Finally Drinking the Koolaid

[leiladaegil]

Our best rates: New Auto 36 month or less term Top tier credit Auto pay from an account with our institution Applicant: Used auto 72 month term bad credit score Wants to pay manually "Why aren't I getting the best rate advertised on your website?" "Well, sir, because absolutely everything on your application is the opposite of how you get that rate..."

[leiladaegil]

Sudden 6 am craving for kielbasa stew when all I have in the fridge is the salmon for tonight's dinner...

[leiladaegil]

Oh, yes. After this has been dragging out for three weeks, I am most definitely "looking for things wrong" with your documentation. But sir- the point is that I am finding it.

[leiladaegil]

In college, I had a good laugh at my classmate who had wanted a tattoo in kanji that said "artist" and now had the word "lacquer" permanently blazoned on her body. She was as amused by this as I was. I think the person who just now proudly informed me that their user name 天気 meant "heaven's breath" was even more embarrassed than my former classmate to learn that they have the word "weather" permanently displayed on their left shoulder.

[leiladaegil]

The Governor's palace in Colonial Williamsburg. I always liked the Felicity books when I was a kid (even if Kirsten was my favorite).

[leiladaegil]

It is always white middle aged men who are the most… self-assured… about "you're just being an obstructionist- you don't need all this extra paperwork", demanding rates their credit score doesn't qualify them for due to previous financial choices, and purchasing from non-factory authorized ("independent") dealerships.

Who are purchasing a 2021 black Audi The buyer's order reads $130k But the dealer will gladly take their current car as a trade-in for $40k Bringing their purchase price to $90k… …When I put the VIN into JD Power and Associates, it returns the value of the Audi at $75k

You, oh manly expert at car haggling who this stupid female is slowing up the process for, are being SUCKERED

[leiladaegil]

Playing with a negative filter once upon a time I miss these sandals. Comfiest pair I ever owned.

[leiladaegil]

GM Annoyances: Quoting Pop Culture at My Table

It's not cute. It's not original. And it's certainly not funny after I've heard the line 20 times before. I'd be a lot more impressed if your Knight of Pelor came up with his own one-liner. I'm sick of it, flat sick of it. No more Princess Bride, Firefly, Monty Python, Stargate, or any other nerd culture genuflections. The next time a cleric/battlefield medic/agent gives me Shepherd Book's line about kneecapping or whatever, the villain is going to look them in the eye, say "I watched that (period appropriate media), too", pull out a power a minimum of three levels above where they should be, and blow the smartass away. I'm not bluffing.

[leiladaegil]

The Most Bullshit Thing Pokemon Ever Did to Me

You know in X&Y in horde battles how the other 4 will team up to KO the 5th member of the horde if it's a different species? Yeah, so these 4 Zangoose ganged up on Seviper and KOd it before I could get rid of them... ... it was a shiny Seviper.

[leiladaegil]

Long ago photo when I was experimenting with a sepia-toned filter

[leiladaegil]

Half of being a loan processor is being the immovable object that people are slamming over and over with unstoppable force.

No means no.

[leiladaegil]

I still can't believe that I actually held this in my hand.

[leiladaegil]

Monday is... Monday. Tuesday is Monday hangover. Friday is Friday. Thursday is pre-drunk Friday. So Wednesday is really the only day of the week that you have zero excuses.

[leiladaegil]

Three things that remind people of me...

…plague, pimples, and Goldbond. Coworker S comes into work on day 1 and says proudly:

S: I thought of you this weekend! Tada! *holds up bottle of Goldbond

Me: Excuse me?

S: Yeah, because you only put on lotion when your cuticles crack! This one has a cuticle applicator, so I thought of you!

Me: *blink blink...

S: Really!

Me: *sigh

Day 2: Spouse's brother's girlfriend:

L: I heard you're really into history, so since I just bought the audiobook, I wanted you to have my favorite book! It's right up your alley! I thought of you right away!

Me: Oh, thank you! You didn't have to...

