wondering if this mystery annotatorâG.S., you assumeâhas left their thoughts scattered throughout the entire book.
Oh. They have. Almost every page has at least something scribbled in the margins. Some annotations are sarcastic, others incredulous. A few are simple observations or predictions about the plot, and some are just random, dramatic reactions that make you snort.
"Oh my GOD, just kiss already!"
You huff out an amused breath, shaking your head.
"He is so painfully oblivious itâs almost impressive."
Honestly, you were thinking the same thing. Before you realize it, youâve started reading out loudânot the annotations, but the actual book. Itâs something you do sometimes when youâre alone, when a scene is particularly well-written or emotional. And now, with G.S.âs thoughts scattered alongside the text, it almost feels like youâre having a conversation with them. Like theyâre some ghostly presence in the book, reacting alongside you in real time.
You catch yourself before you say something back to one of the notes.
Which is insane. Because this is just a random personâs handwriting in a library book. And yetâ
You exhale through your nose, fingers absentmindedly tracing the edge of the page. You kind of⊠want to know who they are. Who is G.S.? Because if their annotations are anything to go by, they have the exact same thoughts as you while reading. The same exasperation, the same eye-roll-worthy observations, the same appreciation for the well-crafted lines. And you canât help but wonderâjust who was sitting with this same book in their hands, reading the same words, thinking the same things? Itâs an odd, fleeting curiosity, but you push it aside for now, shaking your head as you turn the page.
You settle deeper into your blankets, the book resting comfortably in your hands as you turn the page. The words on the paper blur slightly in the dim light of your bedside lamp, but you donât mindâyouâre too immersed now, drawn into both the story and the unexpected presence of G.S. in the margins. The next chapter begins, and you take a slow breath before diving in, eyes flicking between the printed text and the handwritten notes.
"Oh, I just know this is going to go terribly."
You glance at the line itâs referencingâa scene where the protagonist makes a bold, arguably reckless decision. Yeah, G.S. is probably right. A few more pages pass. The tension in the book rises, and youâre so absorbed that you nearly miss the next annotation.
"There it is. The classic âstaring at the moon in emotional turmoilâ scene. Authors love this one."
You snort. Okay, but theyâre right. You tilt your head, momentarily pausing your reading to stare at the note. Itâs a little strange, this dynamic youâve somehow fallen into with a complete stranger. You feel like you know them, or at least, their reading habits. Their humor. The way they react to the exact same things that pull at your attention. It's unsettling in a way thatâs not entirely unpleasant. You flip forward, skimming ahead to see if the notes continueâand they do.
"I KNEW IT. I CALLED IT. HEâS A TRAITOR."
You blink, pausing mid-sentence. Your gaze darts back to the text, where a major plot twist has just been revealed. Your mouth parts slightly, rereading the words to make sure youâre seeing them correctly. Damn. You did not see that coming.
You exhale, a small smirk tugging at your lips. Fine. Point to you, G.S. You keep reading, now almost waiting for the next annotation, like itâs a second voice in your head providing commentary as you go. And when the protagonist makes another questionable decisionâ
"Why are men in fiction like this?"
âyou laugh, shaking your head. It continues like that for pages. Every now and then, G.S. 's notes make you chuckle, or nod in agreement, or roll your eyes because come on, that was an obvious metaphor. And as much as you want to be annoyed by the interruptions, you find yourself⊠enjoying it. Maybe even liking it. At some point, you shift your position, getting more comfortable against your pillows, completely absorbed. The words feel alive, and not just the printed ones, but the ones scribbled in blue ink alongside them. Itâs a conversation you never expected to haveâone separated by time, by anonymity, by the unlikelihood of ever knowing who G.S. is. Your fingers brush over the ink of the annotations, slightly faded but still legible. Thinking back to the date listed on the library card from quite a while ago, you wonder if G.S. has even thought about this book since then. Or if theyâve forgotten about it entirely. You stare at the letters for a moment longer before shaking your head, pushing away the odd sensation curling at the back of your mind.
Itâs just a book. Just some random personâs annotations. It doesnât mean anything.
A reminder notification pops up on your phoneâone youâd set earlier to keep your study schedule in check. You sigh. Right. You should get some sleep soon. Reluctantly, you close the book, running your fingers over the cover one last time before placing it on your nightstand. Youâll finish it laterâbetween classes, between assignments, between all the little gaps in your schedule where you can steal a moment to read. And maybe, youâll keep an eye out. Because now, you kind of want to know if G.S. ever came back for this book.
â
By the time your next Physics lecture rolls around, youâve already finished the first book in the series. It had consumed your nights, pulling you in with its immersive world-building and gripping storylineâbut, if you were being honest, the experience had been made infinitely more enjoyable because of the annotations left behind in the margins. The presence of another reader, someone who had walked the same narrative path as you and left breadcrumbs of their thoughts along the way, had made the book feel less like a solitary escape and more like a shared secret. So, naturally, when you stride into class that morning, youâre already prepared to discuss it at length with your friend.
What you arenât prepared for is Gojo Satoru.
Not that you ever are, really. He has a habit of making his presence known, like some self-appointed force of nature existing solely to get under your skin. And today is no differentâhe walks past you with an easy, sauntering gait, the kind thatâs deliberately slow enough to be obnoxious. Thereâs a telltale smirk tugging at his lips, the glint of mischief in his strikingly bright eyes as he leans in, as if heâs about to say something insufferable just to throw off your morning. You pretend not to see him.
Your willful ignorance must be obvious because you hear him scoff under his breath as he passes by, but you donât give him the satisfaction of looking.
Instead, you beeline toward the row where your friend is already seated, setting your bag down with an eager bounce in your step.
âDude,â you start, flipping open your laptop with a flourish, âremember that book I told you about a few weeks back?â Your friend raises a brow. âThe one from that super niche book guide you were raving about?â
âThe very same one,â you confirm, barely able to contain your excitement. âI finally finished it, and oh my god, it was so good. The plot? Phenomenal. The pacing? Perfect. But you know what actually made it even better?âÂ
You donât notice the way Gojo hesitates just as heâs about to settle into the seat behind you. He freezes, fingers hovering above the keyboard of his laptop as his ears zero in on your conversation.
âYou found another book to obsess over?â Your friend teases, but you shake your head fervently.
âNo, no, listen,â you insist, your voice lowering slightly as you lean in, âsomeone left annotations in it.âÂ
Satoruâs fingers twitch.
âYou mean like, study notes?â
âNo! Like, actual thoughtsâcomments, reactions, opinions. And not just boring analytical stuff, either. They were funny. Snarky. They made fun of the characters at the exact moments I wanted to. It was like reading the book with someone, you know?â
A very distinct, yet invisible, sense of dread creeps into Gojoâs chest.
Oh. Oh, shit. The annotations. He had completely forgotten about those. He had scrawled them in the margins ages agoâmostly on a whim, partly out of boredom, and entirely because he physically could not read a book in silence. If there was one thing Gojo Satoru was incapable of, it was shutting the fuck up, even when he was the only audience for his own commentary. So, naturally, when he had found himself enjoying the book way more than expected, he had started treating it like a private conversation with himself, writing down whatever thoughts came to mind.
He never expected anyone to see them. And now, sitting barely a foot away, heâs listening to youâof all peopleâexcitedly gush about his stupid little scribbles, completely oblivious to the fact that the person you were praising, the one whose humor you found entertaining and whose insights you had agreed with, was him. He schools his expression, keeping his head tilted just enough to appear disinterested. But his ears are wide open.
âWhoever wrote those notes,â you continue, flipping your pen between your fingers, âhad some serious opinions. And honestly? I kind of love them. Like, I think we have the same brain.â
Satoru presses his lips together, biting back a grin.
You? Agreeing with him? That was new.Â
Your friend hums. âSo youâre basically having a book club with some anonymous person who read it before you?â You chuckle. âI mean⊠kinda? Itâs weird, but itâs nice in a way. Like, usually when I read, itâs just me and the book. But with the annotations, itâs like thereâs this extra layer of interaction. I get to see how someone else processed the story, how they reacted to the same moments I did.â
Satoru knows he should stop listening. He should. But he doesnât.
Because something about this whole situationâthe fact that you, of all people, had unknowingly connected with him through a bookâhas him equal parts amused and intrigued. You, who always huffed when he teased you. You, who rolled your eyes at his antics, who made a point to ignore him even though he knew you were hyper-aware of his presence.
You had spent nights poring over words he had written in passing. And you had liked them. God, if you knew, youâd probably strangle him on the spot.
âI actually wanna see if this person has read the rest of the series,â you muse, mostly to yourself. âLike, maybe they annotated other books too.âÂ
Satoru exhales through his nose, staring at his laptop screen but not actually registering anything on it. Well. This was going to be interesting.
â
You make your way to the library once again, the first book of the series clutched in your hands, ready to be returned. It feels weird, parting with it. As if youâre saying goodbye to something that had, for the past week, been a quiet companion during your late-night reading sessions. But not to worry, thereâs still like five more books in the series. Your steps slow slightly as you approach the return counter, fingers absently reaching into your bagâs open pocket for a pen. Without much thought, you flip open the book and scrawl the date of return onto the inside of the back cover, where the borrowing card is located. Your thumb absentmindedly drags across the faded blue ink of the initials scrawled in the row above where youâve signed your name.Â
G.S.
Whoever they were, they had made your reading experience infinitely better with their wry, sarcastic observations and strangely thoughtful insights. It was like reading alongside a particularly sharp-witted friendâone who, frustratingly, was just out of reach. Youâre lost in thought, mulling over the mystery of G.S., when you abruptly walk straight into something firm and unmoving. And warm.
Something that smells like sandalwood and fresh linen and something inexplicably, irritatingly familiar.
You barely have time to stagger back before a voiceâdeep, lazy, and dripping with its usual brand of smugnessâdrawls, âMy, my, pretending to walk around with your nose in a book so people think youâre more studious than you actually are?â
Your stomach sinks. You do not have the patience for this right now.
âFuck off, Satoru,â you mutter, not even looking at him as you try to sidestep. Predictably, he moves right in front of you again, blocking your path with that insufferable ease of his. Hands in the pockets of his impeccably tailored slacks, sleeves of a stupidly expensive cashmere sweater pushed up to reveal the sharp line of his wrists and veiny forearms, and his ever-present glasses glinting under the dim library lightsâhe looks as if he owns the place.
His head tilts, white hair falling slightly over his frames as he glances down at the book in your hands. That smileâall teeth and smugnessâspreads across his face like heâs caught you in something scandalous.
âOh? Reading a book that isnât course-related? Scandalous. What happened, got bored of being a try-hard? Or are you just begging to score lower than me on the final?â He exhales dramatically, shaking his head. âTsk, tsk. Not that Iâd expect you to actually be on my level, but itâs cute that you tryââ
You stop listening after that. Normally, youâd throw something equally sharp-tongued back at him, tell him to go get hit by a bus or something equally creative, but youâre too drained to bother. The exhaustion from back-to-back lectures, plus the fact that you havenât eaten anything substantial today, has dulled the sharp edges of your patience. A dull ache pounds at the base of your skull, and every word out of his mouth makes it throb even harder. Your expression must give away more than you intend because, for a split second, Gojo falters.
Itâs quickâbarely there. But you see it.
A flicker of something almost resembling concern flashes behind his glasses, like heâs actually noticed how drained you look. The moment is gone before you can process it. His usual smug expression slides right back into place, and you donât have the energy to care.
âI need to return this,â you say flatly. âGet out of my way.â
Instead of stepping aside like a normal person, he falls into step beside you, hands still lazily stuffed in his pockets. âOh? So now you acknowledge my presence,â he muses, voice light. âWhat, you didnât miss me in class today? I even waited for you to roll your eyes at me like you do every morning. Felt almost lonely without it.â
âI genuinely do not care,â you reply without looking at him. He presses a hand to his chest as if wounded. âOuch. Someoneâs moody today. Low blood sugar? On your period? Brain finally given up trying to keep up with mine?âÂ
You donât dignify that with a response, instead sliding the book into the return pile with a little more force than necessary. Gojo watches, his gaze flickering between you and the book.
âWhat book were you returning, anyway?â The question is so casual, so offhanded, that you almost donât clock it as strange. Almost. You narrow your eyes at him. âDidnât take you for someone interested in my life.â
His lips curl into something unbearably smug. âOh, Iâm not.â He rocks back on his heels, pushing his glasses further up the bridge of his nose. âI just like knowing what my rival is up to outside of class. You know, studying your weaknesses. Gathering intel. The usual.âÂ
You stare at him. âYou are so full of shit.â
âI really am,â he agrees cheerfully. You exhale through your nose, patience wearing thinner by the second. âShouldnât you be off somewhere being a general public nuisance?â
âThis is me being a general public nuisance.â He grins. âAnd youâre the lucky victim of the day.â
âGod, I hate you.â
âAww, thatâs cute. But you should be honest with yourself,â he says, following you as you make your way toward the exit. âI think youâd miss me if I suddenly disappeared.â
âAbsolutely not.â
âYou so would.â
âI would thrive in your absence.â
Gojo makes an exaggerated show of wiping away an imaginary tear. âHow cruel. And here I was, thinking we had something special.â
You push open the library doors, stepping out into the crisp afternoon air. Finally, freedom. But, of course, Gojo keeps following you.
ââŠWhy are you still here?â you ask, tiredly. He hums. âDunno. Walking this way.â
âYou donât even know where Iâm going.â
âExactly,â he says, grinning. âA mystery. How exciting.â You consider throwing your bag at him. You settle for walking faster. You quicken your pace, hoping Gojo will get bored and wander off. He doesnât. Of course he doesnât. He easily keeps up with you, long legs making it effortless, his stupid grin never fading.
âWalking faster wonât shake me, you know,â he muses, sounding entirely too pleased with himself. âIf I didnât know any better, Iâd think you enjoy my company.â You donât bother responding, gripping the strap of your bag tighter and staring straight ahead. He walks backward in front of you, head tilted, watching you with an almost lazy amusement. âSo, where are you going? CafĂ©? Student lounge? Maybe a secret nerd meeting where you all discuss the best highlighters for maximum efficiency?â
You give him a deadpan look. âYes, Satoru. Thatâs exactly what Iâm doing. Weâre all going to sit in a circle and ritually sharpen our pencils while whispering incantations about final exams.â He gasps dramatically. âI knew it. I bet you have a shrine dedicated to good grades too. And, like, a little altar where you sacrifice people who get higher scores than youââ
âI donât need to sacrifice anyone,â you cut in, dryly. âBecause I get the highest scores.â His grin widens. âNot all of them.â
You bristle, and he knows it. You both know that you and Gojo have been locked in a constant academic battle since the semester started. Itâs maddening how often you end up in the top two spots. Even more maddening that he acts like he doesnât even try. You exhale slowly, trying to focus on literally anything else. âIâm going to get food. Why donât you go fuck off somewhere, like, I donât know, ruin someone elseâs day?âÂ
âYou wound me with such crass language,â he says, clutching his chest like you physically struck him. âIâm just being a good friend.â
âYouâre not my friend.â
âWow.â He sighs dramatically, as if genuinely offended. âAll this time weâve spent together, and you still call us enemies? Iâd like to think of us more as⊠frenemies.â
âI would like to think of us as strangers.â
âAnd yet,â he says, smirking, âyou still talk to me.â
You roll your eyes. âOnly because you wonât shut up.âÂ
Gojo shrugs. âDetails.âÂ
By now, youâve reached the campus cafĂ©. The smell of coffee and freshly baked pastries drifts through the air, making your stomach growl embarrassingly loud. You knew skipping lunch was a bad idea. Gojo hears it, of course.
âOh?â His eyebrows lift, delighted. âWas that your stomach? Should I be worried? Are you dying of starvation? Is this how our rivalry ends?â You ignore him and step inside. The cafĂ© is buzzing with students, some hunched over laptops, others chatting over coffee. You head straight for the counter, scanning the menu, debating if you should just get something quick and easy or actually sit down for a meal. Gojo, uninvited, leans casually against the counter beside you.
âGetting a drink too?â he asks, peering over your shoulder.
âWhy do you care?â
âMaybe I wanna know what fuels my biggest competition,â he says, tone exaggeratedly thoughtful. âWhatâs the secret? Triple shot espresso? Pure willpower? The tears of your academic rivals?â You give him a look. âYouâre projecting. You probably run on the suffering of others.â
âObviously,â he says easily. âBut I like to mix in a little sugar sometimes. Keeps me balanced and shit.â Youâre about to tell him to go bother someone else when the barista glances up. âNext?â You quickly place your order. Just as youâre about to pull out your wallet, Gojoâs voice rings out:
âIâve got it.â
Your head snaps toward him. âWhat.â
âIâm paying.â You stare at him, genuinely baffled. âWhy?â
He grins. âBecause Iâm so generous, obviously.â You narrow your eyes. âNo, really. Whatâs the catch?â
He puts a hand over his heart, feigning offense. âYou think Iâd trick you? Iâm hurt.â
âYes.â
Gojo just laughs and hands his card to the barista before you can argue further. You glare at him. âThis better not be some elaborate scheme to hold this over my head later.â
âOh, it definitely is,â he says cheerfully. âI plan to bring it up all the time.â
âOf course you do.â Your drinkâ tea to be specificâ is ready a moment later. Begrudgingly, you take it, mumbling, âThanks.â Gojo gasps, eyes wide. âDid you just thank me?â You exhale. âNever mind. I take it back.â
âNo, no, itâs too late, you already said it.â He grins. âYou like me.â
âI hate you.â
âYou adore me.â
âI tolerate you at best.â Gojo sips his drink, looking entirely too pleased with himself. âThatâs basically the same thing.â You groan and turn to leave.
