can you do an imagine with jax teller x reader where he cheats on her with tara? reader and jax hooked up after tara left charming (reader was a rebound), reader got pregnant so jax married her thinking he'd get over tara. jax starts feeling guilty bc while he wasn't necessarily in love with reader, he did grow to love her and she is a good wife (the kids are angels and get good grades in school, she gets along with gemma and the club,he always comes home to a clean house and he can't recall the last time he ate leftovers that wasn't a holiday).
This Life You've Given Me
It all happened one morning. Jax woke up and looked to your side of the bed when everything crashed into him; he’d fallen in love with you and he hadn’t even realised. You were only meant to be a rebound; someone to take his mind off of the fact that the love of his life had left Charming. When he found you that day, 5 years ago, quietly crying to yourself holding a positive pregnancy test, he knew that he needed to step up and do the right thing.
He married you two weeks later, making sure that you had as much of the ceremony that you wanted, trying to overcompensate on the fact that, on the day he was getting married to you, he couldn’t stop wishing that it was Tara.
And that brought his thoughts all crashing into him as he looked at you sleeping soundly next to him.
All of a sudden, he felt a wave of guilt hit him, making him sit up and get out of bed instantly, the jostling rousing you instantly, used to being a light sleeper because of your two boys.
Blearily opening your eyes, you noticed that Jax was no longer laying next to you, his side of the bed still warm, making you get up, thinking that it was something to do with the boys. When you poked your head into their bedroom and saw them still sleeping soundly, you made your way into the kitchen, finding Jax sitting at the table, head in his hands.
‘You okay, baby?’ you asked, walking over to the coffee pot, getting a fresh batch ready.
‘I’m so sorry,’ Jax whispered, his head still in his hands.
‘For what?’ you asked, walking over to him and placing a mug in front of him before moving to sit in the chair opposite him.
‘You’ve never deserved any of this,’ he said, sighing heavily before looking up at you, wrapping his hands around the warm mug.
‘Jax, you’re gonna have to tell me what you’re talking about.’
‘This life. Baby, I’m so sorry. When we first started hooking up, you were meant to be a rebound. Tara had just left and I needed someone to distract me so I could carry on helping out the club instead of dragging them down. And then when you fell pregnant, I knew I had to marry you, but I never expected it to be like this. This life you’ve given me, our boys, hell, even coming home to a home cooked meal at the end of the day, it’s everything I’ve ever wanted but I was using you and then this morning, I woke up and looked over at you and it hit me. I don’t know when but I’ve fallen in love with you. I’m so sorry, baby.’ You sat in silence for a little while as you took in what he said, the only sound in the room was your breathing before, Jax looked at you again, anguish in his eyes. ‘Say something. Please.’
‘I knew,’ you replied simply.
Jax’s brows furrowed instantly. ‘You knew?’
‘Of course I knew, Jax. You were a wreck when Tara left, so, when all of a sudden, you started coming to me, I knew I was a rebound, a distraction, but I let it happen because I’d always had a bit of a thing for you.’ As you spoke, you watched as Jax flinched at your words. ‘Even on our wedding day, I could see your heart wasn’t in it and I wondered why the hell you were going through it; it was for our boys and you thought it was the right thing to do. And again, I carried on with it because I wanted our boys to grow up in a stable home and we’ve done that Jax. They’re happy and healthy, they have friends, it’s everything we wanted for them so, if I had to go through life pretending that I didn’t know you were with me because it was “the right thing to do”, then I was prepared to do that.’
Jax put his cup down, getting out of the chair and moving until he was kneeling in front of you, his heart clenching in his chest when he saw the tears that were welling in your eyes. ‘Fuck, I’m sorry,’ he whispered, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you off of the chair and into his lap on the floor. Your legs wrapped around his waist as one of his hands cupped your cheeks, the other holding you against him. ‘I know it doesn’t make up for anything but I promise, I’ll do anything to make it up to you, baby. If you want a divorce, I’ll - ’
‘I don’t want a divorce,’ you interrupted, pulling back slightly to look at him. ‘Jax, I’ve never wanted a divorce.’
‘Are you sure?’ he asked, frowning at you. ‘Because I know that - ’
‘Jax,’ you said softly, making him stop talking and look at you, guilt and love warring in his eyes. ‘All I want is for you to love me, and you’re giving me that. I love you too. I just want us and our boys and this beautiful family that we’ve made together.’
Jax let out a quiet, disbelieving laugh, looking around the kitchen as he held you tightly in his lap. ‘It is pretty beautiful, ain’t it, baby?’
Smiling, you leaned down to press your lips to his, your smile widening when he immediately deepened the kiss, tightening his hold on you as he gripped you impossibly tighter.