*checks book... it's about the London cholera outbreak of 1854...

... it is pretty fascinating, though. Day 3:

Background: I had a zit at the corner of my mouth. It became infected, broke and bled, scabbed, repeat ad infinitum and had been a general pain in the face all week. I had been treating the pain largely through an ice cube held to the corner of my mouth through my lunch break.

Coworker V comes in:

V: You know how I've been complaining about my nose hurting?

Me: Yeah...

V: So, I finally found it. I have a tiny zit in the lining of my nose. On the inside.

Me: Oww. Those hurt.

V: Yeah, all out of proportion to their size. So anyway, I thought of you right away.

Me: EXCUSE ME?!

V: Yeah, because of your face.

Me: *face in hands Why, God? Why me?

[leiladaegil]

For those of you who remember your American history, this is the Williamsburg magazine, from which the British stole the colonists' weapons and ammunition. This, for those of you who need a reminder, was one of the things that enraged the Virginians, directly leading to both the American Revolution and a certain controversial constitutional amendment.

[leiladaegil]

My grandparents first met my dad under... uncomfortable circumstances. He had just gotten off night shift and was still keyed up. He comes back to my mom's apartment, gets a shower, pulls back on his grungy work jeans, and is stretched out shirtless on the couch listening to Black Sabbath while she's getting ready for work in the other room. Doorbell rings- it's like 8am- and figuring it's mom's best friend or someone, he gets up and pulls the door open as he's pulling on his shirt. Halfway through an apology about, "Sorry, M., not dressed yet-" he sees a middle-aged couple and says, "Oh, shit." then, of course, yells, "BABE! YOUR PARENTS ARE HERE!" With Black Sabbath blaring on the record player behind him. Considering the year, I wonder if the album was Paranoid.

Considering my dad's taste in music, I wonder if the song was Iron Man. "Hey, I'm your daughter's new boyfriend." DUH DUH DUHDUHDUH!

[leiladaegil]

This is the only photo I have of Evening Star.

Evie was my baby sister growing up. She used to kill spiders for me until one made her sick, so she became as afraid of them as I was. She liked to jump up on the windowsill half-way up the window- and would occasionally jump face-first into the window in the autumn when she didn't realize we'd taken to closing the windows after they'd been open all summer. She was afraid of going outside and would climb over my shoulder to run inside every time I tried to take her out to sniff things (my other two cats loved going out in the yard with me and I didn't want her to feel left out). I used to have crystals in the window, and she would drag my red ribbon into the red part of the rainbow reflected on the floor, and look up at me proudly. She would hop up on the piano bench next to me when I practiced piano- and then get bored and decide it was her turn, climbing up on the keys and wandering up and down the keyboard. We would fight- loudly- about her habit of scratching at the blankets and the back of my neck until I would let her under the covers at night; she rather quickly learned to mimic the world "brat" ("mrraaaat!"). When I had ignored her for too long, she would sulk- so I would go scoop her up to snuggle a purr out of her. It always worked- she'd be pouting with her ears laid flat, but unwillingly purring away. She had a substance problem- she would eat my dad's cigarette butts, sniff any glue you left out while working on a project, hop up on the table to drink coffee or co-cola's left unattended, and once ate the entire contents of a pan of brownies left out to cool, hiding what she couldn't eat right away in caches all over the house- we were finding mostly chewed brownie remnants for months.

She may have had brain damage, come to think of it.

I feel like I abandoned her when I left for college and she held it against me. It took longer and longer to snuggle a purr out of her each time I came home, and she would pointedly go and greet my best friend while ignoring me. One cold autumn night, she snuck out of my parents' apartment (they'd moved out of the house by then) when mom was bringing in the groceries. Shy little Evie who hated going outside went and stuck her nose into the apartments around them, going into one and looking around long enough to get petted before leaving again… and ran across the state highway and got struck by a car. My mom didn't find her until the next morning. Was she trying to go back to the house? Or, my major guilt, was she looking for me? (1997-2014)