Thankfully he doesnât make the move to follow you this time.
â
Your⊠somewhat friendly interaction with SaâNo, Gojoâwas forgotten by the time the next week rolled around. Not deliberately, of course. But between your physics assignments, math problem sets, and an unrelenting pile of lecture notes to review, your brain had simply discarded the memory. College had a way of pushing everything that wasnât directly necessary for survival to the furthest corners of your mind. Currently, you were in the library, hunched over a thick textbook, your fingers curled into your hair as you skimmed the same paragraph for what felt like the tenth time. Nothing was sticking.
You groaned, tilting your head back against the chair and letting your gaze drift to the high ceilings of the study space. It was quiet, save for the occasional rustle of pages and the rhythmic clicking of laptop keys. Your physics notes sat in front of you, covered in a desperate sprawl of formulas and diagrams, but the more you stared, the more meaningless the symbols became. You needed a break. Your eyes flickered toward the fiction section.
It wouldnât hurt to get another book.
A moment later, you were standing in front of the shelves, fingers tracing the spines as you searched for the second book in the series. It didnât take long to findâit was positioned neatly with the rest of the series, the cover slightly fading due to how long it had probably been there. As you turned to leave, your thumb brushed against the inside cover, where the borrowing card was located.
And there, scrawled in the same faded blue ink as before, were the initials:
G.S.
You paused. Your mystery commentator had been here before you. Again. You traced the letters absentmindedly, your mind flickering back to the first book. Their annotations had been witty, sometimes mocking, but always sharp. You had enjoyed themâmore than you expected.
You flipped to the borrowing card. G.S. had checked out this book multiple times. At least three dates next to their initials. A strange feeling settled in your chest. Who were they? You shook your head, pushing the thought aside as you made your way to the borrowing counter. It doesnât matter. Itâs just some random person. Still, as you returned to your study space, setting the book beside your untouched notes, your fingers itched to open it.
You triedâreally triedâto focus on physics. For maybe ten minutes. Then, with a sigh, you slid your textbook aside and cracked open the novel. This one picked up right where the last had left offâthe protagonist, an ambitious scholar, now forced into an uneasy alliance with a rogue historian, both of them hunting for a long-lost manuscript said to contain the secrets of the universe. Their journey took them through ancient libraries, shadowy alleyways, and grand halls of academia filled with intrigue and suspense that you thoroughly enjoyed.Â
It wasnât long before you noticed the annotations.
"What an idiot. Why would you trust someone who literally betrayed you three chapters ago?" You huffed a quiet laugh. It was scrawled in the margins of a tense conversation between the protagonist and the historian, who had indeed been suspiciously untrustworthy.
Another note, a few pages later: "This argument is painfully dumb. If they just communicated, we wouldnât need three more chapters of tension." You found yourself smiling. Whoever this was, they were blunt, maybe a bit cynical, but entertaining.
Then, another annotation caught your attentionâthis one different. It was scribbled beside a passage where the protagonist was deciphering an ancient mathematical equation, trying to understand the patterns behind the manuscriptâs code. The handwriting was just as casual, but the contentâ
"This is basically just Fourier analysis but dressed up in fancy old-world academia. If the author actually wanted to be accurate, theyâd at least mention waveforms. But nooo, we get poetic nonsense instead."
You blinked. That was⊠oddly specific. And not the kind of thing your average literature enthusiast would comment on. For a fleeting second, you wonderedâ
Does G.S. study physics?
The thought was strange, lingering in the back of your mind even as you continued reading. Minutes turned into hours. Slowly, students trickled out of the library. The rustling of papers faded, the soft murmur of whispered conversations disappearing into the silence of the near-empty study space. You didnât notice.
Not until the overhead lights dimmed slightly, signaling that the library was closing soon. With a sigh, you shut the book, stretching your stiff limbs. Physics could wait a little longer.
â
A few days later, you found yourself in yet another grueling lecture. The classroom was buzzing with low chatter as students filtered in, some sleep-deprived, some over-caffeinated, and most looking like theyâd rather be anywhere else. You were somewhere in the middleâtired but functional, flipping through your notes with half-hearted interest as you tried to prepare yourself for another two-hour session of mathematical physics. You adjusted your laptop screen, took a sip of your tea, and just as you settled in, you felt a presence.
A familiar, irritating presence.Â
âMorning, rival,â Gojo Satoru said cheerfully, dropping into the seat next to you with all the grace of an avalanche. You didnât even look up. âGo away.â
He tsked. âIs that any way to greet your favorite classmate?â
âYouâre not my favorite classmate.â He grinned, propping his chin on one hand.
âDonât lie. Youâd miss me if I wasnât here to make class interesting.â
You ignored him, resolutely staring at your notes. The professor arrived a moment later, quickly settling into the dayâs topicâwave equations and their applications. The discussion meandered through standard examples, Fourier transforms, and the different methods used to break down complex waveforms.
You barely registered the name of the theoryâjust a fleeting recognition of something familiarâbefore you were back to jotting down notes. At first, you were focused, diligently taking notes and absorbing the information. For the first thirty minutes, you managed to avoid paying him any attention. You scribbled down notes, underlined important formulas, and even managed to listen without feeling the urge to slam your head into the desk.
But thenâof courseâGojo had to open his mouth.
âSo, hypothetically,â he mused, voice carrying just enough to be heard by the surrounding students, âif we were to apply this to a broader model, say⊠nonlinear oscillations, wouldnât that meanââ
You immediately frowned. He was already trying to sound smarter than he was.
âThatâs not how that works,â you cut in before the professor could even acknowledge him. Gojo turned to you, looking far too entertained. âYeah, it is.â
âNo, it isnât.â You shifted in your seat, twisting to face him fully. âYou canât just apply Fourier analysis wherever you want and expect the results to be useful. Nonlinear oscillations donât break down the same way because of the introduction of chaotic behaviorââ
âOh, come on,â Gojo scoffed, waving a hand. âItâs not that deep. Sure, chaotic elements make things messier, but that doesnât mean the framework is useless.â
You let out a sharp breath. âIt means the entire assumption of the analysis changes. You canât approximate a nonlinear system with linear components and expect the results to hold upââ
âYou can if you use a perturbative approach,â he countered smoothly.
You almost growled. âA perturbative approach only works when the nonlinear term is small relative to the linear system. If the nonlinearities dominate, your entire model collapses.â
âNot always,â Gojo shot back, shifting in his seat with that insufferable smirk. âIt depends on how well you construct the higher-order termsââ
You threw your hands up. âAt that point, you might as well scrap Fourier analysis entirely and just use a different decomposition method!â A few students had stopped taking notes. Some were watching out of curiosity; others, out of sheer amusement.
Gojo, completely unbothered, shrugged. âBut that wasnât the question, was it? The point is that Fourier methods can still be useful, even if the system isnât perfectly linearââ
You gritted your teeth. âUseful doesnât mean accurate, dumbass.â Gojo gasped dramatically. âDid you just call me a dumbass? Right here? In front of our professor?â
âMaybe I wouldnât have to if you stopped saying objectively incorrect thingsââ
âOh, please,â he drawled, leaning back in his seat. âYouâre just mad because Iâm right.â
Your jaw clenched. âYouâre not right.â
âI am right.â
âNo, youâreââ
A loud cough. You both froze. Slowly, you turned toward the front of the room, where the professor was staring at you both, unamused.
"Would you two care to bring your literary debate outside of my physics class?" You swallowed. Gojo scratched the back of his neck, looking entirely unbothered.
"...No, sir."
"Good," the professor said flatly. "Then kindly stop interrupting the lesson." You resisted the urge to sink into your chair. Gojo, of course, had the audacity to look amused. As the lecture resumed, you shot him a glare.
"This is your fault."Â
He winked. You swore you were going to strangle him one day. As soon as class ended, you were out of your seat, shoving your laptop into your bag with slightly more force than necessary. Behind you, Gojo was taking his sweet time, stretching like he hadnât just spent the past two hours actively making your life worse. âMan,â he sighed dramatically. âThat was a great discussion, donât you think? Nothing like a little intellectual sparring to keep the brain sharpââ
You spun around so fast he almost bumped into you. âDiscussion?â you repeated incredulously. âThat wasnât a discussion, that was you talking out of your ass like usual.â
Gojo placed a hand over his heart, feigning offense. âWow. You wound me. You know, I feel like I say that phrase a lot. Would you prefer it if I said thee painfully wrench mine own heart with such careless wordsââ
You rolled your eyes and stormed out of the lecture hall, weaving through the crowd of students. Of course he followed, long strides easily keeping pace with yours. âIâm just saying,â he continued, completely ignoring your clear irritation, âitâs kind of funny how you always shoot me down but never actually prove me wrongââ
Your jaw clenched. âI do prove you wrong. Every time.âÂ
He smirked. âDo you, though?â
âYes!â You turned on your heel, walking backward so you could glare at him properly. âJust because you talk like you know everything doesnât mean you actually doââ
Gojoâs smirk widened. âSo you do think I sound smart.â Your eye twitched.
âThatâs not what I said.â
âSounds like thatâs what you said.â
âGo kill yourself.â
âOnly if you join me, sweets.â
âDonât call me that!â
âWhy, you donât like being called sweets?ââ
You groaned, turning back around and quickening your pace. You werenât going to stand here and let him twist your words into whatever self-indulgent nonsense was brewing in his head. Gojo, naturally, kept up with ease. âYou know, itâs weird how you always get so mad at me. Maybe you should work on that anger problem of yours.â
âOh, I have an anger problem?â You spun around again, narrowing your eyes. âYouâre literally the most aggravating person Iâve ever met.â
âReally?â He tilted his head in mock thought. âI dunno, you seem to get pretty riled up over nothingââ
âYou are nothing.â
Gojo laughed, the sound bright and infuriatingly genuine. âDamn, that was actually kinda good. You been practicing comebacks in the mirror?â
âLeave me alone, for the love of god, before I strangle you, bastardââ
âOooh, kinkyâ.â
Before you could actually commit violence, someone stepped between you. âAlright, enough,â a smooth, tired voice interrupted. You looked up to see Suguru Geto, Gojoâs ever-patient best friend, standing between you with the exasperation of a man who had dealt with this before.
âSatoru,â he said, dragging a hand down his face, âleave her alone.âÂ
Gojo pouted. âBut we were bonding.â
âWe were not bonding,â you snapped. Suguru gave you a knowing look. âAnd you,â he sighed, âstop encouraging him.â
You scoffed. âEncouraging him? Iââ
A hand suddenly clamped down on your shoulder. You glanced up to see your own friend standing beside you, looking just as exasperated as Suguru. âCome on,â she muttered, tugging you away. âWeâre going to lunch before you actually try to kill him.â You didnât resist, only because the temptation was strong. But as you turned to leave, you caught a glimpse of Gojo flashing that stupid, insufferable grin at you.
You stuck your tongue out at him. Gojo only winked again in response. Why did he keep winking at you? It made you wanna puke. You definitely needed lunch. Maybe something very, very spicy.
â
You're sitting in your dorm again, cross-legged on your bed, laptop open in front of you, but your mind is elsewhere. The textbooks and notes are pushed to the side of your desk, proof that at some point you had every intention of being productive tonight. A third empty cup of tea is perched precariously on your nightstand, and the finished second and third books of the series stacked besides your laptop.Â
It had been a slow burn, working your way through them between lectures and study sessions, but now, the empty feeling of finishing a book you enjoyed is settling in. Worse yet, it's late at night, which means you can't borrow the fourth book until tomorrow. The thought alone makes you sigh as you shut your laptop and flop back against the pillows.
You flipped open the third book, fingers brushing over the slightly worn borrowing card tucked inside. The neat, slanted initials âG.S.â were there again, written in blue ink. And just like before, the pages had been marked with the same sharp, and sometimes frustratingly perceptive annotations that had made you laugh, scoff, and evenâon some particularly well-argued pointsâbegrudgingly nod along. Your mind drifts, replaying some of your favorite annotations from the books.
There was the one where G.S. had written, "Oh, he's totally gonna betray them," followed by a later note that read, "I CALLED IT. WHEREâS MY PRIZE?" That one had made you laugh out loud in the middle of the library, earning a few disapproving stares. Another one of your other favorites from the third book had been an annotation scrawled in the margins of a pivotal scene:
âThe irony of this moment is almost painful. She sees herself as the heroine, but the real tragedy is that sheâs just another character in someone elseâs story.â
You had reread that line about five times before closing the book and staring at the ceiling, feeling somewhat existential. Another annotation had been pure sarcasm:
âYes, because when faced with adversity, the best solution is always to run directly into danger. Genius.â That one had also made you laugh out loud in one of the study halls located in some part of your university, earning a weird look from the girl across the hall. But the annotation that had really stuck with youâreally made you pauseâwas in the third book, written in response to a section that delved into the intricacies of time and choice:
âIf you think about it, this entire dilemma can be broken down into a fundamental question of physics. If time is just another dimension, then isnât every choice we make just another coordinate on an already-existing map? So is it really âfree willâ if weâre just tracing a path thatâs already there?â
That one had thrown you for a loop. It was the kind of thought that lingered, weaving its way into quiet moments when you least expected it. And, you hated to admit, it made you thinkâwhoever this person was, they were kind of brilliant.You sighed, snapping the book shut. You needed to get the fourth one. Now. But a quick glance at your phone reminded you that it was almost midnight, and the library had closed hours ago. You groaned, letting your head submerge deeper into the pillows. You grabbed your phone, scrolling mindlessly, until your eyes flicked to the messages her friend had sent earlierârecommendations for movies sheâd been meaning to watch. You scrolled absentmindedly, not really expecting to find anything interesting, until your thumb hovered over one title:
Whisper of the Heart.
Something about the name tugged at your memory. Wasnât this the one with the girl who loved books and a mysterious boy who shared them? On a whim, you pressed play. The soft hum of the opening scene filled the quiet of her dorm, and soon, you were drawn in. The gentle storytelling, the warmth of the animation, the way the main character, Shizuku, slowly became obsessed with the name written in all the books she borrowedâ
Oh. Oh, shit.
Your face grew hot as you sat up straighter, eyes darting to the books stacked beside you. You weren't doing that. Right?
âŠWere you? Because if you really thought about itâif you really thought about itâwerenât you kind of doing the same thing? You buried your face in your hands. This is so embarrassing. And yet, as you peeked between her fingers at the screen, you couldnât help but draw the comparison between Seiji Amasawa and your mysterious, faceless G.S. Seiji had been intriguing, a presence felt long before he actually appeared. Just a name scribbled in books, a person she hadnât met yet but somehow felt connected to. And wasnât that exactly what G.S. was?
You groaned, flopping back onto your bed, kicking your feet against the mattress. âI need to stop,â you mumbled into your pillow, but your shoulders shook with barely contained laughter. It was stupid. This whole thing was stupid. You didnât even know this person. For all you knew, G.S. could be some forty-year-old professor or a girl who just happened to find the same series as you on the niche book guide you were on. And yet, there was this tiny, ridiculous, completely unserious part of you that wanted to believeâ
What if it was some guy? A guy with sharp wit, someone who thought deeply about things most people glossed over, someone who liked this series enough to leave behind thoughts for others to find. A guy whoâ No. Nope. Nope. You were not about to mentally script herself into some shoujo romance anime over marginalia.
But the damage was done. Because now, your brain had latched onto the idea, spinning daydreams faster than you could stop them. Some dramatic, cinematic first meeting. Some passing moment where youâd reach for a book, and a handâslender fingers, ink-stained maybeâwould brush against yours, and youâd look up andâ
You shot up again, shaking your head violently. God, this is pathetic. But even as you scolded herself, you couldnât wipe the stupid little smile off your face. You were allowed to have a little fun, right? Just a tiny bit of harmless romanticising? You collapsed back into the pillows, eyes drifting back to the ceiling as the movie played on. And as Shizukuâs voice echoed through the room, musing about stories, destiny, and the people we stumble upon by chance, you thoughtâjust for a secondâMaybe, maybe, you kind of liked this. The idea of it all. The way life sometimes felt like a story waiting to unfold. Maybe itâs silly, maybe itâs unrealisticâbut right now, in the quiet of your dorm, with the soft glow of your laptop screen and the remnants of Whisper of the Heart playing in the background, you donât really care.
â
Satoru Gojo had always been considered a prodigy. A genius. Someone born with an innate brilliance that set him apart from others. It had been that way since he was a childâwhere other kids had to struggle and study, he breezed through school without breaking a sweat. It wasnât just academics, either. He was quick-witted, sharp, and effortlessly charming in a way that made people gravitate toward him. But when you grow up with everyone expecting greatness from you, it becomes suffocating.Â
So he learned to play the fool.
It started as a maskâbeing overly cheery, always teasing, never taking things too seriously. It was easier that way. No one could see the weight of expectations if he always had a grin on his face. And at some point, the mask became second nature. Satoru Gojo, the carefree, insufferable genius. The only person he could ever drop it around was Suguru. His best friend, the one person who could keep up with him, who understood what it meant to carry something too heavy to put into words. Then, freshman year of university, he saw you.
He had noticed you beforeâhow could he not? You were diligent, meticulous in a way that fascinated him. You always sat at the front of the class, always had color-coded notes, always took everything so seriously. And maybe that was what caught his attention first. You were everything he wasnât. Where he coasted through life, you worked hard for it. And for the first time in a long time, he didnât quite know how to communicate with someone. So he did what he always did. He teased.
âThe perpendicular components of a vector are independent of each other,â youâd answered smoothly, sitting up a little straighter as you prepared to elaborate. âThatâs why we can analyse them separately usingââ
âOhhh, wow,â he cut in, voice dripping with mock wonder. âLook at that. We got a genius in the house.â He had meant it playfully. A joke. But the way your expression hardened, the way your eyes flickered with irritation, made something click in his brain. You didnât like him. And yet, he couldnât stop teasing you. Even when he knew it annoyed you, even when he knew you hated him. Maybe it was because you challenged him. Maybe it was because, for once, someone didnât look at him like he was untouchable. Or maybe it was because he liked you.
Not just because you were prettyâthough you were, infuriatingly soâbut because you were determined. Because you cared about things deeply. Because you fascinated him in a way nothing else did. He found himself watching you more often than he cared to admit. The way you bit your lip when you were concentrating, the way your eyes lit up when you finally understood something, the way you tucked a strand of hair behind your ear when you were nervous when results came out. It was all so... endearing.
And maybe thatâs why he finds himself watching you sometimesâwhen youâre scribbling furiously in your notebook, when youâre biting the end of your pen in deep thought, when youâre rolling your eyes at something he says but still, still responding. He watches, because for the first time, someone makes him want to understand more than just equations and theories. And if the only way to keep your attention was by being your rival, then so be it.
â
The next morning, you had a practical class, a hands-on session designed to reinforce the theory youâd been learning. Since it was held in a laboratory, students were sorted into small groups to share lab tables. Unfortunatelyâor fortunately, depending on how you looked at itâyou werenât grouped with Satoru, but by some cruel twist of fate, his group was at the same table as yours. The setup was simple: four students per group, two groups per table.
A long, clean expanse of black lab benches stretched across the room, each one covered with neatly arranged equipment: a set of metal ramps, photogates, a timer, and a set of small carts. Todayâs experiment was a classic: measuring acceleration using a motion sensor. Each group was supposed to release a cart down a ramp and use the photogates to measure velocity changes over time. Simple, right? Satoru, of course, had already started causing trouble before the experiment even began.
âYou know, itâs kinda unfair that I wasnât put in your group,â he mused, leaning against the lab bench with a smirk. âWouldâve been fun watching you pretend to know more than me.â You didnât even look up as you adjusted the height of the ramp, focusing on making sure it was aligned properly. âOh please, Gojo, you wouldâve just copied all my calculations and then taken credit for my hard work.â
âI wouldnât do that,â he said, feigning offense. âIâd let you take, like, fifty percent of the credit.â Your lab partner snorted beside you, shaking their head as they double-checked the photogate placement. Satoru, undeterred, watched as you bent over to place the cart at the starting position. His group was still setting up, which meant he had time to bother you before he actually had to do any work.
âI bet my groupâs results will be more accurate than yours,â he declared. You rolled your eyes, finally sparing him a glance. âYou do know accuracy depends on precision and minimising errors, right? Which meansââ you motioned to his group, where one of them was currently struggling with the timer, ââyour chances of that happening are slim to none.âÂ
Before he could retort, your professor called for everyoneâs attention, signalling the start of the experiment. Both of you fell into your respective tasks, measuring, calculating, and recording values with practiced ease. You got so caught up in fine-tuning your results that Satoru didnât get the chance to throw more taunts your way. That was until, while waiting for your next trial to begin, you turned to your friend beside you, excitement bubbling over.
âOh my god, I finally watched Whisper of the Heart last night,â you gushed, voice dropping into that high-pitched, dreamy tone reserved for things you were completely obsessed with. Your friend gasped, clutching your arm. âStop. You did not.â
âI did.â
âDID YOU CRY?â
âOBVIOUSLY.âÂ
Satoru, who had been focused on adjusting his groupâs ramp, stilled slightly. He knew that movie. More than that, he could predict exactly why you were talking about it. Casually, he glanced over, pretending to check his photogate readings while shamelessly eavesdropping. Your friend squeezed your arm excitedly. âI told you it was perfect. The vibes, the music, the slow-burn romance. Tell me you loved Seiji.â
âOh, I loved Seiji,â you sighed, eyes sparkling. âLike, the way he was so ambitious but still so soft? And the way he believed in her? And the fact that he left little signs for her without even realizing how much theyâd mean?â You could feel yourself getting lost in the emotions of it, and your friend was right there with you, nodding along enthusiastically. âIt was so romantic,â she said dreamily. âThe idea of someone quietly believing in you and pushing you forward. Itâs justââ
âSO good,â you finished for her, and the two of you squealed quietly before catching yourselves and trying to focus again. Then, almost absentmindedly, you added, âHonestly, I feel like Iâm in Whisper of the Heart right now.â Your friend perked up. âHow so?â
You nudged her lightly. âBecause of G.S.â
Satoru, who had been handling the cart for his next trial, fumbled slightly. Your friendâs eyes widened knowingly. âNo way. You mean your G.S.?âÂ
You groaned. âDonât call him that. But yeah. The whole leaving-annotations-in-the-books thing? And how I keep borrowing them? Itâs totally giving Seiji and Shizuku. Like yeah I kinda sound corny right nowââ
âNot really honestly, I get itââ
âExactly! See? I knew I wasnât crazy. Imagine G.S is like Seijiâ scratch that, imagine heâs better, like some sweet, studious, hot book nerdââ
Satoru swallowed, suddenly feeling warm despite the sterile chill of the lab. You thought he was like Seiji? More than that, you thought G.S could perhaps even be better than Seiji? That wasâthat was something.
âAnd next week,â you continued, stretching your arms over your head, âafter I finish studying, Iâm going to borrow the next book.â
Satoru barely heard the rest of the conversation after that. His brain had latched onto one horrifying realisationâ
The last four books werenât annotated. Oh, shit. He hadnât really expected you to grow this attached to his stupid thoughts scribbled on the edges of the frayed pages, hadnât expected you to burn through the series so fast. He completely forgot that he didnât bother annotating the last few books because he had gotten so busy with work. But you had just sat there, eyes sparkling, gushing about his notes like they were some grand romantic mystery. You liked them. You liked his words. Not just the books themselves but the tiny, scribbled thoughts he had left behind. Satoruâs stomach did a weird little flip. It seemed to be doing that a lot every time his nosy ass overheard you talking about his writing.
You really liked his writing. The writing youâd been gushing for about two weeks now. You really found it special. You liked it so much that the thought of continuing the series without it made his chest ache. Because what if you borrowed the next one and found nothing? What if you flipped through the pages, searching for his voice, only to be disappointed? No. No way. That wasnât happening. Initially he had done it as a way to, yâknow, simply yap, maybe desecrate the pages of a book from a library with his oh so superior commentary. But now? He was going to do this for you. Because the way you had talked about Whisper of the Heartâthe way your face had gone soft and dreamy, the way your voice had gotten all excitedâhe wanted that. He wanted to hear you talk about how much you enjoyed the little quips that made their way into his head every time he read something. He wanted to be the reason you spoke like that again. Maybe it was pathetic, but he wantedâ really wanted to once again be the reason why your cheeks slightly went pink when your friend called him yours. Even if they were his initials, they were his, and it insinuated he belonged to you, right?
The second class ended, Satoru bolted. There was no time to waste. He had four books to annotate, and he didnât care if it took him all night. If you wanted G.S., then G.S. was going to be there.
â
Satoru burst into his dorm, heart pounding as he dumped his bag onto the floor. His fingers fumbled with the zipper as he yanked it open, pulling out the four books you were inevitably going to borrow next. He stacked them on his desk, staring at them like they were some kind of urgent missionâbecause they were. You liked his notes. You liked his notes. That thought alone sent a weird, warm feeling blooming in his chest. He flopped into his chair, running a hand through his hair as he exhaled sharply. This wasnât just about keeping up the act anymore. It wasnât about maintaining the mystery of G.S. or feeding into some casual curiosity you had. No, this was about you. About the way your eyes lit up when you talked about the books. The way you had called himâunknowingly, of courseâyour own Seiji. The way you were so excited to continue the series, fully expecting to find more of his little thoughts nestled between the pages. He wasnât going to let you down.
Satoru grabbed the first book off the stack and flipped it open, his pen poised over the margins. He scribbled his initials in the borrowing card in the same blue ink that he always usedâ he always thought the blueness of the ink was much better than any other pen colour out there. Before he started reading, he did this in all the library cards, and made sure that the date corresponded to the previous datesâ so you wouldnât think it was suspicious that the last remaining books were all borrowed on the same day. He then started readingânot just skimming, but really reading, more carefully than he ever had before. Thankfully he did remember the plot of the first three books, so catching up with what was going on wasnât too hard. Every sentence was weighed, every line considered. What would make you pause? What would make you smile?
When he hit a particularly poetic passage, he underlined it and wrote in the margin: Bet whoever is reading thisâ I just know this made your heart do that stupid fluttery thing.
He smirked to himself. If only you knew.Â
A few pages later, he found a scene with the protagonist staring out a train window, deep in thought. The description was vivid, full of melancholic longing. He tapped the pen against his lips before jotting down: Ever feel like this? Just existing, watching life happen? He could already imagine you reading it, tilting your head slightly, considering his words. Would you reply in your head? Would you wonder what kind of person wrote something like that? The thought of it sent a thrill through him, and he leaned in closer, more invested than ever. Hours passed, but he barely noticed. The desk lamp cast a warm glow over the pages as he worked, annotating with a mix of teasing, sincerity, and the occasional cryptic remark just to mess with you. In the fifth book of the series, there was a passage about finding comfort in routineâabout how little, familiar things could feel like home. He thought back to all the times during your early morning classes, how youâd bring a steaming thermos filled with a tea of some kind, something to sip on while you reviewed the lecture slides before the professor started the lecture. The half cold tea in that same thermos, heâd seen you nursing it outside the exam hall before a midterm while your eyes furiously scanned your meticulous, colour coded notes. Satoru probably guessed that it was a habit of yoursâ to have a warm comforting drink while you readâ lecture notes, physics textbooks, or fiction.
He hesitated for a second before writing: Hope anyone who ever reads this is reading this with a warm drink. Tea, in my opinion, is the best kind of beverage to drink while reading a book series like this.Â
Would you pause when you read that? Would you glance around, suddenly hyper-aware that maybe G.S knew you? That someone had been paying attention? Or maybe youâd think heâs just like you? The thought sent a rush of satisfaction through him. By the time he reached the second last book, his hand was cramping, but he didnât care. He stretched briefly before diving back in. This one had more banter between the characters, something he knew you loved. He played into it, adding sarcastic commentary in the margins. When the heroine had a particularly dramatic internal monologue, he scribbled: Relax, youâre not in a soap opera.
And a few pages later: Actually, never mind, maybe you are.
He could already hear your reaction. The annoyed little huff, the way youâd roll your eyes but secretly love it. You always did have a tendency to refute things first, only to realise you enjoyed them later. Heâd sometimes see it in the way when youâd roll your eyes or let out a disapproving noise at Satoru plainly criticising one of the professors under his breath during a lectureâ but Satoruâs eyes were sharp, he never missed the smallest twitch of your lips as soon as youâd finished your melodramatics. The last book was the longest, and by then, the city outside his window had gone quiet. His dorm was dim except for the glow of his lamp, and his body was buzzing with a mix of exhaustion and excitement. He was too far in now, too absorbed in the thought of you reading all of this soon. This book had a recurring theme about missed chancesâabout words left unsaid and moments that could have changed everything if only someone had spoken up. It hit a little too close to home, but he didnât let himself dwell on that. Instead, he carefully underlined a sentence: Sometimes, we donât realise what we mean to someone until itâs too late.
Beneath it, he wrote: I hope this never applies to y̶o̶u̶ whoever is reading this.
And thenâ and then he wrote another little thing, but it felt a bit too intimate, a bit too revealing so he neatly crossed it out. His pen hovered over the page for a moment. That was the most honest thing he had written all night. Satoru exhaled, rubbing his eyes before sitting back, staring at the stack of books now filled with his thoughts. He had done it. You wouldnât get a single blank page. Youâd find him in every single one.
â
Satoru strolled across campus with a tote bag slung over his shoulder, weighed down by four thick novels. The booksânow thoroughly marked up, pages lined with his messy scrawlâfelt heavier than they should have, but maybe that was just him. Heâd spent the entire night annotating them, barely stopping to eat, sleep, or think about anything that wasnât you reading his words. Now, all he had to do was return them before you got to the library. He wasnât about to let you see him checking them in like some lovesick idiot. He carefully managed to place them back on the shelf after scanning them as âunborrowedâ. He was a few steps from the library doors when someone rounded the corner, and before he could reactâ
Bam. The collision wasnât hard, just enough to jostle him off balance, and he barely had time to reach out and steady you before you could stumble back. âDamn, could at least pretend to watch where youâre going,â he drawled, glancing down at you with a smirk. âOr do you just like running into me?â
You scoffed, adjusting your bag over your shoulder. âYeah, I totally planned that. Just desperate to bump into you of all people.â
âOh, come on,â he teased, stepping aside so you could walk past him. âIf you wanted an excuse to see me, you couldâve just said so.â You rolled your eyes, clearly unimpressed. âPlease. Iâm actually on my way to the library, unlike some people who just loiter around.â
His grip on his tote bag tightened for half a second, but he kept his expression easy, unreadable. âLibrary, huh?â
âYeah,â you said, brushing a stray strand of hair behind your ear. âI finished this book from a series Iâm actually enjoying, so I figured Iâd borrow the next one today.â You didnât even know why you told him that, but you figured it was an improvement from the usual bickering you two always had going on. He hummed, nodding slowly. âOh, okay. WellâŠâ He took a step back, flashing a lazy grin. âHave fun with that.â You narrowed your eyes at him. âWhy do you sound weird?â
âI always sound weird.â
âYeah, but more than usual.âÂ
Satoru shrugged. âDunno what youâre talking about.â You stared at him suspiciously for another second before shaking your head. âWhatever.â And with that, you pushed past him, making your way toward the library doors. Satoru watched you go, fighting the smug grin threatening to take over his face. He could already picture itâthe way youâd flip through the pages, expecting plain text, only to find the familiar, scrawled handwriting in the margins. He wondered if youâd smile. If youâd talk about it again the way you had in class. He shook his head to himself, finally turning away. Yeah. He was so in trouble.
â
You settled into your usual spot at the campus cafĂ©, tucking yourself into the corner by the window with the newly borrowed books. Yes, books. Not a book. You figured that if there were just four more books left in the series, youâd just borrow them now, instead of continuing the annoying walk from your dorm or lecture rooms to the library. The familiar scent of aged paper and coffee beans wrapped around you, grounding you in your routine.
With your drink beside you and your phone silenced, you flipped the fourth book open, eager to dive in. You didnât even bother to check the borrowing card this time, neither had you written your own name in it yet, heart beating a little faster as you childishly hoped that the familiar cursive scrawls were still present in the weathered pages. You had barely made it past the first few pages when your eyes caught something in the margins next to one of the more romantic lines.
Bet whoever is reading thisâ I just know this made your heart do that stupid fluttery thing. You blinked. Your stomach did an odd little flip, completely unprovoked. Honestly speaking, your heart did that little flip more in regards to the familiar blue handwriting rather than the line on the page. You knew exactly whose handwriting that was.Â
G.S. had struck again. A slow smile pulled at your lips as you traced the ink with your fingertip. You had gotten so used to these notes, the little jokes, the occasional deep thoughts, that it almost felt like a conversation now. Like you werenât reading alone, but with someone who understood exactly what youâd linger on, what youâd pause to appreciate. And yet⊠something about this one felt slightly different. You glanced at the ink again. It looked a little⊠darker? Not as faded as some of the earlier notes in the series.
You frowned slightly but shook the thought away. Maybe it was just your imagination. You kept reading. A few pages later, the protagonist stared out of a train window, lost in thought. The description was melancholic, vivid, and all too relatable.
Ever feel like this? Just existing, watching life happen? You exhaled sharply through your nose. Yeah, you thought. All the damn time. You tapped your fingers against the table, feeling that same strange connection as before. Whoever G.S. was, they had a way of making their presence knownânot just through the words they chose to underline, but in the little thoughts they left behind, the questions they posed, the moments they chose to comment on. It was like they could hear your thoughts before you even formed them, like they knew exactly where your mind would linger on the page.
The sun dipped lower outside the arched windows of the campus cafĂ©, casting long shadows across the floor as golden light pooled over the tables. The afternoon crowd had begun to thin, students trickling out one by one, their conversations fading into the hum of the espresso machine and the occasional clatter of cups behind the counter. The once-busy space was quieter now, more intimate, like the world had momentarily shrunk down to just you and the book in your hands. You traced the ink of the latest annotation with your thumb, barely skimming the words but feeling them all the same. It was a strange thingâto be so affected by someone you had never even met. Had you met them? The question pressed at the edges of your mind, unspoken yet persistent. The specificity of some of these notes, the way they seemed to know youâit made your stomach flip in a way you werenât quite sure how to name.
You glanced at the cafĂ© entrance, as if expecting to see someone standing there, watching you, waiting to see your reaction. But no one lingered. Just the usual stragglersâpeople buried in their own work, in their own stories. Still, the feeling remained. With a quiet exhale, you pulled your focus back to the page and turned it, sinking further into the book. The story continued, but now, each annotation felt like something more. Like a conversation waiting to happen. And by the time you could hear the cicadas chirping outside, you had successfully finished the fourth book.
â
Your luck today had been astoundingly awful. The first sign was your hairâa complete disaster from the moment you woke up. Brushing it down did nothing. Water made it worse. Mousse? A grave mistake. You finally resorted to tying it up, accepting defeat. Then came the sharp pain on your forehead, a telltale sign of a forming pimple, because of course your skin had decided to betray you too. But the true betrayal came from your kettle, which, after years of faithful service, had chosen this morning to stop working. No tea. No caffeine. No hope. And now? Now, as if the universe hadnât already tested you enough, you were seated next to Gojo Satoru, his chair pushed obnoxiously close, his long legs stretching out under the desk like he owned the place. His expression was insufferably smug, like he had personally orchestrated all of this just to get under your skin.
Have you ever mentioned that you shared more than one class with Gojo? Sure, you were both in the same physics course, but once again, your luck with picking extra subjects was nothing short of terrible. Thatâs how you ended up in psychologyâa field that couldnât be further from the world of physics you were so deeply immersed in. You had figured it would be a nice change, to explore a different kind of science.Â
Unfortunately, a certain white haired freak seemed to share the same thought process.Â
You exhaled sharply, crossing your arms. âWeâre not choosing your dumb topic.â Gojo gasped dramatically, placing a hand over his chest. âExcuse you, my brilliant topic.â
âYou want to write about the psychology of humor.â
âExactly! Itâs fascinating.â He grinned. âWhat makes something funny? Why do people laugh? Why am I so naturally hilarious?â You pinched the bridge of your nose. âWeâre in a psychology class, Gojo, not a stand-up workshop.â
âAnd yet, humor is deeply psychological.â He leaned forward, eyes twinkling with mischief. âMaybe if you had a better sense of humor, youâd agree with me.â You scowled. âI have a perfectly fine sense of humor.â
âSure you do,â he teased, âin the same way a brick has mobility.â Your jaw clenched. âIâm not doing a research paper on why people laugh.â
âAnd Iâm not doing one on cognitive dissonance,â he shot back, drumming his fingers against the desk. âItâs been done to death.â
âItâs interesting,â you argued. âIt actually ties into real-world behavior.â
âSo does humor.â You stared him down. He stared right back, his lips curving just slightly, like he was having the time of his life getting you riled up.
A muscle in your jaw twitched. âRock, paper, scissors?â
Gojo snorted. âWhat are we, five?â You held out a fist. He sighed, then did the same.
Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. Your scissors to his rock. Your eye twitched. His grin was downright gleeful. âLooks like weâre writing about humor.â
âYou are insufferable.â
âIâm a visionary,â he corrected, stretching his arms behind his head. âYouâll thank me when we get a great grade.â You grumbled something under your breath, flipping open your notebook to at least try and plan the assignment. You werenât about to let him ruin your GPA over jokes. But Gojo wasnât looking at the notebook. He wasnât even thinking about the project anymore. His gaze lingered on the way a few wisps of hair had escaped your ponytail, framing your face. He wasnât used to seeing your hair tied backâit made your features more striking, somehow. It made him notice the little things, like the way your brow creased when you were annoyed, or the way your lips pursed slightly when you were trying really hard not to snap at him. And it was funny. All morning, youâd been looking at him like he was a headache, while he⊠well. Heâd be lying if he said he wasnât kind of enjoying himself. He propped his chin in his palm, watching you jot something down in your notebook.
âYou know,â he mused, âfor someone whoâs so against my topic, you sure do make me laugh a lot.â You shot him a suspicious look. âWhat is that supposed to mean?â
Gojo smirked. âJust an observation.â You scoffed. âAn annoyance is not the same thing as amusement.â
âTell that to your cognitive dissonance.â You rolled your eyes, but before you could fire back, something distracted you. A shift in the air, a fleeting scentâsomething clean and warm, like cedar and the lingering spice of cologne. You blinked. You didnât know why you noticed it now, of all times, but the way he smelled was⊠oddly pleasant. You shook it off, focusing on your notes again. Only, now you were very aware of other things, tooâlike the fact that his hand, resting casually on the desk, was a lot bigger than yours. His fingers were long, his knuckles prominent, and his nails were annoyingly well-groomed for someone who clearly put zero effort into most things. You clenched your jaw, forcing yourself to refocus. Itâs just Gojo, you told yourself. Heâs just being annoying. As usual. Iâm probably ovulating or something. Gojo, meanwhile, had caught the way your eyes flickered over to him, how you quickly looked away after.
He tilted his head. âSomething on your mind?â
âYeah,â you muttered, deadpan. âHow fast I can finish this project so I donât have to deal with you.â Gojo chuckled, and despite yourself, you felt the sound of itâlow and amused, like he found you far too entertaining. âOh, sweets,â Gojo drawled, his voice lilting with amusement, âno way in hell am I gonna let you finish this project fast enough to escape me. Câmon, in our three beautiful years of rivalry, youâve never once tried to get to know meââ
âLetâs just start the project,â you cut him off, already pulling out your stationery and notebook, flipping to a fresh page with more force than necessary. You barely resisted the urge to groan at the topic glaring back at you. Humour. Ugh.
Gojo, of course, noticed immediately. He didnât even have to tryâhe just always noticed things. The way your lips pressed into a thin line, how your fingers fidgeted with the cap of your pen, how your shoulders tensed slightly, like you were already resigning yourself to suffering through an assignment you hated. His smirk fadedâjust a little. And then, before he could think about it too hard, he sighed.
âYou know what?â he said, nudging his notebook aside. âScrew it. Letâs do your topic.â
You blinked, pen hovering mid-air. âWhat?â
âYou heard me,â he said, waving a hand. âCognitive dissonance, weird little psychology experiments, all that jazz. Itâs fine.â
Your eyes narrowed. âThis feels like a trick.â
âWow, you think that low of me?,â he said, clutching his chest in mock betrayal. âI am capable of compromise, you know.â
You gave him a flat look. âSince when?â
Gojo rolled his eyes but didnât argue. Instead, he leaned forward, elbows propped on the desk, watching you with a lazy kind of curiosity.
âSeriously, though. If you hate my topic that much, letâs just do yours. No big deal.â
You stared at him, suspicious. Gojo Satoru? Giving up? It felt wrong.
âWait,â you said suddenly, narrowing your eyes further. âWhatâs the catch?â
âThereâs no catch,â he insisted, but the way he said it, all breezy and casual, made you even more suspicious.
â⊠You want me to owe you a favor, donât you?â
He gasped, scandalised. âSweets, I would never manipulate you like that.â
You scoffed. âYou absolutely would.â
âOkay, yeah, I would,â he admitted easily, grinning. âBut this isnât that.â
You hesitated, drumming your fingers against the notebook. Then, you exhaled, shaking your head. âNo. Weâll do humor.â
Now he was the one taken aback. âHuh?â
âI donât want to hear you complain about how boring cognitive dissonance is for the next two weeks,â you said, scribbling down a rough outline. âAnd youâre actually interested in humor, so weâll get it done faster.â
Gojo just stared at you, like he couldnât quite believe what he was hearing.
âHold on. Youâre giving in?â
âDonât make it weird.â
âOh, Iâm definitely making it weird.â His grin was slow, teasing, like he had just won something. âThis is, like, a historic moment. I should get it framed.â
âGojo.â
âI mean, imagine if people knewââ
âGojo.â
ââthat you actually care about my interests? That youâgaspâwant to make me happy?â You kicked him under the desk.
âOw!â He laughed, rubbing his shin. âThat was uncalled for.â
âYou deserved it.â
âBut really,â he said, still grinning, âthis is kinda nice.â
You quirked a brow. âWhat is?â
He shrugged, tilting his head. âUsually, weâre arguing for ourselves. This is the first time weâve argued over, like, whatâs better for the other person.â Your lips parted slightly. You hadnât thought about it like that. For a moment, neither of you spoke. Then, absurdly, a little laugh slipped out of you. Just a small one, but it was enough to make Gojoâs eyes flicker with amusement. And before you knew it, he was laughing, too. It wasnât even that funny, but somehow, the realisation of how ridiculous this entire thing had beenâbickering for fifteen minutes over who should get their way only to insist on the oppositeâhad you both quietly shaking with laughter in the middle of the library.
âOkay, okay,â you finally said, breathless. âLetâs get this outline done before we completely fail this class.â
âIâd never fail,â Gojo said, flipping open his notebook. âIâm naturally brilliant.â
âYou would if I werenât here keeping you on track.â
He grinned. âSee? You like being my partner.â You rolled your eyes, but as you both started drafting the project together, something about thisâabout working with him, actually workingâfelt⊠nice. And even though he was still Gojo, still distracting, still annoying, still insufferably smug, for once, he didnât feel like an opponent. He just felt like Satoru. Not Gojo, but Satoru. Of course, the moment things got too productive, he ruined it.
âYâknow,â he mused, leaning back in his chair, âI am gonna make sure our humor project includes at least one joke at your expense.â
You deadpanned. âThen Iâm making sure our references include an article on the psychological effects of annoying classmates.â
Gojo gasped. âI would love to read that.â
You smacked his arm with your notebook. And, as usual, he just laughed. You two managed to get a lot of the work doneâ not just a solid outline of your project, but the finer details too. Gojo suddenly shoved his chair back, standing up so abruptly that you startled. âI need to do something,â he announced, brushing imaginary dust off his clothes. You frowned, confused. âWhat? Where are you going?â
âJust wait here,â he said, already turning on his heel. Your brows furrowed. âWaitâwhat? Gojoââ
âJust wait!â he called over his shoulder before disappearing down the hallway. You stared at the empty space where he had been, utterly bewildered. What the hell was that about? For a moment, you debated packing up your stuff and leaving just to be petty, but curiosity got the better of you. Huffing, you tapped your pen against your notebook, drumming your fingers impatiently. Three minutes passed. Then five. Thenâ
Gojo reappeared, striding back toward your table with an obnoxiously triumphant grin. In one hand, he held two drinks, in the other, a small paper bag. He set them down in front of you like he was presenting some kind of grand prize.
You stared. â... What is this?â
âSnacks,â he said, like it was obvious. âI see that,â you said, eyeing the drinks. One was clearly milk teaâyours, probablyâbut the other was some sugary monstrosity topped with whipped cream, which was obviously his. âBut why?â
âWell, weâve been working,â he said easily, plopping back into his seat. âFigured we deserved a break.â You blinked, then looked down at the tea again. It smelled⊠exactly how you usually ordered it.
Suspicion prickled at you. âDid youâdid you get this on purpose?âÂ
Gojo took a sip of his own drink, unbothered. âYeah?âÂ
Your eyes narrowed. âHow do you even know what I drink?â
Gojo shrugged. âDunno. Guess I just noticed that one time when I ended up paying for it.â
You paused. The thought of Gojo Satoru noticing anything about youâremembering how you liked your tea, going out of his way to get it without even askingâmade your brain short-circuit for a second. You werenât sure what to do with that information, so you just focused on unrolling the top of the pastry bag, peering inside. There were two croissantsâone chocolate, one plain.
â⊠Okay, but the pastries?â
âI didnât know what you liked, so I got both.â You squinted at him. âThat doesnât make any sense.â He smirked. âSure it does. If you like chocolate, I got it right. If you donât, more for me.â You stared at him, then at the pastries, then back at him.
âUnbelievable,â you muttered, shaking your head.
âUnbelievably thoughtful?â he supplied.
âUnbelievably annoying.â
Gojo grinned. âThat too.â Rolling your eyes, you took the chocolate croissant anyway, breaking off a piece. The tea was still warm when you took a sip, and you hated that it was perfectâhated that Gojo Satoru of all people had somehow memorized exactly how you liked it. He propped his elbow on the table, chin resting in his hand as he watched you. âYâknow, for someone whoâs been roasting me for the last five minutes, you seem to be enjoying that a lot.â
You shot him a look. âDonât push it.â He only laughed, reaching for his own pastry. âNo promises.â
â
Over the next week, you and Gojo fell into an oddly stable rhythm. It wasnât immediateânothing with Gojo ever wasâbut slowly, the sharp edges of your interactions dulled. The bickering still happened, but it felt different, less like clashing swords and more like an inside joke neither of you wanted to drop. Your study sessions were always in the same corner of the library, where Gojo insisted on pushing the limits of how far back he could tilt his chair before it inevitably crashed to the floor.
(âGojo, if you fall and crack your head open, Iâm not calling an ambulance.â
âNah, you totally would.â
âI wouldnât.â
âYes, you would, sweets. You like me too much to let me die like that.â)
Youâd grumble and go back to your notes, but a traitorous part of you was starting to find his antics almost⊠endearing. Your actual progress on the project was steady. It surprised youâGojo mightâve been infuriating, but when he actually focused, he was sharp. He had a way of cutting through useless information, pinpointing the most interesting angle on a subject, making connections you hadnât considered. Begrudgingly, you kind of understood why he was always neck to neck with you in grades.
(âSo, humor as a psychological coping mechanism?â
âMhm.â
âAnd you want to include self-deprecating humor as a subsection?â
âWell, yeah,â he said, twirling a pen between his fingers. âItâs like, prime material.â
âYou literally never make fun of yourself.â
âI make fun of myself all the time.â
You scoffed. âOh, really?â
He smirked. âYeah. I mean, look at meâsix-foot-three, gorgeous, built like a godâmy life is so hard, yâknow?â
You stared at him. âThat was not self-deprecating.â
âNo?â He shrugged, leaning in slightly, his voice dropping just enough to make your stomach do something weird. âMaybe I just want you to compliment me.â
You threw a balled-up piece of paper at his head.)Â
There were⊠moments. Small, fleeting things you didnât know what to do with. Like the time your pen rolled off the table and he picked it up, spinning it between his fingers before handing it back to you, and you noticedâreally noticedâhow big his hands were. Or how, sometimes, when he was reading something on your laptop, heâd lean in too close, and youâd catch the faint scent of his cologneâfresh, clean, but with something warm underneath. You ignored these things. Obviously.Â
But then came the gym. You were only there because you needed to de-stress. The project had been long, your classes demanding, and you just wanted to move your body and clear your head. You werenât expecting to see him there. At first, you didnât even realize it was Gojo. You were just filling your water bottle, minding your business, when your gaze flickered to the squat rack and landed on a very tall, very shirtless figure. And then your brain short-circuited. Because it was Gojo.
And Gojo wasâ
Built.
Like, really built. You had known he was tall. You had known he was in shape. But knowing and seeing were two different things. His usual oversized hoodies and button-ups had hidden the fact that his entire torso was carved like a damn statue. Broad shoulders, lean muscle, a defined chest, abs for days andâ
Your gaze dropped lower.
âHappy trail. Something inside you malfunctioned. Because, okay, fine, sureâobjectively speaking, Gojo Satoru was attractive. You had always known that. But this? This was different. This was some kind of cruel joke. This was the universe personally handing you a vision of a half-naked Gojo and saying, Hey, enjoy struggling with this one! You were staring. Oh, god, you were staring. You needed to leave. You were about to spin on your heel and get the hell out of there, but that was when he noticed you. His gaze locked onto yours in the mirror, and something slow and amused curled across his lips.
âYo,â he called, turning around fully now, like he knew exactly what he was doing. You were so close to pretending you hadnât heard him, but there were only so many places to run. You forced yourself to walk over, as if this was normal, as if your brain hadnât just imploded from seeing Gojo Satoru shirtless. âYou work out?â he asked, wiping sweat off his forehead with a towel, and you hated that even that was distracting.
âYes, Gojo, I work out,â you said flatly, crossing your arms. He grinned. âHuh. Never wouldâve guessed.â You narrowed your eyes. âWhatâs that supposed to mean?â He just shrugged, all easy confidence and knowing smirks. âYou donât exactly look like the gym type, sweets.â
âBecause I donât look like I can deadlift a hundred kilos?â you shot back.Â
He tilted his head. âCan you?â
â⊠No.âÂ
He laughed, tossing the towel over his shoulder. âThen I rest my case.â You scowled. âYouâre annoying.â
âAnd youâre staring,â he quipped, and your breath caught in your throat. Your face heated. âIâI am not.â His smirk deepened. âSure you arenât.â
You clenched your jaw, trying to school your expression into something neutral. You refused to let him know he was right. But as you turned on your heel and all but stomped to another part of the gym, you could still feel his gaze on you. And the worst part? You didnât hate it.Â
The next day, you almost considered canceling your study session. Not because you were avoiding Gojo. Obviously. You were just busy. Lots of work. Essays. Big academic responsibilities. But you werenât a coward. (And okay, fine, maybe a tiny part of you was curious to see if things would be normal again. Not that things were weird, butâwell. Whatever.) When you arrived at the library, Gojo was already there, feet kicked up on the chair across from him, lazily flipping through his notes.
âLook who decided to show up,â he said without looking up. You dropped your bag onto the table with a little more force than necessary. âShut up.â He smirked. âFeisty today, huh?â You ignored him, pulling out your laptop. âDid you actually get any work done?â
He held up a single, crumpled page.Â
You groaned. âGojo.â
âHey, hey,â he said, leaning forward, âin my defense, I was busy yesterday.â You knew exactly what he was referencing. You refused to react. Instead, you snatched the page from his hands. âWeâre never finishing this at this rate.âÂ
Gojo leaned on his hand, watching you with a lazy smile. âMaybe I just like dragging this out so I can keep seeing you.â
Your fingers twitched around your pen.
He was messing with you. Obviously. That was what he did. But it was getting harder and harder to pretend you didnât notice the way his gaze lingered sometimes. Or the way your stomach dipped when he said things like that. You cleared your throat, forcing yourself to focus. âWeâre getting this done today, whether you like it or not.â
âBossy,â he murmured, still watching you. You gave him a look. And then you got to work. And as much as you hated to admit it, your study sessions with Gojo had started to feel⊠comfortable. It was weird. In some ways, nothing had changedâyou still bickered, still teased, still rolled your eyes at each other every five minutes. But there was something different underneath it now, something you couldnât quite name. And you werenât sure you wanted to. Not yet.
â
The lecture hall was packed, the dull hum of students settling in filling the air as you pulled out your notes. Todayâs topic was something about fluid dynamicsânot that you were paying too much attention. Mostly because you were tired. And, maybe, because there was a certain someone sitting behind you. You donât know when or why it had startedâ maybe it was the fact that youâd, well, always been deprived of male attention (since you were hyper focused on academics instead. Those men wonât bring you scholarships, but your GPA will!), or the fact that you had seen him multiple times in the past weeks without feeling the urge to rip his head off, or maybe you actually were ovulating, you hadnât checked your cycle on your period tracking app yet but it was likelyâ
You had been doing your best to ignore it, to ignore him, but Gojo had a way of making his presence known. Even when he wasnât doing anything, you were now even more hyper aware of himâthe occasional shift of his chair, the absentminded tapping of his pen against the desk, the quiet sighs of boredom that you knew were dramatic. And then, just as you were finally starting to concentrate, you felt it. A presence leaning in behind you, the faintest brush of breath against your ear.
âSweets,â Gojo whispered, his voice low, teasing.
Your whole body went rigid. âWhat,â you hissed, barely moving your lips, keeping your eyes trained on the professor at the front of the room.
âThereâs a fatal flaw in this lecture,â he murmured, his voice laced with amusement. You refused to turn around. âGojo, I swearââ
âI mean, really,â he continued, like you hadnât spoken, âhow can they expect us to focus on physics when youâre sitting right in front of me?â Your grip on your pen tightened. Your face was definitely heating up. Slowly, finally, you turned your head just enough to glare at him. âAre you seriously flirting with me in the middle of a lecture on fluid dynamics?â
Gojo grinned, chin resting on his palm, looking utterly unrepentant. âIâm not flirting. Iâm just⊠yâknow⊠testing like behaviourism, or whatever.â
You inhaled sharply, willing yourself not to react. Noticing your silence, his smirk grew.
âOr,â he whispered, tilting his head, âis the idea of me flirting with you not so bad?â Your brain short-circuited for half a second. Then you turned back around, focusing very hard on your notes, pretending you hadnât heard him, pretending your heart wasnât doing something very annoying in your chest. Behind you, Gojo chuckled softly, and you could feel his smirk.
You hated him. You hated him. Nah, you didnât. You just⊠now mildly disliked him.
â
By the time the physics final rolled around, your life had been reduced to a frantic cycle of cramming formulas, flipping through notes, and barely surviving on caffeine. The psychology project with Gojo had taken up way more time than you expectedânot just because of the work itself, but because of him. His constant presence, his insufferable teasing, the way he somehow made long study sessions more bearable with his antics. It was irritatingly easy to fall into a rhythm with him, and by the time youâd turned in your joint paper, you were too mentally exhausted to even think about anything else. Which was probably why you forgot about book five. When you finally let yourself have a break, that you found it tucked away in your bag.
The sight of it sent a flicker of guilt through your chestâyouâd been so eager to read it, and then you just⊠hadnât. You curled up by the window, the campus cafĂ© bustling quietly in the background, warm drink in hand as you flipped open the book. This one was slightly smaller than the other ones in terms of lengthâ youâd be able to finish it in an hour or so. The familiarity of the prose was comforting, like stepping back into a world you knew well. And then, right beside a passage about finding comfort in the little thingsâthe warmth of a cup of tea, the quiet joy of returning to a familiar bookâwas an annotation.
Hope anyone who ever reads this is reading this with a warm drink. Tea, in my opinion, is the best kind of beverage to drink while reading a book series like this.
Your breath caught in your throat.
Okay. That was⊠oddly specific.
A chillânot unpleasant, but strangeâcrept up your spine. It wasnât just the words themselves, but the fact that G.S. knew this about you. It was as if theyâd noticed your habit of your love of tea. But it was probably a coincidence. I mean, tea is enjoyed by millions of people in the world, right? You exhaled slowly, shaking the feeling off as you flipped a few more pages. The wittiness of the quips grew, and you eagerly read through each one with heightened interest. In about forty five minutes, you had managed to finish the fifth book with ease. Since you had some free time to spare, you started on the second last book.
The first note you came across was pure sarcasm, scrawled beside a particularly dramatic inner monologue from the protagonist.
Relax, youâre not in a soap opera.
And a few pages later: Actually, never mind, maybe you are.
You huffed a quiet laugh, rolling your eyes. The teasing was familiar, familiar enough to imbue a sense of relaxation in you. The annotations drew you in, the ink curling across the margins like whispered thoughts meant just for you. It was easy to imagine G.S. sitting beside you, their presence warm and familiar, flipping through the pages with quiet amusement. Someone who knew exactly which passages would make you pause, who understood the way certain lines lingered in your mind long after youâd read them.
Your fingers traced over the words they had left behind, and for a moment, you let yourself daydream. You imagined meeting themâG.S., whoever they were. The two of you sitting in some hidden corner of a library, books stacked high around you, the world outside fading away. Maybe their voice was soft, thoughtful, the kind that made you want to lean in a little closer. Maybe they smiled when you argued about a particular passage, when you pointed out something theyâd written in the margins.
Maybe they would look at you like you were something worth understanding.
The thought sent a strange warmth curling through your chest. It was silly, this little fantasy, but you let yourself indulge in it anyway. And that was when your brain betrayed you.
For a brief, horrifying moment, the faceless idea of G.S. wasnât faceless anymore. The image of Gojo flashed into your mind, unbidden and unwanted. But it wasnât just him reading beside you, wasnât just him scrawling out these notes with his long, annoyingly pretty fingers.
It was him kissing you.
Gojoâs lips brushing against yours, lazy and confident, like it was the most natural thing in the world. His hand sliding up your spine, the heat of him pressing against you, that teasing voice of his murmuring something you wouldnât quite catchâ
Your entire body froze.
No.
No, no, no.
You tried to shake it off, tried to focus on the book in front of you, but the words blurred together, unreadable. Your mind was stuck, caught on the vividness of the thought that had just invaded it.
Gojo.
Not just Gojo sitting across from you, running his mouth like he always did. Not just Gojo tossing a wadded-up paper at your head or poking at the end of your pen when you were trying to write. Noâyour brain had conjured up something else entirely. Gojo leaning in too close, his breath warm against your lips. The weight of his hand pressing into the small of your back, fingertips splayed across your lower back, your waist, your sides. The slow, unhurried way he would kiss youâbecause of course heâd be like that, because he was always so damn self-assured. Because he never did anything halfway.
And worseâworseâyou could almost hear him. That stupid teasing voice, low and amused, murmuring something between kisses, something only meant for you. Your fingers twitched, and you slammed the book shut.
No. Nope. Not happening.
Your pulse was erratic, your skin burning like youâd been caught doing something you shouldnât. You blinked rapidly, as if that alone could erase the thought from existence, but the sensation lingered, the imagined heat of him refusing to dissipate. It was just stress. Thatâs all it was. You were exhausted, overworked, and had spent way too much time in Gojoâs orbit lately. Of course your brain was short-circuiting. You exhaled sharply, forcing yourself to reopen the book. Back to reality. Back to G.S.Â
Back to anything that wasnât Gojo Satoru and the absurd, fleeting idea of what kissing him might feel like.
â
Gojoâs deep voice cut through your thoughts, pulling you back into the present as he tapped the end of his pen against the open physics textbook in front of you both.
âAnd thenâare you even listening to me?â You blinked, realizing youâd been zoning out. âYeahâyeah,â you mumbled, scrambling for something relevant to say. âProfessor Takeda can be an ass sometimes, even if heâs awesome at teaching.â Gojo grinned, apparently satisfied with your response, and continued yapping as he absentmindedly worked through some small equations on the paper in front of you both. His handwriting was quick and fluid, annoyingly neat for someone who acted like he never took anything seriously.
You didnât quite know how it had happened, but after the two of you had finally submitted the psychology project, something between you shifted. It wasnât spoken aloud, wasnât even acknowledged outright, but it was thereâan unspoken understanding. You still bickered, still argued over trivial things, but there was something else now too. A companionship. A quiet, reluctant camaraderie that neither of you had actively sought out but somehow settled into with surprising ease. And now, you were in the library with him, ironically revising for the upcoming physics final, less than a week away. You werenât sure when he had become your unofficial study partner, but here he was, scribbling down formulas as he complained about Takedaâs obsession with fluid dynamics.
âYouâre still struggling with Bernoulliâs principle?â you teased, shifting your chair slightly to get a better look at his notes.Â
âStruggling is a strong word,â he said, twirling his pen between his fingers. âI prefer âstrategically choosing to ignore it until I absolutely have to care.ââ
You scoffed, but before you could argue, your eyes landed on the book beside your bagâthe sixth book in the series youâd been slowly working through, the second-to-last one before the finale. You had completely forgotten about it. You were pretty sure you had hit the maximum borrowing period, and at this rate, you were lucky the library hadnât sent you an overdue notice.
âI need to go return this,â you muttered, grabbing the book and standing up.
Gojo glanced at it, tilting his head slightly. âThat again?â
You blinked at him. âWhat?â
âThat series,â he clarified, nodding towards the book in your hand. âYouâve been reading it forever. Whatâs the deal?â You hesitated for a moment, not really sure why you felt the sudden urge to explain, but then the words slipped out before you could stop them.
âI⊠I donât know. Itâs comforting, I guess,â you admitted. âItâs one of those series that just sticks with you, you know? And itâs not just the storyâitâs the annotations.â
Gojo raised an eyebrow. âAnnotations?â
You shifted your weight from one foot to the other. âYeah. Someone else read these books before me, and they wrote all these little notes in the margins. Some of them are funny, some are insightful, some are just straight-up teasingâbut they make the whole experience feel⊠shared, I guess.â For once, Gojo didnât say anything. He just listened, head tilted, watching you with an expression you couldnât quite decipher.
You coughed, suddenly feeling self-conscious. âAnyway, I should go return this.â You turned before he could say anything else and made your way to the libraryâs return sectionâonly to find the drop-off shelves completely blocked off with construction tape. A small sign informed students that book returns had to be made manually at the front desk. With a sigh, you made your way to the librarianâs desk. She smiled at you as you set the book down.
âReturning this?â she asked, flipping open the cover to check the borrowing card.
âYeah,â you said, nodding. She hummed, scanning the barcode. âYou know, someone else borrowed this whole series a while back.â
No way.
No way, no way, no way.
Is this how you were going to finally find out who the faceless stranger you had grown attached to was? Your heart skipped a beat. You forced yourself to keep your voice casual.Â
âOh? Can you recall who?âÂ
She paused, tapping her chin as if trying to recall. âGive me a moment dear. Heâs a maleâŠabout the same age as you, actually. Well I think he might be the same age as you. Hmm, he was tall, quite tall, had this head of brilliant white hair, and glasses. His eyes were startlingly blue too. I canât remember his name but you twoâd get along, he seemed very interested in these series too!â She chuckled, taking the book from you to store it under one of the accompanying shelves.
Your blood ran cold.
She continued, oblivious to your internal panic. âHad this little keychain on his bag too. It tinkled a lot when he came in to borrow the books.â Your mind flashed back to the small jingling sound of Gojoâs keychainâ a digimon one. The one that always made a tiny noise whenever he slung his bag over his shoulder. Oh my god.
Your grip tightened on the desk. âRight. Thanks.â
Somehow, miraculously, you managed to return the book without your hands shaking. But the moment you turned away, the weight of the realization slammed into you like a tidal wave. Your breath hitched, your vision tunneled slightly, and for a second, you werenât sure if your legs would carry you back to the table.
Gojo.
Gojo was G.S.
The knowledge settled in your bones with a dizzying clarity, making the library around you feel unreal, like you were wading through a dream you couldnât wake up from. The notes, the teasing comments, the underlined passagesâit had all been him. The same Gojo Satoru who drove you insane with his arrogance, who somehow wormed his way into your study sessions, who made physics revision bearable with his endless chatter. And he had never said a word about it. By the time you reached the table, your emotions were tangled beyond recognitionâembarrassment, frustration, something dangerously close to hurt. You dropped into your seat, a little too forcefully, the noise drawing his attention.
Gojo barely glanced up from his notes. âYou okay? You look like you just saw a ghost.â
You swallowed, pulse thrumming against your ribs. Your fingers curled into fists against your lap. You felt like you were standing on the edge of something sharp, something that could cut you open if you werenât careful.
âItâs you,â you said, your voice barely above a whisper.
He finally met your gaze, his pen stilling against the page. For a secondâjust a secondâthere was nothing but blankness in his expression, as if he truly didnât understand what you meant. But then, recognition flickered in those bright, unreadable eyes. And slowly, like he had been waiting for this exact moment, he grinned.
âTook you long enough.â
A sharp breath escaped you, like the wind had been knocked from your lungs. Something twisted in your chest. He knew. He had known. You exhaled shakily, trying to hold onto your composure, but your voice wavered when you spoke again. âYouââ You swallowed hard. âYou knew it was me reading those books, and you justââ
He didnât deny it. Didnât even try. You hated the way he was looking at you, like this was funny, like this was just some game he had been playing all along. Like he had been waiting for you to connect the dots, to put the pieces together while he sat back and watched. Something inside you cracked.
âYou were just messing with me.â The words came out quiet, but there was something raw beneath them, something unsteady. âThatâs what this was, right? Just another one of your games?â
For the first time, his smirk faltered.
âThatâs notââ
But you didnât let him finish.
You stood up too fast, your chair scraping loudly against the floor. A few heads turned, students shooting you mildly annoyed glances, but you couldnât bring yourself to care. You felt like the library was closing in around you, like you needed to get out before you drowned under the weight of it all.
âForget it,â you muttered, voice tight. You grabbed your bag, barely able to look at him. âIâll see you in class.â And before he could stop youâbefore he could say something that might make you stayâyou turned on your heel and walked out of the library. Your pulse roared in your ears, your face burned with humiliation, and your heartâGod, your heart was a tangled, aching mess you werenât ready to unravel yet.
â
You didnât talk to Gojo for three days. Not once. Not in class, not in the library, not even in passing. If he was in a group conversation, you found an excuse to leave. If he tried to sit next to you, you conveniently needed to be somewhere else. And if you caught even a glimpse of him from across campus, you turned in the opposite direction before he could call your name. It wasnât out of pettiness. At least, you didnât think so.
You were hurt.
The weight of it had settled deep in your chest, a slow, heavy ache that didnât fade no matter how much you tried to distract yourself. You felt stupid, looking back at all those late nights spent tracing the loops of G.S.âs handwriting, at the way you had let yourself get caught up in the fantasy of someoneâsomeone you thought understood you. Someone who had felt just as deeply about those books as you had. And the whole time, it had been him.
Had he just been laughing at you? Watching you get wrapped up in his words, in him, while he sat back and waited for you to figure it out? Had it all just been some kind of joke? You didnât know what answer would hurt more. Gojo, however, wasnât making your avoidance easy.
He noticed, of course. The first day, he seemed ashamed. You saw it in the way he frowned when you brushed past him after class, in the way his gaze lingered when you sat on the opposite end of the library instead of your usual table.
The second day, he got annoyed.
âAre you serious right now?â he had muttered when you blatantly ignored him outside the lecture hall, your fingers tightening around your books as you sped up. By the third day, his frustration had given way to something elseâsomething quieter, something bordering on concern.
He caught your wrist as you passed him in the hallway that morning, his grip loose enough for you to pull away if you wanted.
âHey,â he murmured, his voice uncharacteristically soft. âAre weâ?â He hesitated. âDid Iâ?â
You looked at him then, really looked at him, and for the first time in years, you saw itâuncertainty.
Gojo Satoru was scared. But you werenât ready to talk. Not yet. So you shook him off and kept walking.
He let you go. For the rest of the day, you tried to pretend like it didnât feel like a mistake. That night, unable to sleep, you reached for the last book in the seriesâthe one you had borrowed before you found out. You had been meaning to return it. The thought of flipping through those pages again felt wrong after everything that had happened. But something about the weight of it in your hands made you pause. Before you could talk yourself out of it, you curled up in bed and opened to the first page.
And read.
At first, it was mechanical. You skimmed. Skipped paragraphs. Let your eyes pass over the words without really taking them in. But thenâsomewhere along the wayâyou found yourself slowing down. The story was familiar, but it felt different now. The annotations were there, just like before. The same small, thoughtful notes in the margins. The same underlined passages, the same occasional sarcastic remark scribbled beside overly dramatic monologues.
And it still felt intimate.
Your chest ached. Gojoâs handwriting had always been a little messy, but now, you could hear his voice in it. The playful quips, the teasing corrections, the occasional rambling thoughts that trailed off mid-sentence. He hadnât just read these books. He had shared them. With you. But it wasnât until you reached the end of the book that you froze.
A note, scrawled beneath a passage about missed chances. About how sometimes, you donât realise what someone means to you until itâs too late.
To whoever is reading this, I⊠really hope that this never applies to you.Â
And then, right underneath it, you spot a small sentence. Your eyes narrow as you lean in, catching the faint blue ink beneath the initials G.S., nearly lost beneath the hurried strike-through. Itâs messy, almost like he had written it in a rush, then panicked and scratched it out before anyone could see. The ink is slightly smudged, the letters not quite as crisp as they should be. But you can still read it.
T̶o̶ y̶o̶u̶, I̶ h̶o̶p̶e̶ I̶ d̶o̶n̶â̶t̶ m̶i̶s̶s̶ t̶h̶e̶ c̶h̶a̶n̶c̶e̶ t̶o̶ t̶e̶l̶l̶ y̶o̶u̶ h̶o̶w̶ m̶u̶c̶h̶ I̶ r̶e̶a̶l̶l̶y̶, r̶e̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ l̶i̶k̶e̶ y̶o̶u̶.
Your breath catches. The frustration twisting in your chest falters, cracking under the weight of what youâre seeing. This wasnât just about G.S. This wasnât just about some stupid rivalry, some elaborate, long-running inside joke only he was in on. He had liked you.
All along.
The truth of it presses against your ribs, turning your anger into something elseâsomething hot and unbearable and aching. Because of course Gojo Satoru wouldnât have just let you take that book without noticing. Of course he wouldnât have just been some faceless mystery behind the initials. He had been right there, all this time. Watching. Waiting. Never saying a damn thing. You press your lips together, gripping the book tighter, torn between wanting to shove it in his stupidly smug face and the overwhelming realization that thisâthis whole thingâhad never been a game to him.
Not really. Your fingers tighten around the edge of the page, heart pounding. You should be mad. You are mad.
But now? Now you donât know what to do with the way your chest is clenching, your stomach twisting, the words replaying in your head over and over again. He really, really liked you. And he had been too much of an idiot to say it.
It wasnât just a game. It never had been. Your fingers curled around the edge of the page, heart hammering against your ribs. And in that moment, without a second thoughtâ
You didnât hesitate.
You barely registered slipping on your shoes, grabbing your jacket, heading across campus toward the dormitories. Your pulse roared in your ears as you climbed the stairs, the weight of the book heavy in your bag. You remembered the way heâd joked about it onceâhow it was almost too easy to find his dorm because the boysâ rooms were stacked directly above the girlsâ.
("Itâs like fate, babe," heâd drawled, slinging an arm over your shoulders. "Youâre literally sleeping right below me."
"Donât say it like that," youâd deadpanned, shoving him off.
Heâd only grinned, stuffing his hands into his pockets. "What? Itâs true. If you ever get lonely, just know Iâm right thereâ" he pointed up dramatically "âin room sixty-nine."
Youâd groaned at that. "Of course itâs sixty-nine."
"Oh, absolutely." His smirk had been positively insufferable. "The universe practically insisted on it.â)
And now, here you were. Standing in front of his stupid door, his stupid room number glaring at you, mocking you, reminding you of how easily he had wormed his way into your life. You knocked. There was a pause. Thenâfootsteps. The door cracked open, and Gojo blinked down at you, disheveled, his glasses slightly askew. He was in a hoodie and sweatpants, and for once, he looked genuinely caught off guard.
âWhat the hell are you doing here?â he whispered sharply. âWhat if the dean catches you? Itâs past curfew.â
You ignored him. âExplain.â
Gojo stared at you. Then, with a sigh, he opened the door wider and let you in. His dorm was surprisingly neat, save for a few open textbooks on his desk. He ran a hand through his hair, exhaling before leaning against the edge of his bed.
âYou want an explanation?â Gojo muttered, rubbing his temple as if trying to collect his thoughts. His voice was uncharacteristically hoarse, lacking its usual teasing lilt. He exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair before meeting your gaze.
âFine.â
And thenâsomething shifted in his expression. That raw, unguarded look returned, cracking through the facade of the cocky, untouchable Gojo Satoru.
âI liked you this entire time.â
Your breath caught. His words were quiet, but they landed like a stone in your chest, sending ripples through every assumption you had made about the past few months. Noâlonger than that. Yes, you had gathered from that scribbled annotation that he had liked you, but hearing it was different from reading it. The weight of what he was saying pressed down on you, curling around your ribs, making it hard to breathe. He swallowed, his Adamâs apple bobbing. His gaze flickered away for a second, like he was considering taking it back, like he was still terrified of saying it out loud. But then, with a short breath, he pressed forward.
âIââ He licked his lips, shaking his head slightly. âWhen I overheard you talking about the books, about G.S., I thought⊠I donât know. At first, it was funny.â He let out a weak laugh, but there was no humor in it. âYou, of all people, getting caught up in my annotations.â
A pang of hurt flared in your chest at that, but Gojoâs face twisted almost immediately, like he regretted saying it that way.
âI donât mean it like that,â he murmured. âI just meanââ He sighed, dragging a hand down his face. âYou always had this way of looking at me, like you had me all figured out. Like you already knew what kind of person I was. And I guess⊠part of me thought it was funny that I got to be something different in your head for once.â
Your fingers curled at your sides. You werenât sure how to respond to that, but Gojo wasnât done. His fingers flexed at his sides, like he wasnât sure what to do with his hands. His eyes darted back to you, searching, waiting for you to interrupt, to tell him he was ridiculous. When you didnât, he exhaled sharply through his nose, like he was bracing himself.
âBut it wasnât just the books,â he admitted, voice quieter now. âIt wasnât just some joke to me.â His lips pressed together for a moment before he continued. âBecause the truth is, Iââ He hesitated, then finally met your eyes again, his own brimming with something raw and unguarded. âIâve liked you since freshman year.â
The air between you shifted. Your fingers curled at your sides as his confession settled in. You wanted to say somethingâanythingâbut all you could do was stare at him, pulse pounding in your ears.
He let out a breathy chuckle, rubbing the back of his neck. âYeah. Long time, huh?â His voice was softer now, tinged with something almost self-conscious. âIt sounds stupid when I say it out loud. But I did. I do.â
Your mouth felt dry. âSince freshman year?â
His lips twitched, like he wasnât sure if he should smile. âYeah.â
Your mind reeled. Freshman year. That meant before the rivalry, before the teasing had turned sharp, before you had convinced yourself that he was just some cocky, insufferable show-off who loved to push your buttons. Before you had started believing he only saw you as an opponent to one-up. Gojo sighed, dropping his head back slightly, staring at the ceiling for a moment before looking back at you. âYou remember that first day of class?â
You blinked. âWhere we had to introduce each other to the class?â
He nodded. âYou were wearing that stupid oversized sweater that practically swallowed you, and you kept tugging at the sleeves like you wanted to disappear. I justâ at first I thought you were just so cuteâ His lips quirked slightly at the memory. âAnd then you opened your mouth when we argued for the first time in classâ remember? When you answered that question on vector components and I poked fun at you or something, and when you responded back to me, you had this⊠fire in you. You wouldnât let me get a single word in edgewise, like you had something to prove.â
His expression softened, something unbearably fond flickering in his gaze. âAnd I just remember thinkingâshit.â
Your breath hitched.
âI wasnât supposed to like you,â he murmured, like it was a confession he had never meant to say out loud. âBut I did. And when we started arguing all the time, when it turned into this whole thing between us, I thoughtâfine. If I couldnât have you the way I wanted, then Iâd settle for getting under your skin.â He huffed a quiet laugh, shaking his head. âAnd trust me, I tried to stop thinking about it. About you. But I couldnât. And then you started borrowing those books, and it was likeââ He exhaled sharply, like he didnât even know how to put it into words. You swallowed hard, heart hammering.Â
All this time.
Every argument, every smug grin, every lingering glance across the roomâhe had liked you this entire time.
âBut then you kept reading them.â His voice had softened, like he was talking to himself now as much as to you. âYou kept flipping through those pages, talking about how much you liked G.Sâ and god, who am I to deny you when you speak like that? When you speak like that about my thoughts, my feelings, spilled onto the pages of those stupid books? And suddenly, I was waiting for you to borrow the next book. Waiting to see which parts youâd pause on, which annotations youâd react to. Waiting to hear what youâd say about G.S. So Iââ
He exhaled slowly, his fingers tightening around the fabric of his hoodie.
ââ I borrowed the remaining four books or so. I annotated every last one of them, annotated them so maybe, maybe Iâd get to hear that gorgeous voice of yours talking about it in class again. Iâd get to see that giddy smile when youâd refer to me as your Seiji Amasawa again. As your G.S. And honestly, it was worth the entirety of the long night I spent, just so Iâd see you fucking smile throughout the day and snap less at me because G.S. wrote something that made you think he was similar to youâ because in reality, with the way you viewed meâ entirely my fault by the wayâ it would never be possible.â He took a deep breath after saying that.
âAnd I realisedââ He paused, just for a second, like he needed to steady himself. âI liked it. I liked you. Not that I didnât already like you, butâ but I was falling. Like really deep.â
Something inside you twisted painfully. Your lips parted, but you couldnât force out a response. You had spent the past three days agonizing over the idea that he had been toying with you, that this had all been some elaborate joke, but thisâthis was different. This was Gojo Satoru, stripped of his usual bravado, laying his feelings bare in a way that felt like it might physically hurt him.
âThen why didnât you tell me?â you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
Gojo let out a sharp, humorless laugh. He looked away, shaking his head as he rubbed the back of his neck. âBecause Iâm an idiot?â he said dryly. Then, quieter, âBecause Iâm Gojo Satoru, and I figured youâd never take me seriously?â
Your chest tightened at that.
Before you could process that, he spoke again.
âI know I was arrogant. I know I still am arrogant,â he muttered, his lips curling bitterly. âI push too hard. Iâm too much. I act like I know everything, and maybe I do most of the time, butââ He swallowed thickly. âThose annotations⊠they were the only time you ever saw me.â His voice had dropped lower now, almost vulnerable, and something about it made your pulse stutter.
âNot the dumbass you argue with in class. Not the rich kid with the perfect grades. Not the guy who has to prove heâs the smartest person in the room.â He let out a slow breath. âJust⊠me.âÂ
The silence between you stretched, thick and charged.
Gojoâs hands clenched at his sides, his knuckles going white. He looked like he was bracing for impact, like he had just thrown every last piece of himself at your feet and was waiting to see if youâd step on them. Your fingers trembled slightly as you reached for him.
Thenâ
You stepped forward. Gojo stilled the moment your fingers brushed against his hoodie, his breath catching in his throat. He stood up, towering over you, an unfamiliar glint in his cerulean eyes. You hesitated, your fingertips barely grazing the fabric before curling into it, fisting it lightly like you needed something solid to hold onto. His whole body went tense under your touch, his usual easy confidence absent now, replaced with something far more uncertainâfar more vulnerable.
âYou really are an idiot,â you whispered, your voice barely more than a breath against the space between you. His lips twitched, like he wanted to smirk, wanted to tease, wanted to be Gojoâbut he didnât. Instead, he just let out a shaky breath. âYeah?â
You swallowed hard, your fingers tightening against his hoodie. âYeah.âÂ
The word hung in the air between you, weighty and full of something neither of you had the strength to name. And thenâbefore you could second-guess yourself, before doubt could creep inâyou surged up onto your toes and kissed him. Gojo made a startled sound against your lips, his whole body going rigid for half a second, like he couldnât quite believe what was happening. But thenâslowly, desperatelyâhe melted into it. His hands found your face, cupping it with a tenderness that made your heart twist. His palms were warm, his grip firm, like he was terrified youâd slip away, like he needed you to know this wasnât a joke to him. That it had never been. He kissed you like a man making up for lost timeâdeep, searching, like he had been waiting for this moment far longer than even you had realized. When he tilted his head, his lips pressing more firmly against yours, you felt itâall of it.
Every unspoken word. Every missed chance. Every moment that had teetered on the edge of this but never quite fallen. His fingers slid into your hair, his thumb brushing softly against your cheek, like he was memorising the way you felt beneath him. Your heart was a wild, unsteady thing in your chest, thundering against your ribs as you pressed yourself closer, your hands sliding up from his hoodie to clutch at his shoulders. Gojo let out a quiet, almost desperate sigh against your lips, like he had been holding back for so long that finally getting to kiss you was unraveling him.
And maybe it was.
Because as much as you had spent the past few days convincing yourself that this had all been a game to him, thisâthe way he was holding you, the way his fingers trembled just slightly against your skinâtold a different story. Gojo Satoru didnât play games with things that mattered. And youâsomehow, impossiblyâmattered. When you pulled back, slightly breathless, Gojo just stared at you, like he couldnât quite believe you were real.
Then, slowly, he grinned. âSo,â he murmured, his thumb tracing your cheek. âDoes this mean Iâm forgiven?â
You rolled your eyes, but you didnât step away. âDonât push it.â Gojo laughed, bright and real, before pulling you back into his arms.
âGod, do you know how beautiful you fuckinâ are? It drives me insane,â he mutters, his voice low and rough, sending a shiver down your spine. His breath is warm against your lips before he swoops down, capturing your mouth with his own again, his large hands grounding themselves against your waist as if heâs afraid you might slip away.
You giggle against his lips, trying to push him off, but he refuses to budge. âS-Satoruâwait!â Your protest is muffled, barely audible between the kisses he keeps stealing, his lips soft but insistent against yours.Â
He lets out a quiet, needy sound, almost a whimper, his grip tightening on your hips. âShut up,â he murmurs breathlessly, squeezing lightly at your waist as if that alone will silence you. âBeen waiting to kiss this pretty mouth for sooo fuckinâ long⊠Let me get my fill, yeah?â You barely have time to respond before his tongue swipes across the seam of your lips, coaxing them open. The second you allow him in, he kisses you deeplyâdesperatelyâhis tongue sliding against yours, tasting, claiming. The soft little noises you make against him seem to spur him on, his fingers pressing firmly into your sides as he tugs you even closer. His legs bump against the edge of the bed, steadying you between his parted thighs, and the world around you fades, leaving only the two of you tangled up in each other.
A surprised squeak leaves your lips when his thumbs slip just beneath your shirt, brushing against your bare skin. His hands are cold, the contrast against your warmth sending a jolt of electricity through you. He laughsâa quiet, smug chuckleâand then the bastard has the audacity to bite your bottom lip in amusement. âShh,â he teases, lips brushing against yours. âDonât wanna get caught sneakinâ into my dorm after hours, do you?â
Before you can even process a response, his hands move to the backs of your thighs, gripping firmly as he lifts you off the ground with ease. A gasp leaves your lips, legs instinctively wrapping around his waist as he manoeuvres you to the bed. He turns smoothly, lowering you down onto the mattress before climbing over you, his movements slow, deliberate, eager. And this time, you donât hesitate. Your hands fist the front of his hoodie, yanking him down in a clumsy rush to kiss him again, your breath mingling with his as your noses bump. His glasses shift slightly from the movement, and with an annoyed huff, he pulls them off, setting them aside carefully before his gaze returns to youâhungry. His mouth is back on yours in an instant, moving with a mixture of urgency and something softer, something deeper. His lips trail from yours to your jaw, to the delicate skin of your neck, to the dip of your collarboneâhis hands following the path his lips leave behind, fingers toying with the fabric of your open jacket. He pushes it off your shoulders tentatively, almost testing, waiting for you to stop him.
You donât.
A pleased hum vibrates against your throat as his confidence grows, his hands sliding over your arms, your waist, memorizing the shape of you beneath him. Your arms wrap around his neck, tugging him impossibly closer, like you could mold yourself against him if you just tried hard enough. The kiss is more than just the heat of the moment. Itâs more than just the weeksâmonthsâof built-up tension. Itâs the culmination of years of frustration, of stolen glances, of biting words laced with something deeper neither of you had wanted to acknowledge until now.
And maybe, maybe, itâs also the weight of finally realisingâfully understandingâthat the only person who had ever been able to keep up with you, to challenge you, to drive you absolutely insane, yet make you feel like this⊠was him. Satoru groans against your skin, nipping at your neck as his hands slip beneath your shirt, his fingers splaying across your waist. But even in the heat of the moment, heâs calculated. His lips map out a path of possessive little marks just below your collarboneâplaces that can be covered easily. Even now, heâs thinking things through. Your breath hitches when his fingertips skim the skin of your hips again, this time firmer, testing. Your cheeks burn, and the words slip out before you can stop them.
âYou canâyou can take it off.âÂ
Satoru goes very, very still. You swear you can feel the exact moment he processes what youâve just said, the exact moment he realizes that you mean it. His hands tighten slightly against you, his breath coming out a little shakier than before. And for once, for onceâhe doesnât have some cocky remark ready to go. Because this? This is real. And for the first time, Gojo Satoru doesnât want to ruin it with a joke. He gently tugs your shirt up and over your head, eyes eyeing the new expanse of skin that has just been made available to him.
âMy gorgeous girlâŠâ
He whispers out, before heâs back to lavishing your skin with attention, paying close attention to your breasts, lips lovingly, reverently moving across your skin with gentleness you hadnât thought possible by him. You donât know what possesses you, but something suddenly clicks and shyly, you unclasp your bra, leaving your entire upper half bare, making Satoruâs breath hitch. And then, in a moment that takes you completely by surprise, he does something that makes your heart both melt and swellâif that was even possible.
Because instead of his usual teasing, instead of his cocky grin or some flirtatious remark that would make you roll your eyes, Satoru simply looks at you. Really looks at you. His intense blue eyes donât dart downward like you half-expected, donât darken with some unchecked hunger. Instead, they stay locked onto yours, unwavering, all traces of playfulness and impulsive need fading away. What replaces them is something quieterâsomething gentler. A tenderness that makes your breath catch, your chest tighten.Â
Satoru, who always had a joke ready. Satoru, who always teased and never took anything too seriously. Satoru, who could have had anyone but had spent years bothering you insteadâstaring at you now like you were something fragile, something precious, something he wasnât sure he deserved to touch. His throat bobs as he swallows, and then, carefully, softly, he speaks.
âAre you sure you wanna⊠do this?â His voice is quieter now, laced with something that sounds an awful lot like uncertainty. Like heâs terrified of ruining whatever this is. âIâm notâpressuring you or anything, am I?â His fingers twitch slightly at his sides before he hesitantly lifts a hand, reaching out toward youânot to pull you in, not to take what youâve offered, but to tuck a few strands of your hair away from your face. His touch is featherlight, barely there, but it sends warmth spreading across your skin.
âI justââ He exhales, gaze flickering between your eyes, searching, as if trying to read your thoughts. âI donât want you to feel like you have to. If me kissing you made you think you needed to⊠yâknow, do anything moreâthen Iâm sorry.â The words leave his lips like a confession, like the idea of you feeling obligated to be with him hurts him. And thatâthat simple factâmakes something inside you ache. Because Gojo Satoru, for all his arrogance, for all his relentless teasing and larger-than-life presence, was standing before you now with uncertainty in his eyes. Not because he didnât want thisâGod, did he want thisâbut because he needed to be sure that you did too. For a moment, you just stare at him, your heart pounding so hard you can feel it in your fingertips.
Because this isnât how you thought this moment would go. Not with himânot with Gojo Satoru. You had braced yourself for teasing, for him to say something infuriatingly smug, to grin like he had won some long-fought battle. But instead, he was looking at you with quiet hesitation, with care. With something that felt like love. Your throat tightens.
âSatoru.â His nameâ his first name, not Gojoâ leaves your lips in a breath, barely above a whisper. His handsâso sure and confident only moments agoâremain frozen where they rest against your sides, like heâs afraid that if he moves, youâll change your mind.
âI want this,â you say, and you make sure there is no room for doubt in your voice. Your fingers curl around the fabric of his hoodie, grounding yourself in the feel of him. âIâm not saying it just because you kissed me, or because I think I have to. I want this.â His lips part slightly, but no words come out. His grip on you tightens just a fraction, like heâs trying to make sure youâre real.
You take a breath, steadying yourself, because you need him to understandâreally understand.Â
âIâve wanted this for longer than I want to admit,â you confess, a nervous laugh bubbling up in your throat. Your fingers flex where they rest against his chest, feeling the steady thud-thud-thud of his heart beneath your palm. Heâs warm, impossibly so, like heâs radiating heat just for you. âAnd it scares me, Satoru. You scare me.â His brows furrow, the corners of his mouth dipping slightly downward. âScare you?â
You nod. âBecause you make me feel things I donât know how to deal with. You drive me crazy. You make me want to strangle you half the time, and the other half Iââ Your voice catches, and you swallow thickly before continuing. âI want to be near you. I want you to look at me the way youâre looking at me right now.â His hands slowly slide up your sides, not rushing, not pushingâjust holding. His thumbs brush against your ribs, barely ghosting under the underside of your chest, but even that light touch sends a shiver up your spine.
âYou have to know this isnât just some impulsive decision for me,â you tell him, voice softer now, filled with something you canât quite name. âI donât do things just because theyâre convenient, or easy, or expected. I do them because I choose to.â You reach up, cupping his face between your hands, feeling the warmth of his skin beneath your palms. His breath stutters when you stroke your thumb over his cheekbone, and for the first time since youâve known him, he looks completely lost. âIâm choosing you,â you whisper, staring straight into those brilliant blue eyes. âNot because you kissed me. Not because of some annotations in a book. But because I want you, Satoru. I want this.â
A shaky exhale leaves his lips, and for a second, you swear he stops breathing altogether. His grip on you tightens just enough for you to feel it, his fingers pressing into your waist like heâs holding himself back. Then, slowly, so slowly, he leans in, forehead resting against yours. His breath is warm against your lips when he speaks.
âYou canât take that back now, yâknow,â he murmurs, his voice low and almost reverent.
âI wouldnât dream of it.â
In a flurry of kissing and movement, his hands roamed over your breasts, fingers pressing and kneading with a slow, deliberate touch that sent shivers down your spine. Every brush of his palm left a burning trail in its wake, making you arch into him, craving moreâneeding more. His lips never left yours for long, only breaking away to breathe, to murmur your name against your mouth like a prayer, before diving back in, desperate to claim every inch of you. Your own hands found their way under his hoodie, fingertips exploring the firm ridges and planes of muscle beneath. He was all taut sinew and warmth, his body solid beneath your touch, the faintest tremble betraying just how much he wanted this too. Heat pooled in your lower belly, a slow and delicious ache, as you pressed your palms flat against his stomach, feeling the way his muscles flexed under your touch.
And then you felt itâthe thin trail of hair below his navel, soft against your fingers, leading downward. Your breath hitched at the realisation, a flush creeping up your face as your hands lingered there, tracing along his happy trail. The sensation made him shudder, his breath stuttering for just a moment before he let out a low, breathy chuckle. âYouâre teasing,â he murmured against your lips, his voice rougher now, his grip tightening slightly where he held you.
You shook your head, though your fingers betrayed you, still trailing feather-light touches just above the waistband of his sweats. âJust exploring,â you whispered, emboldened by the way he reacted to your touch, the way his muscles tensed as if he was barely holding himself back. His entire body felt heavier now, weighted with desire as he sucked in a slow breath. His fingers twitched against your sides, like he was restraining himself, before he finally gave in.
With one fluid motion, he pulled his hoodie over his head and tossed it aside, leaving his torso bare. The sight of him knocked the air from your lungs. He was beautifulâlean but strong, his chest rising and falling with uneven breaths, skin warm and golden in the dim light. The definition of his abs trailed down to his happy trail, disappearing beneath the waistband of his sweats. There was something intoxicating about seeing him like this, vulnerable yet utterly self-assured, the usual cocky glint in his eyes replaced with something softer, something just for you. You traced your fingers lightly over his stomach, watching the way his muscles tensed beneath your touch. His breath came a little heavier, his hands gripping your waist like he was holding onto the last thread of his restraint.
"You're staring," he teased, though his voice was lower now, rough around the edges.
"Maybe," you admitted, dragging your fingertips just a little lower, reveling in the way his breath hitched. His lips curled into a smirk, but there was a heat in his gaze now, something dark and wanting. âCareful,â he murmured, voice barely above a whisper. âI might start thinking you like what you see.â
Your pulse thrummed wildly, heat licking at your skin as you met his eyes.
âI do.â
He gave you a full-blown grin, the kind that made his eyes crinkle at the corners, his canines glinting in the dim light of his dorm room. It was a look you had seen a hundred times beforeâmischievous, teasing, effortlessly confidentâbut now, there was something else underneath it. Something softer. Something real. His hands, warm and slightly rough, hesitated at the waistband of your sweats, fingers grazing the fabric as if waiting for permission. His touch sent a shiver down your spine, anticipation coiling tight in your stomach. But despite the heat in his gaze, despite the way his breath was uneven and his chest rose and fell just a little too fast, he didnât move forward. Not yet.
âAre you sure?â His voice was lower now, quieter, cutting through the thick silence that had settled between you. His usual bravado was nowhere to be seenâno teasing remark, no cocky smirk. Just Satoru, looking at you like you were something delicate, something he wasnât sure he was allowed to have. Like he was terrified of doing something wrong, of ruining this moment before it could fully begin. You could feel his hesitation in the way his fingers flexed against your waist, could hear it in the way his voice wavered just slightly, as if he was bracing himself for you to change your mind.
It made your heart ache. You reached up, cupping his face gently, your thumb brushing over his cheek. His skin was warm under your touch, and he leaned into it instinctively, like he couldnât help himself. His breath hitched, just slightly, and you saw the way his lips parted, the way his lashes fluttered when your fingers traced along his jaw.
âSatoru,â you murmured, voice steady despite the way your heart was hammering against your ribs. His eyes flickered to yoursâdeep, cerulean, searching.
âIâm sure,â you whispered. âI want this. I want you.â For a moment, he didnât move, like he was letting the words settle, like he needed to make sure he heard you right. And thenâ
He exhaled, something tight and heavy leaving his chest, and his hands finally gripped your waist properly, fingers digging in just a little, grounding himself in the reality of the moment.
âGod,â he muttered, his forehead pressing against yours, his voice almost shaky. âYou have no idea how much I fucking love hearing you say that.â
He gently coaxed you out of your sweatpants, hand finding itself atop your underwear, breath hitching at the dampness that was present. Seems like this fueled his ego a little bit too much, because the next thing you knew, the Satoru you knew was back.
âDang youâre wet as fuck.â
You gave him a pointed look and he faltered, the smirk on his lips morphing into a grin as he ushered out apologies. Your hands clutched the sheets when his fingers began to gently touch you, your bottom lip caught between your teeth as you eyed his hand with need. You couldnât stay mad with him for long the way his fingers tugged the flimsy material down and began to work his hand between your legs. He grinned, experimentally probing around, ocean eyes half lidded.
âThis is where youâre weak, right?â He murmured sensually, fingers finding your sensitive nub, eyes flickering up to watch your reactions, his pretty pink lips parted open in pleasure as he watched you come apart under him. He was precise with his fingers, circling you, teasing, pinching and rubbing, before thrusting in all the right spots, reaching places your own hand was unable to take you. Before long you had to let out muffled whimpers into his big palm that he had slapped gently across your lips; it covered almost the entirety of the lower half of your faceâ you were a bit loud.Â
Unable to take it anymore, you finally reached your breaking point, squirming underneath him as you came all over his fingers. Your chest was heaving, rising and falling in rapid succession, your breath coming in short, uneven pants as the aftershocks of pleasure rippled through you. Every nerve in your body felt like it had been set alight, over sensitised and trembling in the lingering warmth of his touch. Your skin was flushed, heat radiating from every inch of you, and the room felt impossibly small, like it was holding the weight of everything that had just passed between you.Â
Hungry for more, you made quick work of his sweats, sliding them and his boxers down (pokemon boxers but you were too needy to make fun of him for it). Satoru loomed above you, shakily guiding himself to your entrance, pale lashes fluttering as he looked down at you. He was hardâ had been hard the moment you two had started kissing, pressing up against you in a needy manner.
âSuâSure you can take it? Donât need a break?â He breathed out, referring to the fact that you had practically jumped at the opportunity to take things further right after having an earth shattering orgasm thanks to his lanky fingers.
âSo fucking sureâ please, Satoru.â You flutter your eyelashes up at him, and he swears he almost comes from the sight. He nods, leaning down to kiss your lips gently, all the while he ushers himself inside you slowly.Â
Now you knew he had meant you not being able to take it because you might have been tired after your first orgasm, but now it felt more like he was warning you, because he was long, pressing inside of you deliciously. Once he had buried himself to the hilt, he halted in his tracks, giving you time to adjust. His face was screwed in pleasure, likely trying not to give in the urge to move. After a few minutes, when you deemed the feeling of him inside you as highly pleasurable and not the slight uncomfortableness that you initially felt while being split open in two, you murmured out a small âIâm ready,â and that was all it took for Satoru to start moving.
He kept up a slow, steady yet deep pace, his muscular form looming over yours, and for a moment, all you could do was look at him. The dim light of his dorm cast shadows along the sharp lines of his body, emphasizing the taut muscles in his arms, the sculpted contours of his chest, and the way his abdomen flexed with each controlled movement. His skin was flushed, a faint sheen of sweat glistening over his toned physique, catching the light in a way that made your breath hitch. His broad shoulders framed his lean build perfectly, his biceps taut as he braced himself above you, his fingers curling into the sheets as though restraining himself from losing control entirely.
And then there was his face. Messy white hair fell into his eyes, strands sticking to his damp forehead, and his lipsâGod, his lipsâwere parted, slightly swollen from kissing you breathless. His sharp jaw clenched subtly, his throat bobbing with a swallow, and when his gaze flickered down to meet yours, you felt like all the air had been sucked from the room.
His usual cocky grin was nowhere to be found. Instead, his expression was intenseâraw, focused entirely on you, like nothing else in the world mattered. His impossibly blue eyes, darkened with something deep and consuming, dragged over your face, your body, drinking you in like you were something precious, something his. âSatoruââ you breathed, voice barely more than a whisper, but it was enough to make him groan, his grip on your waist tightening as he dipped down, pressing his forehead against yours.
âFuck,â he muttered, voice rough, strained. âYou have no idea how good you look right now. How good you feel right now.â He moved his hands from your waist, his fingers trailing over your skin as he shifted, bracing his forearms on either side of your head. The new position brought him even closer, his body pressing against yours, heat radiating between you as he continued to move within you. His breath was heavy, mingling with yours, and for a moment, it was all-consumingâthe feeling of him, the weight of him, the slow, deep rhythm that sent shivers down your spine. When you had imagined being with Satoru like this, youâd thought it would be⊠different. You had expected teasing, cockiness, maybe even some ridiculous commentary, because that was just who he was. You thought heâd smirk down at you with that usual self-assured gleam in his eyes, crack some joke between kisses, whisper something infuriating just to make you blush. You had even braced yourself for the possibility of him being downright kinky, because he was Gojo Satoru, and he loved pushing limits.
But this? This was something else entirely.
This wasnât just cocky flirtation or the result of years of pent-up rivalry and tensionâthis was intimate. It was raw, real, and so incredibly him, stripped of bravado and playfulness, leaving behind only the man in front of you. The one who had been waiting, wanting. The one who had loved you quietly, even when you didnât know. His movements were deliberate, his touch reverent, his normally mischievous eyes dark with something softerâsomething deeper. When he leaned down, his lips ghosting over your cheek before pressing to the corner of your mouth, it wasnât just a kissâit was a silent confession. A plea. A promise. His fingers threaded through your hair, brushing over your temple, before trailing down to cup your jaw with aching gentleness. âYou okay?â he murmured, voice hushed, almost breathless. You swallowed, overwhelmed by the warmth in his voice, the concern laced into every syllable, and you nodded, reaching up to lace your fingers through the soft strands of his hair. âYeah,â you whispered. âI just⊠I didnât expect this.â
A small, knowing smile tugged at the corner of his lips. He tilted his head slightly, pressing another lingering kiss just beneath your jaw, his breath warm against your skin. âDidnât expect what?â
âFor it to feel like this,â you admitted, voice barely above a whisper. âFor you to be like this.â
Satoru stilled for half a second before exhaling softly, lowering himself further so his chest was flush against yours. His nose brushed against yours, lips hovering just out of reach, and when he spoke, his voice was almost fragile. âI donât think you realise how long Iâve wanted you,â he murmured. âIt was never just some passing thing, yâknow? It was always you.â Your chest tightened, your fingers gripping his hair just a little harder as his words settled deep within you. The air between you felt electric, charged, as if the weight of every unspoken feeling had finally caught up with you both. He kissed you againâslow, deep, purposefulâand you melted into him, your hands roaming over his bare back, nails lightly dragging along his spine. He let out a shaky breath, his forehead pressing against yours as he moved, his body fitting against yours so perfectly that it made your heart ache. There was no rush, no urgencyâonly the quiet, lingering touches, the shared breaths, the whispered words against flushed skin. It wasnât just about desire or need anymore. It was about something much more.
And before long, you were coming again, whispered cries of his name leaving your mouth as you tightened around himâ and if he had indulged in the feeling a second longer, he would have finished inside. He splattered on your stomach, hissing at the feeling, pale eyes fluttering shut. After a few seconds of basking in the afterglow, he quickly went into his bathroom, grabbing a warm washcloth to wipe your stomach down. Your breath came in quick, unsteady gasps, each inhale failing to steady the trembling in your limbs. A slow burn lingered beneath your skin, every nerve alight with the remnants of his touch. The air felt thick, pressing in around you, charged with everything that had just transpired. Heat clung to you, pooling in the spaces where his hands had been, leaving you adrift in the aftermath.
Your fingers curled into the sheets beneath you, gripping them like an anchor, like you needed something to steady yourself against the dizzying sensation still coursing through your veins. A shuddering breath escaped your lips, and you swore you could still feel the phantom imprint of his hands on your skin, the way they had mapped out every inch of you with a reverence that made your chest ache. Satoru was watching you.
You could feel his gazeâheavy, intense, something unreadable flickering behind those endless blue eyes. His hands hadnât left your body entirely, his fingertips still resting against your hips, warm and grounding. There was something in his expression that made your breath catchâa mixture of awe and something softer, something tender. Like he couldnât quite believe what had just happened, like he was committing every second of this moment to memory. He swallowed, his own breathing uneven, before he leaned down, pressing a kiss to your shoulderâslow, lingering, like he just needed to feel you. His lips brushed over your skin again, trailing up toward your jaw, soft and unhurried, as if he had all the time in the world.
â
ââThe room was bathed in the dim glow of his bedside lamp, casting long shadows across tangled sheets and discarded clothes. Your body still hummed from the aftermath, warmth pooling in your limbs as you lay half-draped over Satoru, your cheek pressed against his bare chest. His heartbeat was steady beneath your ear, grounding you in a way you hadnât expected. For a while, neither of you spoke. His fingers idly traced shapes along your spine, the touch featherlight and absentminded, while his other hand rested lazily on your hip, holding you close. You could still feel the heat radiating from his skin, the aftershocks of everything you had just done settling between you in the form of comfortable silence.
It was intimate, more than anything. More than the way he had touched you, more than the way he had moved inside youâthis moment, the stillness, the way he exhaled softly like he was content, was what made your chest tighten.
Then, of course, he ruined it.
âSo,â he drawled, breaking the peaceful quiet. âWould it be weird if I rated that experience a solid twelve out of ten?â You groaned, weakly smacking his chest, but he only laughed, the vibrations rumbling beneath your palm. âOh my God, Satoruââ
âI mean, I am the strongest,â he continued, completely undeterred, stretching one arm lazily above his head. âSo it makes sense that Iâd be great in every department.â
âYou have got to be kidding me.âÂ
He grinned, tilting his head to peer down at you. His hair was a mess, white strands sticking out in different directions, and his lips were still kiss-bitten, smugness radiating off of him in waves. âOh, donât worry, sweets, Iâd never joke about my performance in bedââ
You smacked him again, this time harder, and he let out a dramatic oof, clutching his chest like youâd wounded him.
âYou were being so sweet just a second ago,â you muttered, pouting as you nestled closer against him. âWhy do you have to ruin it?â Satoru chuckled, his arms wrapping securely around you as he pulled the blanket over both of you. âCâmon, you wouldnât want me any other way.â
You sighed, exasperated, but deep down, you knew he was right. He shifted slightly, rolling onto his side so he could face you properly, one long leg tangling with yours. His hand came up to brush a stray strand of hair from your face, his touch softer than you expected after all his teasing.
ââŠWas it really okay?â he asked, voice quieter this time. Almost hesitant. Your heart ached at the sincerity laced in his words, the way he was still Satoru, even after everything. Still checking in. Still making sure. You smiled, cupping his face in your hands as you pressed a chaste kiss to his lips. âIt was perfect.â
A slow, almost shy smile spread across his face, and for a moment, the cockiness was gone, replaced by something softer. Something real.
Then, of courseâ
âPerfect, huh? So you are saying Iâm the best youâve ever hadââ
âGOJO SATORU, I SWEAR TOââ
His laughter rang out through the dorm, loud and unfiltered, and despite yourself, you couldnât help but laugh too, the warmth of it curling around your heart. The warmth of his body, the steady rhythm of his breathing, the lazy way his fingers traced along your spineâit was all lulling you into the kind of peace you hadnât felt in a long time. The teasing had settled into something softer, something quieter, and as sleep tugged at the edges of your consciousness, you thought that maybe, just maybe, you could stay like this forever. Satoru shifted beneath you, his hand sliding from your hip to your waist, pulling you just a little closer. His lips brushed your temple, his breath warm as he murmured, âHey.â
You hummed in response, not quite opening your eyes. His fingers tapped against your skin, hesitant. âBe my girlfriend.â
That woke you up. Your eyes fluttered open, your head lifting slightly to look at him. âHuh?â
He huffed out a soft laugh, like he couldnât believe he had actually said it. The Satoru everyone else knew was loud, arrogant, untouchable. But right now, he was just a boy with messy white hair and sleep-heavy eyes, holding you close like he was afraid you might slip away.
âI mean,â he continued, clearing his throat, âweâre already doing all this. And I like you. A lot. SoâŠâ He exhaled sharply, his thumb brushing over your waist. âBe my girlfriend.â Your heart clenched at the quiet sincerity in his voice, at the way he was looking at you like you were the only thing that mattered. It wasnât a joke. It wasnât just another one of his playful remarks. This was real. A slow smile spread across your lips. âWow. That was kind of romantic.â
He groaned, tipping his head back against the pillow. âDonât make this harder than it needs to be, sweets.â You giggled, shifting to prop yourself up on one elbow, fingers threading through his hair. âYou really like me?â
He turned his head back toward you, his eyesâthose striking, endless bluesâsoft in the dim light. âYeah,â he said simply. âI really do.â Your chest felt too full, your heart racing faster than it should have been after everything youâd already done tonight. But it wasnât nerves or fearâit was excitement, warmth, the dizzying rush of knowing Satoru Gojo, of all people, wanted you in a way that wasnât fleeting.
âOkay,â you whispered, leaning down to press a kiss to the corner of his mouth. âIâll be your girlfriend.â He grinned instantly, arms wrapping around you as he rolled you onto your back, settling half on top of you with a triumphant look. âTook you long enough to say yes,â he teased, but the relief in his voice gave him away.
You laughed, shaking your head. âI hate you.â
âLiar,â he murmured, kissing you again, slow and deep, like he was trying to seal the moment in time. And maybe he was. Maybe you both were.
â
Getting into a relationship with Gojo Satoru was like being swept into a whirlwindâone that was loud, chaotic, and entirely consuming. Everyone around you had the same reaction when they found out: About time.Â
Shoko had rolled her eyes, exhaling smoke from her cigarette as she smirked. âHonestly, I thought you guys were already dating. Youâre both just that disgusting.â Nanami had simply given Gojo a long, knowing look before shaking his head, muttering something under his breath about finally. Even Getoâbefore everythingâhad grinned, clapping Satoru on the back and saying, âI was starting to think youâd never get your head out of your ass.â
Satoru, naturally, took it all in stride, tossing an arm around your shoulders and grinning like heâd won the lottery. âWhat can I say? She couldnât resist me forever.âÂ
Your life since then had been⊠a lot. In the best way possible. Because being with Satoru meant being at the center of his world, whether you liked it or not. And he was obsessed with you. Absolutely obsessed. It was the way he always had to be touching youâhis hand warm on the small of your back, his fingers playing with yours, his arm slung around your shoulders. It was how he looked at you, like you were the most fascinating thing in existence, eyes always following you, filled with nothing but admiration. It was the teasingââI get it, babe. Iâm super hot, but please let me study for five seconds without you getting distracted by me.â
It was the sweetnessâbringing you your favorite snacks when you were stressed, pressing kisses to your temple when he thought you werenât looking. Intertwining his large hand with yours and placing it in his coat pocket And, well, it was also the other thingsâ
âSatoru, we have a lecture in twenty minutesââ
âPlenty of time, sweetheart. What, you donât want to study with me?â
âThis isnât studying. Youâve been making out with me for the past ten minutes. And you really do need to stop. What if someone catches you in my dorm?â
âCâmon, I canât resist youââ
âSure you can, âToru.â
âBut you love me.â
You did. God, you did. And he loved you. He never let you forget it. Youâd studied together for your physics final, working hard side by side. Even though Satoru acted like everything came easy to him, he did work for it. And so did you. You spent countless nights pouring over equations, bouncing theories off each other, fighting over who got to use the good highlighters.
And when results day cameâ
âOh my God,â you whispered, staring at your score.
100%. Your hands trembled slightly as you clutched the paper, the weight of all those late-night study sessions, the stress, the endless debates with Satoru over formulas and theoriesâeverything culminating in this moment. Pure, unfiltered pride swelled in your chest. Before you could fully process it, a loud whoop filled the air.
âYES! I knew it!â
Suddenly, you were lifted off your feet, spinning in a dizzying circle as Satoruâs wild laughter bubbled over. His strong arms wrapped around you, keeping you pressed to him as he twirled you around the hallway like an overexcited kid.Â
âMy babyâs the smartest person in the world!â he crowed, not caring about the amused stares from your classmates. âGeniuses bow to you! The world kneels before you! Einstein weeps in his graveââ
You were laughing breathlessly by the time he finally set you down, his hands still firm on your waist as he grinned down at you. Your heart swelled at his excitement. âYou did well too, right?â
âPfft, of course.â He flipped his own paper up dramatically, flashing his score.
99%.
âI mean,â he sighed, shaking his head with mock sorrow, âyou totally obliterated me, absolutely wrecked my pride, but itâs fine. Matter of fact, I think it was the fact I didnât revise Bernoulliâs principle enough that resulted in me getting only 99%-â
In another world where he wasnât your boyfriend, you would've smirked and gloated about beating him, and he wouldâve snapped back with something equally smug. But instead, all you felt was prideâpure, unrestrained pride for him. You threw your arms around his neck, pulling him into a tight hug. âIâm so proud of you.â Satoru melted into you, his arms encircling your waist as he hummed into your shoulder. âMmm, say it again. I like hearing that.â You chuckled, pulling back slightlyâjust enough to see the sheepish grin creeping onto his face.
âActuallyâŠâ he started, rubbing the back of his neck, his eyes glinting with something suspicious. You frowned. âWhat?â He exhaled dramatically. âYouâre probably gonna kill me when you hear this.â Your eyes narrowed. âSatoru.â
âOkay, okayââ He raised his hands in surrender, before leaning in like he was telling you a juicy secret. âTechnically, I got a 99 on the midterm.â You blinked. ââŠWhat?â He grinned. That smug, trouble-making, up-to-no-good grin. âBuuuut you looked so beautiful when you were all happy about your score, so I lied and said I got 95 last minute.â
Your mouth dropped open. âYouâWHAT?!âÂ
Gojo Satoruâthe cockiest, most competitive man you knew, the one who never let anyone forget how brilliant he wasâhad lied about an exam score for you? He burst out laughing at your expression, reaching out to ruffle your hair. âDonât go feeling all bad about it, sweets. This final weighed more than the midterm, so technicallyââ he booped your nose, ââyouâre better than me.â
You were still reeling, warmth spreading through you as you realised he had lied to see you happy. âYou changed your answer for meââ
âYeah, yeah.â He waved off your shock, smirking. âIâm the best boyfriend in the world. You can say it out loud, babe.â You rolled your eyes, exasperated, before tugging him down into a kiss.
He instantly responded, his grip on your waist tightening, his lips warm and eager against yours. The teasing faded for just a second, replaced by something softerâsomething real. When you finally pulled back, he looked way too smug.
ââŠStill smarter than you, though,â you teased, just to knock him down a peg. Satoru gasped, clutching his chest dramatically. âOh, you absolutely crushed my heart and then ate itââ
Before you could react, he suddenly straightened, towering over you with a wicked glint in his eye. His large hands slid around your waist, ushering you closer until your bodies were flush against each other. His voice dropped, suddenly deep and velvety, amusement laced with something more sensual. âGuess youâll just have to make it up to me in bed, huh?â
You groaned, immediately shoving at his chest. âYouâre the worst.â
âYour worst.â He waggled his eyebrows, entirely unashamed. You shoved his face away, laughing as he grinned, easily catching one of your wrists in his hand. Instead of saying anything else, he simply lifted your hand to his lips and pressed a lingering kiss to your wrist, his lips warm against your skin.
â
Later that night, you were curled up in his dorm, forcing him to watch Whisper of the Heart. He had grumbled and groaned, saying heâd already watched it way back in high school and that he "totally got the whole love and dreams thing," but you still made him sit through it. He spent the first twenty minutes sulking, arms wrapped around you from behind, chin resting on your shoulder like a spoiled cat.
âIâm way better than Seiji,â he huffed after a particularly sweet scene. âLike, a million times better.â You snorted. âJealous of an anime boy, Satoru?â
âIâm just saying,â he drawled, tightening his arms around you. âIf I was in this movie, she wouldnât even look at him.â
âUh-huh.â You leaned back against his chest, enjoying the warmth. âSure, babe.â His fingers absentmindedly toyed with the hem of your sleeve, and for a while, you both watched in silence, the glow of the laptop screen painting soft shadows over the room. Halfway through the movie, you reached into your bag to grab your laptop, but something tumbled out and hit the floor with a soft thud. You blinked at the familiar cover of the last book.
âOh crap,â you muttered, picking it up. âI forgot to return this.âÂ
Satoru turned his head, eyes narrowing. âWaitâŠâ He plucked the book from your grasp, flipping through the pages with an expression that immediately made you suspicious. âYou didnât return this yet?â You nodded, smiling sheepishly. âGuess I kinda forgot.â His fingers slowed as he reached the back cover, eyes landing on the borrowing log where the name âG.S.â had been scrawled in blue ink.
For a moment, he just stared. His thumb ran over the initials like he was absorbing the weight of them, of what they had meant to you before you knew the truth. His usual teasing expression softened, something almost nostalgic flickering in his eyes. Then, in a slow, deliberate motion, he grabbed a pen from his desk, twirled it between his fingers, and, without saying a word, carefully crossed out âG.S.â
You watched as he replaced it with something elseâhis full name, written neatly, in the same familiar shade of blue ink in the column beneath the crossed out G.S. He paused, then handed you the pen. Understanding settled between you like an unspoken promise. Without hesitation, you leaned down, pressing the tip to the page to the column under his name, adding your own in smooth, looping letters.
The same date. The same ink. Together.
Satoru stared at it for a long moment, his usual cocky grin nowhere in sight. Then, slowly, a smile spread across his lips, something softer, something fonder. He looked at you with that unreadable, almost reverent gazeâthe one that always made your breath catch. And then, with absolutely no warning, he grinned and yanked you straight into his lap.
âSooo,â he murmured, lips brushing your ear as his arms locked around you. âHow does it feel to know youâve been fantasising about me this whole time?â You groaned, swatting at his arm. âSatoruââ
He just laughed, effortlessly dodging your weak attempts at smacking him. âNah, nah, donât try to deny it! I knew you had a crush on me.â
âI did notââ
âG.S.,â he sing-songed, his breath warm against your skin as he nuzzled into your shoulder. âYou thought I was some mysterious, tortured genius. Bet you used to daydream about me in class, dâyou think I showed up as some mysterious faceless guy in your wet dreams?ââ You grabbed a pillow and shoved it into his face. His muffled laughter rang through the room, and when he pulled the pillow away, he was still grinning. He kissed your shoulder, lingering there for a beat longer than necessary.
And this time, you let him gloat.
a/n: summary of this entire fic basically (art creds to su2kuna on đ)
sorry if there are error/grammar mistakes or slight plot issues uni is lowkey gnawing at the folds of my brain and a girl gets sick of reading 32k words over and over again.. but i hope you all enjoyed reading this because i really enjoyed writing it :) huhuhuhu much love
Synopsis: in which popular girl!reader is done with shitty players and wants to try the newest delicacy: virgin nerds. Itâs game on to seduce the physics student, who seems more than ready to abandon his life of celibacy.
But their arrangement only works if theyâre both on the same page. What happens when one expects a little more than sex?
Is it game over?
Warnings: eventual smut, porn with plot, fake dating trope, college au, no curses au, mean girl!reader, fem dom!reader, nerd!jo, subby!gojo, virgin!gojo, masochist!gojo, some angst but with a happy ending, very early 2000s romcoms, reader grows a lot (hate towards her will not be tolerated), reader gets humbled quite often here lol, not proofread Word Count: 26k Gojo art by @/Leimiruu on X
Chapter ONE - Game start Chapter TWO - Different levels Chapter THREE - Boss fight Chapter FOUR - Perfect victory
Disclaimers:
†All chapters have been written and will be updated weekly, every Monday. This will also be available on AO3 under reignpage. AO3 will be updated at the same time but broken down into smaller chapters, reading experience might be better over there.
†This is a mix of fluff, smut and angst, so minors/ageless blogs do not interact.
†There will be no taglist as I am pretty certain that I will, more or less, update on time, so be sure to check in on Mondays. But if I am late or cannot post for whatever reason, please do not harass me. I am probably too preoccupied to proofread each chapter to update, so badgering me for updates will not make them come quicker. Trust they will come.
†Any comments hating on the reader in this story will be deleted and the user will be blocked. The story plays on the mean girl trope so you will see mean girl behaviour. Just know this is all intentional. If you are sensitive to a flawed female character, do not read. I know what some of you are like. I have played these games before.
†This story was initially called All Lips No Gloss, but has now been changed to Bubblegum Bitch because MARINA is a queen.
†This is a college au separate from my EdenU au. Different Gojo and university setting altogether. Any semblance is coincidental.
†Every part of this is of my own work. No AI or external inspiration was used. Please do not repost this on Tumblr or on any other platform. I do not give permission for this to be translated. And please do not feed my work into AI.
Do not copy, remake, repost, or translate any of my works © 2026 ReignPage on Tumblr, all rights reserved


